Archive of Our Own

“Aaaaaaaaahh,” Kuroo hears, waking him from the micro-nap he was having against a streetlamp, and causing him to jump at least six feet in the air. 

He looks around, unsure if the sound was real, or was a part of a dream he was having. Especially since it’s 3 am, the middle of winter, and he hasn’t seen a soul since he left Yaku puking at his dorm mates feet, and that had been at least 45 minutes ago. 

Before he has time to fully contemplate whether he’s so drunk he’s imagining things,  he hears,  “Ugh, dammit. Please, oh juicy buns, squeeze through!” He wonders if he really should have heeded Kenma’s advice and stayed home, rather than going to the club.

Before he can get too scared at the thought of being haunted he follows the sounds, and sees something he never could have imagined had he had a million guesses.  There, as he rounds the corner, under a flickering streetlamp he sees two of the most defined, muscular, and gorgeous legs he’s ever seen sticking out of a hole in a wooden fence. The boy is wearing the tiniest little denim shorts, and kicking and flapping as he tries to pull himself through to the other side. 

“What the fuck, dude?” Is all Kuroo can say, his laughter barely contained. Because really what the fuck kind of porno, ‘my stepsister’s stuck in a washing machine’, scenario is this? 

 “Is someone there?” the voice calls back clearly panicked.  Kuroo can see him wiggling - almost as if he’s trying to turn to look at him. 

As if there isn’t a fucking fence between us, Kuroo thinks to himself. 

“Yeah, with you screaming like that, someone was bound to come and see what the hell’s happening. What did you do man?”. As he leans up against the fence, watching Fence Boy (as Kuroo has now named the unknown boy in his mind) struggle, he thinks to himself that yeah, he was right, he really does have some juicy buns.

“I was just walking home and I was thinking about how warm my bed would be, you know, cause I’m so cold in these shorts! Being a ho isn’t easy,” Fence Boy sighed wistfully before continuing, “and then I saw the hole in the fence and I figured I could fit through there, and it’d cut off like half my journey and I’d be home in no time! So I just went for it. I didn’t think my ass would betray me like this bro! Please bro, please, help me out?! I don’t wanna be stuck here forever, I have to go to practice in the morning. Coach is gonna be so pissed if he finds me stuck in a fence.” he cries out. Kuroo can hear the desperation in his voice, even as he’s distracted by his legs and hips wiggling the whole time he speaks.

But if it’s the alcohol or the late hour, or just this whole wild situation, he just can’t help how funny he finds all this. A feeling goes through him, and it’s like he can’t stop himself before he’s bent in half, cackles ripping out of his chest, his body practically convulsing with how hard he’s laughing. He hears Fence Boy’s indignant cries, and it just makes it worse. “You mean to say,” he starts. Then the laughter takes over again, and he’s doubled over, clutching his ribs as screams of laughter continue to pull through him.  

It’s a long time later until he’s calmed down enough to continue, his sides hurting and his breath catching as he tries to explain what made him laugh so much to Fence Boy. “You mean to say, you got yourself stuck in a fence, because your ass is too fat?” Kuroo teases, unable to help but poke fun a little. “And this isn’t some kind of PornHub simulation built just for me?”

“Bro, I appreciate that you think my ass is good enough to be in your PornHub simulation, but this is serious! If any of my friends see me stuck in a fence, they’ll never let me forget, you’ve got to help me out!” Fence Boy begs, clearly serious. He’s squirming so hard Kuroo’s pretty sure he’s going to knock the fence down before he gets himself out of it.

“Stay still, you’re gonna take the whole thing down you keep moving like that,” Kuroo says with a light tap to Fence Boy’s ass, laughing again at the squeak he makes. He’s so loud and expressive, Kuroo really can’t help but play with him. “Say, what do I get for getting you out of here? Because right now I’m getting the great enjoyment of seeing you stuck like this, so I’m not sure I wanna get you out.” He’s teasing. Of course he’ll help get him out. But the alcohol has bought the masochistic side of him out, and watching Fence Boy wriggle about and hearing him whine is something Kuroo just can’t let go of quite yet.

“Come on dude, bro, broski. Best bud. I’ll do whatever you like!” Fence Boy’s tone has become a full whine, the pleading almost on the brink of crying. “I’ll buy you beer, breakfast, dinner. I’ll give you my number so I can help you out when you’re stuck in a fence. Anything! Just please get me out of here. I think I’m losing circulation to my ass,” he practically shouts the final line, his desperation so palpable. 

Kuroo winces, hushing him, not wanting to wake anyone up and make more of a spectacle of this than has already been made. He’s not sure he appreciates the suggestion he might get stuck in a fence; no the basketball hoop incident is not relevant; but still, he’s had enough teasing. For now. “Alright, alright, don’t cry about it, I’ll get you out of there,” he promises with an assertive smile. He rubs his hands together before he places them on either side of the mans hips, trying not enjoy himself too much at getting to touch that juicy ass. He then pulls back as hard as possible, feeling the fence bend against the force, before it snaps and releases Fence Boy, the two of them flying back with the momentum. Kuroo winces as they both land next to each other on the ground with a thud.

They both look at each other in shock, and that’s when Kuroo first sees what Fence Boy really looks like. He’s beautiful, Kuroo thinks. Golden eyes shining in the moonlight; spiky, white-grey hair, slightly soft and with a few loose wood chips from the fence breaking, but still undeniably cute; and he’s broad, Kuroo’s not sure how he got the top in the fence in the first place with those shoulders, but he’s glad he did. He’s exactly Kuroo’s type, and it takes a lot to drag his eyes away from him, and towards the scene at hand.  He’s not sure how himself, but he makes it happen. 

He stands slowly, rubbing his ass where he landed on it, before moving to inspect the fence. “Well, at least it’s only a little broken?” he says optimistically, before he hears it. The sound of the wood splintering, and he grabs Fence Boy’s hand from where’d he’d been sitting nursing his wounds, pulling him up and out of the way as the fence crashes flat against the ground. The whole panel Fence Boy was stuck in was now laying on the street. They both wait with bated breath, before they see the light go on in one of the houses nearby. 

“Ah shit,” Fence Boy mutters, looking at Kuroo. His wide eyes gleam under the street light, before he breaks out into a grin and asks cheekily, “Run?”

“Run.”  Kuroo answers. He begins sprinting, his hand still holding tight to Fence Boy’s as they run together away from the scene of the crime. “I’m Kuroo by the way,” he says, breathless, realising they’d never exchanged names.

“Bokuto,” Fence Boy Bokuto says, letting out the most beautiful laughter Kuroo has ever heard. It’s bright, and clear, and matches the radiant smile that’s spread across his face. Then Kuroo’s laughing too, even as he can hardly breathe because they’re running so fast. To where? Who knows, but so long as Bokuto’s still holding his hand, he won’t stop running until they get there.