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Being the goddess of life isn't simple. So many different forms of life were in competition all the time, it got a little overwhelming at times. Of course, the most complicated life is the humans.
The humans aren't the only ones who wage war on another, but they are the ones who make Asa hurt the most. They understand each other, the way the ants and the octopi can't. So the pain Asa feels when they tear each other apart is so very deep.
So deep that it has torn her apart, turned her most tormented parts into a murky reflection of herself. Yoru is happy for them to wound each other and cheers on their most fervent expressions of hatred.
But hurt was still a part of life, so if Yoru wanted to show her something, she'd follow along.
Asa looks down the row of cages. "They're taking quite good care of these snakes."
"I know!” Yuro coos. “At first, I thought it was boring, but then I thought of how scary those cobras look to humans. It's cool."
It is cool. Asa remembers the spinal structure of the snakes, their intricate overlapping scales, and the tightly packed glands that produce and inject their venom. Some of her proudest work.
Maybe Yoru has developed a liking for her more dangerous creations. Not optimal, but Yoru might be willing to tone some things back, regulate painful parts of the world if she's fond of them.
"And look what the humans figured out! If you push right there and right there, the snake spits venom! Doesn't even hurt the snake."
Why is Yoru so fascinated by this process? Asa didn’t exactly know what the other goddess was made of(how can you understand what parts of yourself you're missing?), but she'd never seen her so interested in small mechanics. Maybe Asa can fost the micro-organisms onto her?
"And they know how to handle the stuff to keep its potency too!” Yoru continues. “They keep it away from the air and everything. But you haven't even seen the best part!"
"The best part?" Asa asks.
Yoru moves the scene to just above a battlefield, where they watch a young man dip his spear into a pale fluid.
Asa's eyes widen. "Wait, is that the snake venom?"
"Oh yeah, baby. Watch!"
The spear throw is high and precise, with Yoru possibly influencing its accuracy. It strikes true, and five times the lethal dose begins flowing into the other man's veins, burning the whole way there. Asa can't think, imagining this a million times over, the gift she gave the small reptiles to protect themselves used to cause unbearable torment. Between humans! Humans who can understand each other and *know what they're doing*!
It's too much. Asa gets as far away from Yoru as she can.
The woods are quiet. Nothing like the battlefields and camps Yoru is so fond of.
But even here, things go wrong. A deer, injured, incapable of movement, still struggles as maggots start on parts of its flesh. She stays by it, hoping to offer it comfort. It doesn't know what pain is, barely understands its injury. It's still hurting.
A blonde boy peers between a gap in the trees, acting like she can't see him. Some death god she had ignored for ages. She supposes she's getting in his way, but she doesn't care. It's basically his fault she's here at all, Yoru's enjoyment of painful deaths is the reason she's been driven this close to a dying creature.
Even in this death is life. The bacteria and fungus have started on the extremities, and the flies lay clumps of eggs as if that was the only thing they were born to do. This life only makes the deer's pain worse. Life begets suffering. If she chooses to prioritize the smaller creatures in the scene, well, even maggots compete with each other, starve to death amid this bounty.
The boy approaches, even if being in her presence weakens him. "You're hurting it."
Asa looks up at him in confusion. "I let it live. I'm keeping it alive."
"You're keeping it in pain. Let me release her."
"She doesn't know what death means!"
"Does anyone? But oblivion has to be better than this."
She looks back at the dying animal. It could barely move its front legs anymore. Was it experiencing anything besides suffering?
She retreats to the treeline and lets the boy touch the animal. He draws a serrated sword, and what remains of the deer's soul is shredded by his blade.
"Sorry about getting in the way."
"It's not a big deal. Death can be patient."
Asa frowns. "Inevitable. I know. I curse the fact sometimes."
He shrugs. "I'm an end to what pains them. They're so bright at the start, but something goes wrong. And you wouldn't want them to suffer, would you?"
"No..." She looks up at them. "You hate their suffering as much as I do, don't you?"
"Is it that obvious? I have to do my job regardless, but to give some mercy is nice."
"Exactly. Um, I'm Asa. Sorry for my rudeness."
He laughs. "Denji. I didn't mind. Why'd you decide to make an appearance?"
"I'm avoiding my twin, Yoru. She's, eh, gotten more unpleasant recently."
"I noticed. More torture, more pain. But that's a part of life, isn't it?"
Asa frowns. "Don't pin that on me."
He puts up his hands. "I'm not, I'm not. I'm just saying, you gotta understand where she's coming from, or you'll never be able to do something about it, right? You'll just get used to it if you don't understand it."
Asa pouts. "I don't want to understand it. I just want this to stop."
"Well, as an expert in stopping things, you have to know what makes them tick. When you're talking physical, it's usually somewhere near the center. Ideas, you gotta talk to the people who hold them. You won't be able to reach it otherwise."
"Maybe I can just avoid her for a while."
Denji tilts his head. "You could. But I imagine she knows where you'd go."
"I could follow you. You see her often enough, you could avoid her."
"I don't see her as often as you think. She's as afraid of the end as anyone." He sighs. "But yeah, I know where she won't be."
The whale's corpse sticks out from the smooth ocean floor, the only point of interest on the surface for as far as Asa's awareness extends. But even in this hostile environment, atop a corpse, life thrives. Asa takes a moment to look at a worm burrowing through a rib bone, eating nothing but marrow.
"It's almost distracting, how much life is here."
Asa nods. "Why are you here, anyway? The whale's been dead for, uh-"
"Two weeks,” he tells her. “Those worms die as soon as they put their eggs in the water. Bigger fish come for the little scavengers. Nothing ever really ends, not even dying."
"Eventually there's no whale."
"True. Still, I have a job here. And I thought you'd like it."
"I do like it, I guess. It's got a balance to it,” she admits. “And there's the whole death-to-life connection there."
"Huh?"
Asa blushes. "Never mind."
He goes back to plucking the life from tiny worms and a poorly placed starfish. Asa hatches some of the worm eggs in their proper place.
Denji looks up at her through his bangs. "It's not a competition."
"It sort of is. You destroy everything I make, even if there's no malice involved."
"That doesn't make it a competition. You started making life one day, and, well, someone had to clean them up when they expired. Like this whale."
Asa doesn't respond, taking a moment to lay down another row of eggs.
"Seriously?"
"How about- never mind, that was supposed to be part of a joke. I should just let you work."
Denji groans. "If you aren't comfortable here-"
"No, no, it's fine. Do your job."
He listens to her for only a few seconds before he's asking questions again.
"Are you going to try and avoid Yoru forever?"
"I don't think I can."
"I'm not so sure,” Denji says. “We managed to avoid each other for eons."
"We're not related."
"I'm sure if you stayed away from her for long enough, you wouldn't really be related anymore."
"She'd probably take some of my responsibilities if I was absent."
"Not so good, yeah,” Denji concurs. “Well, good luck, I guess."
"Can I stay with you?"
Denji stares at her, and regret extinguishes any attempt at clarification.
"If you want. I thought you'd be too uncomfortable."
"If I learn about one idea I don't understand, maybe it'll help with the other?"
"Fair enough. Try not to get in the way?"
She nods, eager to follow. "I'll try."
They spend a lot of time in the ocean. Denji explains that war and conflict happen less there, with so much space. Fish usually flee. Of course, something kills them eventually.
Even the coral reef, brimming with life, is its own kind of death trap. Corals lower in the structure die eventually, and alcoves make excellent lairs for ambush predators. Or holes to die in, for injured creatures with no one to care for them.
"You did good work with the humans,” Denji tells her. “They managed to make the process of dying respectable."
"I can't take too much credit."
"What can you take credit for, if not for something like that?"
"I mean, they make their own decisions,” Asa clarifies. “I'm not responsible for the way the cards fall."
"You let them make their own decisions. No one else was bold enough for that."
"And that gave me Yoru."
"It gave you a lot of other things. Respect, pride. Any great work has a few flaws."
"I don't think I'm any better off."
Denji blinks at her. "She really shook you, huh?"
"Not exactly. I was never sure I did great work. Yoru was just especially discouraging."
"Well, I always thought they were good. And I'm not just saying that for you. Ask around, I told people."
"No, I believe you. I just have trouble believing in myself, I guess."
Denji smirks. "You’ve got at least one believer."
"I suppose I'll have to work with that."
The beach is dark, but that doesn't mean it's hard to see what's happening. Small turtles hatch as Asa points at them, but their journey to the sea isn't safe. Gulls and other seabirds pluck them as they race towards the shore, and Denji collects their souls.
"Such wonderful creatures. Did you know once they grow up, they'll be basically invulnerable?"
"Yeah. Not invulnerable right now though."
"If a lifeform was too durable, it would dominate and remove the competition. Turtles are great in moderation, but too much of a good thing is possible."
"That's fair."
On a distant dune, a figure strides forward.
"I didn't think she'd find us so fast."
"I knew it was a risk when we came here. Let me handle it?"
"I'm here if you need me."
"I know."
Yoru's holding a knife, her knuckles white. She doesn't move as Asa walks up to her.
"Hey, Yoru."
"Hey, Asa. You going to keep avoiding me? It's not the same without you."
"I don't like what you do."
Yoru frowns. "Yeah, well, the living like to make war. I won't shove it in your face anymore, okay?"
"Thanks,” Asa says, with less emotion than she feels.
"What's with the death god? He's got to be getting in your way."
"I like keeping him around."
Yoru raises an eyebrow. "Really?"
"Yes, really. He cares about me."
"Lonely Asa. Makes everything alive, needs a death god for company."
Asa stops, and a crab crawls out from under her foot. "Shut up."
"He's not like you. He's something else entirely."
"Maybe I need something different. Something that changes me."
Yoru shrugs. "Good luck."
"Same to you, I guess."
She walks back. "Come on Denji. Didn't you want to show me the desert?"
He starts. "You still want to go?"
"Of course. I'm not abandoning you just because I made up with Yoru."
"Oh. Alright, it's just this way."
Asa lightly grabs his hand. It stings, just a little, but she can deal with it. With him by her side, she can deal with a lot.