Chapter Text
The camera is a bit fuzzy when it turns on, the background is a glass wall with cubicles visible. The camera is sat on a brown table with a white mug, a brunette sits down in front of it. His white shirt is pressed and his tie is a deep navy blue that might as well be black.
New York State CID
Statement of:
Zhong, Chenle | 41
October 20th, 2006
Chenle moves his finger against the table, as if attempting to move his thoughts. “Repeat the question for me.” His voice is soft spoken as he looks at the people behind the camera.
“We asked about Na,” a small pause, “Jaemin Na.”
“Right, I know that,” Chenle can’t help but get a little snippy, “what do you want to know about him?”
“Just, talk about him back then,” the man sighs like he’s frustrated, “during the case.”
“Jaemin wasn’t an expressive guy, not often enough that it mattered, he cared about work and nothing else. He was so detail oriented that he would rather stand at the crime scene writing out everything he could see than just carrying a camera to take pictures.”
“Do you think it was just detailing?”
“What do you mean?” Chenle’s brows furrow deeply like he’s disgusted by possible implications.
“Do you think he had problems looking at bodies? Like longer than he needed to.”
Chenle scoffs, smacking his palm down on the table. “Jaemin Na and problems with bodies don’t exist in the same sentence. He wasn’t weird but he wasn’t scared of blood or guts. I’m sure if it wouldn’t tamper with evidence, he’d want to dig into the corpses out of curiosity.”
“So, he liked it?”
“You’re really misunderstanding me,” Chenle took a moment to pinch his bottom lip between his fingers, “he liked anatomy, but not in a concerning way. Like how surgeons like digging into patients to help them,” he inhales through his teeth, “I think you’re trying to guide me into saying that he killed those people.”
There’s silence for a few moments and Chenle becomes visibly irritated.
“You really are, you can’t actually believe that Jaemin, the same guy who almost lost himself over this case did it.”
===
The camera turns on again, this time a brown faux plank wall is the background. This time an ashtray sits on the table, and a black haired man sits in front of it. He’s dressed in a white tank top, with a blue and white striped button up over it. He looks visibly tired and like he would rather not be there.
New York State CID
Statement of:
Na, Jaemin | 42
October 21th, 2006
“What do you remember from when you were on the Walters case?”
Jaemin sighs, pulling out a lighter and cigarette while ignoring how he’s told he shouldn’t smoke. “I remember it made me retire, put me in the psych ward, and that people in the CID think that I did it despite the fact we caught the killer.” He stares past the camera as he inhales smoke, tilting down his chin when he exhales. “You’re hoping to get a confession or something compromising, right?”
“No, we just want to know what you saw.”
“I saw a lot, dead bodies, things that didn’t make any sense, natural phenomena that I didn’t know existed.”
“Tell us about the Walters girl, the first one.”
Jaemin looks away, blinking a few times like he was attempting to mentally prepare himself.
“I’d never seen anyone do what they did to her.”
===
“It was September, 1993, easing into fall.”
Chenle sighed as leaned back into his seat, driving with one hand as if he wasn’t supposed to be law-abiding right now. His tongue poked out the corner of his mouth as he reached for his coffee, only for Jaemin to hand it to him. “I wish you’d stop driving with one hand.”
“You told me I had to drive every time we go out, so I’ll drive how I want, Jaem,” Chenle rolled his eyes as he sipped the hot drink, setting it back in the cupholder when he was satisfied, “you piss me off by not wearing your seatbelt and I never complain.”
Jaemin pressed his palm against his mouth as he looked out the window, humming as the scenery passed. “You just did,” he adjusted the way his notebook sat in his lap as Chenle scoffed at him.
“Just shut up.”
“Don’t beg me to talk then.” Jaemin stared at the cattle as they drove past, thinking about how he hadn’t enjoyed a sirloin in months. He hated when they came to a stop in the open field, a tree the only thing in the clearing aside from the soon-to-be-seen corpse of course. He got out after Chenle, purposely waiting so he could sip on his caffeine to avoid the blond’s complaints.
“It was outside Oneida, if I remember right.”
“Here they are.”
Jaemin fought the desire to roll his eyes at the other officer while he tugged at his windbreaker. Instead, Chenle does the socializing, asking about what they saw as Jaemin approached the tree where he saw a circular lid.
The only thing he saw immediately was the circular container, made of wood like those rice storage containers used by sushi restaurants. Jaemin hadn’t learned the proper name yet. The lid had already been taken off and sat to the side. There were several spots of dried blood in a pseudo trail and lungs sat outside it. Jaemin felt his breath hitch when he looked into the unit.
“Ruby Walters had been spiraled into that container. They hadn’t just put her into fetal position, they purposefully broken her bones up after killing her to make her fit into a spiral. Her eyes were open and I remember being completely stunned that someone would do that to somebody.”
“What the fuck.” Chenle’s sudden appearance made Jaemin look up for the first time since he walked over.
“They couldn’t have done it while she was alive,” Jaemin opened his notebook to begin writing, “she would’ve screamed entirely too much and there’s no signs that they had her gagged.”
“They had her bound, though.” Chenle pointed out like Jaemin didn’t, wouldn’t notice. The obvious scarring from unnecessarily tight bindings around her wrist were impossible to miss, Jaemin could only assume they were around her ankles too.
“Do they know her?” Jaemin glanced back at the men who’d commented on their arrival.
“No clue yet, assuming she’s around early twenties..” Chenle pinched the bridge of his nose, “We’d have to pull the body out to even see the actual damage.”
“Jaemin acted a little differently after we saw the body.”
“How so?”
“I assume it was because of his boyfriend, found out later that the day we’d been called in was the anniversary of his death. He seemed too into it, like he’d been trying to escape thinking about it.”
“Take the pictures so we can get the body to the coroner.” Jaemin snapped his notebook shut fast enough it made Chenle flinch.
Chenle bit his words back about the rushing, lifting the film camera to his eye and snapping the first picture of the body. “You write enough?”
“Not nearly as much as I’d like,” Jaemin murmured as he crouched down by the lungs; damaged from smoking, ripped out by the trachea, and missing a sliver. “Looks like a man-eater, or something out of morbid curiosity.”
“I don’t think a cannibal would do all this.”
“Then someone who wants to know the push of the body, see how much it takes until it won’t.”
“What’s the point of killing first then, you can’t learn a thing from dead cells.”
“You know about cells?” Jaemin barely laughed to himself as he stood up, letting Chenle finish his half.
“Alright smartass, just because you suddenly decided you didn’t want to be a surgeon anymore doesn’t mean you’re the only one who knows about the body.”
“Chenle liked arguing, he liked to see if he could work me up or make me get snippy with him.” Jaemin sighs out a laugh as he ashes his cigarette, “he wanted to make me genuinely mad because he said it had to be easier than making me smile.”
“Did you get angry often?”
“Nah, not at all, I only got angry one time when this senior of ours said something to me one time during the case. It was sometime down the line, out of nowhere.”
“Jaemin, you know no one likes you because you’re socially inept.” Donghyeok said it all too easily, and Jaemin didn’t realize he’d slapped him until it happened.
“Jaemin!-” Chenle had already grabbed him from behind to pull him away before Donghyeok could decide if he wanted to hit him back.
“Donghyeok, just walk away, someone like him isn’t even worth the work. They’ll probably kick him to dust after this case.” One of the other officers spoke from his desk and Donghyeok scoffed before walking away.
“Oh, yeah I remember that, I was so surprised by how hard Jaemin hit Donghyeok, he was red for hours.”
“Did he ever have any more moments like that?”
“Getting angry? Not that I know of, I mean he did come over to my house that time drunk but.. That was definitely my fault.”
“When was this?”
“Night after we saw Ruby Walters, invited him over for dinner,”
Chenle turned on the car after Jaemin shut his door, turning them out of the field. “You doing anything tomorrow night?”
“Just planned on trying to sleep.”
“You should come meet my wife, Jeno. She asks me about you often,” Chenle finished off the rest of his cold coffee to not waste it.
“I mean,” Jaemin got an uneasy look, his face contorting at the brow, “I’m not good at things like that, talking to wives.”
“Jaem,” Chenle attempted to placate him, “you got your own charms.”
“Jaemin was kinda depressing sometimes, it could be unbearable. I chalked it up to lack of interaction. His apartment looked comfortably unlived in, too many books about psychology and crime and anatomy too.”
“Your wife won’t be interested in learning about the dissection of kidneys and the mental disintegration of the brain.”
Chenle sighed, “then don’t come over, I really don’t give a fuck, Jaemin.”
“I rather be honest.” Then Jaemin turned his attention back to the window, idly tapping at his notebook.
“But he did come over?”
“Of course, a lot of people thought Jaemin was an asshole because he wasn’t chatty often, or because he was too blunt, too work-centered, but I really don’t think you can have no heart and work in a setting like this. I think that’s why he can be really good at his job sometimes, because even when people don’t see it.. his heart is there.”
“And you really think it’s someone who’s just doing this for fun?”
“That’s all I can gather for now, Le,” Jaemin licked his teeth as he inhaled, “I really don’t think a cannibal would waste, if the lungs were hers. It’s hard to say.” When he bit his tongue Chenle waited, “In my time of working I’ve seen some really brutalized people, and until they put her on a tray I won’t understand it.”
“Of course,” Chenle chuckled, pressing his thumb into his bottom lip as he turned on his turning signal, “how could you? I can’t imagine doing something so insane to begin with.”
“How would you kill somebody?”
Chenle looked over at him for a moment before looking back at the road. He paused like he was thinking it over. “Do you want me to answer that, like actually answer it?”
“I don’t ask questions for no reason.”
“I’d just shoot them.”
“That’s why you can’t imagine it, Le, you don’t want to kill people so you can’t imagine doing it violently.”
“How about you then?”
“I don’t think about it, I know I’d shoot someone.”
“I had shot someone when I was younger.” Jaemin shifts in his seat, “I was raised down south, North Carolina, it’s very common for people to go hunting in the more rural areas. I learned how to shoot a gun from my father’s friend.”
Jaemin takes his last inhale of his cigarette, tossing the filter into the ashtray before lighting up another. “Who’d you shoot?”
“I’m not saying,” he laughs to himself, nothing about his tone happy, “it was self defense though.”
“You say that with a lot of certainty.”
Jaemin huffed, patting his notebook against his palm anxiously. “Because I am.” He still felt hung up over the look of the body, how it contorted unnaturally and surrendering her eyes sat. It was if she knew the outcome and that made his heart twist.
“We ended up going back to the department after that and getting the photos developed. I think Jaemin stared at the photo of Ruby Walters’ body for hours before giving up. He said that he could see the spiral behind his eyes weeks after we’d looked at the body the day we visited the coroner.”
“Tell us about when he came over for Dinner.”
“He looked visibly depressed, not his natural resting sad look, like he was close to crying.”
Chenle opened the door with a smile on his face, a palm pink kiss mark on his cheek. The joy on his face dissolved almost instantly, a soft “Jaemin” leaving him as if he was scolding him.
Jaemin stood holding a bottle of white wine, inhaling deeply as he attempted to fix his wrinkled shirt by tugging it down. “Hey, Le,” he exhaled sharply, “I wanted to buy peach wine but the stores up here don’t sell it.” His words didn’t slur, but he spoke way softer than usual.
“Are you drunk?”
Jaemin didn’t answer so Chenle continued talking, “Jaemin if I knew you’d have to drink to come over I wouldn’t have invited you,” he pinched his nose bridge before opening the door fully, “just, come sit down, why the hell would you drive here drunk?”
Jaemin didn’t get an opportunity to speak before Chenle’s wife came back into the living room. “Oh, are you Jaemin?” Her voice was soft, sweet, welcoming. Her long black hair was held up by a clip and she dressed in comfortable clothes; sweatpants that didn’t belong to her and a graphic tee.
“Jen, yeah, this is Jaemin.” Chenle properly introduced him, forcing a smile onto his face, “can you keep him company while I clean up?”
“Of course,” She gestured for Jaemin to come with her, and he followed with no argument. She smiled at him while pulling a chair, attention turning to the bottle in his hand. “Is that for us?”
Jaemin had been taking in the house as they walked into the kitchen, flowery wallpaper and paintings that made it seem lived in. A wedding picture in the living room. He felt delayed to her question, looking down at the bottle before holding it out. “Yeah, uh, I don’t know how good it is, ‘m sorry.” He sat down once she took it.
“Don’t worry about it, Jaemin,” Jeno talked like someone who knew how to comfort people, “I’m sorry that I’m not making anything special tonight, I had no idea you were coming.”
“It’s fine, better than what I’d do.” He couldn’t help but shift uncomfortably, tugging his tie loose.
Jeno hummed as she stirred the pot, “I’m glad you’ll be eating well then,” she put the wine into the fridge before turning off the stove.
“Jeno was from the south as well a little further down than me, but you’d never tell from her accent.”
They settled into momentary silence while she set the table, placing down three bowls and making glasses of water with ice. She moved the pot to the middle of the table, setting it on a wooden pot holder. “It’s good for you to eat soup in the fall, keeps you warm,” she shook her head to herself as she ladled some of the chicken soup into her own bowl. Jaemin didn’t move to copy just yet. “Are you married, Jaemin?”
“No,” He swallowed softly, “uh, my.. my boyfriend killed himself a few years ago.” He didn’t bother looking up at her, licking his teeth anxiously.
“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that,” she spoke somewhat sympathetically, fingers fidgeting around her spoon like she wanted to pet him up.
“It’s fine, he uh, he’s probably resting peacefully now, life had been a little too hard on him.” Jaemin looked at Chenle when came into the room, effectively shutting his mouth about the topic despite how it made his eyes glossy.
“Jaem, Renjun’s on the line for you. Something about a list of missing persons.” He took a seat when Jaemin stood, “it’s in the living room, table by the tv.”
Jeno watched as he walked out, moving to look at Chenle when he was gone. “Is he okay?”
“What do you mean?”
“Do you two talk about anything other than work?”
Chenle’s brow raised, pausing from lifting the ladle out of the pot, “I mean sometimes, we talk about… things.”
Jeno sighed as Jaemin came and sat back down, making Chenle look a little confused.
“Do you have to leave?”
“Nope.”
Chenle furrowed his brows as Jeno spoke, “what were you saying, Jaemin?”
“Ah,” Jaemin smiled a bit softly, finally making his own bowl now that Chenle let it go, “we should talk about something happier than that, right?”
“I had gotten a little irritated that night because I tried to give him a safe out, Renjun was the only other person in the office who didn’t mind Jaemin so he didn’t mind driving him home. Still he stayed. It went easier but he still looked exhausted the entire time.”
“I’m sorry about the other day, I don’t drink usually.” Jaemin had been staring out the window in silence for the past twenty minutes, he hadn’t talked since he got to work.
“What happened then?”
“Uh,” he bit his lip before responding, “when I went into the liquor store I couldn’t think of a reason not to buy it.” They sat in a long silence aside from Jaemin tapping his notebook, “My.. lover, Minhyung passed away and I was just thinking about it a little more than normal.”
“Why wouldn’t you tell me, Jaemin? We’re partners, you can trust me with things like this.”
“Chenle said it as if talking about dead boyfriends was just something people done. Normally at work you don’t talk about religion and dead people you care about. Who just brings up dead parents like dates?”
“I know, I’m sorry.” Jaemin sighed softly, biting his lip again, “let’s not talk about it again.”
The car fell silent for the rest of the ride to the morgue, Jaemin tapping his notebook and Chenle pinching his lip with his free hand. The sky was grey like it wanted to rain but wasn’t quite there yet. When they arrived, Jaemin didn’t waste any time getting out of the car.
“Can you wait a second, Na?” Chenle hissed as he got out the car, practically chasing after Jaemin as he slammed the door shut.
Jaemin stopped just before the parking lot ended, turning back to Chenle with an unamused look. “I want to get this over with, Le. I’m not interested in looking at her longer than I have to.” He licked his teeth immediately after, thumbing the pages of his notebook.
“You chose to look at the photos for several hours, willingly.”
“That’s all we had to go by, now I won’t have to look at her no more.” Jaemin opened the door for Chenle once he was finally close enough, following in after him. They were almost immediately greeted by Dejun, he looked all too happy for someone who dealt with bodies in Jaemin’s opinion.
“We still can’t find her,” Dejun explained as he pulled her out the cooler, “she’s missing most of her organs, including lungs, intestines both large and small, kidneys, bladder, stomach, liver, gallbladder, they left the spleen, pancreas, and heart. Broke majority of the bones minus the hands and the phalanges in the foot. They sliced down her back, but I didn’t see any damage aside from the broken spine.”
Their Jane Doe had dyed red hair, brown eyes, pale skin. That really didn’t cut down anything for them at the time.
Her wrists and ankles were burned with scars from tightly bound rope, and her chest and stomach held little holes from where the stitches had been. Various yellow and yellow-green bruises littered her body and Jaemin assumed that it came from the bone shattering. Despite everything, they left her face pretty if you ignore how her tear-ruined makeup stained her skin. It made Jaemin ache for her, who she could be.
“I also took photos of everything before and after cutting the stitches,” Dejun smiled brightly at the two of them as he pulled Jaemin from his thoughts, though Chenle was too busy looking at the body to notice. Jaemin did his best for the both of them, his smile was small and just barely showed his teeth like he was unsure.
“Thanks, Dejun.” Jaemin did appreciate it way more than he showed in expressions, “you really look out a lot for us.”
“Ah, detective Na, I’m surprised you don’t have a girlfriend, you’re basically perfect.”
Jaemin bit back the fact he had no interest in women, and he wasn’t over his past boyfriend that died six years ago. Instead he ducked his head a bit with a shy smile, “thanks, Dejun, I hope you get someone soon too.”
“God, how did you get into this line of work?”
“Dejun, stop talking my partner up over this dead body.” Chenle tuned back into the conversation finally, glaring at Dejun like he personally killed his puppy.
“You’re such an asshole, Chenle, I’m just being polite.”
“I appreciate it, Dejun.”
“I know, Jaemin.” Dejun winked before kissing his teeth when Chenle pinched him on his hip. Jaemin felt like the conversation was a little too unprofessional for a morgue, he didn’t mention it.
“Get the photos, Dejun.” Chenle seemed unnecessarily bitter to Jaemin, at least.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say, Zhong.”
The morgue went silent when Dejun walked towards the back, Chenle watching him as he went while Jaemin watched him.
“Why’re you acting like that?” Jaemin finally decided to break it after Dejun was gone for longer than three minutes.
“I have no idea what you mean,” Chenle murmured like he was displeased by Jaemin’s question. He glanced back at him over his shoulder, eyes narrowed with that same displeasure. “I just don’t think playful flirting is appropriate right now.”
Jaemin shut his mouth after that, it wasn’t like he disagreed but he didn’t feel like arguing about how he needed the normalcy that Dejun was offering. Regardless if it was fruitless endeavor for him, then again he supposed Chenle would never understand when he had a loving spouse he could go home to every single night. Jaemin hadn’t had a luxury like that in a long time and he couldn’t pretend to indulge in women well enough to marry someone.
“Got ‘em!” Dejun practically chirped when he came back from his office, at least Jaemin assumed, “someone from the office called, something about a list of missing people, someone named Park, is he new?”
Jaemin took the folder of photos with a shrug, “I haven’t met ‘em.”
“It’s the recent transfer, Jaemin.” Chenle supplied, giving the body another once over before it was pushed back into its personal freezer. Then he swerved Jaemin towards the exit by the shoulder, like someone would their drunk friend.
“Drive safe, detectives.” Dejun’s tone was lighthearted and sweet despite Chenle’s mood shift.
“Take care, Dejun,” Jaemin didn’t wave as they walked out and Chenle didn’t say anything at all.
“They call me antisocial but you don’t know how to be polite when it actually matters.” Jaemin immediately said once they were back in the car, opening the packet carefully to look at the corpse properly after being unraveled.
“What makes you say that?”
“You know exactly what, Zhong.”
“Whenever Jaemin called me by my last name it meant he was really at his point with me. We didn’t talk to each other for the rest of the day, Donghyeok noticed and offhandedly mentioned that it was his fault we were dysfunctional, I think that was the first thing that led to Jaemin slapping the fuck out of him. He did get everything he needed written down that day so, I guess me not talking his ear off was a plus.”
“So, what’re we doing today?” Jaemin had barely woken up when Chenle decided to show up to his apartment, his face scrunching up in response to the light from the sun.
He stared at him for a long moment before finally saying in a somewhat lost tone, “What’re we doing today?” Chenle only sighed, pushing himself past the door and grabbing Jaemin’s wrist as he did. Jaemin shut the door with his foot instinctively.
“You wrote down every missing person, I know you did because I watched you do it, Jaem.” Jaemin looked annoyed by the observation, scoffing as he moved into the kitchen. Chenle hated how unloved Jaemin’s apartment looked; if you had no clue, you’d never guess he’d lived rurally in his childhood. The only thing in the main two areas of the pristine home that showed he lived in it was the three framed photos laying face down in the living room. While Jaemin focused on the coffee machine, Chenle lifted one carefully and immediately took note of the floral shapes decorating it.
It showed Jaemin with his face pressed against another man’s, he looked the happiest Chenle had ever seen him. Almost every single tooth on display for the world to see. He could only assume it was Minhyung with him, considering the way he looked Jaemin like he lit up his world. Only an idiot wouldn’t be able to tell. Chenle set the golden frame down when he heard Jaemin moving again.
“I planned on goin’ to the piers, seein’ if anyone knows her then check if the name was on the list, try to find her people.” Jaemin spoke as he walked down the short hallway, Chenle following behind him. It was the most Chenle had ever heard his accent peek out.
“If that doesn’t work out?” Chenle purposefully avoided standing in the doorway of his bedroom, he didn’t want to be intrusive. Though the near silent shuffle of clothing made Chenle lick his lips like he was hungry, he almost felt bad because he had Jeno at home.
“Then fuck, Le, we’ll just have to visit everyone’s family in hopes of something.” Chenle flinched at how loud Jaemin put a hanger back in his closet. “I’m really hoping we don’t find another body before we find out who Jane Doe is.” Chenle missed his sleepy voice already, how it sounded more authentic and how it suited Jaemin in a way he wished he recognized.
“Obviously,” He whispered to himself, watching as Jaemin came out of his room in his usual black slacks, white button down, and black tie. He went straight to the kitchen and poured the entire coffee pot for himself and downed it nearly as fast.
“Just sit down, Le.” Then Jaemin was back down the hall to brush his teeth and slick his hair back, at least Chenle assumed. He took the opportunity to be nosy, looking at the shelf full of books. Psychology, not interesting. Anatomy, slightly more interesting. The books about true crime were the least interesting thing on the shelf, considering they worked it. Chenle didn’t understand the interest, but then again it was very Jaemin like to read on past serial killers to make connections with currents.
So very like him.
Chenle looked at another one of the face down photos after moving away from the books he had no interest in reading. This one was in a silver frame, nothing special. It only held a photo of Minhyung, leaning over a spread of Spider-Man comics with wide-frame glasses falling down his nose. It was clearly shot with so much love that Chenle put it down almost immediately. Perfect timing too since Jaemin was walking back down the hall, looking way more put together and notebook in hand.
“Let's go.” Jaemin didn’t wait up, heading out the door and expecting Chenle to just come. He did, even locked the door too.
“I hate that the transfer didn’t have any pictures for these names,” Jaemin huffed as he sat in the car, “I was up last night trying to remember if I had seen any of the faces before.”
“Suddenly it makes sense why you looked so exhausted.”
“I always look exhausted, Le.”
“Well, you’re handsome still.”
Jaemin glanced at him, then out the windshield, then back at him once more, then at his notebook sitting in his lap. It made him feel weird, maybe because he’d never expect Chenle to call him handsome. Jaemin always assumed Chenle was straight, as most would, mainly because he never said anything about men that would point to the desire. This was the first time Jaemin even heard him call another man handsome.
Jaemin wished it wasn’t him. He licked his teeth anxiously, “thanks.”
They went over the details of the body one more time, mainly just Jaemin going over it with Chenle humming agreement.
“The lungs at the scene hadn’t been her’s.”
By time they got to the piers, Jaemin was ready to be alone. “You stay here.”
“Stay here?”
“Yes, Chenle. Stay here, you don’t know how to be nice.”
“You’re still holding that against me?”
Jaemin was still holding how Chenle treated Dejun against him. He slammed the door uncharacteristically, clutching his notebook tight as he could as he approached the first person he saw. A beautiful person really, especially when they turned around. “Police?” Their voice was soft, almost like they’d hated to be caught like this. “I’m just watching the water, so you know.”
“Don’t worry, that’s not why I’m here,” Jaemin attempted to placate them as much as himself, free hand thumbing the cigarettes in his pocket.
“Then you want something?” They tilt their head, black waves moving along their forehead. They were really beautiful; white crop top with matching shorts and a sun stained blue fluffy coat. Jaemin wondered why they weren’t a model, he could easily imagine them in designer.
“Nothing like that either, I wanted to ask if you knew anyone who’d gone missing recently?” Jaemin opened up his notebook and immediately their eyes widened.
“It’s about the girl who’d been wound up, right?” Jaemin’s lack of an answer was enough to make them talk. “I’m not sure, I mean I’m here frequently and the only people I haven’t seen in a long time are Rosette and Candy.”
“Did either of them dye their hair?” Jaemin closed his eyes momentarily when neither of the names were on the list of missing people.
“I think Rosette did occasionally, I don’t pay the others too much attention.”
Jaemin bit back his disappointment, nodding as he pulled a card from his flatter pants pocket. “Call me if you see anything weird..?”
“Ten, and I will.”
“Thank you Ten, ask for detective Na.”
Ten only nodded in agreement before waving him off. Jaemin spent about twenty more minutes talking to the various people along the pier, and the only repeated name he got was a Rosette Compton. He learned Candy had been around recently as last night so that was a relief for him.
Rosette, even though she’d been missing for weeks, hadn’t been reported missing for the simple reason of her possibly not actually being missing. He heard she’d been with some rich man but Jaemin wouldn’t let go.
“I got a new name, but that also means we’d still have to meet everyone we need to find off the list.”
Chenle sighed quietly, looking more irritated than he had when Jaemin got in the car. “Where to first then?”
“Back home,” Jaemin sighed, “I’m not going house-to-house like a salesman, we’re going to see if we can find any missing persons logs first.” Which still grinded his gears that they hadn’t gotten in the first place. “I hope you say something to the transfer.”
“He’s a nice guy, Jaemin.”
“He can be nice and do a better job.”
“We did end up finding a list including pictures and descriptors. At the time, Walters wasn’t on Chenle’s list to give house calls since it claimed it’d been dropped, but I insisted we go meet her mother that day, then we’d go up NYC to see if we could find anything on Rosette.”
The home was warm like it was lived in and loved. Brown walls, the living room lined with pretty wallpaper, wooden floors. The tv played silently, reruns of Golden Girls. The kitchen smelled like coffee and the rest of the house smelled like cinnamon apples and cream. He felt welcomed because it felt familiar.
Mrs. Walters had brought them to the living room, ushering them to sit down on the couch. Chenle did with no hesitation, Jaemin politely declined with the shake of his head to keep his spot by the archway. Jaemin’s lithe fingers pull back the elastic holding the notebook closed, flipping to a new page and snatching his blue pen from his shirt pocket. He labeled the page ‘MRS. WALTERS’ before inhaling softly.
“When was the last time you saw your daughter?” Chenle was busy observing the living room because he didn't know how to be polite.
“About three weeks ago? She ran off with this man,” Jaemin already knew why the search had been dropped, “apparently the police found her and she said she didn’t want to come home. Since she’s an adult they can’t force her.” Her voice rounded with something sullen and disbelieving.
“Do you have any recent photos of her?” Chenle spoke before Jaemin could continue questioning.
With a quick nod, Mrs. Walters stood up and disappeared down the hall. Chenle leaned back to watch her walk into one of the rooms.
“You really think this is the one, Jaemin?” Chenle’s voice was hushed into a near silent whisper.
“If not, we’ll probably be expecting her soon.” Jaemin hated the thought of something so morbid, but it was the truth of his job. Jaemin fixed his posture as the woman walked back into the living room, a few polaroids in her hand.
“One of her photographer friends took these a few months ago.” She handed the photos over to Chenle, and if they were who they were looking for Jaemin couldn’t tell by the look on his face.
“Was her hair dyed before she left?” Jaemin just needed this answered before looking at the photos himself.
“No, she wasn’t into that kind of stuff.”
Jaemin really doubted that, running off with an unknown man and claiming to not want to come home does not read as prim to him.
“Here, Jaemin.” Chenle handed the pictures over carefully, like they were fine china. Jaemin knew it was their Jane Doe instantly. The first picture was enough; same round cheeks, thin lips, and naturally sharp brows. There were no obvious piercings, her hair was brown, and her skin wasn’t sickly pale. Jaemin wouldn’t mention their findings to Mrs. Walters, he’d keep to himself for now as he handed the photos over.
“Your daughter is dead.”
“I wanted to kill him.” Jaemin lights up another cigarette, fighting against how his thumb and middle finger wants to crush the filter. “He did it so suddenly with a tone that sounded like he didn’t care that he was telling Mrs. Walters her daughter was dead.” Jaemin stares into the ashtray, eyes turning a bit glossy before he blinks it away. “I think it was the first time I felt like I actually hated Chenle.”
“Why would you just say that?” Jaemin had felt all of his hair stand when the older woman began sobbing in front of them, like a fear struck cat. And now that they were in the car, he still hadn’t relaxed his grip on his notebook.
“Because, it was the honest thing to do,” the correct thing to do since they knew it was Ruby Walters now, “it’s better to nip it in the bud.”
“Right.” Jaemin still hadn’t relaxed. He hated just how sudden Chenle had been, it made him sick regardless how well he’d been able to comfort her while Jaemin stood there trying to gather his wits again.
Chenle reversed out of the driveway in that same impressively clear way he always did, but Jaemin didn’t have the slightest interest in making a smartmouth remark. He focused on the neighborhood homes they passed, the dull colors, the occasional playset in the yard, someone washing their car.
His fingers relaxed, idly tapping against the black leather of the notebook. He licked his teeth, pressing his tongue against the sharp edge of his canine in hopes of slicing the muscle open, draw him away from the deja vu he was feeling.
He missed Minhyung and the rough of his hands, how he’d sweetly coo at any sliver of petulance on his face. How he’d scold him for being hung up on past instances. He’d hated that Jaemin hadn’t moved on and Jaemin knew it better than anyone.
The world kept spinning.
The two of them kept quiet for the rest of the ride back to the department. Jaemin kept anxiously licking his teeth. Chenle tugged at his bottom lip in a silent punishment.
“Jaemin was cold for the next few days after that. We still worked, of course, but he wouldn’t indulge me in bickering, he wouldn’t steal sips of my coffee, he wouldn’t look at me if he didn’t have to. It wasn’t very often that gossip got to Johnny, but that time it did, of course it did.” Chenle’s brows furrowed deeply at the thought, “It’s funny because he seemed so ready to get rid of Jaemin.”
“Hey Johnny,” Chenle hummed as he shut the door behind him, immediately leaning back against it.
“Are you two actually working on the case?” Well, that was straight to the point. “Should I hand it to Renjun and Donghyeok?”
“Woah,” Chenle chuckled anxiously, he was not giving up his hard work, Jaemin’s hard work, “what makes you ask that?”
“I’m told you and Na aren’t getting along.” Chenle wouldn’t go that far, just a little disagreement.
“Nah, uhm,” he swallowed to give himself a chance to think it over, “he’s just dealing with something right now and you know Jaemin, he’s a workaholic. He wouldn’t skip work for his own funeral.”
Which was true, so clearly true. Anyone who paid attention to Jaemin Na would see it.
Johnny hummed to himself in thought, looking at his landline before looking back up at Chenle. “I could get him transferred back to Narcotics.”
Chenle felt sick at the thought of losing Jaemin like that, because he kept fucking up their flow while Jaemin did his best to smooth sail. “Nah, seriously Johnny, we’ll get straightened out. Don’t even worry about it.”
“You better, Chenle.” Chenle took his out as soon as it was given to him, immediately returning to his desk beside Jaemin.
They sit in silence for a little while, Jaemin writing down similarities between the currently missing young women to see if anything could draw them closer to the killer.
“Jaemin, I’m sorry.”
Blue ink stopped spreading gorgeous lettering onto the lined paper, Jaemin looked up at him like he was insane. Right as his lips parted to speak, Chenle beat him to it. “I won’t do things before discussing them with you first and I’m sorry for every other time I have.” The softness of his tone threw himself off just as much as Jaemin.
A small look of confusion crossed his fatigued face before a small look akin to relief replaced it. “Good, you’re too damn rowdy, you know that?”
Chenle could only assume it was starting to kill Jaemin too, but he wasn’t gonna cave. That just wasn’t like him, he wouldn’t seek apologies people didn’t want to give. “Yeah, I know, Jaem.”
“We gotta follow up on the Rosette Compton situation.”
“You want me to search, don’t you?”
“Don’t ask stupid questions, we’re not in high school, Le.”
Right.
He pushed himself away from his desk, petting Jaemin’s shoulder as he walked away to Jisung’s desk. Yangyang usually sat beside him, but today he was out of town. He knocked against the wood, making Jisung look up in a manner that was all too familiar; past his brows where his prescription frames failed to help. It stirred that same desire he had felt since they’d met.
“Come help me look through the missing persons.” Chenle didn’t ask, he demanded, as Jisung’s superior.
“Can you give me a second?” Jisung gestured to the crossword he’d been working through since he wasn’t busy. Only one question was left.
An eight letter word for curl.
“It’s volution. Let's go, Jisung.”
Jisung huffed, frustratedly writing ‘volution’ in his incoherent writing before standing up. He waved his hand for Chenle to lead the way, and he fell into step behind him once he started walking. Chenle loved it, how he followed even when he was irritated with him.
Chenle thought of him like a needy puppy.
When they got to the record room, Chenle gestured for him to lead and with a sigh Jisung stepped in front of him. He led them directly to the cabinets with the reports, opening the drawer for Chenle.
“Can you look for the Compton report for me?” He pressed his palm against Jisung’s lower back, making him shiver before moving to flip through the C’s. Chenle let his pinky slip beneath the hem of his slacks, enjoying the way Jisung turned taffy pink as he moved his hand lower.
“I think it’s normal for people to decompress. And I didn’t think that’d be fair to my wife to use her for decompression. I love Jeno too much, she deserved better than to be used like that.”
Chenle pressed his lips into Jisung’s as soon as he opened the door, making him gasp like he hadn’t expected it. He could taste the stab of vodka on his lip when he pulled it between his teeth. Jisung reached to push the door shut as Chenle kicked it shut, clutching his hips to make him halt. When they pulled apart, Jisung already looked riddled with that same embarrassment he always had.
“I missed this,” Chenle murmured like the secret it was, fingers slipping underneath Jisung’s shirt by the collar. The feeling of his shoulders and collarbones were like blades.
“You just saw me a few hours ago, Chenle.”
“Don’t remind me, Jisung, let's pretend it's been days.” For him it might as well had been, too busy with work, too busy with Jaemin, too busy drinking cheap whiskey in his living room to sleep.
“Chenle,” Jisung’s lips formed a small frown like he ate something sour, Chenle wanted to bite them again, “we really have to stop doing this.”
He expected that, he’d be a fool to believe that the reason Jisung’s been avoiding him wasn’t over this. He knew that the guilt of knowing Chenle fisted his hair with a wedding band on his ring finger would weigh on him soon. Chenle just hoped it wouldn’t.
“We don’t have to, I’ll take the ring off for you if you want.”
Jisung looked away, not yet pushing away Chenle’s wandering hands. His sullen look deepened when his cheeks were caressed, Chenle physical doting was done with the skillfulness of someone in love. “That’s not the point, you have a wife, Chenle.” Finally he pushed Chenle away, and even when he didn’t deserve it, Jisung was still gentle when he put distance between them.
Chenle didn’t bother forcing himself back into his space, but he couldn’t help but feel a little frustrated. They’d been doing this for months, and only now he wanted to put a stop to it.
“Really?”
“Yeah, really.”
It was better, Chenle supposed, with his love for Jeno and envy for a dead man this was probably the best course of action. He stared at Jisung for a moment longer, taking in how his guilt manifested in glassy eyes and a trembling lip. Chenle didn’t say goodbye when he left, he didn’t bother to look back either. He didn’t want to see if he started to cry or not, he just needed to go home.
“I had went back to the piers, just to see if I could catch anyone new. More people tended to come out during the night. It would be more effective than a daytime visit, then I visited a bar.” Jaemin paused for a moment, staring into his empty box of cigarettes. “I can’t keep talking until I get more Marlboros,” he tossed the empty box onto the table. Special Blend Red 100s.
“We already said you can’t smoke in here.”
“You can’t seriously decide to cut me off now,” Jaemin pulled a twenty out of his pocket before tossing it on the table, “just get me the cigarettes.”
This time Jaemin didn’t drink but he did approach two women off to the side of the entrance, covered in boas and skimpy shorts despite the chill of the night. They looked mildly disturbed by his arrival, he pulled out his badge almost immediately, “I want to talk to you about someone.”
“We don’t know anyone.” The brunette answered defensively.
“I look for killers, I’m not interested in arresting you for anything else.” He took the silence as an opportunity to continue. “Do either of you know a Rosette?”
“Oh, the chick that’s been missing for some time now?”
“So, I’ve been told. Do you know if she has any next of kin?”
There’s a silence that took the two of them while Jaemin opened up his notebook. “Oh, yeah, yeah.. She has a sister that lives in Orange County, I believe.” That was perfect for him, he didn’t have any other plans than finding something new about Rosette. He was hoping that she wouldn’t be another body, and this would help him in the conclusion.
“Can I get your names?”
“Marina, this is Summer.” The brunette nodded towards her friend who still hadn’t talked.
Jaemin hummed to himself, closing his notebook and digging into his pockets to fist out forty dollars. “Summer, go buy us a beer and whatever the two of you drink.” She looked at him confused before taking the money and walking inside.
Jaemin immediately leaned against the wall beside Marina, inhaling his exhaustion and relaxing his face. “Where do you get drugs?”
“What makes you ask?” Again, she looked as if he was untrustworthy.
“I need barbiturates.”
“Why not something like PCP?”
“I need to sleep, that’s all.”
She pulled her glossy lip between her teeth in a smile, nodding before leaning in to whisper to him. She pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before pulling back, Jaemin didn’t react besides bowing his head in appreciation before disappearing for the night.
“I also went to get sleep aid that night too. The pharmacist was way too chatty.”
“You can pay in another way.” Jaemin clutched his bills tight at the thought, a swell of discomfort settling in his chest.
“You deserve more respect than that.” Even with her short cut and sun tanned skin, pretty as hell, he couldn’t stomach the idea of sex right now.
“Well, I only suggested it because I think you look good.”
Jaemin sighed softly, shaking his head as he handed over the money. “Then, I just.. I don’t have sex.”
She exchanged the twenties for a pill bottle with the label snatched off. Jaemin slid it into the inside of his jacket while she looked him up and down. “You’re too good looking to not have sex.”
“So I’m told. Have a good night, take care.” He bowed his head slightly before making his way back to his car, ignoring the nasty feeling growing past his ribs. Even with dodging advances, Jaemin found himself feeling guilty as he swallowed two of the pills dry.
“We did end up finding Rosette’s people a few days later,” Chenle exhales like it hurts, “led us to another farm. Only after talking to a whole neighborhood of people.”
Jaemin squinted as they drove up to the sun washed house, no animals in sight nor crops. He wondered how they considered it a farm when there wasn’t much of a visual indication of such. “You’re talking today.” He murmured softly, tongue pushing against the back of his teeth.
“You trust me to talk again?”
“You apologized.”
Chenle quickly perked up at that, like the notion was what he’d been waiting to hear. The smile on his face was hard to miss considering he basically glowed.
When the car came to a stop, Jaemin let Chenle get out of the car first to sip his half finished coffee before following. He glanced to the backyard before stepping onto the porch. He opened his notebook ahead of time, flipping to the page where he’d written about Ruby Walters and labeled beneath it ‘COMPTON.’
Chenle knocked on the door with a loose fist, a small “coming!” filtered through the door before it opened to reveal an older man. His short hair was mostly grey, eyes a deep black and he smelled thickly of tobacco. Stress smoking, Jaemin guessed.
“Hello, we’re detective Zhong and Na,” Chenle pulled out his badge to show in a soothing manner, “we wanted to ask about your daughter.”
“She hasn’t been home.” Mr. Compton almost said it bitterly.
“That’s exactly why we’re here, Mr. Compton. May we come in?” Jaemin underestimated how mannered Chenle could be, maybe he should get mad at him more.
Mr. Compton allowed them in with a huff, “I don’t know what you expect to find out.”
The house was cold with something left behind. A tv played faintly in the back, Gunsmoke, Jaemin assumed. The walls were a sun washed blue like the curtains used to always be open and it was open through the use of archways. Jaemin didn’t follow Chenle into the living room immediately, wandering to an opposite entrance.
“When was the last time you saw Rosette?” Jaemin tugged the top off his pen as Chenle asked questions.
“Three years ago. She left to whore herself out since she didn’t want to work on the farm or go to school.” Mr. Compton spoke bitterly as the ripped up pictures in frames. Jaemin noted how, who he assumed was, Rosette had been taken out of every familial photo scattered about the home.
“Did you know she was missing?”
“No, and I don’t care.” That made Jaemin’s mouth sour, he couldn’t imagine hating his child enough to not care about them being missing.
“Do you have any pictures of her then?” Chenle was clearly biting back frustration when he spoke, “we just need to be able to identify her if we see her.”
Mr. Compton scoffed as Jaemin entered the living room, still writing what he noticed. He only looked up to gaze out the window behind Mr. Compton. Trees, forestry. He felt a tug to go.
“I’ll get them if you’re done asking about her.”
“We are, Mr. Compton.”
Jaemin felt Chenle’s eyes on his back as he slunk away, walking out the backdoor before the two of them followed behind a few moments later. He drowned their conversation out. The woods were calling to him, like a familiar whisper, so he followed.
“Where the hell are you going, Jaemin?!” Chenle was quick to follow, pressing his hands in an apology to Mr. Compton. He had full intentions to properly apologize when they got back.
Jaemin set his index finger between the pages to keep his spot, using the notebook to move the branches from his face as he followed the slight clearing of a path. He hated the way his chest felt close to caving the more he walked forward.
Then it sank. Jaemin felt like his breath had been tugged out of his lung roughly with a fishing hook. He never thought that it'd be worse, way worse then what they’d already seen. Chenle’s grumbling came to a sudden halt when he made it beside him, staring at the scene in an uncharacteristic silence.
“Jisung had called in sick that day after I visited him, then he hadn’t shown for the next few days. Renjun mentioned that it could’ve easily been the flu or a cold since fall was finally here. I should’ve known otherwise.”
A large oak tree with several spines strung up like Christmas ornaments, they were various sizes and bound into tight spirals. At first glance they all looked human, from varying ages. It made Jaemin’s stomach churn and knot itself tight. He couldn’t afford to be sick right now, he had to keep it together. He had to ignore that familiar burn of bile that curled in his pharynx.
“Jisung.” Chenle spoke finally, acknowledging what Jaemin had been trying his hardest to ignore. The truth was undeniable, despite what he did to omit it from his thoughts.
It was almost artistic how Jisung was curled into something fetal beneath the tree. His eyes closed into something peaceful as if this ending is what he needed to be okay, free. His lips forced into pout of some kind, and the waistband of his violet sleep pants stained magenta by his own blood.
Jaemin almost felt hopeless from the sight.