Work Text:
Solus waited eagerly in front of the oil house she’d chosen for her and Megatronus’ date night. As much as all the Primes loved Maccadam’s, Solus fancied a change of scenery, something Alchemist took no offence to.
Being a Prime, Solus naturally drew a lot of looks from passersby. Some greeted her, which she gladly returned, so wanted to pray to her, which she awkwardly asked them not to do, and the most daring tried to hit on her, which she most certainly did not tolerate. There was only one love of her life, and he was running late.
Booming footsteps echoed across the narrow street. The crowd cleared, some staring in awe at the tall, dark bot whose insides were perpetually aflame. People knew better than to get in Megatronus Prime’s way, for he was the embodiment of war.
“Megatronus!” Solus eagerly rushed forward and embraced the bot more than twice her size. Sure, to most he was an intimidating embodiment of the concept of war, but to Solus he was her precious sweetheart with whom she wanted to spend eternity.
“Solus, my beloved.” Megatronus returned the embrace, "I apologise for being late. Shall we dine?”
“Yes, let’s not waste any more time!” Solus excitedly grabbed Megatronus’ hand and dragged him inside with the herculean strength only a wielder of the mightiest forge in the universe could possess.
The inside of the establishment was rather classy, with the walls painted a resplendent gold highlighted by burgundy accents. Cloths depicting various cyberglyphs representing each of the Primes hung by the wall, and upon closer inspection it would seem that the material was imported from organic planets.
Solus and Megatronus took a seat at their reserved table, sitting opposite each other. Solus put her head in her hands and stared lovingly at her Conjunx Endura.
“So?” She started.
“So?”
“Why were you late this time?” Solus wasn’t upset about Megatronus being late. She knew he was easily sidetracked, and the stories he told her, whether they were real or fabricated, were always extremely amusing. Her favourite one was when Megatronus somehow ended up in a theatre, where he somehow managed to ruin the entire play yet received a standing ovation because he just so happened to follow the play’s script in doing so.
“Uhm… well, you see…” Megatronus took a moment to think. Which was unusual, since he usually got right into the story. “There was this… Corvicon, and-”
Before Megatronus could keep going, the waiter arrived to take the couple’s orders.
“I’ll have a barrel of benzine with a large helping of kerosene and diesel, please.” Solus ordered something heavy, which most bots her size would blanche at.
“I demand petroleum. Raw.” Megatronus’ growling voice resonated in the furnace of his interior. As the waiter walked away after jotting down their orders, Megatronus saw Solus staring at him with an unamused look.
“Really, Amalgamous?” She raised a brow.
“What do you mean? I’m Megatronus, my love.”
“Ok, well, firstly, Megatronus never wastes time telling why he was late. Secondly, he prefers letting me order for him. And finally, Megatronus loathes raw petroleum.” Solus raised a finger as she listed off each point.
‘Megatronus’ sat still for a moment before the actual Megatronus burst through the door, his cooling vents proving their own redundancy as flames licked the exterior of his frame.
“I…Sorry I’m late, supernova, there was a Corvicon-” Megatronus lifted his gaze to find himself already on a date with Solus.
The Megatronus who sat at the table stood up, and transformed. Except, instead of turning into a tank, he folded and shifted in illogical and physically impossible ways to become an odd, four-armed robot with a hunched posture and a single optic in place of a face.
“AT-LEAST-I-GOT-YOU-BETTER-THAN-LAST-TIME-HEH-HEH-HEH.” Amalgamous taunted with his primitive voicebox. Of course, he could give himself a more advanced voicebox if he so chose, he just chose not to.
Megatronus glowered at the infinite-changer and took a step forward. Amalgamous flinched and raised all four of his hands.
“WOAH-THERE-BUDDY! CAN’T-I-MAKE-IT-UP-TO-YOU?”
Megatronus took another step forward. As amusing as the ensuing chaos would be, Solus decided she didn’t want to cause a scene in public. At least, no more than they already have.
“How about this: Amalgamous, you go and change Megatronus’ order to something lighter, say… a nitrogen and nickel solution?” Megatronus nodded in confirmation, “and Megatronus doesn’t beat you to an ore. Deal?”
“DEAL!” Amalgamous rushed to the kitchen while the real Megatronus sat at his seat.
“Where was I?” Having had the chance to cool down, Megatronus was no longer aflame.
“There was a Corvicon.”
“Right! So this Corvicon…”