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The bedroom lights were low and warm, throwing a soft glow across the hardwood floor. Outside the large windows, the city far below murmured faintly in the background. Guan Shan was already in bed, one arm propped behind his head and the other holding a paperback angled just right under the bedside lamp. The blanket was pulled up to his chest. He looked settled, comfortable. Relaxed after a long day of exhausting work and a hot shower.
He Tian lingered in the doorway for a second, watching him with a soft contentedness. Sometimes he still convinced himself that if he blinked or looked away too fast it all might disappear.
“Don’t stay up too late with your murder book,” he said as he padded across the room, tugging his shirt off on the way.
“It’s not a murder book,” Guan Shan muttered without looking up.
He Tian dropped the shirt onto the nearby chair, the one that had slowly become the designated clothes that aren't clean but aren’t dirty chair, and kicked off his sweats. The air was cool against his skin, but the heater was running, and Guan Shan’s side of the bed looked warm enough to risk it.
As he pulled back the blanket and slid under, his cold toes brushed against Guan Shan’s leg. “Hey,” he said, grinning, even before the protest came.
"You're freezing," Guan Shan grumbled, but he made no move to escape.
"You're warm," He Tian said, nudging closer, shameless. "Problem solves itself."
"You could solve it without using me as a human radiator."
"That’s not as fun." He Tian pressed in, arm wrapping loosely around Guan Shan’s waist, cheek settling in the space between shoulder blades like he’d claimed the spot. Guan Shan exhaled but didn’t move the book.
"What are you even reading?"
"‘Crime and Punishment.’"
He Tian snorted. "That’s your idea of light bedtime reading?"
"It's comforting," Guan Shan said, turning a page. "Makes me feel morally superior."
He Tian hummed, pressing a smile against his skin. "I like this version of you. So studious. And warm."
"You like any version that lets you cop a feel without getting punched."
A pause. Then softer, "I like every version."
That broke Guan Shan’s concentration, finally dropping the book just an inch. He Tian didn’t say it like a big declaration, he said it like it was just the truth. A plain fact. He was still getting used to the casualness of it all.
"...Yeah?" Guan Shan asked, voice low.
"Yeah," He Tian said, already closing his eyes. "Now put the book away."
Guan Shan didn’t answer at first. He just stared down at the page, words blurring into a meaningless block. He Tian’s breath was steady against his back. He felt the warmth bloom in his chest before he could stop it. Predictable and inevitable.
He tried to go on a little longer, not wanting to give in just yet. He kept his eyes on the page but after five minutes of not reading a single sentence, he finally gave up.
He Tian’s arm was warm around his middle, palm resting flat on his skin like he was anchoring him to his side. He felt the soft brush of He Tian’s thumb over his shirt, just above the hem of his sweatpants moving in lazy, back-and-forth movements. Thoughtless, probably. But it made his stomach flutter anyway.
With a quiet sigh, he closed the book and set it down on the nightstand. The soft thunk felt louder than it was. The click of the lamp being turned off followed a moment later. He shifted, rolling onto his back. He Tian didn’t move much, just adjusted so their bodies lined up naturally.
Guan Shan lifted the edge of the blanket and then pulled it back around them both. His hands, cold from being out in the open, landed lightly on He Tian’s wrist first, then slid up along the curve of his forearm. The skin was warm. Solid. Familiar.
“Your hands are freezing,” He Tian murmured, eyes half-lidded now. Still smiling.
“Shut up,” Guan Shan said, but he curled in anyway, nosing at the edge of He Tian’s jaw before letting their foreheads touch. His hand found its way around He Tian’s waist, settling at the dip of his spine. “You started it.”
He Tian shifted closer, tucking his face into the side of Guan Shan’s neck. His breath was hot, his lips soft against his skin. He brushed a kiss there, just a ghost of pressure, then another, a little lower. His fingertips smoothed circles over Guan Shan’s ribs beneath his shirt, slow and easy, like memorizing something he already knew.
Guan Shan swallowed. “You do that shit on purpose,” he said, voice low.
“Mhm,” He Tian breathed, lips grazing collarbone now. “What gave me away?”
“You think I’m gonna beg to be held or something?”
“No,” He Tian said. He kissed just under his throat. “I think you already are.”
Guan Shan’s eyes fluttered shut. His hand tightened slightly on He Tian’s back, grounding himself. He opened his mouth, probably to deflect, to bite, but what came out instead was, “Don’t stop.”
He Tian paused, just long enough to gloat in that, then kept going. His mouth was warm, hands reverent. He nudged his thigh between Guan Shan’s legs, not suggestive, just there, like another point of contact. Like he couldn’t get close enough.
Guan Shan could feel the smug satisfaction radiating off him like a second blanket. “Don’t get cocky,” he muttered. “You’re lucky I’m too tired to fight you off.”
He Tian smiled, eyes still closed. “I knew you’d cave.”
“Shut up,” he said stubbornly but breathed him in all the same. The scent of clean skin, laundry detergent, and remnants of cologne was so comforting. All these little things he’d come to recognize and crave.
He felt fingers curl gently at the back of his neck and into his hair, movement like muscle memory, like home.
They stayed like that for a long while, the silence only broken by the hum of the heater and the shift of fabric as He Tian thumbed slow, lazy patterns against his skin.
“Still feeling morally superior?” He Tian murmured, voice barely above a whisper.
Guan Shan huffed a soft laugh against his chest. “Yeah,” he said. “I got you, didn’t I?”
He Tian didn’t answer right away. Just leaned down and pressed his mouth to Guan Shan’s hair, not quite a kiss, not quite not.
“Yeah,” he said. “You did.”