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"I'll defend, honor, and serve Lady Yuki 'til the day I die!" Ayano barked, in a manner completely different from her usually silent, air-like demeanor.
"Oh, then why did you betray her and also me?" Nonoa smugly said.
"Shut up! I don't even know how I could have betrayed you, because the writer of this slop hasn't read past volume 5," Ayano barked once more. She began rolling up her sleeve before slapping and pulling on Nonoa's hair.
"Grrr, I hope you enjoy this, you bit—"
Nonoa quickly retaliated by pulling Ayano's eyes out of her sockets and chewing on them as if they were gumballs. Unlike gumballs, however, she quickly spat them out. This gave Ayano the perfect chance to get them back, but Nonoa grabbed Ayano and began choking her.
Even while being choked, Ayano kicked Nonoa, then pulled a sword out of her ahoge and used it to cut Nonoa into a million little pieces. Those little pieces, however, came together to form a fist and punched her just before Nonoa reassembled.
"How did you do that?" Ayano coughed.
"When you make out with so many baseball players, it just becomes a common habit."
Ayano breathed in and out before she began stretching. She grabbed a radio and started playing the song "Tell It to My Heart."
"Are you giving up and going to dance your pain away?" Nonoa laughed before she started screaming, as thousands of worms entered the classroom.
"Wormies... Assemble and kick Nonoa's ass!" Ayano shouted.
The worms formed a fist and punched Nonoa across the room. She gasped for air before drinking from a metal bottle of water. Once done, she threw it at Ayano, but Ayano stepped out of the way, which resulted in the bottle hitting Andou.
"Before you say anything, Ayano, just know he deserves it a hundred times over."
"No, you're right. He did deserve that, just like how you deserve this!" Ayano shouted while running up to Nonoa. She cut off Nonoa's right arm and used it to slap her. Nonoa started ducking before cutting off her own left arm and began slapping Ayano with it.
They each received a few painful slaps to the face but fought onward, ignoring the pain. When Nonoa was distracted, Ayano pulled out her Nintendo Switch and started playing *Senran Kagura Peach Ball*. She got into a level and played with the Joy-Cons detached, which led to her "accidentally" hitting Nonoa.
Nonoa let out a scream, grabbed the console, and threw it at Ayano's face, bringing her to the ground. Nonoa, however, was flashbanged by the game's fan service, which they had triggered by throwing the controllers. This made the console think they were legitimately playing the game and not trying to kill each other.
The fan service scene was of the character Ryona getting some ice cream stuck between her— oh, wait, Ayano was getting up. She flipped Nonoa off while making a very dubious grin. Nonoa struck back by flipping her off, too.
Ayano snapped her fingers, and suddenly she and Nonoa were dropped into a cement pit at a construction site. They pulled each other's hair and tugged on each other's school uniforms, but suddenly the sky turned dark.
Sayaka pulled a lever that caused cement to fall on both Ayano and Nonoa. It's safe to say she won the battle by pulling a lever and cementing her non-existent competition.
Eventually, Ayano and Nonoa got unstuck from the cement, but once they were free, they both started hyper-fixating on rock music and skateboards. It's 3 a.m. I don't fucking know how to end this, I guess I wanna marry Ayame Kajou or something.