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Siegfried was moping. In the worst kind of ways. The last week hadn't been kind to him, and earlier that afternoon things had just become worse.
Rain, fog, mud. Everywhere. It was the darkest November mankind had ever seen and the bleakness that had arrived with the dark season had crept straight into his heart. But it wasn't just a fall depression like any other. It was the sense of loss that really got to him and made his heart heavy. As he hoovered over his whisky like a fortune teller would stared into their tea leaves, wondering how much he had to drink before the alcohol could outweigh the darkness, he remembered what had brought him here on a Saturday afternoon.
It was her. Always her.
Dark hair, bright eyes, cheekbones so sharp they could cut glass.
He saw her in front of his inner eye as she teased him for being daft, before she turned away and walked away from him.
The Drovers was half empty, not yet pestered with the smell of alcohol and tobacco. Maggie knew better than to disturb him while he nursed his second drink, contemplating whether he should go home or just vanish from the face of the earth.
Vonolel, his beloved rat had died five days ago. As a vet he was too aware of the short lifespan of rodents, but Vonolel had been a very tough one of his kind. He had been over three, almost four years old, which was quite an accomplishment for a rat.
Being a real Methusalem, Siegfried had even believed him to be immortal, but then the old rat had suddenly passed in his sleep. Siegfried had found his loyal companion in the morning when he wanted to check on him. Logically he knew he should be more grateful for having the honour to care for him and less sad for the loss, but Vonolel's death had hit him harder than he had anticipated. It felt as if he had been losing his dear friend Maurice and Vonolel, the horse, all over again.
Mrs Hall, God bless her beautiful soul, had tried to console him with his favourite meal and by distracting him with board games, but as much as he appreciated her efforts, they had become fruitless once he had come to the realisation that he was losing her too. Not to death, but to another parasite.
It had began the day after when Joe bloody Coney had been sitting in his kitchen when Siegfried had come home from a farm call. He had heard strange noises from the inside when he had taken off his boots to leave them outside. Once he had entered his house Joe had been innocently stirring in a cup of tea while Mrs Hall had been standing by the sink, looking flushed - and dare he say it? - glowing as if she had just received her first proper shag in ages. Her hand had been lying on her chest, holding the gap of her pinny together and she had stammered something about tea and biscuits.
He had wanted to die on the spot. From embarrassment and a broken heart.
That was the day he had started to consider Joe the enemy. He couldn't believe Mrs Hall could fall for such a lousy drifter, but maybe her experience with the wet lettuce Gerald Hammond had led her to the conclusion that she wanted to try her luck with a handsome bastard who gambled and dealt with pets of all sorts to make a living.
He reckoned it wasn't entirely unheard of that some women liked a gruff guy - not even when her name was Audrey Hall and he considered her a saint. But shagging this savage in his kitchen wasn't an action he could sanction. If anyone should have the privilege it was him, but apparently she didn't consider him worthy of such delights.
On the contrary, for tonight she had told him that she would meet up with some WI ladies and had prepared some cold dinner for him that was waiting in the pantry - with his favourite ale and a piece of cake for desert. Cold dinner, no board game, no nightcap. And her bad conscience was feeding him with cake and ale.
As much as he admired the Women's Institute and their members he didn't believe for a second that they would meet on a Saturday night to talk over the next community tea party.
It was clear as daylight: Audrey Hall had a date with Joe Coney.
As his frustration grew, he downed his whisky and instantly ordered another one.
"My, my, what's eating at you?" Maggie asked as she collected the coins he slammed on top of the bar.
"Nothing."
"Was the biggest lie ever told," she replied with a twinkle in her eye and handed him the whisky. "I'm a good listener," she offered but he shook his head. In his eyes Maggie was only a child, not innocent but too young to understand how his old bruised heart skipped several beats every time he thought of his housekeeper and a notorious gambler with a soft spot for rodents. "I appreciate the sentiment, but it's…" He didn't even know how to describe his emotional state and settled for the whisky to be his sounding board.
Whisky understood. Whisky didn't ask questions.
When the door opened and Joe came in, he groaned. Was there no place where he was safe? His unruly curse made Maggie chuckle. "Language, Siegfried. Audrey wouldn't approve."
He scoffed. If Maggie only knew what Mrs Hall approved of. With a side glance he scrutinised Joe and the ferret on his shoulder. It was a beautiful animal, very clean and with clever eyes. To his dismay the same qualities applied to Joe who seemed to have taken a bath. His scruff looked strangely tidy and there was this hint of soap that filled the air.
Siegfried's mood sank faster than the Titanic as he settled behind the table, hiding from the world and Joe especially. Of course he would groom himself like a greedy cat with the prospect of shagging the most beautiful woman in the whole of Darrowby.
A couple of minutes later, the door to the pub opened again, and the object of his desire came in. Siegfried almost choked on his drink when he saw Audrey Hall crossing the parlour, heading for Joe's table. In her nice new dress and her curly hair, she looked lovely to say the least. Every muscles in his body stiffened when he saw her dropping on the chair next to Joe, a bright smile playing around her lips. He wasn't ready for this. Not again. Not ever again.
His eyes widened in fear when Joe said something to her and she turned her head. But she had already spotted him and seemed equally surprised to see him. And she blushed. Considerably. Crimson was the colour that came to his mind as he raised his glass to greet her.
Her fierce reaction only proved that she was dating Joe and didn't want Siegfried to know. Well, she was allowed a life outside the house, and he understood her wish to keep a potential…suitor a secret. As a divorced woman and black out warden she had a reputation to lose.
She shyly waved back and whispered something into Joe's ear, before she rose. Siegfried shifted in his seat when she strolled over to his table. "I didn't know you were here," she said. "Tris were looking for you earlier. We thought you were dealing with an emergency"
"Just taking a break," he mumbled, clinging to his drink. This was what he considered an emergency. Audrey Hall having a date with another man an emergancy of epic proportions.
"I see…are you sure? You look…tense." She placed her hand on his forearm, the touch setting him on fire.
"I'm perfectly fine, Mrs Hall…enjoy your…" He couldn't even say it. "Evening off." She didn't miss the angry glare he shot at Joe and delicately licked her lips. "It were just a coincidence that we met here," she said, her voice low. "Maggie called earlier. She's got something for me…" She cleared her throat. The lie was written all over her beautiful face and they both knew her attempt to fool him was in vain. Ten years under the same roof had taught them enough about the other to know when one of them avoided the truth. "I'll see you later…when I'm back from me meeting…"
"Of course…" He firmly avoided her eyes while she gave him a smile he couldn't read. Was it pity? Most likely.
"Mr Farnon, I…"
"It's fine. Go on, have some fun." He waved her concern, her well-meant intentions of protecting his feelings, aside like a nasty fly.
A big aghast, she stood there, but he didn't know how to face her without losing his composure. Her disappointment was palpable as she turned away and went to the bar to speak to Maggie. A minute later when he finally looked up again, Audrey and Joe were gone. Crestfallen he downed his drink and continued to pity himself.
~~~~A&S~~~~
Sure to have the house for himself Siegfried entered the kitchen through the backdoor about an hour later. Not even the dogs were excited about his return as they remained in their basket curled up and unimpressed.
"Traitors," he mumbled as he walked through. The living room was as empty as the rest of the ground floor and he listlessly took off his jacket, uncaring that it slipped off the hook. He passed his study, the one room he couldn't be in since Vonolel had died to head upstairs, but it was the strange rattling of straw and metal that startled him.
The cage was empty. Deserted. Vacated. His brain, his grieving heart must fool him. Surely. He shook his head, ready to go up. Then he heard it again and stopped. His heart was beating wildly in his chest as he dared to step inside his den for the first time in five days.
The squeaking of the little rodent in the cage reached his ear and he stormed towards the cage and picked it up. The little rat's fur was white, black, and brown. Not quite like Vonolel's, but a beauty nevertheless. Curiously the small one sniffed at Siegfried's thumb as he pushed it through the grid. "Hello there," Siegfried greeted his new companion. Tears welled up in his eyes as a result his vision became blurry. he must be dreaming this!
"I thought we could name him Maurice…" Her voice sounded softer than he had heard it in a long time. Moved he turned around, saw her standing in the doorway, all happy, all smily.
"But…"
"It were Joe…after you lost Vonolel I asked him to help me to find a new rat. He were so kind as to organise one."
Siegfried looked from the friendly tiny face behind the grid to her and back. She wouldn't…she couldn't stand rats.
"You asked him to…you…you didn't date him?"
She chuckled. "Of course not. You're so daft, jumping to the worst conclusions…" Exasperated and under tears she shook her head and moved towards him. "Ain't he…cute, I guess?" She wondered as she smiled at the rat who was excitedly inspected his new home.
"He's perfect," Siegfried agreed. Then he put the cage back in its place and turned to her. "You're perfect." He said and when she closed the last couple of inches that separated them, he cupped her face with both of his hands. Her eyes glittered and her flushed face beamed at him as he touched her cheekbones as if he were examining a rare piece of art.
"He were already here when you came back home the other day," she whispered. "I know you were thinking the worst of me, but I wanted it to be a surprise…the rat were hiding beneath me pinny," she broke off half chuckling, half sobbing.
"I was only thinking that I couldn't bear to lose you," Siegfried admitted teary-eyed. "That's the worst for me. Nothing else."
"So, we'll keep him?" She asked, her eyes lashes bat down.
"Of course we will," he replied. "And will you forgive me for being…a daft old man?"
"Only if you kiss me…like you thought I were kissing Joe…" The dare came with a smirk and he was only too happy to oblige. Since he had never hoped to kiss her, he had never really dared to envision their first kiss, and now that it happened the weight simply tumbled from his shoulders. His heart echoed wildly in his ears as he ferventy kissed her with everything he had to give. Something crashed to the floor as he manouevred her against the wall next to his desk and when they were both breathless, he buried his face in her hair and inhaled her scent.
She ran her hands over his back, eager to feel his body, eager to sooth the eruption of emotions.
"I love you," he whispered into her hair.
"I dare hope you do because otherwise I'll have to date Joe to make this less embarrassing," she answered.
"Don't play with me," he begged. "There's only so much I can take."
"Don't you worry," she patted his shoulder blade and sneaked her hands beneath his waistcoat. The touch caused goosebumps over his skin and he felt how his own breathing became heavy. "I think I've got to carry you into the kitchen…" He mumbled against the delicate skin of her neck and picked her up.
"Siegfried Donald Farnon!" She complained as he heaved her over his shoulder. "You'll easily throw your back out!"
"You're light as a feather, my dearest!" He claimed, patting her behind. "Let an old daft man follow his dream. Just for once!"
A couple of minutes later two very intimidated dogs fled the kitchen and the door fell shut behind them, allowing the old man to live his dream and his dearest receiving the best shag of her life.