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“What do you think love is?”
Hyomin wasn't sure what she wanted to hear from asking Seokhoon that question. An answer? Explanation? Possibly some other word for the irritating feelings she had been experiencing more of the longer she worked with Mr. Yoon. First, it crossed every line. Every well established moral principle she kept close to her chest like a true lawyer. And yet these annoying, unrelenting feelings never dulled down or went away. Her confused, restless heart still called out to him for whatever reason. Maybe that's what love was, a lack of rationality. An absence of reason. The tiny voice inside you that can never really be pushed down far enough to drown out.
Seokhoon turned to gaze at the river that stretched out before them, the moonlight dancing on the delicate ripples of the water.
“Well…”
Hyomin’s heart skipped a beat, suddenly aware of how if she simply moved her leg an inch to her left, her knee would be touching his. It was almost as if at this moment, their closeness made all workplace hierarchy disappear, she felt at ease and yet exposed, as if her feelings were written all over her face.
“I’m not quite so sure either” He said, turning to bless her with one of his rare smiles she was seeing a lot more of recently, to her demise. “Ironic, since I've been married. However I'd bet most don’t have an answer to that question” Attorney Yoon concluded. “Or maybe I'm just too tired to answer a philosophical question sufficiently” Seokhoon chuckled along with Hyomin, their shared laughter fading into the warm summer night, leaving both with the uncertain feeling that this marked the beginning of something significant.
----
THREE MONTHS LATER
Hyomin locked eyes with Seokhoon as he entered the crowded elevator, the pair nodding politely at each other. As he stood next to her, the doors slowly closing in on them, Hyomin couldn’t help but notice a change in Seokhoon’s general aura, was it his…colongue? She remembered complementing him on his old one but objectively this one smelled just as good, masculine and mature with a hint of something sweet lingering under the top notes. It suited him. She couldn’t help but smile at the thought as they reached their floor.
They stayed silent as they walked down the hall toward their office, the tension between them almost suffocating. It has been like that lately, ever since the night of Jinwoo and Minjeong’s engagement drinks. Pregnant pauses, sudden intense eye contact across the meeting room table. Short, uneventful encounters in the break room that left her feeling breathless, for seemingly no reason. It was as if something had shifted that fateful evening, even though in reality nothing actually happened. Right?
As they approached closer to the glass office doors Hyomin stopped and turned to Seokhoon, “The new cologne smells great by the way, better than the old one even” She commented, locking eyes with him as he stared back, a rare expression of surprise printed across his face.
“Well, good luck today Attorney Yoon.” She bowed, pushing through the glass doors and into the bustling office. Seokhoon was left glued to the floor, gazing after her as she rounded the corner to her desk, ponytail swishing.
----
THREE MONTHS LATER
Jinwoo and Minjeong had managed to plan the wedding fairly quickly, as they planned to make the event a humble affair, especially considering the guest list was already pretty packed with Jinwoo’s many family members. However, the married couple had not hesitated in inviting their colleagues from the litigation team to the event, including Hyomin. She was more than happy to attend, especially considering how emotional weddings tended to make her. However, there was one issue. She had no date.
The rest of the litigation team had managed to recruit people to bring as a plus one, even if they didn’t have a partner themselves. But Hyomin had been so swept up in work these past few months, that it wasn't until the day before the wedding, at 2pm on a Friday, that she realised the prospect of a date had completely slipped her mind. In theory, she had no trouble going to events by herself, but she needed a ride to the venue and didn't really want to feel left out in a sea of couples, left to sit and wallow in her own unrequited feelings for her mentor of all people. As she stared down at the documents lying on her desk, she resolved to ask Seola if she was free to tag along, even though there could always be a chance of her being called in for a weekend shift at the hospital. Ugh, whatever. She just had to pray that the stars would align for tomorrow. -
Cracking her neck as she waited for the next lift, Hyomin yawned and glanced down at her watch. It was 10pm and she was so ready to go home. It wasn't the latest she’d ever worked, but somehow the stress of work and the sudden realisation of her lack of a plus-one had culminated in an uncharacteristic tiredness. She felt slightly loopy and most definitely ready to crash the moment she walked through the door.
Something alerted her seemingly numb senses. Attorney Yoon was standing next to her, facing the lift as he too waited for it to arrive. She couldn't help glancing at his profile, the dark brows and even darker eyes. She couldn't help but feel nervous around the man, even after a year of working together, like every fibre of her being was aware of his presence.
The elevator doors opened, both lawyers stepping into the lift. Alone. This wasn’t the first time they’d been alone together in an elevator, but this time it felt all the more plagued with tension. There was something inside Hyomin was willing her to say something, anything, as she stared at her warped reflection in the elevator door.
Without thinking, she blurted out, “Do you have a plus one for the wedding tomorrow?”
She regretted her question instantly. Why was she always doing this? Unintentionally making things awkward with the one man she strived to impress the most? So what if she was genuinely curious? It was none of her business.
Then came Seokhoon’s reply, “Why?”
Hyomin’s head snapped up from where she stared at her shoes, she was tongue-tied.
“Iwaswonderingifwecoudlgotogether” She mumbled, speaking before she allowed her brain to catch up. “That's if, you’re without a da- i mean, a plus-one”
She was suddenly all too aware of what she’d gotten herself into. In that moment she decided to just face her mistake and act as cool as possible, like a true lawyer. She could scream into her pillow in embarrassment later.
Forcing a smile that looked more like a grimace, she continued “I just really need a ride to the venue, and I don’t have anyone else to ask.”
Seokhoon considered this, studying her expression. “Sounds practical. I’ll pick you up around 3:30pm”
Before she could even register this response, the doors opened onto the ground floor and Seokhoon stepped out and turned to walk down the hall. Hyomin scurried out of the elevator too, shouting “Thank you Sir!” down the hallway as she watched Seokhoon’s tall figure vanish behind the entrance doors onto the street. He hadn’t even heard her thank you. She should probably be ashamed and embarrassed that she'd quite literally asked her boss for a ride to a wedding. The day before said wedding. Unprovoked. However, she couldn't help but smile at the interaction and the mere prospect of Seokhoon pulling up outside her apartment the next day.
----
SATURDAY EVENING
“I almost forgot there's a version of you that doesn't just dress in pantsuits and pajamas.” Seola joked as she zipped up the back of Hyomin’s dress, which was long sleeved, frilly and bright red, contrasting sharply with her dark hair. It had been collecting dust in her closet for a while, as she had bought it while dating her ex to save for a special occasion that thankfully never came. Considering herself in the mirror, she felt slightly insecure. She usually stuck to darker shades, this look felt like too much of a sudden change.
“You look gorgeous Hyomin, don’t overthink it” Seola instructed as she left Hyomin's room.
“I’m not!” Hyomiun protested, mumbling to herself as she slipped on her usual heels and picked up her purse.
Stepping out onto the pavement outside her apartment building, Hyomin felt the warm summer air hit her face, reminding her once more of the time she and Attorney Yoon spent by the river. However, the sound of a car engine snapped Hyomin out of her nostalgic daydream, looking up to see Mr. Yoon’s car pulled up on the side of her road. Her heart stumbled around in her chest as she approached the vehicle.
At the same time Yoon Seokhoon, sharp as ever in his signature black suit, rounded the side of the car in order to open Hyomin’s door. As she settled into the seat she looked up, locking eyes with her senior. He lingered there, holding the door open for a beat too long. Giving her a look she couldn’t quite decipher.
At the wedding, things proceeded smoothly. The main event took place in a dinner hall, Minjeong coming down the aisle looking like an angel, walking with a grace only she could master. Safe to say Jinwoo looked like the happiest man in the world.
During the vows Hyomin as usual struggled to fight back her tears, the display too heartfelt for her sensitive tear ducts to withstand. She caught Seokhoon side eyeing her with a slight smirk throughout this ordeal, which she chose to ignore. This once again cast her mind back to that night a whole year ago, where she opened up to him about her habit of tearing up at weddings, she wondered if he remembered.
The rest of the night took place on a rooftop overlooking the city lights, the view breathtaking and romantic. Drinks were served as the guests mingled under the stars. Hyomin had been talking to her team members like usual, but had gotten distracted by the view, opting to walk around to the other side of the rooftop in order to admire it. It wasn't before long that she sensed a familiar presence by her side at the railing, Yoon Seokhoon himself.
“Hello again Miss Kang” He greeted, Hyomin doing the same.
“Isn’t the moon beautiful tonight?” Hyomin asked, smiling to herself, the liquid courage she’d consumed earlier making her feel less nervous around Seokhoon than usual.
“Yes, it is,” Seokhoon murmured after a beat, and Hyomin swore she could see him looking around at her out of the corner of her eye. Was this his attempt at…flirting? No, it couldn’t be, who was she kidding?
The night was over, and the walk back to Seokhoon’s car was filled with a comfortable silence except for the clack of Hyomin’s heels on the concrete.
“It seems as if the car hasn't arrived yet” Seokhoon observed as they reached the end of the road, breaking the silence.
“That’s okay, it’s warm outside at least,” Hyomin replied, reaching behind her to inspect her sore heel. Turns out standing up in her work heels for hours is a much different experience to sitting down at her desk in them, she should've thought to bring some sort of plaster. Hyomin thought the move was discreet in the dim lighting of the street, but Seokhoon’s eyes tracked the movement instantly, noticing the swollen back of her heel, where her shoe had been rubbing into the skin.
“Sit down on these steps” He instructed, brows furrowed.
“Oh no worries, I'm fine! Nothing any woman can’t withstand” Hyomin laughed, brushing him off.
Seokhoon turned to her, “Please Hyomin” He asked, brown eyes so dark she could see her reflection in them. This simple act of saying ‘please’ coupled with the use of her first name immediately undid her, with Hyomin quickly sitting on the steps, Seokhoon kneeling down in front of her.
He took a small plaster out of his pocket and unwrapped it before moving to remove her shoe, “I only have one plaster, I hope that's okay”
“Of course it is, thank you for offering me one in the first place”
“It’s my responsibility” He robotically answered, and Hyomin’s heart couldn't help but sink a little, where did the responsibilities of a senior stop and where did the actions of a man romantically interested in her begin? The line never seemed clear when around Yoon Seokhoon.
Her train of thought was quickly cut short by the feeling of his gentle yet large hands cradling her heel. It treated the whole act of putting on the plaster as if she was made of glass, and it made her smile despite herself. Slipping on the heel for her after applying the plaster, his hand on the back of her shin, he looked up at her, “Be careful with what shoes you wear after this, you don’t want to worsen or infect the wound.”
His genuine concern made her heart pound as she nodded in agreement.
Seokhoon started to move to get up from his kneeling position, and Hyomin placed a hand on his shoulder, still seated on the step.
“What does this mean?” She mumbled, her tipsy state making her desperate for answers.
Seokhoon looked at her in astonishment, “What?”
“Don’t ‘what’ me Sir. I'm asking you. What does it mean when you do things like this?”
Taken aback and clearly struggling for something to say, Mr. Yoon could only revert back to the same old excuse, “Well, it’s because I'm your senior of course.”
Once again, his words contradicted the expression on his face as he gazed up at Hyomin, eyes wide and full of emotion.
“I guess it’s my fault then.”
“What is?”
“Letting myself entertain the notion that it could, in some reality, mean something else, something deeper. The fake date, the late night conversations over tea in the breakroom. I feel so idiotic for thinking it could hold the same meaning for you.” Hyomin hung her head in her lap, not entirely aware that this margarita-fuelled confession could be something she’d regret tomorrow and maybe for the rest of her life.
“Of course it means something, Hyomin.”
“Really?” Hyomin asked, voice filled with uncertainty as she looked down at him through her hair.
Seokhoon suddenly broke, the words rushing out of him like he’d been waiting for this moment, “I haven't opened up to another associate ever in the way I have with you. Hell, I haven't even opened up to anyone in the ways I have to you over these last few months. You-You bring it out of me, somehow. Little by little, since the first day you arrived at Yullim, you've brought out a side of me that I haven't let anyone see for a long time. Brought down walls I wasn't aware I still had standing. You…”
“I what?” Hyomin asked, breathless.
Seokhoon let out a sigh and continued slowly, “You bring out the best in me. So, don’t ever think our interactions meant nothing to me, because they mean more than you could ever know.”
Hyomin felt as if her heart was beating out of her chest, looking down at him then.
“Ms. Kang?”
She looked him right in the eye as she stood up to face him, the alcohol in her system making her fully intent on displaying what she felt, “How long do we have to pretend nights like this mean nothing? Stop being such…such a coward!”
Seokhoon rose to meet her eyes, looking down at her with an expression half shocked and half amused, “What did you just call me?”
The realisation hit her and she felt her face heat up, “I didn’t actually mean to-”
Suddenly, she felt Seokhoon’s hand move to gently land on her jaw, his index finger tracing her jawline. She felt herself swallow, left dumbstruck by the unexpected contact.
Seokhoon’s eyes flicked down to her mouth, a movement so sudden she could have missed it. His voice had a gravelly and restrained quality to it as he spoke.
“Is calling your mentor a ‘coward’ something an associate should do?”
“Right now, I don’t feel like your associate Sir.”
The tension was thick enough to cut with a knife when he asked, “Who are you to me, then?”
“Your date.” She answered.
Those two words seemed to act as a trigger, the lawyers leaning in at the same time to close the lingering distance that had become more and more bothersome the longer they’d known one another. The kiss started out cautious, both afraid of the other changing their mind. But soon enough his hands met her waist and her hands grasped his collar, the years of tension and hesitation unravelling between soft gasps and unrestrained affection. Hyomin wasn't thinking about the firm, her stupid principles or the years between them. Just Seokhoon, perfectly unguarded and kissing her like he’s making up for every time he pretended he didn't want to.
The car arrived soon after, and looking out the window, Hyomin’s mind was cast back to the night she tended to the wounds on Seokhoon’s hand, finding him drinking alone after fighting the client who stole his dog. The ride back from the bar that night, their hands were so close to touching. It felt maddening back then, that less than an inch of separation was all that was keeping her from crossing the line. Now, a year later, that distance was closed. Their hands intertwined between the seats as they drove off into the night. Into a future together that was uncertain, yes, but so exciting.