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“Beautiful like the Night Sky… ” That’s what Lily thought over and over again in her mind while watching Kaylee read. They always hang out in the library, and it didn’t take long for both of them to become best friends. They had a lot of things in common, and at the same time, were very different. While both are dreamy and philosophical, with love for abstract ideas and what-ifs, they think very differently. But still, it wasn’t enough to separate them.
Lily felt her heart racing, head supported by her hands, almost falling, just from looking at the girl. She had pale skin and messy purple hair in a ponytail. Even her flaws were beautiful for Lily, like her dark circles. Her face burned, her cheeks were red.
“I’m out of her league…” Lily thought. Her mind wandering… no. She has to do something, she has to say something. She can’t hide her feelings anymore. Not forever.
Lily takes a deep breath and smiles, taking the courage to initiate the conversation.
“Well, Kaylee…”
“Oh?” Kaylee stops, gazing at Lily, waiting for a response. Her cute surprised face made Lily skip a heartbeat.
“Wanna do something today? It’s been a while since we hung out… and I mean like, outside.”
Kaylee stops for a moment, she closes the book, adjusts her glasses, and looks down, thinking.
“I-I don’t mean like, noisy stuff, I mean like… hm… maybe… camping? A nature walk?” Lily plays with a strand of hair.
Kaylee smiles, content.
“I do enjoy camping. That’s good.”
“Maybe we can go stargazing!”
When Lily said that, Kaylee’s eyes lit up immediately. She gasps, holding her glasses in place with both hands. She smiles and lets out a giggle.
“Really? Stargazing?”
Lily smiled back and blushed; she knew she had touched a topic of interest for Kaylee. She did it on purpose.
“C-Can we like… go to a really dark site?” Kaylee suggests, with her hand on her chin.
“Oh, sure! I have a car, we can go!”
Kaylee immediately holds Lily’s hands, smiling and jumping.
“OH MY GOD! THAT’S SO COOL! Please! Let’s do it! Please!”
Lily blushes at Kaylee’s cute reaction. She never thought she could pull that off.
Out of a sudden, Kaylee grabs a laptop from her bag, opens it, and immediately goes to a weird site that Lily has never seen before. Looks like a map, with colors on top of it.
“Ummm! What is this?” Lily asks, surprised, both hands on her cheeks.
“We can look for the best dark sites here! We should go like… at least level 3 down… hmmmm… let me see…” Kaylee was glued to the screen. “In fact, I know a place we can camp! I’m checking them! Are we on a full moon? Please tell me we are on a new moon…”
Lily couldn’t help but giggle at the reaction.
“A-Aren’t you afraid someone’s gonna sneak on us?”
“Hm?” Kaylee pauses and looks directly at Lily. “But all the people are in the city.”
“Oh… of course… makes sense!”
“Use your brain!” Kaylee says, kidding, smiling at Lily before looking at the screen again.
Lily stops, looking down and smiling… her mind already fantasizing about what they would do.
“Can I bring my radio? I think listening to some dreamy songs while we stare at the stars can be quite nice!” Lily suggests.
“That’s really good! It tunes my brain to philosophy mode.”
“It turns mine into existential crisis mode sometimes.”
“Oh yeah, same. If I stare at the stars too much, I start overthinking…”
“Well, I have never seen the stars before… not like, in a dark site at least.” Lily shrugs.
“You don’t know what you’re missing! Did you know the Milky Way isn’t really colorful like the pictures? But still, looks amazing in the sky.”
“If I see the Milky Way… I might cry!”
“It’s okay…” Kaylee pauses and turns to Lily. “I cried the first time, too.” She smiles.
…
Both are now looking at the stars, on the sand, eating snacks.
Lily admires the beautiful Milky Way while lying down, with tears in her eyes. Her mind was thinking about how small she felt.
Kaylee, on the side, is trying to fix her telescope.
“Ummm, what lens millimeters should I use for Saturn? I forgot…”
Kaylee sighs and lies down on the sand, right next to Lily. Giving up on the telescope and just deciding to look at the sky with the naked eye.
“It’s beautiful, right?” Kaylee says, looking at the sky.
Lily keeps silent, Kaylee looking at her, confused.
“Lily?”
“Oh!” Lily pays attention again. “Sorry?”
Kaylee laughs. She knows the feeling of being lost in her thoughts. That’s exactly what she feels like when stargazing.
“What are you thinking about?” Kaylee tries to initiate a conversation.
“What do you think happens to us after we die?”
“Good question. I think… hmmm… at the same time that I believe we just rot, there are so many out-of-body experiences that always cite the same things… tunnel of light, flashbacks… I don’t think I can say for sure unless I experience it.”
“I have a theory… but I think you’re gonna judge me.”
“Don’t worry, I’m ready to hear.” Kaylee loves anything that makes her think. Even crazy theories.
“I think whatever you believe happens, will happen. Therefore, if you believe you will rot, you will. But if you believe you will go to the spiritual plane, you will. It’s like… all religions are real and not, they are all connected somehow, like a collective mind.”
“Wow! That’s very meta!” Kaylee giggles.
“Do you know Neville Goddard?”
“Law of Assumption, right? I don’t agree with everything he says… but I enjoy reading his books. Very wise man.” Kaylee says as she grabs more snacks to eat.
“Do you believe in affirmations?” Lily looks at Kaylee, curious.
“Affirmations are scientifically proven to do good. Even if it’s just a placebo, we know that a placebo works. So there’s nothing bad you can pull from affirmations.”
“Ha ha!” Lily can’t help but giggle. “I’m so thankful I find someone who doesn’t call me delusional for liking that stuff!”
“I think we as humans are too naive to decide what’s real and what’s not… maybe science is just magic proven on a practical level?”
“Would you judge me if I said… I believe in things like… reality jumping?” Lily looks worried.
Kaylee looks at Lily, too, for a moment.
“Why would I?” Kaylee looks serious.
“Ummm, wouldn’t you call me like… delulu or crazy?”
Kaylee giggles before holding Lily’s hand, making the green-haired girl blush immediately.
“I think you’re having too many interactions with toxic thinkers!” Kaylee has a bright smile on her face.
Lily feels heard and comfortable. She smiles back. They gaze at each other profoundly, smiling, flushing. They don’t have to say anything to each other to understand each other. At that moment, they felt something else.
“You know… sometimes I think… people assume I’m evil or something.” Kaylee opens up.
“What?”
“Like…” Kaylee looks up, thinking. “They assume I’m cold or unfeeling… people do… but deep down…” Kaylee pauses. She tries to articulate words, but can’t. Suddenly, she starts to tear up, trying to hold them down, but failing.
Lily smiles as she cleans one of Kaylee’s tears. She lies close and hugs the girl warmly. Kaylee sobs on Lily’s shoulder, on top of her.
“Deep down… I want to be liked by people too… I am a daydreamer too! I cry to myself when I see videos of kittens… do you believe me?” Kaylee looks at Lily, face full of tears.
“Of course I believe in you!” Lily also tears up. “You are amazing! And have an emotional heart too.” Lily caresses the girl’s hair. “And… I like you!”
Kaylee smiles, already calm. She hugs Lily while on top of her. “I like you too…”
"Just because you enjoy making sense of concepts doesn't mean you are emotionless. Just that you have an internal system you like to use. I bet that if you try, you can become very social, even."
"You're right. I'm glad I have you..." She holds Lily's hands and rests her head on her chest.
“You are human, Kaylee…” Lily looks back at the stars. “You are human…”