Chapter Text
All Shedletsky wanted was something to drink.
Y'know, late at night. If it really counted as night time, since it was perpetually dark out, but the skybox was making its second pass of the day, and everyone was asleep. Everyone except Shedletsky.
And Noob, as Shedletsky would come to find out, once he turned to leave the kitchen and noticed them sitting on the couch alone. It made him jump, rousing Noob from their blank staring into the dark room.
They had stared at him, and Shedletsky, a glass of water in his hand, stared back.
"Hey, buddy," he placed the unused hand into the pocket of his shorts, "What're you doing in the cabin?"
They nibbled their lip, a silence lapsing between them before responding. "What're you doing?" they asked instead.
Shedletsky shuffled a little. He raised his glass in a gesture, "Just thirsty, y'know."
Noob nodded, and Shedletsky knew that they knew it was a pointless question to ask. His feet carried him forward, rounding the coffee table to sit on the recliner to Noob's side, placing his cup down on the table as he did. "C'mon, what's bothering you?"
"Um, nothing," they said after a short pause. They were a horrible liar; it made Shedletsky's lip curl upward.
"You answered my question with a question," he pointed out. It resulted in Noob huffing and sitting back against the chair.
They seemed to war over it for a moment, their mouth opening and closing as they gathered the courage. Shedletsky was hunched over, clasping his hands together in front of him and watching Noob patiently.
"... I'm genderfluid," they admitted, and Shedletsky's brows rose, "And I really feel like a girl right now but I don't have any of the stuff I use to make me feel feminine, and it's making me want to submerge myself in the freezing lake by the dock."
They spoke hurriedly, but their words were clear. They finally made eye contact with the ex-admin once they finished speaking, checking his reaction. They looked away when he still didn't say anything, surprise etching his features. "Just like... as a shock to my system, y'know? To distract me," the survivalist muttered, embarrassed.
Shedletsky rolled his lip in apprehension. This definitely wasn't something he had to deal with before, but there was one idea that appeared in his mind. It felt so simple, but it was something that made his heart hurt to think about doing.
"Well, maybe some of the other survivors have something you can use?" Shedletsky suggested instead. Noob shuffled in their chair.
"I'm not even out to anyone else yet, and besides, everyone's asleep," Noob countered slowly. "I... I need this now, or else I won't sleep tonight and," they suddenly breathed a sharp breath in, huffing impatiently, "And I won't be any good next round."
Shedletsky watched them, feeling worse by the moment. He steeled himself to what he was about to offer. There was a way he could help, and it was in his responsibility to do so when he could.
"I have some makeup," he said, and Noob's head shot up to stare at him. The swordmaster's face reddened in embarrassment, glancing away. "It belonged to someone I knew. I always carried it for her, but it managed to come here with me."
Hope lifted Noob's spirits, though something in Shedletsky's tone made them unsure. "If you're sure? If it means something to you, I don't want to —"
Shedletsky waved a dismissive hand. "Ah, who else is going to use it? It's, uh, in my cabin. I'll go grab it, 'kay?"
A short, hesitant nod. "'Kay."
Shedletsky ended up sitting in the living room, sipping on lukewarm water as he waited for Noob to finish their makeup in the bathroom upstairs, when a thought suddenly occurred.
Once he got back from the second trip to his cabin, Noob had finished and walked down the stairs towards him.
"How's it look?" They stopped near the bottom step, and he looked up from what he was holding towards their face.
It wasn't much, but it went a long way. pinkened lips, eyeliner and eye shadow, a little star drawn in eyeliner pen on the cheek. Their hair was short, but it was long enough to fit in a ponytail, framing their face differently, softer. Any longer and they would've looked just like Brighteyes.
Shaking his head, he cast the thoughts away. He still hadn't responded.
"Definitely like a girl," he said with a grin. Noob almost seemed relaxed, rolling their eyes with a smirk and walking the rest of the way down the steps. Her eyes land on the purple fabric in the ex-admin's hands.
"What's that?"
Shedletsky jumped. He nearly forgot.
"Oh yeah, I have this jacket if you wanted to borrow it," he took it in one hand and held it out for them to take. "It's not a skirt or anything like that, but y'know, I thought it might help."
Noob set the makeup palette down on the coffee table before they gently reached out to grab it out of Shedletsky's hand. The exchange was slow, delicate, and they looked at the jacket hanging in their arms like it meant something.
"And you just have this around too?" they asked instead of speaking those thoughts, brows furrowing at Shedletsky.
He was unable to stop the grin from worming onto his face. "Got her whole purse with me. That's one of her spares." That got Noob to huff a laugh.
"And she just has this in there?" They asked, an incredulous lilt to their voice, "How big is her purse?"
"Oh, it's pretty small, but I swear it's infinite." Nostalgia made Shedletsky feel light and airy, and mirth lit something in Noob's eyes. An amused smirk raised the corner of their lip.
"You think it's magic?"
"Trust me, I've checked!"
A mutual laugh echoed between the two, and Noob shook their head once the two died down. They threw the jacket on, adjusting the front before looking back up at the swordfighter.
"How about now?"
Something in Shedletsky stopped dead.
Seeing Noob, in her makeup, in her jacket, it sent a kind of longing through him that felt debilitating. A feeling of loss crept into his heart.
Noob politely didn't comment on the unsteady breath the ex-admin drew in, nor the smile that was just a bit too shaky.
"Perfect," he said, barely able to hold back the emotion in his voice. "We can talk to Builderman about making you something more permanent in the morning," Shedletsky added, choosing to move on. "He's trustworthy, I promise. Me and him go way back."
Noob looked down and away, hair falling into their eyes.
"Well, if he's your friend, then I guess I'm alright with that," they muttered, smiling despite the anxiety spinning in their gut. Shedletsky ignored the giddiness that built up inside him from their words.
"Cool," he breathed. "Go get some rest," he pat Noob on the back, spurring them on towards the cabin door.
"You too," they nodded, and ducked out.
Shedletsky watched them go for a moment, still standing in the middle of the floor. Eventually, he reached down to grab the makeup palette, and he stared down at it for a while longer. That night, it was kept out at his bedside table, keeping the ex-admin from falling asleep.
{ }
"Shed."
A hand was shaking Shedletsky awake.
Each survivor had a cabin they resided in, rooming with one other survivor. At the time, Shedletsky had chosen to room with Builderman, since they had an extensive background together.
That was, before realizing how much Builderman loved waking him up at, quote unquote, "Appropriate times."
A stubborn grumble erupted from Shedletsky, but the engineer didn't allow him the liberty of more rest and tried again. "C'mon, Shed. Elliot's makin' breakfast, time to get up."
Damn Builder. He knew how to deal with Shedletsky all too well.
Grunting with effort, the ex-admin finally pulled himself off his pillow, eyes heavy with sleep still weighing on them.
There Builderman stood in all his glory, blocking out the ceiling light from Shedletsky's view. The ex-admin squints through the brightness anyway, and his old friend plows ahead regardless. "Mornin'," was all he had to say for himself. It made Shedletsky huff and rub his eyes before throwing off the blankets. He moved his legs over the side of the bed and perched himself up with his arms, glaring at the man.
"Don't be smug," he grouched, and the old man gave him space to finish getting up.
Nowadays, Builderman wasn't as talkative of a person. He spoke when it was needed and not much beyond that, something Shedletsky could respect even as a certified yapper by everyone who knew him. Which is why it wasn't concerning when the man stayed quiet as Shedletsky stretched and cracked his back.
Just as he was about to indicate they should head out, Builderman cut him off instead.
"Is that makeup?" Came his gruff voice, and an odd feeling of dread filled the ex-admin. His eyes followed the engineer's gaze to the night stand, an eyeshadow palette and a few other makeup products piled together.
"Um," Shedletsky's voice was oddly soft and quiet, and it made him feel sick. He couldn't even mourn like a normal person.
He cleared his throat and spoke, making sure his speech wasn't so this time. "It's Bright's," he admits, shoulders slumping, as though that was explanation enough. Builderman stared at him for what seemed like too long, tongue rolling around in his mouth.
Then, his friend put a hand on his shoulder. Shedletsky could feel the warmth even through his thick hood, and his mangled wings flutter softly beneath the cloth. "I know you miss her, Shed. Keep 'er close," was all he said, slipping his hand away. "C'mon, breakfast ought to be done by now."
Watching Builderman leave the small cabin, Shedletsky stands behind for a moment, feeling oddly numb, maybe even embarrassed. He couldn't tell.
He slipped the makeup products into the drawer alongside her purse before closing the door behind him.
Walking into the main cabin, Shedletsky remembered the promise he made to Noob the night before as his eyes landed on them at one of the dining tables. They were still wearing his wife's jacket, and all those feelings from last night came rushing back as well.
Builderman caught the sight of Noob at that same moment, his gaze turning scrutinizing as his brain pieced together the similarities.
Shedletsky bumped him as he stepped forward, gesturing for Builderman to follow him as he made his way to Noob's table, which was completely vacant except for the lone robloxian.
Noob noticed the two of them and seemed to clam up, especially around Builderman even as he greeted them with a kind smile.
"Likin' the look," Builderman nodded approvingly, to which Noob nodded vigorously.
"Thank you!" they blurted out hastily. It was a little funny how stiff they were within the man's presence.
Shedletsky glanced between them and his friend, a passive smile on his face. "I was thinking, would you wanna have that talk with us in my cabin after breakfast?" he suggested. Noob mumbled a quick agreement, and the ex-admin grinned in satisfaction. "Awesome! We'll see you then, 'kay?"
He led Builderman away from the table, proud of setting a plan into action. Neither of them spoke as they gathered their food which consisted of a simple plate of pancakes and some breakfast sausage, but Shedletsky failed to notice the engineer's souring mood even as they sat down at one of the tables together.
"What was that?" Builderman hissed as Shedletsky began stuffing his face, making him pause with a pancake in his mouth. He began slowly chewing it away as the comment processed.
He swallowed down the bite of food. "Noob just needs a little bit of your help, no big deal," he explained, though how unsure he was showed through his voice.
"Not what I meant," Builderman said, sitting back in his chair. The bill of his hat covered his eyes when he angled his head down for a moment. "I mean the jacket, Shed."
Slowly, Shedletsky's shoulders fell, confusion still riddling his posture. "It was just to make them feel better, I don't..."
"For all of Robloxia's sake, Shedletsky, they look just like Brighteyes!" the old man cut the ex-admin off, voice still miraculously quiet enough that any surrounding conversations drowned it out. Awkwardly, Shedletsky pursed his lips.
"Builds, it's not about that," he finds himself explaining, something about the conversation making his wings curl inward. "They just needed some help changing up their appearance since they couldn't do it alone... They wanted to ask you for a more permanent solution, that's all."
Builderman stared at him, an exhaustion in his eyes that Shedletsky rarely saw. It made him apprehensive and nervous.
"Shed," the engineer said slowly. After a moment of working his mouth and nothing coming out, he lets out a defeated sigh. Instead of whatever he was going to say, he says, "You can always talk to me about anything, you know that, right?"
He had made a point to look Shedletsky in the eye as he spoke, and Shedletsky stared back as more anxiety built up throughout his body.
"... Of course," the ex-admin complied, and Builderman's shoulders fell slightly. The gray robloxian nodded.
"Good," he replied.
The conversation fell away after that, the two returning to eat in relative silence as the only quiet table in a dining room full of idle conversation and forks scraping.
Eventually, as people were finishing up and giving thanks to Elliot and Guest, who had helped with prep, Builderman went ahead to the cabin as Shedletsky made his way to Noob's table.
He put a taloned hand on the table to grab their attention. "C'mon, Builderman's waiting for us there."
"You haven't told him yet?" Noob whispered on the short walk over.
"Nah, that's your personal stuff. Didn't wanna do it without you," Shedletsky easily replied.
As they approached, Builderman was standing outside the door and politely waiting for them. He nodded in acknowledgement and opened the door, following and closing the door behind them.
Noob glanced around curiously at the inside of the cabin, a quiet amazement at a peek into the two admins' lifestyles. Shedletsky found himself smiling in amusement despite himself, entertained by the hero-worship his close friend was often subject to.
As Builderman sat down on his own bed on the other side of Shedletsky's, Shedletsky coughed into his hand to catch Noob's attention. They jumped and reddened, flustered at being caught so blatantly in awe at what was effectively a normal cabin space.
"Um, Builderman..." Noob fumbled, fiddling with the zipper of Brighteyes' jacket. Shedletsky's brow raised.
"Do you want me to do it?" he asked politely.
After a moment of staring back at him, Noob visibly steeled themself, shaking their head in response.
"Sometimes I feel like a girl," they addressed Builderman, looking him in the eyes as he listened calmly. He leaned forward and intertwined his hands, resting his arms on his knees to listen more intently. "And that's normal for me, but I don't have anything that... matches what I feel like, not since being sent here."
An understanding nod. "And you want my help?"
Noob nodded vigorously, happy Builderman caught on himself. "You're always doing your best to make this place as comfortable as possible for the rest of us, and I know you still have at least some ability to create here," they said, straightening up the more they spoke, their voice becoming less shy and quiet. "Just... If it's not too much, could you make me some clothes? Or makeup?"
Builderman stood up, putting his hand reassuringly on Noob's arm. Shedletsky's smile turned into a pleased grin at the interaction, feeling very much proud of Noob for being able to ask things for themself.
"How about we take this time to brainstorm up some clothing ideas before the next round?" Builderman proposed, prompting Noob to grin bashfully. "I dunno much about makeup though, so you'll have to help me with that. Sound good?"
"Yes please."
The two of them got to work planning out everything, and Noob ended up getting a full breakdown of just how Builderman's powers worked. He could make almost anything as long as he knew what the dimensions, shapes and materials were, and then with a hammer hanging from his toolbelt, he could build it from the ground up.
Even though Shedletsky knew this process in depth, he found himself hanging around and watching as they brainstormed, feeling content to just observe the two in silence.
It had taken a while, but eventually, Noob had a small collection of clothes they could wear and a few makeup kits before a round could start.
Noob eventually left to try on some articles of clothing, leaving the two old friends sitting in the silence left behind.
Shedletsky was more than willing to simply exist in each other's presence, but Builderman still had something to say.
"I'm sorry about earlier," his gruff voice drifted softly into Shedletsky's ears, and he looked towards Builderman, feeling vaguely confused.
The engineer shifts his weight before he speaks again, his hands keeping him propped up on the bed.
"I shouldn't have accused you like that. You had good intentions," he admitted. Shedletsky frowned, ducking his head in thought.
"But?" he pushed.
Regrettably, Builderman sighed heavily. "But I'm worried about you, Shed."
Shedletsky paused, staring at his friend hesitantly. He worked his mouth, trying to find something to say, but before he could begin to respond, the door to the cabin opened once more.
Both of their heads snap towards the front of the cabin as Noob steps back in, wearing a black hoodie and a frilly blue skirt. They had put on a pair of tall white socks and a couple red hair clips in their bangs that Builderman made as well, aiding the ponytail in styling their hair even further. The makeup from before was touched up some as well.
Smiling apprehensively, Noob moved a strand of hair out of their face before moving to hold their hands together. "I think we did alright," they said proudly.
Builderman smiled warmly. "Well, y'don't look too bad," he agreed cheekily, tipping his hardhat. Noob grinned wider before glancing down at the coat in their arms.
Shedletsky blinked when they approached him, his eyes drawing to the jacket as well. He gently grabbed it as Noob handed it over to him.
"Thank you," they spoke, just above a whisper. Something about their tone made Shedletsky glance up, meeting their gaze. Noob's grin was all too soft, something impossibly understanding within it. "I hope you find her."
Swallowing weakly, the ex-admin nodded, something inside him telling him that they were all too aware of how it felt.
"I will," he hoped.
It was at that moment that Builderman cleared his throat into his palm, and the two snapped their heads toward him.
"It'd be best if we go back to the main cabin while we wait for the next round," he beckoned as he stood, leading the way out of the confined space.