Work Text:
Benjamin was sitting by himself on the top deck one evening, just staring out to sea. The gentle summer breeze brushed over him. The sky had been painted with stunning sunset shades. Soft pink, purple and orange were blending together beautifully, effortlessly. It was the most peaceful setting one could imagine, but the young artist wasn't exactly at peace with himself. He was quite mopey. That wasn't like him at all. He was singing something, as if to distract himself.
Två små männskor ifrån skilda världar
Två små hjärtan börjar slå i samma takt
Kärlek känner aldrig några gränser
Den har en sån oförklarlig makt
His voice was quiet but even. Really pleasant to listen to.
"I had a feeling I'd find you here,"
Julia commented quietly as she approached his position. He went silent right away. And honestly.. She hated having said anything because it really sounded like she had interrupted something.
"I don't think that was too hard.. I'm usually always here around this time,"
Benjamin said back, his voice flat and weirdly repressed. Julia closed the remaining distance and then sat down next to him. A brief but oddly comfortable silence fell over them, wrapping them both in the invisible blanket.
"On summer nights like this I'd be playing my guitar.. I would probably do that now, too, if I still had one. Too bad that Sinikka crushed it,"
Benjamin sighed after a while, starting to open up without Julia pushing him to do anything. She then placed her hand on his knee and squeezed it gently.
"You really are a romantic soul, aren't you?"
"Yes.. I guess you can say that. Night time and strumming a guitar just.. In my mind they belong together. But now I'm.. not sure what I'm supposed to be doing with my hands."
Julia raised an eyebrow at his choice of words which led to him stuttering a little.
"I-I didn't mean for it to sound like that. Oh my god I'm such an embarrassment.."
He then went on to hide his face in his hands. Julia smiled and put a hand on his shoulder to offer some comfort.
"I don't think you are. You're just led by your heart instead of reason. And maybe it will at times mean that you'll blurt out something before you can stop yourself and think about it. But that is okay. Listen.. I'm sorry about us costing you a guitar,"
Julia then offered him an apology. Benjamin shook his head a little.
"No, it's.. It's alright. You didn't really have anything to do with it, anyway.. You just happened to be there."
It wasn't as alright as he made it out to be.
"Benjamin.. You know that you don't have to pretend. Not with me. And.. I'm sorry but I have to say this.. You're not very good at hiding the way you really feel. It's always written on your face, as clear as day."
"Do you think everyone has noticed it all..?"
Now it was Julia who shook her head.
"No.. Not everyone stops for long enough. But I have seen it. I see you.
Benjamin then gave her a little smile. But after seeing how it didn't quite reach his eyes, Julia chose to change the subject in hopes of cheering him up.
"So, Linda Q. She was amazing again today, wasn't she?"
Benjamin nodded, a dreamy look in his eyes. When he spoke next, his voice was soft and equally as dreamy.
"Yes.. She always is. Incredible,"
he sighed, sounding just the right amount of smitten. Julia smiled warmly, finding it hard to hide the adoration she felt.
"I've never met anyone who gets as crazy during any show as you do during all of hers. Where does all that energy come from?"
she inquired.
"I.. I don't know. I guess it really just comes down to seeing your favorite artist perform. And from up close like that. It just makes me want to dance and go crazy."
"And that's exactly what you did, fanboy."
"Oh, not that again.."
Benjamin groaned, a smile now tugging on the corners of his mouth.
"I'm sorry but that nickname is here to stay."
They both chuckled while looking at each other.
"Ho-Ho-Hollywood..!"
Benjamin then exclaimed in an excited, breathy tone and settled to lie down on his back. His eyes had a soft, dim shine in them. Julia giggled.
"And.. How many people get to talk with their idol after a show? And to take a little photo with them? Thank you.. For letting me tag along on my first day."
There was seemingly no end to his gushing.
"Like I said.. Fanboy. And of course. I couldn't deny it after I learned that you're also a fan of hers."
She then went to lie down next to him. Their arms brushed against each other for a short while. Julia could feel him shiver. But not because of cold.
Benjamin still felt quite restless in his heart even after Julia's presence had helped calm him down a little. And after a while he sat back up. From there he got up on his feet. Julia followed his example, suddenly a bit confused.
"Benjamin?"
He didn't give her any immediate answer. Instead, they ended up circling each other slowly while holding hands. After a while, as Benjamin was looking into Julia's eyes, his mouth started to feel dry. He had only one question running around in his head in one, endless circle. He then chose to ask it out loud.
"Is it okay if I..?"
Part of the question ended up getting stuck in his throat, but Julia seemed to understand him anyway. They were standing so close to each other, closer than they ever had before. Julia responded with a tiny nod, feeling something take her breath away.
Their arms then found their way around each other's waist. They weren't quite sure if either of them was breathing for the next few seconds. And then Benjamin moved just a little closer, his lips soon brushing against Julia's. Everything about it was nervous and somewhat hesitant, like he wasn't quite sure about how much he should be doing until it would stop being okay. But Julia wasn't pushing him away, so he felt encouraged to keep going. The next time was much closer to a proper kiss. And Julia responded to it, closing her eyes as she eased into it. Benjamin's were already closed.
As they pulled away after a while, she giggled a little awkwardly. A quiet but bubbly laughter was building up in Benjamin's chest and only moments later he was laughing. Julia brought her hand up to his face and began to trace the dimples formed on Benjamin's face as he smiled with squinted eyes. She already loved that look on him.
"Hey.. What were you singing when I got here?"
she then had to ask after they'd sat back down.
"I'm sorry I interrupted you. You sounded really good."
Benjamin responded with a sincere smile.
"You think so? Tack. That was Lotta Engberg. Juliette & Jonathan,"
he then told Julia who listened attentively.
"Let me guess, she sings schlager?"
Benjamin nodded right away. Julia wasn't exactly surprised to learn this. She had of course already learned that Benjamin was really passionate about schlager.
"Ja.. She has competed in Melodifestivalen multiple times. With this song in 1996. She placed 3rd."
"Was that the best she has done?"
Julia then asked, wanting to show interest in something Benjamin loved so much. He shook his head slowly.
"No.. She did win in 1987 and finished 2nd in 1984."
"You've really done your homework. I have no doubt you'll follow in her footsteps one day. Win Melodifestivalen and represent Sweden in Eurovision. Everyone in Sweden will know your name. In Finland, too. I know you can do it,"
Julia told Benjamin, her voice encouraging.
"Thank you.. All of it still feels like a distant dream now. Somewhat hard to imagine just yet. But.. Maybe some day all of that will happen,"
he breathed out, a dreamy undertone in his voice.
"I know it will,"
Julia added with no hesitation.
"Benjamin?"
She spoke after a moment spent in soft silence, leaning into each other.
"Yes?"
"There's something I've always wanted to try,"
she told him a little mysteriously as she got back up on her feet.
"What is it?"
Benjamin asked, now feeling curious. But Julia wouldn't tell, she only held out her hand. He took it and she pulled him up.
She then asked him to close his eyes. And as he did, she led him closer towards the front of Botnia Paradise.
"Now hold on to the railing,"
she instructed and guided Benjamin's hands to it. He placed his hands down and wrapped his fingers around the railing. It was pleasantly cool to the touch.
"What are we doing?"
he asked, quiet laughter bubbling in his chest.
"Shh. You'll find out in a bit."
That was all Julia told him as she wanted to keep the suspense up for as long as possible.
"You're not going to make me lean over the railing and then push me overboard, are you?"
Julia then slapped his arm playfully.
"I would never do something like that. Now, keep your eyes closed. Don't peek."
"I'm not,"
Benjamin said with almost bated breath.
"Step up onto the railing,"
he soon heard Julia's voice directly from behind him. His face was in frown for a second or two before he lifted up his foot, feeling for the railing. As soon as he found it, he placed his foot down while also making sure to keep his hands in place and not let go. Soon one foot followed another and he swayed a little as the safety of the deck disappeared from underneath him. Julia kept a secure hold on him, her hands now around his waist. She had stepped up onto the railing as well.
"Do you trust me?"
she then asked a question that felt almost magical. Like it was charged with something only the two of them could feel. Benjamin nodded, eyes still shut tight.
"I trust you."
His voice was breathy. This wasn't just some joke to him. He really meant what he said.
Julia then took Benjamin's hands, slowly removing them from the railing and lifted them up until they were straightened out on both sides. Benjamin could feel the soft, pleasant evening breeze on his face. Then.. Julia let go of his hands and held onto his waist once more.
"Alright.. Open your eyes,"
she encouraged him right by his ear. And he did.
What Benjamin then saw in front of him was like something out of a fairytale. The open sea spread out all around them, as far as he could see. The water's surface had been skillfully painted with a gentle but still confident orange.
They weren't even on a luxurious first-class passenger liner, far from it. But the moment was still almost like from a movie. That moment existed only for them, with the ocean as their backdrop and the stunning sunset on the horizon. Benjamin breathed out as they were caught in the sky's burning glow.
"Have you ever done anything like this in your life before?"
Julia said in almost a whisper. Benjamin only shook his head, having been momentarily muted by the experience Julia had surprised him with.
"Just promise me you won't let go."
Julia's arms were still secured around Benjamin's waist. And that was exactly where he wished for them to remain. Julia shook her head and gave Benjamin her promise:
"I'll never let go."