Work Text:
It was rare for Zoro to ever request a song from Brook. He only did it once in a blue moon. So he knew it was getting bad when he requested the same song for the fifth time. And that only when he knew nobody else, especially not Sanji, was around. The only one that could ever know about this was Brook.
And Robin. But Zoro did not know that she was listening in on almost every room and on deck. So yes, Robin knew too.
The song was something that Zoro had once heard while he had been getting medical attention from Perona, something about a boy in a dress. Back then he had not listened to the lyrics as carefully as he did now. Now he almost wanted to sing along. However Zoro was also aware that if he were to sing, almost everybody would rush on deck.
So no singing for Zoro. Because nobody should know about this. Not even Brook. But Zoro could not really threaten him besides telling him he'd push him into the open sea and watch him drown if he ever told anybody about this.
Brook's voice was always so wistful when he sang this song. Almost like he knew about the heartbreak happening in Zoro's chest.
Back when they had all reunited on Sabaody the only apparent change Sanji had gone through was to change his hair style and that he had gotten stronger. Yet before Zoro could hop on the Sunny for the first time in two years, some strange people gave him a photograph. Of Sanji. In a dress. Wearing make-up.
At first Zoro could not believe his luck. Truly that photograph must have been god-sent. He would have blackmail material for years to come.
Later when he looked at the photo once again, he had a realisation. He really liked that outfit on Sanji. Like really really liked it. Zoro still thought that the photo was god-sent. But now because of different reasons. Now he would look at it before going to sleep. Now he wanted to keep it just for himself. Not even Sanji could know about it.
In recent days Zoro had come to a realisation once again. This time he realised that he did not only feel aesthetic attraction towards Sanji. He was also romantically (and maybe sexually) attracted to Sanji.
That night had been very long. Although Zoro does not question his feelings often, mostly trusting his instincts to tell him if something is wrong or right, he did that night. Why would he feel attracted to the man he was supposed to hate the most?
The photo certainly did not help at all.
Regardless of all of that though, after the realisation Zoro requested the song once, because he was reminded of it. After the fifth time he knew the lyrics by heart.
Even though Brook sometimes shot him a questioning look, Zoro ignored those. It wasn't important what Brook thought about Zoro having a slight heartbreak.
Yes, Zoro's heart was already broken. How could it now? Sanji was straight. As straight as they get. Not even a ruler was as straight as him. He was a lady's man. Sanji made that very clear.
So yes, Zoro had small heartbreaks throughout the whole day, every time he heard Sanji's voice, when he had to talk to him —although he did his best to not talk to him, opting for grunting instead— even when Sanji was only mentioned.
Zoro did not even get into their daily daily (sometimes hourly) fights because every time he looked at Sanji something inside of him decided that it would be a good time to dream up their future and how happy they would be when they got together. How Sanji's behaviour would probably not change, he would still be as demanding as he was now. But Zoro would change. He would start to listen, not all the time, but small things that would make the cook happy.
The song helped Zoro deal with his feelings. He thought about them, thought about how doomed he was, how in love with Sanji he was, and then threw it all out the window into the sea. It would know what to make of that chaos better than him.
So when he turned to Brook, he was starting to think that Brook tried to be alone with him as often as it was possible because he had realised that Zoro needed someone to comfort him, and requested that song once more, he did not expect Robin to enter the aquarium so suddenly.
"Who is it?" Robin asked as if Zoro would know what to make of the question.
"Who is what?" Zoro asked in return, confused what she was talking about.
"The one you yearn for. The one you think about when you listen to the song," is all Zoro got in explanation
"I don't yearn for anybody."
"Yeah sure and I'm not married to Franky. How about you start owning up to your feelings?"
"How about you don't meddle with other people's business?"
"You know that this is going to become all of our business when it affects you this much already."
"Yeah whatever."
"If you ever need to talk just know you can come to me."
Climbing up into the crow's nest, Zoro tried to rationalise his feelings. There was no reason to be so heartbroken over something that he always knew would happen. He would give himself one last day to mourn his one-sided love. After tomorrow he would throw them into the open sea and watch them drown, only that this time it would be more than just a threat.
It would not affect the crew. Nor the way he fought.
So fully intending to drown out his feelings for a certain cook, Zoro lifted the bottle to his mouth and began drinking.
He had no idea how he ended up in his own hammock that night.
When Zoro woke up the next morning he was surrounded by empty bottles. Even though he had drank that much, it barely had any effect on him. The day he got drunk would be his last. And that only because he knew he would start listening to his instincts.
Of course Nami and the cook were up too which just meant that Zoro would have to wait for his turn in the bathroom, because although Sanji often said that he did not shower enough, he did it every second day. However he had to wait until Nami was done with her morning routine, if he did not want to add to his debt. The witch did not want to be disturbed while she was in there.
Just as Zoro finally moved to go into the room, the cook was already swinging the door closed. One day he would beat the crap out of that guy. After this one day preferably. Just so he would not have an aching heart looking at a hurt Sanji.
Zoro would just have to wait a little longer. No big deal. At least it wouldn't be if it didn't happen almost every day. The only exceptions being when one of them was on watch.
It was the last day he would give in to his feelings. He should use it more efficiently than this. Maybe think about how life has wronged him. How sad and unfulfilling his life was now that he would never have a chance to be with his love.
Yet, something held Zoro back. Something, probably his heart, told him that he should wait for the cook to leave the bathroom and start making breakfast so that he could watch Sanji. A few hours of missed washing wouldn't hurt anybody. Not even Sanji, because he had that weird prejudice that Zoro never washed anyway.
Watching the cook was one of Zoro's favourite things to do. Not that he would ever admit that. After this day he would have to find a new obsession. One that did not include Sanji in any shape or form.
Sanji was cutting some fruits, if Zoro had to guess it was Mango and peaches which they had gotten at the last island. Sanji once again asked for his help with carrying all the groceries which just gave Zoro the opportunity to watch the cook in his natural element, talking to women and trying to haggle the price of the produce down.
When Zoro entered the galley the other did not even glance back at him, his observation haki probably telling him who it was already. Even if it didn't, the cook was used to some of the crew members seeking company in the galley while he prepared the dishes.
Just as he sat down, Chopper stepped into the room. Meaning that Zoro would have something else to focus on other than Sanji. So he picked up Chopper and placed him on his own lap, where the reindeer got comfortable, before he spoke up, being careful to keep his voice down so that Sanji wouldn't hear anything.
"Robin told me you have a heart disease," Chopper said while looking at him with big sad eyes.
"What? I don't have a heart disease. You probably misunderstood what she was trying to say. What did she tell you?" Zoro asked, wishing that Robin would just keep out of his business.
"She told me you got your heart broken."
"Oh of course she would say that. You know that that isn't a heart disease right?"
"But she said that it is likely that you would get the broken heart syndrome. And I know what that is."
Zoro sighed, this was going to be difficult to explain to Chopper that only his feelings got hurt. There surely was no way he would get broken heart syndrome.
"I've just gotten indirectly rejected. Nothing more. Everything is going to be fine tomorrow."
"I will do a quick check up on you then," Chopper said before he turned to Sanji and started a conversation with him, yet Zoro completely tuned it out.
Just as Usopp sat down at the table, the last one to do so except for Sanji, the preparations were done and the cook served all of them their specific plate.
While Zoro was shovelling down the food, he watched how Sanji interacted with the crew. How loose he got around them. Very much unlike how Sanji was with him, always prepared to be attacked, on guard. And although they teased each other very often, there was never a time where the cook would actually mean it in a friendly way. It was always hostile. Another reason why there was no chance of them actually being able to have a relationship, even if they ignored the part in which Sanji was very straight.
Zoro only had one day left to simp for the cook and he would use it to the fullest.
So staring was basically all Zoro did for that day. He stared at him preparing the meals, while Zoro was training he watched Sanji give Robin and Nami their drinks with his usual twirling and almost nosebleeds. Zoro watched Sanji when no one else paid him attention.
As the sky slowly turned darker Zoro snuck into the galley for his last bottle of sake for the day. Luckily no one was there, the cook already done with cleaning up the mess that had been dinner. So Zoro returned to the crow's nest with his bottle and got thinking.
How had Nami managed it back then when she had to leave Vivi behind in Alabasta? Did she feel this heartbroken too? How is it that she didn't look anywhere close to what he felt like.
Only a few hours where left. After that Zoro must not think about Sanji in a romantic way. He had promised himself since otherwise it would probably interfere with his performance.
Maybe it would be better for his mind if he went to bed earlier today. Then he did not have to think about his unrequited love for too long. But at the same time he had told himself that he would use that time to the fullest.
Before Zoro could really contemplate what he should do a sudden pain in his chest distracted him. The pain left him curling in on himself, trying to block out wherever the pain came from.
After a while of pure agony, Zoro decided that he would end his day here, not wanting to deal with whatever that just was. So he climbed down the ladder and went to the men's sleeping quarter, where he woke up Brook to take over the watch. He told him to play that song one last time.
The next day Zoro began burying his feelings. First thing he did was to put the photo of Sanji in the dress and stuffed it away in the deepest part of his locker. Not even he himself would find it there. And that had nothing to do with what other people might think is his problem with direction.
The second not so noticeable thing he did was to stop requesting Brook to play the song. That would only hinder him from reaching his goal. However something almost everyone noticed was that Zoro stared less often at Sanji. Like almost never. Even Luffy noticed.
And as if that wasn't enough, every time he even thought about Sanji, if it was in a romantic or platonic way, he would get the weird pain in his chest again.
After Luffy had found Zoro, curled in on himself once more while he grunted in pain, he had started to worry. "Maybe you should go to Chopper and get that checked." Therefore leaving him no other choice but to do so right after the pain stopped. Luffy also made sure he actually did by carrying him to the sick bay after Zoro had grunted in affirmation. Luckily they had been in the aquarium room so no one saw Zoro in that embarrassing position.
Luffy put him on one of the beds, before he left again to get Chopper. That left Zoro with some time to think about what he would tell Chopper, since he would obviously worry. especially after just telling him that he would get sick from all of that heartbreak.
Fortunately for Zoro, Chopper had put on his professional front when he was doing his best to find the cause. First testing his blood, checking if his coronary artery had any blockages in it, before testing if his heart was enlarge or had an abnormal shape while it pumped.
After that Chopper seemed to have determined the diagnosis. "Okay so there are some good news and bad news. The bad news is that you have developed the broken heart syndrome," at this Zoro was grateful that Chopper wasn't one of those people who would always rub it in and tell him 'I told you so',. "The good news is," Chopper continued, "that it is treatable and there will most likely be no long-term effects."
"What is the treatment then?" Zoro asked
"Well I will prescribe you beta-blockers and it would be better for you and your heart if you stayed away from whatever caused this distress," Chopper said in a serious tone.
"Thanks doc, I knew I could rely on you," Zoro replied before he patted Chopper and finally got up from the bed.
"That doesn't make me happy at all," was what Chopper told him, and yet he was swirling around, looking very happy.
Well that certainly did not go as Zoro had thought. At least he now had a reason to avoid Sanji. Just how would he explain everything to the crew? Zoro thought a lot about it but he had no answer. Thus he decided to deal with it when some kind of intervention actually happened. Not that one of the women would ever do that. Certainly not, but it was best to be prepared if it happened.
While Zoro made his way to the men's sleeping quarter he thought that while he could never regret loving Sanji, he hated how his heart reacted to him. The broken heart syndrome, seriously? Just like always being around the cook made him stupid. First his thoughts and now his heart. What was next? His body?
And if Sanji would ever find out about this, he would make fun of him until their very end. Zoro could not handle that. So he had decided that he would first take a nap. If he was sleeping then his heart wouldn't do stupid things.
If his dream was about Sanji, then nobody needed to know. Not even Zoro even thought about it afterwards, to stop his heart from combusting spontaneously.
When Zoro walked out on deck, he realised that he must have slept through dinner, since the sun was about to set. Well no dinner for him then. Not as if he would starve to death just from missing one meal.
On deck Nami, Robin and Usopp had gathered around a camp fire. They seemed to have a very heated conversation. More like Nami and Usopp were having the conversation and Robin just sat back and listened quietly. Just as Zoro decided that it would be better to find Luffy to relieve Usopp of his Luffy-watching duty, Robin turned around and signed for him to join them.
"So mister swordsman, is there any particular reason that you have been avoiding our cook and decided to visit Chopper today?" Robin asked as soon as Zoro was near enough to hear her question.
"I thought I told you to stop meddling in my business. And I am not avoiding the cook," Zoro told Robin off.
"But now it's not just your business anymore. Now it's starting to affect the crew. Even Luffy is worrying about you," Robin replied, at which both Usopp and Nami looked up.
"You know, I have a lot of money on you so you better confess earlier rather than later. Or would you rather I raise your debt?" Nami asked him.
"Why would I confess? And to whom?" Zoro knew the answers to his questions, he just did not want to admit to himself that he was still in love with that stupid love-cook. Even after he had told himself that after yesterday there would be no more feelings.
"Don't play stupid, it doesn't suit you. You are stupid enough already," Nami retorted.
"To answer your question, you should confess to the one whose picture you stare at every night before going to bed. The one you think about when Brook played the song you requested. The reason why your heart is losing its rhythm. The one who is currently coming out of the kitchen with a drink made for you."
As Zoro processed the Robin's words he slowly turned around to see Sanji with a tray in his hand, looking absolutely delectable. Of course his heart, although it shouldn't have because of Chopper's medication, began to hurt once again, leaving Zoro grasping at his chest. Not now, Zoro thought. Any time would be better than right now. Right in front of the cook too. God this was going to be embarrassing.
When the pain did not stop after a good minute but rather intensified, Zoro had no choice but to curl in on himself, slowly sinking to the deck. Why now? Zoro heard frantic voices, probably talking to him. To understand what was happening. Yet Zoro only felt the pain, everything else was just background noise at this point.
Could his heart ever behave normally around Sanji?
At some point someone must have carried him into the infirmary, because once the pain was finally over and Zoro opened his eyes he was staring at Chopper's worried face, who was staring down at him.
"It's Sanji, isn't it?"
Defeated Zoro sighed before he said, "Yeah, doc. It is Sanji."
"Then my diagnosis has changed, you are officially an idiot. The only way to really treat this, is if you tell him."
"No other way, really?"
"Well as a doctor I could always prescribe you more medicine. But as a friend I see how he looks at you, I see the way you look at him. It is the same look in your eyes. So just confess," Chopper turned on his puppy eyes to try and convince him. Unfortunately for Zoro, he was not immune to them. So all he could do was to do as Chopper said.
"Well, you are discharged now," was the last thing the small reindeer said to him, before Zoro was out of the door already.
As soon as he stepped out of the door the crew had question after question for him, but he ignored those in favour of finding Sanji. Said man was leaning on the railing, smoke surrounding him. No, Zoro was not going to think about how the sunset was reflecting on Sanji's hair and making it seem golden. Or how relaxed his face seemed. How the light rays surrounded him, looking almost like an angel. Or maybe he was an angel. One Zoro was not deserving of.
"So who is it?" Sanji asked as Zoro made his way towards him.
"Who is what," Zoro would deny his feelings to his death.
"The one you were so heartbroken about that you drank almost all of our alcohol stock, leaving you unable to get to your own hammock. The one Chopper was worried would give you a heart disease. The one that broke your heart. The one that actually gave you a heart disease. Should I continue or do you know who I mean, mosshead?"
"No need to continue. But that leaves me wondering, why do you care, curly?"
"Oh, I don't know, maybe because I was the one who had to carry you to your hammock that night. Because I just had to carry you into the infirmary because of your stupid heart. Maybe because I care about you, you dumbass."
Zoro was shocked, he didn't even know the cook actually did not despise him until this very moment. So to hear that Sanji actually cared about him? Yeah that would take time to process.
"Are you going to answer my question any time soon or are you just going to stand there with your mouth open. By the way that looks stupid. Very different from your normally scary look."
At that Zoro closed his mouth. Yeah maybe he could do this. Just confess, right? Chopper said he had a chance. And although he did not believe that, Zoro still indirectly promised him to do it.
"The one I have been in love with for longer than I can remember is you, Sanji," Zoro said, looking directly into Sanji's blue eye. He always could get lost in them. But right now he had to focus on something different, sadly. For example the look on Sanji's face. The look of pure shock. Zoro did not know if that was from the confession or because he had used his name for the first time. Maybe a mixture of both.
"Did you just… Wait you…," Sanji paused for a moment, gathering his thoughts, before continuing, "Oh you absolute asshole!" Okay, not the reaction Zoro thought he would get.
"I wanted to confess first you stupid swordsman." Wait, what? "Ugh, don't tell me that the only reason I was hesitant to confess to you was because you were heartbroken about me?" Zoro's brain screeched to a halt.
"Wait does this mean…"
"Yes I love you too you idiot. You should be glad that I am not able to be too angry at you for ruining my plan of a romantic candlelight dinner, which I would have cooked of course, while I confess my love to you, mossy"
"We can still do that, curly," Zoro could not have hidden his smile even if he had wanted to. Suddenly a thought came to him. "Actually I have a question: Did you actually wear a dress and make-up on Momoiro?"
Sanji looked away, seeming embarrassed. "Yeah, why?"
"Do you still have that dress, curly?"
"Yes, why are you asking all of those questions, mosshead?"
"Just thought that at a candlelight dinner it would be more romantic if one of the ones attending it wore a dress, looking really pretty," Zoro just really wanted to see Sanji in a dress. It was hot, okay?
"Mhh, maybe you can convince me to wear it with a kiss, Zoro."
"If that is what it takes I will gladly do so." Even if there was no Sanji wearing a dress on the line, he would like to kiss Sanji.
Zoro put one of his hands around Sanji's neck, pulling him in for the kiss, the other hand was around Sanji's criminally small waist. Sanji put his hands on Zoro's chest, before their lips touched in a sweet kiss.