Archive of Our Own

The first thing Renjun sees when he steps foot into his apartment is the giant framed photo of him and Jaemin on their wedding day. It’s possibly too large for their small hallway, takes up the entire space so much that they had to remove all the other photos on the wall for it to fit. Renjun had been hesitant to do so, still too attached to the first ever selfie he and Jaemin had taken together all the way back in university. Jaemin always had an issue with the photo—declaring it too grainy and too close to the lens and too this or too that. Renjun, on the other hand, still declares it is his favourite photo on this earth. 

Their wedding was a little over a year ago, so the Jaemin in the frame looks a lot like the Jaemin now. Sharp eyebrows and firm facial features, eyes soft as he gazes into Renjun’s own eyes. Renjun, of course, is bashful as ever in the image, still too shy to look Jaemin in the eyes for too long. Jaemin loves it, even if he teases that Renjun is the least bashful person he knows. It’s a lovely photo, beautiful by Jaemin’s perfectionist terms, and Renjun does love it. But he loves everything that has to do with Jaemin, so maybe he’s being a little unfair there. They are both dressed in tailored suits, courtesy of Renjun’s cousin, Chenle, who had insisted on getting them the finest brands straight from China.

Jaemin’s hair is black, like it had been when Renjun first met him despite it often being other colours in between that. His mother had insisted he dye his hair black for the wedding — it has to look smart, Jaemin-ah. Haven’t you put Renjun through enough? Imagine he has to deal with your bright blue hair in wedding photos, too — Renjun had reassured Jaemin he didn’t mind, but he has always been a mother's boy, so of course Jaemin had listened to her. Renjun’s own hair is blonde in the photos, despite it being brown now. And his smile is bigger than he thinks it’s ever been in his life, even bigger than when Donghyuck finally announced that he and Jeno are taking it slow, despite them having been in love since before Renjun knew either of them. 

But of course it is, Renjun thinks as he tucks his shoes onto the shelf beside Jaemin’s own with sluggish movements, because it was his wedding day. When he married Na Jaemin, for God’s sake. Renjun steps into their home, shoulders finally slumping and tiredness seeping into his bones with every step forward. It’s been a long day, and Renjun is looking forward to crashing face first into bed and burying himself into Jaemin’s arms. (As much as he wants to, he knows Jaemin will make sure he has some resemblance of dinner before he can do any of that).

Renjun shrugs off his coat and shoves it in the cupboard. Jaemin will mutter a complaint under his breath when he notices the mess he’s made but Renjun will just bat his eyes and that will be that. It’s a wonderful understanding they have. The framed selfie from university has been relegated from the hallway walls to Jaemin’s office, a decision Renjun had made to remind Jaemin that sometimes life is about imperfections—even though Jaemin always tells him that’s not really the point of his argument.

(“It’s the framing, Junnie.” Jaemin tries to explain, pointing at their half cut off faces and the way the scarves are so thick that their features go amiss. He sits in his office, on the wheely chair and pouts at Renjun. “It doesn’t even follow the basic rule of three. It’s entirely hypocritical to keep this in my office.”

Renjun rolls his eyes and pinches Jaemin’s ear playfully. “It’s sweet,” he argues with a smile, placing the photo on Jaemin’s desk happily. “Look at your little face.”

Jaemin huffs. “Exactly,” he grumbles. “My scrawny face. That you can barely see.”

“You were twenty,” Renjun defends, a little soured by the way Jaemin puts himself down. “And you were the cutest guy I had ever seen.”

Jaemin turns to him and grins. “And now?” He insists, pulling Renjun onto his lap. He’s on a mission to get the response he wants, which is why he misses the way Renjun yelps in surprise. “Am I still the cutest guy you’ve ever seen?”

Renjun pokes Jaemin’s cheek and smiles earnestly. “You’re the most bothersome man I’ve ever met, actually,” he says simply. Jaemin grins, and before Renjun can fend for himself, Jaemin digs his fingers into his sides until Renjun is breathless and squirming.)

His eyes land on the photo as soon as he tucks a head into the room, blinking slowly at the Jaemin-less office. There are a lot more photos in here, but that’s because Jaemin works from home all the time instead of renting out a studio for all his photographic endeavours. The most obvious is a photo of Renjun from one of their holidays to Paris, and it’s much too large for Renjun’s own comfort but Jaemin says it’s his best work so there’s not much room for argument there. 

“Jaem?” Renjun calls out, stepping away from the office and towards their living room.

It’s empty, which Renjun already knew because he walked past to get to Jaemin’s office. The kitchen is empty too, and just as Renjun wonders if Jaemin is in the bathroom, he hears it: Jaemin’s quiet voice, rushed whispers and then the sound of something scuffling against their floorboards. Renjun moves before he can stop to consider what he might find on the other side of the door. He hesitates just before he opens it, small fingers clutching the handle, definitely too tired to deal with Jaemin and all his antsy spontaneity. 

The handle gives and Renjun steps into the bedroom with a twitchy frown. His lips are twisted into a considerate pout when he finds Jaemin and his pastel pink head of hair crouching by the other side of the bed. His head ducks lower for a second before he springs upwards at once and turns to Renjun with a sweet smile. Which, given Jaemin’s track record, never means anything good. His hair flops into his eyes at the movement and Renjun melts at the sight of him. His glasses are still on, too, which means he left the office without intention because Jaemin very much dislikes wearing his glasses beyond when he needs to (looking at the computer screen) despite however much Renjun thinks he looks cute in them.

“Injun-ah.” Jaemin grins, hands clasped together like he’s giving a presentation. “You know I love you, right?” He asks, not actually letting Renjun answer. There’s another scuffling sound and Renjun takes another step forward, around the corner of the bed where Jaemin is standing. If he takes another then he’ll see what it is his husband is hiding. Jaemin steps out suddenly, hands outstretched and smile wavering.

“Jaemin.” Renjun looks at Jaemin with tired eyes, amping up the sleepiness on his face because if Renjun is weak for Jaemin, then the same is applicable the other way too. It’s probably worse the other way. Renjun uses it to his advantage far too often. 

“Baby. Renjun,” he says, chuckling awkwardly. “I think now would be a really good time to reflect on our wedding vows, you know? Better or worse, sickness and health. Until death, right?”

“Jaemin,” Renjun says slowly, dark eyes and dark voice. Jaemin stands a little straighter, as if his sturdier build and extra height means anything against the hold Renjun has over him. “What is—”

Jaemin’s face falls and Renjun’s question dies in his throat at the stretched out sound of a… a cat? Renjun closes his mouth and stares at Jaemin. 

“You know Jisung, right?” Jaemin starts.

It’s a ridiculous question because of course Renjun knows Jisung. Renjun loves Jisung. The boy is interning under Jaemin so he spends a lot of time in their apartment since Jaemin refuses to rent space. Jisung was literally over last week for Jaemin’s birthday! Renjun crosses his arms over his chest and wishes this is nothing but a dream. He’ll wake up soon and be in Jaemin’s arms and there won’t be something that sounds suspiciously like a cat being hidden behind his husband’s legs. 

“What does Jisung have to do with…” Renjun points to Jaemin’s feet just as another meow is made. He looks at Jaemin with wide eyes. “With that.”

“That,” Jaemin says, finally turning around to lift the small thing in his strong arms and face Renjun again. “Is Luna!” He smiles. 

Renjun blinks. In his arms, Jaemin holds a small, fluffy, kitten that paws at his t-shirt. Instantly, Renjun crumples and squints at the cat. He should be in Jaemin’s arms right now. Not Luna. 

“Right.” Renjun sighs once. “Jaem.” He presses a finger to his temple and massages it slowly, eyes closing as he counts down from ten. “What is this?”

“Well,” Jaemin says, voice already pitched upwards like it usually is when he wants to convince Renjun on something. It had worked when they were nineteen and he asked Renjun out for the first time. He puts Luna down and the kitten scurries off away, almost tripping over Renjun’s feet on her way. Jaemin takes the step forward into his husband’s personal space. “Jisung’s friend’s cat had a bunch of kittens, right? And he was showing me the photos the other day, and I— well, Injunnie,” Jaemin sighs simply. “Isn’t she the cutest?” 

“She’s…” Renjun bites his lip and looks up at Jaemin. “She’s certainly fluffy,” he says weakly. Renjun tries to think of something else to say, something to distract himself from the way Jaemin’s face falls a tiny bit more, but then he thinks of all that fur on his nice pillows and it’s really, really hard for Renjun to lie to Jaemin. “Jaem, darling,” Renjun tries. He reaches forward to pick some of the white fur off Jaemin’s t-shirt, hands lingering over the firmness of his chest, just to touch and feel Jaemin’s warmth. “Tell me you didn’t buy a cat,” he says quietly. “Please?”

Jaemin looks Renjun in the eyes, warm and fuzzy, as he takes Renjun’s small hand in his own, still resting against his chest. 

“Injun-ah,” he says forlornly. “You know I can’t lie to you.”

So Renjun closes his eyes, falls head first into Jaemin’s chest, and groans loudly. “Na Jaemin,” he muffles into the material of his clothes. “You’re so lucky I love you.”

He feels the vibration of Jaemin’s laugh before he hears it. Jaemin presses a kiss to the top of Renjun’s head and then buries his nose in his hair, and takes a deep breath in. It’s odd, but Renjun is used to Jaemin’s odd tendencies by now, and it’s honestly on the more normal side of Jaemin’s behaviour that Renjun doesn’t have the heart to complain. (He actually stopped complaining about Jaemin’s odd behaviour by their fifth date six years ago, but that’s a secret Renjun will take to the grave). And then, just to be evil, Jaemin murmurs a soft coo and smoothes down the hair on Renjun’s head on his way to cupping his cheeks and squishing them together. Renjun blinks at him, unimpressed.

“Băobèi,” Jaemin says, low and soft, delicate and saved for Renjun only to hear. His hands are warm on the skin of his cheeks and Renjun tingles all over. “I’m the luckiest man on this planet.” 

“You bought a cat, Jaemin,” he says. “Why?”

Jaemin grins, slow and steady. His eyes gleam. “I did. She’s just the most adorable little thing, Injunnie. Isn’t she just like milk—?” 

“—you hate milk—”

“—and we’re not really getting any younger, Injun-ah.”

Renjun is aghast. “We’re twenty-five, Jaemin—”

“Jisung’s friend even gave me a discount! And she showed me the photos of her mother and in a few weeks Luna’s grey fur will start to come in—and it’s like practice for when we have a child!”

And that’s… well. It’s a lot. It’s something Renjun is surprised to hear from Jaemin—so much that he feels his head spin on the words until he gets dizzy. It’s not like they’ve never talked about it, but it’s not something they talk about so easily. They are still newly married, in Renjun’s eyes, and while they know they want a family further down the line, this is… 

“That’s not very comparable,” Renjun says gently. “A pet and a child are so different, Jaemin.”

“Right,” Jaemin says easily. Renjun’s head is still spinning. “No, I know that, but—”

Renjun leans forward until he stops Jaemin’s ramble by pressing their lips together. Instantly, he melts against Renjun’s body and pulls him impossibly closer until they are almost fusing into one. Jaemin hums into the kiss, appreciating the sudden change while Renjun leans his entire weight into Jaemin by throwing his arms over his shoulders. He pulls away slowly, barely a centimetre between them, and he can feel Jaemin nuzzling their noses together just the slightest bit. Renjun sighs tiredly, eyes still closed. 

“If she gets her claws into the Dior pillows I’ll make you sleep on the couch for a week.”

Jaemin doesn’t move away, and Renjun feels the way his face contorts into an exaggerated frown.

“Angel, you know I have a bad back,” Jaemin says, too serious for Renjun’s mental capacity. “The couch is far too low for me to sleep on.”

“You’re the one who wanted that couch.” Renjun opens his eyes just to raise an eyebrow at his husband. 

“Have you eaten?” Jaemin asks suddenly, thumbing at the skin under Renjun’s eyes lovingly, tracing his features with softly. “I can make you something while you get refreshed, if you want?”

Renjun pulls Jaemin in again and closes his eyes. He presses the side of his head to Jaemin’s firm chest and revels in the way Jaemin returns the hug without hesitation. 

“I’m tired,” he tells Jaemin in a small voice. “Just hold me first.”

“That same client giving you a headache?” Jaemin asks, voice gentle and coaxing. Renjun buries his face further even though it’s physically impossible. 

“Don’t remind me,” he whines. Jaemin pats the back of his head and placates Renjun. 

“Oh, my baby,” he coos. “You work too hard.”

It’s true, but Jaemin works just as hard. It’s their joint fatal flaw—they’re both stubborn perfectionists. Such is the life when you both pursue your career in the arts, but Renjun wouldn’t have Jaemin any other way. So he hums once and doesn’t argue.

“At least the deal will close soon,” he tells Jaemin tiredly. “After that, he’s the museum’s problem and not mine.”

Jaemin only tightens his arms around Renjun and buries his face in his hair. Silently, he presses another kiss to the skin under his brown tufts of hair. It’s peaceful enough for Renjun to fall asleep right here, standing upright and held in Jaemin’s arms. He sighs softly now, melting further into the embrace until there is a vague sound of scratching that reaches his ears. Renjun bristles, Jaemin notices because he lifts his head and makes a questioning noise. 

“Jaemin.” Renjun mumbles against the material of his t-shirt. He lifts his head slowly and looks towards their open bedroom door in defeat. “I’m pretty sure the cat is scratching the door to your office.”

“Ah.” Jaemin follows Renjun’s line of sight and has the nerve to look sheepish while doing so. “She’s just learning her surroundings,” he says weakly. “Besides, she’s just a kitten, how much damage can she actually do?”

Renjun has to push Jaemin out the bedroom to make sure Luna doesn’t actually ruin their apartment on her first night here. Jaemin goes, but not before pressing a loud mwah to the back of Renjun’s hand, right over his birthmark. 

⚞ • ⚟

“I really appreciate you guys rearranging game night just because of my work schedule,” Jeno says before he’s even through the front door.

Renjun holds it open for him as he bundles inside. Donghyuck is behind him, hands full with the bottle of wine he always insists on bringing ever since he got his first real job in the entertainment industry. Renjun takes it out of his hands so he can also take off his outer layers, and then hugs both of his closest friends as a greeting. 

“Don’t be silly,” Renjun says with a smile. “It’s tradition. We wouldn’t have done it without you here.”

It’s true, because Jeno is usually the one hosting and he never gives them any hassle about availability. The first time he does, has him apologising profusely with red cheeks and bashful eyes, despite both Renjun and Jaemin reassuring him that it’s totally okay. It works in their favour, too, especially since Jaemin is still antsy about leaving Luna at home alone.

Game night has existed since the four of them met at university. Back then, it really had been once a week, filled with games: drinking games, card games, charades, anything to ignore the impending distress of being a student at the time. Now that they are all that much older, far from their nights spent drinking away their neglected assignments, it’s not so much game night anymore–and it’s a huge feat that it’s once a month. It’s more just drink-a-bottle-of-wine-and-complain-about-your-adult-life night. But that’s a little wordy, so game night sticks. 

Jeno gives Renjun a close-mouthed smile before he goes to find Jaemin in the kitchen. Renjun grabs Donghyuck by the arm and waits for a moment before raising an eyebrow. 

“You guys came together?” 

Donghyuck blinks at Renjun. “Is that an innuendo?” He asks back. 

Renjun purses his lips and looks at Donghyuck carefully. It’s never a good sign when he deflects. 

“Hyuck,” Renjun tries. 

“It’s…” Donghyuck trails off, eyes lingering on the empty hallway where Jeno had just been. “I don’t know. I have things to figure out. But I’m getting there,” he says quietly. “You know?”

Renjun nods his head once and throws an arm around his best friend’s shoulder. “Well,” he says lightly. “I think we can keep this bottle for ourselves, hm?”

Donghyuck grins and pulls Renjun closer with a satisfied sigh. “Have I reminded you that you’re my favourite?”

Renjun laughs, bright and awake, as he leads Donghyuck further into the apartment. Jaemin is standing by the stove, head instantly turned to the sound of Renjun’s laughter before their eyes catch each other’s naturally. Renjun flushed with warmth, something unnameable but so familiar yet he doesn’t know what to do with it, even after all these years. He follows Donghyuck to the dining table, cracking open the bottle and pouring a healthy glass each. Donghyuck doesn’t breathe through his sips, and Renjun stops to stare at him in alarm.

“Do we need to talk about this?” Renjun asks.

Donghyuck holds his glass out for a top-up. Renjun obliges. He stares in the general direction of the kitchen where Jaemin and Jeno are. Donghyuck sighs into the glass and takes another large gulp. He doesn’t down it this time, though, so Renjun doesn’t feel too worried.

“He wants me to move in with him,” Donghyuck admits quietly. 

Renjun perks up, eyes wide. “What?” 

Donghyuck glares at him, eyes wider. “Don’t–don’t be so loud!” He hisses in a hushed tone. “It’s…” He sighs once more. “I don’t know.”

“Did you say yes?” Renjun asks. “Is that why you guys came together, are you—”

“It’s complicated,” Donghyuck cuts in tiredly. Renjun blinks at his friend. “I told him I’d think about it. We’ve only been together for, like, a year.”

“You’ve known each other your whole lives,” Renjun supplies.

“It–” Donghyuck closes his eyes and visibly tries to calm himself down. “It’s not the same. You know that.”

“What are we whispering about?” 

Renjun shouldn’t startle at the sound of Jaemin’s voice. He has had many, many years learning Jaemin’s quirks. One of them being that he likes to sneak up on people. And yet. Renjun bristles for a moment, brushing it off as genuine surprise rather than the fact he was working through Donghyuck’s commitment issues. He’s sure Jeno has filled Jaemin in on his own part of the story. They’ll discuss it in bed tonight, probably, but for now, Renjun only looks up at Jaemin and smiles sweetly.

“Nothing,” he says. Jaemin stares at him and his eyes say yeah, right, but his mouth never moves. That’s good enough for Renjun. “Do you need help?”

Jaemin rests a hand on the back of Renjun’s chair and shakes his head. “Jeno’s got it,” he says simply, taking his own seat as Jeno puts the food on the table. 

It’s only mildly awkward between the four of them, because there’s enough conversation to go around that Donghyuck can avoid Jeno’s literal puppy eyes as they eat and drink. Renjun tries not to stare at them too much, to psychoanalyse because everyone tells him he never gets it right, but he cannot help it. He watches Jeno over the rim of his glass, happily in conversation with Jaemin as his eyes trail to Donghyuck. He is staring right at Jeno, looking oddly regretful. Renjun puts his glass down, and turns to his friend, mouth open and ready to ask when he feels a warm hand on his thigh under the table. Renjun turns to Jaemin, eyes wide. 

Jaemin doesn’t even spare him a glance, only squeezes his thigh once, gently, as if to say not now and that’s that. Renjun pouts to himself. Jaemin’s hand doesn’t move, drumming fingertips along the material of Renjun’s nice trousers until he gets the message. Renjun tries not to blush as he tucks a hand beneath the table to hold Jaemin’s own, but it’s a lost cause. At least this way he can blame it on the wine. Jaemin’s fingers curl around Renjun’s hand instinctively, fingertips swiping across his knuckles affectionately, and Renjun catches the sliver of a smile on Jaemin’s face when his smaller fingers return the grasp. 

Donghyuck looks at Renjun and then frowns. “Something’s different,” he says suddenly. His senses do always get freakishly sharper when he drinks. Renjun never gets it. 

“What?” Renjun asks, and the rest of the table falls quiet at the question. He looks around his apartment too, there’s not much he can see from where he is sitting, but he wonders if anything is incredibly out of place for their friends to notice. 

Donghyuck stays quiet, looks around the room and then sighs when he cannot name it. He shrugs his shoulders and shakes his head. “Nevermind.”

They move to the living room when Renjun starts to gather the dishes. Jaemin insists on helping, and Donghyuck makes a retching noise even though he’s the first to gush about their relationship. Renjun urges his friends to go sit inside, and they will only be five minutes. Donghyuck is only slightly hesitant, but Jeno’s puppy eyes have gotten less intense, so Renjun thinks it’s safe to leave them alone for now. Jaemin crowds up into Renjun’s space once they are in the kitchen, dishes left in the sink. He turns and presses back against the counter in surprise.

“Hello,” Renjun says softly.

“Hi,” Jaemin smiles, eyes sparkly, fondness spilling from his gaze. “I missed you.”

Renjun laughs, but his cheeks burn and his heart flops inside his chest. He ducks his head and refuses to look at Jaemin.

“I sat next to you all evening.” 

Jaemin hums and leans closer, into Renjun’s space. He sounds pensive, arms caging Renjun to the kitchen sink, just enough that he can dip lower and press a slow kiss to Renjun’s lips. When he pulls away, he looks thoroughly satisfied, and the darkness in his eyes has lightened significantly. Renjun shoves at his chest and whines helplessly.

“You’re being a bad host,” he says stupidly. 

“It’s just Jeno and Donghyuck,” Jaemin argues easily.

Renjun huffs, but his own fond smile gives him away. “Still. Go make sure they don’t take up our living room with their outdated angst.”

“Fine.” Jaemin pouts, and Renjun leaves another kiss to his cheek for good measure. “Angel,” Jaemin says then, smile suddenly strained. “Rinse the dishes before you put them in the dishwasher.”

Renjun rolls his eyes. “Yes,” he says with a sigh. “I know. I won’t forget this time.” 

It’s a lie, and Renjun definitely would have forgotten if Jaemin hadn’t reminded him, but Jaemin never gloats like that to Renjun, thank god.

When he returns to the living room, Jaemin is eager to pull Renjun close, despite their friends’ awkwardness. Donghyuck sits away from Jeno, clearly intending for one of their friends to fill the space—Renjun, probably, if the extra glass of wine in his hand is anything to go by. Renjun accepts it with a silent thank you. 

Jeno hugs a pillow close to his chest and he seems to be visibly fighting the urge to hide his face in it. The gap remains large, because Jaemin doesn’t let Renjun take the space and holds him close instead. Sort of like Jeno and the pillow, but Jaemin actually does bury his head in the crook of Renjun’s neck and shoulder.

Jaemin looks at Jeno, eyes testing and Renjun pats Jaemin on the arm because he knows what Jaemin is trying to do. It’s unfair to provoke them like this, he thinks, and just as he tries to break the tension, Jeno sneezes.

Donghyuck, halfway to sipping on his wine, barely reacts. “Bless you,” he says softly.

Jeno deflates, and tries to say thank you again, but he is cut off by another sneeze. Donghyuck pauses then. He turns to Jeno with mild concern, close to asking what’s wrong but cuts himself off upon seeing Jeno. Donghyuck’s eyes widen and he shoves his glass of wine into Renjun’s empty hand.

“Why are your eyes so red?” He presses. Jeno looks absolutely bewildered that Donghyuck is even looking at him. “Is that—” Donghyuck stops and takes the pillow from Jeno’s arms. He turns to Renjun and frowns. “You guys changed your pillows? Weren’t they Dior?” 

Jaemin stiffens behind Renjun, useless guilt still plaguing him. Luna most definitely got her claws into the Dior pillows, and Renjun had to hide them somewhere inaccessible so she didn’t ruin them completely. Jaemin did not sleep on the couch, either, because he knows how to tug on Renjun’s heartstrings to get what he wants. It’s the reason they still have Luna, even though Renjun has almost nothing to do with the cat despite Jaemin insisting that they get along. 

“We got new ones,” Jaemin says meekly. 

“Didn’t Renjun spend a fortune on the other ones?” Jeno asks, eyes worse and now his nose is red too. Renjun pushes Jaemin away, suddenly alarmed.

“Jeno,” he says hurriedly. “Are—are you alright? Your skin is…” 

Jeno shakes his head, but he sneezes once more and Donghyuck takes his head in his hands to investigate. “I’m okay. Really. This doesn’t usually happen unless I visit my parents—”

“But that’s because they have a dog. And you’re allergic…” Donghyuck lifts the pillow again and chooses to investigate that instead. He frowns. “Renjun. Is this fur on the pillow?”

Renjun reaches for the pillow and shoves it behind Jaemin. “Um.” Renjun blinks at his friends. “Well,” he says, a little afraid of Donghyuck’s stare. “Jaemin actually adopted a cat last week.”

There’s a considerable amount of silence before Donghyuck bursts into laughter. Renjun sits up, slightly affronted, and Jaemin leans forward into his shoulder again to calm him down. Jeno sniffles once and his cheeks look so blotchy with redness that Renjun doesn’t think it’s a laughing matter. Donghyuck’s laughter dies down far too quickly, his disbelief morphing into something close to stunned.

“You’re not kidding.”

Jaemin shakes his head slowly. “I would never joke about Luna,” he says honestly.

“Wh—” Donghyuck looks at Jeno and then looks at Jaemin. “Why didn’t you tell us?!”

“She’s only a kitten!” Jaemin defends. “I didn’t want to overwhelm her.”

“Where is she?” Jeno asks, genuinely curious. 

“In my office,” Jaemin admits, a little sheepish. “Probably sleeping.”

“Or wrecking your prints,” Renjun snorts.

“She wouldn’t do that to me,” Jaemin says quickly. 

“She stays in Jaemin’s office because she’s still too antsy to be away from us for too long, but Jaemin won’t let her in our room. Fur gets everywhere,” Renjun adds on. “Like on the pillow.”

“Didn’t you grow up with Jeno?” Donghyuck asks, squinting at Jaemin. “Isn’t he your best friend?”

“Um. Yeah?” Jaemin frowns. “Why—?”

“Did you just forget your best friend is allergic to cats and dogs?” 

Renjun turns to Jaemin, appalled. Jaemin blinks at Donghyuck, mouth open to defend himself, but he comes up with no words. Renjun sighs and closes his eyes for a moment. When he opens them again, Jeno is patting Donghyuck on the back to reassure him it’s okay. Donghyuck frowns and looks at Jeno in concern.

“It’s not okay,” he whispers, head tilting in despair. “Look at yourself. You look awful.”

Jeno only smiles, endeared. “Thank you.”

Donghyuck huffs and weakly shoves at Jeno’s arm. “It’s not funny. Seriously.” 

“It’s not a deadly allergy, Hyuckie,” he says gently. “I just got some watery eyes and sneezes.”

“We should get you home,” Donghyuck says instead, already making his mind up. Both Renjun and Jeno pause at the word, although Donghyuck doesn’t notice his own slip up. “The longer you stay, the worse it’ll get.”

Jeno, like a sick puppy, only stares at Donghyuck who is already up and ready to go. He moves slowly, haggard with his allergy and a little hazy over Donghyuck calling his place home, probably. Renjun shoves the glasses of wine in Jaemin’s hands and leaves him on the couch to personally see their friends out. Donghyuck is fussing over Jeno, refusing to let him put his scarf back on because it’ll itch his skin more. Renjun blinks at them and almost laughs. 

“I’m really sorry,” Renjun manages to say with sincerity when Donghyuck is already one foot out the door. He shakes his head as if to dismiss the apology.

Jeno smiles and sniffles. “It’s fine,” he reassures. “Next time I’ll just bring my medication. I can’t wait to meet her, really.”

“Text us when you guys get home,” Renjun says, looking a little too pointedly at Donghyuck.

When the front door closes and Renjun returns to the living room, Jaemin has traded the glasses of wine for a small grey and white kitten who pokes at his nose. Renjun crosses his arms over his chest and tries very hard not to melt at the sound of Jaemin’s gentle voice as he talks to Luna.

“Jeno has a cat allergy,” Renjun says when he gets tired of waiting for Jaemin to look at him.

He lifts his head, eyes shifting into something molten and fond. Renjun’s heart flops around like it’s the first time he’s ever seen Jaemin look at him like that. 

“And a dog one,” Jaemin agrees. “It’s sort of ironic, isn’t it?” He muses. “Jeno, the human puppy, is allergic to cats and dogs.”

There’s a moment of silence where Renjun tries really hard to hold onto his resolve. Jaemin stares back at him, humour and charm swimming beneath his eyes. Renjun thinks he could stand his ground. If it weren’t for the begrudgingly adorable fluffball on his chest that keeps poking at Jaemin’s face as he stares at Renjun with barely contained laughter. The white fur of her paw mixes in Jaemin’s already fading pink hair. It’s an entirely unfair fight. Renjun sighs in defeat.  

“How did you not remember that?” Renjun asks, curling up on the couch beside Jaemin.

His cheek rests on Jaemin’s shoulder, cushioned and comfortable. Silently, his arms wind their way around Jaemin’s bicep and he stares down at Luna sleepily. The kitten prods at the back of Renjun’s hand, her paw barely bigger than the round circle of his birthmark. She presses her nose into it, practically forcing Renjun to pet her head. 

“You heard him,” Jaemin defends. “It’s not anything serious.”

“All allergies are serious, baby,” Renjun murmurs into Jaemin’s shoulder. 

Luna crawls across Jaemin’s arm to jump over Renjun’s shoulder. He briefly wonders if the kitten is finally letting Renjun have Jaemin to himself, eager to cosy up to his husband after the evening they’ve had. Jaemin melts against Renjun, cooing into the crown of his head. Luna burrows herself between Jaemin and Renjun, little paws pushing into the small space until she is almost entirely hidden from their view. Jaemin drags a hand over her small spine. Renjun feels her purr vibrating against his ribcage. It’s nice for a moment, until Renjun feels her paws tugging incessantly at something between them.

He moves away quickly, despite Jaemin’s whines of protest. Renjun blinks at Luna and picks her up before her claws get into these pillows too. 

“You picked up the world’s naughtiest cat,” he tells Jaemin.

Jaemin pouts, taking Luna from Renjun’s hands. “No,” he says petulantly. “I got the world’s cutest cat,” he grins. Renjun stares at both of them in defeat. Jaemin lifts Luna’s paw and waves at Renjun. “See?” He presses, voice hiked up ten pitches. “Luna-yah,” Jaemin calls, “say hi to your bàba. Say hi to her, Injunnie.”

Renjun glowers at Jaemin. “That’s not fair,” he whines. Jaemin only laughs at his misery. 

⚞ • ⚟

Renjun likes his work. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have dedicated himself to a bachelor’s degree and a master’s degree in it. All in all, Renjun loves what he does for a living. And he likes the luxury it gives him. That much isn’t a secret to anyone. Renjun likes to dress up and his job lets him. It’s one of his favourite things about what he does. When they were in university, Renjun used to wear rings of all shapes and sizes. Donghyuck used to make fun of him. 

Now, Renjun only really wears his wedding ring. Jaemin, of course, knows Renjun so well that he got the perfect ring. It’s simple, but still somewhat eye-catching that Renjun doesn’t get tired of looking at it. He’s not really materialistic. It’s just that he likes the fact he is probably the only person on this planet who gets to experience the full force of Jaemin’s thoughtfulness—and there is a lot of it.

Recently, though, Renjun isn’t the only thing Jaemin dedicates his undivided attention to. 

He shouldn’t be on his phone during opening exhibitions. Especially not for this client because they have already been a huge pain in the backside that Renjun wouldn’t want them to see and file a complaint. But after tonight, this client is no longer Renjun’s concern, and the night has gone on long enough that he thinks it’s safe to check his messages.

Usually, Jaemin accompanies Renjun for these work events. Jaemin doesn’t drink very much, but he reserves his one glass of champagne in the year for one of Renjun’s events. By now, he’d be nursing the flute and trying not to grimace each time he takes a sip of the fizzy drink. Tonight, however, Renjun insisted on Jaemin staying home with Luna. She’s still far too young to be left alone, after all. Renjun sighs forlornly, and stares at the messages waiting for him.

He’s not surprised to find a list of messages from Jaemin. The flush of warmth that rushes through him upon finding so is welcomed and Renjun feels an unnecessary tear spring to his eye. 

Jaem

Good luck angel

[5 attachments]

Luna says good luck too!!!

Love you

Renjun scans the plethora of heart emojis and cat emojis and kissy face emojis with warm cheeks. There are about three selfies of Jaemin with Luna. One of them is so rushed it’s more of a blur of pink hair and white fur than anything else. He’s wearing his glasses which means he is in his office working, even though Renjun begged him not to overwork himself just because he’s staying home. Jaemin’s own work schedule is a lot more flexible than Renjun’s, considering he tends to devise pieces for his staff to handle and rarely takes actual clients for himself. He still likes to take photos in his spare time and edit them as if he were his own client. Renjun holds back a snort, looking through the too-close images of Luna’s little face as she is obviously staring at Jaemin and not the camera. 

For someone who is so stingy with the quality of his work, Jaemin is far too jaded when it comes to photos of Renjun—and Luna, it seems. 

“Aw.” A voice coos from over Renjun’s shoulder, too close to his ear. Renjun flinches, and blinks up at the person. “You got a cat?”

“Jaemin got a cat,” Renjun corrects.

Mark is Renjun's assistant, which he told everyone he didn’t need yet the company insisted on giving him one. Now, as Renjun tucks his phone back into his pocket and stares at his assistant who holds out a champagne flute for Renjun to take, he thinks it was a really good decision to have Mark on his side. 

“That’s cute,” he says easily. “You guys are parents now. Aw.” 

Renjun’s eyebrow twitches. He turns to Mark with a frown. “A pet and a child are not the same.” Renjun finds it absurd he has to make this point twice in the span of two months. 

“Well, no,” Mark agrees because he’s just too agreeable like that. He blinks at Renjun and shrugs his shoulders. “Though it’s not much different these days.”

Renjun looks ahead at the small crowd in the museum. It’s a closed-off event, not really open to the public because his client was difficult about being seen by too many people even though his work is admired by so many. He scans the crowd as if it has the answer he’s looking for. Mark nudges him once and grins boyishly.

“What’s its name?”

“Luna,” Renjun answers. “She’s not even six months old yet. That’s why Jaemin stayed home tonight.” He takes a sip of his champagne and lets the fizz help his tension headache. “She’s too scared when we leave her alone. We went grocery shopping together and she tore up his office door while we were gone.”

“I was wondering where he was,” Mark says. “J-man loves these things.”

Renjun purposely ignores the nickname. Sometimes he doesn’t understand how Mark is older than him with the way he acts. Times like this, Jaemin would tuck his hair behind his ear and tell Renjun he’s being too tense for no reason. But Renjun has a reason. He misses Jaemin. He thinks that’s an incredibly valid reason, too. 

Jaemin doesn’t love these things. Not really. What Jaemin does love is being able to stand tall by Renjun’s side as people tell him he did a fantastic job organising the exhibition or that Renjun has an astonishingly impressive eye for art. He loves being able to soak in praise just because it’s about Renjun. And Renjun misses him so much, more than usual. 

“Yeah,” Renjun mumbles, watching the crowd disperse bit by bit.

Mark pats him on the shoulder and waits for Renjun to look up at him. “You can head out early,” he says kindly. “If you want.”

Renjun blinks at Mark. “I shouldn’t,” he says, but he doesn’t sound like he is putting up much of a fight. “Right?”

Mark shrugs his shoulders and scans the crowd for himself. “It’s pretty much over, anyways,” he tells Renjun. “Most of the main faces have come and gone.”

It’s true. This is the time of the night where Jaemin is burying his forehead into Renjun’s expensive clothes and mumbling about going home and other sweet nothings that always get Renjun all hot and bothered. He feels his phone buzz with what can only be another text from Jaemin. Renjun is only human. He turns to Mark and nods his head determinedly.

“Thanks, Mark,” he smiles. “I owe you for this.”

He doesn’t spare time to hear his assistant’s response. Renjun is out of the museum and into one of the taxis lobbied on the street before he gets another text from Jaemin. It doesn’t take very long to get back to their apartment, something Renjun is thankful for. He pays the fare and wishes the taxi driver a good night before stepping out. Renjun’s fingers push at the elevator buttons and counts the seconds until he is keying in the pin for his and Jaemin’s apartment door to open. 

The photo from their wedding greets him first. Then, Renjun hears the sound of Jaemin’s office door opening before he can get his shoes off. 

“Angel?”

Renjun lifts his head at the sound of Jaemin’s voice. He stands up straight, only one shoe off and coat still on as he stares at Jaemin’s surprised face. Jaemin’s hair is a mess, sticking up in ways that means he’s been running his hands through his hair. Renjun blooms with something close to relief. Jaemin, in his old t-shirt and glasses crooked on his nose, Luna in his arms and they both peer at Renjun with wide eyes.

“Hi,” Renjun says, voice softer than he expected it to be. “I missed home, so I left early. Mark promised to take care of things over there.”

Jaemin visibly softens at the sound of Renjun’s voice, letting Luna patter across the floor and back into the living room where her small climbing tree is. The little thing is very interested in climbing these days. Renjun had to stop her from trying to jump into their kitchen sink while he was rinsing dishes the other day.

Jaemin takes three large steps into the foyer until he is face to face with Renjun. His hands hover over Renjun’s face for a second before he finally holds Renjun’s cheeks tenderly in his palms. Jaemin smiles softly, something different to his normal smile, something more gentle—the type that makes him more like a bunny than usual. 

“We missed you, too,” Jaemin says, just as soft. Renjun’s chest burns and his throat feels oddly clogged with something emotional. He leans forward until his and Jaemin’s foreheads are touching. Renjun inhales deeply and exhales slowly, eyes closed. “You okay, băobèi?”

Renjun is tired and a little bit hazy on the edges of champagne-drunk, so he falls face first into Jaemin’s chest and takes a long breath in. Jaemin, obviously, is not at all perturbed by this phenomenon. Renjun can tell because his chest rumbles with fond laughter. 

“Angel?” Jaemin tries, fingers carding through the back of Renjun’s hair. 

“Hm?” Renjun’s response is muffled and monotone. He takes another inhale before lifting his eyes and looking at Jaemin. “Oh,” he mumbles tiredly, reaching outwards to pat at the muted glitter on Jaemin’s clothes, and picks off some of Luna’s fur while he’s at it. “Sorry. I got makeup on your t-shirt.”

“Eh,” Jaemin shrugs his shoulders. Which isn’t his average response considering Jaemin favours tidiness a lot more than Renjun does. He’s being softer on him than usual and Renjun silently appreciates it. “That’s alright.”

Renjun, still in his coat and still wearing only one shoe, looks at Jaemin. “I love you,” he says gently. “You know that, right?”

Jaemin’s soft smile turns even softer. He tucks a piece of Renjun’s hair behind his ear and presses a firm kiss to his forehead. “Of course I do. And I love you,” he promises, words lost in the tufts of Renjun’s hair. And then he’s helping Renjun take his coat off, tucking it away in their cupboard while Renjun finishes taking his shoes off. “Come on,” Jaemin urges, voice dipping into that saccharine sweet thing he uses on Jisung when his intern needs help. “I’ll make you a hot chocolate.”

Renjun follows him into the kitchen, their presence alerts Luna and she jumps up onto the counter to join Jaemin. Naturally, Renjun reaches for her and pulls her down. His arms circle around her little frame and Renjun even lets her nudge her way under his chin. Luna nuzzles his chin eagerly, her paws trying to reach outwards and climb over Renjun’s shoulder. He pats over her back, the little space on the bridge of her nose, heart melting at the sight of her. 

Jaemin switches Luna for the hot chocolate. She immediately urls up in Jaemin’s arms, burrowing into his chest, and releases a hollow purr. The sight is sweeter than the hot chocolate that coats Renjun’s tongue. Jaemin presses his cheek to the top of Luna’s head and stares at Renjun. 

“How was the opening?” He asks, his voice a low rumble. 

“Those things are never as fun when you’re not there,” Renjun admits.  

It’s easy for him to do now. When they first started dating, Renjun had found himself in denial of how scarily easy it is to feel at home with Jaemin. He had been nineteen and new to the country—let alone new to university. Renjun hardly thought he’d finish university and choose to stay for his master’s afterwards; the plan had been to get his degree and return to China for his master’s—but Renjun hardly anticipated meeting someone like Jaemin. Someone so unpredictable it made Renjun clam up, but he was as reliable as he was unpredictable, and Jaemin had proven that to Renjun when he first asked him out almost ten years ago. Jaemin will always feel like home to Renjun, and maybe that’s why Renjun can only cope with change when Jaemin is by his side to guide him through. It had been infuriating and frustrating for Renjun at first. He prides himself on being incredibly self-reliant, not one to ask for the things he wants or needs, but Jaemin had come along to coax those things out of Renjun. It had taken him a full year and a half to finally call Jaemin his boyfriend when Jaemin had happily been calling Renjun his boyfriend a week after their first date. 

Renjun had caught up to Jaemin eventually, and now when Jaemin has one of his bursts of unpredictability, he already knows how to ease Renjun into it. Even with Luna. Jaemin had been preparing a whole ordeal to introduce her—Renjun had just come in too quietly for Jaemin to get there in time. He still went through the introduction; at night as they lay in bed that very evening, Jaemin carefully explained each little bit he already knew Renjun would point out about adopting a pet. 

So they get each other. Renjun thinks that’s the most important part. Renjun knows that Jaemin needs space when he’s working and that he needs coffee before he can have a fully cooperative conversation in the mornings. Jaemin knows that Renjun needs to talk things out or else he’ll overthink himself into a never-ending spiral of anxiety. He knows that Renjun misses his childhood home more than anything so he asked Renjun’s mother to send his grandmother’s vase just so he can still see it everyday. Discusses dumpling soup recipes with her so Jaemin can cook them for Renjun and he can come home from work and the apartment would smell like his house did when he’d come home from school. 

Renjun knows Jaemin’s love for him will never waver and Jaemin knows he is Renjun’s safe space. 

Renjun knows Jaemin will always kiss him, even if he can taste the hot chocolate on his tongue despite hating the flavour of milk. Just because he’s reliable like that. Because he loves Renjun that much. Renjun will pull Jaemin close and curl a small hand in Jaemin’s hair because he knows Jaemin is incredibly fond of the way Renjun has to tiptoe to kiss him back.

Before they sleep at night, when Renjun is murmuring words into his pillow and slowly losing coherency, Jaemin will reach for his hand to brush his lips against Renjun’s birthmark, like always. It’s a habit he picked up very early on in their relationship, when he noticed Renjun would pick at the skin beside his nails out of nervousness. Jaemin hadn’t even noticed he did it until Renjun mentioned it once, in the middle of their first exam season while dating. They had both been exhausted and Jaemin had been on his seventh iced americano of the day, so jittery that Renjun remembers having to hold his hands to calm him down, kissing the back of them like Jaemin did to him. When Renjun told Jaemin why he did it, he had flushed a sweet shade of pink, similar to the one on his head right now.

Renjun had decided from that moment on, sleep-deprived and harrowed down by exams, that he would be happy for the rest of his life as long as he got to be with Jaemin. And when he slides into bed with Jaemin tonight, Renjun feels himself smiling into his pillow as Jaemin presses a chaste kiss to the back of his hand. 

⚞ • ⚟

With Renjun’s biggest project finally being completed, he has a good few weeks where work doesn’t weigh him down. He had spent the first week catching up on sleep, too sleepy to entertain Jaemin or Luna. By the second week, Renjun is slowly coming back into his world. Jaemin, however, spends most of his days out with Jisung, taking care of an important deal with a potential client. It’s the first time in three weeks Jaemin gets to go out, so Luna stays at home with Renjun, who spends his days watching movies (don’t tell his boss) or replying to emails. 

Jaemin is still home most days of the week, though, because he is still paranoid about having Luna out of his sight. It would bother Renjun more, but right now he’s a little preoccupied with Jaemin himself, so there’s nothing to complain about just yet. 

There will be soon, though, if Jaemin doesn’t get on with it.

He huffs a breathy laugh over Renjun’s collarbone. Renjun feels Jaemin’s teeth on his skin as he grins, too amused for Renjun’s composure. 

“I thought you were kinder than this, Injun-ah,” Jaemin chides, voice low and teasing.

Normally, Renjun would have a quip or two up his sleeve. Normally, as in: not in bed with Jaemin’s hands under his shirt, fingernails barely scraping the skin over his ribcage. Renjun aches for Jaemin to do something more than barely brush his thumb over his chest, head thrown back and eyes screwed shut. His shirt is half open, from the bottom when Jaemin had been slowly coaxing Renjun to this state of pliancy. It should make Renjun lock up in discomfort, how easily he gives in to Jaemin’s advances, but Renjun has long since made peace with how easy it is to do anything that involves Jaemin. 

So he chokes on a muffled whine, and barely opens his eyes to blink up at Jaemin. His eyes are dark and trained on Renjun. He can almost see it in real time, the way Jaemin is seriously committing this image to memory. It makes Renjun’s cheeks burn. He moans when Jaemin slides a rough hand down the side of his body, slipping out from under his shirt. 

“If you rip the buttons, you’re buying me a new shirt,” Renjun says, but his words are too watery to be heard with any real conviction. 

Jaemin presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth and pulls away with a grin. Arousal settles deeply in the pits of Renjun’s stomach when he sees all of Jaemin’s teeth on display, swallowing back a moan as Jaemin runs a tongue beneath them all. Like he’s about to fucking devour Renjun. 

“Don’t worry,” Jaemin says, but his tone implies Renjun should definitely worry. “I’ll buy you two.” And then Jaemin’s tugging Renjun’s shirt enough that at least two of the buttons pop open. There was absolutely no need to do all that, but Renjun whimpers in response and that’s all Jaemin wanted. “Now,” he starts, in that frustratingly placating manner. Jaemin gazes at Renjun’s bare torso like it’s his dream come true. Renjun squirms only slightly, still uselessly shy under Jaemin’s intense stare. Jaemin grins, satisfied. “Let’s try this again, shall we?”

Renjun shudders with goosebumps that line his skin as Jaemin’s fingertips trace his lines. He knows Renjun’s body possibly better than he knows his own, and yet he always takes his dedicated time to break Renjun down until he is begging, as if this is the first and only chance Jaemin will get to do so. Sometimes Jaemin is softer on him, sometimes Jaemin has his own level of impatience, but not this afternoon, it seems. This afternoon, Jaemin nibbles on the skin of Renjun’s neck, right where his pulse throbs with anticipation, and swallows each of Renjun’s cries before he even touches him properly. 

“Jaemin.” Renjun bites on his own lips, chases Jaemin with them when he pulls away to take his own clothes off. Jaemin presses Renjun back down with one hand to his hips. Renjun writhes and moans over nothing. “Please.”

Jaemin’s kisses are hot and wet as he mouths his way down Renjun’s chest, right to his navel. Renjun whimpers and whines and Jaemin soaks in each sound like it’s his favourite song. He moves lower, hands spreading Renjun’s legs wider with a palm flat against the smooth surface of his skin. Renjun trembles beneath the touch, easily opening up as Jaemin bites down on the skin, teeth sharp and hungry. It stings, makes something hot stir in Renjun’s stomach and his untouched length twitches pathetically.

Renjun moans, loud and wonton, back arching upwards into Jaemin’s chest. The stretch of Jaemin’s smile is slow, his eyes are dark and his own resolve is no better than Renjun’s despite the calm facade he puts on. Renjun can see the way his eyebrows fidget with the way he stares at Renjun so strongly. Jaemin’s hands are antsy to touch everywhere—over Renjun’s thighs, bending his knee to almost fold him in half, across his face as he caresses the back of his hand over Renjun’s cheekbones with a fondness that chokes Renjun up.

“Look at you,” Jaemin purrs, low and rumbly. Renjun whines at the sound. “So pretty…”

“Jaem,” Renjun breathes, eyes barely open. He stretches his arms around Jaemin’s neck and pulls him down for a very uncoordinated kiss. 

Jaemin licks right into Renjun’s mouth, tongue pushing past the barriers, so much that Renjun feels the slightest bit of drool gather at the corner of his mouth. Jaemin pulls away and replaces his tongue with three fingers, tapping Renjun’s lips expectantly. 

“Open up, baby,” he says through thinly veiled constraint.

On command, Renjun’s lips open wide and Jaemin presses all three fingers to his tongue experimentally. Renjun swallows them in, mouth closing around Jaemin’s fingers with another greedy moan. Jaemin takes and takes and takes and Renjun is more than willing to give. His mind drifts elsewhere, somewhere where all he sees and hears and feels is Jaemin. He whimpers when Jaemin removes his fingers from his mouth. Renjun digs his blunt nails into the firm skin of Jaemin’s shoulders when he pushes one finger past his entrance, curving upwards into Jaemin’s hold instinctively. It’s nowhere near enough, Renjun pushes back against Jaemin’s finger almost immediately, silently begging for more. 

Jaemin trails the skin of Renjun’s throat and bites down to stop himself from commenting on how needy Renjun gets. He’s three fingers in, knuckle deep, coaxing Renjun open with soft kisses to his tear-stained cheeks as he curls his fingers with practiced ease. Renjun gasps, twists on top of the sheets and shudders with the force of Jaemin’s thrusts.

“Jaem—Jaem.” Renjun chokes back a moan, grapples for something to hold onto. “I’m close.”

Jaemin curls his fingers some more, scissors his fingers before angling his thrust expertly into Renjun. He moans loudly, writhing under Jaemin’s body and begs through his sobs.

“Baby,” Jaemin coos, brushing the sweaty hair off Renjun’s forehead gently. “I can’t help if you don’t tell me what you need.”

“You,” Renjun answers reflexively. He looks into Jaemin’s eyes, dazed and strung tight. “Want you. Need you.”

“I’m right here,” Jaemin whispers lovingly. 

“Please,” Renjun whines, hips stuttering with exertion. Jaemin rests his other hand on Renjun’s hip, pressing down with mild strength to stop Renjun’s movements. The restriction sends Renjun deeper into his daze, blinded by the pressure. “Jaemin-ah.”

“I got you,” Jaemin coaxes in a low voice. “Show me how much you need me. Come on, baby, I got you.” 

His hand curls around Renjun’s hard length and tugs once before he spills over his own stomach with Jaemin’s name spilling from his lips. Jaemin’s fingers stop thrusting when Renjun starts to twitch uncomfortably. He paces them into a languid movement, a slow drag in and out until Renjun is sniffling into Jaemin’s neck. 

“More,” he whines. “Jaemin.” Renjun lifts his head to look into Jaemin’s eyes. “Need more.”

Jaemin chuckles, presses a kiss to Renjun’s cheek. “So needy, love,” he says before he can stop himself.

Renjun whines in protest, but it’s lost in impact because he searches for Jaemin’s lips with his own and kisses him slowly. Jaemin takes his time, lets Renjun take his time too, pulling away only a fraction to catch their breaths. Renjun blinks up at Jaemin, melting against the sheets as Jaemin flutters his eyelashes at Renjun sweetly. 

“Hi,” Renjun whispers, eyes closing as Jaemin tucks his hair behind his ear. “I love you.”

Jaemin hums, presses a kiss to Renjun’s forehead. “I love you back.” He tests a thrust into Renjun, fingers spread out and purposefully avoiding his sweet spot. Renjun moans quietly, forehead pressed into Jaemin’s collarbone. “You want more, angel?” 

Renjun nods his head blindly, too shy to vocalise what he wants when Jaemin is so micro-focused on him like this. Jaemin kisses him once, unhurried but chaste as he pulls his fingers out and muffles Renjun’s whines back into his throat. It seems Jaemin has met his patience for the day, because he doesn’t warn Renjun once before lining himself up and slowly easing in. The only tell is that he stops kissing, lips just brushing Renjun’s as he bites back a low moan. Jaemin falls forward, biting down on Renjun’s shoulder to ground himself. Renjun gasps quietly, already hard and leaking again, pulling Jaemin in like he was always meant to be here. Always meant to be connected to Renjun in the most intimate and vulnerable way. 

“You’re so beautiful,” Jaemin says, voice warm and thick with reverence. Renjun moans, tightens his thighs around Jaemin’s waist and locks him in. “Renjun.”

“Jaemin.” Renjun’s own voice is choked up and desperate. “Let me feel you,” he just about whispers, pressing his forehead to Jaemin’s noses barely touching, mouths breathing the same air. 

Jaemin doesn’t pull out all the way, he barely pulls out at all, slowly rocking into Renjun with soft groans at each movement. Renjun’s breaths hitch at first, and then he’s pitching higher in gasps, burying his face in Jaemin’s neck. Eventually, Jaemin loses interest in the slow pace, finally snapping his hips upwards into Renjun, almost jolting the bed with his movements. Renjun moans and whimpers and Jaemin chases that sound. When Renjun starts to loosen his grip on Jaemin, words and cries becoming mumbled, he wraps a hand over his length. Renjun’s entire body twitches with the touch, crying out in desperation. 

“Jaemin,” he cries, small fingers curling around Jaemin’s hair to tug at the lengths. 

Jaemin’s hand slides up once, squeezing the tip ever so slightly. “I’m right here,” he promises Renjun. “Renjun-ah.”

Jaemin’s own hips stutter, movements becoming haste as he feels his own climax twisting at the bottom of his gut. He grits his teeth, working Renjun up, breathing in each of his breathy moans until Renjun is clutching at Jaemin’s shoulders. 

“Wanna—wanna come together,” Renjun manages to tell Jaemin. He doesn’t open his eyes, barely holds his own head up, burying one cheek in between the pillow and Jaemin’s bicep where he holds himself up. Renjun moans. “Jaemin. Wanna come together.”

“Okay,” Jaemin whispers back. He presses his nose into Renjun’s exposed cheek and nuzzles it gently. “I’m there,” he tells him. “You ready, baby?”

Renjun nods his head once. He chokes on a stretched out moan when he feels Jaemin bury himself into Renjun. There's a moment of stillness between them before Jaemin moans brokenly, and Renjun feels his warmth flood him almost immediately after. Renjun doesn’t have much energy left, just enough to whimper out Jaemin’s name before he comes. He feels sticky and sweaty and tired, barely waiting for Jaemin to pull out before he flops onto his side and tries to catch his breath. Jaemin rests a hand on Renjun’s hip, smoothing a palm over the surface indulgently. 

“You’re so good,” he tells Renjun softly, pressing an even softer kiss to his temple. Renjun makes a strangled noise, reaching out for Jaemin with his hand. He taps Jaemin’s hand on his hip, fingers pushing through Jaemin’s own until he gets the message. Jaemin, of course, understands instantly. He takes Renjun’s hand in his own and presses a kiss to it. “You want a shower, angel?”

Renjun shakes his head. “Not yet. Tired. Stay here.”

Jaemin laughs, more endeared than anything else. “That’s alright. You can rest.”

He settles beside Renjun, unperturbed by the mess on his stomach as pulls him in close and presses another kiss to the top of his head. Renjun sighs softly. Vaguely, behind the lowering haze of his climax, Renjun picks up on the sound of an agonised meow. He pauses, hands firm where he holds Jaemin’s forearms around his frame. Renjun doesn’t open his eyes.

“Let her be,” he says. 

Jaemin hesitates. Renjun can tell by the way he doesn’t fully rest the weight of his arms in the embrace. “She might be hungry.”

“She’s not,” Renjun reassures. He knows because he fed her before Jaemin got home less than an hour ago. Still, Jaemin is like yarn in Luna’s paws, strung to her desires. He kisses the side of Renjun’s head as he sighs, already forlorn with defeat. “I’m going to shower,” he tells Jaemin as he hears him shuffling on his sweatpants. 

Jaemin, still shirtless, rounds the bed and comes into Renjun’s view. It’s entirely unfair, he thinks sourly, eyes glazing over the firm dips of Jaemin’s chest and abs. He pouts, just to make Jaemin’s resolve waver a little bit. He’s always been a bit bratty after sex, but he thinks he’s allowed a pass now more than ever. Jaemin coos, leans down once more just to kiss Renjun’s nose. It’s disrupted by the insistent sound of claws scratching at their bedroom door. Luna meows again, just as Jaemin opens their bedroom door to greet her. 

Renjun flops over in their bed, tangled in the sheets. It’s not like they haven’t had a chance to be together like this since getting Luna a month ago, but it’s usually been at night when she’s fast asleep to bother them. He finds energy to drag himself into the shower, feeling satiated despite having to sacrifice post-sex cuddles. Renjun even rifles through the drawer to wear Jaemin’s old hoodie from before they even moved in together. It doesn’t even fit Jaemin anymore because he’s long since committed himself to the gym, but he keeps it around just because Renjun used to wear it all the time when they first started dating. 

Jaemin is still shirtless and cradling Luna to his chest when Renjun walks out of their bedroom. He looks up instantly, eyes softening, smile warm and cossetting. Renjun feels as small in the hoodie as he did six years ago, smiling at Jaemin in the same way he had then. 

“Hi, gorgeous,” Jaemin greets. Luna reaches for his messy pink hair and barely gets a paw in it before Jaemin is redirecting her interest. “How was the shower?”

“Fine,” Renjun says gently. He stares at Luna in Jaemin’s arms, heart twisting and flopping over at the heartwarming sight. “You might need to change the pink before she pulls all your hair out.”

Jaemin pouts. “She wouldn’t do that.”

As if on cue, Luna reaches for Jaemin’s scalp once again. Renjun laughs. He pulls Luna away, setting her on the floor and slotting himself into Jaemin’s arms instead. 

“I love you,” Renjun says with exaggerated exasperation, looking up at Jaemin and combing his fingers through his messy hair. “But please don’t let our cat make you go bald. You indulge her too much.”

“Aw.” Jaemin grins, all mushy and lovestruck. “You love me,” he echoes. Renjun rolls his eyes but smiles all the same. 

“Don’t be silly,” he mumbles, cheeks warm. “You know I do.”

Jaemin’s grin turns mischievous. “Do I?” He teases. Renjun tries to step away, groaning dramatically when Jaemin’s arms tighten around him eagerly. “Come on, Injun-ah,” Jaemin presses. “How much do you love me? Wouldn’t you love me even if our cat pulled all my hair out.”

Renjun fidgets and squirms. Jaemin’s hold doesn’t let up. He groans again. 

“Of course I would,” he relents. Jaemin smiles, satisfied, but he doesn’t let go of Renjun. “I would just also prefer it if my husband didn’t go bald at twenty-five.”

Jaemin’s face melts like it always does whenever Renjun mentions their marital status. He has a much braver emotional stance than Renjun. All of Jaemin’s emotions show on his face, he wears his heart on sleeve. Renjun, on the other hand, holds his emotions at arms length and doesn’t let people close enough to see his heart is just as soft as Luna’s kitten fur. Jaemin sees right through Renjun. He always has. Maybe that’s what set Renjun off about Jaemin in the first place, untrusting that there really is someone out there in this world that can make Renjun’s walls crumble with just one glance into his warm, brown eyes. 

So Jaemin’s face melts and his teasing grip on Renjun melts just as well. He stares at Renjun, teeth poking out as he smiles. Renjun’s heart stammers in his chest as Jaemin kisses his forehead with a loud smacking sound, still smiling. 

“We’ll see,” Jaemin says, because he is still as stubborn as Renjun when it comes to his choices. It’s still more than he lets anyone else have, though, so Renjun lets it slide. 

⚞ • ⚟

Jaemin does choose to dye his hair, but the choice comes three weeks later, just before Renjun’s mother calls and tells them Chenle will be visiting for a business trip. Usually, his cousin insists on finding his own place to stay—God knows he has the money for it, too. But Renjun has always had a soft spot for his younger cousin, always had a soft spot for hosting friends and family, so he still extends the offer this time around too, almost out of habit. He is, however, surprised to hear Chenle agree without any qualms. 

“That’s a first,” Jaemin croaks, eyes barely open and freshly dyed dark hair matted to his head.

 He nurses his abominable mug of coffee in his hands, the steam curls around their kitchen and Renjun watches it with mild fascination. For someone who hates the cold weather, Jaemin still prefers iced americanos, no matter what. Even when Renjun had taken him home for new years once and Jaemin experienced what he still deems the coldest winter of my life, he was drinking iced americanos. Renjun can smell the coffee from where he sits, because Jaemin needs an inhumane amount for no reason other than that he genuinely likes the taste.

He’s recovering from a cold. One that left him so bedbound he had to ask Jisung to cover for him and his roots came through so much that he relented and let Renjun dye his hair black again. It’s why he is drinking hot coffee, much to his own chagrin. 

“I know,” Renjun agrees. “I think he just wants to meet Luna.”

The cat sits by her glass bowl, face first in her kibble. Renjun had been overly concerned about it in the first few weeks of adopting Luna. So much that he asked the vet five times if that was normal. They said as long as she wasn’t suffocating or overeating, then it shouldn’t be a problem. Renjun didn’t like that answer, but he still kept an eye on her religiously until he realised Luna just likes to rest with half her tiny face in her bowl. He turns to face Jaemin again, blinking in awe as his husband has practically half of his face in his mug of coffee. Renjun feels ridiculous he hadn’t noticed she got the habit from Jaemin. 

At the sound of her name, the cat perks up ever so slightly, just enough to twitch her whiskers but she doesn’t move. She’s only sulking because Jaemin is avoiding her since he didn’t want to pass on his cold, even though he looks physically pained to do so. Renjun tilts his head at Jaemin. 

“Are you sure you’re feeling better?” 

Jaemin blinks back at Renjun, eyes puffy but otherwise looking a lot less sickly than earlier this week. He nods his head once. “Totally. It’s just a blocked nose, babe.”

Renjun tries not to coo at how nasally Jaemin sounds. “We can reschedule if you like.”

“No,” Jaemin shakes his head, reaching for Renjun’s hand. “We’ve had this reserved for months, Injun-ah. It’s your birthday present.”

Renjun’s birthday was nine months ago. It’s closer to his twenty-sixth than his twenty-fifth, but Jaemin really didn’t estimate it to be so difficult to book a dinner at the restaurant Renjun has been eyeing up for the past six months. By the time he got around to booking a reservation for Renjun’s birthday and the earliest possible date was for December, well. It’s safe to say Jaemin had the shock of his life. On top of that, he booked a night at a five-star hotel, too, just to amp it up a bit given the delay of the gift.

The gesture is admirable, really. So Renjun smiles, sweet and understanding. Jaemin runs a thumb over his knuckles and kisses them weakly. “It’s okay,” he says, even though they both know Renjun is excited for this—has been for the past nine months. “I can wait a couple more months.”

“No,” Jaemin repeats with more conviction this time. “No, we’re going. I already asked Jisung to babysit Luna for the evening, too.”

Renjun caresses Jaemin’s cheek with the back of his hand, thumbing over the tired skin just enough to get Jaemin to smile at him. 

“Chenle will be here by then,” he says. “He can babysit.”

Jaemin’s smile falters. “Chenle?” 

Renjun nods his head. “He already has a pet, wouldn’t it make sense?”

“Chenle has a pet dog,” Jaemin tells Renjun. “Luna is not a dog.”

“I don’t think that makes much of a difference, babe.” 

“No, it really does,” Jaemin starts. Renjun sighs wistfully and proceeds to swipe his hand across Jaemin’s cheek to press a palm against his mouth. He doesn’t even flinch when Jaemin licks it in retaliation, eyes glinting at Renjun. He’s definitely feeling better, then.

“They can both look after Luna,” Renjun says. He wipes his hand over Jaemin’s pyjama shirt. “I’m sure they’ll get along.”

Chenle arrives an hour later with a suitcase too big for a week’s stay and sunglasses that serve no purpose indoors—or in winter. 

“The winter sun is very harsh on the eyes,” he says to Renjun, chin hooked over his shoulder as he hugs him briefly. Renjun sighs and rolls his eyes, but they both know it’s out of love. “Where’s Jaemin?”

Renjun almost rolls his eyes again. Chenle adores Jaemin. It would be endearing if his cousin hadn’t admitted to having a crush on Jaemin way back when Renjun first introduced him to his family. There’s nothing to it now. Now, unfortunately, Chenle just uses it to piss Renjun off. Jaemin indulges, because he likes to piss Renjun off, too, but never for too long. He can’t go more than ten minutes without making it known how much he loves Renjun and they both like to exploit that fact about Jaemin. Jeno once told Renjun that he thinks every third thought Jaemin has, is most likely to do with Renjun—and that was back in university. But the point still stands today. 

“Getting ready,” Renjun answers for him. He takes Chenle’s suitcase and rolls it through the hallway. “Thanks for agreeing to watch Luna. Sorry we’re not home for your first night here.”

Chenle waves it off, finally removing his sunglasses to smile at Renjun. “Nothing to thank me for. I’ve been wanting to meet her since Jaemin spammed me with photos three months ago.”

“Right.”

Renjun can hear Luna now, her short meowing by their bedroom door as Jaemin converses with her quietly. At the sound of Renjun’s voice, she comes pattering into the living room, eager for interaction since Jaemin doesn’t let her into the bedroom—too tidy to fathom cat fur in bed. Luna tangles her tail around Renjun’s leg, steps on his feet with her paws, just to peer up at Chenle in interest. Chenle grins, his own eyes crinkling into something whisker-like. Luna hesitates for all of two seconds before she decides to approach. 

“She’s usually good with people,” Renjun says, crouching to pet her enough that she vibrates with the depths of her purr. “Jaemin’s work friend is also coming to look after her but he’s not staying the night. So if you get tired from the flight and need to rest, then you can. He’ll be here in the next hour. Luna is familiar with him, too, so.”

Chenle welcomes Luna with open arms, patting over her back and finally scooping her up in her arms so he can stand up again. Renjun does too, just as Jaemin finally emerges from their bedroom. He’s fiddling with the cuff of his shirt sleeve beneath his blazer, hair gelled back nicely enough that Renjun has an undisturbed view of Jaemin’s sharp features. Jaemin is so ridiculously handsome that Renjun doesn’t even stop himself from swooning. He’s wearing the suit Renjun got Jaemin for christmas, something designer and tailored and nothing at all like what Jaemin would pick out for himself. He looks attractive and charming and all the things that make deep yearning twist together in the pits of Renjun’s stomach. Which is so silly because Jaemin is his husband. There is nothing to yearn for. 

And then his cheeks dust pink, just enough that Jaemin notices with a raised eyebrow but no verbal question. Renjun feels giddy like a teenager. Like the nineteen-year-old who just got asked out by the hot best friend of his roommate, like the twenty-two-year-old who took Jaemin home to China for the holidays and they spent the week in sharing a bed in Renjun’s childhood bedroom. Like the twenty-five year old he is, married to Jaemin and blessed to see him in all ways. To see Jaemin first thing in the morning, when his voice is gravelly and it rumbles deep in his chest as he kisses Renjun before he fully wakes up. To see Jaemin last thing at night, eyes barely open and mind detached, but he still whispers the words I love you before Renjun finally succumbs to sleep. 

Renjun is so very lucky, he thinks to himself as he adjusts the crooked tie on Jaemin’s chest, pecking him once on the lips before he scurries off to get ready too.

If Renjun had swooned and felt dizzy with how handsome Jaemin looks, then Jaemin is far, far worse than him. He doesn’t drink, not really, but Jaemin asks for the restaurant’s finest red wine and almost drains the glass before they get to order their mains. Renjun reaches for Jaemin’s hand across the table, threads their fingers together and smiles warmly. His own cheeks are burning with the ache of his smile, but he cannot bring himself to stop even for a second. The restaurant is beautiful. Exactly the type of thing Renjun loves. Dripping in gold decor and fancy chairs and dark lighting. It doesn’t take a fool to notice how darkly Jaemin stares at Renjun, he had been doing so since Renjun stepped out of their bedroom, ready to leave. 

So much that even Chenle and Jisung got freaked out by it. 

So much that Renjun felt absolutely ashamed to be sitting in the passenger seat of Jaemin’s car, still on their way to the restaurant with Jaemin’s hand all over his thigh. Stopping at a red light and nosing his way into Renjun’s neck like he needs to breathe in his perfume to survive. Whispering hot words into the skin on the back of his hand like you’re so beautiful, Injunnie, so pretty, so dolled up, I’m so lucky to have you. And it’s no secret Renjun likes to dress up—even less of a secret that he likes to torture Jaemin when he does so.

Renjun just about held back on kissing Jaemin silly. There is no way he was showing up to the restaurant after making out with Jaemin. Not with how much he dressed up for this. Jaemin was going to have to wait at least a little bit longer.

“Why are your hands shaking?” Renjun asks, voice low and velvety. It’s the kind of twitchy Jaemin gets when they’re on holiday and he wants to take a picture of the sights. Renjun bats his eyelashes at Jaemin, just to watch him squirm. It might be nine months late, but this is Renjun’s birthday present right? He should be allowed to enjoy this. 

Jaemin’s grip on his hand tightens ever so slightly. He smiles. “Baby.” He sounds almost as if he’s begging. Hungry even though he ate his mains and picked at Renjun’s plate too. Renjun bites back a satisfied grin. “Please don’t do this to me.”

“What am I doing?” He asks, pouting with faux naivety. Jaemin looks ready to burst. “Jaemin-ah, we haven’t even got the dessert menu yet.”

“So?” Jaemin asks, fingers fiddling with Renjun’s own out of habit. “I can think of something better than dessert, really.”

“Don’t be silly,” he taunts. Jaemin almost chokes on his despair.

“I’m not too above public sex, Injun-ah, seriously. I’ll be your dessert.”

Renjun’s cheeks flame up. He squeezes Jaemin’s hand, more of a warning than it is anything else. “Don’t say that so loudly,” he whines. “And that doesn’t even make sense,” he adds on with a quiet voice, but his smile gives him away. “Why are you acting like you can’t have me?” He asks Jaemin then, tilting his head endearingly. “I’m already yours.”

The tension in Jaemin’s shoulders seeps out instantly. His face melts into something relieved. It would be endearing if Renjun wasn’t so amused. Jaemin doesn’t usually get like this. He’s possessive in his own right. He holds Renjun close even when they’re just grocery shopping. And he has a jealous streak because who doesn’t? But this—this is something beyond both those realms. Something Renjun can’t quite put his finger on. Something enchanting and lovable in its own way. Jaemin is restless, keen on Renjun, as if he’ll lose him if he doesn’t win his interest in the next second. As if he’ll die if Renjun so much as looks elsewhere. 

“Baby. Angel.” Jaemin pleads silently, eyes turning into liquid gold, pretend misery bleeding through his gaze. “Please kiss me.”

Renjun laughs, loud and melodic. Jaemin’s gaze switches into something longing and desperate. Renjun shakes his head, cheeks still ablaze with mild bashfulness. He doesn’t kiss Jaemin, not how he wants it, but Renjun lets his lips linger on the skin of Jaemin’s knuckles for a moment.

“You know PDA makes me embarrassed,” he tells Jaemin, softly chiding. Renjun picks up his fork and starts to pick at his food for no reason other than to look passive. Just to rile Jaemin up.

“I’ll tell everyone to close their eyes,” Jaemin says, deadly serious despite the ridiculous statement. “Renjun.” 

“Jaemin.” He takes a bite of his food, not missing the way Jaemin’s eyes zero in on the way his mouth closes around the fork. Renjun waits before speaking again. “Do you think Jisung and Chenle are having a good time with Luna?”

“I’m really not thinking about Chenle or Jisung right now,” Jaemin answers darkly. Renjun’s spine prickles with anticipation. 

“Hm.” Renjun blinks at Jaemin. “What are you thinking about?”

“You.” Jaemin curls his fingers around Renjun’s own, slotting them together with fascination. “And the fact that we’re sharing a hotel room tonight. And that you should be a lot kinder to me if you want me to be nice to you later.”

“We share a bedroom every night. It’s not much different,” Renjun muses, taking a sip of Jaemin’s wine. He was never going to finish it, anyways. He never does. Jaemin’s stare is unrelenting. Renjun almost finds himself squirming, but he’s much too affronted to follow through. “Jaem. That’s not fair.”

“What’s not fair, baby?” Jaemin asks, eyes suddenly bright and gleaming. Renjun pouts at him. 

“Don’t look at me like that,” he whines cutely. “I seriously want dessert.”

“Okay, okay. Sorry.” Jaemin placates. He sits back in the chair, and flags a waiter over to ask for the dessert menu. 

Jaemin is kind enough to actually wait for Renjun to finish his dessert, but that’s as far as he gets before Jaemin is sweeping him out of the restaurant after swiping his card. The hotel is right next door, equally as luxurious. Jaemin rushes past check-in, having already done so to drop off their overnight bag before they went to the restaurant. Renjun doesn’t get much of a chance to take in the room or the sight further than he had earlier, even though Jaemin booked a room on the top floor. Jaemin is too focused on reducing him to nothing but a whimpery, shaky set of limbs. Renjun gets a grip on the lapels of Jaemin’s blazer as he nibbles his way down the exposed skin of Renjun’s throat. 

“Jaem.” Renjun pats on his shoulder just enough for him to look up. His gaze is dark and determined. Renjun almost crumples where he stands, pressed against the hotel door. “Baby. You’re still ill.”

Jaemin grins, all teeth and all predatory. Renjun swallows back a moan. “Just a blocked nose,” he reminds Renjun. And it’s really, really unsexy, but it does nothing to deter Renjun’s from stiffening in his nicest dress trousers. 

“That sounds dangerous,” Renjun tries, but he’s already making room for Jaemin to slot a thigh between his legs, tense enough for him to grind downwards. He breathes out a moan despite himself. Jaemin holds his cheek tenderly, one thumb pressing into the plush of Renjun’s bottom lip, watches with rapt attention.

“Danger is hot,” Jaemin says, teasingly. Renjun rolls his eyes, losing his bite when Jaemin pushes his thigh further, spurring him on. “It’s okay, baby,” he promises. “As long as you feel good, hm? I’ll be soft on you,” Jaemin whispers hotly down his neck, hands now gripping the sides of Renjun’s hips, holding him in place and encouraging his movements. Renjun winds his arms around Jaemin’s neck and cranes upwards for a kiss. “Aw,” Jaemin coos. “My baby. So needy. Even after being a tease all night long, I’m being so good to you.”

Renjun nods his head helplessly. “I love you,” he mutters in between kisses, cheeks flushed with exertion already. 

Jaemin chuckles, hands sliding down Renjun’s body until he’s lifting him easily. He definitely isn’t young enough to be lifting Renjun anymore, but his legs wrap around Jaemin’s waist regardless. 

“And I love you,” he whispers against Renjun’s mouth, sitting down on the bed and holding Renjun in his lap. “So much. Happy late birthday, angel.” Jaemin lets Renjun slide off his lap, settling onto his knees on the floor as Jaemin leans back to take in the view. 

Renjun wakes up to the bright sun streaming through the window. He groans and rolls over, sore and heavy-limbed from the night before. Jaemin can sleep through an apocalypse, so he barely stirs when Renjun collides into his chest. He only makes a noise, something so quiet Renjun might have missed it, but then he settles with recognition. Jaemin’s arm curls over Renjun’s waist and pulls him in securely before he buries his face in Renjun’s hair. It’s still, peaceful, Renjun presses his palm to Jaemin’s bare chest and closes his eyes. He waits, just enough to feel the thumping of Jaemin’s heart under his skin and then Renjun leans close enough to leave a kiss to the skin over Jaemin’s heart. 

He’s barely awake, not functioning enough to even remember his own name, it’s more of a brush of lips than a kiss, but Jaemin holds him tighter all the same. Renjun settles in his arms and drifts back to sleep, caught up in the stillness of the early morning. 

When he wakes up again, Jaemin is already up, pressing chaste pecks to Renjun’s face wherever he can reach. Renjun begins to register his senses right around the time Jaemin kisses just beneath his eye, lips brushing against his eyelashes. He blinks his eyes open, face still too scrunched up to be considered awake. Jaemin grins down at Renjun, and his own heart stutters in his chest before it beats erratically—like it’s trying to escape from the confines of Renjun’s ribcage and into Jaemin’s hands. Renjun wonders if Jaemin can feel it, their bare skin pressed together leaves nothing protected. 

Not that he wants to be protected from anything in regards to Jaemin. Renjun trusts Jaemin so blindly that he thinks he’d let the world end before he has to do something without Jaemin by his side. 

“Hey, beautiful,” Jaemin says in that grainy morning voice. Fondness flushes through Renjun at the sound of his. He grunts, still too early in his consciousness to form words. Jaemin only smiles at him, pressing a thumb at the frown between Renjun’s eyebrows until his face settles into something neutral. 

“You forgot to close the curtains last night,” Renjun grumbles, already burrowing himself further into Jaemin’s arms. 

“Ah.” Jaemin is warm, warm, warm, and Renjun never wants to leave. “I was a little busy last night.”

“Tell me about it,” Renjun agrees. “You’re lucky if I can walk out of here.”

“I’ll carry you.”

“Your back can’t take that.”

“You’re not even that heavy,” Jaemin huffs, already nosing into Renjun’s puffy cheek. He kisses it once. “Seriously. You’ve been working too hard lately, baby.”

“Says you.” Renjun kisses Jaemin’s cute nose. “You’re the one who got sick from working too late.”

Jaemin turns sheepish, then he grins at Renjun all boyishly. “My nose isn’t even blocked anymore.”

Renjun sighs loudly, flopping over onto his back and stretching like a cat. He turns his head to Jaemin and blinks owlishly. 

“You want to go for breakfast?” He asks.

Jaemin nods his head, leaning forward to slide his lips over Renjun’s. It’s a soft kiss, the two of them still weighed down by sleepiness and the early morning. Jaemin is gentle and doting, hands curling over the sides of Renjun’s cheeks as he holds him still just to mould their lips together. Renjun preens, curving upwards and into Jaemin’s embrace naturally.

“We should get home soon, though,” Jaemin says, words murmured against Renjun’s lips. His eyes are still closed and his nose nuzzles into Renjun’s own. “Luna won’t like waking up without us there.”

“Hm.” Renjun nuzzles back, sighing breathily and feeling like liquid gold in Jaemin’s hands. “She’s probably already awake.”

As expected, Luna is hot on their toes when the apartment door opens.

Jaemin crouches immediately, arms wide as he scoops her up and holds her close. Renjun pats her head, coos when she shoves the flat of her nose into his palm and meows happily at their attention. He smiles, too in love with Jaemin and too adoring of Luna to care about the way they haven’t even made it a full foot into the apartment yet. Renjun scratches at the back of her neck, eyes catching the giant photo frame from their wedding day. Silently, Renjun feels something slot into place inside his heart, something like his promise to Jaemin back when they got married, like Jaemin’s promise to him when he proposed. Something wonderful and special and warm.

“Oh, hey,” Chenle says, stumbling on his feet. Renjun looks at him and smiles. “How was your date?”

“It was nice,” Renjun says gently. Jaemin softens beside him and it’s all just so warm. Renjun pats Luna’s fur and pulls away to walk into his home. “Being home is nicer, though. How was she?”

“She was fine. We just woke up so she’s good for food.” Chenle pauses and turns to Renjun. “Have you had breakfast?”

Renjun hums, but follows his cousin into the kitchen anyways. Jaemin passes them by with a kiss to Renjun’s head, heads straight for his office, probably to check any emails. Chenle busies himself with making breakfast, cracking eggs into a pan. It’s quiet for a moment, just enough for Renjun to settle comfortably with the wholesomeness in his chest, taking up the space of his heart. Just enough that he almost misses it when Chenle sits down and opens his mouth, not to eat but to pester Renjun first thing in the morning. 

“So.” Chenle looks right at Renjun and smiles conspiratorially. “Tell me,” he says, voice tinted with the same tone he uses in business meetings. “Do you know if Park Jisung is single?”

⚞ • ⚟

Renjun stretches across the bed, not quite awake yet to register the emptiness that he finds beside him. He takes up the entire space, limbs wide before he releases the tension with a sigh. It’s so quiet in the mornings, Renjun laments. He rolls over, too eager to open his phone and find the messages he knows are already waiting for him. 

He grins into the pillow, melting into the mattress at the selfie Jaemin had sent him. 

Jaem

[attachment]

good morning angel 

don’t forget to take your lunch to work today

Ji said he’ll stop by to check on Luna 

Renjun buries his face into the pillow Jaemin normally uses. The almost faded scent of his cologne only exists if Renjun inhales long enough. And if he does, then that’s a secret he’ll take to the grave. It’s whatever. Jaemin sniffs Renjun like he’s human oxygen all the time. (It’s probably alarming that Jaemin’s weirdest traits are rubbing off on Renjun, but he’s too mopey to care about that right now.)

Jaemin left two days ago for a work trip in London. Renjun had moped and sulked and asked why Jisung couldn’t go instead. Jaemin had patted the top of Renjun’s head with one hand and stroked Luna with the other. 

(“Jisung’s still in his final year of uni, baby.”

Renjun had pouted magnificently. Almost enough that Jaemin was half tempted to cancel the trip entirely. 

“I’m pretty sure Jisung is bunking his classes anyway,” Renjun grumbled. “What difference would it make?”

“Aw. Baby.” Jaemin had kissed the frown on Renjun’s forehead and smiled at him. “I’ll be back before you know it.”)

Jaemin has been gone for two days and Renjun is miserable. Even Luna is miserable. She’s slow when she eats and she’s cosying up to Renjun way more than normal. Maybe she can sense the fact that Renjun’s other half is halfway across the world and it’s getting him down. That’s a thing cats can do right? Nine lives has got to count for a sixth sense, or something. Renjun stares at the Jaemin’s too long to be deemed normal. 

It’s a blurry thing. For a professional photographer-turned-businessman-in-photography, Jaemin is awful at taking selfies. His glasses are still on, his face only illuminated by his laptop which Renjun can see reflected in his glasses. He looks tired. He looks beautiful. Renjun sighs forlornly. Jaemin never adjusts to time zones well, so he’s probably dead asleep right now even though Renjun set his alarm an hour early trying to catch his late night. It’s fine. He can just stare at the photo instead. 

When Renjun resigns himself to finally starting his day, he finds Luna sleeping by the front door, and his heart breaks cleanly in half. He calls for her, the cat perks up at the familiar voice before she slowly prowls her way over to Renjun. He smiles, tries to look like he’s not also wishing Jaemin would walk in any moment now. God, you’d think this is the first time Jaemin’s gone on a business trip, or something. It’s really not. But Renjun can’t help himself. He misses Jaemin. 

“Hey, girl,” Renjun greets, small fingers through her fur until she’s purring happily. His smile turns lighter, more genuine, before he decides to get her food ready. “Let’s have some breakfast.” 

He scoops Luna in his arms for a moment, getting his fill of morning cuddles somewhere. Renjun even snaps a selfie of them to send to Jaemin for when he wakes up too. 

And Renjun’s day goes on like that. He works until lunchtime, during which he calls Donghyuck while eating his lunchbox in his office.

“I can totally come over tonight,” Donghyuck suggests when he can tell Renjun is a bit down. “Jeno won’t mind.”

“No,” he sighs. “It’s okay. Don’t worry about it.” 

There’s a second of silence before Donghyuck speaks again. “How’s Luna?” The question is a welcoming distraction, one that Renjun takes without hesitation. 

The work day ends and Mark is asking if Renjun will join them for drinks. He smiles apologetically and declines. 

“Luna needs to be fed,” he says. Which is a small lie because Jisung would have definitely left her enough food for dinner. Renjun just really wants to be at home right now, even if Jaemin isn’t there physically. He’s waiting for Renjun to get home so he can call. 

Mark understands, smiles and bids Renjun goodnight. It is, admittedly, out of character for Renjun to reject a request like this. He usually enjoys the opportunity to socialise with colleagues. He believes it's better for the company, really he does. But Renjun also believes in catching Jaemin on his own lunch break, something he needs to be at home in time for because of the time zones. He texts Jaemin to say he’s leaving work now, just to give him the heads up.

The phone is ringing before Renjun fully punches in the code to their apartment. Traffic was a bitch and he got home fifteen minutes later than he was expecting to. He picks up the call just as Luna meows loudly upon Renjun’s entry. 

“Is that Luna?” Jaemin asks. 

Renjun huffs and kicks off his shoes. He picks up the phone, looks right in the camera and pouts at Jaemin. 

“I’ve been waiting for your call all day and the first thing you ask is about her?”

Jaemin’s eyes soften, even over the pixelated screen and Renjun pouts even more. 

“Injun-ah,” he says sweetly. “You know I’m always waiting to see you, too.” 

Renjun bites his lips to stop himself from smiling like a lovesick idiot. Jaemin, on the other hand, beams at his phone screen. 

“How’s it going?” Renjun asks, making his way into the apartment to where Luna waits by the couch. He sits on it with a huff, lets the cat climb over his lap and peer at the phone with interest. She seems to register Jaemin’s face, because she meows once more and tries to paw at the screen. “Luna-yah.” Renjun lifts it higher, just out of her reach but not enough to stop Jaemin from seeing her. 

“It’s going well, I think,” Jaemin says. He smiles at the screen and Renjun stares back. “All positive things so far.”

“Hm. That’s good,” Renjun mutters. 

“Are you sleepy, baby?” Jaemin asks. Renjun cracks an eye open and sits up, trying not to look so exhausted. “What time is it there? Have you eaten dinner?”

“It’s coming up to nine,” Renjun answers. “I ate before leaving work.” Jaemin blinks at him through the screen, expectant. Renjun’s cheeks flame up. He looks away shyly. “I’m not tired.”

“Injunnie.”

“I—it’s just hard to sleep without you here,” Renjun admits over a mutter. Jaemin hears it clearly enough, though, because he smiles in satisfaction. 

“Tell me about it,” Jaemin sighs. “I miss your pretty face.”

Renjun presses his cheek to the top of Luna’s head and looks into the camera. “I’m right here.”

Jaemin looks as miserable as Renjun feels, it’s almost laughable. “You’re a twelve-hour flight away.”

“You said it yourself,” Renjun says gently. “You’ll be back before you know it.”

Jaemin opens his mouth to respond, but is distracted by something off camera. Renjun hides his pout in Luna’s fur, already knowing that Jaemin is going to hang up now. So he pouts until Jaemin’s eyes flick back to his screen, smiling softly. 

“I gotta go now, angel,” Jaemin tells him. “Have a good night. I love you.”

“I love you,” Renjun says back, only strong enough to send a small smile Jaemin’s way. It’ll be his third night alone in bed, and it’s already taking a toll on Renjun’s mood. He sighs tiredly. “Come on.” He pats Luna encouragingly. “Bedtime.” 

This is the first time it has ever happened. Renjun stands to head into his room, a little surprised to find Luna following him. She stays close behind, meowing a little louder than usual, paws stretching upwards to cling onto Renjun’s trousers. He pauses, looks down at her and regrets doing so. Renjun is no stranger to the wet kitten look. He uses it all the time on Jaemin, so much that he knows exactly how long to not blink for so his eyes water that right amount to make Jaemin give in. What Renjun is a stranger to, however, is having that look projected onto him. By an actual kitten. 

Luna meows once more, something longing and anguished that it breaks Renjun’s heart. He sighs softly. 

“What is it, baby?” The cat takes a tentative step towards the open bedroom door and lies flat against the floor. Renjun sniffles. “You know you can’t sleep in the room,” Renjun tries with a gentle voice. Luna only meows once more, as if to ask but why? 

There's only so much Renjun can take. He drags her bed from the living room to right outside his bedroom door and leaves the door open even as he heads towards the shower. Renjun returns as quick as possible, refreshed and exhausted, crouching to Luna’s level and petting her. 

“Compromise,” he tells her. “Chenle says it’s the most effective business strategy.” Luna purrs softly.

Renjun waits until she’s asleep before he crawls into bed, slipping onto Jaemin’s side and inhaling deeply. 

The second time it happens, Renjun is on the phone to Jaemin. She meows incessantly, not caring for the way even Jaemin’s voice tries to placate her over the phone. Renjun has to put his phone on the side, just so he can hold Luna gently and show her Jaemin’s face. Only then does she settle. Jaemin coos, calls her name and entertains her until she’s too sleepy to be bothered anymore. Renjun puts her in her bed, right outside the bedroom door, and takes his phone to the bedroom with him. Jaemin has a rest day, which means he gets to spend longer on the phone. 

“Angel,” he says with that warm voice. If he were here in person, Renjun would be able to feel the rumble of it beneath his ear. “You should sleep. It’s late.”

“Day off tomorrow,” Renjun tells Jaemin sleepily, words garbled into Jaemin’s pillow. “I can stay up.”

“You’re falling asleep, Injun-ah.” 

Renjun pouts, even half asleep. “Not sleeping yet.”

Jaemin smiles, fond. “Alright,” he relents. “If you say so.”

“Tell me about the city,” Renjun requests. 

Jaemin’s voice carries on until Renjun drifts off into sleep, despite however much he fights to stay awake. 

By the third time, Renjun is just as defeated as Luna. Jaemin has a busy day today. One where he can’t find the time to call Renjun like usual. Which sucks because Renjun is tired and had to stay back longer than he wanted at work. To the point he had to call Jisung and ask the poor boy if he could check on Luna and give her dinner. All he wanted was to hear Jaemin’s voice.

 The cat meows sadly. Renjun feels the same. And maybe that’s why he gives in. After his sad attempt at a relaxing shower, Renjun throws on Jaemin’s old hoodie and reaches for Luna where she lies in her bed. She’s not sleeping yet, clearly waiting for Renjun to pet her. He sighs, hesitates for all of three seconds before he finally puts Luna on his side of the bed. 

“Alright,” Renjun mumbles, one stern finger pointed in her direction. She looks at it, probably debating on whether she should bite it or not. Renjun clears his throat to get her attention. “No moving around too much. Stay on the sheets where it’s easy to wash your fur off and Jaemin never has to know.” She makes a low noise. Renjun drops his shoulders. “Deal?”

Luna curls up on Renjun’s pillow which has admittedly been abandoned for the better half of the week. He’s found that sleeping on Jaemin’s pillow is the next best thing when Jaemin isn’t actually home. Renjun slides in beside her, one hand stretched out into her fur as he pets her softly. Luna preens and Renjun feels more relaxed. 

“Jaeminie will be back soon,” he tells Luna with a gentle sigh. “Two more days. But I’ll let you sleep in here until then.” Luna doesn’t really understand what Renjun is saying, but it’s good enough for him. Brings him comfort all the same. “He’s working really hard,” he tells her for no real reason. “Then, when it all works out, he’ll buy you that stupidly big cat tree he’s been eyeing up lately. Gonna take up the whole living room.” Luna’s eyes squint to a close, and Renjun watches her with a smile. “He loves you a lot, Luna-yah. So do I. But Jaemin has a lot of love to give, you know? So much of it, that sometimes I don’t know if I’m deserving of it all.”

Luna meows then, as if she disagrees. She pushes against Renjun’s hand and melts into the mattress, squinting at him. Renjun hums in acknowledgment. 

“I think we’re doing great, though,” Renjun tells Luna. “Even if he drives me crazy sometimes and thinks hotpot is too harsh on the stomach when he knows it’s my favourite, I wouldn’t want to go through life without him.” Luna makes a noise, something in agreement or maybe something longing. Renjun gets it. He closes his eyes, tired. “I miss him, too,” he reassures the cat. Jaemin is both of their favourite person, after all. Of course Renjun knows why Luna is so grumpy these days. 

Luna is already waiting on the bed for Renjun when he freshens up the next day. He feels half-minded to scold her lightly, but they both know Renjun’s too soft-hearted to really do that. So he sighs gently and strokes her head before sliding into bed himself. Jaemin’s flight doesn’t leave until the evening, when Renjun should be fast asleep, but he decides to stay up. Renjun waits for his texts and updates, not really replying because Jaemin thinks he’s asleep. When Jaemin finally texts that he is through security and waiting around, Renjun calls him. He sits up in bed, surprised that Jaemin picks up before the first ring gets to finish. 

“Injun-ah?” Jaemin asks. “Are you okay? Isn’t it, like, two in the morning?”

“Mhm.” Renjun pats Luna distractedly, suddenly wide awake. “It is. I just wanted to hear your voice.”

There’s a moment of silence on the phone. “Renjun-ah.” Jaemin’s voice is warm, so warm that Renjun thinks spring has come early in the middle of the night. He smiles at the sound. Even if Jaemin cannot see him, he knows it. “Hang on.”

Renjun opens his mouth to respond, left speechless when the call cuts suddenly. He pulls the phone away, blinking at his bright screen in the dark room until he is met with Jaemin’s incoming videocall. Renjun tries not to smile like a fool as he answers it. He fails miserably. 

Jaemin’s background is bright. The fluorescent airport lights are bright enough that it illuminates Renjun’s face from how he holds it in his hand. Jaemin smiles at him, eyes tired but still glistening with fondness. Renjun smiles.

“Hi,” he says, voice shy for no real reason. 

Jaemin grins at the screen. “Hey, angel.”

Renjun blushes. “How long until you board?”

“Like… maybe an hour?” Jaemin answers. 

“Okay,” Renjun says softly. He settles in the bed a little more comfortably and ignores Jaemin’s frown. “That’s not too bad.”

“Renjun,” he says then. “You don’t have to stay up for an hour.”

Renjun pouts at Jaemin, wide-eyed and all. “I want to. I miss you.”

Jaemin visibly softens, but his frown is still there. “I miss you, too,” he relents. Renjun lies on his pillow, blinking slowly at the screen as Jaemin starts talking about his last meeting. He is paying attention, just enough, just until Jaemin’s voice gets louder than before. Loud enough to grab Luna’s attention. Renjun pauses, shifts in bed so her movement doesn’t get picked up. But then she meows, something quiet and cute, as if she’s calling out for Jaemin. He stops suddenly and looks at the screen. “Injunnie?”

“Hm?” Renjun rolls around and looks at Luna over the top of his phone. She doesn’t care, even though she made a deal with Renjun. “Yeah?”

Jaemin raises an eyebrow. “Is that Luna? Is—is she in bed with you?”

At the sound of her name, the cat perks up. Renjun watches her in disbelief as she prowls over, burrowing her way in between Renjun’s arms and slowly inching into the camera frame. He watches the shift in Jaemin’s face, going from confused to bewildered to genuinely awed. Renjun smiles sheepishly. 

“She was missing you too much,” Renjun tries. “She wouldn’t sleep otherwise.” Jaemin is quiet for a moment. He just stares at Renjun and Luna through the screen and only blinks. Renjun bites his lip hesitantly. “Jaem? Don’t be mad, I’ll change the sheets before you get back. She—”

“Hang on,” Jaemin says, now frowning in concentration. “I’m trying to take a screenshot.” 

Renjun’s mouth snaps shut. He blinks at Jaemin with wide eyes, silent for a second before he feels his face split into a wide grin. Renjun’s chest burns with love and he feels the ache in the apples of his cheeks. Jaemin smiles back, seemingly satisfied with his screenshot. He calls for Luna, cooing at her over the phone before she eventually gets bored of phone-Jaemin. Not as good as the real thing, Renjun laments with a sigh. 

“Get some sleep, băobèi,” Jaemin says with a gentle voice. Renjun makes a non-committed hum that makes Jaemin huff. “I’ll be back before you know it.”

Jaemin returns home the next evening, tired eyes and slumped shoulders. At the sound of their front door opening, Renjun practically runs to the hallway, Luna secured in his arms. He stops, stares at their wedding photo with an unbridled giddiness, waiting for Jaemin to finally lift his head once he takes his shoes off. When he does, Renjun lets Luna go from his arms. At the sight of Renjun’s warm smile, Jaemin’s tired eyes naturally shift into the long-built fondness he holds for Renjun, warm and golden brown no matter what. Jaemin smiles back, arms outstretched for Renjun to walk into. And he does, ignoring the fact that Jaemin has just had a twelve hour flight and probably wants nothing more than to shower and rest. 

Renjun presses the side of his face onto Jaemin’s chest, right over his heart and sighs happily. 

“Hi, angel,” Jaemin says, warm and soft and gentle. Renjun melts further into his arms. 

“Hi,” he mumbles back. “How was the flight?”

“Fine,” Jaemin answers, securing his arms around Renjun as Luna tries to climb up their legs. “It’s good to be back, though.”

“Hm.” Renjun lifts his head and kisses Jaemin once on the lips. “It’s good to have you back,” he mutters. “We missed you.” 

Jaemin smiles, taking Renjun’s face in between his two palms and knocking their noses together gently. Renjun scrunches his reflexively but doesn’t pull away. The sparkle in Jaemin’s eyes as he looks at Renjun almost resembles the one from the day of the photo on the wall. Renjun would know because he sees the photo everyday, so much that it would be impossible to forget the way Jaemin looked at him even if he tried. Jaemin’s smile is just as soft, his eyes just as gentle, hands just as warm, as they were in the photo.

Renjun knows that it’ll only get softer, gentler, warmer. Jaemin tilts his head, silently questioning Renjun. 

“What’s on your mind?” Jaemin asks quietly. 

Renjun blinks at him. “Nothing,” he answers. “Just. Thinking about our wedding day.”

It makes Jaemin raise an eyebrow, clearly interested. “What about it?”

“I thought that was the day I’d feel how much I love you the most,” Renjun tells him, cheeks warm and heart full. “Like if there’s one day where I feel it all, you know, it would be that day.” 

“Was it?” Jaemin asks. He’s smiling at Renjun now, too tender and so fond, tucking a strand of hair behind Renjun’s ear out of habit. 

Renjun shakes his head shyly. “Not really,” he replies. Jaemin makes a questioning hum, and Renjun pulls him closer. “I’ve felt it everyday since then,” he tells Jaemin honestly. “When I wake up in the morning, when I go to work, when I see you—when I don’t see you. When I miss you. Before I sleep at night. I just…” Renjun bites his lip and stares up at Jaemin with wide eyes. “I love you so much.”

Jaemin preens, and practically smushes Renjun’s cheeks together with his glee. “I love you so much,” he tells Renjun, kissing the manufactured pout that resulted from the way he’s squishing Renjun’s cheeks. Jaemin holds him close, pecks his pout once more before his peppers kisses everywhere else on Renjun’s flushed face. 

He squirms in Jaemin’s hold, giggling and blushing like a teenager. Jaemin kisses his forehead with a loud smacking sound. Renjun fakes a grimace, losing its impact when he smiles immediately after. There’s an impatient meow that comes from their feet. Jaemin looks down at Luna, crouches to hold her in one arm before he stands up again. He holds Renjun tight as he talks to her in that baby voice specifically saved for her.

“Great,” Renjun sighs dramatically. He drops his head into Jaemin’s shoulder and looks at Luna happily. “Now I have to go back to competing with our cat for your attention.”

“Aw, baby,” Jaemin coos, voice pitched up exaggeratedly. “You like me that much?” 

Renjun rolls his eyes. “I’m married to you. Of course I like you that much.”

“Aw.” Jaemin looks at Renjun with mirth. “Babe. I was actually talking to Luna.”

Renjun pushes at Jaemin’s sturdy chest and huffs. “Whatever.” He tries to break free from Jaemin’s one-arm embrace, not fully resisting when he pulls Renjun back in softly. “Let me go.”

“Nope. Never.” Jaemin holds Renjun close with one arm and balances Luna in the other. He grins at Renjun with those glittery eyes. “It’s nice to be home.”