Archive of Our Own

Sometimes Oikawa doesn't know when to shut up. Well, fairly frequently, probably, if he's being honest with himself. He has this irrepressible need to try to say the right thing, to come across the right way. The more uncomfortable he is, the worse it gets, because he will not give up until he's certain he's convinced everyone around him that he's better than okay, that he knows what he's talking about. Since he is generally full of shit, this leads to a lot of words coming out of his mouth.

He also has a thing with wanting to have the last word.

He also just thinks he's pretty damn clever sometimes. (Because he is.)

So all in all, he tends to say more than he probably should. Sometimes he really just needs (wants) someone to stop him. And sometimes, someone does.

Not really someone, though. It's Iwaizumi. It's always Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi has probably told Oikawa to shut up at least 10,000 times in all the years that they've been friends. But the first time he makes him is the day of their high school graduation.

No, no that's not technically true. The very first time was when they were twelve years old. A round-cheeked girl in their class had just shyly offered Iwaizumi a box of homemade truffles, mumbling a breathy confession that neither of them could quite catch before scampering off and disappearing into a group of giggling female classmates. Iwaizumi was left so incredibly flustered and red-faced from the whole ordeal that Oikawa, largely out of jealously, teased him relentlessly, going so far as to mimic the poor girl's confession (not his proudest moment, even he knows he deserved what came next), until Iwaizumi shoved a giant, raspberry-filled truffle right in Oikawa's mouth, smacked him over the head for good measure, and stomped off.

There was a happy ending to this event, at least. After Oikawa had stopped choking on chocolate and cleaned his face, he apologized sincerely to Iwaizumi, who then apologized for hitting him (but not for the truffle, understandably), and once that was settled they both swore never to complicate their lives by accepting a girl’s confession. It was a promise that was never very difficult not to break, though Oikawa tested the limits as he got older and discovered just how fun innocent flirting could be. (“Shittykawa, don't do it if you don't mean it.”)

So, immediately after their high school graduation ceremony is the second time, officially, that Iwaizumi is driven to make Oikawa shut his mouth.

Oikawa is freaking out. He and Iwaizumi are not going to the same college. He still doesn't understand how he even let this happen. It's not what he wants, and he's so afraid that this will be the beginning of the end. Just because they've always been best friends, doesn't mean they always will be. And now, now…how is he ever going to tell Iwaizumi that he doesn't want to just be best friends?

He's tried to tell him, in little ways. But he's getting really worried at this point that Iwaizumi either is just not interested in him, or he's too thick to see that Oikawa touches him way more than he needs to because he wants to touch him.

And now they're going to be in different places and it will get harder and harder, and Oikawa doesn't know what to do.

So he's talking. A lot. Saying really stupid things that he doesn't mean.

"What will you do, Iwa-chan," he says, swinging his legs over the edge of the wall behind the school that Iwaizumi is already sitting on, and dropping down beside him. Right beside him. "When you don't have me to give you a social life?"

"You're not my only friend, Oikawa," Iwaizumi says evenly.

"I'm not your only friend because you are friends with me. Take me away and…" Oikawa snaps his fingers. "It's just Iwa-chan, in a dark, empty room, glowering at no one at all."

Don't take me away, Oikawa thinks.

"You're such an asshole," Iwaizumi says. "Maybe without you around my self-esteem will skyrocket and I'll suddenly become magnetic."

You're already magentic. That's why I'm sitting embarrassingly close to you.

If Oikawa could just say what he's thinking everything would be so much easier.

"Hmm, that's a nice thought Iwa-chan," he says. "But maybe I should come visit you, make the rounds with you and help you make some connections, so you're not lonely."

"You definitely don't need to do that."

"You won't be lonely?"

You don't want me to visit you? Oh my god, do you not want me to visit you?

"It might be nice," Iwaizumi says, "to not have someone always, always talking in my ear."

"Oh."

Oikawa should stop at that. Or he should say, But I will be lonely, Iwa-chan. I don't want to be away from you. But he doesn't know how to not be an asshole when he's this scared, so he keeps going.

"You might be unpleasantly surprised to find it much too quiet then," Oikawa says, reaching up to brush his fingers through Iwaizumi's spiky, black hair. It looks like it wouldn't be soft, but it is. It's so, so soft. "When it's just you and your empty head."

Oh my god. Shut up, Oikawa.

"Shut up, Oikawa," Iwaizumi says.

I would really like to, but I can't. I'm going to lose you, I'm going to lose you, I'm going to lose you.

"I can call you, if you want," he continues. "To remind you what intelligent thoughts sound like, and…"

Oikawa's torrent of stupidity is slowed when Iwaizumi turns to face him. His beautiful eyes narrowed, eyebrows drawing together. He looks like he might punch Oikawa, and Oikawa almost wishes he would.

"And…just…if you want to hear my voice, and—"

"Oikawa," Iwaizumi says. He has that warning tone in his voice.

"And if you ever do want me to visit you, because you will inevitably be terribly lonely—"

"Oikawa." Oh God, maybe it's best that Oikawa can't shut up. Maybe Iwaizumi will get so sick of him that he'll get up and walk away, and Oikawa won't have to wait for it to happen slowly.

"I'm sure I'll be extremely busy, because as you know I—"

"Oikawa! I swear to God!" Iwaizumi says. He looks furious and Oikawa feels his eyes starting to burn. Iwaizumi is going to kill him. He's going to walk away or he's going to kill him. Either way Oikawa is done.

"I—I don't share your social awkwardness, and—"

Iwaizumi reaches for him suddenly, with both hands. All the better to strangle him quickly. Oikawa doesn't move when those hands come to his face instead of his neck. He doesn't blink when they tighten there and pull him forward. He doesn't breathe when Iwaizumi leans in just as suddenly as he'd grabbed him and presses their mouths together.

Oikawa makes a little sound. A squeak almost, and just like that, Iwaizumi is pulling back, after only two seconds of their lips touching.

"Iwa-chan," Oikawa whispers. It only took two seconds for him to become breathless enough that whispering is all he can manage.

"I'm sorry," Iwaizumi says, his hands still on Oikawa's face. "You just really needed to stop talking."

Oikawa can feel his face fall. Those tears that have been pricking at his eyes are about to spill.

"Is that…is that why you…" If that is the only reason Iwaizumi kissed him…

"Yes," Iwaizumi says.

Oh God.

"Because I know you're full of shit, Oikawa. I know you're going to miss me, and you want to visit me and call me, but instead you spew all this arrogant bullshit because you're too stupid to just…"

"Just what?" Oikawa asks. He knows perfectly well what he's been too stupid to do, but if Iwaizumi knows too, if that is why he just kissed him…

Iwaizumi looks away, but he's still touching Oikawa, his hands firmly holding his shoulders now. "You're too stupid to know that you don't need to do that. You don't need to run your mouth like that, because I already know what you're trying to say. I think. I think I know."

"Why did you kiss me, Iwa-chan?" Oikawa asks, his voice still too soft. Much too honest.

"So you'd shut up, and know that you have nothing to worry about."

"Why?" Oikawa asks again.

Iwaizumi's eyes finally come back to his. Warm and steady and open. "Because I like you too, you dumbass."

Oikawa smiles, a pathetic wobbly attempt at upturned lips, because he's crying at the same time. "You do?"

Iwaizumi rolls his eyes, just like he always does, but he can't keep the growing smile off his face. "Why the hell else would I put up with you?"

Oikawa can't throw one of his typical pithy responses back at Iwaizumi. He's been temporarily stunned into saying exactly what he means to. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asks.

"Because you never shut up! And sometimes I don't know if you're just being an asshole, or if I'm right about what you're thinking. I think I'm usually right, but this was a big one to gamble on."

Oikawa is still crying, and he's not a pretty crier. He wishes that he was, but he knows his eyes are getting puffy now, his nose is a second or two away from dripping snot, and his chin is quivering in a very vulnerable way that would kill him for anyone but Iwaizumi to see. He wraps his arms around Iwaizumi's neck and says, "Please kiss me again."

Iwaizumi does. Tears and snot and quivering chin and all. He presses warm lips to Oikawa's, and then the tip of his tongue until Oikawa opens his mouth just enough for their lips to fit together. Oikawa keeps his arms tight around Iwaizumi and thanks every god and saint and lucky star that he doesn't have to say another word.

*

They spend the summer just like they've spent every one before it: playing volleyball, watching movies, hanging out with friends and going swimming. It's all entirely new though, because instead of just being together, they are together. They let their gazes linger every time they change out of sweaty gym clothes or clinging swim shorts. They kiss each other on Iwaizumi's living room couch when his parents aren't home, the unwatched movies they play providing the soundtrack to each make-out session. They let their mouths and hands wander to new places, pulling clothing open or off when it's just the two of them and they can do more than sneak glances.

Iwaizumi goes down on Oikawa for the first time the day Oikawa's welcome packet from the university turns up in the mail, letting him know what he needs to do and where he needs to go when he arrives. Oikawa starts to cry as he reads it because it's only a month away and then he will be doing all those things without Iwaizumi, and Iwaizumi still doesn't mind dealing with snot and tears, he just kisses Oikawa, soft and sweet until Oikawa isn't crying anymore. Then he kisses him harder, pressing him down on his back on his bedroom floor, telling him not to be stupid, it isn't worth crying about. It isn't going to change anything. And then he unzips Oikawa's pants, tugs his boxers down enough to free his cock, and coaxes him into full hardness with soft laps of his tongue before taking him in and showing him they have plenty of better things to focus on.

The next half of the summer is even better, after that. Oikawa is so happy that he doesn't have a very hard time not being an asshole. He tells Iwaizumi what he's thinking, or he shows him, and they spend their last few weeks learning everything they can about each other, all the things they weren't allowed to know when they were only friends. The taste of the skin in the crease at the top of Iwaizumi's thighs, the way Oikawa shivers when Iwaizumi draws a careful, wet line with his tongue from the base of Oikawa's neck all the way down to the small of his back.

By the end of the summer Oikawa is sleeping at Iwaizumi's most nights, they're doing more than sleeping with each other most days, and they learn what it feels like to share absolutely everything, to come together and have no need to say a single thing beyond each other's names.

They're closer than they've ever been when the time comes to head to their separate colleges (three hours apart by train, which at this point seems like too much distance to even be considered humane) and a new chapter begins.

Oikawa struggles with this chapter. He feels like the worst of himself when he's away from Iwaizumi. He wants this to work, it is going to work. But the thing is, Oikawa is a little bit needy. He likes attention, and affirmation, and contact. He wants Iwaizumi's arm around him, his deep voice sending little puffs of warm air over his skin when he speaks, so Oikawa has concrete evidence that he is wanted, that he is Iwaizumi's.

It's harder, when they only see each other every other weekend, and Iwaizumi sends such short text messages that sometimes they go entire days and Oikawa feels like they haven't connected at all.

He keeps being positive, though. It's easier at times like this, when they're on the cusp of one of their visits. Oikawa will be spending the weekend in Iwaizumi's dorm room with him and he truly is over the moon about it.

Oikawa
Two more days, iwa-chaaaan (((o(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)o)))

Iwa-chan
yep

Oikawa
Did you get my messages last night? i can't make plans for our weekend if you don't respond to any of my questions

Iwa-chan
it's just 2 days, we dont need to plan anything

Oikawa
It's two and a half, and we may not need to but that doesn't mean we can't! Don't you want to take me out and show me off?

Iwa-chan
i'm sure you'll manage to show off without my help

That is both insulting and not at all what Oikawa was driving at. It's really no wonder that by the time his train has arrived Friday evening and Iwaizumi is picking him up, Oikawa's nerves are coiled so tightly he's ready to snap.

It's no wonder at all that he's on the brink of needing someone to shut him up again.

He talks nonstop, from the moment Iwaizumi's lips have left his when they kiss quickly at the train station, to the moment they get to his dorm room and Oikawa sees Iwaizumi's roommate…at which point he is temporarily rendered speechless.

In the almost two months since they started college, Oikawa has been here two times before this, and both of those times the roommate had already left for the weekend, so this is Oikawa's first time seeing him. His shiny, black hair and his grey eyes, and how all-over annoyingly attractive he is.

"Oikawa-san! It's so good to finally meet you!" he says, reaching out a hand for Oikawa's as soon as he and Iwaizumi have stepped inside.

"Oh…you, too," Oikawa lies.

"I'm heading home for the weekend and I've got to take off, but I'm glad I caught you. Iwaizumi, I picked up your history paper for you. It's on your desk."

"Thanks, man," Iwaizumi says, looking over at one of the two, tiny grey desks in the room.

"Of course! Have a great weekend, you two!"

Oikawa makes a noise, more akin to an angry cat than a friendly person, but it's the best he can do. Iwaizumi says goodbye and then turns to Oikawa as soon as the door has closed and they're alone.

"You okay there?" he asks.

"Mhm!" Oikawa says, lips pressed together. He maybe should be okay, but every clipped text message he's received from Iwaizumi over the past couple weeks seems full of ominous meaning now, and he's not actually feeling very okay at all.

"Okay…" Iwaizumi says, tugging Oikawa's bag out of his hand and setting it at the end of his bed.

"Does he do that a lot?" Oikawa asks, and Iwaizumi turns back to face him.

"Do what?"

"Sweet little favors like that, picking things up for you."

Iwaizumi looks vaguely amused. "My history paper, Oikawa. We're in the class together and I missed it this morning because practice went long."

"Well, isn't he just a kind-hearted little samaritan."

"Oikawa…" Iwaizumi shakes his head. "Don't start."

Iwaizumi should know better. Oikawa clearly already has started, and once that happens there's really no stopping him. Or at least some serious intervening circumstances will be required for stopping to be a possibility.

"Don't start what? I'm just curious, Iwa-chan, since you tell me so little in your monosyllabic text messages…just how much does he do for you?"

"You're an idiot," Iwaizumi says. Shrugging out of his jacket and tossing it on the back of the chair at his desk.

"You say this," Oikawa says, "but we both know my observational and information processing skills are far superior to yours, and anyway, it wouldn't take a rocket scientist to—"

"Hey, Oikawa. How about you see if you can go five minutes without insulting me, and we can just enjoy our weekend, huh?" Iwaizumi says, his eyes getting that familiar glint that means Oikawa is possibly on dangerous ground.

"I'm just saying that—"

"Don't!" Iwaizumi steps closer to him. "You're being stupid and you know it, so just stop."

"Does he pick up lunch for you?" Oikawa asks, mentally slapping himself for not only not stopping, but making this even worse. "Does he put little notes in it and—"

"Oikawa, seriously."

"No, wait, does he rub your shoulders for you when you get back from practice, and act like it's all innocent when really—"

"Stop it. Not one more word."

"But—"

"No." Iwaizumi shakes his head for emphasis, and brings both his hands to Oikawa's shoulders. Not his throat. Oikawa has evaded death by strangulation once again, in spite of how obnoxious he knows he's being. But if Iwaizumi only knew how it felt to come in and see this stupidly pretty boy who is doing favors for his boyfriend, and…and…Oikawa is distracted suddenly from his thoughts by the amount of pressure Iwaizumi is putting on his shoulders. He's not just resting his hands there, he's actually pushing Oikawa downwards.

"Iwa-chan…"

"Get on your knees," Iwaizumi says.

Oikawa does it without thinking, letting Iwaizumi push him all the way until he's kneeling before him, looking up at him with wide eyes.

"Now do something with your mouth that doesn't make me want to wring your neck." Oikawa swallows, and Iwaizumi doesn't lose that look in his eyes that is making Oikawa's heart race, making his blood start to rush between his legs, but he uses one hand to touch Oikawa's chin gently. "Something only you do for me."

Oikawa feels his heart squeeze. He knows he's the only one who does this with Iwaizumi. He knows Iwaizumi is not a cheater, is nothing that would give Oikawa cause to act the way he's been acting, to imagine the things he's been imagining, but he almost cries hearing Iwaizumi say it, and he doesn't say another word.

So the third time Iwaizumi makes Oikawa shut up is when he undoes his own jeans and presses Oikawa's face between the open zipper, so Oikawa can feel him already growing hard against his lips, can breathe him in through the thin cotton of his boxer-briefs.

Oikawa needs to apologize, with actual words. He needs to tell Iwaizumi why he acted that way, how much he misses him and just wants to be close to him. But this is probably a good way to start. Oikawa has a way with words, even when he says too many of them, but that's not the only way he's good with his mouth.

He usually likes to take his time, teasing and brushing little kisses across the soft skin of Iwaizumi's thighs before he even starts to torment him with little flicks of his tongue against his cock. This though...this will be different. It's already different, with Iwaizumi holding him down, standing in the middle of his room instead of one of them lounging across a bed or couch.

Oikawa can work with this. He can be good this way, too. He tugs Iwaizumi's pants down his thighs so he can get his underwear out of the way, and then looks up as he wraps one hand around the base of Iwaizumi's cock and closes his mouth over his half-hard length. He likes it like this, likes the way he can move it around his mouth, sucking at it and feeling it grow and stiffen until it's heavy on his tongue and Iwaizumi's hands are clenching tight on his shoulders.

He pulls off then, and takes a minute to remind Iwaizumi of the other good things his mouth can do. The way he can curl his tongue around his shaft and drag it from base to tip, the way he can dip it into his slit to taste the precum pooling there, the way he can go down on him again with just the tiniest hint of teeth so Iwaizumi is gasping and rocking into him.

"Nnng…I hate when you do that," Iwaizumi growls.

"Ah can ‘ell," Oikawa says around a mouthful of cock.

"Stupid…I can't understand you."

"I can tell," Oikawa says, pulling off and looking up at Iwaizumi's flushed cheeks, his big, dark pupils. His cock is swollen and dripping, inches away from Oikawa's mouth "Doesn't get you off at all."

"Oikawa…"

Right. Shutting up. Or perhaps choosing just the right words.

"Fuck me," he says, and then he opens his mouth wide and looks up at Iwaizumi, waiting.

Iwaizumi swallows audibly and the red in his cheeks spreads down to color the skin above his t-shirt collar. Oikawa has always been in control when he's sucked Iwaizumi off, but he's pretty certain he'll be good at this, too. He's very certain that he wants to do it either way.

He closes his eyes when Iwaizumi's dick slides between his lips. He moans around it when strong fingers twist into his hair and steady his head as the tip bumps the back of his throat.

He almost gags. He swallows too many times all at once and Iwaizumi groans, and that sound is enough to help Oikawa focus, to make sure he can keep drawing that sound from his quiet boyfriend. He breathes rapidly through his nose, and then his throat settles and he hums a little, reaching behind Iwaizumi to cup his ass and pull him closer.

Iwaizumi needs very little encouragement. He starts to roll his hips, letting his cock drag back and forth in shallow thrusts over Oikawa's tongue. And then the thrusts deepen and Iwaizumi is pressing himself to the back of Oikawa's throat again, staying there and pushing deeper, and…yes, Oikawa can do this.

Iwaizumi gagged and coughed so much the one time he tried to deepthroat that Oikawa had ended up climbing on top of him and kissing the tears that were running down his cheeks, trying not to laugh as he promised the poor, gasping boy in his arms that he didn't need to go down Iwaizumi's throat to love being blown by him. (He suspects Iwaizumi is going to want to try again though, because Oikawa is killing it right now, and Iwaizumi doesn't like to give Oikawa opportunities to have any kind of upper hand.)

The sound it makes is, objectively, really gross, but subjectively…incredibly hot. Knowing that it's Iwaizumi's cock fucking into his mouth that is causing it, knowing that it's the reason Iwaizumi is grunting and panting above him now.

"God…God, Oikawa."

"Mmm." Oikawa can't speak, but he wants Iwaizumi to know how good this is for him too, how it's making his head spin and his cock ache against the tight fabric of his jeans. He flicks the snap open without thinking, getting his zipper down and his cock in his hand so he can stroke himself to the same hurried rhythm of Iwaizumi's thrusts. They're coming harder and faster now and he's really feeling it. His eyes are watering and he's drooling, spit and precum dripping from the sides of his mouth, which is only acceptable to him because it's for Iwaizumi. He's feeling light headed and his own cock is leaking, his hips are rocking forward into empty air, but he knows he can last because Iwaizumi is definitely close.

He's breathing harshly now and his hips are falling out of rhythm, thrusting shallowly a few times and then…oh, there. He jerks deep into Oikawa once more and then stays in place, making a strangled sound as he rolls his hips and pumps his hot, thick cum directly into Oikawa's throat.

Oikawa's eyes are streaming, he's swallowing convulsively and digging his fingers into Iwaizumi's ass, and he's mildly afraid that he might really choke before Iwaizumi is finished spilling into him, but then Iwaizumi is groaning one last time before tugging back on Oikawa's hair as he slips his cock out of his mouth.

"Shit," Iwaizumi says, looking down at Oikawa with heavy-lidded eyes, taking in the sight of him jerking himself with rapid, shallow strokes over the head of his cock, before rubbing his palm roughly over the tip and crying out as he comes into his hand. God, it feels good. Getting off with Iwaizumi's taste in his mouth and his hand still tangled in his hair, pulling his head back.

"Mm…Iwa-chan," Oikawa says when the tremors of his orgasm have faded to a gentle, buzzing feeling in his limbs. He wipes his hand on his jeans and catches his breath as he stares up at Iwaizumi, reveling in how flushed and satisfied he looks. He smiles and leans in again to let his tongue show off just a little bit more, licking the traces of cum and trails of his own saliva from Iwaizumi's shaft, before taking the sensitive head back in his mouth and sucking it gently.

"Ah…okay, okay," Iwaizumi says, shuddering as Oikawa licks him one last time and finally lets go of his cock. "You feel better now?"

Oikawa laughs, fluttery and a little breathless. "Yes," he says. "Do you?"

"I feel…amazing. But I was good before that, I just…" Iwaizumi pauses, tucking himself back into his pants and then sinking to his knees in front of Oikawa. He uses his thumb to wipe away a smear of cum from the side of Oikawa's mouth, then looks down at his exposed cock and flushes slightly before shaking his head and looking up again. "Listen, Oikawa…that? What just happened? He doesn't do that with me. He doesn't do anything for me that a normal roommate wouldn't, because he's not my boyfriend. You are."

Oikawa nods. He knows this. Sometimes his brain just won't think rationally enough to believe it.

"Can we talk like real people now?" Iwaizumi asks. "Just me and you?"

"Instead of you and psychoikawa?" Oikawa asks, smiling slightly.

"Yeah," Iwaizumi says, smiling a little, too. "Crazykawa."

Oikawa laughs softly and lets his head hang down. "I'm sorry," he says. "I just…I get so scared when I can't see you and I don't know what you're thinking, and…and you don't talk to me, Iwa-chan. You never really express any feelings other than irritation, so when I just get these short little text messages from you I start wondering—"

"Oikawa." Iwaizumi ducks his head down so Oikawa has to look at him. "I'm sorry. I never want to…I'm not trying to make you worry. I just hate texting."

"I know you do."

"But…I'll try, okay? I'll try harder. I want to talk to you."

"Okay," Oikawa says, trying to smile and sniffling quietly because he is possibly feeling like crying again. He blames the post-orgasm euphoria. It fucks with his emotions, brings them all too close to the surface. "I just…I really miss you."

"I know. I do, too."

"And sometimes I think you're forgetting about me, when you don't see me, and all these other people are right here and—"

"Hey, what do you take me for?" Iwaizumi cuts him off. "I'm not a dog that forgets something exists if it can't see it anymore."

"That's not a great example, Iwa-chan. Dogs are actually really—"

"Oikawa, stop. I know…I know I'm not great at talking about feelings and stuff, but…that doesn't mean I don't have them. You know that, right?"

"I do, I know, but—"

"I love you," Iwaizumi says, his warm, green eyes locked on Oikawa's. "Okay? I love you. You need to stop worrying."

"You love me," Oikawa repeats.

He knows Iwaizumi loves him, of course. In the way he always has, because they've been by each other's side since they were children. But he never says it, and Oikawa knows that the way he's saying it now is not an expression of that love they've always had. This is the love that Oikawa feels running through him so hot he's afraid he's going to boil over sometimes, sending steam shooting from his ears like a cartoon character, while his eyes are replaced with giant, beating hearts.

"Yes," Iwaizumi says. So simply and assuredly.

Oikawa smiles. Then he smiles wider, grinning stupidly. He launches himself at Iwaizumi, knocking him to his back and falling heavily on top of him, pressing laughing kisses all over his face before settling in to kiss him slowly. Really barely even moving, just pressing their open mouths together and inhaling deeply. Filling himself with the sweet breath of the boy beneath him. The breath that carried those three words to his ears.

"Hey," Iwaizumi says, when Oikawa withdraws, staying close and brushing the tip of his nose along the strong line of Iwaizumi's jaw. "Don't you have anything you want to say to me?"

Oikawa hums a little, considering this. Then he nods. "Fuck me, for real now," he says.

Iwaizumi blinks. "That's…yes. But that's not what I meant. I—"

"I love you," Oikawa says easily. He's been saying it out loud for years, it's not hard to say it this way, too. "I love you and I want you to fuck me now."

Iwaizumi bites his lip and doesn't say anything, but his golden skin flushes pink and Oikawa knows the words mean something to him, too. He nods after a moment, a little awkwardly because he's flat on his back. "I'll need a minute," he says.

"That's all? I don't mind a good quickie, Iwa-chan, but—"

"To be ready, dumbass. You just sucked me off."

"Ah," Oikawa says, as if he didn't already know exactly what Iwaizumi meant. He lies down on top of him, folding his arms across his chest and resting his chin on them. "I don't mind waiting."

It doesn't end up being much of a wait. It's only a matter of minutes before Iwaizumi is rolling them over, undressing Oikawa, and then murmuring all the things he doesn't say when they're texting each other, as he works him open with his fingers and then with his cock. You're so good…so good, Oikawa, as he thrusts deep and slow, and Oikawa is very glad they haven't made a single plan for the weekend.

He really only cares about showing off for Iwaizumi. This is all that he wants.

*

It's better, after that. Iwaizumi really does try. He texts Oikawa more often—little, mundane messages about his day that he's always thought were pointless to share, but Oikawa loves them because they make him feel connected to Iwaizumi. He texts back every time Oikawa texts him, no matter how many times that is, and though he still refuses to employ a single emoji to add some expression to his messages, he starts to use actual words to meet the same end.

Oikawa
Iwa-chaaaaaan...I had such a terrible day. I think i failed a quiz?? Like actually failed it????

Iwa-chan
i highly doubt it. you're smart as hell

A compliment. That is an actual compliment. Oikawa never deletes his text messages anyway, but Iwaizumi is sending more and more now that he never wants to lose.

Oikawa
I don't knooow...i have a really bad feeling about it (／ˍ・、)

Iwa-chan
oikawa...I can't even tell whats happening there. it's literally just a collection of dots and lines.

Oikawa
I'm CRYING iwa-chan! And wiping my tears with one hand

Iwa-chan
oh

Iwa-chan
I hope youre not really crying over something as stupid as a quiz you def didnt actually fail

Iwa-chan
but either way..i'm gonna be there tomorrow night

Iwa-chan
and i love you

Oikawa
(♡ﾟ▽ﾟ♡)

Oikawa
You make me so happy Iwa-chan

Iwa-chan
Good

Oikawa
Aaaand?

Iwa-chan
…..you make me happy too

All this happiness is doing very good things for Oikawa. He still hates being away from Iwaizumi, a lot, but he doesn't worry so much now. And when he's not worried, it's easier to be the better part of himself. The part that only acts like an ass when he chooses to (that doesn't actually sound all that much better when he thinks about it in those terms, but it's a fine line), and not because he can't get himself to stop.

In fact the fourth time Iwaizumi makes Oikawa shut up, on the day after he's arrived at Oikawa's for the weekend, it's not even because Oikawa needs him to, it's just because he wants it.

He hasn't forgotten the way it felt to have Iwaizumi force him to the ground, to have his hands fisted in his hair. For all of Iwaizumi's rough words and the way he doesn't hesitate to shove Oikawa away if he's being obnoxious, he tends to be very gentle with him when they're in bed. He smooths his hands over his skin like it's something wondrous and delicate, lowers his voice and brushes his lips over Oikawa's, whispering to him as he slowly fills him, and Oikawa loves it. He loves being treated like he's precious, he loves that side of Iwaizumi and the way it seems to exist only for him.

But…

As much as Oikawa likes to be taken care of, he really is more than capable of being handled without kid gloves, and he thinks he may need to find a way to make that happen.

They've already fucked once today. Lazy morning sex after they woke up, all soft kisses, with Oikawa straddling Iwaizumi and riding him into the sheets with slow rolls of his hips.

They went out briefly to get breakfast after, and then came straight back to Oikawa's room where they've been ever since, sprawled across his bed, alternately talking, kissing, reading, and half falling asleep.

Oikawa is pressed into Iwaizumi's side, both of them shirtless so he can feel warm skin on his chest and stomach.

"Iwa-chan," he says, nuzzling his head into the little hollow below Iwaizumi's shoulder. "Thank you for being here."

"Of course I'm here, stupid. Why are you getting all sappy?"

"Because that's what you do to me. You make me all gooey and pathetic, don't you know that?"

"You're always pathetic, and you don't have to thank me."

"Too bad, I'm going to anyway. I'm serious, Iwa-chan. It means a lot to me, the way you've really tried to talk to me more."

Iwaizumi huffs under Oikawa and lifts a hand to ruffle his hair.

"You're welcome, I guess. Thanks for being generally less annoying."

Oikawa purses his lips as he props himself up on an elbow to look down at Iwaizumi. "That hasn't been intentional."

"Oh," Iwaizumi says. "Hmm."

"Iwa-chan!" Oikawa sits up and bounces next to him. "Do you really think I'm annoying?"

"Yes," Iwaizumi says, crossing his arms behind his head and looking up at Oikawa blankly.

"Mean, Iwa-chan."

Iwaizumi's deadpan expression falters and his lips curve up on one side. "I kind of like it though."

"Kind of?" Oikawa asks.

"Sometimes."

God, Oikawa loves the way he looks right now. His hair softer than usual because he hasn't styled it, sticking up in some places and falling over his forehead in others. He still has that sexy little half smile, the one that says he really does like it a lot, and that combined with the way he's looking at Oikawa, his eyes teasing and bright...it's all having a very strong effect on Oikawa's body.

"Hmm," he says. "Does it make you a little hot?"

Iwaizumi shrugs, but his eyes are dragging over Oikawa and Oikawa loves when he looks at him like this, it's almost as good as having Iwaizumi's hands on him. It makes it very clear that it does affect his surly boyfriend, and this works out well for Oikawa, because the way Iwaizumi looks when he's annoyed makes Oikawa more than a little hot. And even though the sex this morning was good, so good, Oikawa wants it again, and he wants it harder this time. He wants Iwaizumi to have that look he gets when Oikawa is really riling him up, and he wants to be fucked just like that.

"It does, huh?" Oikawa asks, attempting to reign in his smile.

"Don't give yourself too much credit," Iwaizumi says. "A tiny bit hot. Nothing to write home about."

"How fortunate, since your letter writing skills leave much to be desired."

Iwaizumi reaches up to smack Oikawa's head. "Don't take that as a request to be as annoying as possible."

That's exactly what Oikawa is taking it as. He will push all the right buttons to get Iwaizumi where he wants him, probably in record time.

"I would never try to annoy you, Iwa-chan. I know how delicate your feelings are," Oikawa says with a smirk. The one he knows Iwaizumi hates (loves).

"You're not going to bug me," Iwaizumi says, closing his eyes and shutting Oikawa out. He can do absolutely nothing about the hard-on Oikawa can see him starting to sport through his soft basketball shorts.

"Of course not. Iwa-chan is a rock that cannot be moved. Iwa-chan has a steel-plated heart."

"I hate when you talk about me like that," Iwaizumi says, eyes still firmly closed. "Just say you."

"Iwa-chan sounds a little bit annoyed for someone who isn't going to let me bug him."

"God, Oikawa. Just shut up."

"Make me," Oikawa says, trying not to smile too genuinely, because Iwaizumi's eyes are open now.

He cocks an eyebrow at Oikawa, sitting up finally. "You realize I could, right? You're pretty strong, but I'm stronger."

"Are you, Iwa-chan? I'm not sure that's true."

"It's definitely true. I could take you apart and you know it."

"I don't, really. I'd like to believe you, but you're a notoriously bad judge of...well of everything, actually, and—"

"You need me to show you?" Iwaizumi asks, rising on his knees so he's looking down at Oikawa.

"Does that make you feel good? Being taller than me for once?"

Iwaizumi's eyes narrow, and Oikawa knows he is rapidly heading in the right direction. Iwaizumi is definitely hard.

"You know what would make me feel good?"

"Other than growing five inches? No, I don't."

"Oikawa, I fucking swear. If you say one more word I'm gonna shove your face in the mattress."

Oh, this is good. Iwaizumi looks mildly furious and excited all at once, and Oikawa is so ready for him to follow through on that threat.

"And then what?" Oikawa asks. He's trying to sound haughty but it mostly comes out breathless. He's ridiculously hard himself, considering they're not even touching now, and there's no way Iwaizumi doesn't see it.

"I'll fuck you so hard you can't talk at all."

Yes.

"One. More. Word," Oikawa says deliberately, eyebrows arched as annoyingly as possible.

Iwaizumi's eyes lock with his for just a moment and then that's it, it's on.

His hands are gripping Oikawa and turning him, flipping him roughly onto his stomach before he can even finish sucking in a surprised breath. One hand comes to his head, pressing it firmly to the bed as the other wraps around his waist and yanks him up on his knees, and Oikawa is whimpering before Iwaizumi has finished pulling his sweats and boxers over his ass with one hand, because God, oh God, he's really going to get fucked. He's so excited he's not sure he'd be able to breathe any better even if his face wasn't being forced against the sheets.

A warm hand slips between his legs, pushing them to spread them as wide as possible with his soft pants still around his knees, and then there's a brief release of pressure from the back of his head as Iwaizumi locates the lube. His fingers tangle back in Oikawa's hair as the cool liquid spills over his ass, dripping between his cheeks where he's already wet and open from this morning.

"Iwa…" he tries to say, his words becoming a muffled hum against cotton. He wants to tell Iwaizumi not to waste any time, not to bother with fingers and stretching, but he doesn't need to. Before he can attempt another word Iwaizumi's hot, thick erection is pressed to his entrance and then slamming inside him, so hard and sudden that Oikawa lets out an entirely undignified squeak. Iwaizumi has never filled him like this before, all at once, and never ever without carefully preparing him beforehand, and fuck, it feels amazing. It makes his whole body instantly hot and tight, makes the fine hairs at the back of his neck stand up and his legs tremble with the deep pleasure of being packed tightly so suddenly.

Iwaizumi folds over him, hot skin pressed to his back and hotter breath against his ear. "Okay?" he asks, voice as hushed as it always is when they're naked and entwined, but with a barely contained urgency that mirrors how tense his whole body feels behind Oikawa's. A spring ready to jump into action.

Oikawa nods, just a tiny movement of his head under Iwaizumi's hand, and that's all Iwaizumi needs. He pulls back from Oikawa so it's just his hands in his hair and on his hip, his cock in his ass, and he does exactly what he promised. He fucks him like he wants to break him. Slams his hips so hard against Oikawa, grinds so deep, it's like he's trying to force every word, every thought that could become a word, from his lungs, from his mind, and fill him with nothing but his own heat.

It doesn't take long. After the first violent thrusts Oikawa has lost the ability to form words, there are just sharp cries falling directly against the mattress. After a few more his mind is completely blank, it almost feels like it's shaking like the rest of him, shivering with pleasure and desire and need that can only be met by Iwaizumi's punishing rhythm. He's never felt the heat build up inside him so quickly, never felt it spilling into his limbs and locking his joints so soon after being entered. He's crying into the sheets, trembling under Iwaizumi's hands, everything in his body calling out don't stop, don't stop, don't stop. This is everything.

And then Iwaizumi stops. He withdraws from Oikawa completely, the only point of contact remaining is his hand, still firm on Oikawa's head. Oikawa sobs and Iwaizumi pulls at his hair, tugging his head to the side so, if he were capable of speaking, he'd be able to.

"Anything to say now?" he asks.

His voice might as well be sex itself, so low and rough Oikawa feels his cock dripping at the sound of it. He tries to shake his head, but can't move.

"Nothing at all?"

Oikawa whimpers. He's not sure what kind of rules they're operating under right now. He was supposed to shut up, and he'll gladly let Iwaizumi silence him for as long as he wants, but if he wants him to beg now, he'll do it without a second thought.

"Good," Iwaizumi says when Oikawa remains silent in his uncertainty. "Guess my work here is done."

"No!" Oikawa cries, his voice coming out so desperate and broken it barely sounds like his own. "Please, Iwa…"

"Oh," Iwaizumi says, leaning closer. The slick head of his cock pressing between Oikawa's cheeks and gliding across the tender rim of his entrance, back and forth. "Haven't quite left you speechless?"

"Please," Oikawa whispers again.

Iwaizumi's fingers loosen in his hair, stroking over it as he hushes him, a soft, gentle shhh, completely at odds with the way his fingers dig into Oikawa's hip the next moment as he drives back inside him like a battering ram.

"Ohh," Oikawa moans, his voice coming out clear and high before Iwaizumi is forcing him into the mattress again, drawing all the way out of his ass and then filling him again with a force that makes his hips ache and his hands grasp the sheets so hard his knuckles turn white. He does this over and over, before finally falling into a series of sharp, shallow thrusts that have Oikawa keening and Iwaizumi choking back deep groans above him.

"Fuck, Tooru," he gasps, his hips jerking unevenly into Oikawa's ass suddenly, his hand leaning so heavily on Oikawa's head that he's actually starting to struggle for breath as Iwaizumi shudders against him, finally letting go completely with another rough cry of Tooru as he fills him with heat that drips down the backs of his thighs. It's smeared against his skin with each last, shaking thrust as Iwaizumi empties himself completely inside him.

Oikawa is trembling so hard he would almost be afraid, were it not for Iwaizumi's skin, hot and comforting against him. He needs to breathe, needs to come, now, even if it's just by rutting against the sheets until this incredible heat is set free before it burns him alive.

"Good, Oikawa," Iwaizumi says, finally releasing his grip on his head and bringing both hands around Oikawa's waist to wrap around his cock.

"Ah," Oikawa sucks in a sharp breath, as much from the contact as from the need to fill his empty lungs with air. He's not sure he can even handle being touched at this point, it's almost too much. But Iwaizumi grips him firmly, pumping him with both hands in long, measured strokes, bending over him so his words fall warm on Oikawa's back.

"So good," he murmurs again. "Come for me now. Come on…"

Oikawa is already falling over the edge, already groaning and spilling into Iwaizumi's hands, again and again as he rocks into his grasp, and Iwaizumi pumps him until he's drained and weak.

"Hajime," he sighs, and Iwaizumi shifts behind him, finally withdrawing from him and pulling him into his arms, both of them sweaty and sticky and very much in need of a shower. Instead they become a satisfied tangle of limbs in the middle of Oikawa's disheveled bed. Iwaizumi's fingers dragging through Oikawa's tangled, sweat-soaked hair, his lips moving against his temple.

"I love you," he whispers. "I love you."

"Oh my God, Iwa," Oikawa croaks.

"You're okay, right?"

"Yes," Oikawa says. "Yes."

"You really wanted that, huh?"

"Could I have been any more obvious?" Oikawa asks, and Iwaizumi chuckles into his hair.

"You know, you don't have to piss me off if you want me to fuck you hard," he says.

"It's fun, though," Oikawa says, his eyelids and limbs and thoughts getting so heavy he knows he's almost gone, almost ready to fall silent again even if he wanted to talk.

"Yeah," Iwaizumi agrees. "I might have lied before. You might get me more than a tiny bit hot."

Oikawa smiles and doesn't say, I already knew that. He lets Iwaizumi have the last word, and lets himself drift out of consciousness in his arms.

*

The following months are both better and worse than the ones preceding them. Better because Iwaizumi hasn't once let up in his efforts to give Oikawa what he needs, because every night they talk on the phone before they go to bed, quiet conversations after Iwaizumi's roommate has already fallen asleep, and Oikawa feels so close to him even with the stupid distance between them.

It's worse because there is, unfortunately, more to their lives than each other, and the further they get into the school year, the busier they are. They can't always see each other every second weekend. By the spring they're down to one visit a month and this is not enough, not nearly enough, when up until this year they've seen each other daily.

There is one silver lining though, to the horrible stretched out spaces in between their visits—after all of those weeks apart, all of the text messages that have gotten progressively bolder and more graphic (God I wish you were touching me right now, Are your pants off yet? I'll tell you what I'd do if I were there...), when they do see each other, it's more electric than it's ever been. Clothes get tugged off while they're still saying hello, Oikawa loses count of all the hand jobs and blow jobs that get scattered between the times they have sex, because they can't keep their hands or mouths off of each other.

(Iwaizumi does attempt deepthroating again, sometime in January, and it is even more disastrous than the first go. This time when he chokes he clenches his teeth around Oikawa, Oikawa shrieks and yanks at Iwaizumi's hair in his panic to get those teeth off of him, and they both end up simultaneously apologizing and berating each other because, yes, it was all accidental, but it hurt. They firmly agree afterwards that there is no reason to revisit this experiment, and Oikawa swears to Iwaizumi that the way he gives head—all open mouthed kisses and slow drags of tongue, shallow sucking and his strong hand pumping Oikawa in time with the movements of his mouth, until Oikawa is trembling and babbling whispered words of praise—is everything he could ever want.)

In mid-March they are in the middle of one of Oikawa's visits to Iwaizumi's campus, and while they've already fucked twice the night before, and once this morning, plus a round of grinding in the shower that led to hand jobs for both of them, Oikawa is feeling insatiable. He knows it will probably be a month before he sees Iwaizumi again, before he gets to feel those hands sliding down his back, spreading his ass, pinning his legs open wide as he fucks him senseless (this happens about sixty percent of the time now, and Oikawa is very happy with the ratio of rough vs gentle sex that they've settled into.)

They are currently at an event at the university, a schmoozy, stuffy sort of thing in honor of one of Iwaizumi's professors who has been awarded some distinction that Oikawa knows nothing about, and Iwaizumi cannot explain it to him because he spends most of that particular class texting Oikawa. On the positive side, Iwaizumi is wearing splendidly fitted slacks and a lovely seafoam green dress shirt that is doing wonderful things as it sits against his warm, brown skin.

On the negative side…Oikawa is struggling desperately with seeing Iwaizumi like this, and not being able to do anything to him.

"Iwa-chan," Oikawa says (whines), an hour into their time drinking terrible punch and talking to people who don't seem to get Oikawa's jokes, "why don't we go outside for a bit and get some air?"

Iwaizumi tugs at his collar and looks around, clearly wanting to be finished here, too. "We shouldn't…everyone else in my class is still here, and he hasn't given his speech yet."

Oikawa sighs and immediately tries a more honest tactic. "Just for a bit, Iwa-chan…we'll come back. But when I say air, what I mean is…" His eyes dart around, make sure no one nearby seems to be focused on him, and then he presses his tongue to the inside of his cheek, pushing it outwards a few times in an imitation of the blow job he would very much like to give his well-dressed boyfriend right now.

Iwaizumi's eyes bulge and his cheeks, already flushed from this crowded room and his long-sleeved shirt, turn a perfect deep red, just the way they do when Oikawa is going down on him. "Oikawa!" he hisses, looking around at the students and professors milling around them.

"What, you don't want to?" Oikawa asks, and then he waves a hand over himself. "This isn't doing anything for you?"

"Of course it is," Iwaizumi growls, stepping closer so he can speak low in Oikawa's ear. "I've wanted to rip those stupid pants off you since you put them on. Your ass—" He stops suddenly, as someone passes by so closely that their shoulder bumps Oikawa's.

"What about my ass?" Oikawa asks, as soon as they have some semblance of privacy again. "You want it?"

Iwaizumi sputters just a bit, then his mouth forms a firm line, he looks around them once more, grabs Oikawa's arm, and starts pulling him across the room.

Oikawa is not exactly dragging his feet.

"Where are we—"

"I don't know," Iwaizumi says. "Anywhere."

They've made it to the other side of the large meeting room, and along this far wall there are two doors—one closed, one open—and that makes the decision for them because they have no time to waste. They go straight through the open door, closing it behind themselves with a halfhearted glance back into the room to see if anyone is watching their disappearance (who really knows, who really cares), and find themselves in a little maintenance room of some sort. Essentially a broom closet, that has a utility sink and a tall set of wire shelves loaded with cleaning products. All that really matters is that it's empty and the door locks.

Oikawa has just slid the lock into place and Iwaizumi is pushing him against the wall, the chest of his crisp white shirt pressed right to God knows what kind of filth, but Oikawa doesn't care.

"I was gonna…oh." Iwaizumi bites the back of his neck, reaching around him to fumble with his belt. "I was serious, before…let me suck—"

"No time," Iwaizumi whispers, jerking Oikawa's pants and boxers to his knees. "Can't miss the speech."

"So we're just…" Oh…yep, they're just going to. There's the clinking sound of Iwaizumi's belt opening, the soft slide of a zipper, and then Iwaizumi's smooth, heated erection is pressed against his bare ass. "Mm…so hard already, Iwa-chan?"

"Like you're not," Iwaizumi says, his lips brushing the shell of Oikawa's ear when he speaks. "I'm…shit, we need lube."

They both stop short at that realization, turning to look around the dark room, lit only by the orange glow of some kind of safety lights just below the ceiling. "There, there," Oikawa says, pointing to the sink where a bottle of lotion sits next to the soap dispenser.

Iwaizumi grabs it, already using his other hand to shove Oikawa back against the wall. A moment later a cool, slick finger is sliding straight inside him with zero warning.

"Ah," Oikawa squeaks.

"Shh…stupid," Iwaizumi hushes him in a rough whisper. "There are people right on the other side of that door."

"I…ah, I know…sorry."

"You're gonna have to be quiet," Iwaizumi warns him, wiggling his finger inside Oikawa and making him squirm.

"I—I'm not...very good at that."

"No…you're not. Fuck, Oikawa, I need you—"

"I'll try, I'll try…I can do it," Oikawa says quickly, pressing his forehead to the wall and willing himself to be silent even as Iwaizumi slips another finger in.

He lasts for about four thrusts, and then Iwaizumi twists his fingers, Oikawa forgets himself and moans like a porn star, and immediately a warm hand is pressed over his mouth.

"Oikawa!"

Oikawa tries to apologize, but something about having Iwaizumi's fingers in his ass and his hand tight over his mouth just makes him moan again, a muffled hum against Iwaizumi's palm.

"Shit," Iwaizumi breathes. "Do you like this?"

Oikawa nods, grinding his hips back against Iwaizumi's hand. Yes, he definitely likes this. And honestly, clearly, needs it, because there's no way he's going to be able to stay reasonably quiet on his own.

And this is how Iwaizumi ends up making Oikawa shut up once again, this time simply out of necessity.

"Your stupid big mouth," Iwaizumi mumbles against the base of Oikawa's neck, tongue darting out to lick the sweat from his skin. He scissors his fingers, then presses a third in (cue another muted gasp from Oikawa) and rubs hard inside him. "If you get us caught…"

Iwaizumi is already withdrawing his fingers with a wet squelch, and Oikawa muses that the slick sounds of bodies moving together are only going to get louder. If anyone gets close enough to this closet it won't just be his stifled moans that give them away.

"Hey," Iwaizumi says, low in his ear as he brings his slicked up cock to Oikawa's entrance. "You sure you're okay like this?" He lifts his hand so Oikawa is free to respond.

"Yes, put it in me," Oikawa half whispers, half whines, and Iwaizumi doesn't waste any time. His hand closes back over Oikawa's mouth as he rolls his hips until he's balls deep, and Oikawa is breathing rapidly through his nose, his hands scrabbling at the wall in front of him, desperate for some kind of purchase.

"Good boy," Iwaizumi says, when Oikawa does nothing but hiccup helplessly into his hand as Iwaizumi pulls out and rocks back into him, his free hand curving over Oikawa's hip and then sliding under his shirt. His fingers are spread wide, pressed firmly low on Oikawa's stomach as he fills him again, his hand tightening over Oikawa's mouth to catch his answering gasp. "…take me so good."

Oikawa whimpers low in his throat and hopes the buzz of conversation outside the door will be enough to hide it. He can't help thinking, though, that anyone who walked in on them would be lucky for the view. Iwaizumi's exposed ass, gloriously toned, flexing as he thrusts into Oikawa. His own thighs, bare and…let's be honest here…very attractive, lean and muscled and trembling more and more each time Iwaizumi fucks him into the wall.

"Ah…fuck, Tooru." Iwaizumi's voice is so soft Oikawa can barely hear it over his own frenzied breathing, even though the words are falling right against his ear. "…hot…it's so hot."

Oikawa doesn't know if he means this room, which is literally sweltering now, or this situation, which is…yes, fucking hot. He can't spare more than half a moment to consider it when all of his focus is being drawn to Iwaizumi's thick length driving into him, his hipbones digging into Oikawa's ass as he steps closer, pressing him so his entire body is flush against the wall and grinding into him so hard, so good, Oikawa feels like screaming is the only way he can handle the burning pleasure coursing through him. He keens into Iwaizumi's hand instead.

"Always so hot and tight for me, Tooru," Iwaizumi continues, his hand finally releasing the pressure he's been keeping over Oikawa's stomach and drawing both of their hips away from the wall, just enough that he can catch Oikawa's cock in his grip. "All I wanna do is be inside you."

Tears spill over Oikawa's cheeks, over Iwaizumi's hand, from those words, from the dizzying, heady arousal of being taken like this, one thin wall away from a room full of people, from Iwaizumi's hands so tight over his mouth and around his cock. The way he's slamming into Oikawa now, his steady rhythm lost to rough, erratic thrusts. He's going to explode, wants to explode. He just needs—

"Ahh, Tooru," Iwaizumi croons as his jerking thrusts suddenly slow to deep rolls of his hips and he shivers against Oikawa, filling him with his release for the second time today, dripping hot down his legs. His hand stills on Oikawa's cock and it doesn't even matter, Oikawa is coming anyway, clenching his teeth to keep himself from moaning so loudly that even Iwaizumi's broad hand could do nothing to keep the sound in.

Iwaizumi pumps him through it once he feels him spilling, rocking into him with each slow stroke and whispering praise into his ear. Not saying a word about the tears still wetting his hand as Oikawa shakes like a leaf between Iwaizumi's solid body and the wall that both his hands are splayed against.

A minute later, when they're drooping against each other, sweaty and drained, Iwaizumi's hand finally falling from Oikawa's mouth to brush softly down his throat, a round of applause suddenly starts up on the other side of the door.

"Oh," Oikawa says, "I'm sorry, Iwa-chan. I think we missed the speech."

Iwaizumi laughs, a soft exhalation against Oikawa's jaw. "Fuck the speech. That's for us. For you…that's the quietest you've ever been."

"You like me better that way?" Oikawa asks, looking down at his flushed, wet cock still in Iwaizumi's hand and wondering how they'll deal with the mess. Trying not to think that maybe the answer could be yes.

"Uh-uh," Iwaizumi says without hesitation, pulling out of Oikawa and turning him gently so his back is to the wall, and Iwaizumi is pressed warm and comforting against his chest. "I like you every way, and this was really good but...I like making you scream."

"Iwa-chan is so romantic when his pants are down," Oikawa says, blushing and smiling and completely negating his own attempt at teasing.

Iwaizumi rolls his eyes, tucking himself into his pants one-handed. "Is that really romantic?"

"I don't know." Oikawa leans past Iwaizumi to grab a few sheets of paper towel from the roll hanging over the sink. "It makes me feel good."

Iwaizumi catches his eye as he accepts one of the sheets and wipes his hand off. "You're so honest when your pants are down."

Oikawa tries to look affronted, as much as he can while dabbing at the cum still dribbling down the backs of his thighs. "I'm always honest with you."

"Only because I can see right through you," Iwaizumi says. He helps Oikawa pull up his pants and does his belt back up for him.

Oikawa huffs and leans into Iwaizumi, pressing his face to his shoulder. Iwaizumi can see right through him, and yet he still loves him, still puts up with all his teasing. He takes care of him, and makes him feel like he's someone worthy of being held the way Iwaizumi always holds him after they've made love.

"You want me to be honest?" Oikawa asks, melting against Iwaizumi as those strong arms come to wrap around him and pull him closer.

"Go for it," Iwaizumi says.

"I could spend the rest of my life in this gross little closet, if I could spend it here with you."

Iwaizumi is quiet, Oikawa is only sure he heard him because his arms tightened around him at his words.

"Don't say stuff like that," he finally grumbles. "It makes me all…"

"All what?" Oikawa asks, pressing his hand to the back of Iwaizumi's neck and feeling the heat there.

"Just shut up," Iwaizumi says, his hand coming up to carefully card through Oikawa's hair, saying with his touch what he's struggling to communicate with his words. "I just…I love you so much sometimes I think it will kill me."

"Just sometimes?"

"You want me to drop dead?" Iwaizumi asks and Oikawa laughs.

"Of course not, Iwa-chan. I just want you to love me as much as I love you."

"I do, stupid. But we can't stay in this closet forever. Not really."

"Maybe five more minutes though," Oikawa says. He doesn't want to move, no matter how hot and stuffy it is in here. Not with the way Iwaizumi is holding him so close he feels every beat of his heart against his own chest. "We've already missed the speech."

"Five more minutes," Iwaizumi agrees.

It ends up being significantly more. They end up sliding to the floor and kissing in the dark until they fall asleep, with Iwaizumi's back to the sink cabinet and Oikawa folded up in his arms. They're caked in sweat and their limbs are tight and cramped when they're woken hours later by a custodian banging on the door.

It is arguably the best visit they've had to date.

*

The final two months of the school year are hectic, with hardly enough time to fit in all the texting and talking on the phone they've grown used to, much less time for frequent visits. Oikawa misses Iwaizumi so terribly he can feel it in him all the time, making his chest tight and his hands restless. His friends start to flick him in class when he's tapping his pen or fingers on his desk. At volleyball practice his coach pulls him aside and tells him he needs to focus, the year isn't over yet.

The year may not be over, but Oikawa is feeling beyond finished with this whole shitty long distance situation. He's barely here. He's untethered and drifting, without the person who grounds him right next to him where he's supposed to be.

Oikawa doesn't have any time to spare, he has to take time from Iwaizumi to make it happen, but he directs his focus towards finding a way to make things easier for both of them. This strains things a little, because Oikawa doesn't want to tell Iwaizumi what he's doing yet, and Iwaizumi is too good of a boyfriend to not notice that Oikawa is being weird. Particularly as the year is drawing to a close and Oikawa is frantically trying to complete his classwork, study for exams, and ensure that the following year will be even better than this one has been.

Iwa-chan
dumbass, text me back. u okay?

Oikawa
Yes!! Practice ran long today. Sorry! (シ_ _)シ

Iwa-chan
i don't even…it's fine. I have a little time before I meet some guys to study, want me to call?

Oikawa
Aah...i'd love you to, but I gotta run (T_T) Have a meeting, probably be late tonight

Iwa-chan
Ok...2morrow then, yeah?

Oikawa
Sure thing Iwa-chan! Love you!!!!

Iwaizumi doesn't text back after that, not until much later when he sends another message asking if everything is okay.

Oikawa doesn't want to lie to him, but he isn't sure yet that his plans are going to fall into place, and he really wants to surprise him if they do. It's just one more week until the school year ends and he'll see Iwaizumi. He'll be able to talk to him face to face.

Oikawa
Everything's fine Iwa-chan!!! Busy busy!

Iwa-chan
Right, yeah. me too.

Oikawa
We'll be back home soon (◕‿◕)♡

Iwa-chan
seems like too long still

Oikawa's chest gets even tighter at that. It does seem too long, every day that they're apart is one day too many. He doesn't say a word, but he mentally squeezes Iwaizumi tight and counts down the hours, crossing his fingers that when he sees Iwaizumi he'll have more than hugs and kisses to give him.

Iwaizumi arrives home half a day later than Oikawa, so Oikawa is standing at the station waiting for him when he steps off the train. He's expecting to be pulled into Iwaizumi's arms, kissed over and over while they exclaim over how happy they are that summer break has begun, and they have weeks and weeks ahead of them that can be spent in any way they choose.

Iwaizumi is reserved though. He kisses Oikawa's cheek, he refuses Oikawa's offer to help carry his things with a shake of his head, and they walk quietly home together, Oikawa standing awkwardly just outside the door after Iwaizumi has stepped inside.

"I can help you unpack," he says.

"You don't have to." Iwaizumi is looking at the bags in his hands, not at Oikawa.

"I want to, dummy," Oikawa says, nudging Iwaizumi's shoulder and pushing past him into the house. Iwaizumi follows him in, up the stairs to where his room sits in the tiny upper level, across from a bathroom and his mother's office. Oikawa goes straight in and sits down on Iwaizumi's bed. "What's wrong with you?" he asks, as soon as Iwaizumi has come in and shut the door behind him, even though no one is home.

Iwaizumi looks around the room, his eyes skipping past Oikawa like he isn't there, then he finally comes and sits on the edge of the bed.

"I don't know. It's stupid."

Oikawa bites back the jibe that almost slips out, Of course it is, what else could you manage? He may be an asshole sometimes, but he knows this is not one of those times when Iwaizumi is okay with being teased.

"Tell me," he says, touching a finger to Iwaizumi's chin and turning him so they're facing each other.

"Do you want to break up?" Iwaizumi asks, and Oikawa feels his stomach drop with all the queasy force of an elevator plummeting ten levels at once.

"What?"

"Do you want to break up," Iwaizumi repeats. "I want you to just tell me, if you do. Stop sending me half-assed, vague messages about how busy you are, if this long distance thing is too hard and you just want out."

"No!" Oikawa says, practically yells, grabbing Iwaizumi's hands and squeezing them in his own. "No, Iwa-chan."

Iwaizumi looks half relieved and half skeptical. "So you've really just been so impossibly busy that we've barely talked the past month?"

"You've missed me?" Oikawa asks. It's totally beside the point and there are so many other things he needs to say right now, but he can't help the way it makes his heart skip to know that Iwaizumi has felt his absence this strongly.

"Of course I have, what's the matter with you, Oikawa? You know how much I love you."

"I know, I know you do. I just…Iwa-chan I've missed you so much, so much…I couldn't focus on anything but making that better. I can't keep missing you as much as I have been."

Iwaizumi pulls his hands out of Oikawa's, rubbing his sweaty palms over his thighs. "I don't understand…you do want to break up then?"

"No!" Oikawa says, and then he throws himself at Iwaizumi, pressing his face into his neck as they fall to the bed.

"Oikawa, what the—"

"Listen!" Oikawa says, bracing himself with his arms on either side of Iwaizumi's head, his knees tight around the other boy's hips. "I never want to break up. I want to be with you all the time, any time I possibly can be."

"Then—"

"Iwa-chan, hush." Oikawa leans down and kisses him. "I just wanted to surprise you. It took a hell of a lot of string pulling because I started everything too late, but I'm transferring. I'm transferring to your school."

Iwaizumi doesn't say a word at first, he doesn't even open his mouth. But his hands move to Oikawa's hips and his eyes are wide.

"You're…what?"

"I'm transferring. It's all officially official as of yesterday. We'll be going there together in the fall. We won't have to say goodbye."

"Oikawa…no. Your school has a better team, I can't ask you to—"

"You didn't. And I don't care. I don't care, Iwa-chan."

"But you do," Iwaizumi says, shaking his head even as his fingers tighten around Oikawa, slipping under his shirt to press into the soft skin at his waist as he tugs him a little closer. "You like to win, you like being the best, and—"

"Hey," Oikawa cuts him off. "I'm not just a pretty face, you know. I've learned a few things, being in love with you."

"What…" Iwaizumi gets two perfect patches of bright pink, right on the edges of his irresistibly kissable cheekbones. "What have you learned?"

"I've learned that I have the best, right here." He brushes the tip of his nose over those rosy cheeks. "You're it, Iwa-chan."

Iwaizumi swallows. Oikawa watches his throat move and then leans in to kiss it.

"You should have told me, you selfish idiot," Iwaizumi growls, his words humming against Oikawa's lips. "I thought you were trying to distance yourself before school ended so it would be easier to end it when we came home."

"Oh, Iwa-chan…no. I'm so sorry." Oikawa kisses his way back up to Iwaizumi's face, pressing his lips to still flushed skin. "I just didn't want to jinx it. I wanted to be able to see you, just like this, and tell you I'd go anywhere for you."

"You're the worst," Iwaizumi says, his green eyes shining with tears.

"I love you," Oikawa says.

"I hate you." The words are a soft brush of lips and warm breath against the corner of Oikawa's mouth as Iwaizumi pulls him down to kiss him. He runs his tongue along Oikawa's lips before using it to part them, to lick into his mouth and suck Oikawa's lower lip into his own. He turns his head and draws Oikawa closer still, like he can't possibly get him close enough, and it's the best kind of kiss. The kind that feels like you're relying on each other for each breath and you'll die if you ever pull apart.

"You want me to come, right?" Oikawa asks, when his lips are swollen and his mouth is filled with nothing but the delicious taste of Iwaizumi.

"I want you to come," Iwaizumi says, his hands slipping up the back of Oikawa's shirt to trail warm fingertips up his spine.

Oikawa shivers, his hips instinctively rolling against Iwaizumi's. "You want me to come?" he asks, because there is a gorgeous boy beneath him, and all of the seriousness of their plans and feelings aside, Oikawa can't be close to him like this and not be distracted by his need to be even closer.

"Yeah…yeah I want you to," Iwaizumi says, his voice quiet and rough now.

"How do you want it?" Oikawa asks, shifting down on Iwaizumi's legs and tugging his shorts and underwear past muscular thighs, and then all the way to his ankles. They get tangled there and Iwaizumi kicks at them until his legs are free and Oikawa is hovering over him again, eager to get started, to give Iwaizumi anything he wants after the turmoil he unintentionally put him through. "You want me on my knees? Want me to try to stay quiet while you give it to me?"

"No…fuck, though, Oikawa. Who said it was okay for you to be so hot?"

"It's the way God made me, Iwa-chan," Oikawa says solemnly and Iwaizumi can't even roll his eyes or flick Oikawa in the forehead, he just smiles and shakes his head.

"I want to hear you. I want…God, I've missed your stupid voice. I want you to talk…just talk."

"Just talk?" Oikawa asks, dragging his hardening length over Iwaizumi's. The scrape of denim over Iwaizumi's bare skin making him hiss even as he lifts his hips into it, seeking out more.

"Get your clothes off and fuck yourself while you're talking," he says. "You can handle multitasking, right?"

"Iwa-chan, I truly can't tell if you're just insulting me here, or if you literally want me to—"

"Oikawa."

Oikawa blinks at Iwaizumi innocently. He is not feigning ignorance because he gets off on dirty words on Iwaizumi's tongue. Not at all. "Yes?"

"Get the lube, take my cock like I know you want to, and give me all the words you've been keeping back while you drove me fucking crazy the last month."

Ah, that's all he wanted to hear. "I can do that," Oikawa says.

"Good."

Oikawa finds a possibly concerningly old bottle of lube in one of Iwaizumi's dresser drawers (oh well, they've used worse), and pulls off his t-shirt and jeans while Iwaizumi watches him from the bed, his own shirt discarded on the floor now. He drags his boxers down slowly after that, very aware of the way Iwaizumi catches his lower lip between his teeth as he takes in Oikawa's flushed thighs and embarrassingly hard cock.

He straddles Iwaizumi again, about to reach behind himself and get himself ready, but Iwaizumi pulls him forward so Oikawa is kneeling over his face instead, being tugged down until his legs are spread wide and Iwaizumi's tongue is flicking hot and wet at his entrance.

"Oh, Iwa…" Oikawa sighs, a shiver working through him as Iwaizumi traces his rim with the tip of his tongue.

"Talk," Iwaizumi says. "Tell me why you decided to transfer."

Oikawa has to steady himself with his hands on the headboard to be able to talk at all while Iwaizumi's hands are smoothing over his ass, spreading it open as his tongue dips inside.

"Mm…I never wanted to be at different schools. I would have followed you there…ah…" Iwaizumi is teasing his rim again, holding Oikawa tightly so he can't try to press closer to his mouth and get that tongue inside him again. "…in the first place, but we weren't dating then and…Iwa, please…yes. And I was…so dumb. I thought volleyball was…enough, but…God, Iwa…"

This is harder than he thought it was going to be, with Iwaizumi fucking him with his tongue now, using his hands to encourage Oikawa to move over him, to press himself down and let that hot muscle lick into him as deep as Iwaizumi can reach.

"But what?" Iwaizumi asks, withdrawing his tongue and shuffling around in the sheets. When his tongue comes back he presses a finger in along with it and Oikawa almost loses his grip on the headboard.

"But…" What was he saying? Something about volleyball? Oh…right. "But it's not…I don't…I thought I needed volleyball, but it's you…it's you I need. I—" Whatever Oikawa was about to say—he's not even sure anymore what words he was trying to form—is lost when Iwaizumi curls two fingers inside him while lapping at his rim, and Oikawa is certain that his legs have become boneless and can't possibly hold him over Iwaizumi's face another second. He doesn't stop talking, but it's just Iwaizumi's name he says now, each time those fingers rub inside him and make his head spin. Iwa, Iwa, Iwa…

"Now," Iwaizumi says suddenly, slipping out of Oikawa and pulling at his hips, dragging him back down to his lap. "Take me now…and don't stop talking."

Oikawa finds Iwaizumi's cock with his hand, slick and hard and ready, and lines himself up, sighing with relief as he sinks over it, feeling himself stretch to accommodate Iwaizumi. To make himself complete.

"God…Iwa, you make me feel so good. Everything's right with you…I'm right with you."

"Yeah, you are," Iwaizumi says, pulling Oikawa into him as he rolls his hips. "Feel that? The way you take me like you were made for me?"

Oikawa digs his fingers into Iwaizumi's shoulders and lets himself moan as loud as he wants to when Iwaizumi grinds into him, feeling him so deep inside it almost makes him cry to know that Iwaizumi has touched him where no one else ever has or will.

"I was," he says. "I'm better with you…I'm…I'm…"

"Keep talking," Iwaizumi says, letting his own hips sink back to the bed so Oikawa can take over, sliding up and down Iwaizumi's length while Iwaizumi looks up at him with warm, hazy eyes, his hands loose on Oikawa's hips now. "Please."

"I can't…I can't think, Iwa…" Oikawa moans again as he drops hard on Iwaizumi's cock, feels the thick base stretching him as he bears down harder.

"I don't want you to think," Iwaizumi says, running his hands up Oikawa's sides and then stroking slowly down his chest, past his abs, until he's closing them over Oikawa's cock. "I don't want you to be clever or funny or sexy…not right now. I just want you to be you…just give me you."

"You've always had me," Oikawa says, leaning down to kiss Iwaizumi as best he can when his arms and legs are starting to shake and Iwaizumi is thumbing over the wet tip of his cock. He mouths at the corner of Iwaizumi's lips and Iwaizumi licks his jaw, and this is close enough. "You're going to have me every day."

"Like this?" Iwaizumi asks, and Oikawa leans back to see his lips tipping up in a teasing smile.

"Mm…like this." Oikawa circles his hips, making himself gasp as the shifting angle presses Iwaizumi's cock against his prostate, and drawing a deep groan from Iwaizumi. "And every way. I'm gonna—"

"Hang on," Iwaizumi says suddenly, sitting up and lifting Oikawa with him, then dropping him on his back and pressing his legs apart as he moves between them. He pushes his cock back in, hitting right there, right where Oikawa needs him. His hand comes back to Oikawa's flushed length and he starts to stroke him in time with his thrusts. "What are you gonna do?"

Oikawa is quite sure he's going to come in the next thirty seconds, he's sure he's going to whimper Iwaizumi's name and make any number of embarrassing faces and sounds that won't bother him, because it's Iwa-chan. He barely has the breath to speak, but he tries, each word coming out a little higher, a little more wrecked.

"I'm gonna see you every morning. We'll…oh, yes. Yeah, just like that…we'll have breakfast together and I'll…I'll text you constantly even though I'm gonna…stalk you and drag you into empty classrooms to…ah, God, I can't…"

"Don't stop," Iwaizumi says, almost as breathless as Oikawa, his hand falling still on Oikawa's cock.

"Hajime."

"Don't stop," Iwaizumi repeats, his eyes so heated, his voice so raw, that Oikawa can't deny him.

"I'll kiss you all over…between every class. And I'll…leave little notes…on your desk…and…and sneak into your bed at night to—"

"Our bed," Iwaizumi says, palming over the head of Oikawa's cock and then starting to jerk him again.

"Huh?"

"Our bed. We'll get our own place. Just you and—"

Oikawa doesn't mean to interrupt him, he wants to hear those words again and again, but right now he's crying out, arching his back and pressing into Iwaizumi as his vision goes dark and he comes in hot spurts over his own chest.

"You and me, Tooru," Iwaizumi says, stroking him through it, his hips slowing.

"Yes," Oikawa says, his head tipped back, his lips and fingertips tingling from a lack of air, from an abundance of Iwaizumi. He finds the energy to tilt his hips, inviting Iwaizumi to keep going.

"Are you saying yes to sex, or yes to moving in together?"

"To both, to everything," Oikawa says, lifting his legs to wrap them around Iwaizumi's waist and draw him closer. "Come in me, live with me, just…"

Iwaizumi folds himself over Oikawa's chest and fucks him with deep, rolling thrusts. The slow kind that Oikawa feels spreading him open by degrees each time until Iwaizumi's hips are flush against his ass, before he empties him and fills him again.

"Don't…stop," Iwaizumi says.

Oikawa is all shivering nerves and fuzzy, half-formed thoughts that he can't put together into words. Just you and me, and warm, hazy images of coming home to Iwaizumi every day. Having a home with Iwaizumi.

All he can manage are progressively more breathless repetitions of love you, and Hajime, until Iwaizumi's mouth is falling open, his spine arching back as his climax drives his hips into Oikawa in a last shuddering thrust that draws both of their voices out once more. Hajime on Oikawa's lips, and a wordless moan on Iwaizumi's. That low, pained noise that sounds like it's being dragged up from the deepest part of him, that always tells Oikawa he's given his boyfriend the best he could.

He stays inside Oikawa for a few minutes, just looking down at him, smoothing his hands up and down his thighs and watching the way they tremble under his fingertips. Oikawa looks up at him in a foggy state of ecstasy, marveling at the work of art between his legs. The strong lines of his shoulders, the sweat shining between hard pectoral muscles and glistening along the edges of abs that would make Oikawa weep with envy if they weren't his to enjoy.

"Have I told you lately how beautiful you are?" Oikawa asks.

Iwaizumi snorts, shuffling back to finally pull out of Oikawa. "You tell me every time you're drunk on sex. I'm starting to think it's the only time you think it."

Oikawa shakes his head vehemently, pulling at Iwaizumi until he drops heavily beside him. "Not so, Iwa-chan. I always think it."

"Alright," Iwaizumi says, draping an arm over Oikawa.

"Would you like me to say it more often? Or was this a one time thing?"

"What?"

"This telling me not to stop talking thing. Should I have savored it more, or is it going to become a regular occurrence?"

Iwaizumi huffs against Oikawa's shoulder, his fingers tracing figure eights over his waist. "I don't know, probably not." There's a long pause, more slow movements of fingertips over sensitive skin in the dip below Oikawa's hipbone. "Maybe. I don't care what you do, Tooru. I just want you to do it with me."

Oikawa beams up at the ceiling and brings his hand to cup the back of Iwaizumi's head, to feel that soft, dark hair between his fingers. "That's the plan," he says. "The entire point of Operation: Transfer to Iwa-chan's University."

"Thank you…for that. For doing that for me."

"For us," Oikawa says.

"Yeah," Iwaizumi agrees, his voice so soft, so fond, it makes Oikawa squeeze his eyes shut so they don't get any ideas about filling up with tears. "God, we're disgusting."

Oikawa laughs, his stomach pressing up against Iwaizumi's warm arm. "Almost too cute, even for me."

"Nothing's too cute for you," Iwaizumi says.

"Iwa-chaaan, that's so sweet!" Oikawa chirps, his hand tightening in Iwaizumi's hair and drawing him closer.

"Huh? It wasn't supposed to be."

"Wha—"

"I meant you think every ridiculous, over the top thing under the sun is cute."

"Oh," Oikawa deflates entirely. "I thought…"

"I know what you thought. But you're not as cute as you think, Oikawa."

Oikawa sits up at that, removing himself from their happy, sweaty little nest. "Rude, Iwa-chan. Why are you killing the mood like this?"

Iwaizumi appears completely unfazed, he just looks up at Oikawa with that warmth in his eyes that does all of the best things to Oikawa's heart.

"You're not cute, stupid," he says, reaching up to cup the back of Oikawa's neck and tug him back down. "You're so much more than cute."

"I'm…"

"You're…gorgeous." Iwaizumi kisses Oikawa's cheek, letting his lips brush over it until they're moving butterfly soft against his ear. "Stunning," he says, before pressing a line of soft, wet kisses along his jaw and then down the side of his neck. "Breathtaking," he whispers into the hollow at the base of Oikawa's throat.

"Iwa-chan…"

"Hmm?" Iwaizumi pulls Oikawa until he's lying beside him again, nose to nose.

"I don't…"

"What…you don't have anything to say?" 

Oikawa does not. He is full to the brim, but not with any words, clever or otherwise. He shakes his head and smiles, and he does cry a little, but it doesn't matter. Iwaizumi has always been good with his tears and snot and quivering chin.

"That's okay," Iwaizumi says. "I love you either way."

Whether he can't shut up, or can't say a word. Whether they're driving each other crazy, or bringing each other to the edge of bliss and tipping over it together.

Sometimes Oikawa says stupid things. Sometimes he makes bad choices because he can be selfish, and needy, and proud.

Sometimes, though, he does the exact right thing, and he has a feeling that's going to get easier and easier to do. Because he's lucky enough to be in love with someone who makes him want to be selfless, who makes him feel treasured and humbled and whole.

So Oikawa knows that what matters isn't how much he says or doesn't say.

It's what he does. It's who he loves. And who loves him.