Chapter Text
It was on an unremarkable workday that he first smelled it: a faint scent of sweetness.
Gao Tu had just closed the door behind him, having delivered the financial reports he'd requested.
Shen Wenlang frowned. Gao Tu was always careful not to bring in any scents to his office, knowing how sensitive his nose was to smells. Once, in his impatience for a report, he'd flung open the door to demand what was taking so long and saw that Gao Tu was hastily wiping his mouth and hands because he'd been in the middle of eating lunch. So for Gao Tu to be so careless was… odd. Also, Gao Tu was not a huge fan of sweet things, preferring savoury ones.
Shen Wenlang mentally shrugged and focussed once more on the reports.
~*~*~*~
Gao Tu was puzzled as he closed the door of Shen Wenlang's office.
While he knew that Shen Wenlang liked sweet things, he was not in the habit of snacking. It was three square meals a day and mostly at restaurants and cafes because he didn't like the smells to linger in his office. So the faint scent of sweetness he smelled made no sense, since Shen Wenlang most certainly did not keep foodstuff or treats in his office.
Gao Tu thought no more of it as he saw the ten emails waiting in his inbox.
~*~*~*~
He was feeling restless, caged. He got out of his chair and paced, trying to shake off the feeling so he could concentrate.
He was about to head outside for a walk—maybe the fresh air would clear his head—when there was a knock.
“Come!”
Gao Tu walked in carrying a stack of folders. “Shen-zong, Research has dropped off their project proposals and require your approval.”
He gestured for Gao Tu to leave them on his desk. Gao Tu bowed and quietly exited.
Feeling a sense of calm suddenly settle, he returned to his desk and began reading through each folder.
~*~*~*~
He awoke sweating.
As he threw aside the covers, Gao Tu rubbed his eyes and face wearily. He had never been a deep sleeper ever since he presented, a side effect of the suppressants he took. But lately, the quality of his sleep had worsened because he was plagued by dreams—memories—of that night. He knew whom he'd mate—slept with that night, but as his heat and instincts took over his higher reasoning, he could only recall flashes and moments: searing touches, hot lips kissing and exploring every inch of him, the need he felt in the core of his being when Wenlang (“Alpha!”) had touched him there, the intense pain where they had joined, the sensation of soaring just before he knew nothing more.
Until the following morning, when the enormity of the situation had hit him after he'd awoken and found Shen Wenlang’s arms around him, nose pressed against the back of his neck. He'd extricated himself as quickly as he could while not waking his alph—the sleeping man. He had only allowed himself one backward glance at the reposing form of the holder of his heart before closing the door.
He had no idea how he had managed to get home. All he remembered was emailing a request to HR for a few days of sick leave before stripping and crawling into bed and sobbing as inconsolably as he'd done the morning that he'd found his mother's cold body collapsed on the floor of her bedroom.
He sighed. Wasn't being in Shen Wenlang’s presence five days a week at work not torturous enough? Now he had the exquisite privilege of reliving every night in his dreams what it felt like to be as intimate with the man as his heart could desire but reality would never allow him to have beyond that one taste?
He groaned, hugging himself in a futile attempt to restrict the hollow chasm within, that deep yearning that his battered, ignored, underdeveloped omega core clawed and screamed at him for.
Knowing that it was useless going back to sleep—and dreading another encounter with those memories—he sat up and began browsing his work email, using work, as he always did, to distract him from his personal troubles.
~*~*~*~
The sweet scent was now a constant presence whenever they were in his office. And it was getting stronger.
What still confused him was why he only smelled it in his office and nowhere else. He’d been checking: every time he went past Gao Tu’s desk, every time they passed each other in the common areas or corridors. No scent. The boardroom meetings he disregarded because of how well-ventilated they were designed to be—noone wanted to deal with the natural biological odours that accumulated when a dozen or so bodies congregated in an enclosed space for a span of time.
He’d had one of the engineers check his office for leaks or cracks where air could enter from other areas of the building. Nothing. Testing of the ventilation system also revealed that it was functioning normally.
He was going through the pile of documents that needed his signature when there was a sudden burst of the now-familiar scent, undercoated with another—also too—familiar scent.
Sage.
He suddenly slumped forward, clutching his head. Images, dozens of images flashed before his mind’s eye. Images from that night, the ones he could never recall with any clarity, the ones that haunted his dreams and yet receded the following morning, even as he tried to remember: the warm and pliant body beneath him, the breathy moans, the sweet kisses, the intoxicating scent (“Smells so good…”), the final release, the soft skin he cuddled against just before losing consciousness (“A-Tu…”).
~*~*~*~
As Gao Tu waited for Shen Wenlang to sign the stack of documents, he smelled that familiar sweet scent yet again. Try as he might to locate the source, he had yet to succeed. A sudden whiff of iris assaulted his nose—Shen Wenlang was getting impatient.
And then his scent gland throbbed.
The suppressant patch suddenly became so unpleasant that he wanted nothing else but to rip it off. Only his ingrained terror of being found out—especially by his boss—prevented him from acting on that impulse.
But then he saw Shen Wenlang clutching his head as if in pain.
“Shen-zong, are you alright? Can I get you anything to help—”
“OUT!”
He obeyed, scrambling for the door. He nearly collided with the Head of Research in the corridor near the kitchen, his mind focussed on getting to the washroom.
“Apologies, Li-butou!”
“Oh, no worries, Secretary Gao.” As Gao Tu passed him, he suddenly called out, “Has Shen-zong finally decided to switch his flavour of tea?”
Gao Tu stopped short. And turned. “N–no, Li-butou. Why… why do you ask?”
“Oh, just that sweet herbal scent that I sensed on you just now. I know you never wear scented products because of Shen-zong, and the only scent that ever emanates from your clothes is that white tea he likes so much.”
“Oh, um, I… I had a sudden craving for a pastry from the tea shop across the street. Maybe one of their blends seeped into my suit,” he said, hoping desperately that he would not be called out for such a poorly-thoughtout lie.
But it seemed to convince the Alpha, who grinned and said, “Well, you should definitely let Shen-zong smell it. Maybe you could finally convince him to try something different for a change! What is life without variety!”
Gao Tu gave a weak smile and then bowed his head when the Head of Research waved goodbye.
After sequestering himself into one of the stalls, Gao Tu sniffed his suit jacket. The scent of sage and that sweetness flooded his nostrils. He stood, shocked. Had he been the source of the sweet scent all this time? Was his scent changing as a side effect of the suppressants? He couldn’t recall any of the warning sheets listing it as a known side effect. But surely he would’ve noticed the scent pervading his apartment after two weeks of its presence in only one isolated location.
His scent gland throbbed again, releasing another burst of sage. Quickly, he retrieved the ever-present tin from his inner suit pocket, took a deep breath, and injected the needle.
When the coast was clear, he discreetly headed toward the service elevators. He needed fresh air to dissipate the smell lingering on his clothes.
~*~*~*~
Shen Wenlang was still sitting, his mind now fixated on how Gao Tu had lied to him about being a Beta, when a strong stench of orchid brought him quickly back to reality.
“Fuck off!” he said without even moving.
“Tut-tut. What are you still doing here at this hour? Even your doe-eyed, loyal puppy has gone back to his little kennel for the night.”
“Don’t call him that!” He vaguely recalled first sending Gao Tu out of his office when the flashes of memory hit and then dismissing him when the Bet—Omega had stuck his head in to ask if he needed anything before he left.
“We are definitely in a bad mood today. Who has pissed you off now?”
Shen Wenlang sighed and sat back, looking at the ceiling. “The Omega from that night at X Hotel was Gao Tu,” he said dully.
“Oh, you finally figured it out, did you?”
Shen Wenlang sat up and glared. “You knew?!”
“Of course I did. I even snapped a photo of the Omega as he ran into that tiny closet of a room. Wanna see?”
Shen Wenlang grabbed at the proffered phone and stared at the grainy image. He immediately recognized that back profile and that suit. He stared daggers at Hua Yong. “Were you ever planning to tell me?!”
Hua Yong smiled and shrugged, repossessing his phone. “Eventually, when the time was appropriate.”
“Appropriate?! It’s been two weeks of searches and inquiries, and all this time you could have just told me!”
“Well, you never asked.”
“YOU!”
“Now that you know who the Omega is, what are you going to do about it?”
“I—! … I don’t know.” He slumped into his chair.
“Well, don’t fire him. You don’t want the hassle of being sued for wrongful dismissal and gender discrimination.”
“But he lied to me!”
“Well, so would I, if my boss told me almost every day that he hated Omegas.”
Shen Wenlang sat, slack-jawed and speechless.
“You know that only Omegas—well, one particular Omega—with a high compatibility to one could have triggered an unplanned rut, especially in an S-class Alpha such as yourself. I would seriously start planning out the courtship rituals you need to properly woo him.”
With that, Hua Yong sailed out of the office.
~*~*~*~
He was at his wits’ end when he felt the throbbing while handing the budget reports to Shen Wenlang. He saw Shen Wenlang glance up sharply, but when no harsh words emitted, he bowed and practically fled.
In the washroom, he was confronted once again with his personal scent. He pinched his nose in frustration. The injections were failing as well now. He’d dosed himself first thing that morning, just as an extra precaution. But it was of no use. His body was becoming immune to the effects of the suppressants.
Desperate, he called his specialist’s office and obtained a follow-up appointment in two weeks.
Meanwhile, he would need to go to the pharmacy to buy inhibitor sprays for his clothes to help contain his scent. He took mental stock of his supply of suppressants and felt a small sense of relief that even if he needed to double the dosage, he would have enough to last until he saw his specialist.
He would just have to be extra vigilant and not let Shen Wenlang notice his scent.
~*~*~*~
It took all of one evening after Hua Yong left for Shen Wenlang to come to terms with the fact that Gao Tu was an Omega. And to finally admit to himself that he was in love with the man, had been in love with him for years.
Of course, he also spent part of said evening berating himself for every insult he ever said against Omegas, recalling every utterance, recalling that doctor’s hissing “Man up!”, recalling Gao Tu’s flinches and blinking away hurt expressions whenever he spewed his vitriol. Shen Wenlang had clutched his hair in despair.
But his inner alpha had also howled at him to claim. He’s mine!
And so, he decided to start by showing that he was trying to improve by carefully guarding his tongue and refraining from making any new derogatory comments about Omegas. And finally understanding that pull he felt, that desire to have his omega in his presence, he started coming up with any excuse to call Gao Tu into his office.
His inner alpha rumbled in satisfaction whenever it noticed that alluring scent of sage.
But he didn’t seem to be making any headway. For some inexplicable reason that made his inner alpha growl in frustration, Gao Tu was doing his best to avoid being in the same room with him. The distressed sage was now becoming more and more frequent and more and more potent. Shen Wenlang was tempted on more than one occasion to pounce and hold the Omega captive, but he was always a step behind, and the flash of glasses as the door closed quickly behind Gao Tu had him gnashing his teeth.
He paced his living room, wondering how to make his intentions known without completely scaring off the object of his affection. Were flowers too cliche? If Gao Tu was too afraid to be in a room with him, he surely would refuse a meal. Was there a company meeting outside the office or upcoming event or conference that he could compel the Omega to attend with him? He rubbed his face in frustration: unfortunately, Gao Tu was in charge of his schedule, and Shen Wenlang had trusted him so completely that he had not even bothered to have IT set up a shared calendar, relying solely on Gao Tu to tell him what was on the roster for any given day, week, or month.
Fate thankfully took pity and intervened.
~*~*~*~
Two days before his scheduled appointment with his specialist, Gao Tu suffered the worst bout of food poisoning he’d ever experienced. He was so weakened the first morning that he had called in sick. Not being able to keep down anything more than warm water and some dry crackers, he awoke on the day of his appointment exhausted; his hands trembled and he had to slow his walking pace so that he wouldn’t stumble.
His specialist had taken one look at his pale, haggard face and ordered immediate bloodwork, telling him to wait for the results.
Three hours later, he was called back in. To find his world crashing about his ears.
Pregnant.
High risk. Worsen pheromone disorder. Stop all suppressants. Severe symptoms of which morning sickness was just the start. Difficult pregnancy in unmated Omega withoutthepresenceofanAlpha…
Abortion.
“No!” He almost shouted at the doctor. “Please, no. Not that. I—I can’t… please, I really want this baby…” His mind went blank and he felt a tightness in his chest. His vision darkened.
Gao Tu slowly blinked awake and found himself staring at the ceiling of the exam room.
“Do not move. Your body is very weak. If you really want this baby, then you can’t do anything to stress yourself—and it—out.”
He felt the cold press of a stethoscope against his chest, felt the cuff on his upper arm inflate and, several seconds later, heard the beep as his blood pressure reading flashed on the screen.
“Well, your vitals are normal. If you feel up to it, I’d like you to slowly sit up.”
When Gao Tu was upright again, he said, “Doctor, what do I need to do to keep this baby?”
“Stop using your suppressants. All of them. Start eating a more nutritious diet; I will refer you to a dietitian. Sleep more. Preferably change your high-stress job for a relatively stress-free one. And get your alpha to scent you regularly to help stabilize your hormones.”
Gao Tu stared in sheer panic.
“If he managed to impregnate you despite your pheromone disorder and despite not being bonded with you, then he is the best guarantee for as safe a pregnancy and delivery as you can hope for in your current state of health. You could try a combination of another Alpha’s pheromones and the available artificial ones on the market, but these will not be nearly as effective.
“I did not advise the termination of your pregnancy out of cruelty, but I need you to understand just how high risk it is. You have a much greater chance of naturally miscarrying than most, and even if your baby survived the first trimester, it still risks being born premature and having lifelong health problems. Your use of suppressants before puberty has caused your body to be underdeveloped in ways that will make carrying a child to term not only difficult but impossible to endure a natural birth; a C-section is your only option.
“You will need to be frequently monitored. I will refer you to the obstetrician who specializes in high-risk pregnancies. I will warn that she is very strict and has fired patients who do not follow her rules and who lie about doing so.
“Meanwhile, I will write a script for some standard prenatal vitamins and folic acid to help your body adjust to the growing life that will suck all the energy from you. I strongly suggest you go home and think long and hard about what you truly want to do, whether the risks would be worth it—for you and the baby—and to have a good, long talk with your alpha.”
~*~*~*~
The following Monday after a week's absence, a pacing Shen Wenlang vowed that he would kick down Gao Tu’s apartment door if he called in sick again.
There was a knock on the door, and when permission was barked, a head-bent Secretary Zhou entered carrying a tray of tea.
He was about to order her to take it away—he really should fire all of them for not even being competent enough to make tea!—when he caught the scent of the tea and realized it was perfectly brewed.
“Sh–Shen-zong, Secretary Gao asked me to bring this in for you. He–he apologizes for not doing it himself, but he’s just recovering from a severe bout of flu and doesn’t want to risk infecting you.” She bowed and scampered.
The tea helped calm him, although he still felt restless, needing to see Gao Tu.
His instincts getting the better of him, he threw open the door and shouted, “Secretary Gao! Inside! Now!”
“S–s–sorry, Shen-zong! S–s–secretary Gao is in the washroom. I–I–I’ll tell him to come see you right away once he’s out,” one of them squeaked.
Shen Wenlang huffed into his chair and waited, drumming his fingers on the armrest.
After an eternity, there was the soft knock.
Gao Tu came in wearing a mask that covered most of his face but could not hide the pallor, the dark bags under his eyes, the effort it took to stay upright. “Yes, Shen-zong?”
“Sit down before you keel over!” Shen Wenlang white-knuckled the armrests to stop himself from striding over and dragging Gao Tu to sit in his own, more comfortable chair.
Once they were at eye level, Gao Tu said, “You wanted to see me, sir?”
“Are you sure you’re well enough to work? You look like death warmed over.”
“I–I’m feeling much better. I can manage.”
Shen Wenlang glared but finally said, “Fine. But if you don’t feel well, go home. And stay there until you’ve recovered.”
“Thank you for your concern, Shen-zong. If… if that is all, I will go back and get caught up on what I’ve missed in the past week.”
“Alright.”
It was only after Gao Tu had left and his inner alpha had quieted that Shen Wenlang realized that he had not detected a hint of sage.
~*~*~*~
Gao Tu splashed water on his face and sighed. He then forced himself to do breathing exercises to calm down, praying he would not be subjected to another bout of vomiting. When he felt sufficiently pulled together, he sniffed his jacket and felt a bit more of the tension ease: he was scent-free.
He had had a long, desperate discussion with his specialist regarding the continued use of suppressants, arguing that he needed time to explain to his boss why he had lied on his job application that he was a Beta, which fell on deaf ears, and finally frantically pointing out that going cold turkey after such prolonged, high dosage use would send his body into shock, which did not. The specialist had grumbled but finally conceded the point. He was given a prescription for a patch combined with a pill that were safe for use during pregnancy and a short list of sprays that would also cause no long-term damage to the fetus. But the specialist was adamant that no injections and puffers were to be even touched if he was truly serious about keeping the baby.
The specialist also set a deadline: he had to be off all suppressants in two weeks. Otherwise, Gao Tu may as well prepare himself to miscarry.
Gao Tu sighed. He still had not come up with a way of telling Shen Wenlang the truth without the Alpha losing his temper and firing him on the spot.
He sighed again as he put his mask back on. One task at a time. First, he needed to review Shen Wenlang’s schedule to be reminded of what he needed to do to prepare for each item. Then he needed to catch up on everything that had gone on during his week of absence.
Squaring his shoulders, he exited the washroom.
~*~*~*~
Shen Wenlang was irritated by the absence of the combined scent of sage and sweetness. But he bit his tongue because at least Gao Tu wasn’t avoiding him as before. He even consented to stay behind after the weekly department heads meeting to give his thoughts on the reports that each department had submitted on last month’s achievements.
But as he continued to monitor Gao Tu’s every move, his sense of unease grew. The weakness and fatigue showed no signs of improvement. And Gao Tu barely ate or sipped two mouthfuls of anything before rushing to the washroom, returning pale and sweaty. The weight loss was so obvious that it looked like he was wearing borrowed clothes.
His late afternoon conference call had run overtime. When it was finally over and he had cleared his desk of whatever needed his attention, he exited his office to find Gao Tu still hard at work. “What the hell are you still doing here?”
Gao Tu startled and scrambled to stand. The next moment, he swayed and his eyes rolled to the back of his head.
“A-Tu!” Shen Wenlang breathed a sigh of relief when he managed to catch Gao Tu in time before he landed on the hard floor. He carried his omega into his office and laid him on the couch. He quickly loosened his tie and scowled as he removed the patch. His displeasure changed to confusion then shocked realization as the scent of sage intermingled with the soothing iris he’d unconsciously released; then the sweetness appeared (caramel), adding to the intoxicating mixture. What puzzled him was that Gao Tu’s scent had changed. It was subtle but unmistakable. Shen Wenlang pressed his nose against Gao Tu’s unencumbered scent gland.
He sat back on his heels and stared at the unconscious form on the couch. Even though it was faint, there was no other way to describe that modified scent except to use the term “milky”.
~*~*~*~
When he finally came to, Gao Tu found himself lying on the couch in Shen Wenlang’s office.
“Good, you’re finally awake. Now, is there something you need to tell me, Gao Tu?”