Chapter Text
“I’ve missed you so much.”
Law felt Penguin tense in his hold, and his friend remained rigid for a few moments before he slowly relaxed and returned the embrace.
A shudder passed through Law’s body, and he felt his eyes well with tears. He dug his fingers into the back of his friend’s soft fleece jacket, desperately holding on and burying his face into Penguin’s shoulder, despite their considerable difference in height.
Law felt Penguin’s fingers dig into the back of his jacket, too.
“I’ve missed you, too,” Penguin whispered, his voice cracking.
Another shudder racked his body, and Penguin pulled away.
“Law?”
His lip trembled as he stared down at the floor, swiftly wiping away the welling tears before they could fall.
“Hey,” he said softly, gently placing his hands on Law’s shoulders.
He winced, his left shoulder still sore from the old gunshot wound.
“Law?” The edges of his voice grew more concerned, and his grip tightened.
Ignoring the dull ache in his shoulder, Law exhaled and licked his dry lips, finally mustering the courage to lift his gaze and look his friend in the eye. He inhaled shakily and blew the breath out, his shoulders relaxing. The beginning of a soft smile dusted his face. “Yeah,” he breathed, staring into Penguin’s striking green eyes, concerned eyes that frantically searched Law’s expression. “Yeah,” he repeated, nodding, his voice still hoarse from the damage to his vocal cords.
“Are you sure? I mean—”
Much to his own surprise, Law laughed, throwing his head back and closing his eyes, but it came out in a strangled cackle. “Penguin, I’m fine,” he rasped through his grin.
I can't believe this is real.
Penguin slowly pulled his hands off Law’s shoulders and awkwardly placed them back at his sides. “What…happened to your voice?”
Law chuckled again, trying to stifle his laughter behind a closed fist. “I’m just getting over a cold,” he smiled, shaking his head.
The slow blackening of his heart—a process that had taken years—seemed to instantly reverse. Law had no idea that a feeling such as that would cause such genuine laughter, such inexplicable joy. Such...
A corner of Penguin’s mouth twitched and he folded his arms, shaking his head, but suddenly he too started laughing. They laughed until the two of them were doubled over in the middle of the coffee shop. They laughed and laughed; Law hadn't felt such stupendous, ridiculous feelings in a long time.
Is this really happening?
Penguin abruptly stopped laughing and cleared his throat, gently nudging Law, who could barely follow suit, but the annoyed frowns and glares from other patrons successfully silenced him.
The two walked up to the register and ordered coffees, ignoring the unimpressed look from the barista who had had the misfortune of witnessing their bizarre interaction. Since they both ordered simple cups of the house brew, their drinks were ready in an instant, and they quickly grabbed the cups and saucers, then they found a table sequestered in a corner of the shop.
“So…” Penguin began eagerly, reaching for a packet of sugar from the tabletop dish and flicking it a few times before tearing it open. “What…I mean…I don’t even know where to begin, I guess.” He shook his head. “I’m just…I’m so glad I got to see you before I have to leave town.”
Law took a sip of his coffee, letting the warmth spread through his body. “Same here.” He placed the cup back on the saucer. “There’s…so much that’s happened,” he said quietly, clearing his throat. He knew that he should’ve been resting his voice, but he simply didn’t care. All that mattered was this moment he’d been waiting for for so long.
Despite the smile on Penguin’s face, Law didn’t miss the unmistakable flash of concern across his friend’s eyes.
“I’m…” Law began slowly before trailing off, thinking, staring at the coffee. “I don’t know where to start, I mean…”
Penguin took a sip of his coffee, allowing Law to begin on his own terms.
“I…”
How do I tell him that I worked for years as the doctor in Dressrosa’s underground crime syndicate?
That would just scare him off, right?
Penguin gave him an innocent look.
“I don’t even know…"
"Well, how's work?"
Law blinked. I'm still on leave. "It's good, it's good."
"Last I knew was..." Penguin trailed off for a second, looking up at the ceiling. "Emergency room, right?"
"Trauma surgeon, yeah."
Penguin whistled, clearly impressed. "Nice. How do you like it?"
"It's hectic, but..." Law smiled at his coffee. "I like it. I really do like it."
"Good, I'm glad."
Law took a sip of his coffee. "What about you? Project manager...?"
I think that's what he said when we ran into each other the other week.
Penguin nodded. "Yep. Work is fine, I like it for the most part, although now I mostly just sit in meetings all day. Promotions are good, of course, but..." he rolled his eyes. "Sometimes I just want to...not manage these projects. I want to work on them. Do them, you know?"
"Yeah, that makes sense. Are you still in Water Seven?" Law asked hesitantly. That was where Penguin's job right out of college had been located.
"Yep."
"How do you like it?"
Penguin made a fist and shook it at the ceiling. "I would trade the snow drifts of the North Blue for the incessant rain any day!" he declared.
Law chuckled. "I didn't know you felt that strongly about rain."
"I'm just constantly wet!"
A few customers turned at his exclamation, shooting the two of them disgusted and unimpressed looks.
Law snorted. "Not sure that's something you want to announce."
Penguin pointed an accusatory finger at him. "You haven't grown up, have you?"
"Have you?" he retorted.
Penguin scoffed, but Law knew he was enjoying himself.
It's like nothing ever changed. It's like I never did...what I did. It's as if Penguin doesn't even remember what happened. It's...it's not something I deserve. It's not something I deserve at all. What I did to them...
Penguin tilted his head to the side. “Are you okay?”
Law looked away and closed his eyes. “I’m just…” he trailed off, his lower lip wobbling. “I’m just so…grateful to see you. After everything I did—”
His breathing hitched: whether from his damaged vocal cords or his emotions, he wasn’t sure.
“Law,” Penguin said softly, lowering his voice. “Like I said the other day at the grocery store, I forgave you."
He inhaled sharply and shook his head, his eyes burning. He couldn’t look his friend in the eye.
“I don’t know what happened, and if you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine, but…”
Law shook his head again and wiped his nose with the back of his hand.
He deserves to know. It's the least that I could do. He deserves more. An explanation is the bare minimum. I need to tell him.
But...
Penguin sighed, putting his elbows on the table and leaning forward. “Hey, I...”
He...he needs to at least know some of it. It's not fair. Not after all I did to them.
Law licked his dry lips. “I was...I was going through a lot.”
What a lame excuse.
Penguin bit his lip. "You...you don't have to tell me. We don't have to talk about that."
He shook his head. "I...you deserve to...to hear an explanation."
"It's okay."
No, he deserves something. He does. I owe him much more than an explanation. After everything I put them through. An explanation is the bare minimum. But...can I tell him? He's...he's my friend. Of course I can.
Right?
"I was...forced to."
Penguin blinked. “...What?”
Law sniffed and exhaled, finally looking him in the eye. “I was forced to…do that to you three.”
He looked confused. "Forced to...do what?"
Law cleared his throat. “Do you remember…when I ended up in the hospital? In our last semester?”
Penguin stared at Law, his gaze intense. “Yes.”
“That night…” he paused and looked up, his brows furrowed. “Did Ikkaku ever tell you what happened?”
He shook his head.
“Ikakku and I…we…we saw two people who’d been shot, and we tried to help them,” he said hoarsely. “That backfired, and the guy who shot them came after us. Ikkaku got away, but…but I didn’t.”
Penguin’s eyebrows tipped up in concern. “Oh.”
Law swallowed thickly. “The guy who shot those two…”
Can I really tell him what happened?
I...I don't know.
He's one of my best friends, of course I can.
But...
No.
I can't.
He can't know the truth about me.
Not now.
I just got one of my best friends back...I can't risk losing him again.
I can't tell him, not now, but maybe someday.
Yes, someday.
He bit down on his lip. “He…I…he wanted to go after all three of you. I told him you guys had nothing to do with this...then I told him that you guys meant nothing to me, to leave you guys alone. But then he said, ‘prove it’.”
Penguin looked even more confused. "How do you prove something like that?"
"By..." he swallowed thickly, looking away, his voice small. "By pushing you guys away."
His friend blinked, and Law could see the gears turning in his mind. “So that’s…that’s why you started…acting that way?”
Law nodded. “To make you three...hate me, I guess. It proves to him that you guys meant...nothing."
The two sat in silence for several moments. Law stared down at his coffee, hoping that it was an acceptable excuse.
You're kidding yourself. What you did to them is inexcusable.
“Wait.”
Law held his breath.
“It makes sense how he knew about Ikkaku…but how did he know about me and Shachi?”
“Um…” his heartbeat quickened. He should’ve thought through his lie more.
It’s not a lie, it's a half-truth, he told himself.
But a half-truth is a half-lie, came a smaller voice.
“I think he stalked me.”
Penguin bridled and raised a disgusted eyebrow. “That’s…creepy. Why would he do that? And what would he even stand to gain from the three of us out of your life? It all seems..." he scrunched up his face. "I don't know how else to put it, but...dramatic, I guess?"
Law shrugged and went to raise the cup, but his shaking hand caused it to rattle against the saucer, which did not go unnoticed by Penguin. He took a sip to make himself busy. “He threatened to kill you guys. I don’t know why…it may have been out of revenge for Ikkaku and I meddling in his business, but I also think he was just…”
“Sadistic?” Penguin supplied.
Nodding, he lowered the cup but didn’t place it on the saucer. He didn’t want any more of his nerves to show. “Yeah. Sadistic is the word. In the moment I didn’t know what else to do other than follow through with his demands.”
His friend looked away. “You could’ve told us,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
“I know,” he said softly, letting out a resigned sigh. “There’s…a lot of things I should’ve done back then. And things I shouldn’t have done. I…I wasn’t thinking clearly back then…I was…terrified.”
Penguin finally turned back to him with glistening eyes. “I…” he began, his voice barely above a whisper. “We were terrified for you, too. We could’ve helped you—”
“No.”
“Law, please—”
“Penguin, no, I—”
“Listen, we—”
“I can’t, I—”
“Please just listen!”
Law snapped his mouth shut and stared into his friend’s red eyes, then he noticed the wobbling lip.
“Sorry,” Penguin whispered, looking away again. “Sorry. I…I…just…I wish you would’ve told us. We could’ve worked it out, we would have worked it out. We…didn’t understand what was going on.”
"But that's exactly why I couldn't tell you guys," Law pleaded. "You would've done everything you could to fix it, or-or do something about it, and that would've resulted in you three getting killed. It needed to...be real."
Law thought he saw betrayal in his friend's eyes.
“I know, it doesn't make sense. I'm sorry,” he admitted quietly. “I wasn't thinking straight, I was so desperate back then. I’m truly, truly sorry. I…I don’t know how I can ever make it up to you guys, but…if possible, I’d like to…”
Penguin’s eyes flickered up, his expression softening.
He swallowed. “I’d like to…stay in touch…if that’s alright with you.”
A small smile graced Penguin’s watery expression. “Yeah,” he replied, sighing. “I’d like that. I’d like that a lot.”
Law smiled, his chest swelling with…with something he hadn’t felt in a long time.
Love.
I remember now.
Trudging through the freshly fallen snow, Law led Penguin back to his apartment building, and the two kicked the snow off their boots and climbed up the stairs.
“Nice building,” Penguin muttered as they approached Law’s door. He fumbled for his keys, and as he unlocked and pushed on his door, he heard the door behind him open.
He froze for a second, his heart rate skyrocketing. Out of his periphery, he saw Penguin turn to face the direction of the sound. Law exhaled quickly and turned around, but before he could react, he was tackled in an embrace that sent him and the culprit stumbling backwards into his apartment.
“I was so worried,” Robin whispered in his ear.
Law smiled into her shoulder and hugged her back. “I’m sorry,” he murmured.
She tightened her grip on him, and he winced again at the aggravation of his shoulder. He hoped that he was hiding his reactions well enough. Both Penguin and Robin had inadvertently hurt him.
Robin gently pulled back and searched his expression with her big, beautiful, blue eyes.
“You’ve got scratches on your face.”
From the branches in the woods.
Before he could say anything, he heard Penguin's heeled boots in his entryway. He observed the interaction, but then—knowing that Robin couldn’t see his expression—he gave Law a suggestive look, his eyebrows raised and a smirk on his face.
Law felt himself go red.
“Oh, sorry,” Law said quickly, clearing his throat since it came out raspy. “Robin, this is Penguin. Penguin, this is Robin.”
Robin’s eyes flashed with concern, but she turned and extended her hand, and Penguin accepted the handshake.
“Pleasure to meet you,” Robin said warmly.
“Pleasure’s all mine.”
Robin gave him an odd look. “Wait, I’ve seen…”
Robin turned to Law. No, she turned to look past Law, further into his apartment. She walked past him, much to his confusion, before she stopped in front of his fireplace and picked something up off his mantle.
Law felt the color drain from his face as Penguin walked over, but he joined them nonetheless.
Robin showed them the picture frame, the one with the shattered, jagged glass.
Behind the shards was the picture of Law, Penguin, Shachi, and Ikkaku from their final year in college; that frame had fallen over and broke when Law had obnoxiously slammed his apartment door shut the other week.
“That’s you, isn’t it?” Robin asked, pointing at Penguin in the photo.
With a neutral expression, Penguin slowly reached for the photo, and she handed it to him.
Penguin stared down at it, tracing the remaining shard.
Law remained silent, unease creeping into his mind.
Robin didn't say a word, either.
Penguin continued to stare, seeming reverent, until—
“I don’t really remember much from this night. Mostly just dragging Shachi back to the house."
The unease quickly disappeared, and Law chuckled. While still gazing at the photo, Penguin cracked a smile.
Law turned to Robin. “Thank you for taking care of Kikoku while I was gone.”
She nodded. “Of course. She’s a hider, though.”
Law blinked, confused.
“I didn’t see her once while I was here. Have you seen her?”
“Yeah, I saw her this morning.” He glanced around his apartment.
She looked around as well. “She must be hiding again.”
“Who’s Kikoku?” Penguin asked, still not taking his eyes off the photo.
“My cat.”
He looked up. “You have a cat?”
Law nodded.
He hummed. “Huh. Nice.”
“Law?” Robin asked, concern evident in her voice. “What happened to your voice?”
His eyes quickly flicked over to Penguin, then back to her. “I’m getting over a cold.”
She blinked. “Oh, okay. I hope you feel better.”
His stomach plummeted to the floor. She doesn’t believe me. “I—”
“Oh, shit,” Penguin muttered, eyes widening at his watch before he quickly handed the picture to Law. “I have to get going; I'm meeting up with my sister again today. But before I forget,” he said, walking towards the door and pointing back at Law. “Galley La is opening a satellite office in Dressrosa soon.”
Law’s eyes widened.
Penguin winked. “And my boss also knows how much I hate the rain.”
He flashed a smile, waved, then left, closing the door behind him and plunging Law and Robin into a tense silence.
“Thanks again for taking care of Kikoku,” he said awkwardly, placing the frame back on the mantle to avoid her gaze.
“Are you okay?”
He gave a start, then turned back around to face her.
She waited expectantly, her expression etched with worry.
While his mind scrambled for an excuse, he opened his mouth, hoping that words would somehow come out.
They didn’t.
“Law, are you in danger?”
No, not anymore.
He shook his head. “No, I’m not, I’ve just…been going through it lately.”
She sighed. “Law, I…”
Oh no.
“I care about you.”
Wait.
“I care about you a lot.”
I care about you, too.
“But…”
No, Robin, I’m sorry, let me make it up to you. I'll explain everything.
Someday, I will.
She sighed again and set her eyes onto his. “I know you’ve been lying to me," she said quietly.
He opened his mouth to defend himself, but again, no words came out.
She's right.
"About what? I’m not sure. You don’t have to tell me what’s going on, you really don’t, but…please don’t lie.”
He had no idea what she meant.
“You can tell me that you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine, that’s okay. I promise. But…please don’t tell me something that’s not true. You’ve got scratches all over your face, you look like you haven’t slept in days, and suddenly your voice sounds…” she shook her head sadly. “That’s not a voice that’s recovering from a cold.” Her eyes flickered down to his neck.
The handprint bruise was barely there, but Robin had known about it way back when—she had even seen it when it was still fresh. While his damaged voice and the bruise were from two different events, her message was clear.
And her concerns were valid.
In an attempt at comfort, Robin placed her hand on his shoulder.
His left shoulder.
He winced, reaching up to clutch the old wound, and Robin frantically lifted her hand away.
“Law, I’m sorry, I—”
“It’s alright,” he rasped, his shoulder throbbing. “I…”
I have to stop lying to people.
“I was on a hunting trip.”
She blinked, and her mouth parted. “Oh…I thought you said you were gone on a work…thing?”
I have to stop lying to people.
But I can't.
“My coworkers go every year, and this was the first time I went with them.”
“Oh.”
That part is true.
“But your other injuries…”
He shook his head. “Those were from some of the violent patients I had recently, I thought I had…”
“Oh…that’s right...you did mention that...”
“I’m sorry.”
But I can’t tell you what I’m sorry for.
She bit her lip. “I’m…worried about you."
“I’m sorry,” he repeated. “I haven’t been honest with you. I’ve been…running away all the time, acting…weird…”
“Weirder than normal,” she said matter-of-factly, a tiny, placatory laugh accompanying it.
That caught him off guard. Is that her...accepting my apology?
He searched her face, pausing before replying. “You think I’m weird?” he asked, a challenge in his voice as he narrowed his eyes at her.
She raised an eyebrow in response, then sighed. “You’re a bit of a mystery, I’d say.”
Confused at her sudden shift in demeanor, his eyes quickly scanned down to her boots then back up into her eyes. “Oh, really?”
“A puzzle,” she shrugged, then shook her head, tsking, hiding a smile. “I feel as though I’m missing pieces.”
“Well, that’s not fair.”
“Exactly.”
He narrowed his eyes even further and opened his mouth, his tongue subconsciously running along his top molars. "Point taken."
“Perhaps if I had all the pieces, I could solve…” she held her hand up and gestured up and down to his whole self. “This…”
He folded his arms across his chest. “And you love solving puzzles.”
She mirrored his action and raised her chin into the air. “I do.”
Law took a step forward.
She didn’t move.
“Is that something you want?” he asked. “All the pieces?”
“Perhaps in due time.”
Any sort of suave behaviors he’d mustered out of nowhere suddenly faltered. She closed the gap between them and laid a soft kiss on his cheek, her lips brushing gently over one of the scratches.
When she stepped back, she smiled at him. It was a warm—yet sad—smile.
“In due time,” she repeated softly, placing her hand on his cheek.
He leaned into her warm touch, but just as quickly as it had arrived, it was gone. She pulled away, giving him another sad smile before turning around and departing, leaving Law to think about how the last thing he'd seen were her eyes glistening with tears, tears that were no one's fault but his.