Archive of Our Own

people used to tell me that time heals everything, but no matter how much time passes, i just can't look at your side of the bed without feeling like the damn world is crushing me, just like the first time i arrived at our apartment and was overwhelmed by an unbearable darkness.

i let out everything i had been holding in that day as i fell to the floor, the same day my whole life went downhill.

the day my heart would be cruelly buried alongside the love of my life.

pakkun. i know damn well this is affecting him as much as it is doing to me, that the person you adore the most, that loved and cared for you more than anyone, no longer calls to cuddle every morning with so much affection, it would sadden anyone to death.

because is killing me, that is for sure.

everything has become a routine, i get out of bed, take a shower because i know he would be shouting at the top of his lungs from his comfy house on that blue blanket covered with clouds if i didn't, then i feed pakkun and pet him for a long time, i sink into the couch and disconnect from myself for the rest of the day, my eyes go from one side to the other, looking at the photos on every wall, seeing that gentle smile in every single one.

the memories, the unforgettable moments, those days that marked our lives the most, were just there.

without a warning, thick tears fall down my cheeks while i bury my face in my hands. no one hears me, no one question me and no one hugs me except for the complete silence that surrounds me.

if i had taken your hand in that moment, if i had gently hugged you against my chest, leaving a trail of kisses across your face until the tears disappeared, if i had look into those beautiful eyes while i whisper how much i love you, how much you mean to me, and that everything would be alright.

if i only had been with you that night...

would you be by my side watching the stars right now? would i be pointing out each constellation to you with pride only to end up wrong? would i be listening to your soft laugh while i look at you with so much love?

obito thanks kakashi unconditionally because he was, is, and will be his great love, his salvation in the most difficult moments, the person who helped him not fall again into a dark and deep abyss. he was that light at the end of the tunnel, which he had never believed he could reach, but that appeared before him at the least expected moment.

if only life hadn't robbed them of all happiness overnight, they could have continued being the lovers from the 7th floor who danced early in the morning while the sweetest breakfast awaited them on the small table. hands gently on each others waists, foreheads together and gentle looks of pure adoration. the birds outside the window singing for them.

for now, he will reunite with his beloved and they will dance in the beautiful autumn sea, following the waves but above all, following the one he has loved most in this life, and surely in the ones to come.

he was not afraid; with the slightest hint of fear, he would remind himself a thousand times of the fear his kashi felt before finally ascending to the peace that his mind was asking for.

who knows, they would explore the sea without worries and for the rest of eternity, they would dance again, on a path of clouds with bare feet, just the two of them, just their unconditional love.

as he falls into the arms of the vast sea, he wonders if the grandma who visited them so often to bring them delicious meals is doing good right now; he only hopes that she and pakkun have a life full of happiness in each others company.

obito finally smiles as he closes his eyes, just as he is being embraced by the blue mantle that surrounds him.