Chapter Text
Well, this was a predicament. Lucio has volunteered--more like forced--into helping Jamison how to be a normal citizen again. Everyone in the HQ refused to work with him or even if they did, they stopped after a few days of working with him. It was that difficult. But luckily, Lucio was a patient man with a little time on his hands now that his touring was over and he was partly working for Overwatch. He thought it would be fun. Oh boy was he wrong.
" Oi, mate. What'dya mean I can't put my feet on the table? "
This was the first day and Lucio was already stressed out to the point where he was ready to call it a day and take a break. He's been at this for only mere hours. Telling a Junker what everything was again like a child was very difficult. At first, he thought it was fun to show Jamison around his house and telling him what is what and how he should do it. Just watching his amazement at everything was amusing to watch but when it came to doing them out of his original schedule, it was not easy.
" Jamie...You can't just do that, dude. Maybe when you are by yourself, then you can do that. But we are pretending to be in a public place where people are watching--"
" Why should I care that people are watchin', eh? What if I like the attention on me? "
Lucio inhaled through his teeth a bit before continuing with his explanation. " Well in this day and age, people care about what you look like and how you dress and stuff. People judge you for how you present yourself. And not gonna lie, when people see....'that', they don't approach you at all. " He was trying to be as nice as possible and not seem like he's trying to force him but it got his legs off the table with a groan to move on with this lesson. Lucio flashed a smile.
" Now...uh...Now that we have the appearance down packed-- " he spoke softly, gazing at the attire he put on Junkrat (t'was a simple t-shirt and blue jeaned shorts). " --we can get started on the etiquette part. It's not difficult one you got it down packed. " He got up for a second and looked around for random items that he could find. He then placed some pencils and cut up pieces of paper on his plate and did the same for his own. There was NO WAY that he was going to place actual food on his plate. He don't know what he would do with it. " Pretend this is food. "
" But, mate. This is some paper n' pencils. "
" I know just....pretend it's food, okay? "
A nod came from the junker.
" Good! Now pretend this is not what you ordered, okay? And you get the waiter's attention. What do you do to nicely say that the order was wrong? "
Jamison then scrunched his face and held up the plate to the imaginary waiter and said " 'cuse me, cunt? This is the wrong order and if you don't fix it, I will shove this bomb RIGHT UP YOUR ASS! " and down went the plate and onto the floor, shattering into pieces. Lucio was not even surprised but he was still in shock that one of his plates were broken. He knew he should have used paper plates.
" ....That's...not how you get someone's attention. "
" I don't see why not. The bastard got me order wrong so I told 'em what for. "
" Jamie...Here, people don't do that. We get their attention. QUIETLY. and we say 'excuse me, sir or madam, but this dish is not what we ordered.' is that hard? " Lucio was really being patient. He understands that he never had to do anything like this but it was frustrating him and he was starting to see why people were quitting on him so quickly. He sighed and stood up to get a broom and dust pan to sweep up the disaster that he made. But this was just the beginning.
Lucio literally spent the entire day working with him on this. Dealing with his attitude and rude manners and refusal to get it right the first time. The Brazilian felt like it was going in one ear and out the other. Slowly but surely it was stressing him out. It was causing his brain to pound. It felt like a mine workers were picking away at his head to find coal and they were striking all the good spots. His hands were on his face by the end of the day and he was literally leaning against his counter with some headache pill bottles in his hand.
" Woo wee! That was fun. Ya taught me a lot today. " Jamison said happily like he didn't do anything wrong. Lucio didn't even know if he was being sarcastic or not but he nodded in response. " So uh....I'll see ya tomorrow? " Lucio didn't respond. He was holding his head, trying to get the pounding to stop.
" I'll uh...see myself out. "
Click.
At the sound of the door closing, he faceplanted his head right into the counter which was a bad idea cause it made his headache far worse. He had to let his frustration out somehow. He pressed buttons on his watch to display a screen and pressed a few buttons on the holographic screen to reveal a number calling.
" Yeoboseyo? " It was D.va. Or Hana as Lucio calls her. They were fans of each others work so of course they were close and had each others numbers. " What's up, Lu? How did the uh...lessons go? " Hana on the screen tilts her head and looks Lucio over a bit. " From what I can tell, you barely made it. Haha! " He knew that she was poking fun and didn't mind it.
" Yeah it was...It was rough. I can see why people quit but...Damn...It's not his fault that he's like this. He was in Australia and you know how that part is right now. "
" Yeah...It's a waste land there. "
He spoke to Hana a bit about his situation and how he was going to handle it tomorrow. They even spoke about her latest stream and how that was going. Even Lucio laughed a bit at the stories she told of it. An hour passed after all of the talking and he realized what time it was. " Woah okay, Hana. I gotta head to sleep. It's late and I would LOVE to stay up and talk about how awesome you are but I gotta snooze, kay? "
Hana giggled on the other side of the screen. " Don't tease like that, Lu. Hey! Good luck tomorrow. You are going to need it! "
And with a click of the screen, he closed up his call.
He sure was going to need it tomorrow.