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The swirling ivory and greens that coat the canvas pull Bucky in. Steve always has that sort of effect, even in his paintings. Bucky tilts his head, leaning down slightly to get a better look, gaze raking up and down the half full canvas—a piece he’s seen Steve struggle and mull over.
If he closes his eyes, he can smell metal and ozone. He sees red and gold armor, the distinct look of hurt and betrayal in Tony’s eyes, a look that’s all too familiar. But that’s over, a little voice in his head tells himself. Tony is still reluctant, keeping his distance whenever he and Steve visit the compound but it’s enough.
The Avengers aren’t exactly broken up, but they aren’t exactly keen on congregating again anytime soon if what Bucky senses is correct. He remembers the way Steve sank to his knees in front of him, calloused hands gently taking his fingers and pressing his lips to each one. Bucky remembers his breath hitching, face flushing at the sight of Steve so desperate.
His eyes are like the sky and if Bucky could, he’d let himself fall in reverse.
“Stay with me.”
It’s three words—three words that pierced Bucky’s heart. He just couldn’t resist, not when Steve, an alpha, was literally on his knees, begging.
Bucky still isn’t used to the attention. It still feels a little scandalous—an alpha and beta living together. Not that Bucky has any qualms about it. No, but attention from another beta and from an alpha are two very distinct things.
Nonetheless, Bucky manages. The haze of domesticity feels weird, like he’s walking with two left feet. But Steve is there to level him.
He yelps, feeling a hand press itself to the small of his back, quickly turning and coming face to face with Steve. God, he’s even more handsome up close. He was gorgeous before the serum and is after. His scent wraps around him like a blanket and Bucky wants to fall into his arms.
“How are you?” Steve’s voice is gentle, his voice carrying that familiar cadence. Bucky’s knees are weak. He manages a half smile. “I’m okay. You gonna finish this anytime soon?” he gestures over to the half finished painting.
Steve removes his hand and Bucky nearly chases after it. Steve looks conflicted, settling his hands on his hips with a sigh, glancing over to the canvas, unsure.
“Good question.” he chuckles. “Not sure where to go with it. It’ll come to me. In the meantime,” Steve puts something soft and slightly fuzzy in his hand and Bucky looks down—a peach.
And then a whole basket full comes into view.
“I guess I went overboard,” he chuckles. “I know how much you like fruit, have it.”
Bucky eyes the basket, carefully taking it, breath hitching at the feel of their fingers brushing. “Thank you…”
That’s where it starts.
It’s little things. Every week after the peaches, Steve cooks—or attempts to—dinner for them both, pouring them both sweet wine. Bucky likes sweet things, he’s realized. And, Steve seems to have caught on to that too.
Then it’s bouquets every other week—hydrangeas, baby’s breath, lilies. Bucky is running out of vases at this point, but he never tires of it, especially when Steve beams at him every time his arms are full.
Candles, soft sweaters, sweets—all for him.
Bucky is overwhelmed. It’s almost as if Steve is courting him but, no, that’s a silly thought. He’s not an omega.
He doesn’t snoop on purpose, but it’s hard to sleep and listening to Steve murmur to someone over the phone through the walls settles his mind.
He overhears him one night. It’s muffled, but he can barely make it out if he really listens closely.
“I can’t risk it.”
A sigh.
“It’s too dangerous—ever since the serum, my ruts may be further apart but…”
Silence.
“No.”
And then, “I understand.”
Bucky eyes Steve after that, his words echoing in his mind. He feels awful, like a creep, a peeping tom… but he’s always been a soldier, even if it cost him. And that thought sours his mood.
Steve sits down with him on the couch, Bucky curled up on the edge, knees pulled to his chest.
“You know. Don’t you?”
Bucky goes rigid, eyes widening as his head snaps to Steve who looks unfazed.
“Steve—shit. I’m sorry, I-“
Steve smiles. “It’s alright Buck. It’s time we talk about it.”
Bucky inches ever so closer, but not enough for it to be noticeable.
Steve sighs. “Ever since I was administered the serum, my ruts… they’re further spaced. But I guess at a cost. It’s like I’m feral and god it hurts. It’s violent—ugly.” he looks over to Bucky. “I never want to hurt you. You’ve been through enough. If I’m gone or holed up in my room, you’ll know why.”
Bucky swallows, hard, and nods. Steve smiles.
Bucky can’t resist the thought, hand pressed over his mouth as his fingers massage his clit, images of Steve knotting him behind his eyelids—a fantasy just out of reach.
*
They’re called to the compound a month later. Tony still eyes him carefully and Bucky lets himself bathe in the shame of it all.
He can’t listen or pay attention to the mission debrief.
Steve’s warning plays out in his mind like a mantra and he can tell the day draws closer.
Steve is anxious, unable to state still. He’s ruthless, even more so, as the missions progress, keeping himself from bearing his teeth at Fury as the man scolds him.
And, for the first time in his life, Bucky is scared. He’s terrified.
Of Steve.
*
They’re holed up in the compound and Bucky can’t take his ear off of the wall, hearing Steve’s muffled groans and growls. His legs tremble and his breathing is heavy.
He frowns. Letting his feelings get in the way of his rationale isn’t ideal.
But how can he cope? How can he cope when he’s been pining for so, so long? Over an alpha of all people? He feels the prickle of frustrated tears brim his eyes.
Bucky leaves his bed, socked feet padding against the marble floors. It’s eerie; the low hum of the compound is maddening and it's too dark. He stumbles into the kitchen, filling a glass with water when he hears it.
Footsteps.
He sets his glass down on the counter and looks over. He should be alert, normally he’d already be in position. But…
“Bucky?”
Bucky blinks.
“Stevie?” he whispers.
He hears Steve’s heavy pants, the labored breaths. “Come over here for a second, yeah?”
Bucky trembles.
“Steve,” he says firmly, his voice wavering. “Go back to your room.”
Silence.
“Steve-“
A low growl.
Slowly, Bucky walks over to Steve, seeing honeyed locks shine in the muted moonlight. His eyes are dilated, fists clenched, veins bulging slightly.
His scent makes him dizzy.
Alarm bells ring in Bucky’s head.
Steve leans down to his ear.
“Run.”
Bucky immediately books it, heart jackhammering in his chest. He doesn’t know the compound well enough to know where he’s going. He makes a left, a right, another right.
Fuck.
It’s dark—it’s so dark. He has to wake Tony, wake the others—
But the sickly sweet and syrupy feeling of arousal pools in his belly. Something sinister nips at his mind.
He doesn’t notice the way hands reach out and grab him and Bucky is screaming, squirming in his grasp.
He squeezes his eyes shut—until he feels Steve press his nose into his neck and inhale.
He can’t help the mewl that escapes him.
“Fuck- Forgive me Bucky,” Steve groans.
Bucky shakes his head. No, no, he wants this.
“Take,” he swallows. “Take what you need.”
The kiss he’s pulled into has his eyes rolling back into his skull as his knees finally buckle underneath him and Steve catches him. Its teeth and lips and they clash and mend and Bucky whines and gasps for air, grabbing at Steve’s t-shirt desperately.
Bucky bares his neck like he’s an omega, feeling Steve graze the sensitive skin with his canines, licking and sucking bruises that start to bloom.
Bucky trembles like a leaf in a hurricane. It’s all he’s wanted.
He gasps at the feel of Steve pushing his hand down his sweatpants, cupping at the mound of his pussy through his boxers, growling at feeling how soaked he is.
“Gonna spear you open, impale you on my cock. God, you’re drippin’ for it…” Bucky shudders at the Brooklyn drawl that slips out.
Bucky hides his face in Steve’s chest as thick fingers rub between the lips of his pussy. God he’s so wet.
He yelps as he’s suddenly picked up and carried back to Steve’s room and practically thrown on to the bed.
Bucky struggles to hold himself upright, shimming out of his pants and boxers, feeling his pussy leak, slick dripping down his thighs.
Steve kisses him again and is quick to plunge two fingers inside his pussy. Bucky throws his head back against the sheets. It’s rough, it burns so good the way Steve roughly fingers his cunt, the obscene squelch in his ears.
He covers his mouth, arching off the bed as he cums just on Steve’s fingers, crying out as he lets a third dive in through his orgasm.
“Fuck—fuck! Can’t wait any longer…. i need…” Steve breathes heavily as he steps out of his pants and briefs, pulling out his heavy cock, knot throbbing at the base.
Bucky’s eyes are glossy as he spreads his legs further, pussy clenching and throbbing around empty space. His eyes cross at the feel of Steve’s thick cock spearing him open.
It feels- it feels-
Bucky wails, squirting around Steve’s cock, tears falling from his eyes.
Steve presses their foreheads together as he sinks in further, his balls against his ass.
It feels like cock is in his lungs. Oh god.
The first thrust is devastating and Bucky is jostled against the bed, hair spread out against the sheets as he’s fucked mercilessly.
Steve growls, hips snapping quickly against his pelvis.
“So perfect for me. You were made for me, made to take my cock. Fuck. I love you, Bucky Barnes.”
Bucky feels the tears flow more freely at the words, toes curling.
He feels his knot catch at his rim and Bucky is gone, ruined, as he cums again at the feeling. He goes limp as Steve thrusts into him like he’s little more than a fleshlight.
Steve cums with a groan, pumping him full.
*
Bucky wakes to hurried kisses being pressed against his neck and he sits up quickly, wide-eyed. Steve looks shocked and worried, pulling him into the sweetest kiss. “Oh god… I’m sorry Buck. Shit, I could’ve hurt you-“
Bucky stares at him.
“Did you mean it?”
“What?”
“You love me?”
Steve looks at him incredulously.
“Of course I love you. I always have. I wish… I could’ve told you under different circumstances.”
Bucky falls into his arms.
The tears flow more freely now.