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Emily is yanked from peaceful sleep into sudden wakefulness by a weight launching itself onto the middle of the bed.
Her heart shoots up into her throat, beating frantically with the sudden rush of adrenaline. What’s happening? Why—
A familiar squealing cuts through the air.
“Emily!” Henry flops atop her body in a bout of giggles, forcing all breath out of her lungs. The thick down duvet does little to protect Emily from the attack. “Emily! You’re still here! Wake up!”
“Henry?”
Emily squints though the darkness until she can make out the contours of his face. Stiffness seeps out of her limbs and her arm escapes from the covers to steady Henry in his shenanigans when he crawls forward and threatens to topple over. Unsurprisingly, Emily’s body doesn’t offer a steady surface. His knee digs into her stomach, and she winces.
Henry pays it no mind and presses his face close to hers to double-check her eyes are open. His hair sticks up at all angles in a static mess, a golden glow haloing his head in the sliver of light that falls in through the open bedroom door. “You’re awake!”
“I am now,” Emily mumbles, though the temptation to close her eyes and fall back asleep is strong. Her brows furrow. “Why am I awake?”
She isn’t unfamiliar with early wake-up times when she stays over at JJ’s place, but this feels like a new record. With the way sleep lingers heavily at the edges of her mind, she can’t have been asleep for more than a handful of hours.
“Emily!”
“Henry,” she echoes with significantly less energy.
“It’s Christmas!”
The words take a second to compute.
“Oh,” Emily finally breathes. Christmas.
The early wake-up call suddenly makes sense, as does Henry’s brimming excitement. The little dude has been carefully counting down to this day for the past month.
“We have to go see our tree!” Henry is done whispering, back to talking at his normal volume, unable to contain himself. “Come, get out of bed!”
The sheets rustle, and the mattress dips as a body rolls closer to Emily.
“Can you find a sweater and socks to put on?” JJ’s low, sleep-laden voice drifts towards Emily. “Mommy and Emily need a minute to wake up, but I promise we’ll get up, okay?”
Henry protests, but does as he is told, crawling off Emily to get back down to the ground and runs off to his bedroom.
Emily exhales heavily and turns to her side, curling into the comfortable warmth of the covers. Even though she has been excited for today to arrive, she doesn’t even want to think about getting out of bed yet.
“You signed up for this,” JJ sings in Emily’s ear, slotting her body to Emily’s back. Their legs tangle together.
Emily groans, sinking into JJ’s touch. “I know.”
“You could’ve spent Christmas morning all alone in your apartment like last year,” JJ continues. She presses a kiss between Emily’s shoulder blades, sending shivers down Emily’s spine. “Could’ve slept in, read a book, watched a movie…”
Emily knows JJ is teasing, but she still shakes her head. Despite her grumbling and tiredness, she is right where she wants to be. These days her apartment is… too quiet. Empty and dark, even though Henry had made sure she got a Christmas tree for her own place this year.
It just isn’t the same, now that she knows what it feels like to share her space with people she loves.
“No?” JJ asks lightly.
“I’d rather be here with you guys,” Emily confirms. With a heavy sigh, she rolls onto her back, dislodging from JJ’s embrace. She rubs at her eyes. “God, it just feels like it’s so early. What time is it?”
JJ pushes herself into a half-sitting position, turning to squint at her alarm clock. “Five-thirty.”
The strangled sound that escapes Emily is a mixture of laughter and despair. “Seriously?”
JJ hums in tired amusement. “The joys of an excited five-year-old.”
“But we got home so late, yesterday.”
Emily had carried a half-asleep Henry from the car; he has grown so much this past year her arms were straining under his weight. Christmas Eve dinner at David Rossi’s house was a festive delight unlike any other Emily has experienced, but they had all been exhausted by the end of it.
“And I’m sure we’ll all crash before lunch,” JJ says. “Good thing we decided to take a page from your book and watch a movie this afternoon, instead of a more involved activity.” She draws a finger along Emily’s collarbone, tracing the figures on the matching Christmas pyjamas JJ had gotten the three of them this year.
The touch is soothing, almost hypnotizing, and Emily’s eyes soon threaten to fall shut again.
“Careful,” JJ mumbles. “Henry won’t be pleased if he’ll have to wake you up again.”
Emily snorts, but forces herself to stay awake, staring up at the ceiling in the dim bedroom. This early, it’ll be hours before the sun is up. Off in the distance, she hears the creak of Henry’s closet door and she pictures him inspecting the sweaters stacked on the shelves at his height.
“Well, at least it’s an improvement on last year,” she says. “Wasn’t it five AM back then?”
“Something like that.” JJ yawns, stretching her arms above her head. Emily shamelessly stares as her shirt rides up and reveals a sliver of defined abs. JJ’s eyes glaze over as she disappears in thought, then she blinks and huffs out a laugh. “If this trend continues, I think we can sleep in on Christmas morning by the time Henry is a teenager.”
Emily grows warm at the thought. A swell of emotion rises in her chest, which she swallows down. “You think?”
“A person can hope,” JJ says. “But for now and the foreseeable future, we’re stuck with a very early Christmas morning.”
A door slams shut, little footsteps thundering down the hallway, growing louder until Henry pushes inside the bedroom. He’s wearing fuzzy socks now and has found a patterned Christmas jumper Emily thinks might be on backwards. He takes one look at them, still (mostly) under the covers and groans, shoulders drooping. “Mommy! Emily! Are you still not ready?”
“A little more patience, Henry,” JJ gently admonishes him, though her words lack heat. They both know this holiday brings along big emotions that are sometimes hard to manage for his small body.
Henry’s shoulders rise to his ears, but he sighs in acknowledgement. Figuring that if they don’t speed up their process, he might need to give a hand, he helpfully brings them their slippers with a hopeful look.
A fond smile tugs at Emily’s lips as she rubs the remaining sleep from her eyes. Pushing past her desire to disappear into the inviting depths of the bed, she pulls a deep breath into her lungs and throws the covers off. Goosebumps erupt across her skin at the change in temperature and she is quick to slip into her slippers and shuffle to the closet.
More than half of her own wardrobe has found its way in here throughout the past few months, but today she steals a sweater of JJ’s to wear atop her pyjamas, pulling the sleeves down over her hands.
A hand brushes her back before sneaking past her to grab a sweater too.
“That looks good on you,” JJ murmurs near her ear.
Emily bites her lips to contain her smile as JJ steps back, slipping the sweater over her head.
“Are you ready now?”
They turn to find Henry waiting in the doorway. If they stretch this out much longer, Emily wouldn’t be surprised if he’ll plant his hands on his hips and start tapping his foot.
JJ pulls her hair free from the sweater’s collar and nods. “We’re ready.”
Henry lights up and bounds down the hallway, Emily and JJ following close behind. They gather at the living room door. Henry looks at them, then at the doorknob with a mixture of nerves and anticipation.
“Can I…?”
“Go ahead,” JJ encourages.
Henry’s excitement is infectious, enhancing the already festive atmosphere. Joyful anticipation visibly rises in JJ as Henry opens the door and heads inside. It’s a good look on her. Emily falls in step with her, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close as Henry runs to the tree with an excited gasp.
“What do you think, Hen?” JJ asks softly.
He turns around with sparkling eyes. “There are so many gifts!”
They all take a minute to admire the beautifully wrapped parcels piled underneath the tree. Many of them are from the BAU family, who had taken the opportunity of a Christmas Eve gathering to exchange parcels to put under their trees. Others are from Henry’s school friends, as well as from both JJ and Emily, but prominently at the centre sits a gift wrapped in shiny red paper and a velvet bow that catches Henry’s interest.
Realisation hits and he gasps, twisting around to find the plate and glass he had left for Santa, late last night. He inspects the crumbs that are left of the cookies they had baked themselves. “Santa came!”
“He did,” Emily says.
There is something so special, about experiencing this holiday through the eyes of a child. She glances at JJ and discovers the fond joy reflected in every one of her gentle features. If her eyes are a little glassy, well, Emily won’t comment. In a swell of affection, she kisses JJ’s cheek and leans her head against hers. JJ exhales, slipping a hand under Emily’s sweater to rest on her side.
It doesn’t take long for Henry to lose interest in Santa’s evidence, his gaze tracking back to the shiny gift left under the tree amidst the gifts from family and friends. He looks back at Emily and JJ. “Can I open it?”
“Go on,” JJ says with a nod. “One present, then we’ll make breakfast before unwrapping the rest.” She and Emily relocate to the couch for the perfect view.
Henry sits on his knees in front of the tree and pulls the gift close, tearing into the wrapping paper. The odd shape finally makes sense once the shiny paper is gone, revealing a soccer ball Henry has been wanting for months, ever since he joined his school’s soccer club after summer. Anticipation is taken over by pure joy as he admires his gift, scrambling to his feet to run to the couch to show JJ and Emily.
“Santa remembered!” Henry says excitedly.
JJ smiles and shares a look with Emily. It would have been hard for Santa to forget, with Henry’s many letters, drawings and the verbal confirmation to Mall Santa halfway through the month. “He did.”
Henry pulls at the cardboard keeping the soccer ball in place, frustration setting in when it doesn’t budge. After a long few seconds, he pushes it into Emily’s hands with a questioning look, his blue adorable puppy-eyes conveying a wordless ‘please?’ she could never say no to.
Inspecting the packaging, she spots the tape holding the cardboard together and picks at the edge until it peels off. “Here you go,” she says, holding out the freed soccer ball for Henry to snatch up.
“Thank you!” Henry holds it to his chest and points out the different patterns running along the curve. Distraction comes quickly, in the form of the ball dropping from his arms and rolling back towards the Christmas tree. Henry hurries after it, quick to catch it and try out some of the tricks he’s learned during training.
Emily and JJ keep an eye on his shenanigans. With how this gift has Henry zooming around the living room, ball bumping into furniture and remaining gifts alike, they’ll probably need to add a ‘no playing soccer inside’ rule, but that will be a problem for another day. Rules are a little different, on Christmas Day.
“I don’t think we’ll even need to open any other gifts,” Emily jokes. She curls her legs under her body, nudging a knee against JJ’s thigh. “This one is enough of a hit. Quitting on a high, right?”
JJ laughs. “I think Henry might disagree with you.” Even with his clear fascination of his gift from Santa, his gaze still occasionally tracks to the pile under the tree.
And despite her joke, Emily can’t wait to see what he thinks of the gifts she got him.
JJ inches closer and leans in. “Besides,” she murmurs lowly, Emily’s breath hitching. “If we stop now, you’ll never know what I had planned for you.
Emily searches JJ’s face, which is full of mysterious mischief. “What are you talking about?” JJ says nothing, and Emily mulls about possible answers. The blocked off dates on their shared calendar eventually jump to mind and she raises a curious brow. “Does this have anything to do with why Henry is having a sleepover at Penelope’s next month?”
JJ skilfully avoids her prodding gaze. “That’s for me to know and for you to find out.” None of which does anything to sate Emily’s curiosity. JJ nods towards the tree. “Your Christmas list wasn’t very long, so I had to get creative.”
It’s not the first time Emily’s lacking list is brought up in conversation. Even Henry had looked at her sceptically when he had made her read it to him. It’s just… Despite this being the first proper Christmas she has celebrated since—forever, it’s also been the hardest year to think of what she wants most.
Her gaze flickers from JJ, to Henry and back. As cliché as it sounds, she has already got everything her heart desires.
She’s pretty sure she’s the luckiest woman alive.
JJ gently tucks Emily’s hair behind her ear, bringing her back to the conversation at hand. “Where’d your mind go?”
Emily blinks, allowing the thoughts to slide away. The emotion stays, taking form of a warmth, glowing in her chest. “Nowhere.” She remembers JJ’s initial comment and a frown pulls at her brows. “And by the way—Your list wasn’t much longer than mine?”
“Well,” JJ drawls, teasing smile back, playing at her lips. “I don’t know if you remember this, but Santa gave me a girlfriend last year. It’s hard to think of anything that is going to top that.”
Red blooms on Emily’s face as JJ laughs, and Emily knocks their shoulders together. “You suck.”
“I love you too,” JJ says, pressing a kiss to the apple of Emily’s cheek.
It prompts more heat to rise, setting her face aflame, and a flutter awakens in her stomach at the proclamation. Emily is sure she’ll never get tired of hearing those words fall from JJ’s lips.
Silence settles, enveloping them in a comfortable embrace as they watch Henry mess around. Emily breathes in the easy quiet between them. It’s impossible to think things have ever not been like this. How different would her life be, had she not gone down the path that led her to meet Henry, and through that, JJ?
Would she have spent today in an empty apartment, content with life, not knowing what she was missing beyond simple satisfaction?
Nowadays, her heart is so full of love it’s hard to remember a time without.
Henry scores an imaginary goal and cheers himself on, completing a silly victory dance that has him sliding around the hardwood floor on his fuzzy socks.
“At least Henry had no problem with his wish list this year,” Emily breaks through the quiet.
JJ laughs at that. “I think you gave him too much power when you asked me out last year,” she says, voice full of humour. “Now he thinks Santa is a miracle worker. I hope he won’t be too sad when he realises he didn’t get the white Christmas he asked for.” The weather forecast has been hopelessly grey and rainy for weeks. “At least his other two main wishes were a little more attainable for Santa to deliver on.”
Her eyes are soft as she looks at Emily.
The soccer ball he had just unwrapped was high on Henry’s list. Emily’s presence on Christmas, not far behind.
The easiest request she has ever said ‘yes’ to.
Emily hadn’t given this year’s Christmas much thought, before Henry had shared his wish list. It would have been easy – and not particularly unpleasant, either – to fall back on old traditions and habits, but last year’s Christmas holds a special place in her heart. It had been different—the good kind, to acknowledge the holiday and spend time with friends, despite past experiences.
She studies JJ’s face.
Friends, who have become something else entirely, this past whirlwind of a year.
(Emily doesn’t use the word family easily, but it’s the term that jumps to mind).
And so, it had been easy to comply with Henry’s request. Emily spends more time over at JJ and Henry’s place than her own these days, anyway. It is funny, how the definition of home has changed without her noticing.
“Emily?” JJ bites her lip, a question brewing behind her eyes.
“Yes?”
“Can I ask you something?”
Emily hums in easy acquiescence. Still, hesitation keeps JJ’s words at bay.
“Never mind.”
“No,” Emily lightly shakes her head. “Go ahead.”
JJ opens her mouth. Then closes it again. Her gaze strays, wandering around the room, towards Henry, up along the Christmas tree they decorated together, to the wall holding pictures from every phase of JJ and Henry’s life together. More and more pictures with Emily have been popping up in the collection over the past year.
“JJ?”
“I didn’t mean to ask you today,” JJ finally says. “It’s already a big day, and you don’t need that kind of pressure, though I don’t think you’ll want to say no, but—”
“JJ,” Emily cuts her off, catching her wringing hands in her own. JJ’s wide eyes meet her own. “What did you want to ask?”
It’s quiet, for a moment. Then—
“Move in with us.”
Emily inhales sharply. “I—Yes?”
“You practically already live here,” JJ says. She isn’t nervous, exactly. She sounds as sure as she has ever been. It’s clear her hesitation is about her timing, more so than about broaching this topic. “And we miss you when you when you aren’t here. I know we’ve mentioned it before, and you’ve had concerns about space, but I know we can make it work and—I think the time is as right as it will ever be.”
Emily can tell she has rehearsed the words in her mind, playing out this very moment. She lets them sink in, aware JJ is watching her every reaction.
They have talked about it before, several times over these past few months, but have yet to make a permanent decision. Emily wants to do right by JJ and Henry in every single way possible, and it’s not something she takes lightly.
“And if space ends up being too big a concern, then—Well, maybe we could eventually look for another place. Somewhere bigger. An apartment or house with more room to work from home and host friends.”
Emily fills with hope as she lets herself imagine it. From the corner of her eye, she watches Henry skip around the room behind his new soccer ball, and finally finds her voice. “A yard for Henry to play in,” she adds softly.
“Yes,” JJ breathes.
“And—You’re sure?”
Emily knows the answer, but she has to double-check.
“I’m sure if you are,” JJ says easily. “I’m sorry for springing this on you today, but… Being here together, today…” There is the kind of love in her eyes Emily still sometimes has difficulty grasping is directed towards her. “Well, it just got me dreaming, is all.”
Despite her propensity to worry and doubt, it’s something Emily wants, too. She has been trying to better listen to that part of herself for a long time now. Maybe… Maybe this is something she’ll just have to dare to give in to.
“I—Yes.”
Hope blooms on JJ’s face, and Emily knows she made the right choice. “Yes?”
Emily nods.
“We’ll sit down soon. Figure out the details. Once Christmas is over.”
“Once Christmas is over,” Emily confirms.
They stare at each other with stupid matching smiles.
“What are you talking about?”
The curious voice startles them out of their bubble. Henry doesn’t wait for an answer before climbing up on the couch, settling himself in the tiny sliver of space between them.
“You’re squishing me,” he declares, despite being the one who got himself into this exact situation, limbs pressed to his body. He laughs when Emily and JJ shift to wrap their arms around him and properly sandwich him between them.
“Henry sandwich!” JJ sings, peppering kisses to his face, wherever she can reach.
He sits still and takes the assault for approximately a minute, before becoming a wiggly monster in their embrace.
Emily pokes his belly and presses a smacking kiss to his cheek. “Time for breakfast?” she asks, sharing a gaze with JJ, who nods.
“Breakfast!” Henry cheers. He finally escapes from their grasp and skips to the kitchen. “Can we have pancakes?”
JJ easily unfurls and gets to her feet, holding out a hand to help Emily up as well. “We can.”
Henry pokes his head back around the doorway. “Can I help to make them?”
“I think you might have to,” JJ says. She throws Emily a mischievous look. “Emily surely isn’t going to be any help.”
“Hey!” Emily protests, chasing after JJ to the kitchen to the sound of Henry’s boisterous giggles. “Take that back!”
Joy swells in her heart, leaving her breathless and smiling from ear to ear.