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kbirb's Winter Gifts of 2025
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Published:
2025-12-26
Words:
1,443
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1/1
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He's Just a Rich Boy, From a Rich Family! I'm Just a Rich Boy, Please Get Me Surgery! Spare Him This Life From This Dysphoria!

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Summary:

The events leading up to Tim's top surgery, told in texts and voice memos.

A prequel to hoebiwan's fic about Tim coming out to his parents after top surgery!

Notes:

Note from kbirb: I tried to use this whatsapp work skin I love but like every time I switched conversations there wasn't enough space between them and it was UGLY so I spent days trying to make it work and then gave up. So I hope this format is good enough kdsljghskjdlfhgl

Thank you Flowerparrish for helping me bring this concept to life by doing Tim's voice memos ilysm

(Please see the end notes for transcripts of the voice memos! Since a traditional podfic would have a text version somewhere to reference we decided to include them ~)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Text Conversation: Bruce & Theodosia

Theodosia: I've been thinking

Bruce: Thinking is a good thing!

Theodosia: Jason says it's bad when I think too much????????

Bruce: Don't listen to him, he's a chronic overthinker.

Theodosia: kjfhgkjlll

Bruce: I do not know that acronym… kill jesus fucking hell god kill jesus live laugh love?

Theodosia:
.gif of Dean Winchester sighing and rubbing his forehead

Theodosia: It's a keyboard smash bruce

Bruce: I see.

Theodosia: Like i was laughing

Bruce: Why would you not use "LOL," Theodosia?

Theodosia: Oh my GOD, bruce, no one says LOL anymore

Theodosia: Also can u not call me that anymore?

Bruce: Theodosia?

Theodosia: yeah

Bruce: Okay. I can't call you, you know, though. Despite your assurances that this "WhatsApp" is encrypted.

Theodosia: I actually used additional encrypting soooooooo

Bruce: Regardless, it is a risk. So, is there a new name you wish to be called?

Text Conversation: Red Hood & Robin

Robin: SOS

Robin: [Play voice memo:]

Hood: oh

Hood: my

Hood: god

Hood: I'm literally in the middle of interrogating a drug dealer and you messaged me on my RED HOOD PHONE and I thought it was an emergency

Robin: THIS IS AN EMERGENCY HOOD

Hood: fucking FINE hold on

Robin: i don't have a hold on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hood: alright bad guy knocked out jeez

Robin: nice

Hood: Anyway… how the fuck do you want me to help you with this?

Robin: idk but B just texted me AGAIN

Hood: just tell him you're helping me with something dumbass

Robin: yeah okay

Robin: what names have we tried out????

Hood: none of them stuck I thought

Robin: HELP ME

Hood: okay so I found the list but it's on my other phone, i'm going to read them off okay?

Hood: [Play voice memo:]

Robin: no they still itch to be thought of being called them

Hood: okay yeah, a few more

Hood: [Play voice memo:]

Robin: huh is it?

Robin: yeah I listened again

Robin: Tim

Robin: Timmy? no

Robin: Timothy

Robin: nah just Tim

Hood: so… Tim?

Robin: yeah I think so

Hood: cool, because fuckhead is waking up i gtg

Robin: 👍

Robin: OH AND, so we dont get in trouble w b

[Messages erased]

Text Conversation: Bruce & Theodosia

Bruce: Regardless, it is a risk. So, is there a new name you wish to be called?

Bruce: Hello?

Bruce: Please report in.

Theodosia: Sorry, J called on my other phone gotta help with a You Know

Bruce: I see. Is he okay?

Theodosia: yeah he's fine, just needs me to look someething up

Bruce: Understood. Please report in when you are done.

Theodosia: it worked I stalled B

Bruce: Stalled me?

Theodosia: fuck shit wrong person

Theodosia: i

Theodosia: brb

[Voicemail:]

Bruce: Buddy, why did that go directly to voicemail?

Theodosia: hi sorry I wasn't stalling nope not at all

Theodosia: Tim

Bruce: Tim?

Theodosia: Call me tim please

Bruce: Timothy Drake. I like it. Have you chosen a middle name?

Tim: I think just tim for the first name and no middle name

Tim: I wanted to pick peter but jason said not to copy him

Bruce: Jason was very proud of himself for picking a middle name, yes. You have time to figure it out. When will you be telling Janet and Jack?

Tim: idk

Tim: anyway how do I get on T?

Bruce: [Link: uofgothamhealth.org/gender-affirming-care]

Bruce: But we will need parent consent.

Text Conversation: Jason & Tim

Tim: SOS

Jason: pls stop sending me SOS before you turn boy who cried wolf

Tim: But its an actual emergency

Tim: also so was the last one??

Tim: ANYWAY

Tim: [Play voice memo:]

Jason: i see

Jason: three solutions for you

Jason: 1) yeah I think bruce could sign off on it if you did some computer magic and made him your guardian. or like 2) you could forge your parents signatures? but also 3) you could hit up my friend penn because they run a clinic for people who can't afford it

Tim: I usually don't mind doing illegal things but

Tim: If i go w 1 then Bruce might think my parents are transphobic or refuse and if i go w 2 then i'm doing something illegal which i don't usually mind but this is only for my benefit but is 3 even safe

Jason: bruce wouldn't say no but anyway, yeah, penn knows what's they're doing

Jason: i wouldn't call someone who did something unsafe to trans people a FRIEND, timbo

Tim: Timbo?

Jason: deal with it

Tim: Okay but then i'm like taking resources away from people in need

Jason: you get like an allowance or a trust fund or something right?

Tim: OH

Jason: just donate to penn's clinic in exchange for gender affirming care, win-win y'know?

Text Conversation: Bruce & Tim

Tim: [Play voice memo:]

Bruce: If you are concerned about your parents paying for it, I will do so. However, I would prefer not to go behind their backs.

Tim: But like we already have been?

Bruce: I specifically told you about the LEGAL route and to get parent permission. You opted for illegal, Tim.

Tim: No it's not illegal I'm literally funding an organization to help underprivileged trans people.

Bruce: Touché. Regardless, it is not the legal avenue to obtaining testosterone, in the grand scheme of things.

Tim: blah blah legal blah blah

Bruce: Tim.

Tim: Bruce.

Bruce:
FWD:

.gif of Dean Winchester sighing and rubbing his forehead

Tim: Did you just forward me my own text?

Bruce: I couldn't find the image in my phone and it perfectly encapsulated how you are making me feel in this moment.

Tim: Back to the subject thnx

Bruce: Ah, yes. If you wish to go forward with surgery prior to your parents arriving in town, I will gladly sign off as a guardian, provided you accept the forgery of such documents to achieve gender euphoria? I will pay for it out of pocket as well, as I know your finances are currently going towards… Penn.

Tim: I'll think about it.

Text Conversation: Jason & Tim

Tim: SOS

Jason: 🔪

Tim: Hey that's what my SOS is!!

Jason: omg tim why are you not texting me from the batphone are you okay????

Tim: Awwww you do care!

Jason: TIMOTHY SHORTSTACK DRAKE

Tim: That would be a terrible middle name jay

Jason: what did you need

Tim: So bruce offered to pay for me to get top surgery

Jason: and this is an SOS bc why?

Tim: [Play voice memo:]

Jason: have you met penn's boyfriend freddy yet?

Tim: I don't think so

Jason: well lemme just say that freddy can give you the ole top chop like in a week, no waiting, no government, no owing bruce

Tim: SIGN ME THE FUCK UP BRO

Text Conversation: Jason & Tim

Tim: Good news!

Tim: My parents aren't transphobic!

Tim: Bad news!

Tim: [Play voice memo:]

Jason: this is above my pay grade

Tim: I don't pay you????

Jason: exACTLY MY POINT

bonus: letter sent to Mr. Bruce Thomas Wayne from Drs. Jack and Janet Drake.

Dear Mr. Bruce Thomas Wayne,

This letter is served as a notice of your unwarranted harassment activities, or the equivalent thereof. You are hereby required to cease and desist all attacks on our family. While we love and support our son, Tim, you have been encouraging reckless behavior. Your relationship with him is highly irregular. Some may say problematic, frankly. While we support that he has found a mentor in a successful trans man, the choices you have made regarding his transition were not your place to do so. By allowing him to obtain his testosterone and double mastectomy—known as a "top surgery"—in back alleys, you have put his life at risk in a way that we cannot allow as parents.

If you do not cease communication with our son, Tim Drake, we will be forced to file a harassment lawsuit against you.

We know that you do not wish to bring our private distaste for one another into the public eye. Therefore, we request that you comply with our requests immediately. You have five business days to formally cut ties with our son, citing guilt over the betrayal of his parents, or our hands will be forced.

Sincerely,

Drs. Jack and Janet Drake

Bruce stares down at the letter in his hands. Delivered via certified post, as if the Drakes do not live only a property over. He could just… walk over there and talk to them about this. Which, okay, he'd tried to do. Which may have been the issue, may be why they escalated from frosty voicemails to this.

"JASON," Bruce yells, the name echoing down the halls. "Get your ass down to the foyer. Immediately!"

Notes:

HAPPY CHRISTMAS/MERRY NEW YEAR/HELL YEAH TOP SURGERY, DARRIN!!

Voice Memo Transcripts:

Tim's Voice Memo 1 (Robin to Hood):

B and I were texting because I was ready to tell him I'm trans like for real and not just to be Robin because he's like the must secure trans man I know [deep breath] but he asked me what I want to be called 'cuz I asked him not to call me by my deadname and now I'm blanking on a name and he's going to wind up [deep breath] calling me if I don't text back soon and then I'll panic OUT LOUD.

Jason's Voice Memo 1 (Hood to Robin)

So when we made the list we got through like… half of them. Derek, Xander, Rupert, Dean, Sam, Jack – which, sidebar, Supernatural names are so 2013 and also your dad is already named Jack?, Bobby, Agni, Kai, Nate, Alec, aaaaaaand Eliot. So unless any of those sparked joy in you this time, I'm guessing not those?

Jason's Voice Memo 2 (Hood to Robin)

The names we have left were uuuuuh. Lao or Lu? Brennan? Spencer? Dexter – please don't name yourself after a serial killer – or uh Harry or Morgan. Wow you like TV shows. Anyway. Looks like the only ones left are… Lance, Hodgins, Beckett, Tony, Tim, Leroy, Jethro… yikes… uuuuuh Adam, Jamie, Peter, orrrrrrr Tim. Wait, I already said Tim. Why is that on here twice?

Tim's Voicemail: [ringing] Hey it's me! Leave a voicemail after the [beeeeeeeeep]
Tim's Voice Memo 2 (Tim to Jason):

I asked Bruce how I could get T shots and he sent me info on the health clinic, right?? But then he said I need parent consent! But I can't get that because I don't even know how to tell my parents I'm a boy when they're never even home, let alone in Jersey, let ALONE in the COUNTRY. [deep breath] It's not like they're transphobic, I mean probably not, they don't hate Bruce for trans reasons they just hate him for pretentious and pointless reasons but uuuuuh [deep breath] Sorry I'm rambling again. Anyway what do I do? Can Bruce be my parent? Can I even ask him for that? JAY HELP.

Tim's Voice Memo 3 (Tim to Bruce):

Heeeeeeeeeeeey B. So uh no need for panic because I know they love me very much but my parents just let me know they'll be home in like two months for an extended stay. Which means I'm going to come out to them, right? Which also totally going to be fine!! I think!! But the thing is I really want to have top surgery and I don't know if they'd pay for it, transphobic or not, so like. Solutions?

Tim's Voice Memo 4 (Tim to Jason):

So the thing is that's really nice of Bruce cuz I've put a lot of my allowance into Penn's clinic already like I get what he's saying. But also he does so much for me already and my parents don't know about the trans stuff yet so I feel like if they could trace the paperwork back and see forged papers allowing me to get surgery from Bruce… They'll have dual anuerisms. Or they'll kill Bruce. Or they'll ship me off to like Serbia to get me away from his influence or something dumb.

Tim's Voice Memo 5 (Tim to Jason):

I maybe got defensive when my mom called me TIMOTHY and then gave me a whole middle name I didn't sign up for so then I blurted out that I got my T and top surgery through friends of friends and shit [deep breath] and then I told my mom I wanted my middle name to be Bruce because at least HE'S supportive of me and now they're trying to ban me from ever speaking to him again [deep breath] which is CLEARLY a problem considering like y'know [pause]. So help please.