Archive of Our Own

Sion often mourns the fun life he could be living. His last relationship ended over a year ago—not that it could have really been described as fun anyway, with the dinner dates that felt like corporate meetings and the sex scheduled on their shared Google calendar. Some lives are just destined to be bleak, Sion knows, and some people find fulfillment in that. He knows he’s too young to give up on his own self fulfillment, but by the time he’s clocking out of his mind-numbing office job, he’s too mentally checked out to make any excitement of his evenings.

The most thrilling development in recent months has been moving into a new apartment building. Closer to work, further from his family. Higher in rent and lower in broken appliances and chipping tile. Maybe Sion should be happy. Maybe this is what success looks like for Sion. But the kitchen is a blank slate of stainless steel, the living room is beige, his bedroom window overlooks office spaces and concrete parks, the bed is vastly unoccupied, and the extra vanity in the bathroom feels tauntingly empty.

Sion is bored, and he feels his sanity slipping away. He’s lonely, stuck in his routine. Boredom sits in his bones when he nods at the same lobby worker at the same time as he does everyday. When he waits for the elevator and counts down from ten in his mind. When he mindlessly presses the button for the fourth floor.

Sion is lonely. Which is probably why his head whips up when a hand grabs the elevator door before it can close. Which might explain why he zeroes in on the man that joins him. Why he smiles and suddenly feels a bit short of breath.

The man smiles back, and the loneliness becomes suddenly weightless on Sion’s shoulders. His eyes twinkle in the elevator’s fluorescent lighting before he quickly looks down at his feet.

Sion almost wishes he could ask him what floor number he can press for him, just so he’d look back up at Sion once more. But Sion already knows where he’s going—to the fourth floor, to the door right next to Sion’s.

His name is Riku, not that Sion had to sort of stalk him to find out. Their mailboxes are right next to each other’s, so what if Sion peaked at the name in the address? He just had to confirm what he’d heard from Riku’s frequent visitors, had to make sure he was hearing them right anytime he’d come home to them waiting outside the door to be let in or through the surprisingly thin walls between the two apartments.

Riku has been nothing but nice since Sion moved in next to him, but he isn’t exactly the most talkative. Sion isn’t either, but it’s something about how devastatingly pretty his next door neighbor is that has his skin itching with the irrational urge to talk. To ask how his day was, what he’s having for dinner, if he’d like to join Sion for whatever depressing takeout he decides he’s craving tonight. They’ve spoken a few times, but Riku doesn’t seem to like Sion very much.

It’s not that Riku is unkind to him. He just always gives short, polite responses whenever Sion gathers the courage to try to make small talk. He hardly makes eye contact. For all Sion knows, Riku thinks he’s a stalker.

Sion isn’t, they just happen to have similar schedules and Sion sees him coming and going quite often. Sion wishes he could talk more. Fate grants him so many opportunities, but when he sees Riku, all words fail him. He wracks his brain for something clever to say, something charming, something to get Riku as hooked as Sion is. But Riku always looks so busy, like he’s been plucked right out of whatever busies him and placed frantically in their hallway, and Sion can’t find it in himself to bother Riku. Riku has his own life. Riku has hobbies, has school and a job, has friends. He always has his school bag or big duffel slung over his shoulder, or armfuls of groceries, and Sion could ask if he needs help. Sion could, but he doesn’t. Sion’s complacency keeps him one door’s length away from Riku.

It doesn’t help how often Sion sees Riku welcoming or seeing off guests. Always one at a time, always at later hours in the evening. And then, as Sion sits in his beige, downy comforter watching some mind numbing TV show or as he thinks of drowning himself in his bubble bath, he hears music and laughter through the thin walls. Voices, hushed, barely heard over the loud music. Shushing when one raises too much. And then they leave, and say, “I’ll see you next week,” and the next night, it’s someone else.

Sion’s not one to judge what someone else chooses to do with their free time. Sion is for bodily autonomy. Riku’s guests are something he just can’t help but take notice of.

No, it’s not judgment. It’s just curiosity. It’s a poor excuse for why Sion will never attempt a friendship with Riku, why he’ll never go beyond a few shared words. Riku has enough company and it will never matter that Sion thinks he’s radiant, the most beautiful person he’s seen. It will never matter because Riku is fun and bright and still youthful compared with Sion, despite them being around the same age. Because Riku hasn’t had his life force sucked out by a corporate job. Because Sion is boring and hasn’t landed a date in over six months and spends his free time catching up on cooking shows and watching Instagram reels. Riku finds his leisure time in the company of others, sleeps with whomever he pleases, comes home from some type of workout class and plays upbeat music while he has dinner. Sion thinks he might paint too, because sometimes he comes out to get the mail or pick up his DoorDash order with his guard down and a worn out, stained t-shirt on.

Tonight is the same. Sion is not a stalker, he is not some type of pervert, it’s just that for how much nicer his new place is than his old one, the walls are so much thinner. Or maybe it’s just that there was no one worth paying attention to at his last place. Sion sits down with a takeout container of pad thai and turns on the television. He hears the laughter, then the music turns on. It’s always less upbeat than what Riku listens to alone, something more vibey. More sultry.

The night ends with Riku seeing his guest out. It’s a girl tonight, though he seems to have no preference between men and women, with all genders coming and going in no particular order. She thanks Riku, says it was lots of fun, and then there’s silence. Maybe a kiss, something slow and intimate, savoring one last moment before saying goodbye. And then there’s the soft click of Riku’s door shutting, always gentle somehow when Sion’s slams shuts like it’s made of bricks.

It takes a while for it to sink in that Sion’s curiosity is born from jealousy.

There are repeat guests, he realizes. There’s one guy who looks familiar when he rides the elevator up with Sion and stops at Riku’s door, knocking to be let in. So Riku not only has many visitors, but he must be good too.

Sion is mystified, to say the least. Of course he’d like to know what it’s like to be with Riku, but more than anything, he’d just like the company. All these people not only have Riku in that way, but they all seem to know him intimately. There’s always an excited greeting, a heartfelt goodbye. And that is what Sion finds himself green over—not the sex, but the closeness. He wants Riku to see him and greet him like he’s truly happy to see him, not just like a polite neighbor.

The worst that could possibly happen, if Sion were to try and befriend Riku, is Riku turning him down. He’d do it gently, Sion is sure of it, in a way that wouldn’t hurt even if he was embarrassed. So Sion decides to try in small ways.

They take the elevator together again as Sion’s coming back from work. Riku comes in after him, and Sion takes a deep breath and prays his poor excuse of a joke will land as he says, “Let me guess, fourth floor?”

Riku laughs, and Sion will take it. Even if it’s just a pity laugh. Sion watches in fascination as Riku’s cheeks turn pink and he looks down at his shoes. “How did you know?”

“Lucky guess,” Sion replies, feeling too proud of himself as he presses the button for their floor. But then there it is again, Riku’s lack of further conversation, and Sion is sure he thinks he’s weird. Or a stalker. Sion clears his throat, the air in the elevator suddenly feeling stuffy.

The ride up is smooth, quick without any other stops, and then the elevator dings as the doors slide open to their hallway. Sion waits for Riku to leave first, looking expectantly at him as he stands off to the side. Riku looks at Sion too, seemingly waiting for the same. His polite smile, his eyes shifting from Sion to the open door. With both of their hesitation, the door slides shut again. Sion moves, finally, hand reaching to tap the open button repeatedly. The last thing he needs is more awkward silence in the ride back down and another back up. If Riku even stayed in the same elevator as him.

Riku laughs again, apparently amused with Sion’s panic, and Sion straightens up and pretends he wasn’t sweating over pressing a button.

The door opens, and Sion clears his throat again and says, “After you.”

Riku slightly bows his head as he walks past. His footsteps are slow, like he’s waiting to see if Sion will make it off the elevator sometime today. “Always a gentleman,” he says as Sion joins him in the carpeted hallway. It’s less stuffy out here, Sion breathes a little bit easier, but he feels hot all of a sudden.

“Same time tomorrow?” Sion asks, emboldened. They head down the hall to their doors.

“Sure,” Riku agrees. “As long as you promise the day after, and the day after that too.”

Talking to Riku is so much fun that Sion wonders why he hadn’t started earlier. They get to Sion’s door first, and Riku pauses in his walk as Sion unlocks his door. “Okay. I promise.”

“See you then,” Riku calls as he heads down to his apartment.

Sion stands in his doorway, waiting until Riku makes it to his. “See you then,” he repeats back weakly. “Have a good night.”

The smile Riku sends back was worth all the risk. It’s a genuine smile, reaching up to his eyes. Sion wants to see him smile all the time. It’s kind of ridiculous, Sion is aware, to feel that way after one conversation that was just a few sentences longer than the ones they typically hold. But it proves that it’s just the closeness Sion craves. It makes him want to ask Riku if he’ll clear his schedule for tonight, cancel whatever hook up lies ahead just to keep laughing and smiling that shy little smile.

Of course, Sion doesn’t. He hears Riku’s door close behind him and Sion leans his back against his own closed door in resignation. It was a step. A small, painstaking step, but progress nonetheless.

It’s a Friday night. Sion really should be hanging out with friends, or having dinner with his family, or even finding a date on some hopeless dating app. Instead he sits alone for the hundredth night in a row and tries not to eavesdrop on his neighbor’s social and sexual life.

Sion tries not to dwell too long. He hasn’t made it out with his friends in months, too busy with work or too drained from it in his free time. He moved away from his family and barely finds the time or the willingness to visit. There’s always an excuse to make, and Sion will always find it. Maybe it’s a bit of self-sabotage, but Sion hates to be a bother, so he stays home. Wraps himself in his beige comforter, a soft padding for his hard shell, and pretends the world he surrounds himself with isn’t so cold. He doesn’t think about how alone he is. He doesn’t think about how empty his bed is, how he hasn’t had a guest over once in his new apartment. How talking with Riku for two minutes made him feel more normal than he’s felt in weeks.

Sion falls asleep to the music drifting through the walls between his apartment and Riku’s. Riku has good taste in music, he thinks as he dozes off. Maybe he’ll ask him for music recommendations next time they talk.

The next time happens to be the very next morning, meeting in the hallway. It’s Saturday, so Sion rolled out of bed a little later than usual, craving an iced americano from the cafe down the street. Apparently Saturdays have Riku breaking routines too, because the girl who’d come over last night is still there with him.

They usually don’t spend the night. Not that Sion pays that much attention. He’s just observant, and Riku seems to run a strict regime. His visitors are almost always on their way by midnight. Maybe Riku prefers as few strings as possible.

The two of them freeze outside Riku’s door as they make eye contact with Sion. All three of them are stuck in a standstill.

Riku and the girl giggle together, right in Sion’s face, like they’re shy at getting caught on the walk of shame together. The girl leans in and whispers something in Riku’s ear, which he reddens at. She’s pretty. They look nice together. Though, Sion figures, Riku would look nice next to anyone. 

“See you later, oppa,” she says after a brief hug. Her eyes twinkle knowingly as she passes by Sion’s door. Like she’s saying I have something you want. Like she’s taunting him.

“Morning, neighbor,” Riku says to Sion once his date is in the elevator.

Riku making contact first is new. It catches Sion off guard, and suddenly good morning is difficult to say. He stands silently for a moment too long. Riku rubs at his earlobe. “Can I buy you a coffee?” He asks in lieu of a greeting. If Sion’s going to give this whole social life thing a try, he’s going to commit to it.

“Me?” Riku replies, as if there’s anyone else in the hallway. Sion, forced to double down, only nods like it wasn’t a completely random thing to ask. “Okay.”

“I was just on my way,” Sion explains, like it makes anything better. He’s still in sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt. Riku looks like he’s wearing something pajama-adjacent too. He follows Sion to the elevator anyway. “It’s just a little walk, if you don’t mind.”

Riku smiles politely. “I don’t mind.”

Sion tries his very best not to stare. But Riku’s hair is a little wild with sleep and his bare face is flushed and his shirt collar hangs open off his collarbone. It’s such an achingly familiar look, almost domestic, and despite being next door neighbors and crossing paths frequently, it’s a wall that Sion feels he’s never gotten past yet. Seeing Riku like this, like they could be friends. Sion feels hopeful. He also feels a little bit weird for staring.

Riku doesn’t meet his eyes, which he rarely ever does. He just glances quickly, notices Sion still looking, and looks away. “What?” He asks. “Do I have something on my face? Is it my hair?”

“No,” Sion says, shaking his head, smiling. “Sorry. It’s nothing.”

They leave the building together, Sion greeting the man working the door like he always does. This time, he even smiles at him. Sion leads the way to the cafe in silence.

This would be the perfect time for small talk, but Sion is feeling star struck at having somehow convinced the beautiful man next door to get coffee with him. Riku just seems shy, and Sion wants to know him. Know everything about him. Wants to ask him if he’s free all day just to lay out his entire life story in front of Sion. God, he’s been so bored.

“So you have weekends off?” Sion asks. He doesn’t know what exactly Riku does, just that he has a similar schedule as Sion throughout the week.

“Sometimes,” replies Riku, “but I usually work Saturday mornings. They just needed me tonight instead.”

Sion nods in understanding. He wonders how he’s made it this far with apparently no social skills—this would be the time to ask where he works, what he does for a living, but Sion’s tongue tied.

“And you?” Riku asks, much more mannered. “What do you do?”

“Office job. Admin assistant.” After hearing himself say it, maybe Sion doesn’t even want to know what Riku does for work. Whatever it is must be a dozen times more thrilling than Sion’s life.

Riku does a good job of sounding interested, softening the blow. “Ooh, so that’s why you’re always coming home in those fancy business clothes.”

It definitely does something to Sion to hear that Riku pays attention to him coming and going too, and specifically to what he hears. That Riku sees him. So he takes a deep breath and puts his own selfish, self-preserving thoughts aside and asks, “What do you do for work?”

They’ve made it to the coffee shop now, and Riku pauses their conversation as the barista asks what she can do for them.

“One iced americano, please,” Sion requests, and looks over to Riku. “Coffee?”

Riku shakes his head, looking slightly bashful. “I don’t drink coffee…”

Sion tries to contain his shock. The worker looks between the two of them silently. “No? What about tea? Lemonade?”

“Iced peach tea, please,” Riku says. The barista repeats their orders back, unimpressed, and Sion pays without any complaints from Riku.

“It’ll be just a minute,” she tells them, and they find a small table to sit at while they wait. The cafe is fairly empty for a Saturday midmorning, which is partially why Sion likes coming here. It’s always quiet, the workers are always just friendly enough, and they have a soft playlist over the speakers. Sion feels like he’s drowning through the week. It’s nice to feel light, just once.

“Thank you for buying,” says Riku earnestly. “You didn’t have to.”

Sion looks at him pointedly. “You didn’t have to say yes to coffee.”

Sion watches with avid interest as Riku’s cheeks redden. “You asked. It sounded nice.”

It dawns on Sion that he’s never even introduced himself, not officially, nor has he asked Riku’s name. And yes, Sion sort of stalked his mailbox, but there’s no telling if Riku did that same to him. “I’m Oh Sion, by the way,” he announces, hoping it isn’t too out of the blue. Or that it doesn’t outright expose his lack of manners. He extends a hand across the table toward Riku, who shakes it.

“I’m Maeda Riku,” he replies. If he thought Sion was a stalker, he doesn’t show it. They’re still holding hands. “It’s nice to meet you, Sion.”

“So what were you saying you do for work?”

“I’m a server at this Japanese restaurant on the weekends,” Riku explains. “During the week, I’m usually at school. You must be a little older than me, right?”

“I was born in 2002,” Sion responds. Riku sits up just a little straighter when he hears it.

“Ah.” He nods his head. “Sionie hyung.”

If seeing Riku all sleep tousled and comfy and taking him to his favorite coffee shop wasn’t familiar enough, hearing Riku call him like that nearly sends Sion spiraling. He chokes on nothing, and Riku’s eyes widen in concern as he watches Sion gather himself. The barista calls out their order just then, saving Sion from further embarrassment.

They walk back to their building in about as much silence as their walk to the cafe. Sion soaks up the company, tries not to think about the weight and the warmth of Riku’s hand in his, tries not to think of Riku’s lips around his name. Tries not to stare too hard at them closed around his straw, sipping his iced tea.

Sion presses the fourth floor button for them, and lets Riku off the elevator first, and tries his best to be gentleman enough to make a lasting impression so that hopefully Riku will want to do this again someday.

“Thanks again for the iced tea, Sionie hyung,” he says, sipping from his straw again and smiling coyly, like he knows just what he’s doing. “Don’t be a stranger, okay?”

“Okay,” Sion answers, trying to make the promise to himself just as much as it is to Riku. “Enjoy your weekend, Riku.”

Sion would be lying if he said a quick visit with his neighbor here and there hasn’t been drastically improving his mood. He understands that he still loathes his job and probably always will, but then he thinks of it as a means to buy Riku another fruit flavored tea and it becomes a little more bearable. There is probably something wrong with him, but it’s a problem for another day. A naive little crush is saving him. Sion will take what he can get.

It still all feels just a little impersonal, but Sion has very little energy to use in getting his hopes up, and less to use if they were to all come crashing down. So he takes it day by day, small talk by small talk.

Riku’s visitors don’t slow down at all. It doesn’t mean to Riku what it means to Sion, and that’s fine. Sion hadn’t expected it to. Riku just thinks Sion is being a good, polite neighbor. And Sion is, for the most part, but his harmless fascination is not hurting anybody, so he leaves it at that. Yes, Riku’s company fills a void that Sion hadn’t quite understood the depth of. No, Riku probably never had that type of void to begin with, and owes Sion absolutely nothing, least of all stopping his nightly escapades.

It is getting to Sion. Not the jealousy, or the curiosity, or even the longing. Just the persisting loneliness. Riku’s music bleeds from his apartment into Sion’s silent one, the laughter echoing through the walls.

The loneliness drives Sion crazy. Which is what he blames it on, one night when he’s had enough. He hears Riku’s apartment door close, and it slowly goes quiet next door, and the silence thrums in Sion’s mind. He throws his beige comforter off of himself, stuffs his feet into his slippers, and storms over to Riku’s door like a man possessed.

Sion knocks three times and waits thirty seconds. He doesn’t even know Riku’s major, or when he moved to Korea, or how long he’s lived in this building. Riku doesn’t know Sion hates his job, or that he misses his dog, or that he’s been so lonely for a year that he thinks he might die. But still, here he is, standing outside Riku’s apartment in his slippers and sweatshirt, possibly having lost his mind.

It’s not long before Riku answers the door, head poking out into the hallway. His face breaks into a smile when he sees Sion. “Hi, hyung. What’s up?”

“Hey,” Sion says, voice tired. It is late, too late for him to be digging around in something he absolutely should not. He takes a longer look at Riku, whose eyes look bright despite the dark circles under them. His hair is messy, but soft and shiny. He looks exhausted. As tired as Sion feels.

“Is there something wrong?” Riku asks, eyebrows knit up.

Sion doesn’t know what’s wrong. What Riku does in his personal time is not Sion’s business. Stressed, he runs a hand through his hair. “It’s… the music.”

Riku’s eyes widen and his jaw drops. “I’m so sorry! Is it too loud? Was I keeping you up?”

It has Sion feeling guilty, like he shouldn’t have bothered if it was going to mean Riku would look so distraught. “No, Riku, don’t worry,” says Sion. Well, it has in the past. Let the past stay in the past. It doesn’t concern Riku, none of this does. Sion doesn’t know what’s wrong with him. He tells Riku as much. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s gotten into me.”

Riku seems to take in the state of him—his hair is probably a mess, fabric lines imprinted into his skin from trying to sleep. “Do you… Do you want to come in?”

“I don’t want to intrude,” Sion insists. But what else did he come over for other than to intrude? “Um, on you or your guests, or anything.”

“It’s just me, hyung,” Riku says softly, opening his door wider. Even just from the entrance, Riku’s apartment layout itself looks similar to Sion’s. It looks so much more lived in, pictures and posters up on the walls, plants tucked up into shelves. The warmth of the recent company it held. Sion really has no business being here. “You aren’t intruding. Come inside.”

As Sion follows Riku into his apartment, something steadily sinks in. Not answers, but just the glaring realization that he might have been wrong. Maybe he’ll feel better after he gets it out of his system once and for all. The music is turned down now, the same playlist still playing on a much fainter volume.

“I can keep the volume lower if it bothers you. Just let me know.”

Riku already has water boiled in his kettle on the stove, which he uses to pour Sion some tea. “What do you have it so loud for?” Sion winces. He sounds like a grumpy old man.

“I know some of the things I do get a little loud,” Riku explains. Sion feels his own skin flushing already. If they both survive the embarrassment of this moment, Sion will be sending a gift basket to Riku’s door to apologize. “I didn’t want to disturb anyone.”

“Riku, listen–” Sion feels like such an ass. So much for wanting to be close to Riku. Now that he’s shown him hospitality and care, Sion isn’t even repaying him with very good company. “I’m not judging you, I swear, it was just curiosity—”

“Please don’t tell the building manager,” Riku begins pleading. “Please. I can’t afford to get shut down.”

Any previous questions floating around Sion’s head triple at this moment. He’s beginning to wonder if they’re talking about the same thing at all, if his suspicions were completely dead wrong. “What?”

“Between work and school and everything, I can’t find another job that suits my schedule. I’m sorry about the late hours. We’ll start being quieter.”

If Riku is this comfortable talking about his sex life, then more power to him. But if there is sex and money involved, Sion is opening up another issue he wasn’t even aware of. So, brows furrowed in confusion, jumbled up web of thoughts slowly dangling, Sion asks, “Job? What job?”

It’s only then that Sion really allows himself to pry, looking out of the kitchen into the rest of the apartment. Riku sort of gestures around the room, and Sion takes it all in. There’s a UV lamp on the dining table next to a cart full of nail polishes. A swivel office chair sitting on top of a rubber mat, across from a full length mirror on the wall. One of those electronic foot spa baths Sion’s mother used to have. It is nearly a fully furnished, working spa. God. Riku’s apartment doesn’t look just lived in, it’s worked in.

“Oh my god,” Sion mutters under his breath. He is a more jealous person than he originally thought. These people have not been Riku’s hook ups, but rather his clients. And even after all the embarrassment, Sion still finds himself jealous of them. “Riku.”

“Isn’t it pretty nice?” Riku asks, smiling. He looks proud of himself. He doesn’t seem to have picked up on Sion’s misunderstanding, or isn’t offended by it at the very least. “It took a while to get everything I needed. All my friends have been super patient.”

“So you…?”

“It’s like an amateur salon. I just picked up on all these different things from helping my sisters and my friends,” Riku tells him. “So I really just do whatever they need booked. Haircuts, colors, and washes, manicures, pedicures. Even ear piercings. You name it—I’ve pretty much tried it all.”

With every word out of Riku’s mouth, Sion feels himself falling a little harder. Riku runs a mini salon out of his apartment. It’s so endearing. Sion thinks Riku might actually be the sweetest person he knows.

“But what did you think I was doing?” Riku asks, and Sion thinks of retracting his previous statement. Riku bats his eyelashes like he knows just what Sion thought, like he wants to tease and torture him. “You seemed so… scandalized.”

Sion is quick to tell him, “Don’t worry about it.”

“Hyung–” Riku urges, and there goes his little pouty lips, and Sion feels his resolve slipping. “Please tell me, Sionie hyung.”

“It’s kind of a funny story, really,” Sion says, clearing his throat. He looks around the apartment some more, hoping that if he looks nervous enough, Riku will drop it. Riku just looks at him, keeps pressing on with his expectant eyes, and Sion takes a deep breath. “I thought you had a lot of… close friends.”

“Well, I do.” Riku sticks his nose up like he’s proving a point, offended that Sion would imply he doesn’t have a lot of regular friends.

“Like partners,” clarifies Sion, cheeks burning and mind racing with an escape plan. But he’s come this far, and Riku hasn’t turned him away or laughed in his face yet. Instead, Riku’s face starts turning pink too.

“Oh,” he says, rubbing his cheek as if he can will away the flush. “Like partners.”

“There wouldn’t be anything wrong with it if you did,” Sion rushes out. “But I was just sort of– I was jealous.”

Riku, to his credit, at least tries to suppress his laughter. He raises his eyebrows, wearing an amused smile. “Jealous?”

Something is on Sion’s side today, some type of miracle or fate or higher power, because Riku responds so well to Sion’s outlandish approach. He’s laughing, when he could be kicking him out. He’s placing a gentle hand on Sion’s arm to steady himself while he laughs, something coy and sweet.

“Are you still jealous now that you know the truth, hyung?” Riku asks.

“I am,” Sion replies.

“Do you want to make an appointment? I could move around my schedule a little bit. Maybe Saturday evening?” Riku suggests. “Should I pencil you in?”

“I think I could use a trim. Pencil me in,” Sion tells him. He takes his mug over to the sink to wash it. Riku looms behind, leaning against the kitchen counter. “I’m sorry for coming over so late. For bothering you.”

Riku takes the washed mug from Sion to dry it off and put it away. “You didn’t bother me. I’d never mind you coming over.”

It’s so warm in Riku’s place. So comfortable, even if it is slightly converted into a salon. It’s safe. Sion wonders, once again, why he never did this sooner. He wants to do it more, come over when he’s bored and Riku finally has free time. Spend their free time together. The only hurdle left now is not quite knowing if Riku would like that too.

“Sionie hyung,” Riku murmurs, coming closer. He brushes his hand through Sion’s hair, and Sion can’t help but lean into the touch. Riku is so pretty up close, even prettier than Sion could have imagined. Sion wonders if he’s even real, if maybe he’s dreamt this whole night. “You look so exhausted. I feel terrible for keeping you up. I’ll walk you back over, okay?”

The tiredness settles over Sion like a cozy blanket, softening the edges of everything. Riku is warm beside him, drawing closer with each breath in. He tells Riku, “You don’t keep me up. Not the sound, at least.”

“What is it then? Either way, I’m sorry.”

“I can’t stop thinking of you,” Sion confesses, “and that’s what keeps me up at night.”

From such a close angle, Sion can clearly see just how bright red Riku goes. He looks away quickly, avoiding Sion’s eye contact like it will shock him, and clicks his tongue. “You are such a terrible flirt.”

“Is it working?” Sion grins at Riku, stares long enough to catch his eyes for just another second. Riku groans, but he hardly sounds annoyed.

“Yes,” he whispers. “Yes, it’s working.”

It is the biggest miracle Sion has seen in months, if not years. And yes, he knows not to tie his self worth to other people, but it feels good to spend time with Riku and to know Riku might like him too. It feels almost too good to be true. “Okay. I should get going.”

“Okay.” Riku cups Sion’s face in his hand, stroking his thumb across Sion’s cheekbone. “Sleep well, Sionie hyung.”

Sion wants to kiss him so badly. But they’ve been through a lot tonight alone. He takes a deep breath, nods, and starts pulling away. Riku surprises him with a soft kiss on his cheek. “Goodnight,” Sion whispers before he’s walking back down the hallway and tucking himself back into bed, alone but feeling satisfied for once.

Saturday can’t come soon enough. The rest of the week drags on in the same slow motion blur it always does, but it helps to have something at the end of it to look forward to.

Sion meets Riku in the hallway, like he always does. He hears his guests coming and going. He hears the music. But now, buried underneath the music, he hears the hum of the nail drill or the blow dryer. He hears the salon gossip and the laughter. It doesn’t make Sion lonelier anymore, but rather excites him. Now Sion takes note of Riku's friends’ shiny, freshly dyed hair or their glossy nails or their red and swollen earlobes adorned with brand new earrings. How happy they all seem to have spent time with him. Sion can’t wait.

It’s true that Sion really has been needing a trim before Riku’s offer fell into his lap. He’ll sit in Riku’s chair, feel Riku’s fingers through his hair. He’ll be on the other side of the wall for once. Maybe Sion’s weird for anticipating it so much, but he doesn’t care. It’s the closeness he’s been craving.

Sion runs a few errands throughout the day. Riku had left early for work—Sion had passed him leaving while he came back with his morning coffee. Riku had smiled at him, told him “see you tonight,” and Sion felt his stomach flutter with nervous excitement. Sion can only assume that Riku’s gotten off from work by the time he returns from his stops at the laundromat and grocery store. He gives it a little longer anyway, if for no other reason than to psych himself up. It’s just Riku. Just his sweet, beautiful next door neighbor that he’s hopelessly fallen for. No big deal.

Sion knocks on Riku’s door, and Riku answers it almost immediately. Almost like he had been waiting for Sion. “Hi,” he says, his sweet little face glowing in the warm lighting of his apartment, a stark contrast to the bright white lighting of the halls.

Sion follows him in, refamiliarizing himself with the interior of Riku’s apartment. It’s stupid how nervous he feels, almost tripping over his own feet as he follows closely behind Riku. “How was work? Sorry for taking up your free time tonight.”

“No worries. I’m happy you came.” Riku helps break up the tension, just from his presence alone as well as his soft voice. “Can I shampoo you first?”

It’s almost professional, the way Riku speaks to him and guides him toward the bathroom. Riku has Sion sit on the floor next to the bathtub and lean his head back over a shampoo basin attached to it. He smiles down at him, and Sion immediately can tell why Riku has such a devoted customer base.

The water kicks on, and Riku hovers the shower head over Sion’s hair. “Tell me if you like the temp,” he murmurs, holding the hose in one hand and combing the other through Sion’s hair. He’s careful not to get tangled or tug, leaning over Sion’s shoulder. Riku is so close that Sion can feel his body heat, warmth pressing through their layers of clothing, and Sion feels a little bit crazy thinking of Riku getting this close to other people.

“It’s good,” Sion hums. “Feels nice.”

Riku is silent in focus on his task. Once Sion’s hair is fully wet, he turns off the water and goes in with shampoo. “You’ve got great hair,” he tells Sion, gentle fingers massaging at Sion’s scalp. Sion’s eyes fall shut of their own accord, body feeling steamy from the heat of the water and Riku sitting so close, relaxation sinking deep into his bones as Riku drags his fingers across his scalp. “And nice eyelashes too.”

Sion blinks one eye open to see Riku, to maybe catch him staring, but Riku looks away from Sion’s face even quicker.

“Close your eyes,” Riku says, cheeks tinged pink. “Relax.”

Sion even lets his shoulder relax, tension easing out of the muscles at Riku’s touch. The hot water comes back on, and Riku rinses out all the suds. He leans closer, chest nearly pressing into Sion’s. Does he really do this with everyone? Sion doesn’t even want to imagine it.

“Still feels nice?” Riku asks, voice raised just a bit over the sound of running water past Sion’s ears. Sion nods his head, eyes closed. A few silent moments go by, careful fingers brushing through Sion’s hair, steam clouding up his mind as Sion lets his head hang fully back over the basin. Riku uses the slack to turn Sion’s head a bit, sneaking his fingers to the back of Sion’s neck and rubbing at his hairline. “How’s work? You always seem beat.”

“Work is…” Sion’s voice feels hoarse from how deep into relaxation he is. “It’s work. I don’t love it.”

“No?” Riku turns his head the opposite way to get to the other side, scratching his nails behind Sion’s ear. “Are you happy at least?”

There’s something about being cooped up in Riku’s bathroom, having him so close, steam turning the room into a hot spa. The truth spills out of Sion’s mouth like honey. “No, not really,” he tells Riku. “I’m not sad. But I'm not happy.”

Riku clicks his tongue once and kills the water. “Because of work?” He asks before his fingers slip back into Sion’s hair, smoothing conditioner into each strand.

“Yeah,” says Sion, “because of work.”

And that’s mostly the truth. When Sion takes a step back and looks at it all from a broader perspective, he feels pretty good about himself otherwise. It helps to know he can still make friends, still make conversation with people and have his presence enjoyed. Riku doesn’t make him speak again as he rinses out the thick lather of the conditioner. His hand comes firmly underneath Sion’s neck, lifting it up enough to slip a towel under and start towel drying the ends of Sion’s hair.

“Done?” Sion asks, sitting up as Riku drags the towel across the back of his neck. His eyes still feel heavy. He probably could have slept like that, neck hanging over Riku’s bathtub with Riku’s hands in his hair. “You’ve got a gift, Riku.”

Riku smiles proudly, bare hand coming into contact with Sion’s neck, fingers pressing into the tense muscle. He trails down to Sion’s shoulder, digging in. “You really needed this,” he whispers.

Riku doesn’t have to be so close, but he sits with his body still pressed against Sion’s, rubbing his shoulders. Sion wonders if this is part of the regular service, or if it’s just complimentary for him. He hopes it’s exclusive to him. He wishes Riku would sit closer. That he’d massage down Sion’s back, over his waist. He closes his eyes and tries to stop thinking like such a pervert.

“Come on. Let’s get you trimmed up,” Riku says, pushing himself up to his feet and extending a hand to help Sion up. They head back out to the living room, and Riku has Sion sit in the swivel chair. He tucks a dry towel around the collar of Sion’s shirt. “I’ll just do a little. Not too much for our first time together.”

The wording sends a little chill down Sion’s spine. So much for not being a pervert. Riku takes out hair scissors and a comb and brushes right through his innuendo. “Thanks again for doing this. You didn't have to.”

“I know,” Riku says, snipping away at Sion’s ends. “But you wouldn’t ask me out like a normal person.”

Sion's mouth falls open in a gasp and he catches Riku in the reflection. His cheeks are pink from his own words, like it was hard for him to get it out, but he wears a little self satisfied smile when he notices Sion’s shock. “I didn’t know you wanted me to.”

Riku stays pink and stares into Sion’s hair like he’s hoping he’ll forget about it. His tongue pokes between his lips as he concentrates, trimming Sion’s hair section by section. Sion is endlessly entertained, just by watching him through the mirror.

“I think you need some external fulfillment,” Riku says out of nowhere. “Outside of work. And if it doesn’t help, it’s never too late to start over.”

“External fulfillment,” Sion repeats, mulling it over. He feels emboldened by Riku’s earlier admission. “Can you help me with that?”

“Sionie hyung,” Riku chides. “Don’t tease me, or I’ll mess up your hair.”

Riku is just too cute, too easy to tease now that Sion knows how to do it. But Riku sounds like he’s trying to give sound advice, so Sion tries to get serious. “I just always expected to love my job. Maybe not love it, but find more purpose in it. Maybe that’s unrealistic.”

It could be how relaxed Sion is, or how avid of a listener Riku is, but something cracks open the dam and Sion lets it all out. He talks about work, how he can’t find his purpose staring at a computer. He talks about missing his family but feeling burdensome if he visits them too much. He just talks, and talks, and talks, and Riku listens and calmly nods along.

When the haircut is finished, and Riku blowdries Sion’s hair, Sion feels much lighter. Riku didn’t even cut that much off, but the weight is more metaphorical than it is physical. Riku’s fingers comb through Sion’s hair again, styling it with his hands. “There’s purpose in other things too,” he sagely tells Sion, taking the towel off his shirt and dusting off any loose hairs. “That’s part of the reason why I do this, because it makes me feel good to help my friends and spend this time with them. And I need the money. But I mostly just like the company.”

“By the way, how much do I owe you?” Sion asks.

“It’s free,” Riku says. “Remember? This is a stand-in for our first date.”

“Seriously, Riku. I’ll pay.”

Sion stands up, hoping his few inches over Riku will make him look more serious. Riku just smiles up at him. “The first appointment is complimentary,” he insists. “After that, I can think of a few other ways you could pay me back.”

It is increasingly difficult not to think like a hormonal teenager when Riku stands closer, looking up at Sion like this and saying things like that. “Can I do those things after the first appointment? Or is that too soon?”

Instead of answering, Riku just leans in closer, tilting his head up toward Sion. His lips are soft when they press into Sion’s, and Sion melts into it. His hands hold onto Riku’s waist, pulling him in closer by the small of his back, and Riku threads his fingers through Sion’s hair. It feels like a puzzle sliding into place. Like Riku really was the missing piece. They just fit together so well.

“Come over,” Riku breathes against Sion’s lips. “When you can’t sleep, or when you’re jealous, come over.”

Sion kisses him again, deeper, trying to make up for months of lost time spent pining. He squeezes Riku’s waist, drawing a soft, addictive sound out of Riku. Sion relaxes against Riku, holding him close. He draws back a little with a few more lingering kisses, trying not to move too fast. They haven’t even had a proper date, unless a ten minute coffee run or a haircut count as dates. They breathe each other in for a long moment, Riku’s fingers curling through Sion’s hair.

“You’re so handsome with your new haircut,” he says. He pinches Sion’s earlobe between his fingers. “Can I pierce your ears next?”

“Never,” Sion replies. He laughs at Riku’s mouth hanging open, offended. “I think I’m good with just a haircut.”

Riku pouts, and Sion kisses it off his mouth. He can foresee himself being very weak to that pout. “I’d be very gentle. You won’t even feel a thing. I’ll take care of you.”

Sion kisses him again, and again, and again, until he has to stop himself because it won’t long before they’ll be all over each other, and Sion is at least trying to be a gentleman. “There are other ways to do that,” he points out. Other ways for Riku to be gentle with him. Ways for them to take care of each other. Things that Sion is already looking forward to, even if he shouldn’t. “You’re very sweet though.”

“I mean it, hyung. Come over whenever.” Riku stays wrapped up around Sion, arms still slung around his shoulders and fingers in his hair and touching his ears and rubbing softly along his neck. His warmth is so tempting, drawing something obsessive out of Sion, something magnetic. Something that presses them together and won’t let go of them. “You have no idea how much I’ve wanted you to.”

Sion thinks he has a pretty good idea of how that must feel. He might need a trim tomorrow too, and the next day. Maybe another shampoo and scalp massage. Or maybe just the company. All Sion knows is that he will be back, that he wants to see Riku everyday.

Sion grabs Riku’s hand where it rests on the back of his neck and interlaces their fingers, squeezing Riku’s hand with his own. “I’ve wanted to,” Sion confesses. “I’ve wanted you for so long.”

There’s a satisfied smile on Riku’s face that Sion fights the urge to kiss again. He’s just so beautiful, pulling Sion in, roughing him up and making him lose his mind.

It’s something like a fresh start. A clean slate. There are still many things Sion would change in his life if he had the power to, but not having so much as a friendship with his gorgeous next door neighbor is no longer one of them.