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Fuyumi had always loved Cinderella's story growing up. The story of a girl who faces the cruelty the world throws at her and counteracts it with kindness.
She related to her a lot, and, when she watched the end of the movie, she always loved to imagine herself in Cinderella's shoes: getting the happy ending she always wanted.
It was a motivation to keep up her efforts, to never give up. Because, if it paid off for Cinderella, then it would surely work for Fuyumi as well. Right?
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Fuyumi had never felt so alone.
No matter how hard she tried to keep her family together, nothing worked.
No matter what she did, everything stayed the same. No, it didn’t. It got worse.
After Touya came back; Fuyumi was sure that they would all be a nice, happy family again, just like when she was a toddler.
She was sure that her brother's wounds would heal eventually and then they could all play together in the garden once more. And now even Shoto would be included!
She thought that, in no time, Natsuo and Touya would be running through the hallways, talking about everything and nothing. She thought that Shoto would join them as well, with his sweet and shy nature.
She thought Touya-nii would go visit mom in the hospital and that it would surely help speed up her recovery. Then, she could come home and they'd be together again.
She thought dad would forget about beating All Might and would simply live a peaceful life with all of them once their family was complete again.
Fuyumi thought that her dreams of a happy family would finally come true. That she could finally stop wondering whether her early childhood's memories were real or just a creation of her brain to help her cope.
Fuyumi thought everyone would finally be happy…
…
But she was wrong.
She knew that as soon as she heard about Touya not wanting to see mom. Why would he do that? It didn't make sense. Surely, he missed her after over three years of not seeing her, right?
No, he didn't. Because he doesn't care. Not about mom. Not about Shoto. Not about Natsuo. Not about Fuyumi. He only cares about Dad. The rest of them were nothing but pebbles in his shoes.
She knew that, deep down, there was something off about Touya. There had always been... But… she didn't want to accept it...
She still held the childish hope that everything would turn out okay eventually.
So, with the classic smile she wore when it felt like things were getting out of her control, she quickly reassured Natsuo and held Shoto.
Even though she herself felt a deep shiver in her bones because of the yelling on the other side of the house, she did her sisterly duty. She was there for her little brothers. She had to be. If she wasn't, then why was she even alive? If she couldn't fill the role designed for her, then what was her purpose on this planet?
Fuyumi had hold onto that hope for years. She’d tried her best to keep morals up, doing everything she could to be there for her brothers. To be the calm in the middle of the storm. The quiet when they reached the eye of the hurricane.
Fuyumi had done the same things over and over again, uselessly hoping for a different outcome. A girl praying for a miracle to happen.
She had been so stupidly naïve.
She should’ve known that miracles don’t always come true. That wishing upon a star doesn’t always work. That some things, some people, some situations, are just beyond saving. That sometimes the best thing to do is just give up.
That’s what she’d realized after she’d heard Enji and Touya’s fight that night. A night where she only wanted her family to be together for one dinner to celebrate her brothers’ achievements before they got busy with their own lives. It didn’t have to be the whole night, only for dinner. The only thing Touya had to do was get out of his room and sit on a table for less than an hour. Only eating and taking a picture together for mom.
That’s all she asked.
Was that really too much for Touya? Was that really reason enough to threaten suicide? Even worse, was her dad really going to let him get away with it? To do whatever he wanted? Was it too much to ask to let Fuyumi do what she wanted for once, just once?
Apparently, the answer was yes. Yes, it was. It was too much of an effort for her dad. An effort that Fuyumi wasn’t worthy of.
But that wasn’t even what bothered Fuyumi the most. At this point, she wasn’t angry or sad. That’s a lie. She was. She was scared.
She was scared because, if her dad: the strong, powerful, larger than life number two hero Endeavor, couldn’t do anything against his son, then what awaited the rest of them? Fuyumi can’t stop him; she was perfectly aware of that. And despite being accepted into the hero course, she knew that Shoto didn’t stand a chance against him either. The only one who could even hope to at least restrain him was Natsuo, and he would be out of the picture as soon as he left for college the next night.
Therefore, if Touya ever decided to just snap and kill them all in the spot, there was nothing they could do to stop him.
And that terrified Fuyumi.
But mostly, it drained her. Because, if none of her efforts were worth it at the end, if her family was doomed from the start, if the only thing she could do was pray for Touya to not kill any of them, then... what was the point of anything.
What was the point of trying so hard for something impossible?
What was the point of trying to change things when everything would stay the same despite all her efforts?
And oh, Fuyumi had tried. She really had. She'd always tried.
She'd done everything she could to keep her brothers' morals up.
She'd tried after Natsuo and Touya got into that argument that left her little brother trembling for days. She'd tried even though Natsuo had closed himself off after that.
She'd tried to keep Shoto's innocence despite the terrifying reality they faced. She'd tried to be there for him when Natsuo announced he was leaving so he didn't feel lonely.
She'd tried to let her dad know she was always there when he needed a hand. She'd tried to let him know she'd come whenever he asked. Tried to convince him he had other children apart from Touya.
She'd tried and tried and tried. But now she was tired of trying.
She was tired of being the only one who put an effort to pick up the pieces of their broken family to try to put it back together.
She was tired of trying to fix this messed up family.
So, she just stopped trying.
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After her hopes for that dinner were completely destroyed, Fuyumi could feel something inside her shatter. As if someone had taken her heart and filled it with frost.
Once, when she was little and life was better, she’d heard her dad mutter something about her mother being “a lot like ice herself” when he first met her. Someone strong but who, when met with Enji’s fire, might have melted away.
And that’s how she felt right now, except that she had already melted away, along with her smile.
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Natsuo had left quickly after that disastrous night, and, despite how selfish that may sound, Fuyumi couldn’t help but resent him for it. For leaving her and Shoto alone, just like their mother had.
Although, those feelings didn’t last long for two reasons. First: no matter what he did, Natsuo was still her little brother, the one she’d taken care of almost her whole life; he’d always have a place in her heart. And second: because, more than anything, Fuyumi was grateful that at least one of them managed to escape this nightmare.
Sometimes, she almost wished she could do the same, but the mere thought of leaving her dad, and worst, Shoto, all alone with Touya terrified her. So, despite feeling like an ice statue that was slowly and painfully melting as the winter passed, she stood her ground.
She stayed.
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Deep down, Fuyumi knew she was losing herself. That she was letting Touya win, giving him just what he wanted. And yet, she couldn't do anything to stop her downhill spiral.
She knew that she was following the same path as her dad, making the same mistakes as him in the family aspect. Letting herself go.
But, after all, that was only natural. She was her parents' daughter, and as such, Fuyumi seemed to have inherited their worst traits: her mother’s hopeful smile that did nothing to help them in the long run and her father’s inferiority complex, which made her think that nothing she did was ever good enough despite giving the best of herself.
She was destined to end up just like them. To repeat their wrong-doings.
There was nothing she could do about it at this point.
She felt like she was existing in her body without living. She woke up, made breakfast, went to work, got home, did the house chores she was supposed to, ate, went to bed and then everything repeated itself.
She couldn't even find it in herself to care about her family anymore. She was done.
And yet... she is still worried about Enji, about what could happen if she left him alone with Touya. The eternal curse cast upon her: Caring about everyone but herself.
She'd filled a role that was supposed to be her mother's for years. Always smiling, never complaining, always waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel, for the moment where someone would tell her that all her efforts had paid off. But now she couldn't do it anymore. She'd reached her breaking point, just like her mother had before her.
She thought that everything she was doing would give Rei enough time to heal and come back home. To help her keep this messed up family from falling apart even further. But after Shoto and her visited her...
I'm still afraid of him... them. What might happen.
I could leave whenever I feel ready. I'm just... not.
Her mother was scared...? How... how was that fair?! How come her mother, the one who should carry the responsibility of stopping her son, got a free pass while Fuyumi was the one who had to deal with this mess?!
Why did she get to choose whether to face this or not?! Why was her inaction rewarded with the gift of choosing to just avoid this whole turmoil?
Why did she get everything doing nothing, while Fuyumi gets nothing doing everything?!
It... it was not fair.
It is not fair.
You're scared? I'm terrified.
I wanted to see you for so long. But now...
I can't bear to even look at you.
…
That's what Fuyumi had said. Maybe, in another timeline, where fate had dealt her a kinder hand, she would've regretted saying that. Maybe, she would've even understood her mother's side.
Maybe her past self, who was still full of hope for a better future, could understand as well, even sympathize. After all, if she had the chance, wouldn't she also choose to do nothing rather than facing her fears?
Fuyumi would like to deny it, to say that she would always put her family first, even if it hurt her. That she'd go through Hell with them if necessary.
But in the end, she was her mother's daughter. She'd tried to fix her family through smiles and empty promises, just like her. She'd eventually realized all her efforts were worthless, just like her. This realization had inevitably led to her breaking point, just like her.
If she was in her position, she'd probably drown in her own misery and choose to stay away, just like her.
But alas, she wasn't in her position. And so, she couldn't sympathize with her. She could only cry until she ran out of tears and then merge with the background. A presence who was there but also wasn't.
An empty shell who went through the motions of life.
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That’s how she’d spent her days. Despite everything that happened after Shoto and her visited Rei (Shoto’s internships, All Might’s retirement, Shoto moving to UA, Endeavor becoming the number one hero, his fight against the High End Nomu, the Paranormal Liberation War, her dad fighting All for One in the Final War), none of it registered for Fuyumi. Sure, she was aware of her surroundings and everything, but it felt like it was happening to somebody else. Like she was only part of an audience watching everything around her take its course, as if her life was nothing but a TV show.
At least that was until her dad told Rei about how he wanted her, Fuyumi and Shoto to “leave and never come back”.
At that moment, it felt like a small flame had flickered inside her frosted heart and filled her with a renovated spark because, that was NOT fair!
There was no way that after all those years in this house, after spending her whole life here, after dedicating her whole self to putting this family together, this is what she got.
There was no way her own father was kicking her out of a house that she’d given everything to. That wasn’t fair! None of this was!
If anyone had any right to stay in that damned house, it was her. Not Enji. Definitely not Touya. Her.
This couldn’t be happening! She wanted to cry, scream, kick, bite, anything. Whatever it took for her papa to see reason.
Still, she recognized when a battle was lost; so, she could do nothing but sob as she watched her mother eyeing the documents Enji gave her with shaking hands and a solemn expression.
She was aware of the arrogant smile Touya was directing at Shoto, but she was too lost in her own sorrow to do anything about it.
– He’s crying as well −, a small part of her brain supplied, and yet, she couldn’t bring herself to even attempt to comfort him. Plus, even if she did, she’d fail anyways, so what was the point?
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Eventually, she was in the house, staring blankly at the walls of the room she was in. Shoto and her mother had already gone to their rooms to unpack their things, but Fuyumi just… couldn’t. She just kept looking at her surroundings.
All of the walls in this house were white, completely devoid of any personality: a white board for the owners to draw whatever they wanted in it.
Fuyumi hated it, despite having spent barely five minutes in it. It felt too unpersonal, too different to what she was used to. She felt so alone.
After her father’s announcement, she didn’t feel like an empty shell anymore. Which is why she could affirm her hatred for this place. Still, she almost preferred her previous numbness if it meant that she’d get rid of the heartbreak that haunted her.
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A few days after moving to the new house with her mother and Shoto, Fuyumi was (finally) unpacking her things when she found an old Cinderella notebook she kept with her.
It was beautiful. Limited edition, exported from the USA. The design was from the Pre-Quirk era, which is why it was so rare and expensive.
Her father had given it to her for her fifth birthday; the time she'd first watched the movie and got obsessed with the blonde princess. Despite not knowing at full-length how hard it was to find it, Fuyumi was still aware of the fact that her papa would've probably gone out of his way to get it, judging by the English words in the cover.
That's why she'd made sure to keep it almost intact even after all these years, sealed away in a plastic envelope where it was safe.
Where she could remember it as the source of comfort it was.
Except that it wasn't anymore.
Now, it was a reminder of the way she'd tried to force her problems away with a smile. A reminder of the way she'd been a fool for trying to fix something that had been doomed from the very beginning of its existence. For thinking that a fairy godmother would come to fix her life.
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It had only been a week since they’d moved out, but to Fuyumi it felt like ages.
As soon as her mother was done unpacking her things, she’d hidden away again. According to her, dad planned to die with Touya, no matter what they did; so apparently, that was enough of an excuse to evade their family’s problems once again.
Apart from that, Shoto was busy at UA and Fuyumi was just tired, meaning that no one had bothered to even put a single picture in the painfully blank walls of this prison.
All in all, Fuyumi was completely alone in that hellhole, which only made her hate it even more with each passing day. However, she was also filled with worry about her dad, about what him and Touya could be up to, about whether he was eating and sleeping well. She was getting desperate without any news from him, since her texts and calls were completely ignored.
Maybe that’s why, as a last resort, a distant part of her brain (the one that had been watching her life unfold for a while), supplied her with the image of a certain bird hero. More specifically, the Winged Hero: Hawks.
From the recordings she’d seen, him and her father seemed to work well together, and the young man seemed to appreciate Endeavor, so maybe he’d be able to help. Or maybe he’d just turn her down as soon as she asked; but still, she’d take anything over the silence of this house.
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Hawks had, in fact, not turned her down when she asked. Quite the opposite actually, he’d seemed ready to do anything as long as it helped his hero. He even involved All Might!
However, not even the best heroes’ attempts to get into the man’s skull worked, as Hawks had told her with a sad expression. And honestly, at this point, Fuyumi can’t even say she’s surprised.
Realistically, this was the expected outcome. If his own family couldn’t change his mind, then it was very unlikely that two Pro Heroes, no matter how kind and friendly they were, were much more successful.
Still, it was nice to dream…
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Nowadays, Fuyumi wondered if Cinderella had ever thought about just giving up. About turning her back on her stepmother and stepsisters. She wondered if Cinderella would've reached her breaking point had the prince not arrived.
Except she wouldn't, because Cinderella was always nice. A good girl. Just like Fuyumi had been.
The difference is that Cinderella got her happy ending, while Fuyumi got her tragic backstory.
Now, the princess she once adored seemed to mock her with her pearly smile and beautiful dress.
Laughing at the stupid girl who thought she could ever hope to be as happy as her. Who shaped her whole behavior around a fairy tale. Around a story that was supposed to send children to sleep, to make them dream about Cinderella's perfect life; happily oblivious to the fact that perfection was an unreachable concept.
Fuyumi wanted to throw away that stupid notebook. She'd probably even burn it if she had a fire quirk.
She knew that it would likely help her move on as well. Help her to cope.
It would be better in the long run.
Fuyumi also knew she would never bring herself to do that.
Because, deep down, a small part of her still wanted to hope for that childish dream to come true.
And because, despite not having her Charming Prince, at least Hawks was there to keep her company. To feed onto her delusions. To dream with her about a happy, impossible ending.