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Cath lifted her arms up over her head.
Levi looked at her, eyes wide, as if he wasn't sure she meant it. Then he slowly picked up the hem of her shirt and raised it up, past her belly, over her head, and off onto the bed beside her.
"Cather," he breathed.
Cath felt unbelievably exposed. Part of her wanted to grab the shirt back, or pull up the blanket, or hunch in on herself. A bolder part seemed to be in control for the moment, though, and that part left her arms at her sides, kept her shoulders back, and looked at Levi, watching him see her for the first time.
Levi's eyes darted back and forth, from her face to her stomach to her neck to her face to her breasts and then back to her face. His fingers twitched forward, then fisted in the sheet beside him.
"Can I touch you?" he asked softly.
Cath nodded. Carefully, gently, Levi brought his hands to her waist, rubbing a thumb lightly next to her belly button.
Even though she was expecting it, the touch nearly made her jump. His fingers were warmer than her own skin. He must have really good circulation, she thought. All that blood... flowing... to lots of places... warm places... if his fingers were warm, did that mean all the warm blood was there instead of being... anywhere else? Not that she particularly wanted to think about anywhere else, but what if he wasn't at all excited by --
"You're so beautiful," he said, interrupting her train of thought. "And so, so hot." His hand skimmed upwards, stopping just short of her bra. "Can I touch you here?"
Cath's heart was pounding so hard, she was almost surprised he didn't say anything about it. Her mind was all a muddle.
"Isn't that the point?" she asked, chuckling nervously.
"It doesn't have to be," Levi said. "I'd enjoy touching you, if you'd like to try it. I'd also enjoy just rubbing your back, or holding hands, putting your shirt back on and cuddling like that, or - anything, Cather. Everything you want and nothing you don’t."
Cath took a deep breath and looked at Levi's face. His eyes were soft and kind. Patient. Understanding, enough to make her feel both embarrassed and grateful. She breathed again, slowly letting the air out as she took hold of his arms.
"How are you so sweet?" she asked.
"It's all the specialty lattes," he answered, flashing a grin.
Cath said nothing for a few moments, sorting through her emotions. Levi said nothing either, waiting patiently. He stroked her ribs just firmly enough to be on the soothing side of tickling. It was reassuring. It felt safe. It made her feel powerful.
Slowly, she slid one hand down to rest on top of his and pulled his hand up in hers, so that they were cupping her breast together.
Levi was close enough that she could feel him exhale.
"Yeah?" he said quietly.
Cath nodded. "Yes," she said. It came out slightly choked up, and she hastily continued, "I'm - it's the good kind of nervous. I want to."
"Okay then, sweetheart," Levi said. He leaned in to kiss her. His lips brushed against hers, enough to start to distract a corner of her mind for just a moment, and then she felt his fingers contract underneath her own and squeeze her breast gently.
Truth be told, Cath couldn't feel much of anything through the padding of her bra, but just the light pressure of his hands and the knowledge that he was touching her there was enough to make her nearly combust. The air of the room was cold against her back, her arms, her stomach, contrasting with the warmth of Levi’s touches. He leaned further in to kiss her neck, and his torso came with him, and the feeling of his bare stomach against hers was --
Well. She wanted to say it was overwhelming, but when she thought about it, it wasn't, actually. It was warm and soft and solid and comforting. It felt grounding. So much of the time, Levi’s maleness made him feel like practically a foreign species, but at this moment, he felt like the same kind of person as her. He was familiar. He made her happy. He made her feel safe.
She felt so safe, in fact, that it was almost easy to nudge Levi's head along and let him kiss his way down her neck, across her collarbone, over the swell of her breasts and up to the top edge of her bra. It felt wonderful, and exciting - God, she loved his mouth - but it didn't feel like too much. It felt like just enough. His lips were warm on her skin, and not too wet, and she barely had time to even start worrying that she wasn't doing enough for him between the soft moans and muttered curses that he kept letting out in a low, gravelly voice. His hands slid up and down her back, down her arms, back up and over her breasts again, behind her neck and into her hair. His body was comfortable against hers, his skin lighting up her skin with happy warmth.
---
She couldn't have said how long they went on like that. Time seemed to flow loosely in a haze of happiness and sensation and feeling more relaxed than she ever thought she would, given the situation. It helped that Levi was being a perfect gentleman, not taking one inch more than she had explicitly given him. Her bra stayed in place, and his hands stayed well away from her hips. Her hands, for their part, stayed on his arms and chest and back, because touching him there felt good and right.
For once, the inside of her head felt like a comfortable place to be. She contemplated going further and decided she didn’t want to, and even that decision felt safe. Here, in this moment, she trusted Levi completely. “Everything you want and nothing you don’t,” she heard his voice say inside her head, and sighed happily.
"Someday, though," she thought as his kisses started to come further and further apart, "I think I'd like to try other things. Someday soon, probably. Tomorrow, even." She'd always thought of courage as a finite resource, but in this case, it turned out that it replenished even stronger than before.
Levi snuggled close, resting his head on her shoulder and wrapping his long limbs around her.
"Good?" he asked, his voice warm.
Cath held him close. "The best."