Archive of Our Own

To be fair, it was one of Judai’s better ideas.

Yubel looked themselves over in the mirror, stretching their limbs that felt so unfamiliar and picking at the clothes their beloved had lovingly chosen for this little adventure. Judai and Yubel didn’t switch bodies often, but Judai had insisted that they go out using his body, citing that the two of them needed personal time without his intervention. They missed their wings, both for the familiarity and the ability to hide themselves from the world. Judai mentioned something about how they should be pushing past their comfort zone. Yubel thought that turning into a monstrous dragon should qualify as going far beyond anyone’s comfort zone, but once Judai gets an idea in his head, it was hard to talk him out of it.

A knock at the door tore Yubel out of their thoughts. “Okay, ready to go? My phone says that the weather is supposedly perfect for something like this.”

“I’ll be out in a minute.” They picked up the sunglasses and Judai’s favorite green bag from the desk and opened the door. On the other side was Johan Andersen who looked as thrilled as them for this. Yubel had to give him credit though; he looked like he was willing to give this a try.

“Ready to go?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Yubel answered. They tilted their head when they saw Johan’s feature flinch. “Problem?”

“Sorry, is there any way you can talk without using his voice?” Johan asked. Yubel didn’t have to ask what was so triggering of the way they talked.

Yubel thought about this. They summoned energy and focused it directly on their voice box, and said, “How about this?” Their voice was higher pitch than Judai’s but was more of a mixture of the two voices than anything else. It was the first time that anyone other than Judai looked more relieved that Yubel resembled more like themselves than Judai.

“Better,” Johan said and gestured for them to walk to the door.

“Remember, all we have to do is reach the peak. Then we can be free,” Yubel assured.

“You act like you don’t want to be around my winning personality,” Johan joked.

“Judai would be crushed if he knew that he was the only one of us three with a loser personality,” Yubel replied. Johan laughed and guided them to the bus stop. The bus would drop them off at the closest mountain where the two of them would go on a big hike and talk about feelings or whatever. Then, in Judai’s mind, the three of them would be a happy throuple – a new word that Asuka had to teach the three of them when they all came out. The situation between the three of them must have been truly dire if Judai had picked up on it.

To be fair, it was still one of his better ideas.

Domino Mountain was a popular attraction for locals to enjoy. Though Domino City was known for its dueling scene and for young game design graduates to make their mark in Kaiba Corp, there were still a number of non-duelists who also needed some entertainment. The mountain was verdant, covered with luscious flora with just hints of some human intervention when creating paths. As they left the bus, Yubel almost whistled at seeing the sight. The mountain was a beauty.

At the base of the mountain was a bulletin board listing the trails and their difficulties along with screaming children who were excited to go on an adventure, and street vendors selling exhortingly expensive waters and sweets. Yubel also noticed that there were a lot of couples standing around, taking photos, and wearing matching hiking gear. They took notice that Johan was wearing a blue sweater that clashed perfectly with Judai’s green jacket and black swaeter. They breathed a sigh of relief.

Johan examined the map in hand and pointed at a partially paved path trailing into the deep undergrowth of the mountain. It seemed to be one of the less popular trails as many of the couples seem to be heading in a different direction. “I think that’s the start of the trail Judai recommended to us. He said that it had the best view of the city if we make it to the top.”

“When we make it to the top,” Yubel corrected. “We both made a promise that we’d do this, and I won’t have you make a liar of me today.” Johan smiled and bumped his shoulder against theirs.

“If you’re listening Judai, I won’t be backing down from this challenge either.” Yubel didn’t have to tell Johan that Judai had firmly stated that he was not going to intervene in this supposedly important conversation that Johan and Yubel were supposed to have on this life-changing hike. Though, they were grateful that at least Johan was good at making conversation. He must have been very popular when he was still a student at Duel Academy.

Yubel looked over to the trail and sighed. They could admit that it was partially their fault that they were doing this at all. Ever since Judai had told them that they were romantically interested in Johan as well, Yubel had acted cold and recluse in their shared soul. They refused to come out when Johan and Judai were spending time together, made snide remarks when Johan did something unappealing, and was a wretched soul to be around after the two of them parted.

Johan was a perfectly fine individual, and there was a reason Yubel chose to take on his form rather than sap his energy and leave the body to die in the wastelands. He was frustratingly a good partner, and he treated Judai well. The two of them shared the same hobbies, had generally the same demeanor, and Judai always lingered at the door when it was time for him to jump dimensions.

Judai had told the two of them that he didn’t expect them to be romantically involved, but if they wanted to make this relationship work, they needed to at least understand each other. Yubel, if they hadn’t been reprimanded at that moment, would have been proud of Judai’s emotional maturity on this matter.

For he loved them both so much, and he would have loved to be able to love them at the same time. Yubel’s cruelty did not extend so far as to make Judai choose one heart over the other.

They looked over to Johan with a determined expression and walked forward.

For Judai.

“So I looked online for some questions. I know this isn’t really supposed to be a date, but I figured that they would at least be good starting points, you know?” Johan suggested. The trail advertised it was a 10 mile back and forth trek through the woods and mountains with moderate difficulty. Judai must have been forced to become an outdoors child after his memory surgery because there was nothing Yubel could have done to get him out of the house. They wondered how often and with who Judai walked these very steps.

“If you’re comfortable with it,” Yubel answered. Despite inhabiting Johan’s body for some time in the Dark World and being the soul mate of his boyfriend, Yubel didn’t really know much about Johan. There were things that Judai liked about him, and there were things that Yubel observed about him when the two of them were on their dates, but like Judai, he didn’t talk too much of his past. Both of them, Judai and Joahn, were two people that very much lived in the present tense.

“Okay! So first one: ‘What’s your favorite meal?’ Oh, I guess that you don’t really eat. Um, let’s see, “What’s your ideal weekend?” I guess that doesn’t really matter because you guys are on the move. Hold on, there has to be something on this list…”

“What about you?” Yubel asked instead.

Johan looked up from frantically scrolling on his phone. “Me?”  

“Yes, what’s your favorite food? I know that you let Judai pick every time because he’s so rarely in this dimension, but you cannot tell me that you prefer to eat fried shrimp for every meal,” Yubel asked.

“Ah, you caught me,” Johan laughed sheepishly. “I honestly don’t mind Japanese food – ramen and tempura is great! But I can’t say that it’s my absolute favorite.”

“We visited Sweden a couple of times, I believe. We couldn’t believe how cold it was up there and how long the sun managed to stay in the sky.”

“That’s not too far from where I’m from!”

“Norway, right?”

“You remembered!” Johan exclaimed with a smile. He had a good smile, Yubel noticed. It held such a gentle warmth to the person it was extended to. Johan was a good type of person who made it easy to get along with. He had these smiles that if you didn’t know him made you feel welcome to the conversation. That was the expression that Johan was sharing with them now. It seemed like he only reserved his quiet, genuine smiles for when Judai wasn’t looking.

Kind of humorous the more they thought about it.

“Back home, we had something called a Koldtbord – it’s kind of like a buffet of a ton of food served for parties and stuff. I remember Linn would get up pretty early to set up the table for Christmas. It was always a hit with the relatives,” Johan explained, kicking a rock at the path.

Yubel tilted their head. Typically, when people talked about their most treasured memories from childhood, they would smile warmly at the nostalgia. Johan still wore his masked smile. They didn’t mention it.

“Back in our previous lives, Judai would order me to steal peaches for him from local farmers. They were the same peaches that were delivered to the royal kitchens, but Judai insisted that they tasted better because I had stolen them just for him,” Yubel reminisced, almost able to taste the succulent fruit from so many years ago. They could almost hear Judai’s laugh ring in their ears as he excitedly took the basket of stolen fruit from them.

“That little klepto! That does sound like him. I’m sure that if you weren’t around, he would dine and dash all the time!” Johan joked and then looked at them with curious eyes. “Would you tell me more about your life before this one? I know that there are probably some tragic parts that you guys will want to keep to yourselves, but if there are any stories like the one you just shared, I’d like to hear it.”

Judai knew that his relationship with Yubel seemed fictious to some of his other friends. After all, most of them hardly realized the duel sprits existed and believed Judai’s conversations of them were just a part of his already expansive imagination. They knew that Judai carried immense dueling energy within him, but what that meant in a scientific sense was unknown. Even Yubel couldn’t really quantify what is all meant, to be quite honest. Regardless, Yubel secretly relished the fact that their relationship was just between the two of them. They still carried that small sense of selfishness within them. This was something private and unknown to the rest of the world, and it was something Yubel, a duel spirit with hardly a physical body, could say they own.

The idea of sharing that little bit of themselves with another person terrified them. They could take it and ruin it. They could take it for themselves. It was scary showing a side of themselves to someone they had hurt so badly. Would Johan shield themselves away at the scarier parts of Yubel that even Judai was ashamed to share?

Yubel bit their lip. “Could I think about it for a little bit?”

Johan looked back at them and smiled, a genuine smile. Yubel wondered for a second if this was the first time Johan allowed this part of himself be seen by someone else.

“Of course,” he said and continued on the trail.

“Boy, who let Judai walk this trail alone? There’s hardly any people on this side of the mountain,” Johan amazed, pushing branches aside Yubel to walk through.

It was true, if not eerily convenient. If this path truly led to a part of a breathtaking view of Domino City, surely more tourists would be walking up and down the path. Yubel vaguely wondered if this was one of Judai’s inane shenanigans, but then again, Judai going on an empty trail by himself in absence of other strangers seemed entirely in character for him.

Johan gestured to a convenient pile of rocks to the side. “Do you mind if we take a rest? I want to just check in with the family and make sure they get a chance to stretch out.” Yubel nodded in agreement, happy to rest their feet from the mostly steep incline they’ve been traveling. To themselves, their mourn the loss of their wings and ability to float in this world.

Yubel actively chose a seat far away from Johan, pretending to observe the native foliage. They must have been doing a pretty good job acting because Johan did not say anything, and Yubel absolutely hated looking at leaves.

“All right guys, come on out! Ah, don’t say that, Amethyst. Yubel and I have been having a great time on this hike, wouldn’t you say Yubel?”

“It’s has been a pleasant time.”

“See! Now come on out – Topaz, you’ve been complaining about being locked up for the longest, so I know that you want to come out,” Johan urged.

“If it would be better, I can move on ahead,” Yubel suggested.

“No!” Johan said, a little too quickly. “I mean, I want you to meet the family. If Judai is doing all of this so we could be better friends, I want you guys to also meet my family!”

“And we’re not going to let Johan out of our sights one bit during this little excursion,” Sapphire said, emerging from his card and using a wing to overshadow Johan.

“Yes. Try anything funny fiend, and we’ll be the first one to attack,” Emerald squeaked, still hiding in his shell that made the delivery of the line a little half-assed. Yubel placed a hand on their hip, unimpressed.

“And how do you propose on doing that, turtle?” Yubel wished they could bite back their words. They were supposed to be developing a relationship and directly insulting Johan’s family was a guaranteed way to get on the boy’s bad side.

“Hey guys, we’re not supposed to be arguing. Just come on out and do your stretches. Yubel and I still have a few more miles to go on this trail, and it would be great if we could make it back to the buses with the sun still in the sky.”

“Why are you taking their side, Johan? You can’t ask us to forgive them for what they did to both you and us all those years ago. I haven’t heard a single apology from their side for their actions,” Cobalt screeched.  

“Guys, we’ve talked about this. Yubel is better now, and they weren’t in their right mind when all of that happened. They’ve changed since then. Shouldn’t we at least try and give them a chance?”

That was the last thing that Yubel heard before they took off, thanking Judai for being a master at unnoticed departures. They were swift through the path, thankful that the path they had taken was empty. They didn’t cry – they haven’t since their reunification with their other half. However, parts of them felt both pierced and defensive at their words.

Did Yubel even have a right to feel like such a way though? The spirits weren’t wrong, and truly, how much can someone change when at the core, they were a monster. Despite Judai’s influence, the light of creation still lingered at the edges of their mind. It was a tempting and tantalizing thing, the desire to take Judai far away from here, away from his friends who didn’t completely understand him, away from the other soul he found comfort in, and keep him for themselves. Feelings like that don’t disappear after a few years of constant, healthy love, and Yubel worried that it would only take a moment of weakness for them to fall prey to the Light’s persuasion.

They stopped at a bench highlighting the halfway point in their hike and sat down. Here they were, inhabiting the body of their beloved, ridiculed by the only other person who could see them. They could almost laugh – they were almost halfway through their dastardly plan.

Yubel took a moment to look at the hands they know possessed. Like the young king that Haou was, Judai’s hands were soft, unknowing of any hard work. Though he traversed through many dangers, he was a general, and it was dogs like Yubel that did the dirty work. None of them spited Judai for that though – Yubel, Neos, all of them were happy to keep their ward’s hands clean as they worked to protect the dimensions from harm.

The temptation to draw Judai’s card out was strong. Judai had made Yubel promise to only draw him out in cases of emergencies, but certainly this counted as one. They sighed. They knew they were being ridiculous, and when did they ever care what other people thought of them.

But a part of them did care: there was a sense of validation of being seen by others. Judai knew that Yubel had changed, but Judai was another part of them. To be witnessed by Judai’s other friends, to be acknowledged that the love between them was more than just a joining of soul, to know that is real was powerful. Yubel had spent years in the void of space thinking about their love for Judai that it no longer felt grounded in the real world. Yubel did not want the love to become obsessive, but for that to happen, it had to be seen by others. Without it, what did it mean to love another?

Something chirped beside them, and they shook themselves out of their thoughts.

“Ruby, Ruby!” Ruby Carbuncle cheered. Yubel scoffed. They guessed that they didn’t disgust the entire family.

“Have I won your approval then?” Yubel asked.

Ruby didn’t answer, but Yubel supposed that was a good enough response as any.

“There you are!” Johan was jogging up the trail. “Did Judai learn to suddenly disappear from you, or did you learn from him. It’s a very annoying habit, I have to say.”

“We used to have a habit of sneaking out of very important meetings in our past lives,” Yubel answered.

Johan stopped in front of them and nearly keeled over to catch his breath. “Thought you got lost or something, or worse.”

“Judai knows to always let you know before he leaves,” Yubel said. “Your family might think otherwise, but I am always someone that keeps to promises.” They had millenniums of evidence to back that up.

“That’s not what I meant. And I’m sorry about everyone. It was too soon, but I figured if they saw you like you were now, and-“

“It’s fine.” Yubel said and stood up, careful to avoid both Ruby and Johan. “Are you fine to continue? Or do you need a minute?”

“Wait, everyone has something to say to you.” Yubel did not want to hear empty apologies and promises, especially for someone as undeserving as them. They shook their head and watched as Ruby ran up Johan’s leg and onto his shoulder. Scarlet and glimmering eyes watched their every move.

“It’s okay Johan. They’re right, and I’m still atoning for everything I did. No one has to say anything. I supposed that everyone was able to stretch out for a minute or two?”

Johan watched Yubel with a guarded expression and never did Yubel feel so raw by a stare. “Yeah, everyone was able to get out what they wanted to say in the end.”

“Excellent. We’re about halfway through, and the sun is at its midpoint. We should get going if we want to make it to the top.” Yubel turned and walked onto the trail. They held their breath until they could hear the crunch of dead leaves echoing Yubel’s steps.

The second half of their journey was much quieter than the first half. Johan didn’t offer any inane insight, and Yubel picked up the pace so that they would reach their destination sooner. The silence between them was heavy, and Yubel wasn’t so socialized that they knew what to do in this situation. Unfortunately, it didn’t seem like Johan did either. He was constantly looking for an opening for a conversation, but Yubel’s demeanor didn’t make the task easy.

They sighed. They knew they needed to say something, just to break the ice. While Yubel could admit that the bonding part of this exercise was probably going to happen another day, it didn’t mean that the two of them had to spend another few hours in silence.

“How did you like Duel Academy North?” Yubel finally asked, drawing on the few lines of questioning that Yubel didn’t already have the answer to.

“It was alright I guess,” Johan answered, kicking to the side. “I much prefer Duel Academy Central, but North has its own charms. I’m not too sure how much you know from Jun, but there’s a real focus ‘survival of the fittest.’ You have do an entire gauntlet with every student to figure out your ranking, and there were some students who were really into that kind of thing, but it never really clicked with me.”

“Yes, that does seem very antithetical to your persona.”

Johan laughed. “Persona? Do you think I’m putting on a pretty face?”

Yubel looked to the side, for the first time really observing Johan in the scattered sunlight peeking through the trees. His eyes matched the verdant greenery around them, and it highlighted his already pale features. He wore a soft-looking t-shirt and loose-fitting jeans that still hugged around his hips. Yubel thought he would have been very popular at school. They told them this, but Johan laughed as an answer.

“I never really had time for a relationship. I was only really at Duel Academy North between pro league duels, and that was mostly because my agent made me. He said that if I wanted to get sponsored, I needed to get a degree from a Duel Academy. I needed the money, so I enrolled at Duel Academy North and attended classes virtually if I was away at a tournament.”

“A hard worker at such a young age. Well, at least Judai has good taste,” Yubel joked.

“Well, what about Judai? I’m sure plenty of people were falling over him as well.”

“Judai is oblivious to any form of romantic attraction until it hits him over the head, multiple times. While we were away on one of our adventures, he had asked me what a fiancée meant. I wasn’t even of this world, and I had gathered the definition based on context clues.”

Johan laughed, hitting his knee as Yubel explained the story. “That does sound like Judai. It’s a wonder that he even realized I had the biggest crush at him from the moment I met him.”

“I told him that, and he didn’t believe me. He spent quite a long time wandering in a desert trying to read into signs that implied that you only saw him as a friend rather than a romantic interest. It was quite the miracle that we met up with you in Paris that he finally realized your feelings as well.”

“Then he disappeared again.”

“Judai is very bad with expressing his emotions.”

“I must have texted at least three of my friends the night he left me in Paris if I was being led on.”

Another silence fell upon them, but it felt softer than the previous one. Yubel scoffed softly. Of course, the one thing that could break the ice was the object of their affection and the whole reason why they were on this adventure in the first place. Their hand automatically came to rest on the deck of cards that rested on their waist, feeling the warmth of Judai’s spirit radiate from the card. They wondered just truly how much they were ignorant of the outside world like this.

“So no relationships,” Yubel started again. “But friendships? Seems to me that you were very popular.”

“It’s nothing like that. They were just some friends I made on the dueling circuit, but I wouldn’t say that I’m particularly close to anyone. It’s kind of hard to be when you go around telling everyone that my card spirits are my actual family.”

Yubel knew the feeling. The isolation that Judai went through in his childhood, insisting that Yubel was real was painful to watch, even if it appealed to some of Yubel’s more possessive side. Even Judai’s parents had chalked it up to his imagination that he would eventually grow out of. It seemed that Judai and Johan had at least that in common.

“Is that why you fell for Judai?” Yubel asked.

Johan didn’t answer at first, continuing to kick another rock along the path. Yubel wondered if this is how other people in their situation talked. They were never one for small talk, but maybe something lighter would have been more appropriate.

No. As Judai would put it, it wouldn’t be authentic.

“Judai was the first person who really understood me when I told him that the Gem Beasts were my family and not just humor me. For a long time, I had thought that the Gem Beasts were just a figment of my imagination, something that my brain thought up to keep the loneliness at bay. But then, the more and more I got to know them, I began to realize that I don’t need other people to understand for it to be real. That’s how I began noticing other people had duel spirits around them too.

“Even though I didn’t need to be validated in what I knew was true, Judai truly made me feel not alone in my experience. Not only that, he didn’t seem to care that his friends couldn’t see Duel Spirits. He wasn’t even hiding it! When I first met him, I truly couldn’t believe that there could be someone like me in this world.”

Johan stopped for a second to take in the world around him. Yubel paused as well and look back. Single tears drifted down Johan’s face. As Yubel reached in their bag for tissue, Johan shook his head and wiped his face with his arm. Even after reassuring Yubel that he was fine, he finally relented and took a tissue. He stuffed the waste in his pocket and shook his head.

“I always told everyone that I didn’t need close friends. I had my family, and that was enough. But to have someone to hold, to touch, to feel the warm breath of, and tell me that they understood the world the same way I did, it was life changing Yubel. The Gem Beasts, they’re a part of me. Judai is separate from all that I know, and the fact that we align feels like having a part of me extended, and how could I not fall in love? Isn’t love just the feeling of being seen?”

The two of them sat down on a fallen tree as Johan regained his composure. He insisted that he was fine, but Yubel didn’t mind sitting on some log while they thought about his words. As Johan cleaned his face, Yubel looked down at their hands, the hands they borrowed from the one they loved. Judai was an extension of themselves, and vice versa.

As Yubel looked over to the crying teenager to their side, who held himself proudly and never looked back to the past, Yubel wondered for the first time, could Yubel be an extension of Johan as well?

Yubel was going to scream at Judai’s parents the next time they saw them.

They reached a dead end, or it would be a dead end for normal people. Their favorite idiot would have the bright idea of climbing this rock face. To be fair, it wasn’t very tall, and there were some very obvious hand holds that made the climb less intimidating than it would seem at first glance. Regardless, it didn’t mean that an ambitious ten year old should be climbing such a thing. It was also ridiculous to send your two loved one on a wild goose chase.

“This view better be worth it,” Yubel muttered and touched the stone. They sorely missed their wings, but they supposed it would good practice to get used to this body in case they were in a situation where Yubel couldn’t just fly them and Judai up.

“Do you want me to go first? I can give you a hand from the top,” Johan offered.

“No, I should be fine, but thank you,” Yubel replied and started ascending. Like they observed, it was an easy enough climb, and Judai’s physicality made it an easier job than probably normal. Johan gave an appreciative whistle when they made it to the top.

“Nothing like seeing my boyfriend strut his stuff like that,” Joahn joked and started climbing the cliff himself.

The comment made Yubel blush, and they fanned themselves to hide the incriminating evidence. Even if it was Judai’s body they were using, Yubel was still unused to comments like that. Only Judai had ever called them beautiful, and it was only in sweet poetic verses that Judai must’ve picked up in a book or a movie. To be perceived like this was a little much.

When Johan managed to climb up the cliff, they lent a hand to help him over the edge. His hand was warm and soft, unlike Yubel’s scaled claws. They intrusively wondered if Judai had a preference on which hand held him at night.

A story danced on Yubel’s tongue as they continued on the trail. They’ve known Johan for a few months now, the relationship between him and Judai was still fresh. Hell, they’ve only known Judai as the person he is now for only a few years, despite the long history they shared. Yubel had spent centuries alone, waiting for the king to finally be reborn. Their story of why they looked like this only known by two people in this world still. That was fine. It was okay.

Now Yubel wanted to tell Johan.

Yubel shied away from being seen, preferring to work in the background while the other half of their soul did the bothersome work of talking and playing nice with others. They exceled at being Judai’s dog: protecting him from dangerous threats and intimidating those who dare oppose his rule. It wasn’t a dog’s duty to tell people how their teeth got so sharp or their bark so ferocious.

“You look like you got something to say,” Joahn interrupted their thoughts. Yubel didn’t even realized how long they were being silent for. They scowled. This was exactly the kind of behavior that Yubel scolded Judai for all the time. Perhaps they were spending a little too much time with each other.

“Has Judai ever told you the story of why I look like the way that I normally do?” they asked.

“No,” Johan shook his head. “To be honest, I didn’t even realize that there was a story. I thought that you were always who you were.”

“Nothing this monstrous but maintaining any illusion of consciousness could be born naturally,” Yubel retorted and sighed. It was a difficult story to tell. They could still feel the knives and cuts the surgeons made when they were operating on them, despite the lifetimes that have passed. Even though the sight of them was enough to make some duel spirits cower in fear, Judai had been the one person to compliment on their beauty – to make them feel as though the operation was not for nothing, that even though they were a monster, they were still worth something to someone.

“They told me that Haou would need a protector. That is the story of how I tied my life to Judai,” Yubel answered.

“Was it painful?” Johan asked.

“Immensely. The king at the time had warned me that any have died on the operating table during the procedure because the pain was too much for them to bear. However, at the time, I would have done anything for Haou, and I will continue to do anything for Judai.”

Johan bit his lip, a pause in the conversation as if it was trying to protect Yubel from something. “What is it?” they asked.

“This may come out as rude, but do you think you would have loved Judai if your life wasn’t tied to him in this way?”

Yubel turned the word around in their head. For them, they counted the seconds of life as time with and time without Judai. All of their thoughts centered on this idiot, and they honestly wouldn’t have had it any other way. Even in their human form, Haou was their ward and then spent hours in each other’s company. Yubel didn’t really think they had any spare time away from the Supreme King. To think of a life outside of Judai was unthinkable really, and it made Yubel shudder to think what would happen to him if they weren’t there to protect and guide him.

“I don’t think I would be the same person without Judai.”

“Doesn’t that scare you?” Does the thought that if Judai were to leave his mortal self once more, leaving Yubel alone and wandering around the Earth until they could reunite scare them? Perhaps before, they would have said yes. The thought of being separated from Judai, the thought that their best friend could also be alone in this too big world, was once an unbearable idea. But now, with their soul healed and their mind healing as fast as it could, the thought, though painful, was a mere thought.

“You know us, we’re never people who live in the what-if’s,” Yubel answered. Then asked, “Does it scare you?”

Johan hummed. “I think it scared me a little bit in the beginning. I was never someone people really stuck around – too weird, too authentic, too much really. The fact that someone saw me and accepted me for who I was and who I called my family, it was hard not to fall in love and fall hard for him. And Judai changed me, and I’ve never been someone who was big into change. It was scary.

“I don’t think the change was for the better because I was already a pretty okay guy, I think. But I think Judai changed my life to be more exciting, and isn’t that enough for someone like me?”

Yubel laughed. Johan was normal the same way Yubel was. Normal Johan who set out on adventures fighting Duel Poachers and winning Duel Monster tournaments without his ace card like it was nothing. Johan wanted nothing more than a home that would accept him as the person he was rather than the person he pretended to be. Johan gave his heart to a man of mystery that by very nature could not stay in a single place for too long. Johan was also willing to share a part of his heart with a monster who sacrificed everything for the man they both loved together. In what world did Johan believe that he was anything less than extraordinary?

“You’re very funny,” Yubel laughed again.

“It’s one of my better traits,” Johan agreed, joining in.

 Judai had parents, though they were fully absent by the time he turned eighteen. They moved abroad but left their home in Domino City for him for whatever he planned to do after attending Duel Academy. They hadn’t bothered to ask where their son disappeared to during the year Yubel and Judai traversed the dimensions after their duel together. Yubel would never tell this to Judai, but they believed the only reason why they bothered sending Judai to get his memory cleaned was to stop him from screaming in the middle of the night.

Judai assured them that they were good parents, and Yubel was thankful that they allowed Judai to do whatever he wanted to do. However, they did wish they were just a little more present.

“What is your family like?” Yubel asked. The question was dancing on their tongue for a while now. Most of Judai’s friends had family to speak of: overbearing older brothers, fiery father figures, and Misawa. But Johan never spoke of his human family, and he must have someone in his life to go back home to.

“Well, they’re not the biggest fan of you,” Johan started, obviously dodging the question. Yubel hesitated. Normally they would eschew social norms and get to the heart of the matter, but they were becoming friends, and shouldn’t friends respect each other’s boundaries?

They possessed his body a few years ago, they supposed. Boundaries were meant to be crossed in the name of bonds.

“Your human family, I mean.”

Johan sighed, and Yubel tensed. “You don’t need to, if you don’t want to.”

“No, no, it’s fine. I’m so insistent that the Gem Beasts are my real family, that normally, people don’t really push on my actual folks,” Johan sighed. “It’s kind of a sore point.”

Yubel didn’t know what to say to that. They didn’t know Johan well enough to push to allow him to say what he probably wants to share, or to let it go to allow Johan to bring up the point himself. If he was anything like Judai, Yubel leave the mortal plane before knowing anything about Johan’s family.

But in a surprise, Johan sighed again and looked away toward the cityscape. They had made considerable distance and victory danced on their tongues as they were nearing the peak. Domino City was gorgeous in the falling sun, and if they looked closely, they could see the figures of salarymen rushing home, families on outings for the evening, and teens enjoying the few hours they get out of studying every day. “My family disowned me the year I got accepted at Duel Academy North. I haven’t spoken to them since that day.”

Yubel thinks back to their own parents, entire lifetimes ago. They remembered how proud they were of a child being accepted into the royal retinue. No one had told them that it meant a lifetime of servitude to the burgeoning prince. They don’t recall ever seeing their family ever after the surgery, not that they would ever want to show them this face.

“Was it because of who you liked, or…” Yubel trailed off, unsure what about Johan would make someone throw such a bright soul away. Johan just laughed and shook his head.

“If only it was something as benign like that,” Johan sighed again. “They didn’t really understand that I could see Duel Sprits. Duel Monsters wasn’t really that big where I was from. The fad would come in waves, especially when one of the bests like Jounouchi or Kaiba were having a European league. When it was really popular, I could hardly focus on class. How could you when the monsters you look up to and admire were so close to you?

“I would stay in from recess and just talk to all of them. Their owners were snot-nosed kids who hardly knew the importance of their cards, and they would throw them into their closets once the European league was finished. My teachers alerted my parents, and my parents threw my cards in one of the closest fountains.” He closed his fists in anger before taking a deep breath and looked at Yubel. “I cried that day. I still cry about if I think it too much. I apologized to the spirits, but the cards were ruined, and their connection to this world was severed. I never had the heart to pick out their cards from card shops again, because I was – am – worried that they would never forgive me.”

“You were a child.”

“I’m still a child,” Johan reminded them. “You and Judai travel across dimensions saving Duel Spirits, and Judai is hardly twenty years old! Judai even got the chance to send you to space to save you. I could have done more, should have.”

“Johan,” Yubel said, their hands resting on Johan’s shoulders. “You have to believe me when I say this: you were a child.”

Yubel couldn’t count the number of times Judai was left alone in the classroom for saying he could see Yubel, or how Yubel was their best friend. How horrid when a person bravely wanted to Judai’s friend, that same best friend would rip them from Judai’s life. How that same best friend later returned to this planet to take the one joy that Judai had in life.

Children cannot be held responsible for how they see the world; it’s a beautiful gift to have that world shared with adults. Judai took a year to go back to seeing the world as he once did as a child, but he’s still growing with the too adult responsibility on his shoulders, stunting his once brilliant growth. Judai was lucky: he had a faithful dog to guide his steps. The Crystal Beasts were not in Johan’s life until much later.

Yubel looked at Johan, their heterochrome eyes catching Johan’s sea green ones. Yubel’s heart sang for this boy who only wanted to do what was right. “You were a child, and the people who were supposed to protect you failed you. I am so sorry.”

Johan fell into Yubel’s arms, and Yubel allowed him to stay there for as long as he needed. They buried their face into Johan’s hair but caught sight of spectral visions appearing in the outskirts of the forest. The Crystal Beasts stood in a line watching the two of them in each other’s arms. Topaz stepped forward, his teeth bared but Sapphire spread his wings to prevent him from encroaching. The Pegasus turned his attention back to Yubel and gave a single nod.

Yubel might not have been their favorite person, and there was still a long road to atonement ahead. However, Yubel now understands that their true role in life is to be a protector. Like it or not, Johan has also come under their protection, and Yubel will be damned if anyone causes this boy the same amount of pain his parents gave him.

Johan hiccupped as his tears stopped and reached in his bag for a towel. “You have to promise that you won’t tell Judai. I don’t want him to know about it, not yet at least. I want him to be the one to ask, if that’s okay with you.” Johan said, taking notice that his family was also watching him. “Ah jeez guys, you didn’t need to come out for something like this.”

The family all began screaming assurances as Johan joined in for a group family hug. Yubel scoffed at the gesture but was glad that Johan seemed to find himself with his true family again. They made a note that if they were ever in Norway again, Yubel would have to ask for possession of Judai’s body.

A child’s tears are too salty to grace the Earth with.

“We’re finally here! Jeez, what a hike,” Johan complained as he helped Yubel up the final few steps. Turns out, the last leg of the hike was a complete vertical climb, and Yubel would not be lying that they were tempted to make Judai do this part. All the emotional and physical labor was beginning to tire them out, and they so desperately wanted their wings back. They have never traded bodies for this long before, and they could start to feel the flesh separate from the spirit.

“Remind me to NOT remind Judai to stretch. I want to make sure this boy feels the full aftermath of what he made us do today,” Yubel grumbled. They did feel pity for Johan who didn’t have a spirit to trade spaces with. Ah well, it wasn’t as if Judai had any plans to leave any time soon.

“Whoa! Look at this view! Judai wasn’t kidding that it was to kill for!” It was a nice view. The sun was falling against the landscape, hitting the water surrounding Domino City perfectly. Yubel could imagine Judai spending many days here just listening to the earth and sky, configuring his deck, and imagining his future in Duel Academy.

Too bad for Yubel that they believed all sunsets looked the same.

Johan laughed as they looked back at them. “Not stunning enough for you? I’m sure you’ve probably saw a lot of things up in space.”

“Eh, once you’ve seen a sunset, you’ve seen them all, in my opinion,” Yubel relented and sat down on the floor.

“Well, before you switch back with Judai, let me say one thing to you,” Johan said and sat down next to them. “I’ve never been in a relationship like this before, but I’m glad that my partner’s partner is as cool as you. Maybe one day we’ll actually like each other.”

Yubel looked at this boy was sea green eyes and hair with the color of the sky, and for the first time, wonder if this is what Judai saw when he first fell for this boy. This kind boy who has been salted by the world but still remain sweet. A boy who attracts all the right attention but desires none of it. A boy who by all standards should be bitter but remains a light. His face is close, and they can smell the sweat and exertion on him. It smells nice.

They kiss him. But unlike Judai, they don’t run away immediately.

“Maybe one day,” they teased and pulls out Judai’s card at their belt. The switch is almost instant. A deep breath in in Judai’s lungs and then a deep yawn out in Yubel’s semi-physical body. Judai must have gotten enough sleep to last him an entire month. The stretch out their wings and stand to Judai who is struggling to sit up straight.

“Ah jeez Yubel. Warn a guy before you’re about to do it,” Judai complained. “Ah! Johan! You’re really close to me!” Yubel’s true love was truly the most embarrassing person alive.

Johan, who seemed to be still reeling from the kiss, shook to attention and saw that Yubel and Judai had switched to their normal forms. He glanced at Yubel, who in turn hushed them with a wink. Johan and Yubel still had a lot to work on, both on a personal but also an interpersonal level. If they were lucky, they will get a full lifetime to do it. The kiss was a promise on trying their best.

Johan was a good kid, and Yubel hoped one day, he would trust them with his heart too.

“Oh, ah! Whoops sorry! Here, let me get out of the way.”

“No, it’s fine!”

“You mean it’s fine that I’m leaning against you with a mountain of sweat on my back.”

“I mean, no, but also yes? Is that weird?”

“I don’t think so! Unless you do? I mean, I guess it can be kind of weird, but I’m okay with it if you are.”

Yubel was tragically attracted to idiots.