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“Just don’t look at anyone, dude!” Mike groaned at Dustin’s voice, hunching over to press his palms against his eyes.
“Yeah, no shit! What do you think I’ve been doing?” he grit out. That was all he had been doing for hours, ever since the incident with Nancy that morning.
Mike had woken up already tired from a night of rough sleep and odd dreams. He had stumbled his way out of bed at the last possible second in order to have some cereal and still be on time for the group’s pre-crawl meet up, when he had quite literally bumped into Nancy making her way out of the kitchen.
It was right as he squinted his bleary eyes open to glare at her that it happened.
If you’re so smart, then tell me
why are you still so afraid?
They had both swung around at the sudden loud music, easily startled and full of adrenaline as they always were these days. The music had cut out as quickly as it had started.
“What the fuck,” Mike said under his breath. What was that? Was Holly playing music in her room? Except it hadn’t sounded muffled, more like it was coming from a speaker right next to them. He glanced back at Nancy, noticing that she looked as tired as he felt.
Slow down, you’re doing fine.
You can’t be everything you wanna be before your time
She tilted her head thoughtfully as he stared at her; like she was researching a new story, and he was the last piece.
“What?” He snapped, trying to be heard over the loud music.
“Close your eyes,” she ordered with an odd look in her eyes.
“What? Why?” This was stupid.
“Just do it.” Nancy was stupid.
“Fine!” He closed his eyes. The music cut off. “Happy?”
“Now open them,” she said. He crossed his arms as a sinking feeling came over him.
“No,” he said, turning away from her. He didn’t know why he had a sudden problem with this, but he knew this music was a bad sign.
“Mike,” she said. Her voice was softer, which should have made him feel better, but it only made it worse.
“Don’t be condescending!” He snapped.
“Then don’t be stubborn!” Nancy snapped back at him. Mike groaned again. He just had to get it over with.
“Fine.” He swung his arms down by his side as he spun around to face her and finally opened his eyes to look at her.
You got your passion, you got your pride,
but don’t you know that only fools are satisfied
Dream on, but don’t imagine they’ll all come true
Shit. He was going to need a lot of cereal for this.
He was still carrying his overflowing bowl when Nancy had dropped him off at the Squawk. He had radioed Lucas and Dustin on the way over and they sat with him as he hunched over his breakfast, refusing to look up. They were to wait there as Nancy rushed off to rally the rest of the troupes. They were comforting even though they were giving him shit.
“It’s not that bad,” Lucas hedged.
“Yeah!” Dustin joined in. “You could be our own personal Walkman if we get a Vecna situation.” Mike set his empty bowl down next to him and reached into his bag, carefully avoiding looking at either of the others.
“I mean,” Dustin continued. “How does it work, exactly? Does it only work for certain people? Do you pick the song? What were you thinking about when it happened with your sister? Did you try it with anyone else?”
“Oh my god, shut up!” Mike exclaimed. He pulled out a long scarf, borrowed from Nancy on the way over, and wrapped it around his eyes like a blindfold.
“Dude,” Lucas said sounding surprised.
“Hardcore,” Dustin agreed. Mike tied the scarf tightly and double knotted it at the back of his head. It wasn’t going anywhere.
“I’m not looking at anyone until this is over,” Mike said. “Nancy was bad enough.”
“Aw, no fair,” Dustin whined. “I wanna know what song I am!”
“Me too, kinda,” Lucas hummed.
“Is it my vibe? How you feel about me?” Dustin pondered. Mike huffed.
“Right now, I’m feeling pretty annoyed about you,” he said. He felt slightly better as his friends joked with him; the blindfold might have contributed to his mood change too. They didn’t know why the songs played or what they meant, but he had his own suspicions. He did know that he couldn’t allow himself to see Will under pain of death, or he would probably ruin their friendship forever.
“Mike?” Mike’s head snapped up as he stared unseeing towards Will’s voice. Speak of the Devil.
“Hey,” he said softly, Lucas and Dustin greeting Will as well. Will’s footsteps got louder as he walked over to sit with them. Mike could feel the heat as their thighs brushed on the couch.
“What’s happening? Something upside down related?” Will asked, and oh, Mike hadn’t radioed him earlier. There was an awkward pause as the others realized this fact as well.
“Every time I look at someone, music starts playing,” Mike said quickly before anyone else could start talking.
“Yeah, he did it with Nancy earlier, but he won’t show us,” Dustin complained. He could always be counted on to miss the tension in a room. Will shifted next to him.
“Can I s-”
“No,” Mike interrupted. He immediately felt bad about it. “Sorry,” he said quieter. “I don’t want to look at anyone right now.” Will pressed his shoulder against Mike’s ever so slightly. Mike exhaled in relief.
“Does it hurt?” he asked, matching Mike’s softer tone.
“No,” Mike said, leaning back into Will’s shoulder. “I don’t control it or anything, I just woke up like this this morning.”
“Did you have any dreams?” Dustin asked, back in science mode. Mike nodded his head.
“Nothing crazy, though. No clocks or anything.”
“And your plan is to wear that scarf on your face forever?” Lucas added.
“No,” Mike said defensively. “Obviously.” The others would get here soon and hopefully El could fix it somehow. He dropped his head back into his hands, sighing.
“Obviously,” Will teased him. Mike could hear the laughter in his voice, at least someone was having fun with this.
It wasn’t long after Will came in that the others got there. Mike could hear concern in their voices as they asked what had happened and Nancy filled them in, but he could also tell that they were dying with curiosity to hear the music for themselves. He staunchly refused to take the blindfold off.
“I can try to see what’s happening in your mind,” El offered. “If you’re comfortable with it.” Mike wasn’t not comfortable with it, mostly anyway. They had ironically only got closer to each other once they had ended their relationship. Maybe it was the lack of expectations placed on them to be what the other needed, to be someone else.
“Okay,” he nodded. Will leant away from him on the couch, probably uncomfortable with him or maybe just giving El room to work. God, he hoped it was the second one, but it was hard to tell what anyone was thinking with the blindfold on. He knew he had been clingy ever since Will had moved in with them, but he couldn’t help it. Mike always wanted to be around Will, it was hard to force himself to act naturally and not give himself away.
El ended up taking Will’s spot on the couch anyway. Mike handed over his makeshift blindfold, resolutely keeping his eyes closed. Dustin scooched over in front of him, just in case he was to open them.
“Dude, back up,” Mike said, leaning back into the cushions.
“You can’t even see me!” Dustin exclaimed.
“I can still tell where you are.”
“Yeah, he can feel your presence,” Lucas added unhelpfully. He put on a mysterious voice.
“Like a ghost?” Will snorted.
“Exactly!” Lucas said, grinning. “You’re haunting him.” They laughed.
“No one is haunting me,” Mike complained, annoyed that he couldn’t even glare at them. That was like at least half of his personality.
“Shh!” El hissed, hitting Mike on the shoulder. It hurt more than it should have. Mike wasn’t sure what she was looking for. He tried to focus on clearing his mind. El seemed to find what she needed as she leaned back and slid the scarf up onto her forehead.
“It will go away if you look at someone,” she declared. Dustin cheered immediately, jostling him as even Will laughed this time. Mike sighed.
“I already looked at Nancy this morning, though,” he complained. It wasn’t that he didn’t want his new powers to go away, but he’d almost rather keep his eyes closed forever than have people hear the musical representations of his feelings for them. At least it was just Nancy that morning, she wouldn’t judge him even if it was embarrassing, but to show other people? Count him out.
“Wrong person,” El replied calmly. She felt no sympathy for his pity party.
“Dude, Cmon!” Dustin whined. “Just pick someone!”
“Quick question, though,” Steve interrupted. Mike startled. He hadn’t been super sure who was all in the room. “It’s not like a banshee or anything right? Like are we sure nothings gonna happen?”
“Dude, what the hell?” Dustin said flatly. The sound of a slap echoed around the room as presumably Robin slapped Steve upside the head.
“That’s so dark,” she said. People started talking over each other. Mike was overwhelmed.
“Everyone take a breath.” Thank God for Joyce. “Let’s just calm down. Nancy heard Mike’s song this morning and she’s fine. It’s okay.”
“It’s okay, Mike,” Will repeated softly to him. “Just open your eyes.” Mike took a steadying breath and slowly peaked out at the group before him. Immediately, he slammed them shut again at the cacophonous noise that erupted, multiple songs blaring over top of each other as everyone flinched or covered their ears.
“One at a time,” El suggested, rubbing her ear. Mike nodded, taking a deep breath. He slowly turned to face her on the couch, and she reached out to clasp his hand in hers. Her grip was gentle but strong, supporting him.
He opened his eyes.
I want you, I need you
But there ain’t no way I’m ever gonna love you
God, this was embarrassing. He knew his face was bright red. El raised an eyebrow at him but she was still smiling so she probably wasn’t mad at him. They had talked a lot in the past few weeks, and she knew all about his crush on Will. If he believed in the hierarchy of best friends -which he didn’t, people could have multiple best friends- he might have said she was his best friend after Will.
I cant lie, I cant tell you that I’m something I’m not
No matter how I try, I’ll never be able to give you something
Something that I just haven’t got
Ok this was getting a little too real for him to take, he wasn’t trying to come out to everyone during a song about his ex-girlfriend. Mike shut his eyes again, cutting the song off. El squeezed his hand comfortingly. There was an awkward pause as everyone tried to think of something to say that wasn’t about how pathetic that was.
“Wow,” Dustin finally spoke, never one to read the room. “That’s crazy to see in person. El smiled serenely.
“Next?”
Humiliatingly, Mike worked his way through everyone, everyone except Will that was. He just couldn’t bring himself to face his emotions. He knew he was a coward, and Will was probably hurt by his avoidance, but he couldn’t do it. He wasn’t brave like Will was. He kept trying.
Dustin.
What’s in the future, has it just begun?
Blinded by science, I’m on the run
Lucas.
Broken, we are broken
I’m walking uphill being turned around and round
Even Hopper got a chance.
I’m just an average man with an average life
I work from 9-5, hey hell I pay the price
Nothing worked. Finally. Mike sat with his head buried in his hands, back in his original position on the couch. Everyone could tell this had been hard on him. The only one left was Will.
“We’ll give you some privacy,” Joyce said as she herded the others out of the room. El squeezed him on the shoulder as she stood.
“You are strong,” she whispered. “Be brave.”
Will sat down next to him on the couch, leaving a very noticeable space between them this time. He didn’t say anything. Mike wished more than ever that he could see his face. Will had always spoken more with his expressions than his words.
“You don’t have to,” Will spoke into the silence. Mike’s head shot over to him, just managing to keep his eyes closed.
“What?” Will sighed.
“I just mean-I can tell you don’t want to look at me.” His voice broke as he said it.
“That’s not true!” Mike rushed to reassure him. Will hummed, unbelieving.
“It’s fine. It’s not like you have to or anything, and it’s obvious anyway when you picked everyone else to try first.” He sounded sad. Shit.
“That’s not true.” Mike said again. It wasn’t. Will was the only person he wanted to look at, the only person he would have felt comfortable sharing his feelings with if those feelings hadn’t been about Will himself. “I-” he trailed off.
“It doesn’t matter,” Will said resigned. “Let’s just get it over with and we can forget it ever happened.” Mike shot his hand out, feeling for Will. He grabbed onto his knee and pressed hard.
“It does matter.” Mike promised. “I- I’m not good with words. I know that. I know I can’t convince you, but I can show you.” He opened his eyes, staring at his lap. Will slowly reached down to cover Mike’s hand on his leg.
“Okay,” he said softly, trusting Mike.
Mike looked up at Will. He blinked.
You’re the meaning in my life
You’re the inspiration
Blink.
I am a man who will fight for your honor
I’ll be the hero you’re dreaming of
Blink.
I’m out of my head
Hopelessly devoted to you
Blink.
Carried your books from school
Playing make believe you’re married to me
Practically every love song he had ever heard was fighting to get out of his head first. He didn’t fight it. If this was how he could finally confess how much Will mattered to him, how important he was to him, then Mike would do it. He would do anything for Will.
“Mike,” Will voice caught in his throat. His eyes were huge as he stared at Mike. “What are you-” He was flushed red all the way down to his neck, disappearing under his collar.
“This is how I feel,” Mike said. He turned his hand over to lace his fingers with Will’s. “I’m sorry I’m so-that I never told you. I tried to push it away- push you away, and I was a terrible friend, and I know we already talked about that, but this is why. This is the truth.”
Mike stood up off of the couch, pulling Will up along with him. He grabbed Will’s other hand, holding both tight in his grasp and stepped closer to him, their feet barely inches apart. Will was tearing up, but he couldn’t seem to think of anything to say. His mouth opened and closed a couple times as he stared back at Mike.
“The truth is I love you.” Mike said softly. He let go of one of Will’s hands to reach up and cup his face. “I was scared, but I could never be afraid of loving you, Will.” Will sobbed as he threw his arms around Mike, falling into his waiting arms as they both held on tight.
“I love you too,” Will said. He drew back just enough to look at Mike. “I love you.” He was grinning, tears streaming down his face as he clenched his fists in Mike’s shirt. He was stunning, lit up with happiness that Mike knew was reflected in his own smile.
“I love you,” Mike said again. He leaned in, brushing his lips across Will’s damp cheek. Again, I love you, again I love you, again I love you. “I’ll never stop.” He promised.
Wrapped in their own little world, neither noticed as the music faded away around them and into the night.