Chapter Text
“I said to leave it alone, damn it Tony!” the voice of Bruce could be heard very clearly even though he was crouching behind the table. And on the opposite of the room then Tony who was plastered on the wall with sheepish smile on his face. Yes, he could hear him clearly even through the still hissing equipment.
“Oh, come on it wasn’t that bad, besides you didn’t say to leave it alone.” was the answer of the so called genius.
“No, I said do not touch it.” came exasperated reply.
“I didn’t touch it.” the quick reply sounded and Bruce pinched his brow.
“So it combusted by your presence alone?”
“What can I say my hotness…” Tony started only to be cut off.
“Just don’t Tony.” Tony almost felt guilty, however if Bruce didn’t know better than to let him close to dangerous experiments he shouldn’t have let him in. Like seriously what did he expect? It was nerd’s dream come true.
“I already said it’s not a Transporter.” Bruce said reading Tony’s track of thought.
“No, it only transports person from point A to point B. No, it’s definitely not a transporter.” Tony couldn’t help himself, before he added. “You know, I think I should hire Scott. So, you know I could say: Beam me up, Scotty.”
Bruce only groaned, just why he thought having Tony here would be good thing. Yes, he didn’t. Only the engineer in question had nose for technology beyond years, especially if it was from sci-fi movie. Not, that he would admit it aloud. At least not to Tony. It was not a transporter from Star Trek.
“Sir, before you continue with this riveting discussion, could you remove the scissors next to your head before Mrs. Potts or Master Loki comes.” FRIDAY interrupted before they could start arguing again.
Tony seemed surprised and looked, only to see that indeed there were scissors few inches from his ear. “Oh.”
Bruce snickered and Tony looked at him in incredulity. “Oh, come on Tony. You deserve it, you shouldn’t mess around in my lab. This is the prove of it.” then he looked around the lab, unhappy. His lab was smashed, for lack of better words. Like Hulk was given free reign. Not that he would cause such destruction to place Bruce valued, they had an agreement of sorts, after all.
“Don’t worry Brucie I help you with getting the lab reconstructed to look it like before. We could make even improvements.” Tony started thinking about everything that he could improve or even re-engineer. Some of these things were like centuries old. Why Bruce never changed them would be forever mystery to Tony.
“No, Tony. You are forbidden to make any changes here.” At Tony’s incredulous look he continued. “No, we have deal. I help you with experiments and stay at Stark Tower with the Avengers, but you won’t have say in my lab.”
“I think you have more from this deal than me.” answered Tony, but let it be.
“Sir, may I remind you that you have meeting with director Fury in 20 minutes.” FRIDAY interrupted once again and Tony sighed, why exactly he agreed to it again?
“Can’t we reschedule FRIDAY?” joked Tony as he knew that this time he needs to come. Loki would have his otherwise, doesn’t mean he have to come on time.
“This would be very unwise as Mrs. Potts prepared for it already.” answered him the AI. Damn, JARVIS would have known and answered with his British dry humor. He really missed his friend, no matter how many years already went and gone since then.
“Yeah, yeah. Coming FRIDAY. Don’t keep your panties in twist.” this time the AI didn’t answer. Tony waved to Bruce who snorted before leaving the room.
“It’s only took you 10 years to figure that you can’t rebuild the Bifrost. Wow, you guys are really smart. It must be boring in your small minds.” Stark tried the first 5 minutes to be polite, like really tried, but seriously how can he deal with these assholes?
For his problems Loki kicked his shin and gave him meaningful gaze. Not that the others could tell. Loki had a goddamn good poker face. Like Tony.
Tony knew Loki wanted him to play nice with the boring kids. Get in good graces with the king. Well, good graces might be bit too much to accomplish. It would be good enough if they would reach don’t kill on sight. Not that Tony had problem with the All-daddy, well if you don’t count the fiasco with Loki and his adoption and his blindness to Thor’s thick-headness.
In the past few years Loki and Thor finally started talking to each other. Sometimes Loki would slip and call Thor brother in turn. And since Loki could go only where Tony could, visiting Asgard was out of question. So, playing nice with boring Aesir it is, so Loki won’t kill him. Not that he would admit it.
So, yeah he shouldn’t have let himself wasted on his first visit on Asgard with the rest of the team. And no, he shouldn’t have taken the dare Fandral made. And no, the last he should have done after successfully stealing the golden apple from Idun’s garden was to put it on the table in his workshop. However, how was he supposed to know that Dummy made him shake and that the apple was part of it. Even FRIDAY said it was edible and good to drink!
But tell that to daddy dearest. Well, he did and tried to apologize. Well, apologize might be bit too strong word, but hey he was Tony Stark, he never apologized. Doesn’t mean he didn’t try. The old goat didn’t already like him for proving Loki innocent. And now when he accidently became sort of immortal, he got almost killed with that spear the old fashioned pirate caries with himself all the time.
Luckily Thor was fast enough to stop his father and somehow convince him not to kill Tony. But he still loathed the very sight of Anthony Stark, so he forbade him from ever stepping on Asgard.
Tony couldn’t complain much. Thought he wasn’t okay with Loki as his roommate, or flatmate, well more like housemate really. See, even when Tony found out Loki was innocent and proved it to everyone, it didn’t mean he liked that jackass. And the daddy Allfather knew about his dislike and made Stark accept the mischief god in his house. Which was totally not fun to explain to everyone else. Stark shuddered, never again.
So, here he was offering his (and by extension) Loki’s services to fix the Rainbow bridge. Which would mean coming to Asgard.
“Please friend Tony, we ask you sincerely for your help.” said Thor before his companions had chance to reply to Stark’s snark.
“Does Daddy Dearest know you are asking me?” the engineer asked quietly.
Thor hesitated before he answered. “He gave me the task of repairing the brigde and whatever means I want to take I am allowed by his decree.”
Sneaky Thor, very sneaky. Even Loki looked intrigued by this side of Thor. “So I’m means to fix a bridge.” Tony said part of amused and partly annoyed.
“Brother I’m perfectly certain that when Odin said whatever means, he certainly didn’t mean for you to ask Tony or me.” Loki said with grin.
“Now, dear brother, father gave me task of utmost importance and since he is all-knowing it would be very lacking if he didn’t think I would use only the best resource to complete it. I can be hardly blamed for performing my duty to best of my abilities, now can’t I?” Thor asked with wicked glint that was very out of place on his face. He spends way too much time with Loki.
“Yes, you are right Thor. It’s hardly your fault if you do.” Loki now had shit-eating grin on his face that was complete mirror of Tony’s own. This is gonna be fun.
Tony’s POV
Whoever said this is gonna be fun, should hang himself. This is definitely not fun. I thought as the Bifrost started freakin’ glowing. This wasn’t supposed to happen, at least not according to my calculations. And this started so excitingly.
After we were given report on the state of bridge I consulted with Loki and we came to conclusion about how the repairs should go. Did I ever mention that Loki’s brain is amazing. Finally someone who can keep with my talk without getting that blank looks in their eyes. Not that it matter right now.
“Stark, stop lazing about and do something about the force field!” Loki yelled as he once more tried coming closer to me and failed. Even his magic didn’t dent it. So much for most powerful mage at his side. Just fucking great.
“I’m working on it. And yelling at me won’t help getting it done faster.” I yelled back. Only there was nothing for me fix. No control panel, the big ass sword totally not counts, for me to work with. I couldn’t do a thing. As I started thinking about an out, because Stark doesn’t give up, Lokes yelled once more.
“I said stop yelling I’m trying to think here princess.” I said annoyed as I pointed finger at him. Which didn’t quite work as my arm was turning invisible. Like the rest of me. “Oh, I didn’t expect this to happen. What exactly is happening again? ‘Cause this doesn’t feel like normal transport - not that I know how traveling by Bifrost feels like.” I added like every bit of smart ass that I am.
“This is definitely not how traveling by Bifrost looks like. First it’s faster and second you look like bulb, not start disappearing. And lastly it feels wrong. It reminds me little of the Time gem energy we encountered.” Lokes was paler then normal, making me realize that this is – whatever this is – it’s bad and I’m not likely get out of it.
“Time gem? That’s good I only appear sometime else – well if I’m lucky enough – which I definitely am. Hey, Lokes. It was fun, though don’t even think about leaving the bridge unfixed. It’s your responsibility. Right, tell others bye, and not to worry. I’m Tony fuckin’ Stark I can deal with whatever is on the other side.” I said cheekily, even if I didn’t really feel like it.
Lokes appeared enraged and I was glad for the force field. ‘Cause in that moment it was more probable he would kill me before the magicky-rainbow-gay bridge could.
“Are you giving up?” sounded unexpected reply.
“Of course I’m not, otherwise I would sabotage it and the bridge would go boom before it could transport me wherever it wants to. And I’m totally not doing that, I’m trusting that I end up living in whenever, so not giving up, see?”
“You’re moron, but that’s expected. You know your is going to kill me when they find out I let you disappear.” said Loki without hint of remorse and I couldn’t but grin.
“Whenever I end up I’m gonna find you, like hell I’m sitting on my hands when I know somewhere up is crazy, psychotic deity with brains Einstein would be jealous of.”
“You’re lunatic, Stark.” Loki just shook his head, already accepting the fate or maybe he knows this will malfunction and nothing will happen. Which could absolutely happen. Loki is jerk that way. I couldn’t help but be suspicious about it.
“No, Stark. I do not know a single thing about what is going to happen.”
“You know reading my mind is really not okay.”
“Like hell. You know I can’t read minds you are just expressive. Besides who would want to go into your head, I don’t want to be crazier than I am.” Loki huffed and I couldn’t help but laugh. I never expected to befriend the mischief god, thought the others didn’t seem surprised at it all. They all put the suffering mask on and said it couldn’t be avoided. Band of assholes. But that’s what family is about. After that everything went black. And that’s how I disappeared from year 2021 without leaving trace behind, yay for me.