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Tobirama is sleeping so peacefully next to him Izuna could just melt. It’s so rare for the younger man to look so relaxed. So content. Even when he’s doing something he enjoys, like training his team, whatever weird science he gets up to, or cooking, he always has a tension to his shoulders that just never seems to leave him.
Unless he’s asleep. And maybe it’s creepy how much he enjoys staying up later than Tobirama just so he can watch him sleep. But if it's the only time he gets to see his face slack and his body relaxed then it’s worth it.
He remembers when they first started dating and he kept taking the fact that Tobirama was tense even on their dates as Tobirama having doubts about their relationship and if it would last. He was always so defensive and would jump down Tobirama’s throat almost every other day making vague threats to break up if Tobirama couldn’t get his head out of his ass.
Then of course Tobirama would look like a kicked puppy and Izuna would get pissed off because he was conviced Tobirama was just trying to manipulate him into staying together. But Izuna couldn’t understand why when it was so clear the other man didn’t even want to really be in a relationship.
This went on for months until he finally had enough and broken up with Tobirama. Predictably Tobirama acted the way he always did and went on like normal. Further proof to him that their relationship was doomed to fail.
At least until two weeks later when Hashirama finally confronted him about how depressed Tobirama had been and how he hadn’t understood what he did wrong.
Izuna’s first instinct had been to call Hashirama a liar and blow him off. It was obvious by the true emotion Hashirama was showing that Tobirama really was hurting. That what Hashirama said was true.
“I don’t know why he would be. He’s the one who didn’t want to be in a relationship.”
Hashirama had looked so shocked it made him second guess himself for a moment.
“Izuna,” Hashirama says seriously, “I don’t know what gave you that impression, but Tobirama loves you.”
“Then why is he always so tense? Why does he look like he wants to run half the time?”
“Do you really not know?” Hashirama asks in shock.
“Know what?” What could there possibly be to know that would explain away all of that.
“A few things, but one, you’re his first relationship ever, so everything you feel like is obvious is ocmpletelyu new to him. But also that the way we were raised, no the way Tobirama was raised, made him so he’s always tense waiting for the next blow. He spent years trying to be ready for cruel words or harsh fists. Being calm just doesn’t come naturally to him.”
Izuna felt like he was going to throw up.
He had done everything Tobirama was afraid of, in his anger he had snapped and thrown out cruel words and then when they broke up he basically told him he wasn’t good enough for him and never would be.
Holy shit he’s the ass hole. Not Tobirama.
“I fucked up.”
Hashriama gives him a confused little head tilt.
“I proved every one of his fears right and I treated him like shit because I thought he kept trying to break up with me. I’m a horrible person. No wonder he was always tense. Even in the beginning I used to jokingly insult him. What if he thought I meant it? I have to fix this.”
And thankfully Tobirama had let him fix it, had welcomed him back with open arms even though he should have thrown him through a window.
It took years for Tobirama to actually relax around him. And now that he does Izuna just has to stop and watch him sleep.
He’s so adorable he just has to lean down and kiss him on the forehead. Tobirama doesn’t stir, but only because he knows how safe he is with Izuna laying in bed with him.
He’s so damn lucky Tobirama gave him another chance.