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Scott Hunter coming out had changed some things. Obviously for Shane and Ilya, it was basically the catalyst to them dating.
However it also brought the conversation about homophobia within the sport into question.
Shane heard the whispering of a potential pride night until rainbow tape and pride merch rolled out.
He felt conflicted, on the one hand, he appreciated the attempt, but on the other, he still didn’t feel safe to come out.
While playing in Vancouver during their pride night, Shane heard laughter while sitting in the hallway waiting to be let on the ice. It wasn’t the laughter of hockey players that he was used to, it was jovial and flamboyant.
As he tightened up his skates, he looked over to see four people in sparkly outfits, intense makeup, big colourful hair and shoes so high they looked more dangerous than the literal blades Shane had strapped to his feet. Drag queens? Oh drag queens and kings Shane corrected himself. He had never seen drag performers before, he only vaguely knew of them because Rose was fawning over a drag king and pouting when Shane said that a drag show wouldn’t really be his scene. Vancouver was more progressive Shane guessed.
“Oh, hi boys!” The drag performers teased,
“I hope you have fun losing tonight” one of the drag kings laughed.
Some of the players looked at each other confused and uncomfortable as these sparkly makeup covered people laughed and chirped them.
“Why Shane Hollander, it would be a shame if one of my pearl necklaces broke and you accidentally slipped on them” one of the queens giggled.
Shane smiled, “well it’d be a shame for you to lose your nice jewelry that way”.
“Oh you are sweet aren’t you” the drag queen laughed.
“Stop flirting with the enemy” the other drag king nudged the queen.
“Good luck out there boys” the drag performers all said in unison and laughed as they walked off.
Most of the team went back to prepping for the game with a few of them laughing about what transpired.
“Did you see the rack on one of the queens?”
“Were those guys' muscles real?”
“Uhg, really? Drag queens? This is hockey not a gay bar”
“I wonder what they look like without all that makeup”.
Shane wondered what it must be like to get to be so authentic and free like those drag performers. They didn’t seem bothered at all by some of the confused and rude glances at them, instead opting to taunt in a way that was similar to locker room talk but just felt more free and genuine than whenever Shane attempted to fit in.
After the Metros won, Shane decided to slip away before the others dragged him out clubbing.
He exited through a side entrance spitting him out onto a poorly lit street under the skytrain.
He was met face to face with one of the drag queens smoking weed.
“Mr Hollander, congrats on the game tonight” she smiled, her outfit catching what little light was there.
“Thanks, uh, you are?”
“Ella Rose” she held out her hand with long intricate nails, “it’s funnier in Spanish”.
Shane shook her hand not understanding what she meant, “did your performance go well tonight?” He asked.
She inhaled and exhaled smoke, “well enough, can’t expect much from a disinterested potentially homophobic audience but this check will make up for the lack of tips” she smiled.
“Yeah hockey has a bit of a reputation unfortunately”.
“It’s nice to know some players support the drags at least” Ella smiled, “I love it when people stare”.
Shane shifted his grip on his bag while Ella took another inhale.
“I’m not keeping you from anything right Mr. Hollander?”
“No, just waiting for a taxi”.
“Same! I have another gig tonight, you’re free to come, I could keep your bag in our dressing room”.
“Ah, no thanks I prefer relaxing after a game”.
“I see, the hockey player doesn’t want people seeing him at a drag show, surprise surprise” Ella joked.
“No, no, it’s not that” Shane thought about how he was planning on texting Ilya to see if he was still up “I’m definitely not homophobic”.
“I’m sure if you were, Scott would hunt you down” the queen laughed at her own joke.
Shane couldn’t help but feel a bit of envy towards the drag queen. She didn’t have to hide who she was, in fact she dressed in a way that called more attention than Shane would ever purposefully try to attain.
He thought about how he was missing out on a whole community of people by keeping his secret, hell, he still felt a bit embarrassed that he even knew what drag race was.
He didn’t like feeling this internal shame to an integral part of himself and he was jealous that Ella was able to express herself so freely.
“What’s it like?” Shane found himself blurting out, “doing drag I mean”.
Ella put out her joint having finished it, flicking it onto an ashtray above a garbage can, “well it’s fabulous of course, though the makeup takes awhile, the shoes are painful, corseting is painful, and people irrationally hate you for wearing sparkly outfits, but it’s all worth it. You’re not asking to be put into drag right? Usually it’s the drunk bachelorettes asking us that”
“No, it’s just you definitely lead a completely different life from me, I’m curious”.
“Well I think we’re not too different you and I, we have competitions too, and we both perform and we’re both in the industry of entertainment” she chuckled, “we just have lip sync battles rather than fighting, and our pads are for giving us some va va voom and I use so much hairspray on my wig it might as well be a helmet”.
“I never thought of it that way” Shane chuckled.
“You just do hockey drag, getting all suited up in your pads and tall shoes, putting on the persona of the amazing Shane Hollander, but then you take off the costume and here you are, just like me when I finally wash all this off this morning, though don’t get it twisted, what I do will always be much more glamorous than what you do” Ella flicked her hair humorously punctuating her statement.
“I wouldn’t doubt it” Shane smiled.
Eventually, Ella’s taxi drove up. She sprayed herself with perfume before getting in the car.
“It was nice meeting you Mr. Hollander, I hope one day to see you at one of my shows” she winked as she got in.
Shane casually waved as she drove off, costume sparkling through the rear window.
His taxi pulled up as well as he went back to his hotel room, hoping for the day when he didn’t have to hide who he was.