Chapter Text
Loki had always known he would get caught.
It was only a matter of time before someone found out he wasn't actually deceased. Posing as the All-father had served no real purpose other than giving him perverse joy. It had been his way of spitting in Odin's face without actually, well, spitting in Odin's face.
Now he was forced to initiate phase two of his plan. If his oaf of a brother had not shacked up with a useless mortal, he wouldn't be in this predicament. But Thor's incessant roaming on Midgard had led him straight into Odin's new home- a street corner in Manhattan. Unfortunately for Loki, Thor had recognized the old man immediately, even dressed as a hobo, and the entire palace was in an uproar. The fortunate part was that they were all foolish enough to believe that the hobo was Loki in disguise. Therefore, Loki had precious few hours to escape before everyone discovered the truth.
Loki chuckled to himself as he pictured the look on the old man's face when Thor undoubtedly jerked him up from his corner and threatened to end his life. Odin had no idea who he was, let alone his adoptive son. Thor would have quite the web to untangle before learning the entire truth, and by that time, Loki himself would have pulled a vanishing act, just like always.
As he paced back and forth in front of the throne he had procured only a few months ago, he contemplated how he would make his escape.
He knew that hiding anywhere on Asgard was out of the question because as soon as Odin regained his memory, he would send search parties who would scour the entire realm looking for him.
Vanaheim was also out- there were far too many of his scorned lovers in that wretched realm.
He supposed he could go to Hel. His daughter did run the place, and it would be easy to reach since Sleipnir could carry him there without the use of a portal. Shaking his head, he set that idea to the side, hoping he wouldn't actually have to resort to such measures.
He didn't even want to consider Jotunheim for obvious reasons. There was some- awkwardness- there to say the very least.
And if he were to go to Midgard, he would certainly have to disguise himself. The good people of "Earth" didn't much care for him these days, and he definitely didn't want any more trouble from those blasted Avengers.
Adrienne was late for class. Really late. And now there was a noise coming from underneath the hood of her car. Great.
She glanced at her watch. There was absolutely no way she could make it to campus, find a parking place, and hike the half-mile to her class before her professor took attendance. Why was she always running late to this class? She enjoyed Astronomy. She really did. But the professor; an older Russian man with an accent as thick as grease paint, was a stickler for tardiness, and if a student was one minute late, they were counted absent. She shook her head, deciding to save herself the embarrassment and stay home.
Another sound from the car made her stop before climbing the stairs back to her apartment.
It was a strange scratching sound that she almost didn't even want to investigate. The very last thing she needed at the moment was one more thing. Especially if it was a damn mouse infestation in her engine compartment. She didn't know much about cars, but she did know that cars didn't make noise when they weren't running. And mice weren't good for fuel injectors.
Just as she was about to push the car and the noise to the back of her mind to worry about another day, she heard another noise. This time, it was a small, scared mewl.
A kitten!
Earlier that morning, Loki had finally decided Midgard was the...lesser of eight evils. Having been there before, he chose to transform himself into an animal native to virtually every part of the dilapidated realm; a common house cat. Actually, he preferred starting as a kitten, since he knew most mortals just couldn't resist them. Being tiny, furry, and adorable would practically ensure him a warm place to sleep later that night.
Probably even on top of some cute mortal's soft breasts.
Unfortunately, he had already had a run-in with the neighbor's dog; a hulking bull dog by the name of "Butch." That was precisely why he was hanging onto the heart?...brain?... epicenter... of an automobile, mewling and scratching for all he was worth in an attempt to get someone's attention.
I never should have called Romanov a "mewling quim..." The mortals are correct. Karma IS a bitch.
"Kitten? Are you in there?" Adrienne called as she lifted the hood of her car. She had absolutely no idea where to begin looking for the animal, but she knew she couldn't leave it in there.
Clearly I am, mortal. I just called out to you, didn't I? Loki mewled again.
Loki idly wondered if he could actually roll his eyes in cat form.
"Where are you? Come on out, and I'll get you a nice bowl of milk," Adrienne crooned.
Is that supposed to entice me?
Loki let out a long meow, and Adrienne ducked her head further into the engine. Suddenly, she saw a black fuzzy tail. It was ramrod straight due to the fact that the kitten was barely holding onto one of the hoses under the hood.
"Aww...you're in quite the predicament, aren't you little one?"
Did you really just call me 'little one,' mortal? Loki hissed.
Tentatively, so as not to frighten the kitten, she reached her hand down into the engine to grasp the tiny kitten around its midsection. To her surprise, it didn't put up a fight. It simply hung limply from her hand.
It was the most adorable kitten Adrienne had ever seen; with fluffy raven fur and almost intelligent looking green eyes. Its stare was so intense, it unnerved her.
"How'd you get stuck in there, little..." she turned the kitten around, hoping to catch a glimpse under its tail, but it spat at her so violently, she startled.
"...um, sorry. I didn't mean to offend. Just wanted to use the correct pronoun."
She rubbed the kitten behind its ears, and it seemed to relax in her hand, so she pressed it closer to her chest and started up the stairs to her apartment.
Ah, that's better. Yes, you're very soft here. Loki purred contentedly.
To be continued...