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Simeon sat at his desk, working on something that really should've been someone else's problem. After his not guilty verdict—and the media circus surrounding him—he really should've been grateful that the circus kept him on, regardless of how many annoying jobs were "mysteriously" getting pushed onto him. Which was probably fair. Then again, business did see quite a boom thanks to all the people hoping to see the presidential assassin. But, whatever. He had a job. Better than he'd expected going into the trial.
While he sorted through the orders needing to be placed, rain knocked against the window. Simeon wouldn't be letting it in, the new cabin he and Bronco had been given too well constructed. The flashes of light and loud complaints of thunder wouldn't change that.
That was the other thing. Bronco was in the kitchen, loading the dishwasher. Obviously, he was supposed to be dead. But, he wasn't. And for some reason, he'd agreed to let Simeon stay after an obsessive fan had tried to get into Simeon's trailer. He hadn't had time to process what this meant for them, and he suspected Bronco hadn't either.
It took him a minute to realize he was clenching his jaw, all the disorganized needs of the circus spread across his spread-thin mind. Whatever. After this, he could just go to bed if he really wanted to. Or sit on his phone and watch stupid videos until his brain went numb. He just needed to get it done. He took a deep breath, the way Mr. Kanis had taught him. In for one, two, three—
An ear-ringing gunshot crack reached his ears, white blinding him for a moment. Instinctively, he scrambled away from the source, half-stumbling-half-falling out of his chair away from the window. Trying to calm his racing heart, he realized it was only lightning. It must have been close.
He bit down on his lip, suddenly trying not to cry. What was he, five? Scared by the fucking weather?
"The hell was that?" Bronco asked, startling Simeon yet again.
"Just thunder," Simeon spat, more at himself.
"…You alright?"
"Fine." He put his hands over his face, and dragged them down. "I'm fine. Just got startled, is all."
"Si." Bronco took a step towards him.
"What?" Simeon refrained from snapping. What was with that tone?
He folded his arms. "You're not 'fine.' You look like you're ready to bolt out that door."
"It just startled me is all."
"No, man. You've been off all day."
Why was he so worried? "You think so?"
"Don't fucking deflect on me. I know so. I know you. Come on." Bronco sat down on the edge of the bed. That was the other thing. Simeon was purportedly crashing on the couch, but every night, like clockwork, Bronco would ask Simeon to share the bed with him. For whose sake, he wasn't sure.
"What?" He really didn't want to talk about this.
"You're fucking miserable. Come sit."
"I'm not miserable." He wished he had a better comeback.
"Sit. Please." He said the last word like he was forcing it out.
Simeon huffed, but sat on the edge of the bed. Bronco was so stubborn, some battles just weren't worth fighting.
"The lightning startled you, yeah?"
"'Course it did. It was two fucking feet from the cabin."
"And you've already been having a rough day."
"What? No I'm not." Rough week, maybe. Or month. Or year. He wasn't sure. But nothing particular stood out about today.
"Don't do that shit. I'm sick of it. Just be fucking straight with me for once. You've been having a rough day. You've been staring at that paperwork like you wanna use it as kindling, you barely ate…I mean, I don't really need more than that."
"I just wasn't that hungry," Simeon mumbled. He didn't have a better answer.
"Bullshit. You're always hungry." It was true. According to the ER nurse, he was malnourished. On top of the beat-down he'd received.
"Well I wasn't fucking hungry!" The truth was, he had been. His stomach had hurt from how hungry he was. But the idea of putting food in his mouth sounded like torture.
"Why do you keep doing this?!" Bronco snapped. "Pretending you're fine when you're not! Just let me protect you!"
Simeon paused. Where did that come from?
He sighed. "I just…I'm worried about you. I want to keep you safe. Obviously. And I want to help you. But I can't do that if you don't talk to me. You understand?"
Simeon sighed. "Yeah. I just don't know why you…" Why he'd want to.
"Because I love you. And you know it."
"…I still don't get that."
"Well, you don't have to. I love you, and that's just how it is." Bronco reached out his hand. "Just let me worry about you. Please."
Simeon sighed, and scooted closer. He let Bronco wrap his arms around him. Holding him safe. Holding him close.
"Talk to me."
"…I thought it was a gun," he finally admitted.
Bronco squeezed him tight. "Shit. No wonder."
"And this stupid supply chain thing is already pissing me off, and I keep having to avoid weirdos on the clock, and…" He groaned. "I'm just tired, I think."
"You're burned out, more like. You were also on trial for fucking murder like a month ago."
"…Yeah."
Simeon just let himself be held for a moment. Thunder cracked outside again, distant enough that it only made him jump a little.
It was nice, being held like this. As little as he deserved it. If he was stronger, he wouldn't let Bronco comfort him. He wouldn't make Bronco care about him. After everything, it was more than he deserved.
"What else is on your mind?"
"…I don't know why you're letting me stay here." Part of Simeon was scared it was so he could hurt him. Betray him. Break Simeon's heart like he broke Bronco's.
"…Because some creep tried to get at you while you were asleep? I'm supposed to protect you, remember?"
"But why?" Simeon insisted. "I don't know why you put up with me. After everything. Don't you…?" Didn't Bronco hate him? Fear him? Resent him?
"Because I love you, jackass. And I don't like seeing the man I love get hurt."
But all I do is hurt you, Simeon didn't say.
"I can protect you. We both know it. Just let me. You don't have to keep doing this. Pretending that you're fine. Protecting yourself. Let me protect you. Please. If you'd let me protect you before, none of this would've happened."
"What?" Simeon's throat was too tight.
"You know I would've killed them all for you. You know I would've. I would've done anything for you. I just don't get why…"
"I-it's hard to explain," he answered, lame as it was.
Bronco sighed, letting out a little frustration. "Can you try, at least?"
"…I was scared," he admitted. "I tried so hard to make sure you wouldn't betray me, but I…I mean, i-if there was even a little doubt…It was life-or-death. And I…I was so scared. I mean, w-what if you came for me? After I killed the president? After you went to jail? After…I don't know." He sighed. "I was wrong. And I'm sorry. Is that what you want to hear?"
"Yeah. It is. Obviously I'm not over it. Probably won't be for a long time. But I still love you."
Simeon didn't know what to say to that. He didn't deserve this.
Another crack of thunder pushed him further into Bronco's arms. It took him a moment to realize he was shaking. He hated how weak it made him feel.
"I got you," Bronco murmured. "I'm right here."
Tears spilled from his eyes against his will. Fuck, he felt so pathetic.
"There you go. You're good. We're good. Okay?"
"…Okay."
Despite his instincts screaming to him that he didn't deserve this, he stayed nestled in Bronco's warmth. It was so hard to resist. And what good had his instincts done him when it came to Bronco?
He felt one of Bronco's hands shift, shuffling into a pocket. "What are you doing?" Simeon sniffled.
Bronco held up the phone, just visible in Simeon's periphery. "Texting Gina. You're not doing that damn paperwork. And for that matter, you're taking a few days off work."
"Bronco, it's—"
"Nope. Nuh-uh. I'm putting you on house arrest. You've gotta relax."
"It's not a—"
"I don't wanna hear it. What, you want to file those orders? You want to work on your feet for hours tomorrow with weirdos trying to get to you?"
"No, but I really should—"
"Oh, fuck that," Bronco spat. "You're going through a lot. Everyone can see that. If they're upset by that, then fuck 'em. And they won't be. It's Regina. If she knew how you were feeling right now, she'd probably make you take the month off."
"…I just don't know why you're…"
"Why I'm what? Trying to keep you from going down in flames?" He wasn't budging an inch.
Simeon didn't say anything. Because, yeah, why did Bronco care about him? After everything? Why shouldn't he let Simeon go out in a blaze?
"Simeon." He sighed. "You don't have to accept it. But don't fight it. Please."
Simeon sniffled again. Pathetic.
It was so hard. Because intuitively, he knew he didn't deserve this. And it was so hard trying to fight against what he knew to be true, even with Bronco's insistence. He just didn't know what else to do.
"…Distract me," Simeon eventually mumbled.
"Huh?"
"If you don't want me fighting it, then distract me." He sniffled again. "Please. I…I just need something easy right now."
"Yeah, okay. Uh, I was reading this chess book today." Oh, god. What had he done? Still, Simeon couldn't help the fond smile that crept up onto his face.
As Bronco continued on, Simeon felt himself relaxing in Bronco's arms. He didn't quite fall asleep, but it was a close thing. It was nice. Hearing Bronco's voice rumble in his ear, listening to Bronco ramble on about openings and endings he knew he could forget about the moment Bronco stopped speaking, feeling Bronco's warmth wrap around him…
Simeon did fall asleep eventually. And when he did, Bronco lifted him in his arms, tucked him under the blankets, and turned off the light. Then, he grabbed the papers from the desk, balled them up, and threw them away in the kitchen trash.
Simeon himself noticed none of this. In fact, he noticed nothing at all. Not the moving of his body, not the rustling of the papers, not Bronco's footsteps, and not the cracks of thunder or the rain continuing to knock on the window. For once, he had nothing to worry about.