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Mukuro sat in her seat, her fingers on the armrest tense as she tried to focus on taking deep breaths in an attempt to ignore the throbbing pain in the back of her skull. Aoi and Makoto had been looking forward to this movie for weeks, and they were both enraptured by it, judging by their intense focus on the big screen, leaning forwards.
However, she could hardly focus on the movie itself. She had woken up with a light headache that had soon developed into the throbbing in her skull. She’d taken several painkillers throughout the day in an attempt to quell the pain, but it hadn’t done much besides taking a slight edge off. A part of her had desperately wished someone in their group would cancel, but she didn’t want to be the one to cancel. She’d promised Makoto she’d come see the movie with him, and she was excited to experience his passion with him, too.
But sitting here in this stuffy cinema, with each boom in the theater sending a fresh pulse of pain through her brain, she was deeply regretting not canceling earlier. She checked her phone discreetly for the time, and was dismayed to find that it’d only been thirty minutes since the movie started. She had at least an hour more to go. She grit her teeth and took a deep breath through her nose, fighting the pain and nausea.
A fight scene started in the movie, and the sound of action from the movie earned an excited gasp from Aoi and Makoto. She hadn’t been watching the movie, however, and the sudden loud sound sent a sliver of pain through her head, making her whimper under her breath in pain.
“Are you okay?” Makoto suddenly asked, leaning over to her in the dark, putting his hand on top of hers. She winced; she must’ve been not quiet enough.
“I’m fine, it just surprised me is all.” She tried her best to keep her voice steady and strong.
“Are you sure? Your hands are really clammy and cold. Do you want to go outside for some fresh air?”
That sounded like a good idea to her. If she was outside away from the others, maybe she’d have better luck trying to ride out the pain until the movie was done. She would be a bit disappointed to not watch Makoto be so excited about the movie (she thought it was very cute), but at least this way he could finish the movie without worrying about her.
“Yeah, maybe. I’ll be back, don’t worry about me.”
She shimmied her way past the seats and walked her way out of the theater. Her limbs felt more sluggish than she’d realized when she was sitting down. When she left the theater and walked into the hallway, the fluorescent lights suddenly assaulted her eyes, exacerbating her pain. The sudden stabbing pain redoubled her nausea, and she stumbled forwards to a trash can, slumping over it as she emptied the contents of her stomach into it.
“Mukuro! Oh shit, are you okay?” She heard Makoto from behind her. She hadn’t heard or seen him come after her as she left. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.
“Just a bit of a headache, I’ll be fine.” She gave him a weak smile and a thumbs up, hoping he’d take her word for it.
“Do you want to go home?” He walked over, rubbing his hand on her back. The warmth of his hand made her sigh pleasantly, but she didn’t want to keep him away from his movie.
“It’s no big deal, we can go finish the movie.”
“Mukuro, you look really pale. I really think we should go home.” His eyes were full of concern, making her heart twinge with shame. She didn’t want him to worry about her.
“I don’t want you to miss the movie, Makoto. You’ve been talking about these ninja turtles for weeks.”
He huffed an incredulous laugh at her response. “I can watch it later, it’s gonna be in theaters for a few more weeks at least. Besides, I want to make sure you’re okay.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course! Let me just go tell Aoi and then we can head back to the dorms.” He left to go back inside the theater, leaving her alone with her headache and thoughts. On one hand, she was secretly pleased that he’d chosen to pick her over his movie. On the other hand, she felt flushed with shame at having thought such a childish thought, at ever doubting him. Was she being too needy?
—------
They’d made it back to her dorm room, and she lay on the bed with the lights turned off as Makoto gathered blankets and water. Her cheeks pinked slightly as he tucked her into bed like a child. She couldn’t remember the last time someone took care of her like that. He turned to leave after he wished her a good night, then stopped and turned back around.
“Mukuro, you know I care about what you want, right?”
“Hmm?” Where was that suddenly coming from?
“I just… you can tell me if you don’t want to do something, or don’t like something. I want you to be happy, y’know?” He was on his knees at her bedside now, grabbing her hands and looking at her at her eye level. She felt a little bit like a trapped animal right now, like a gecko caught in a sticky trap. But the sincerity in his eyes rooted her to the spot, and she forcibly reminded herself that she could trust Makoto.
“I don’t– I don’t want to be a burden to anyone,” she whispered, afraid to voice her deep, buried truths. That caused his face to twinge into something sad, and he gently brushed some of her sweaty hair from her forehead.
“You’re not a burden, not to me at least. It’s important to me that you know that.” He leant in towards her face, whispering as he kissed her forehead. “Can you let me know the next time you don’t want to do something? I care about what you want, you deserve to have wants and desires.”
She fought to swallow the lump in her throat before nodding. “I love you, Makoto.”
He leant down to give her a hug. “I love you, too.”
She nuzzled his shoulder, breathing in the comfort and affection. “Can you stay with me for a bit?”
She felt his chuckling response in her hair. “Always.”