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The last trace of the sun setting down in the sky as it began to hide away for the rest of the day quickly stole Brandon’s attention.
Ozolog noticed this, as he usually did when anything became slightly different from his best friend— it had become an almost unconscious habit for him to notice even the smallest things about the other; the way he grew quieter at times or even somewhat more talkative with certain people around, most of those people being Ozo himself,— soon, he brushed a strand of hair off his own face as he took one step closer to Brandon, separating himself from the group of bantering teens behind him and placed a hand on his shoulder, almost immediately pulling the other away from the current subject of his undivided attention.
“Ah, Ozo…” Brandon’s voice was quiet and gentle like always; it held a contrast to his other friends’ voices. Most of them were still faintly squeaky, even after puberty had already hit them a while ago. Regardless, Ozolog’s eyes moved from Brandon’s back to his face as he turned around, the sky’s colors painting a beautiful orangeish hue on him. From Brandon’s perspective, Ozolog seemed flustered when his gaze finally landed upon him, and he could see how the sky casted the opposite shade on him. Ozolog’s lips were slightly open before he regained his composure and attempted to talk to Brandon without stuttering; “… Sony and Sparten— they’re going home now, so… I think we should, uhm, you know. I’ll… I'll take you home,” He was visibly struggling not to stumble upon his own words and showed hints of clear frustration at being unable to do so.
The other simply replied with a disappointed sound, but quickly tried to hide it and smiled at his dearest friend. The thought of going back home was not entirely pleasant to him; if he could, he would love to be with his friends in this place for the rest of the day. Still, he didn’t want to accidentally ‘dampen’ the mood.
“Then… let’s go. I think Dad is waiting for me,” Ozolog returned the smile at him as he heard his response.
Ozolog started walking towards the rest of the friend group, and, as everyone made their goodbyes and promises to see each other the next week, Brandon caught a glimpse of Sony’s fingers intertwined with Sparten’s as both of them walked away. Feeling a sensation of heavy anxiety tugging at his chest; Brandon kept following Ozolog behind and stuttered goodbyes to the rest of friends who had decided that they would stay there a few minutes more. Brandon could see that Sony held an even wider smile— wider than usual— as he held Sparten’s hand, however, was that not prohibited? those kind of affectionate behaviors were undoubtedly forbidden, and Brandon could never—and would never—dare to disobey any of the rules the Goods had set for him. He could not imagine himself smiling widely as Sony was if he did anything similar to that, simply thinking of the punishment that he would receive afterwards made him shiver.
Finally, they reached both of their bicycles. Ozolog had been given one for his 15th birthday and with small tasks he did over time, he had been able to save up enough to get Brandon one. Of course, Brandon insisted for almost a full week that he was not deserving of receiving something that had taken Ozolog so much effort and time, until finally realizing that Ozo would keep on insisting on him taking it and would not give into any of Brandon’s protests. Hopping onto his seat, Ozolog looked back at him; “Ready?”
He hesitated for a second before smiling and answering his question.
“… Yeah.”
Even for the time of the year, it was still a relatively warm day. It was also a relatively quiet moment between both of the boys.
Breaking the silence, Ozolog looked at his friend. “So, Brandon,” he continued. “Is… something on your mind? You’ve been just…” Ozo tried to find a way of wording things that did not feel too intrusive or as if Brandon was forced to tell him. “Quiet, I… I guess. Did something happen with your dad again?”
Looking down at the rocky path they had been pedaling on for a while, Brandon replied, almost hesitating doing so; “Yeah, It’s just—“
He was quickly interrupted by Ozolog falling off his bike and having his leg land first on a seemingly sharp rock. Calling out Ozo’s name and tossing the bicycle aside, Brandon quickly knelt down beside Ozolog. “Are you okay?” Brandon tried not to seem too nervous, which took everything in him.
A small crimson patch appeared on Ozolog’s knee, the place he had hit first when he fell. This only seemed to fuel Brandon’s nervousness in the situation. He mumbled apologies as Ozolog simply hissed in pain, trying to press his hand against the wound and making an attempt at standing up again, as a way to let Brandon know he was fine and did not need his assistance. Regardless, Brandon tried to aid him, but it currently seemed impossible; Cheer him up, at least…?
Ozolog was quick to finally stand up, but seemed to be basically dragging his injured leg across the floor. “It’s— fine. It’s fine, Brandon, this isn’t your fault,” Ozolog repeatedly assured him, and his best friend only saw one thing he could do to cheer him up…
Soon, Brandon helped the other on getting back on his bicycle, leading him towards it, but did not immediately do the same as he usually would. Instead, he held up Ozolog’s slightly scratched palm and held it against his own. Ozo’s touch was surprisingly cold and Brandon’s was clearly warmer. Even though he also had smaller hands than Ozo, it felt quite pleasant to do that.
“I saw Sony… I mean, Sparten! He— he, he did this to Sony. He seemed happy… I want to see you smile like that too, Ozo,” Brandon explained and almost seemed to show immediate regret upon saying the final part. “It’s… it’s not good to do things like that to another boy, I think... But, Ozo,” Brandon’s voice was almost breaking now. Had he made Ozolog uncomfortable? He was quiet now too… He had sinned for something he thought would have benefited both of them, but now…
Looking down in shame, Brandon’s eyesight had now been taken away by the tears which were forming in his eyes. He shut them tightly, ready to apologize, ready to get on his knees and beg for forgiveness— not entirely sure if he should apologize to his best friend or to the deities he pretended to love,— but then felt a small, soft peck on his cheek. Mwah.
Brandon felt his own face heat up now, and he gave Ozolog a surprised, long stare, with eyes still shining very clearly with tears that had been threatening to escape his eyes just a few seconds ago. “I also saw Sony do that to Sparten… Just to cheer him up, haaah..” Ozo spoke sheepishly.
After a while, still visibly flustered, Brandon was ready to leave with Ozolog and finally go home. Regardless, he suddenly stopped moving not even a minute after they had started pedaling once again. Brandon’s knuckles turned white as he gripped the handlebars in front of him. He didn’t do it out of anger, but rather out of the own shame he felt was beginning to build up deep within himself. Ozolog, as soon as he stopped hearing the quiet sounds the wheels made as they hit the rocks underneath, looked back at Brandon.
“Brandon… You didn’t get to tell me what was bothering you, but…”
“I’m going to die, Ozo.”
Ozolog couldn’t help but feel taken aback at the sudden statement.
”No, no you aren’t. Why would you die? It’s… it’s late, yeah. It is. It’s very late but— but I promise I’ll keep us safe,” His voice was clearly trying to provide comfort. “We… we have been out a lot of times before, nothing has ever happened to us, so…”
“I shouldn’t have done that, Ozo… It’s… not allowed, it was wrong of me. It was wrong, it was wrong of me to even hold you that close to me,”
Ozolog offered him a warm smile from afar before resuming his movement again.
“If… If you’re going to die because of that, then I will see you soon. There’s worse things than holding your best friend’s hand…” He murmured.
”… Just like kissing his cheek.”
…
Night had finally reached both of them, and Brandon had, although reluctantly, agreed to stay at Ozolog’s house. It was already late, and he could not take the risk of Brandon getting injured while he was completely alone. Now, both boys were lying down on the before-mentioned boy’s bed, and both of them could hear their soft breathing becoming gentler as time slowly passed by. Carefully, Ozolog laced his fingers with Brandon’s own, rubbing soft circles on his palm in an attempt to soothe him after the day they had just experienced together. As Ozolog could see Brandon’s eyelids become heavier, he pressed a gentle kiss on them before whispering to him;
“I love you, Brandon. No matter what happens, I want you to know that I love you very much.”
Liberating his free hand to tug Ozolog closer to his form, placing his head on the other’s chest, he let out a satisfied sigh and mumbled something back,
“I love you, Ozo.”
Brandon knew that no matter what the future held for both of them, Ozolog would protect him no matter what; just like now, with Ozolog wrapping an almost protective arm over his chest. Even if both of them were to die soon— Brandon felt proud of himself for thinking that he could die happily, he had already basked himself in his best friend’s warmth.
He had already experienced the privilege of being loved, of being cherished, of being innocently adored; and he knew that it was a privilege that no deity could take away from him.
It was a privilege that every deity longed for, but he had experienced it just by being himself.
By being Ozolog’s.