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Maura’s kitchen was loud in the way only the Rizzoli family could make it be. Pots clanked, the oven hummed, and somebody was always arguing about nothing. Angela stood at the stove like a general, wooden spoon in hand, eyeing her sons like they’re underperforming recruits. “Alright, I’ve been thinking,” Angela announced, which immediately made Jane groan from the table.
“Oh boy,” Jane muttered, not even looking up from her phone. “This is how it starts.”
Tommy leaned back in his chair. “Ma, every time you say that, it costs me dignity.”
Frankie pointed at him. “Or money.”
Angela glared dramatically. “Excuse me for wanting something nice for my family!”
Maura, seated politely with perfect posture, tilted her head. “Statistically speaking, ‘something nice’ tends to precede a subjective evaluation—”
“Maura, honey,” Angela cut in, softer now, “you’re already something nice. You’re a doctor.”
That got everyone’s attention immediately, the three Rizzoli kids immediately knowing where this was going.
“Oh no…” Jane breathed.
Angela pointed her spoon at Tommy first. “You see this? This is what I’m talking about. A doctor in the family. Respectable. Stable. Knows how to pronounce half the words I can’t.”
Maura smiled faintly, still not catching on. “I can assist with pronunciation if—”
Angela waved her off affectionately. “You already assist by existing, sweetheart.”
Frankie snorted. “So what’s the plan, Ma? Kidnap her?”
Angela ignored him and zeroed in on Tommy again. “Thomas Rizzoli.”
Tommy froze. “Uh-oh. Full name.”
“You,” Angela said, tapping the spoon in his direction, “should really think about making an honest woman out of her.”
There was a beat of silence followed by a collective choking sound coming from Jane, Frankie, and Tommy. “MA!”
Maura’s eyebrows lifted, intrigued rather than shocked. “I wasn’t aware there was a pending proposal scenario.”
Frankie burst out laughing. “Oh my God, Ma, you’re just assigning wives now?”
Angela threw her hands up. “I’m just saying! She’s beautiful, she’s brilliant, she brings baked goods that don’t come from a box, no offense, Janie.”
Jane rolled her eyes. “Oh, none taken.”
Maura, still calm, folded her hands in her lap. “For clarity, Angela, are you suggesting a legally binding union based primarily on my medical degree?”
Angela leaned in, dead serious for a split second. “It doesn’t hurt.”
Tommy rubbed his face. “Ma, Maura’s my sister’s-”
“Best friend, yes, I know,” Angela cut in, clearly not actually knowing what Tommy had been going to say. “And look how well that worked out! She’s practically family already.”
Jane shook her head. “No. Nope. Hard no. We are not doing this to her.”
Frankie grinned. “I mean… Thanksgiving would be easier.”
Jane glared at him. “You’re not helping.”
Angela pivoted suddenly, pointing at Frankie now. “Fine! Then you! Francesco-”
Frankie raised both hands. “Whoa, whoa, I’m not getting drafted into this!”
Maura considered them both thoughtfully. “From a genetic diversity standpoint, neither option is particularly advisable.”
Tommy squinted. “Is that a no?”
“It’s a scientifically informed hesitation,” Maura replied with a sheepish smile.
Jane smirked. “Translation? Hell no she doesn’t want to marry you Thomas.”
Angela sighed dramatically and placed a hand over her heart. “All I want is one doctor in the family and maybe a nice wedding. Is that so much to ask?”
Jane leaned back. “You have a doctor in the family. You just didn’t give birth to her.”
Angela softened and looked at Maura. “That’s true.”
Maura smiled gently at Jane, her heart fluttering, and then to Angela. “I don’t mind being an honorary addition.”
Angela brightened instantly. “See? She’s perfect! Are you sure none of you want to marry her?”
“MA,” Jane and both her brothers yelled in unison, their thick Boston accents coming out full force.
Jane shook her head after a moment and smirked. “Also, quick question? Why aren’t you asking me to make an honest woman out of her?” She asked in what sounded like a joke but everyone knew it likely was not.
Angela paused and honest to god considered that.
Maura turned to Jane and smiled curiously, shimming her shoulders a bit playfully. “Is that an offer?”
Jane immediately backtracked and laughed. “Conversation is over.”
Frankie grinned. “Too late, Janie. Maura’s evaluating you now.”
Maura nodded slightly. “I would need more data before I said yes.”
Angela clapped her hands, delighted. “Oh, now this I like!”
Jane stood up and grabbed her jacket. “I’m leaving. I’m actually leaving this house. It was a joke!”
Angela called after her, “Think about it! A nice ceremony, maybe some flowers!”
Jane headed for the door. “I deal with dead bodies all day, Ma, and this conversation is still somehow worse!”
The door slammed shut and there was a moment of silence that followed. Angela shrugged and turned back to the stove. “Alright, who wants pasta?”
Tommy raised his hand. “I’ll eat. But I’m not getting married.”
Frankie nodded. “Same.”
Maura lifted her hand slightly. “I’ll have pasta. Marriage to Jane remains undetermined.”
Angela smiled, satisfied enough, for now.
The front door creaked open again barely two minutes later and Jane poked her head back in, trying, and failing, to look like she didn’t just storm out. “…Did you save me any pasta?”
Angela didn’t even turn around. “Oh, look who came back. Miss ‘I’m leaving this house forever.’”
Frankie grinned from his spot at the dining table. “That was fast.”
Tommy checked an imaginary watch as he took his own seat. “New record.”
Jane walked in having shrugged her jacket off, already grabbing a plate. “I was gone long enough to prove a point.”
“No, you weren’t,” Frankie and Tommy said at once.
Maura watched her with a small, amused smile. “Hunger tends to override principled exits.”
Jane picked up a fork and pointed it at her. “Don’t analyze me while I’m eating.”
Angela served Jane some pasta. “Sit. Eat. Maybe marriage will sound better on a full stomach.”
Jane glared before she took her plate and settled into a chair next to Maura. “It’s not gonna sound better ever.”
Maura tilted her head, genuinely thoughtful. “I wouldn’t dismiss it outright. Historically, many successful partnerships begin under unconventional circumstances.”
Jane squinted at her. “You’re… considering this?”
Tommy choked on his drink. “Oh my god, she’s considering this.”
Frankie leaned forward, delighted. “Maura, please walk us through your thought process.”
Maura set down her fork and spoke thoughtfully, completely serious. “Well, Jane and I already demonstrate strong interpersonal compatibility. We communicate frequently, we trust each other in high-stress situations, and our cohabitation during certain cases has been easy.”
Jane blinked. “We do not cohabitate. I crash at your place when I’m too tired to drive.”
“Which statistically occurs with notable frequency,” Maura replied with a slight smirk.
Angela turned, absolutely glowing. “You hear that? Easy! That’s what I’m talking about!”
Jane dragged a hand down her face. “Ma, no. You don’t get to turn my friendship into a case study for marriage.”
Frankie nudged Tommy. “Honestly, they already act like a married couple.”
Tommy nodded in agreement. “Yeah, minus the part where they admit it.”
Jane pointed her fork at both of them. “I will arrest you. I don’t know for what yet, but I’ll find something.”
Maura looked at Jane, still calm but now clearly intrigued. “For the record, I’m not opposed in principle. Marriage can offer legal and financial benefits, as well as medical decision-making authority.”
Jane quirked her eyebrow and gave Maura a look. “You’re listing perks. That’s not romantic, that’s a tax seminar.”
Angela waved a hand. “Romance comes later! First you lock it down.”
Jane stared at her mother now, her mouth slightly open. Everyone at this table was nuts. “I can’t believe that just came out of your face.”
Maura leaned slightly closer to Jane. “Would you object strongly to a hypothetical evaluation?”
Jane narrowed her eyes. “Define ‘evaluation.’”
“A structured assessment of compatibility factors,” Maura said as if this was normal conversation. “Nothing binding.”
Frankie was fully invested now. “Oh, this is happening. This is definitely happening.”
Tommy raised his glass. “To the world’s most scientific marriage proposal.”
Jane groaned but she was smiling despite herself, feeling a bit punch drunk at this point. “I came back for pasta. That’s it. I am not getting married because I was hungry.”
Maura considered that. “Nutritional states do influence decision-making.”
Jane leaned back and shook her head with a chuckle. “Maura. Eat your pasta.”
Maura gave her a playful look before she did as told.
There was brief, peaceful moment as everyone actually ate before Angela spoke casually. “So… fall wedding or spring?”
Jane dropped her fork to her plate with a clatter. “MA!”
Frankie laughed. “I’m saying spring. Better photos.”
Tommy nodded. “Yeah, less chance of snow.”
Maura looked between them, thoughtful. “Spring would be favorable.”
“I hate all of you,” Jane grumbled as she picked up the fork and shoved more pasta in her mouth.
Angela smiled sweetly. “You love us.”
Jane didn’t deny that because it was true.
After dinner, the space had finally quieted down. Angela, Tommy, and Frankie migrated to the couch, all arguing about something pointless. The clatter of dishes and running water filled the rest of the space.
Jane stood at the sink, sleeves rolled up, aggressively scrubbing a plate like it personally offended her. “This is how it starts,” she muttered. “First it’s pasta, then it’s hypothetical marriages, next thing you know I’m registered at some store I’ve never heard of.”
A second pair of hands appeared beside her, calmly reaching for a towel.
Maura.
“Wedding registries are often created several months after an engagement,” she said, drying a dish with precise care.
Jane snorted and shook her head. “You’re not helping.”
“I’m not attempting to help,” Maura replied softly. “I’m attempting to clarify. I meant what I said.”
Jane glanced at her now. “About what, exactly?”
“Our compatibility.”
Jane rolled her eyes, but there’s less bite in it. “You’re really sticking with this, huh?”
Maura nodded slightly. “Yes,” she said as she set a plate aside, then continued, calm and thoughtful, like she was presenting a case. “We have complementary skill sets. You are highly intuitive and action-oriented, while I am analytical and detail-focused. This creates balance in both professional and personal scenarios.”
Jane shook her head again. “We’re talking about solving crimes, not picking out curtains.”
“The underlying dynamics are transferable,” Maura said with a soft smile.
Jane huffed a quiet laugh despite herself. “Of course they are.”
Maura continued, unfazed. “We also demonstrate high levels of mutual trust. You routinely place yourself in dangerous situations with the expectation that I will support you. And I do.”
Jane’s hands slowed slightly at that. “Yeah…”
“And,” Maura added, a little softer now, “you extend that same trust to me in non-professional contexts. You seek my presence when you’re distressed or fatigued. And, of course…I trust you with my life. You’re the first person I would turn to if I was feeling any strong emotion, the good and the bad ones.”
Jane shrugged, trying to play it off, but hearing those words did make her smile.
“We also spend a significant amount of voluntary time together,” Maura continued. “Meals, social events, even leisure activities that are not case-related.”
Jane smirked. “You mean when you drag me to fancy things and I complain the whole time?”
“You still attend,” Maura pointed out with a growing smile. “And you make efforts to engage with my interests, even when they are outside your comfort zone.”
Jane gestured vaguely with the sponge. “Alright, fine. So we don’t kill each other and we hang out a lot. That doesn’t mean we should get married.”
“I didn’t say it necessitated marriage,” Maura replied. “Only that it supports the possibility.”
Jane exhaled through her nose and shook her head. “You going to make a chart, aren’t you?”
“Probably,” Maura said softly. She studied Jane for a moment, the way she went back to washing dishes with a laugh. “Does it bother you that much?”
Jane handed Maura a plate. “The chart?”
“The idea,” Maura clarified, her voice a little less sure now, as she took the plate and started to dry it. “The idea of marrying me.”
Jane shut the water off and paused for a moment before she leaned back against the counter and looked at her. “It’s just…a new thought. It doesn’t bother me to think about being married to you… and that’s what’s weird. It should but it doesn’t…. God, I might need that chart after all,” she said with a gentle smile, nudging Maura.
Maura’s smile returned softly and she blushed a bit as she finished drying the dish.
*
Maura’s living room was quiet in that distinctly Maura way with its soft lighting and the faintest hint of classical music humming in the background. Jane sat on the couch, one ankle hooked over her knee, holding a single sheet of paper like it was evidence in a trial. “You color-coded it.”
Maura who was seated beside her but just far enough to be proper about it, nodded. “It improves readability.”
Jane scanned it again, her lips twitching upwards. “Emotional compatibility, communication efficiency, shared values-” She glanced up, amused. “You really did this.”
“You said you needed it,” Maura replied calmly.
“I was joking,” Jane said fondly.
Maura shrugged. “Well, I was not.”
Jane huffed a quiet laugh and looked back down. “Yeah, no, I’m seeing that.”
There was small pause as Jane actually read it and her expression shifted, just a little, from amused to thoughtful. “You put ‘trust under pressure’ at the top,” she said softy.
“It seemed most significant.”
Another pause happened before Jane tapped the paper lightly. “And ‘emotional reliance.’ That sounds intense.”
Maura folded her hands neatly and nodded. “It is not intended to be a negative thing.”
Jane glanced at her and smiled warmly. “I didn’t say it was. Alright. This is very thorough. Honestly, kind of impressive.”
Maura tilted her head and smiled a bit, sensing a ‘but’ coming from Jane’s tone. “However?”
Jane smirked faintly. “However you’re missing something.”
Maura’s brow furrowed just slightly. “Missing?”
Jane nodded, lowering the paper. “Yeah. Big thing. Kind of important for, you know, marriage.”
Maura shifted her attention fully to her. “What is it?”
Jane gestured vaguely between them. “This.”
Maura glanced down briefly, then back up. “You’ll need to be more specific.”
Jane sighed, a little amused and a little exasperated. “Physical stuff,” she clarified. “You’ve got all this-” she tapped the page again, “-but you skipped the part where people actually, I don’t know… cross that line.”
Maura watched her carefully. “Define ‘cross that line.’”
Jane raised her eyebrows and gave her a look. “Maura.”
“I prefer clarity,” Maura replied with a tiny smile.
Jane shook her head, but she was smiling a little too. “I mean we’ve never…” She gestured again, more awkwardly this time. “We’ve never even kissed let alone had sex. That’s kind of a big factor. You can’t exactly build a marriage on charts and proximity.”
Maura considered that, completely serious. “That is a valid omission.”
Jane nodded and snorted. “Yeah, it is.”
There’s a brief pause in which Jane looked back down at the paper, like she was about to make another joke, but she didn’t get the chance because before she can speak again, Maura leaned in, closed the space between them, and kissed her.
It was not rushed but not clinical either. Just very deliberate. Gentle but certain.
Jane froze for exactly half a second and then, to her surprise, she kissed her back. It was brief but it was real.
When they pulled apart, the room felt even quieter than before and Jane blinked a few times, staring at her. “…Okay.”
Maura studied her expression, searching. “Was that sufficient for evaluative purposes?”
Jane let out a short, disbelieving laugh. “You just- you don’t- you don’t just ease into anything, do you?”
“You identified a missing variable,” Maura said simply. “I addressed it. If you take your pants off, I can address the other,” she said with a slight smirk.
Jane laughed, actually laughed, as she shook her head. “You’re gonna need to update the chart.”
Maura smiled even more. “Of course.”
Jane leaned back into the couch, a little dazed, a little amused. “Add a column or something.”
Maura licked her lips as she watched her like a shark. “I will.”
Jane glanced at her again, softer now. “For the record? That was not a bad start.”
Maura’s expression warmed just slightly. “You’re saying I’m a good kisser?”
Jane smirked as she folded the paper in half. “Maybe. I’m still not marrying you because of a spreadsheet.”
They both couldn’t help but laugh at that.
*
The kitchen was loud. It always was when the Rizzolis gathered. Chairs scraping, someone laughing too loudly, Frankie arguing with Tommy about something that didn’t matter, and Angela orchestrating everything like a general who refused to retire.
Jane leaned against the counter, arms crossed, as she watched it all with the tired affection of someone who had seen this exact chaos a thousand times and still loved it.
Maura stood beside her, calm as ever, handing Angela a serving dish she didn’t ask for but would absolutely be using.
Angela took it without looking. “Perfect. Thank you.”
Maura smiled and nodded as she walked around Jane, her hand rubbing along her back briefly. Maura moved through the kitchen with practiced ease, checking temperatures, adjusting a dish in the oven by exactly one centimeter, Jane watched her, amused and completely in love.
“You’re still doing that thing,” Jane said with affection.
Maura glanced over. “Which thing?”
“The ‘this plate is emotionally unbalanced’ thing.”
“It was slightly uneven,” Maura replied with a grin.
“She’s precious, you leave my daughter alone!” Angela said to Jane, waving a spoon at her.
Jane raised her hands in the air in surrender. “I know, I know, no one can tease your precious Maura.”
Maura stood up and closed the oven before she walked over to Jane, one hand sliding along her abdomen, the other up along her back as she kissed her cheek. “Mmm, I do believe I am your precious Maura.”
Jane smirked as she looked at her wife and kissed her lips tenderly but briefly, not wanting to hear any shit from her brothers who had taken every opportunity over the last couple of years to whistle every time she and Maura had kissed. One would think they would be over the fact two married people kissed by now. “You are.”
Angela was watching them with the fondest expression. “Well, it only took you long enough but I did finally get a doctor in the family!”