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This day is one that Endo has been looking forward to. The dorayaki shop a walking distance from their house is releasing their fall flavors. Takiishi and him will probably be leaving the house some time this afternoon though, since Takiishi stayed up late yesterday binge watching some movie series that had 5 sequels.
Endo would’ve watched them all with him, but he fell asleep 10 minutes into the first movie. Something about the soundtrack was just trying to lull his eyes into closing. He awoke that morning to Takiishi using his stomach as a pillow, and carried his slumbering housemate to their bed for proper rest.
They left the house by 14:37 since Takiishi wanted to eat burgers for ‘breakfast’. It’s in the opposite direction of the dorayaki shop, but if that's what Takiishi wants, then there’s no way Endo would ever refuse him.
Upon their first step into the restaurant, they’re immediately hit with the distinct smell of the oil that’s being used to fry the food, seasonings, and ketchup. It’s a scent that Endo has come to familiarize himself with after so many years of taking Takiishi out to eat.
Endo taps the self-ordering kiosk while Takiishi hovers beside him, “So what kinda burger do you want?”
“Double-cheese burger,” Takiishi answers quickly.
“Alright!” Endo responds as he adds the burger into their cart, “And the usual 15 piece chicken nuggets, large fries, and Fanta grape?”
“Yes.”
Endo’s hands move with a casualness that could only be built from muscle memory and repetition as he customizes each item — no ketchup, no mustard, no lettuce, onions, pickles, tomatoes — and inserts them into the cart. Getting a chicken teriyaki burger for himself, he pays and gets their order number.
Endo chatters about everything and nothing to fill in the silence. He would believe he was talking at Takiishi instead of to him if it weren’t for the occasion ‘Mm’s and ‘Hm?’s.
Their food arrives as quickly as the label ‘fast food’ suggests, and they eat in casual quietude. Meals are probably the only time the air around them isn’t vibrating with the sound of Endo’s never-ending list of things to say. It is instead occupied by the bustling of the restaurant. A group of friends laughing too loud at a joke only they would understand, the almost inaudible sizzle coming from the kitchen, the convergence of voices and noise in every direction that transforms into muffles. Not talking sometimes isn’t so bad.
After taking the last bite of his teriyaki burger, Endo wraps up his empty foil paper, and watches Takiishi as he eats his chicken nuggets and fries. Half-way through the container of fries, he slides it over to Endo, who munches on them with his eyes still glued to Takiishi.
Takiishi always says he wants the large fries even when Endo suggested getting a smaller size if he’s always planning to just eat half. Endo was brushed off with cold eyes and a set jaw, so he never mentions it ever again.
When there’s nothing left on the tray, Endo goes to put it up to be washed and throws away their trash, before returning to the table.
“Let’s go get our dessert then go home, yeah? The shop might close up soon if we don’t hurry.”
Takiishi stands up and begins walking towards the exit and to the dorayaki shop they’re supposed to already be at by now.
Endo quickly catches up to Takiishi and matches his pace.
“We left the house pretty early so it should be alright even if we take our time,” Endo comments to Takiishi, who in response, slows his speed-walking. Endo stuffs his hand into his coat pocket, retrieving his phone and swiping open the confectionary store’s online menu.
“What flavors are you gonna get? They’re advertising new pumpkin and persimmon flavored fillings. And a new batter option with maple syrup too. Any of those sound good to you?”
“I’ll get the persimmon with the new batter then. And a normal chocolate one.”
“I’ll get the pumpkin and classic red bean filling then!”
Takiishi’s ordered two dorayakis, but knowing him he’ll still be craving another after finishing both. He likes the red bean paste from this shop, so he’ll definitely be happy to eat it.
“I’ve been waiting for this pumpkin flavor to be released all week,” Endo idly chatters, “They posted the autumn menu last Monday, and it sounded so good! It’s always nice to look at seasonal flavors whenever the seasons change. It’s really a genius marketing strategy — ya get an influx of customers year round.”
“Last year, every cafe and bakery had that crazy mushroom flavor! I tried it just for the experience, but to my surprise, it was a decent combination! If you remember, I really wanted you to try it, but then you kicked me for being pushy and I dropped the whole dorayaki onto the cement… Maybe next year you’ll change your mind?” Hopeful green eyes wishfully glance at Takiishi, optimistic that he would be open to it.
Meeting these sparkling eyes, Takiishi pauses several notes too long before averting his gaze and responding noncommittally, “I’ll think about it. A year from now is too far away to tell how I’ll be feeling.”
His answer acts as fertilizer for the smile blooming on Endo’s face, “You really will?! Actually?!”
Takiishi doesn’t answer any further.
Taking the lack of follow-up as acceptance, Endo giggles to himself as he imagines what kind of reaction Takiishi would have to it. Despite how good he thinks it was, people’s opinions were actually very divided. Online, it was like the child of the mint chocolate controversy. You either love it enough for it to be your favorite flavor, or hate it enough to judge everyone for stuffing themselves with ‘toothpaste’. In the mushroom dorayaki’s case, it was ‘stuffing yourself with fungus’ — which was leagues worse than ‘toothpaste’ — but mushroom enthusiasts stood by their preferences with honor and pride.
With mint chocolate, Takiishi doesn’t like it, but Endo does, so there’s currently a half eaten bucket of it sitting in the freezer. It’s been his late night snack for the last two weeks. Watching him eat must’ve made his housemate crave ice cream by osmosis, so there’s a tub of neopolitan in the freezer next to the mint chocolate.
Endo carries on, shoving another topic into the silence, “Should probably order online while we’re walking there. I dunno how long the line might be, and you’re gonna get annoyed with waiting.”
While entering their order, the taller leans against Takiishi until their arms are touching to use him as a guide. Takiishi knows the way there after they’ve traversed the same streets to the same destination so many times, so there’s no need to worry about him confidently leading them to the middle of nowhere.
Even while filling out a form, Endo continues talking, “Imma stop by that one fragrance boutique on the way back to restock our shampoo, ya wanna come with?”
From his peripheral vision, Endo sees red bangs fall before bouncing back up.
“Alright!” More time I get to spend with Takiishi!! “Let’s browse some other stuff too while we’re there then!”
“Endo Yamato,” Takiishi calls from beside me, “I want the apple scented shampoo from earlier this year. I’m getting tired of the flowers.”
A head of curly hair hesitantly lifts up, “Unfortunately… that was a limited edition winter version…” Endo answers sheepishly. It’s unclear whether the unease in his chest is due to fear or simply his heart jumping at hearing a deity’s voice form his name.
“We can find another fruity shampoo though if you want! The selection’s huge, and it’s not often you find something you don’t like. Besides, it’d be more exciting to try something different, right?” Endo quickly followed up after announcing his inability to fulfill Takiishi’s request.
Takiishi doesn’t pause his step — which is a positive sign. Phew…
“Find me something even better then.”
“Of course I will! I only buy the best for you, Takiishi! How could I ever let you settle for something inferior?” Making Takiishi of all people be satisfied with less than what he wants is something Endo could never in his life imagine doing.
Even after Endo finishes filling out the ordering page and is perfectly capable of directing himself, he continues to press his weight onto Takiishi’s arm. Takiishi has either gotten too used to the pressure to notice, or doesn’t care enough for it to be considered a bother. Endo would feel a tad bit guilty for taking advantage of the situation, but the flipping and fluttering in his stomach is far too distracting.
After a few minutes of the most blissful stroll of Endo’s life, they arrive at the dorayaki shop.
It’s a little bakery in the middle of a quaint street. A sandwich board is placed out on the sidewalk in front of the sliding doors. Plants and other types of foliage dot the place in a nature-ry vibe. Only some of the tables are occupied by customers. Two students are using this place as a study spot while a couple uses it as the site of their date.
Endo and Takiishi approach the front counter.
“Hello, what can I get for you today?” The cashier greets.
“Hi! We’ve already placed our orders online a little while ago,” Endo answers, with a casual and light tone while rummaging through his coat pocket.
“Gimme a second,” he says while pulling up the order number on his phone.
When the screen displays the page confirming that their order has been recorded, Endo turns it towards the worker, declaring what can obviously be seen, “We’re number 465!”
“If it’s not ready yet, we can take a seat and wait,” a tattooed thumb fluidly gestures to the table by the window.
The cashier taps at the POS system, her eyes darting back and forth, “465… 465… Ah! Here it is! We just packaged that order a minute ago. I’ll go get that for you real quick.” The cashier retreats into the back to retrieve their desserts.
Endo smiles, glad that Takiishi and him won’t have to wait for any amount of time at all.
He turns to Takiishi, “Looks like we’re lucky today.”
“We’re not lucky, they just don’t have a lot of customers,” Takiishi bluntly states.
Endo chuckles, “I guess we’re lucky year-round then.”
The girl who left comes back after a few seconds with their dorayaki in a paper bag. If she heard any part of their conversation, she doesn’t show any indication of it in her face nor tone.
“Just to make sure, you ordered persimmon, chocolate, pumpkin, and red bean dorayakis, correct?” She lists off while reading the ticket.
“Sounds right to me!”
“Alright, that’ll be 1,320 yen. Would you like to pay with cash or card?”
“Card,” Endo replies, taking out his wallet.
The cashier girl presses a couple buttons on her screen before the tablet in front of Endo lights up with an indication to ‘Tap, Insert, or Swipe’.
Endo taps his card, and after the small beep, the receipt starts printing out.
The girl hands him both the receipt and paper bag before bowing, “Thank you for buying from us! Come back again soon!” She thanks cheerfully.
Endo takes the contents from her hands and turns around, waving as he offers her a smile, “Thank you! Bye bye!”
Leaving through the entrance doors, Endo digs hands into the bag and passes Takiishi his persimmon dorayaki. Its warmth seeps through to Endo’s hands, making the cold that rushes back feel even colder.
Takiishi accepts it, curling his fingers around the individual pastry’s paper wrapping. He unfurls it and bites into the soft castella pancakes. Steam erupts from the exposed red-orange colored paste and wisps over Takiishi’s face.
“Mm… Hmmph,” Takiishi muffles.
Endo doesn’t think he’s saying anything, but it’s unmistakably evidence of his contentment.
Endo laughs teasingly, “Heheh, ya sure look happy…” a thumb brushes over crumbs sticking to skin, “Come on, let’s go get our shampoo or we won’t be able to shower tonight.” It’s an exaggeration, but Takiishi probably wouldn’t know that.
It might be because some part of Endo’s subconscious judges Takiishi’s mood to be good enough to overlook his audacity, or maybe his intrusive thoughts won out against reason, but his finger tips brazenly reach out to loosely hook onto Takiishi’s.
Endo constantly compares Takiishi to a raging inferno, but in these moments when he’s able to touch him without any good motives, it genuinely feels like he’s thrown himself in to be used as fuel for the ever burning flame that is Takiishi.
Not sensing any resistance or rejection, Endo grows more daring. His hand glides up against Takiishi’s palms and clasps, connecting them. It was all done quickly, like ripping off a bandaid. As if speed could make the current circumstances less frightening. As if the anticipation was for the action itself and not for the reaction it would garner. Which is all to say, the speed served no purpose except revealing Endo’s nervousness.
Endo touches Takiishi quite often. It’s not like physical contact was strange between them — they slept together in the same bed, shared the same bath and shower — but perhaps it’s because this action serves no beneficial purpose. Nothing he could use to explain in an acceptable way why he's doing it. The only reason behind this foolish act is wholly selfish. Right now, Endo isn’t touching Takiishi to clean him like he could justify in the bath, nor touching Takiishi to keep him warm and comfortable under their blankets.
Nothing horrible happens in response to his bold behavior though. Takiishi hasn’t ripped his hand out of Endo’s and curb stomped him. Nor backhanded him, nor punched his face in, nor kicked a fracture into his legs.
Takiishi hasn’t pulled away at all.
Endo might’ve just used up a whole year’s worth of luck, and is in for a world of pain and suffering starting tomorrow onwards.
His own voice whispers in the back of his head, but I wanna push it a little more…
Pushing down that delusional train of thought, Endo begins walking in the direction of the fragrance boutique, Takiishi trailing a half-step behind him.
If Endo was capable of critical thinking right now… If Endo was capable of doing anything at all right now aside from walking on autopilot and relying on muscle memory… If Endo was capable of being present inside of his own body instead of purely his right hand… Actually— he couldn’t even do that— because if he did have sensation over his right hand, he would know that nerves were seeping out of him through his palms, and his and Takiishi’s hands feel like they’ve been dunked in a river.
However, hypothetically, if he were capable of critical thinking, he would have noticed that despite all this, Takiishi hadn’t yet pulled away. His perfectly manicured hand remained securely in Endo’s.
In this silence, Takiishi didn’t speak up once and simply chose to eat his dorayaki in silence. Which was understandable considering that one look at Endo and anybody could tell he was in no condition to talk.
The silence persisted until Endo was able to regain consciousness over himself. The first thing he detected was the state of his hands, but he wasn’t going to speak up about it and ruin this if Takiishi wasn’t going to. How is he putting up with this though????
“Here, trash?” Endo tilted the bag of dorayakis towards Takiishi and motioned for him to put the empty wrapper inside. Takiishi placed the dorayaki-less paper in the bag and grabbed another pastry.
This one was less hot than the last due to the heat escaping into the cool air. It still retained a great amount of warmth due to Endo holding it so close to his chest and his natural heat coating the pancake sandwich.
Takiishi finishes this dorayaki much quicker, not wanting the coldness of the evening to rob away the warmth enveloping his tongue
“The chocolate filling is still the best after all,” Takiishi comments aloud as he swallows the last bite.
“Good thing they have it every day of the year then, huh?” Endo grins.
“Mm. That is convenient.”
“Do you still want another?” Endo asks, already facing the bag’s opening to Takiishi for him to take the red bean filled dessert, “I got the red bean for you since I knew you’d still be hungry.”
Takiishi’s eyes flick to the bag before they come back to their focus on the street, “Later, we’re here already.”
“Oh! We are,” Endo blinks with mild shock at the sight of their destination already in view.
They stop in front of the store and Endo opens the door for Takiishi while clumsily balancing the paper bag with the same arm.
When they’ve both entered, Endo is reluctant to let go of Takiishi, but they do need both hands if they’re actually going to get any shopping done. Not that Endo would mind not restocking their shampoo if it meant he could keep holding Takiishi’s hand. Alas, Takiishi probably would though, so they have to be productive here.
The icy air that rushes in to fill the gap created between them feels like the discomfort of being drenched in ice water. Gone was the warmth that accompanied him.
Takiishi directly strode towards the bathroom products in quick but leisurely strides. Endo followed closely behind, nabbing a shopping basket off the neat stack of them by the entrance.
Takiishi skimmed the scent labels above each section of shampoo bottles, before picking up one that interested him and smelling the contents. Endo did the same, except he opened every single available option. He didn’t want to miss a potential gem just because the designers chose a boring name and the descriptor was uninteresting.
When he found an appealing fragrance, he would turn to Takiishi to seek his approval. After the 14th bottle, Takiishi finally found one he liked. A fig, caramel, and amber scent-base with citrus orange notes. It smelled deliciously comforting. Takiishi dropped the bottle into the white basket and took off for the perfume segment of the store.
Takiishi usually doesn’t wear perfume, so it’s out of the norm for him to seek it out. But if Takiishi wants to start getting into it, Endo will encourage his new interest as best as he can. Endo is an expert after all, so who better than him to help Takiishi find a perfume that would compliment him?
Takiishi pops open the flacon’s cap from a glass decanter with a design that resembles an emerald cut. He raises it and takes a sniff of the aroma exuding from the nozzle. He looks back at Endo and tugs him closer by the wrist over the fabric of his coat, then bunches up his cashmere sleeve to expose the pulse point.
A spritz is applied to the area of his inner wrist, and the fragrance travels up from below, reaching his nose. It was an elegant and deep, yet refreshing and clean scent. A strong agarwood and leather base, with notes of a bergamot undertone. The bergamot lingered like an aftertaste, leading you to continue chasing the scent as it dissipates after the initial whiff. Takiishi tended to gravitate towards warmer fragrances, so this refreshing and cool combination on him would make for a rather incongruous picture. It’s a shame that the scent is so pleasant, but there’s plenty more to choose from.
Takiishi lifts the perfumed wrist and takes a deep inhale. On Endo, the bergamot notes start to become more pronounced, and the leather cuts through the citrus much more smoothly, maintaining harmony. Endo’s heart rate picks up as he watches Takiishi, resulting in his body warming up and diffusing the perfume further into the air.
“This one smells really good! Our body chemistry is different though, so it’s not gonna smell the same on me as it would on you,” Endo advises, “Here, try it on your wrist instead.” Endo reaches for Takiishi’s hand but is batted away.
“It’s obviously not for me.”
“Oh.”
It’s the first time Endo has ever heard such a sentiment from Takiishi.
Takiishi is buying something for someone else? Takiishi is going out of his way to think about and care for another person? He can think about someone outside of himself enough to want to get them a gift? Affection and care was something that Takiishi could dole out?
Endo’s eyes contract and it feels like his heart and lungs do too. All the blood circulating to and from his heart turns to frost.
Endo could handle getting hit when his actions are misinterpreted as getting in Takiishi’s way — that’s become easy and Endo doesn’t even flinch anymore. Endo could handle the only thing exciting enough to get Takiishi out of his slump being the thought of fighting that fucking creep. Endo could handle repressing his own jealousy to make him happy. Endo could handle being nothing more to Takiishi than just someone who brings him things he likes, someone who bends and bows to his every whim — hell, he was already making peace with the idea of being someone who would never be acknowledged by Takiishi, but staying by his side nevertheless for rest of his life that night on the rooftop of Furin. But this… Isn’t this too much? It’s unfair that Endo would still watch every step of this process though, unable to drag his eyes away from this new side of Takiishi. It’s cruel that Endo is going to have to pay for this gift, but it’s also comforting that the money isn’t being supplied by Takiishi.
That this gift would not entirely be from Takiishi is the only consoling factor that Endo can cling to. No, it is not the thought that counts.
Just as the world around him from the tiles beneath his feet to the bottles of scented alcohol and water start cracking at the edges, Takiishi speaks up. “It suits you,” he observes aloud as he picks a sealed box with that perfume off the shelf and adds it to the basket.
“Oh. It’s for me?” Endo questions, disbelief, hope, and relief tinging his tone. His heart has stopped its endeavor to suffocate itself. His lungs have expanded and filled up with air the way they're supposed to. His blood has liquidized and is flowing smoothly again.
The world appears to gain more color and liveliness to it. Everything seemed brighter, like there was optimism, sunshine, and ‘happily ever after’s waiting at every corner.
“Yes. This one smells like the kind of fragrance you would have,” Takiishi answers, “It would be nice to have this scent around.”
Right, of course this benefits Takiishi in some way. Endo’s showered and spoiled him with so many gifts that there’s absolutely no way in hell he can comprehend the idea of gift giving anymore. Endo can be a human candle that improves the scent of the air he breathes in if that’s what Takiishi wants. That Takiishi thinks he smells so nice feels like indirect praise.
“Ok! If you want it, let’s get it!” Endo beams, blush bloom high on his cheeks. The almost-flattery is euphoria inducing.
“Don’t you want to find one for yourself too though? It feels like the kinda thing you would like,” Endo ponders verbally.
Takiishi pauses, thinking about the question.
Seeing as he’s on the fence, Endo approaches another tester perfume bottle a few steps away from where they currently stand, and frees the atomizer from its capped confines. He hurries back to where Takiishi is standing while staring at him and sets the bag of dorayakis down. Inked fingers tug at the cuffs of a wool cardigan until blue and green veins are unveiled. Applying pressure to the atomizer unleashes sandalwood, ginger, and smoke onto pale skin. Endo lowers his face to level with Takiishi’s wrist and deeply inhales the mixture of Takiishi’s natural skin and earthy ash. It’s pleasant.
Endo extends it over to Takiishi for his assent. From the lackluster reception, even if he does find it agreeable, it’s clearly nothing noteworthy. That’s too bad… Endo would’ve loved to chase after this scent all day long as they walked side-by-side.
Endo returns the bottle to its original resting place and procures a new sampler. This time, moss, pine, patchouli, and peach. Disinterest could not be more easily detected in those golden eyes.
Running out of wrists, Endo pulls aside the cardigan’s placket and sprays on Takiishi’s elbow. Black tea, condensed milk, burnt sugar, and lilies. Shoving his nose into the crook of Takiishi’s elbow, Endo thinks it smells delectably divine. Takiishi perks up a tad bit more (or is it a jolt?), but the reaction is still too muted to signify approval. He looks to be distracted by something else, his eyes averted and cloudy instead of focused. Definitely not a sign of approval.
Maple, white chocolate, macadamia, and honey. This one truly builds the illusion of a banquet of sweet desserts. Saliva pools in the back of his throat, and the urge to sink his teeth into the flesh and bone produced an ache incomparable to the one he felt when he had been eagerly awaiting for the pumpkin dorayaki until earlier today. It wouldn’t be difficult to. He’s so close his lips are basically already touching Takiishi’s skin…
Narrowly winning against his primitive desires, Endo picks up another perfume. The base of the next selected bottle consists of sharp corners that align to form a circle-like polygon that rounds as it nears the top and converges. The back label lists it as a blend of brown sugar, juniper berries, neroli, and campfire.
With a mind still fogged over by the delicious desserts hibernating in Takiishi’s arm, Endo mindlessly tilts the base of Takiishi’s head, exposing more surface area of his neck. The perfume flares the moment it makes contact with Takiishi’s pulse point. It smelled so sweet, earthy, and warm. A slight tingling spiciness tickles the tip of Endo’s tongue as he shortens the distance between him and Takiishi’s cardioid artery.
I could live here forever…
Nuzzling into the column of Takiishi’s neck for the rest of his life didn’t seem like a bad way to live. It’d be fulfilling. Contenting. Every waking moment would be spent in bliss.
Endo is evicted and his new ‘homeless’ status permanently alters the course of his life.
Takiishi’s hand has an iron grip on his hair as it yanks him out of his home.
“Do you remember what you’re doing? You haven’t looked to see what I’d thought since the last bottle,” Takiishi’s voice pinches towards the end. His cheeks are tinted pink.
He doesn’t look mad. An angered Takiishi would have much colder eyes. He wouldn’t even scold Endo, and just skip straight to beating him to a pulp.
“Huh..?” Endo mumbles, dazed.
The hand at the back of his head tightens its grip. Rosy cheeks are shaded into a deeper red. His scalp tingles as black strands of hair shift in their follicle — some strands might be falling out at this point.
“Oh! Umm… This one smells great! What’d you think of it?” Endo hurriedly recomposes himself and blurts, flustered. How on earth did I get that distracted?!
Takiishi looks conflicted as he watches Endo flounder with his hands animatedly and his pupils dart every which way.
Takiishi drops his hand from its place in Endo’s curls. “Forget it. Put it back,” Takiishi turns his back to Endo and starts decisively for the checkout.
“Ah! Wait!” Endo fumbles with the perfume sample, putting the stopper back before returning it to its rightful shelf.
-
Exiting the store, Endo holds the door for Takiishi as they leave.
Objectively, it was a less than productive shopping trip. Subjectively, Endo had never spent 30 minutes more productively. The only downside was that Takiishi didn’t end up getting of the perfumes that Endo tested on him. It’s fine though, there’s always a next time. Endo will reign himself in better.
Their shampoo and Endo’s perfume that Takiishi (!!!) picked out are both in a bag hanging off Endo’s arm.
The dorayaki is clutched in both his hands.
Takiishi takes out the red bean pastry now that they’ve left the store, sliding it up the parchment paper and taking a bite out of the part peaking out. It’s gone mostly cold by now. Which doesn’t make it awful, but Takiishi prefers his dorayaki hot.
Takiishi, displeased, turns to Endo.
“It’s not warm anymore by now, huh. We did spend quite a while in there,” Endo observes as Takiishi looks at him. He turns to smile at Takiishi, “We can just pop that into the oven to heat up when we get home.”
Takiishi’s face doesn’t shift at all in response, as if he completely dismissed the idea as useless and idiotic. He tears a piece of the pancake while still facing that smiling face, and holds it up to Endo’s mouth.
Sneaking a glance over at Takiishi, Endo still sees an emotionless expression. He then eyes the confectionery, perplexed, before returning his attention to Takiishi’s face and tentatively parting his lips to wrap around it.
As Endo takes the flat pastry through his teeth and chews, he watches Takiishi’s facial muscles twitch and move into the shape of a pleased smile. It’s beautiful. Breathtaking. Stunningly alluring. Glorious.
Takiishi’s smile diminishes as Endo swallows, and he rips off another piece from the dorayaki, pressing it firmly against Endo’s lips. Endo opens his mouth again and accepts the dessert. That angelic smile returns full force.
The cycle repeats, again and again and again. And every time, Takiishi’s face would morph into yet another dazzling smile. Sure, Endo kind of feels like a duck at the park being fed breadcrumbs, but he’s done way more ridiculous things to make Takiishi happy before. Besides, he’s a duck that’s been graced with food handfed to him by a god. What’s there to complain about? How many ducks could say they were as lucky as him?
The pieces get progressively stranger shapes and sizes as Takiishi splits them off. Sometimes they’d be as small and long as a nail, and other times they’d be as big and circular as an entire cookie. Somehow, the strange shapes enhance the taste, a Takiishi-exclusive special touch that can make anything delicious.
When the last of the dorayaki has entered Endo's stomach, Takiishi’s face falls at the same time as his eyes do, down to the empty parchment.
His hands shoot out from in front of him straight to the paper bag and to the remaining dorayaki inside. Takiishi unveils the pumpkin-filled dorayaki and continues feeding the tall, humanoid duck beside him.
“Mmm!” Endo hums around the starchy bread, “ig fealgy.. goow!”
Though incomprehensible, one could barely make out his cheery tone of praise.
Takiishi clamps his lips shut between two fingers, “Shut up. Don’t talk while eating,” he demands.
Followed by an insult and frown, “Gross.”
Endo grinned at him and kept chewing.
-
That perfume must have been magic. It must have been a divine relic capable of producing miracles.
Since that day, every once in a while, Takiishi would pull Endo in by the lapels of his shirt, and bury in his nose. Obviously, Endo isn’t an idiot and has connected the dots between his newly acquired perfume and Takiishi’s behavior. So in an effort to milk this new opportunity that presented itself to him, Endo wears that scent like it’s second skin.
The timing between each instance is always unexpected, so Endo feels like he’s perpetually living on edge. It’s like agony. Waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting every hour of the day. Each interval is never longer than three days, but never twice in the same day either. It’s made him become hyper aware of Takiishi and every minute little twitch of his muscles and each raise and fall of his hands. When will the next time be? I want to be that close again…
More rarely than that, though, is when Takiishi would pick out a coat that Endo has worn the day prior. He would get covered in the scent that — clearly — both of them have come to associate with Endo.
It might be presumptuous of Endo, but he perceives them to be closer now. Especially on days where they smell the same, a connection of scent tying the two. It feels like they became a pair.
-
Luckily, the convenience store was close by. A sudden downpour fell while they were taking a stroll around this newly developed part of the next town over. They had to sprint, but ultimately, they’re mostly dry. So it’s not a big deal.
“Let’s get towels too while we’re here. You don’t like colds, so let’s try to avoid catching one,” Endo suggests as he walks through the aisles.
The cheap plastic umbrellas were by the store-front, so Endo’s already holding one in his hand while they browse the store’s selection of snacks.
They’ve only been here for 5 minutes and the basket's half filled with various chips and candies. Wasabi and beef flavored, chocolate covered, and pizza flavored
potato chips, dried seaweed, imo kenpi, pineapple hard candies, assorted fruit fizzy candy, strawberry pocky, and a strange grape gummy that lets you pick each individual grape off of a branch that’s also edible.
Looking at this shopping basket, a customer passing by would probably assume that this was a deliberate trip to buy snacks and not an unplanned spree.
“I haven’t finished getting my snacks yet,” Takiishi replies, pointedly suggesting that Endo better not interfere with his shopping to go get towels. Who’s gonna hold all his snacks if Endo isn’t here?
Takiishi scans the shelves of boxes containing sweet snacks from top to bottom, pausing occasionally when something catches his eye.
A peach flavored ‘flat donut tart cookie’ is dropped into the basket. Endo catches it mid-air before it crushes the chocolate covered chips, and gently places it beside the hard candies.
Matcha infused wafers are thrown at Endo from 5 feet away. It lands perfectly in his hand, and is promptly added to the growing mountain of health hazards.
When Takiishi reaches the end of all the snack aisles, the basket is overflowing precariously. Endo has to walk slower and more carefully, so that nothing topples over.
“We can go get the towels now,” Takiishi says, turning around.
“It’s fine, forget it,” Endo waves, “There’s not a single droplet of water on us anymore, Takiishi.”
Endo smiles as he says, “I’ll make us some lemon-honey water when we get home.”
“Mm,” Takiishi hums, “Let's go checkout then.”
The cashier at the checkout counter looked so worn out that he couldn’t even muster up a half-hearted customer service expression. He has eyebags that look heavier than the shopping basket filled with Takiishi’s junk food. Most likely a college student who pulled an all-nighter the day before. At a passing glance, one could mistake him for a zombie.
They quickly pay for their stuff and leave through the automated front doors. Endo opens up the umbrella and holds it between them. He shifts closer to Takiishi to get more coverage from the rain. No, that’s not true. Endo doesn’t mind getting his arm wet at all. He just wanted to walk home closer to Takiishi.
There’s barely a centimeter wide gap between their shoulders.
“We should hurry home. It’ll be difficult if it gets dark while raining,” Endo says as he adjusts the umbrella to better cover Takiishi.
“I’ll draw us a hot bath when we get back,” Endo begins planning, “I bought some hot chocolate from the supermarket the other day! I’ll make a pot after we finish up with our bath and honey-lemon water. Oh, right! D’you want to use a bath bomb today? There’s still a couple of ‘em left in the cabinet and I wanna restock it when they’re all cleared out— “
“Endo Yamato”
“Yes? What is it?” Endo enthusiastically responds.
When he turns his head, the only thing he can see is Takiishi. Their faces are even nearer than their shoulders. Endo could account in perfect detail how Takiishi’s irises widened, overtaking planes of gold until only a ring remained.
The intensity in which those eyes look at him make a rush of pure energy zap up his spine. Gooseflesh raise from Endo’s skin. His back shivers and his scalp prickles.
It feels so good that the self-preservation part of him wants to run away from the addiction that will most definitely arise. If he didn’t break contact now he might drown in it.
It felt like the sun pinpointed its entire gravitational force onto him and is attempting to drag Endo towards a fiery death. Endo would gratefully accept it if this was how his god deemed he should die.
Alas, his despicable human nature forces him to prioritize survival. Fight or flight kicks in.
Without a doubt, fighting is not an option. This isn’t a force that mere humans could win against. It’s be like trying to combat a tsunami, you’d only get pulled out to sea as you helplessly thrash about.
Cornered with only one way to defend, Endo quickly turns his neck and averts his eyes to the ground. Indirect contact is the best he can do to protect himself.
“We should hurry home…” Endo randomly says, feeling like he had to say something to fill the air with anything other than tension.
Suddenly, there’s fingers in his hair. They pull, and something soft sweeps over his lips.
Endo drops the umbrella and bags of snacks. The plastics make rustling and crinkling sounds as they drop to the ground. The umbrella thumps harshly on the concrete.
Instinctively, Endo lifts his hands to cover Takiishi’s hair. Takiishi styled his hair this morning, it’d be upsetting if it got drenched by the rain.
Realization strikes. Takiishi just kissed me— Takiishi just kissed me?!
As if he heard Endo’s thoughts and decided to answer his question, Takiishi places his hand on Endo’s elbow and propels himself forward. His eyes glazed over with uncertainty, and his swift and awkward movements seemed to sprout from them.
Everything aside from the rain pelting down feels like a figment of Endo’s deluded imagination. Their lips brush so softly, and it technically is a kiss, but if their faces weren’t so close, Endo wouldn’t even know they were kissing.
Takiishi kisses like it’s the most foreign thing to him. The way his lips barely graze over Endo’s is nothing like how he fights. It’s shy. It’s clumsy. Timid. Inexperienced. There’s no assuredness to the nudge of lips against lips. None of this comes as second nature to Takiishi. The act of kissing isn’t one that’s ingrained into his behavior.
It’s a new side to Takiishi that Endo has never seen.
A Takiishi who’s every move isn’t graceful. A Takiishi who’s uncoordinated and klutzy. A Takiishi who, by the blooming blush on his cheek, is embarrassed and self conscious. A Takiishi who is— cute.
Those amateurish lips continue to peck and press against Endo’s unmoving ones while his brain tries to contain the rapid input of information from his senses to preserve this moment with one hundred percent accuracy.
Just as suddenly as those lips come, they disappear.
Oh shit! I froze up like a dumbass and now he thinks I don’t wanna kiss! I didn’t do anything and now he’ll believe that kissing sucks and won’t ever do it again!!
“Wait!” Endo hurriedly grabs hold of Takiishi’s arms, interrupting his retreat.
Endo surges forwards and captures Takiishi’s lips. He initiates the kiss passionately this time instead of freezing up, sucking and nibbling at Takiishi’s upper lip, swiping and nudging at the edges of his mouth.
Takiishi follows along as Endo leads, though he’s often a beat behind or too quick.
Their lips intertwined in a graceless but fervorous rhythm. It’s comforting and exciting and nerve-wracking and dizzying and too much and too little all at the same time. It’s overwhelming, but Endo knows that the moment even a small gap separates them, he would feel ravenous regret and dissatisfaction claw at him at this — the happiest and most satisfied moment he will ever feel — coming to an end.
The end is inevitable however. They will have to part, and Endo will have to learn to live with the knowledge of what kissing Takiishi feels like. Endo will get used to not having Takiishi’s lips on his.
Takiishi disconnects them, the flush on his face and glassiness over his eyes receed. He picks up the umbrella from where it’s fallen, unfurls the metal skeleton, and holds out the handle to Endo, wordlessly ordering him to take it and cover them from the rain.
Oh right. It was raining.
Endo picks up the bags of snacks off the ground before taking the umbrella from Takiishi.
Needing to know if he should continue holding the candle of hope in heart or extinguish it completely, Endo wants to ask if this will ever happen again.
The words bubble up in his throat, ‘Did you like it?’ But just as his mouth fills with them, the bubbles all pop and vanish.
He doesn’t want to ask. He doesn’t want to kill this hope with own two hands.
So he doesn’t acknowledge it. Simply holds up the umbrella and follows Takiishi home, staring straight ahead, but not confronting anything. He pretends like he never learned what Takiishi tastes like, how soft he could be.
Soft splashes echo out from under their shoes, the rain keeps battering down from above. Pitter patter rings in the air as drops of water rain down onto the umbrella over their heads.
The splashes cease their tempo. Takiishi has stopped walking. Endo matches his pace.
Takiishi turns his shoulders and neck to face Endo. He stares right into him, the gold of his eyes burn molten and they glare enough to cleave his face in half, “Endo Yamato. After the hot chocolate, I want to continue.”
There’s no mistaking what Takiishi wants to ‘continue’ even if he doesn’t explicitly specify. There’s also no mistaking the frustration laced into his tone. Regardless of how it's portrayed though, the demand fuels Endo’s small fire of hope into a stable flame. He stands straighter.
“Whatever you want, your wish is my command!” Endo responds brightly.
-
The humidity from the rain makes a miasma of Endo’s perfume. It’s intoxicating. It’s hundreds of times more overwhelming than his day-old coats and jackets that linger with the remnants of his body having lived in the lining and sleeves. A forest of bergamots can easily be visualized in front of Takiishi’s eyes. A motorcycle ride through empty late-night streets, with Takiishi’s arms wrapped around Endo’s waist. Given how close they are on the small vehicle, the scent of leather emits from Endo’s jacket.
Takiishi has only seen kissing in movies that Endo puts on the TV for them once a week. The characters always dart forward like it’s a repressed desire over-spilling. Takiishi has never felt this desire, so he has never experienced the ‘magic’ of it.
Being in the rain right now though, and most importantly, surrounded by the scent of ‘Endo Yamato’ makes this desire that might be similar to wanting to ‘kiss’ bead up in small quantities at the back of his throat.
Surprisingly, kissing Endo Yamato is just like how those movies describe it to be. Kissing Endo Yamato is like lighting fireworks.
Did Endo Yamato not feel the same sensation of lighting up from the inside out? Why hasn’t he asked Takiishi if it felt good yet? Why hasn’t he declared that they could do it as many times as Takiishi wants yet?
It’s been 2 minutes since they’ve stopped kissing and started walking!
Infuriated, Takiishi speaks up, “Endo Yamato. After the hot chocolate, I want to continue.”
“Whatever you want, your wish is my command!” Endo Yamato enthusiastically answered, his entire demeanor turning so sunny it drowns out the rain.
Who’s really the one that doesn’t want to wait?
Takiishi glowers with more hatred in his eyes, puffing out his cheek. If you were so eager, why didn’t you say anything?!