Work Text:
Literally just as Junhui opened his eyes, he heard a notification ring from his phone. It was strange, as though the person texting him knew his exact wake-up time. To be fair, he did have quite an orderly habit of waking up at the same exact time every morning, no matter what their schedule was.
He prompted himself up on one elbow and reached for his phone with his free hand. Glancing sleepily at the notification screen, he wasn't surprised to see a new text message from "Anonymous."
To be completely truthful, Junhui had been receiving text messages from this "Anonymous" person for a while since a couple of months ago. While they didn't come in streams and were normally extremely short, they sounded strangely affectionate towards Junhui. Maybe it was a fan who managed to get a hold of his private number somehow, in which case he should probably report them to his manager, but at the same time, something about the texts seemed oddly familiar to him and gave him a warm feeling.
If it was something that made him feel good about himself, why stop it?
Morning. Eat your breakfast properly, don't skip meals.
This seemed to be the standard morning message he always got from his slightly bossy secret admirer. Sometimes the messages felt so standard that Junhui wondered if it was an actual person typing, or if it was one of those "bot" thingies he's heard Jisoo talk about.
In order to test it out, Junhui had considered replying at one point, but then thought better of it. If it really was a fan who's been sending him private messages, then it'd be too risky.
If there was a standard morning message, there was naturally a standard before bed message, and it normally went like this-
Heading to bed, good night. Don't sleep too late.
Sometimes, just sometimes, it would be accompanied by one more short message that somehow made Junhui's heart skip a beat whenever he read it. Then afterwards he'd repeat it over and over again in his head, causing his heart to beat faster every time until he eventually had to put down his phone and calm himself down before a seizure comes along.
I love you.
He thought he'd be used to it by now, fans said it to him all the time on social media, and he could respond easily with his own "I love you~" or something cheesier, but for some reason he still catches himself feeling flustered by this "Anonymous" person in particular.
I miss you.
Maybe it was just the way he typed that reminded Junhui of a particular someone... but that was impossible. After all, that person was no longer with them. Well, that sounded a little too morbid, but there was no way to contact that person, no matter how much Junhui wished he could. There was no reason for him to leave so soon, but then again, he was always one to be stubborn about seeing his plans through once he's decided on something. That was something Junhui had deeply admired about that person, but that doesn't mean he didn't try to interfere somehow.
The group even had a team meeting about the matter, even though it wasn't really needed. Given how strong-willed that person was, even if all the other twelve said no, he'd probably do it anyway and somehow make the other twelve compliant about his decision.
They all respected his choice, but the spot he left was still very much prominent.
In fact, the interviewers also made a point of calling the issue up, "So how are activities as a group of twelve?"
Bitch, we're still thirteen even if he can't be physically present. Junhui almost replied every time he heard the close to obnoxious question, unfortunately Seokmin and Hansol made sure to keep him in check so he never got a chance.
Work is important, but don't forget to take care of yourself.
Junhui tapped at the keys, "Thanks!" but, alas, he could never get himself to press "send."
Today was an important day, as pretty much all of their work days were, of course, but today was especially important. It was their first comeback after quite a while, but what was even more special about it was that they were introducing a song that was produced by someone other than "him." It took a long while, but the members had managed to create a fully group-produced song, at the same time wondering how "he" was able to produce songs so quickly in comparison. Junhui didn't think it was even possible for his respect for him to expand further than what he already had.
He hadn't felt this nervous in a while. Normally the nervousness he felt was out of excitement, and even joy, knowing that their fans were out there, ready to support them, and he knew they would be able to most importantly, have fun on the stage. However, the nervousness he felt now was entangled with anxiety, almost like the first time they were asked to perform as an ability test.
He tried to do some breathing exercises, but it only made him choke. He didn't know that even he was capable of feeling this way.
Relax, take a deep breath, you'll be fine!
The timing of these texts were almost too good to be true, but Junhui felt grateful for it, especially at this very moment.
"...All right, just have fun." Junhui said to himself under his breath as Seungcheol called for a group gathering just before they had to go on stage. "It'll be fine." Junhui said to himself again before joining the others in a circle.
But after everything was done and over with, while Junhui had fun performing on stage with the rest, and the fans seemed to have enjoyed themselves, he couldn't help thinking to himself secretly while removing his makeup in the washroom, "He" would have done better.
Well, there was no use comparing themselves to someone who was already gone. Then again, if he ever used that word, everything would fall apart.
While walking down the hallway one day, Junhui felt a strange urge to visit Seungcheol's room. It felt like such a long time since he last popped in, especially since promotions became busier. After all, they couldn't just have the entire group waiting around just because of the loss of one member.
He raised his hand to knock, but realized the door was already halfway open. Still wondering if he should just knock anyway, Junhui peeked around the door cautiously. Seungcheol, Jeonghan, and Mingyu were all lounging around on their beds for a rare nap time, but Junhui couldn't help moving his gaze towards the one empty bed in the room.
"His" bed.
It seemed like so long since someone's last used it, there was almost a coldness to it. Feeling strangely drawn towards the empty bed, Junhui took quiet and careful steps towards the corner, placing an almost trembling hand against the sheets. He felt his shoulders relax when he felt the coolness of the mattress spread through his fingers tips. He didn't know what he was expecting, it's been over a year since "he" last lied there after all.
Nonetheless, Junhui found himself lying down on the bed, on top of the blankets, his head laid gently on the pillow. It was as though he just wanted to find some sort of assurance that there was once warmth there.
"His" warmth.
He didn't even notice when he drifted off to sleep, until he found himself waking up almost 5 hours later. The lights were turned off in the hallway, and the room was now empty. He found himself lying underneath the blankets as opposed to his original position above them and thought that it must have been the work of one of the members.
He was about to get up when he heard voices talking in hushed tones outside the room.
"Isn't it pitiful to leave him like that?"
"If only 'he' were here..."
"Don't worry, it'll be over soon."
Too tired to think much of the conversation, Junhui chose to flop back down on the bed instead. He had been clutching his phone in his hand for the entire time, and he finally noticed the little notification note on his screen when it lit up.
It's getting late, you better be sleeping by now.
Junhui didn't know why, but he found the almost threatening tone of the text oddly endearing instead of creepy like most people would probably think, especially when it was from an anonymous sender. He scrolled down the message log to see a small note at the bottom.
By the way, I love you.
Junhui didn't really understand why, but during some sort of midnight outing after practice, Jisoo decided to tell the younger member a story he read on the internet that day while they waited for their food to cool down slightly.
According to Jisoo, there was a couple who had to move apart from each other due to their jobs, and of course, long-distance relationships were always hard. The girl was very busy, but always received timely texts from her boyfriend, and they made her smile every time she read them, even though she didn't have time to reply to every single one of his texts.
"Then what happened?" Junhui asked, feeling that he might as well listen even though he wasn't quite sure where Jisoo was going with the story. Maybe he was reading too deep into it, Jisoo could just be telling it for the sake of sharing, after all.
"After almost an entire year, the girl decided to surprise the guy by visiting his place one day," Jisoo continued, his hands folded in front of him in a wistful manner, "Except when she knocked on his door, he didn't answer. Thinking that he was probably still at work, she waited on the porch. After a while, her boyfriend's neighbor noticed her and asked if she was lost. After all, the tenant of that apartment passed away months ago."
Junhui stared steadily at Jisoo, waiting to see if there was more to the story. But all Jisoo did was turn back to his food, rubbing his hands together in anticipation to dig in. "Wait, that's it?" Junhui blinked, scowling slightly, he should really have expected it, "So was that supposed to be a ghost story? I hate to tell you this, but Halloween is over, hyung."
"Oh, no, remember that 'bot' thing I told you about? The guy designed one and had it send texts to his girlfriend after he died." Jisoo explained, looking strangely happy about the story, "Isn't that cool?"
"No, just unrealistic and unromantic." Jeonghan took a jab from the side.
"Hey, it's romantic! The last thing the guy personally texted the girl was 'I love you'. Also, the bot he designed would send out 'I love you' texts for at least once everyday-"
"Enough about the bot, you can't make technology romantic no matter how hard you try." Seungkwan rolled his eyes, seemingly already done with the entire story from the very beginning.
"Junhui, you okay? Your noodles are getting soggy." Jeonghan prompted, nudging Junhui in the shoulder.
Startled, the younger male quickly picked up his chopsticks, "Oh, uh, right." After scooping up some between his chopsticks, Junhui began to stare blankly at his food again.
"Jun-hyung, you okay? You've been blanking out a lot lately." Seungkwan said after swallowing a mouthful, "...Jun-hyung!" He called again when that didn't seem to snap Junhui out of his trance.
"Huh? Y-yeah, I'm fine."
From the corner of his eye as he slurped up his meal, Junhui noticed a notification showing up on his screen. Right on time.
I'll be heading off to bed now. Good night.
Junhui was almost scared to see the next message, but at the same time, not seeing it would make him even more uneasy. So he had to scroll down-
P.S. I love you.
It was weird. Junhui had been lying in his bed for the past 3 minutes just listening to his alarm loop itself. Something wasn't right. Normally he would wake up before his alarm, and normally he'd hear the tiny ring of a message notification, but neither happened today. Something just didn't seem right. Anonymous had never missed a single day for over 20 months, it was hard to believe that they'd flub up now.
Well, they're only human... probably. Junhui thought to himself, finally turning off his alarm when Wonwoo threw a pillow at him.
However, it still worried him immensely. What if something had happened to Anonymous?
Soonyoung seemed abnormally hyper this morning, and that was saying something. The moment he saw Junhui coming downstairs, he literally bounced over to him with excitement practically sparking out of his eyes, "Morning! Aren't you excited?!"
"Uh, I guess? We have a variety show, right?" Junhui responded, panicking slightly. He didn't remember having something scheduled for today.
"No, we're going to the train station!" Soonyoung cheered, taking Junhui by the hand and jumping up and down as his usual overly energized self. Still in a daze, Junhui automatically jumped up and down along with his unit leader, not entirely sure what to make of the situation. Maybe he should ask why first, but he didn't want to seem like "that one member" who never knows what's going on for their schedule.
"Oh, okay, cool." Junhui replied weakly, feeling his legs growing tired from all the jumping, but Soonyoung refused to stop. That was, until Seungcheol eventually ushered everyone into the van, and Junhui just had barely enough time to grab his phone before getting practically thrown into the backseat.
While his group mates were noisy as per usual, Junhui spent the entire ride glancing at his phone even though no notification rings went off. When they did, they were from his fellow teammates who found it amusing to text each other despite being seated next to one another, just the usual bantering.
Soonyoung and Seungcheol were especially excited about meeting this person whom they were apparently picking up at the station, and Junhui wondered if it was someone they've worked with as trainees, like an old instructor, or even a fellow ex-trainee. But no matter how hard he tried to get himself hyped up by anticipating the identity of this mystery person, he couldn't help getting worried about what might have happened to Anonymous.
Granted, it was still pretty early in the day, but he hadn't received a single text from Anonymous at all, and that definitely wasn't normal. It felt like a sudden disruption of his daily routine, and Junhui honestly didn't know what to do aside from wild guessing. He honestly didn't think they had meant that much to him, especially since they were from an anonymous source, and he felt bad for taking them for granted.
"I can't believe it's finally today! I've been counting down to this day since forever!" Soonyoung was practically jumping out of his seat as the station came to view.
"I'm sure he's been doing the same." Seungcheol replied, grinning fondly as the rest of the group chattered. But Junhui just couldn't share their enthusiasm. Why was he the only one who didn't know the identity of this person anyway? Maybe he missed something during one of their meetings... But no one bothered to remind him either, all they did was chatter away over each other.
"Psst, Minghao, I know this is probably really annoying since everyone's so excited and all, but... who exactly are we picking up?" Junhui whispered pleadingly to the only person he could count on to keep it down at the moment.
"You really don't know?" Minghao asked, raising an eyebrow at Junhui in almost a disappointed way. Junhui only shook his head in response. But instead of answering him, Minghao indicated towards the station, "Just wait and see."
Puzzled, Junhui simply followed after the group as they filed out of the car, walking inside the already crowded station with Seungcheol at the front, reading off notes from his notebook which contained where they were supposed to meet up with the mystery person.
At first, Junhui looked around the station along with the others, but then realized that he wouldn't recognize this person anyway since he didn't have a target in mind in the first place, so he ended up just wandering around behind Chan and Minghao. But they would stop after every three steps to take a good look at the faces around them, while Junhui would look down at his phone, hoping that Anonymous had finally sent him a text.
"THERE HE IS!" All three whipped their heads around at the high-pitched yell they recognized to be from Soonyoung, and almost immediately, Chan and Minghao started racing towards the source of their leader's voice and practically tackled the person next to him to the floor.
Junhui moved much slower towards them, having trouble getting past the crowd now that he was just one fish fighting against the current. When he finally got there, the group itself had huddled into a crowd and Junhui still couldn't see who they were all trying to get a piece of.
"It's been so long!"
"Heyyy, it looks like you've grown!"
"I will kill you."
That voice, Junhui would recognize it anywhere, but he didn't believe it. Meanwhile, Mingyu seemed to realize that he was blocking Junhui's view and quickly moved aside, urging the others to do so as well. Then "he" was finally in full view, and Junhui could only stare dumbly. He had missed him for so long, tried to ignore the empty presence he left, but now that he was actually there, he wasn't quite sure what to do.
"Hey." Junhui started robotically.
"Hey." Jihoon replied, tipping his cap slightly higher so that he could see Junhui's face better without tilting his neck back completely.
Junhui wondered for a moment if the cap was meant to hide his crew cut, but then again, Jihoon didn't seem like the type to do that. He chewed on his tongue for a while as Jihoon continued to look at him with a steady gaze, like he was expecting him to say something.
"For God's sake, what is wrong with you two?! Aren't you happy to see your boyfriend after TWO WHOLE YEARS?!" Seungkwan suddenly bellowed, shoving Junhui towards Jihoon.
"Yeah, Jun, he's finally back from military service, doesn't he deserve at least a hug?" Seungcheol surprisingly joined in on the egging, "I still can't believe he's the first of us though."
"Don't you feel your pride as the leader just crumble?" Jeonghan joked, earning a playful shove from the rapper.
"Well, of course I'm happy, but I'm not surprised he isn't." Jihoon suddenly spoke, tugging his cap lower again, "We left on pretty bad terms."
"Wait, what?" Junhui scowled, he had already forgotten it, but now that it's been mentioned again, he had a vague remembrance of him calling Jihoon a cold-hearted goblin or something along those lines, "...Oh, I guess we did... But of course I'm happy to see you, Jihoonie~" He grinned widely, ignoring Jihoon's eye-roll as he hugged the latter as tight as he could. It felt nice, having him in his arms again, he had almost forgotten how perfectly he fitted in his embrace.
Jihoon had frozen up for a brief second before muttering, "Damn it," and returning the hug, causing "Awww"s and "Ooohh"s to echo out through the group.
"I was planning on ignoring you for ignoring my texts." Jihoon grumbled, his arms tightening around Junhui.
"Texts? You never sent me any texts." Junhui blinked, pulling away slightly, confused by the statement. He had thought they cut off all contact during military service, and that was why he had never received any news from Jihoon, but apparently not.
"I sent you texts everyday, what are you talking about- oh." Jihoon's arms loosened as he flashed a glare towards Soonyoung and Seungcheol, "Don't tell me they never told you my new phone number."
"I thought you were supposed to tell him!" Seungcheol stared at Soonyoung with bewilderment.
"Oops, it slipped my mind~"
"Hey, it's not funny, you're really telling me that you let Junhui go through an entire two years not knowing he could contact Jihoon?"
"Ohhh, so you're Anonymous!" Junhui suddenly exclaimed, pulling out his phone and showing Jihoon the texts, "That makes so much sense now! The way you guys type, the things you say, wow, if I had known I would have replied."
Jihoon rolled his eyes, not believing how ridiculous the situation was, and yet it was almost expected.
"Aw, but you sure tell me you love me a lot in texts, why can't you do that face-to-face, too?" Junhui grinned mischievously, pretending to be counting how many times Jihoon's sent him an "I love you" text over the past 24 months.
"Since you're such an insecure wreck I figured I had to constantly remind you when I'm away." Jihoon replied, not seemingly bothered by the teasing. "But you know what, since it has been two years, I might as well."
"Come on, don't say it like that~"
Ignoring Junhui's grin, Jihoon pulled the taller boy down by his shirt, successfully delivering a kiss that's been delayed for far too long. Besides, that always made Junhui shut up enough for him to deliver the final blow, "I love you."
Before Junhui could give a response, Jihoon pressed their lips together again. He wasn't going to admit it, but of course one kiss wasn't enough to make up for the 24 months they've been separated from each other.
As they exited the station, Jihoon kept a tight hold on Junhui's hand while the latter chattered away about all the things they've been up to since Jihoon's absence, and the newly restored member wasn't even going to complain about how noisy they were being in the car on the way home.
"But how come nobody reminded me about Jihoon's return date?" Junhui suddenly piped up as they reached the dorms.
Instead of answering, all the members turned their heads towards Jihoon, who gave a small smile before motioning for Junhui to check his phone. Looking down, Junhui could only break into a laugh as the others reached over to pat him on the back or ruffle his hair.
Happy birthday.