Archive of Our Own

Avery sat on the edge of his minecraft bed, staring at the floor. His hands are in his lap. Each blink is slow. Every breath is heavy. He can’t cry anymore. His tears have already dried up months ago. He can’t remember the last time he shed a tear, or laughed. All he knows is that it’s been so long. He rarely eats, rarely drinks, rarely sleeps. He’s had to deal with phantoms very often. And “deal with phantoms,” really just means continue to sit inside his house until the sun comes up and the phantoms burn to death. Most of his time is spent sitting here, in this exact spot, in this exact position, his hands in his lap, staring at the floor. It takes so much effort to even move.

Avery looks up, staring off into the distance. After a minute, he stands up, slowly. He walks over to the kitchen and picks up a knife, staring at it. His movements are slow and heavy, as if he’s been weighed down. He stares down at the knife in his hand for a few long minutes.

Avery walks outside, holding the knife. He stares up at the sky watching the clouds. He lifts the knife to his wrist, and starts cutting. Light cuts at first, slowly going deeper, and deeper. Maybe the pain will make him feel something. Anything. Eventually the cuts start going down to the bone. After a few minutes, blood has pooled down on the floor below. But it’s not enough. It’s not enough. This won’t bring him back. He brings the knife up to his torso, holding it pointed at his chest for a few seconds, before he pulls it back, and shoves it in deep. Pain shoots through his body, but he doesn’t seem to care. He pulls the knife down, cutting deeper and making the cut longer. The blood stains his shirt.

He feels weak…

The knife falls out of Avery’s hand as Avery falls backward onto the ground. Blood immediately starts pooling around him. He can’t get up. He doesn’t want to. He can only feel pain. He stares up at the pretty light blue sky, soft clouds scattered across it. Beautiful…

He feels weaker with every passing second. Avery closes his eyes.



---



Avery begins to wonder if D3rlord3 is really out there. He promised he’d come back. He promised he find his way back. He promised he’d get rid of The King in Yellow and come back. He promised.

But it’s been months since New Years Eve. He’s not here.

What if he comes back?

Avery opens his eyes.

What if he comes back and finds my body?

...

He said he would come back. If he was right… oh… D3rlord3…

Avery feels a pang in his chest. He can tell it doesn’t have anything to do with the overwhelming pain in his body. The first sliver of emotion since… he doesn’t know how long. He’s surprised when he feels his cheek get wet. Tear… he’s… crying…

Avery lets his tears fall. He starts to audibly sob, despite the extra pain the movement brings him. He feels almost too weak from the loss of blood to make a sound, but somehow… he does.

“D3rlord3… I… I’m sorry…” He chokes out, blood starting to rise up his throat and out of his mouth. “I’m so… sor… sorry…” He almost chokes on the blood in his mouth, letting his head fall to the right to allow the blood to more easily slide out of his mouth.

His vision is tunneling… the colors are fading…

Avery’s sobs turn into small, breathless whimpers. He’s gasping, trying to catch his breath.

His vision starts to blur, darkness starting to take over.

Avery can’t sob anymore. His breathing is slow and shallow. Only silent tears roll down his cheeks.

Everything slowly goes dark. Avery takes his last breath.



---



D3rlord3 breaks the last piece of cobblestone, finally reaching dirt. He breathes a sigh of relief, starting to punch at the dirt. He’s finally close to the surface. His knuckles are bleeding from punching stone for so long. He’s spent weeks trying to get back up to the surface after getting rid of The King in Yellow, traveling up through caves, barely surviving off of glowberries and rotten flesh. He digs up through the dirt, choking out a half sob once he sees daylight after breaking the last dirt block. He can finally… finally… prove to Avery that he wouldn’t fall back on his promise. Finally be with the person he’s grown to care about through the infinite knowledge. Except this time, no King in Yellow, no infinite knowledge, no headaches, just him and the person who he will hopefully grow to be close with. Be friends with.

D3rlord3 climbs to the surface, and he’s never been so happy to just see grass, trees, the sun, the clouds, never been so happy to breathe in the fresh air and be where there isn’t always the threat of zombies or skeletons spawning. He stands there for a moment, closing his eyes basking in the relief, and the hope that he will find Avery.

He opens his eyes and starts to walk. He grabs the book from his inventory that he wrote down the coordinates to Avery’s house in back when he still had infinite knowledge. He had written it down before getting rid of the King in Yellow, knowing his infinite knowledge would die along with The King in Yellow.



---



D3rlord3 stops dead in his tracks, his heart skipping a beat. No… no no no…

He breaks out into a run, rushing over to Avery. The almost dry pool of blood around Avery in unmistakable. The deep gash in Avery’s chest is unmistakable. The deep gashes in Avery’s wrists are unmistakable.

“No… no no no no no no- No! Avery! Avery!” D3rlord3 shakes Avery in denial. “Avery!”

…Avery’s body is cold.

D3rlord3 holds Avery’s head, looking into his lifeless eyes. D3rlord3’s hands start to shake. “Avery! Please, you- You can’t be dead! Avery! Avery! Avery!” D3rlord3 voice becomes shaky. Tears start to stream down his face. “Avery… why… why would you… I… I promised you… I would come back…” D3rlord3 gently pulls Avery’s body closer to him, resting Avery’s head on his lap. He pushes strands of Avery’s hair to the side. “Avery... I… I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…” His voice cracks on the words, leaning downward. “I should’ve been here sooner, I…” D3rlord3 chokes out a sob, unable to speak any longer. He opens his mouth to continue, but his voice locks up. He instead holds Avery close, staying by his side.

He doesn’t move. For hours. He doesn’t want to move.

Avery is dead.

He didn’t get to Avery fast enough.

It’s his fault.

“I’m sorry…”