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Namjoon knew a lot about the universe. He spoke at least six languages, had studied countless cultures, and had visited many planets thanks to his station as a ship captain in the Intergalactic Armed Forces.
However the universe, as an entity, as a realm of existence, as a very idea, was unknowable. It was practically the universe’s prerogative. Namjoon knew this, and did his best to take it in stride, though he did his best to try to learn as much as he could anyway.
This unknowable status was why, when Yoongi came into the navigation room and told him this tiny tidbit of Vixx culture that he hadn’t picked up on, Namjoon found himself choking out, “What?”
“The leader of any group of beings that visits the Vixx planet, as they are understood by the Vixx to be the strongest member of any group,” Yoongi said again, slower this time, like he was trying to make sure that Namjoon fully comprehended his words, “has to be mated, or else they will want some of your DNA to breed with to continue their line or to experiment with. Apparently, they’ll do this by any means necessary.”
“So why can’t I just let them have some of my hair and not have to deal with the ‘mate’ thing?” Namjoon asked, cringing at the word. He didn’t like the idea of leaving behind some of his DNA behind for some alien race to experiment with, but when they had missions like this, he’d learned to just take things as they came.
“Because they’ll want to examine your dick for three years,” Yoongi said flatly, “and we just don’t have the kind of time.”
“Oh,” Namjoon said, looking down at his crotch out of reflex. His dick was still there, thank the stars, though there was no reason that it should have been gone.
Seokjin chose that moment to walk in, two steaming cups of tea in his hand. He placed one in front of Namjoon before asking, “Why do you two look so horrified?”
“The captain has to get married or else aliens are going to eat his penis.” The fact that Yoongi could say this with no emotion, just steady matter of factness, reminded Namjoon why he had elected Yoongi to be his first mate in the first place.
“Oh,” Seokjin said, in the same tone of voice that Namjoon had used earlier. But his eyes were twinkling when he said, “that would be a problem, wouldn’t it?” And then he started to laugh, throwing his head back at the ridiculousness of it all.
And when Seokjin laughed, when he was happy, you couldn’t help laughing with him. It was seemingly one of those mystifying laws of the universe, one of the ones Namjoon didn’t know the origin of. So he began to laugh, too, because there were some things that you just couldn’t help but laugh at, and this was one of them.
That night the entire crew gathered around the big table in the galley, someone procuring two bottles of soju seemingly out of nowhere, to decide who would be Namjoon’s mate for the entirety of their time on the Vixx planet.
“I’m out,” Yoongi said immediately, his glass of soju completely untouched. “I was his roommate for years--years--at the Academy. Besides, as first mate, someone will need to be present if shit gets hairy. So nope, not me.”
Jimin laughed, his eyes dancing with amusement at Yoongi’s proclamation. He’d only had a glass of soju, but his cheeks were already flushed. “Well, we know Jeonggukie’s out, since he’s technically still a stowaway and can’t be on any of the paperwork.”
Jeongguk just smiled, pleased with himself, and raised his glass as if his paperless status on the ship wasn’t a pain in the ass for everyone else. Beside him, Taehyung clapped his back hard enough that his entire body went forward and he hit the edge of the table with a oof.
“I know how we should decide,” Hoseok said, snapping his fingers. “We should draw straws. It’s fair and easy. And Yoongi can hold them, since he’s out anyway.”
“Draw straws?” Seokjin said. “Really? Do we even have straws?”
“I think I have some in my bunk,” Taehyung said, and no one questioned this.
“Don’t I get a say in this?” Namjoon finally spoke up, feeling the need to do so.
Six voices responded at once. “No.”
It turned out that Taehyung did have straws, for some reason, all in different colors. Yoongi and Jeongguk went into the corner to cut them, Jeongguk giggling the entire time. When they came back, Yoongi had all of the straws in his left hand. His solemnity was broken by the fact that the corner of his mouth was twitching.
Everyone that was still in the running grabbed at once, keeping the length of theirs hidden until Yoongi said, “Okay, show ‘em.”
Hoseok had the longest straw, which he seemed visibly relieved about. Seokjin had the shortest, and immediately began wailing about it. “You had better treat me well,” he said in the middle of this, while everyone else roared with laughter. He then took a long and showy drink of his soju, sliding his cup to Hoseok so he could be poured another.
Namjoon, feeling the need for more alcohol himself, also finished his glass. “I will,” he said, but so quietly that he was sure no one else heard him in the uproar. Seokjin, sitting directly to his left, seemed to be the only one that did.
Most of the mirth was wiped off Seokjin’s face when he said, “I know you will, captain. I’m not scared of that." He turned to say something to Jeongguk before Namjoon could ask what, exactly, he was scared of.
They spent the rest of the night drinking, which considering they’d be docking in two days was most likely not the wisest decision, but Namjoon knew that having a good time was a good way to keep morale up. And besides, whoever had shared their soju to the group was doing so at a very high personal cost.
In the end, the alcohol was the only way that Namjoon worked up the courage to make his way to Seokjin’s room once everyone had gone back to their own beds. He was standing in Seokjin’s doorway, more like swaying really, trying to find it within himself to knock on the door. Before he could, though, Seokjin’s door slid open.
“Come in,” Seokjin told him, laughing a little. His face was still wet and shiny, as he hadn’t gotten drunk enough to forego washing it the way he did every night. Namjoon could feel fondness settling into his chest.
“I, uh.” Namjoon cleared his throat. “Um, so, there’s-”
“Spit it out, Joonie,” Seokjin said, turning away from the mirror where he was drying his skin with one of the fancy towels he had brought from home. Joonie, he said, and maybe he was more drunk than Namjoon had realized. Around everyone else, Seokjin called him captain, the same as the others. When they were alone in the navigation room, or Seokjin was helping him with the official business that always tripped Namjoon up, he was Namjoon, and they were equals. But Joonie, well, that was something completely different.
Seokjin had called him Joonie only once before, at a bar in one of the port cities where they had stopped at to refuel. They had been drinking then too, just the two of them. Yoongi had stayed on the ship with Jeongguk and Jimin, and Hoseok had been making negotiations with Taehyung elsewhere in the city. So it had been only the two of them, with booze made for physiologies much stronger than theirs.
The bar had glowed blue on the outside, alerting everyone to what it was, and making that entire corner of that particular planet turn blue too. In that blue light Seokjin had breathed, “Joonie,” before he leaned in and kissed him. Namjoon had been too surprised to kiss him back for very long, even though he would have been content to stay there and kiss Seokjin on that dirty street for ages, their entire world washed in neon light. When Seokjin had pulled back he had laughed, and wrapped his arm around Namjoon’s shoulders. Namjoon had laughed too, and pretended like he didn’t wish for more.
In the morning, Seokjin hadn’t brought it up, and so Namjoon had figured that he hadn’t remembered. And that was fine. That was better, probably, anyway, and so Namjoon pretended that this was the first time he had ever heard Seokjin call him Joonie, and decided not to comment on it.
“The Vixx survive in their environment more with their sense of smell than they do with their vision,” Namjoon began, feeling academic and dry but also like this was necessary. Seokjin just smiled politely.
“I know. I do actually read the briefings you give out.”
“Oh,” Namjoon said, feeling even more awkward now. “Sorry, then. But what I was, uh, getting at was. If we’re going to be mated, in their estimation, it might be better if we, um, touched each other more.”
“Touched each other more?” Seokjin asked. He sat on his bunk and patted the empty space beside him. Namjoon sat gratefully, thankful for the excuse to do more than stand and feel huge and gangly and utterly awkward.
“Yeah. So we could smell like each other.”
Seokjin bit his lip around a smile. “I see,” he said. “Then you’ll have to sleep here, with me, every night before we land, won’t you.”
“That...that might be a good idea,” Namjoon said. “And, like I said before, touching.”
“Touching?”
“Yes,” Namjoon said, and almost shocked at his own daring, he reached out and touched Seokjin’s face. “Like this.” Seokjin sucked in a surprised breath, eyes wide, but didn’t say anything else.
His skin was soft under Namjoon’s palm, and warm, freshly washed and moisturized and whatever else Seokjin did to keep his skin so flawless like that. Though Namjoon was sure that most of it was natural, anyway. Namjoon had thought Seokjin was beautiful since the first moment that he had seen him as a new recruit for his ship, green and not as serious as Namjoon would have liked him to be, all those years ago.
“Like this,” Seokjin repeated, and placed his hand gently on Namjoon’s cheek. He let it linger there for just a moment before he slid his hand from Namjoon’s cheek to his neck, from his neck to his shoulder and then all the way until his palm stopped on top of Namjoon’s heart. It was pounding so hard that Namjoon was sure Seokjin could feel it, but he didn’t comment. “Like this?” Seokjin asked again, and this time there was a questioning lilt coloring his words.
“Yes,” Namjoon said, finally finding the strength to remove his hand from Seokjin’s face. “Just like that.”
Namjoon didn’t quite remember falling asleep in Seokjin’s bunk, but he must have because that was where he woke up. Seokjin was laying beside him, mouth wide open, leaning back against the pillows, all of which he had stolen last night.
Checking the digital clock that was projected on every room in the sleeping cabins, Namjoon saw that they had an hour before the first bell rang to wake everyone that slept through the night up for the beginning of the day. As such, Namjoon watched Seokjin sleep for a little bit, feeling only a little bit creepy, before he sat up and worked the kinks out of his neck.
Feeling the movement, Seokjin sat up suddenly, a soldier in every regard. “What-?”
“Nothing’s going on,” Namjoon said. “I should go let Jeongguk sleep and relieve him from navigating duty, though. I’m pretty sure he’s been there all night.”
“This system is unusually clear,” Seokjin said. “We would have felt if anything happened. He’s fine. You should stay in bed for a little longer.”
“Your bunk is too small,” Namjoon said finally. Resisting Seokjin’s offer to curl up beside him for their full extra hour was hard, but he made himself stand up. He wiped a hand over his face in an attempt to clear his head. “We should sleep in my bed tonight. The captain’s quarters are much bigger anyway.”
Seokjin flopped back into his bunk with a groan. “Aye, aye, captain,” he said, but Namjoon could tell from his voice that he was smiling.
The mission was a simple visit, observe, and retrieve operation, the way the rest of their most recent missions had been. They were collecting all of the Obsaeron Orbs on this side of the solar system, and already had six in the cockpit of their ship, emitting a low purple light whenever you went close enough to them. Once they had collected all nine, they were to report back to headquarters, the planet of the Big Bang, and present all the orbs to the five members of the council.
For what reason, Namjoon didn’t know, nor did he question it. He might have been the captain of a ship, but he was a soldier first and foremost, and soldiers did what they were told. Even if Namjoon didn’t necessarily feel completely comfortable with this.
“You and Seokjin will have to handle the diplomacy with this one,” Yoongi said, sitting across from Namjoon in the navigation room. He spent most of his time in the operations room, but since they were going to reach Vixx soon, they needed to talk, and the navigation room was a much better place for that.
Seokjin snorted from the co-pilot chair to Namjoon’s right. “So I guess that means I’ll be doing most of the talking.”
“I’m not that bad!” Namjoon protested. Yoongi, Seokjin, and Jeongguk all gave him disbelieving looks. Which wasn’t fair, Jeongguk wasn’t even allowed to get off the ship most places. “I’m not that bad anymore,” he amended.
“Well, since they’ll be looking for the leader, it will have to be you two. You’ll probably have to sleep on their planet as well...” Yoongi frowned, looking at the intel on his scroll. “We’ll have to stay for at least three rotations around their sun if we want to get the orb. Apparently, they don’t give things away easily, even if they’re required to under the agreement of The Protection of the Big Bang Galaxy Act. If we don’t manage to convince them, then the nearest confederation ship will have to try to pick it up instead, and that won’t look good for any of us.”
“We’ll be able to handle it, don’t worry,” Seokjin said. “I actually was friends with a Vixx at the Academy. I remember a lot of what he said.”
“Then why didn’t you tell us about the whole “strong leaders need a mate” thing?” Namjoon asked.
“I had no idea about it. ‘How long do you examine the penises of other species’ isn’t exactly something that comes up in casual conversation.”
“Listen, just don’t fuck up, and we’ll be in and out of there before you know it.” Yoongi sighed.
“I believe in hyung,” Jeongguk piped up. He grinned. “And captain too, of course.”
“Eyes on the stars and watch where you’re going, you brat,” Yoongi said, before Namjoon could say anything. Seokjin looked like he was trying not to laugh, biting his lower lip.
“I don’t think we’ll have anything to worry about,” Namjoon said, “and if we do, we’ll have everyone else as back up, right?”
Jeongguk and Yoongi nodded once, and Seokjin reached out and touched the back of Namjoon’s hand with a brush of his fingertips for comfort. He seemed to be taking what Namjoon had said about touching more often to heart, and made a point of it whenever he could. He wasn’t showy about it, which was the worst part. All of his touches were natural, running his fingers through Namjoon’s hair, their hands brushing as they walked past each other, fleeting touches with his fingertips.
The worst part of this mission wouldn’t be the diplomacy, which in all honestly Namjoon was good at, even though he’d caused a few blow ups that no one liked to let him forget about. Instead, the hardest part was going to be pretending like he loved Seokjin, but at the end of the day having to act like he didn’t really, truly mean it.
The Vixx were expecting them, so that made landing much easier. A group of six Vixx were waiting for them at the landing sight, all dressed in robes of orange, blue, and green.
The Vixx were humanoid beings, the only differences from humans really being that they had an extra eye where a human’s eyebrow should be--eyes that they were keeping closed for the benefit of their current company, apparently--and their skin was so translucent that their veins, pumping purple blood, were clearly visible.
“Welcome, Bangtan,” the Vixx wearing wearing the most elaborate robes stepped up to them. N, Namjoon remembered reading in his briefings. The Vixx had names in their own language, but since the planet was taught the common tongue, they named themselves for the convenience of visitors. “And you are Captain Kim?” he asked, looking at Namjoon.
“Yes,” Namjoon nodded. “And this is my husband, Kim Seokjin” he stumbled a bit over the word husband, but no one seemed to think of it, so Namjoon hoped that meant that no one noticed how strange it sounded on his tongue.
Seokjin bowed. His hand found Namjoon’s, and he threaded their fingers together. “It’s a pleasure to be able to see Vixx in all of its glory. I have heard many things.”
“Yes, Ken told us that he relayed to you some of our secrets.”
Seokjin lit up. His grip around Namjoon’s hand grew tighter. “Is he here?”
N nodded once. “Behind me,” he said, and his face transformed into an estimation of a smile.
One of the Vixx that stayed behind waved, and Seokjin waved back, before turning his attention back to N and Namjoon.
“You must be hungry,” N said suddenly. “Come, we have prepared a feast for you, as well as a place to sleep. We do so as a symbol of our hospitality, and our willingness to give our orb to you.”
“We thank you,” Namjoon said. He took one last look at the ship and the rest of its crew over his shoulder, before letting himself be led away, Seokjin’s hand still in his.
Namjoon knew that nothing on the planet Vixx was dangerous to humans, so he felt more than comfortable eating the huge piles of food that the Vixx placed in front of him. Seokjin probably knew that the food was safe too, not that it would have mattered if it hadn’t been. Seokjin faced the food of the universe as if it was a monster and he was a warrior, tasked with vanquishing it all, no matter how dangerous. He would put anything into his mouth, and had, much to his detriment and the amount of vomit the ship’s plumbing had seen.
They were seated at a long banquet table that faced a field where other, lower tables were placed. All of the crew minus Jeongguk--who wasn’t allowed off the ship when it was docked for official business--were seated there, in the middle of a group of Vixx. Hoseok and Taehyung were chatting with everyone seated around them as if they were best friends, so Namjoon knew that negotiations were going well.
Seokjin and his Vixx friend, Ken, were seated next to each other, and Seokjin had been using this as an excuse to catch up while stuffing the most organic matter that they had seen in months into his face.
Namjoon was more than happy just to eat, and make small talk to N who was seated next to him, when Ken called for his attention.
Ken leaned in towards Seokjin, as though he didn't want to be overheard. “So tell me how the two of you became mates,” he said, reaching over to grab something from Hyuk’s plate. “Here we choose mates based on biological compatibility, but it’s different for humans, hmmm? We’ve all heard the stories about human love, of course. Your kind talk about it as if it’s one of the unknowable laws of the universe, so I am curious to know how this came about.”
Seokjin and Namjoon exchanged a look. They hadn’t come up with a story, because neither of them expected that anyone would ask, or even care about how they got together. What was supposed to matter was that they were together, that they smelled like each other, that they were able to prove themselves as best they could.
Luckily, Namjoon had a story for this after all.
“Well...” Namjoon looked at Seokjin, and let his expression soften into a smile. He let all the fondness that he had ever felt for Seokjin make its way onto his face. He wasn’t the greatest actor in the universe, but this was easy, because it felt like letting go of something he’d been trying to protect for so long. “When I first met hyung, I wasn’t sure how to feel about him. I wasn’t sure if I liked him, because he wasn’t the same kind of soldier that I was. He didn’t, in my opinion, fight for the right reasons. But the more I talked to him, the more I got to know him, the more I realized that his reasons were just as valid as mine. He changed the way that I looked at the whole galaxy. He changed me, for the better, and made me a better captain by forcing me to open my mind and see things in the way other people saw them. And when I realized that he did that...I realized that I loved him. Seokjin hyung...he’s hardworking and dedicated and loyal, and he truly cares about people, and out of everyone that I’ve ever met, I’m the gladdest that I met him. I’m glad that knowing him has changed me. So, that’s why I married him.”
If asked, Namjoon would have said that he grabbed Seokjin’s hand because it looked good. The real reason, however, was that Namjoon simply wanted to grab Seokjin’s hand. He wanted to feel Seokjin’s skin under his own, after baring himself like that. He felt vulnerable, but for some reason, knowing that Seokjin was with him helped ease that some.
Namjoon could only bring himself to look at Seokjin’s face after he held his hand. Seokjin’s expression was unreadable, unknowable, but Namjoon thought that his eyes might have been shining, a little. Before Namjoon had the opportunity to look closer, Seokjin turned to face Ken.
“I just thought he was cute,” Seokjin said with a grin and a wink, and everyone laughed. He leaned in to peck Namjoon’s cheek, and more noises were made. Ken was doing his estimation of a smile at them both as Namjoon’s cheek burned. Seokjin’s movement had been so fast and quick, hardly even there, but Namjoon still felt it like a brand.
Seokjin grabbed Namjoon’s jaw with this free hand to show him off, turning him this way and that like something going up for auction. “Look at this face, wouldn’t you marry it?” he asked no one in particular, but there was plenty of affirmative noises anyway.
The conversation soon turned to other things, but Seokjin never let go of Namjoon’s hand.
The sleeping chambers were underground, as that was where all inhabitants of the planet rested, and so that was where N and Ken led Seokjin and Namjoon after the festivities were all done. Namjoon would have preferred to sleep on his ship with the rest of the crew, but that appeared to be out of the question since he didn’t want to cause any offense.
The tunnels were dimly lit with green light, and they seemed to be walking a long time before they were finally stopped at one of the open gaps in the wall. “Your room,” Ken said, and grinned. The Vixx didn’t bother to stay and make small talk, simply walking away without saying anything else.
The lighting scheme was the same in their room as it was in the tunnels, a eerie green glow thrown over everything. There was nothing in the room at all except for the bed, which was round and black and took up most of the space. When Namjoon sat down on it, experimentally, it seemed to suck him in like quicksand while firming up to the point that it made Namjoon bounce too.
“Well that’s...something,” Namjoon said.
“I’m not sleeping on the floor,” Seokjin told him. “So we’re sleeping on this bed, together, because I’m not sleeping here alone either.” He went to get a blanket out of his bag, which had been moved to this room along with Namjoon’s without their knowledge. “Let’s just get to sleep.”
“What do you think we should do if we have to go pee?” Namjoon asked conversationally, taking off his shoes and shirt and getting into bed.
“Hold it,” Seokjin told him flatly, though there was a smile in his voice. He and Namjoon laid there side by side for the length of a few heartbeats, before he turned to Namjoon.
“This is silly,” Seokjin said, and he rolled into Namjoon’s arms.
They had only slept in Namjoon’s quarters on the ship for a couple of nights, but they’d fallen into it easily. The second night they had started the night out not touching, and then ending up tangled up in each other in the morning. Sometime during the night Seokjin always seemed to end up using him as a human body pillow, or ending up half on top of him. After that there didn’t seem to be any reason to start out apart.
Namjoon never minded the weight or the heat when he woke up. He had luxuriated in it instead, glad that he got the chance to experience it, for whatever little time that he could.
And this was all in a bed made for humans. The bed they were in now was clearly not meant for them. The only comfortable and natural things there were the blankets that Seokjin had the foresight to pack, and each other.
Of course Seokjin would want that familiarity, Namjoon thought. He held his arms open so Seokjin could position himself properly before wrapping Seokjin up in them.
“What do you think we’re going to do tomorrow?” Namjoon asked, still unable to go to sleep. Seokjin’s head was on his shoulder, face pressed into his neck, and Namjoon’s heart was pounding in his chest.
Seokjin sighed, and Namjoon could feel it with his whole body. “I don’t really know,” he said. “Ken didn’t really say, but Yoongi’s message made it sound like things are going well on his end.”
“Yeah,” Namjoon agreed. “We’ll be able to leave soon then.” He shifted a little, trying not to jostle Seokjin, and the whole bed shifted with him.
Seokjin hummed. Then he took a deep breath and said, “That was a good story you told.” He added, “at the banquet, I mean, about me,” when Namjoon didn’t respond.
“Writing all those mission reports had to be good for something,” Namjoon said. He didn’t know what else there was to say, other than the truth, which he felt like he couldn’t tell. Not yet, anyway. Maybe some day, when they were both older and not living on the same ship, when this flame had gone down some and Namjoon had stopped quietly burning. Maybe then, but certainly not now, with Seokjin in his arms.
“I guess you’re right,” Seokjin said, but he sounded kind of sad. Before Namjoon could say anything else his breathing had evened out, warm against Namjoon’s neck, and Namjoon followed him into sleep.
In the morning they’re led to a chamber where there’s food laid out on a table for them. No one else eats, just the humans in the room, and the Vixx wait politely until Namjoon and Seokjin are done eating before leading them out to a ship that takes them to various places around their planet. The rest of the crew did not come with them, instead staying behind to negotiate and see if there was anything in the main port city of Vixx that they could buy to refuel on.
Namjoon didn’t feel the need to say anything all morning, more than content to listen to Hyuk talk about the natural vegetation of Vixx, which was almost all gone in favor of the biological advancements that had been made in the last few decades. These mutated plants were, according to Hyuk, much more energy efficient.
“Our planet feeds on itself,” Hyuk said as Namjoon rubbed a soft leaf between two of his fingers. This part of missions always reminded him of when he was younger, and had wanted to be a scientist that had visited new worlds and wrote about his findings. That dream had shattered the moment Bangtan had been decimated, but with his life sometimes he still got tastes of it. “It’s why we try our best to continuously improve our energy resources, or find new ways to breed our young.”
Namjoon nodded, accepting this without question. He continued walking where he was led, and eventually Seokjin made his way to him. “Have you checked your scroll lately?” he asked, low enough that no one else in their group would be able to hear them.
“Just this morning, why?” Namjoon asked, stiffening up.
“Yoongi just sent me a message telling me that you should.”
He grabbed it out of his pocket. He hadn’t even heard his scroll ring, to engaged on what was happening here. He only had two unread messages. The first one was from Hoseok, last night, that had pictures of the crew and what they were doing. Namjoon appreciated it, but was sure it wasn’t as urgent as the little icon next to the subject line made it out to be, as no one was injured or dying.
The other message was from Yoongi, and Namjoon cursed when he read it.
Seokjin was immediately on alert. “What is it?” he asked, his face remaining pleasant even as he tried to read over Namjoon’s shoulder.
Namjoon closed his scroll before anyone else could read what was going on. He threw his arm over Seokjin’s shoulder and whispered into his ear, “Yoongi says that they still won’t give him the orb. They’re stalling, for some reason.”
Seokjin leaned closer, wrapping his arm around Namjoon’s waist. “That doesn’t make any sense,” Seokjin said, his breath warm next to Namjoon’s ear. “Why are they doing this?”
“Yoongi says it’s not hostile, that the ritual might just be something cultural, but...I really don’t know. They might just want to keep us here longer, but I can’t figure out a reason for why that would be.”
“Do they want something from us?”
“I don’t know what that would be. Yoongi says that they already got a tour of the ship...” Namjoon trailed off. “Yoongi says that it doesn’t seem aggressive, so I don’t know how much of it is them wanting something from us, or just them trying to delay us.”
“I don’t like it either way,” Seokjin whispered with a smile. He leaned in and pecked Namjoon’s cheek again before turning out to the crowd of Vixx surrounding them. “This is so nice, almost like the honeymoon we didn’t get to take. Vixx is a fascinating place.”
Hyuk, from the front of the group, seemed to blush, the veins around his face growing wider and more purple. “Thank you,” he said, and Seokjin beamed in return.
“We’ll be sad to leave it,” Namjoon said.
N bowed his head. “We will be sad to see you go,” he replied. “However it is customary that guests stay for at least three days on our planet, so we do hope to see you stay the entire duration of your welcome here.”
“Can you reply to Yoongi and say that we were just told that it’s for customary reasons?” Namjoon asked, knowing that if he did this it would not be subtle.
“Of course,” Seokjin said, rummaging around in his own pockets. “I think I believe them, though. I’ve been talking to Ken, and the Vixx are people that run on customs, as the rest of their life and planet is based on experimentation.”
“I hope you’re right.” Namjoon let out a breath, but forced his face to remain neutral. “I don’t want to fight anyone. The sooner we can stop pretending like this, the better.”
The easy look slid off Seokjin’s face, and he moved from under Namjoon’s arm. Before Namjoon could ask why, Seokjin was smiling again. “Of course,” he said, and turned to go talk to Ken again.
Namjoon was let with the distinct feeling that he had done or said something wrong in regards to Seokjin. He just wasn’t sure, exactly, what.
As it turned out, all of their worry that morning had been for nothing. When Seokjin and Namjoon had managed to meet up with Yoongi again, he said that everything was all clear.
“It was just a fucking mess this morning,” Yoongi told them as he put a can of food into his pack. He was giving them another bag full of “human necessities” to take back to their room, which was the reason they had given for wanting to go back on their ship. “But Taehyung and Jimin are retrieving the orb right now, and we should be able to go soon. We just can’t leave before the customary three days, is the impression that I got. So don’t do anything to fuck this up, got it?”
“There’s nothing to fuck up,” Namjoon told him. Seokjin took the newly filled bag and placed it across his shoulders, double checking that it had everything he wanted. “Seriously, it’s all been tours and an exchange of information all day.”
“Good,” Yoongi said. “Keep it that way.”
The next morning, breakfast was a far more formal affair. Namjoon was seated next to N, and far from Seokjin, who was at the other end of the table talking to Ken and Ravi. This time, they weren’t the only ones eating, and for some reason Namjoon got the distinct feeling that they were being buttered up for something.
His suspicions were proven correct when N asked, out of nowhere, “How often do humans copulate? I’ve never had the chance to ask one before.”
Namjoon choked on his piece of fruit. Seokjin looked over, eyebrows raised, but Namjoon just shook his head. He turned back to N. “Well...whenever we feel the urge, mostly. Especially if you can’t...copulate...for breeding purposes the way that Seokjin and I can’t.”
“I see,” N said, steepling his fingers together. He had six of them, Namjoon noticed somewhere in the back of his mind, when before Namjoon had been sure that he had only counted five. He’d have to change that on the reports. “Do you not feel comfortable enough here to fornicate, then? We gave you a specific room for your pleasure.”
The fact that N was so serious and earnest about it had to be the worst part. He seemed to be genuinely asking Namjoon if he and Seokjin were comfortable enough to have sex, and Namjoon couldn’t help the blush that made its way to his face at the very thought.
“Ah, no. We were just tired yesterday. It has been a long time since we were able to explore the way that you so graciously allowed us to yesterday.”
N smiled. “Good,” he said. “Since you’re to stay just a bit longer, we are glad to do whatever we can to make your time here better. And if you could, of course, mention this to the Big Bang council so they might be so inclined to give us more funding for our experimentation, all the better...”
Namjoon understood immediately. “Of course,” he said, and turned back to his food. He hoped he didn’t have to talk about having sex with Seokjin to anyone else for a long time.
“I think, uh...I think the Vixx are waiting for us to have sex in this bed,” Namjoon told Seokjin later, when they got some free time before dinner.
Seokjin laughed, before catching Namjoon’s expression. “Oh asteroids, you’re serious.” Namjoon told him what N had said that morning, at breakfast.
“Do you think they’re going to use our sex sweat for one of their weird experiments?” Seokjin asked, nose wrinkling.
“I don’t know,” Namjoon said, “but it kind of seems like leaving is going to be a lot harder if they don’t have any evidence of us...um...copulating. Or, more like, they’re definitely expecting it? Which is weird, but given the literature on humans floating around I guess it’s not too surprising.”
“Hmm,” Seokjin said. “It’s not like we can get away with jumping on our bunks with the doors closed and making moaning noises. So I guess we can just have sex? Unless, of course, you don’t want to have sex with me. And it’s fine if you don’t, seriously, no pressure at all. I just...don’t think it would be that big of a deal, is all.”
Of course Seokjin wouldn’t think having sex would be that big of a deal, Namjoon thought to himself. He wasn’t in love with Namjoon, would be able to write this off as another sexual experience, nothing more than that. It wouldn’t keep Seokjin awake some nights, remembering what Namjoon sounded like, what he felt like, how good it had been, the way it would haunt Namjoon.
But Namjoon was an adult, and he wanted to have sex with Seokjin, even if he knew that it meant more to him. Even if it had to happen on this weird bed because the aliens, literally, made them do it.
“No, of course I want to have sex with you,” Namjoon said, forcing out the words before he could trip all over them and make a mess of things. “Why wouldn’t I?”
Seokjin beamed at the implied compliment. “It’s settled, then. We’ll have sex tonight, and then we can go back to the ship in the morning.”
“Sounds good,” Namjoon said, and did his best to tuck his heart back into his chest where it belonged. There was no place for it here.
Dinner was once again a big affair, but Namjoon found that he couldn’t eat. He found himself unable to sit still, leg bouncing up and down instead, pushing his food around on his plate. Beside him, Seokjin didn’t seem to be having the same problem, eating and talking with whoever was sitting beside him.
It wasn’t that Namjoon hadn’t had sex before, because he had. It was just, this was Seokjin. Namjoon had had sex before, but he’d never cared for any of them the way he cared for Seokjin in this moment, he’d never wanted and loved someone with his whole body like this before. It was scary.
By the time Seokjin and Namjoon were led back to their sleeping chambers, Namjoon was feeling stiff, nervousness simmering in his stomach.
Once the door shut behind them, Seokjin peered into Namjoon’s face. “Are you okay?” he asked, reaching out and touching Namjoon’s face. When he realized that Namjoon wasn’t sick, understanding bloomed across his face. “Namjoon, we don’t really have to have sex,” Seokjin said. “It’s not like we won’t be able to leave without it.”
“No,” Namjoon said. “I want to.”
Seokjin just looked at him. “Are you sure?”
“Yes,” Namjoon said, and before Seokjin could ask anything else Namjoon gathered all of the courage that was left in his body and kissed him.
Seokjin reacted immediately, his lips changing from a half formed word back into a kiss that matched Namjoon’s. Seokjin opened his mouth, letting Namjoon in, and that was all it took. Namjoon could feel himself opening up, felt Seokjin open in return, and all his nervousness melt away. He was kissing Seokjin, yes, but that also meant that he was kissing Seokjin, who he had known for years, who he’d been on a ship with for years, who he had slowly but surely grown to trust and love.
When they pulled away, panting, Namjoon said between breaths, “I’m fine, really.”
Seokjin didn’t answer beyond kissing Namjoon and pushing him into the bed. Namjoon let himself go easily. His dick was heavy in his pants, and he could feel Seokjin’s hard against his stomach. They had just been kissing, but they were both so affected that it left Namjoon a little light headed. He could have stayed on this cliff edge of pleasure forever.
Distantly, Namjoon could feel the bed shifting underneath him, but he didn’t care when Seokjin was on top of him. Neither of them seemed to want to stop long enough to get undressed, until Seokjin made a frustrated noise in the back of his throat and took off his shirt and tugged on Namjoon’s until his was off too.
“Take off your pants,” Seokjin said, getting off the bed to rummage in his bag and step out of his own at the same time. He brought out a packet of lube and a condom with a triumphant grin.
“Where did you get that?” First the soju, now this. How much contraband was on his ship that Namjoon didn’t know about?
“Jimin and Yo-”
“Stop right there,” Namjoon said, and Seokjin grinned. “Seriously, I don’t want to know.”
“Thought so,” Seokjin said, and leaned in to kiss him again.
The heat between them seemed to only grow now that they were naked, and Namjoon could feel the sweat growing between their skin, making everything slick and hot. Namjoon pressed himself into Seokjin’s skin just to keep chasing that feeling. Seokjin’s hands and skin and lips were everywhere, and Namjoon felt like putty under his hands, shaped however Seokjin wanted him.
“You,” Namjoon said, pulling away. Seokjin just moved his mouth to Namjoon’s lips, sucking gently on the thin skin there, the slightest grazing of his teeth. Namjoon shuddered. “You should get inside me,” he said with no tact and no other way to say it, tracing the vein on the underside of Seokjin’s dick with his fingers.
Seokjin groaned. Without saying anything else he rolled over, leaving Namjoon on top. “Then you should let me get you ready for that,” he told Namjoon, hand searching for the lube, the whole while keeping his eyes on Namjoon’s face.
He warmed the lube between his fingers, moving slowly at first and then faster the more fingers that he hadded. Namjoon grabbed onto Seokjin’s shoulders as he moved up and down on them, taking his own pleasure, biting his lip to keep from moaning each time Seokjin’s fingers moved inside of him.
At first he thought the bouncing was just him, but once all of Seokjin’s fingers were out of him so Seokjin could put on the condom, he realized that the bed was moving even when they were not, too big to be simple reverberations.
“Is it just me,” Namjoon began, “or has the bed been moving weirdly this entire time?”
“Don’t think about it,” Seokjin said. Namjoon decided to listen to him, since Seokjin’s desires were the same as his dick’s.
Namjoon couldn’t hold in his moan when he sank down onto Seokjin’s dick fully, fingers still clenched in Seokjin’s shoulders. For several moments he felt embarrassed at the sound, but when he looked at Seokjin’s face his eyes were dark and there was still a burning desire there, no laughter at all.
Or there was none, until Namjoon started riding Seokjin in earnest, and with that they literally started floating. The lights flickered, once, and then they were set down onto the bed again. Namjoon and Seokjin just looked at each other, stunned, before they started laughing.
“What the fuck was that?” Namjoon asked, once he was able to control himself. Somehow he and Seokjin hadn’t gotten disconnected, but it was still weird.
“Maybe it was a fluke?” Seokjin said, the slightest bit of strain in his voice. “Try it again.”
Carefully, Namjoon started moving again, his thighs burning as he did so. The first few movements were fine, and Namjoon could feel himself choking with pleasure. He had total control of the angle, and me made that work for him. But once he began moving at a speed that pleased them both, if Seokjin’s open mouthed moan was any indication, they flew back up into the air again.
“I don’t think this is going to work,” Namjoon said, laughing breathlessly and still painfully hard. Flying didn’t seem to dampen his, or Seokjin’s, desire, even with how strange it was.
“No, you’re right, it won’t.” Seokjin lifted Namjoon’s hips until he was completely out of him, and then flipped them over. He was so broad that he seemed to completely block out the rest of the world. Namjoon placed a hand on his back just to feel his skin, the bone and muscles working underneath as Seokjin looked down at Namjoon.
“You’re so gorgeous, Joonie” he said, quietly, like he couldn’t believe he was saying it. Before Namjoon could respond, Seokjin kissed him, and any questions died on Namjoon’s tongue.
The movement of Seokjin’s hips was sharp, but slick and smooth. It took him several strokes to find the right rhythm, but once he did, Namjoon had to keep himself from crying out at every thrust, the pleasure deep and pinpointed.
“Let me hear you,” Seokjin said, and so Namjoon gave up on trying to hold himself together. He clutched onto Seokjin and let Seokjin surround him, his hands on Seokjin’s back while Seokjin stroked his cock.
Beneath them, the bed slithered around their bodies and the lights started flickering again, but in this position Namjoon barely noticed. All he noticed--all he wanted to notice--was Seokjin.
When Namjoon came it was sharp, and fast, and he was completely surprised by it. “Do you want me to keep going?” Seokjin asked, once he realized what had happened. Namjoon nodded, wanting to feel Seokjin come inside of him, even if he was so sensitive it almost hurt.
Namjoon felt Seokjin shudder when he finally came too, his face open and gorgeous. Namjoon put his hand on Seokjin’s cheek, just to make sure it was real, when Seokjin pulled out. Seokjin grabbed his hand and took it off, pressed a kiss into his palm instead and held on tight.
“That was good, Joonie,” he said finally, his voice a little raspy from deep and satisfying sex. Namjoon could have listened to him say Joonie in that tone a hundred times, a thousand, a million. He tried not to think about the fact that this would likely be the only time he’d hear it.
“Too good,” Namjoon said instead, wanting to focus on anything else except for the way his heart was aching.
“What do you mean?” Seokjin frowned.
“Look, the lights, they’re yellow now.” And so much brighter, for that matter. There wasn’t any trace of the low green lighting--instead it was like they were standing outside under the heat of the sun. Beneath them, the bed moved again.
“...You’re right...”
“I think the bed transferred the energy from our sex into energy for the planet,” Namjoon hypothesized. “I think...the bed is made of organic matter and this is the result. We helped give the Vixx energy anyway.”
“Stars...” Seokjin trailed off. When he caught Namjoon’s eye they both started to laugh uproariously. Namjoon bent over from the hilarity, but his hand was still caught in Seokjin’s grip. He kept it there, the entire time he was laughing.
“When do you think the lights will go back to normal so we can get to sleep?” Namjoon asked.
Seokjin hummed. “Never probably,” he said, his voice thick with humor. “Apparently our ‘copulating’ was so good we’ll keep the lights on for days. Look, there’s even light coming from the hallway too.”
“You’re right...” Namjoon trailed off, and they laughed again. “This is so weird. Honestly, top ten weirdest things that have happened to me on a mission. And we had a tribble infestation on the ship once.”
“This is the weirdest,” Seokjin agreed. “But I’m glad I got to experience this weirdness with you.”
Namjoon smiled, soft and private. He pulled his hand away from Seokjin. “Me too,” he said, and flopped back onto the bed to try to sleep.
In the morning all of the crew got to eat breakfast with Namjoon and Seokjin, as it was their last day on the planet. Once they were done with this ceremony they would be free to go on their way, the seventh Obsaeron Orb safely settled in the cockpit of the ship.
“You must come visit us again,” N told Namjoon, peeling some fruit. This morning the Vixx were all eating with them as well. “And if you cannot, then perhaps we’ll visit you.”
“It would be nice to see everyone again, and to continue to hear more about your planet’s search for renewable energy,” Namjoon told him, nodding even though he knew it was unlikely that they would have any extended stops for someone to visit any time soon.
“We would also like to thank you for your contribution to adding to the energy to our planet.” N sounded deathly serious. “We could all feel when our planet became more alive.”
“Oh,” Namjoon said, unsure of what to say. He just knew that it would be rude to start laughing, so he popped some organic matter into his mouth and chewed before saying, “It was our pleasure.”
N nodded and drifted away, and Namjoon immediately stood to find Seokjin, knowing that he couldn’t keep what just happened to himself.
“I was just thanked,” Namjoon said, voice low, when Seokjin turned around to look at him, “for our contribution to the energy of the planet Vixx last night. And I couldn’t think of anything else to say, so I told him it was our pleasure.”
“What?” Seokjin said, mouth twitching the longer he looked at Namjoon. And then he started to laugh, throwing his head back. Namjoon, as unable to resist as always, began to laugh too.
“What’s so funny?” Taehyung asked, brows furrowed, but neither Seokjin or Namjoon could stop laughing long enough to answer him.
The farther away from planet Vixx the ship got, the less comfortable Namjoon was around Seokjin. He started out the journey to the next planet--called RV, the orders had just come in that day--in the navigation room with Seokjin and Jeongguk, where he usually stayed. Only he found that pretending that he was fine, like the hadn’t been enjoying the farce he and Seokjin had put on, like he wasn’t so in love with Seokjin that it pressed on his lungs and made it hurt to breathe sometimes, was a bit too much when he’d woken up that morning with Seokjin in his arms.
So he’d chosen to move around the ship instead, going to the operations room with Hoseok and Yoongi, before Yoongi asked him what the hell he thought he was doing, and told him to go do something else and get out of their hair. He’d then made his way down to the engine room with Taehyung and Jimin, who let him stay there until it was time for dinner.
As Jeongguk had the night watch in the navigation room, the way he always did the night after a mission was completed, so the rest of them could rest, Namjoon made his way down to his bunk early. He just wanted to sleep and in the morning he would pretend that everything was fine and good, to reinstate his mantle as captain and put this all behind him as a captain should. But for tonight he just wanted to be allowed to mourn that his bed was too big for him now.Pretending with Seokjin had only been for a week, just a week, but for Namjoon it felt like it had last forever.
Namjoon was dozing when the knock on the door came. Namjoon always answered a knock on his door, which the entire crew knew, because he wanted to make sure that if anyone needed them, he was there for them. And so he dragged himself out of bed, hoping that it was an emergency or something else that he could distract himself with, only to find himself face to face with Seokjin.
Seokjin stepped into Namjoon’s quarters without any ceremony, and without even asking. “You’re avoiding me,” he said, sitting on the edge of Namjoon’s bed. “Why?”
Namjoon had expected to be asked so directly, or for Seokjin to even notice. “I always examine parts of the ship when we start flying again,” he said, finding it hard to look at Seokjin.
“Yes, but you always come back. Today you didn’t come back. And you wouldn’t even look at me at dinner, even though you were fine this morning.”
“Sorry, I-” Namjoon began, unsure of where he was going with this. I’m sorry, I love you, sometimes it hurts to pretend, was completely uncharted territory, too risky to navigate.
“You know, when we learned about what the mission entailed, I asked Yoongi to help me. So he made sure I picked the shortest straw from the bunch.”
“You. But. You what?”
Seokjin just smiled at his confusion, looking down at his hands as he did so. “I just...I wanted to know what it was like to be someone special to you, even if it was just for pretend. I’ve...had feelings for you since before I kissed you last year, and I-” he looked back up at Namjoon, his eyes dark and lovely in his face. Namjoon wanted to lean in and kiss him, wanted to put his hand on the curve of Seokjin’s cheek. “I wanted to have sex with you too, even if you didn’t feel the same way, even if our levels of want didn’t match up. So I’m not sorry, and I don’t regret anything. I’ll only regret it if you shut me out. If we can’t be friends, or even just crewmates. So I’m dealing with this now.”
“I wasn’t, I mean-” Namjoon ran a hand through his hair, trying to figure out the right words for what he wanted to say. “I love you,” is what his mouth finally came up with. “I love you, and I’m sorry I avoided you today, I just-”
Seokjin’s expression was so bright and beautiful that, for a moment, Namjoon wanted to look away. He had travelled all over the galaxy but he hadn’t seen anything as beautiful as Seokjin's face at that moment.
“Good,” Seokjin said finally. “I’m glad that you love me too. That makes it easier to do this.” Before Namjoon could even attempt to say anything else, Seokjin leaned in to kiss him. The kiss wasn’t anything special, on a technical level. Just lips on lips, the barest pressure, nothing deep or heated. But for Namjoon, it meant everything, it was so much, because it was the first kiss between them that they had shared that during it, Namjoon knew that Seokjin loved him back.
“You should stay in here, with me, tonight,” Namjoon said, a little breathless though there was nothing to be breathless about, when they pulled away. “And every night, if you want.”
Seokjin just smiled again. “I do want,” he said, his smile becoming something unreadable, a little unknowable, but mostly, it reflected the happiness that Namjoon felt blooming inside of his chest. Namjoon wanted to reach out and touch it. Realizing that his touch might not be unwanted, now, he did just that.
If it was the universe's prerogative to be unknowable, then it could be Seokjin's too. Namjoon was willing to spend the rest of his life learning them both.