Archive of Our Own

There are a few indisputable truths in Lee Minho’s life.

A few things that everyone that knows him well enough knows they shape Minho into who he is, makes him see the world in his own, unique way.

He loves his cats like crazy.

He prefers to spend his free time alone.

He loves Han Jisung with all his heart.

It was unexpected, really, to join JYPE and find someone like Jisung there. To start his dream with seven other guys around his age and immediately click with the one that wasn’t over his rebellious phase. To find a light in all the darkness that debuting was for him.

It could have been tough, Minho knows. It could have been a disastrous, one-sided crush that led into nothing but disappointment, that threatened the stability of the group until he got his shit together and forgot about the shine in Jisung’s eyes.

Instead, it was soft, comforting. It was countless days and nights spent knowing each other, navigating their feelings with the uncertainty of what would happen the next day. Weeks shaped into months, and then into years of Minho discovering the intricacies of Jisung’s mind. At the same time, Jisung dismantled every single wall Minho had put around himself the second he was out in the spotlight.

It was in between stolen glances and held hands that Minho realized he was in love with Jisung. That the crush he harbored for his band-mate over the time they spent together meant more than just liking the moments they shared.

For Minho, it was the way Jisung simply understood him. The way they never fought, but bickered instead. The way Jisung always found comfort in Minho’s words, which made Minho feel like he was doing something good, after all. And it definitely was the way Minho could count on Jisung the few times he needed his help, without berating the fact that he did.

Jisung saw Minho exactly for who he was.

Despite how well it turned out to be, Minho still had to be patient. Minho had known he was gay as soon as he had the mental capacity to process such a thing, but Jisung was different. He grew up in a different way, had different experiences during his childhood. The few times Jisung talked about Malaysia, he mentioned a girl he shared his first kiss with. He talked about finding certain female trainees pretty. He saw love through the glasses of Howl and Sophie, or through the many other dramas he binged together with Minho.

But Minho knew that wasn’t all for Han Jisung. He knew Jisung looked at him longer than deemed acceptable when they changed clothes in between performances, ogled his belly and his thighs. Minho also knew about his internet endeavors when Jisung thought there was no one else around, because he wasn’t particularly discreet, either.

But, at the end, it only took being Jisung’s proclaimed soulmate to be the first one to know Jisung considered himself bisexual. And, even if it was in between tears and hugs and questions of "what am I going to do now, hyung?", Jisung accepted himself with the help of everyone else’s love.

After that, everything else fell into place without rush.

Jisung became more daring with his touches, his intentions. He took Minho to dates without mentioning they were dates, making Minho’s chest grow twice its size every time he saw Jisung dressed up just for him. They hugged longer, cuddled to sleep many nights and, most of the times, Jisung was the one to initiate the contact.

As Jisung grew bolder, so did Minho. He brought Jisung to his home back in Gimpo, to bathe his cats and meet his parents. He introduced Jisung to his friends, getting along so well to the point they agreed to meet again just after the first time. He ended up witnessing Jisung intertwine himself with every single crevice of Minho’s life, something that Jisung did willingly every time, and that Minho welcomed with open arms.

It was Jisung, at the end, who ended up confessing his feelings first.

Even if Minho wanted to hold Jisung even closer, to tell him how much he loved him, he kept quiet. Because Jisung needed his time, and his space, and Jisung was too precious to taint him with feelings that he wasn’t actually sure they were reciprocated.

But Minho guesses patience eventually brings you the best in life, because one second Jisung was holding his hand beside the Han River, and the next he was confessing he was in love with Minho.

It took every fiber of Minho’s being not to kiss him right then and there.

It also took everything in Minho not to cry, because he never cries. But the vulnerability and the wobbliness of Jisung’s voice when he said those three words did irreparable damage to Minho’s heart, to the point a few tears ended up falling down anyways. Jisung wiped them all away.

Because the person Minho adores the most adored him back. Because, after years of pining for the most important person in his life, it was the green puzzle piece that finally fit seamlessly with the oddly-shaped pink one.

Dating Jisung changed nothing and everything at the same time. They still bicker, still cuddle, still go on dates. But now Minho is able to hold his hand in private, to hug him after dance practice and not let go. He’s able to share how much he loves him with the few people he wants to do so, even if everyone knew already.

And, most importantly, he can kiss him now.

They shared their first kiss a few days after they shared their feelings for each other. It was an awkward peck more than a steady kiss, because the last time Minho kissed someone, it was his dance crew friend – and it was his first kiss.

It was theirs, nonetheless, inexperienced and entirely beautiful.

The second one was seconds after. And then the third came, and the fourth, and the rest of them that were shared in the intimacy of Minho’s room. Lips touching and hands wandering to places never explored before, to the small of Jisung’s waist and the softness of Minho’s hair. With the question of "will you be my boyfriend, Jisung?" coming out breathless, and an "of course I will be yours, hyung" spoken just as ragged.

And, because Minho will never be able to be normal about Jisung, there’s nothing else that he wants more than to kiss him all the time.

Sharing dorms isn’t an easy feat. Living with guys your age means you’ll hear things you never wanted to hear, smell things that shouldn’t even exist. It means having to use your time wisely, because one second you could be kissing your boyfriend, and three other people could be walking into the living room holding six boxes of pizza the next.

Changbin still reminds them of that one.

It’s not an easy feat, but Minho and Jisung have been dating for almost three months, and it’s almost impossible to have even a bit of privacy.

It’s a tempting idea to make everyone else regret having the gift of hearing. Minho wants to touch Jisung, to explore things with him without a single piece of clothing. He wants to know how it feels to be held by Jisung’s hands without having to worry they will have to cut it short, to hear Jisung’s little sounds as they experience all of their firsts together.

Minho wants to simply exist with Jisung without having to dread that someone will hear them love each other.

That’s why, Minho decides, it’s the perfect opportunity to bring Jisung camping with him.

Not too far away from the dorm but pretty secluded nonetheless, there’s a camping spot Minho loves to go to. With a plot reserved just for them, Minho could teach Jisung how to fish in the river, and maybe cook it later in the night. They could eat together under the stars, while Jisung yaps about constellations and Minho looks at him like he hung those exact ones. And then, just before going to sleep, they could finally shed their clothes and experience what belonging to each other feels like.

It’s not like Minho has any idea of what he has to do, and neither does Jisung. The only experience Minho has is with his hand and his pink dildo buried in the confines of his belongings back at the dorm, and Jisung is not faring any better.

He admitted the other day that he only tried fingering himself twice.

But none of that is going to stop Minho from fantasizing about it, about Jisung. Because he might not have a single clue about how to give a blowjob, but he sure as hell knows he wants to try it with Jisung. And it’s not his fault that his boyfriend is the hottest person he’s ever seen, nor the fact that more often than not, he spends his showers thinking about him. Thinking about his small frame and his ridiculously beautiful eyes, and about his quiet moans when they jerk each other off in Jisung’s bed.

And perhaps, just perhaps, about everything going well, and them finally going a step further into their relationship.

♡

The opportunity to go camping presents itself a week after Minho has the idea.

They’re in between recording new songs and rehearsing for their next tour, and luckily they’ve been granted a free weekend to rest in between their hectic schedules.

It surprises Jisung at first, the idea of going camping with Minho. He notes how it’s something Minho usually likes to do alone, and how he doesn’t want to invade something so precious to him.

Minho thinks Jisung is even more precious to think such a thing, and insists that it will be great to get away for even a night and have a bit of time for themselves.

The promise of privacy sells it to Jisung.

So, when the day comes, Minho takes his time preparing everything, making sure he grabs the bigger tent and his fishing rods. He gets the cooking utensils and the cooler to store what they will be buying on their way there, and stuffs a change of clothes into his overnight bag. Minho blushes when he puts a brand new bottle of lube and condoms at the bottom of it.

With everything loaded in the car the company has lent them for their small escapade, Minho finally goes to wake up Jisung. It’s endearing, Minho thinks, how cute Jisung looks when he’s deeply asleep. His face is pressed against the other pillow Minho keeps in his bed just for him, and there’s a bit of drool just under his cheek.

“Jagiya,” Minho whispers, poking Jisung on the cheek so he doesn’t get startled. “It’s time to wake up.”

The only response Minho gets is a small stir, so he pokes him again.

“Jisungie, I’m gonna leave without you,” Minho tries again, and this time it does get him a response.

“No, hyung, please,” Jisung mumbles, still half asleep. “Don’t leave me.”

Chuckling, Minho sits on the bed so he can caress Jisung’s hair out of his face.

“I’m not leaving you, silly. We need to leave for the camping, together.”

Finally opening his eyes, Jisung stares at him.

“Oh my god, the camping!”

Minho lets out a giggle at how excited Jisung seems now, even if he’s still scratching sleep out of his eyes. He couldn’t stop talking about it yesterday night, after all, nor the days before.

Jisung is truly excited to come with him, and Minho couldn’t adore him more for it.

Jeongin is having breakfast in the kitchen table when they get out of Minho’s room, Jisung fully dressed and with his overnight bag in hand.

“Morning,” Jeongin mumbles as he’s spacing out, looking at somewhere beyond his bowl of cereal.

Minho closes the distance to ruffle his hair, a gesture that doesn’t even earn him a grunt.

“What, late night yesterday?” Minho asks as he sits beside him, looking at how Jisung is fixing a bowl for himself.

“Yeah, y’all need to stop letting me play with Yongbok until four in the morning…”

This time it’s Jisung who chuckles, sitting across from Minho to have his quick breakfast.

“You do this to yourself, Innie. You just have to say no.”

Jeongin rubs his face, still more asleep than awake.

“Yeah, you could try telling him no.”

Minho laughs at Jeongin, who elbows him in retaliation.

“You’re one to laugh, hyung,” he says with a smirk, despite his eyes still being half-closed. “You could never say no to Jisung.”

“That’s not true,” Minho says with a frown, but he’s completely aware it’s the biggest bullshit he’s spewed this week.

He truly cannot say no to Jisung.

“It’s true, hyung.” This time it’s Jisung who speaks, and he looks extremely smug. “You never deny me anything.”

“Psh,” Minho deflects with a swat of his hand, crossing his arms. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Jeongin is about to add something else, but the glare that Minho sends his way stops him from saying anything more.

The rest of their breakfast goes by as quickly as it started, with Minho already having a full belly from an hour ago and Jisung finishing his food in no time. Jeongin wishes them a safe trip looking at least a little bit more awake than he was moments ago and, before they know it, Minho is already driving them under the spring morning sun.

One hour and a half away from where they live, it was Minho’s best friend who told him about this particular camping spot.

Minho was a bit wary of going so far at first but, after the first night there, he’s not wanted to go anywhere else again. It has a river nearby – a perfect spot to relax and fish, and even to have a swim if it’s warm enough. There are even stray cats in the area – Minho couldn’t be happier about the place.

Their first detour is to grab some coffee for the trip. Minho is more than aware that Jisung needs a morning coffee to function, so it’s not even ten minutes into driving through Seoul that they stop to fuel their brain. Jisung goes for his beloved iced Americano, but they sadly don’t have the almond latte Minho was craving. He’ll have to do with an iced Americano himself.

Their next stop is the supermarket, one on the outskirts of the city and big enough that hopefully they will be seen as just two young adults shopping for the weekend. They park far enough from the entrance, putting on masks so there’s less chances that anyone will recognize them.

At first, everything goes well. Walking through the endless rows of perishable foods and pre-made goods feels like domestic bliss, with Jisung pushing the cart around and Minho grabbing everything they will be needing for their trip.

A few vegetables and the best meat cuts are the first things that make it into their cart. They’re avid lovers of grilled meat, and knowing that the camping site has a barbecue in every plot of land, it’s the perfect excuse to feed his Jisungie one of the things they enjoy the most. Instant ramen cannot be left out, either, even if they plan on grilling some river fish later at night, because nobody can go camping and not have a bowl of spicy goodness.

Minho wants to grab some fruit too, and Jisung’s favorite drinks. Perhaps some sour gummies and caramel popcorn so they can have those while they watch a movie later in Jisung’s laptop, but as Minho is reaching for a bag of candy, he feels a tug on his sleeve.

“Hyung,” Jisung whispers just beside him, and Minho is versed enough in Jisung’s whole being to know that he’s wary.

Minho pretends to study the bag, avoiding to look anywhere else in case his suspicions are true. The last thing he needs is to bring themselves more attention.

“What’s wrong, Jisungie?” Minho questions as quietly as he can, leaving the bag back on the shelf and instead dragging the cart away. Jisung follows him right away.

“I think we’ve been spotted.”

Instead of turning left to the aisle of fresh fruits, Minho gently guides the cart towards the cash registers. On his periphery he notices a group of girls and, even if he tries his best not to look over, he sees how they’re whispering in between them as they’re looking right at them. For a second Minho swears one of them is angling her phone towards them and, Jisung must have seen it too, because the cart starts being pushed around quicker.

It takes no time for them to pay and pack their groceries into bags and leave the supermarket as fast as they can, with the bitter knowledge that not only their privacy had once again been invaded, but also that Minho wasn’t able to buy everything he wanted for Jisung.

As soon as they get in the car they let out a sigh at the same time, one that makes Minho laugh bitterly.

“I can’t believe they were even taking pictures of us,” Minho mumbles as he starts the car, quickly going back to the road. “We couldn’t even buy everything on the list.”

Probably sensing Minho’s building annoyance, Jisung places a hand on Minho’s thigh and softly squeezes.

“It’s alright,” Jisung says, and Minho calms down almost immediately. “At least we got the essentials, it’s okay if we didn’t get the sour gummies.”

“But they’re your favorite…”

That earns Minho a giggle from Jisung, and his lips finally stretch into a smile.

“I know, hyung, but it’s really okay.”

Minho is about to suggest they stop somewhere else to buy the rest of the stuff, but he knows better than to press further. He knows that if Jisung says it’s okay, then it really is.

The next few minutes on the road are spent with Jisung singing along to the radio, and Minho feeling a joy he rarely gets to feel. He’s always happy to have Jisung and the rest of the members around, also enjoys spending time on his own – but the absolute delight of seeing Jisung be so carefree is not something he gets to see often.

Minho definitely needs to take Jisung to more of these little escapades.

As they finally approach their destination, the traffic grows heavier. Minho is forced to slow down as more and more cars stack up ahead of them, until his view is filled with nothing but brake lights and bumpers.

They’re stuck.

At first, Minho is patient. He’s aware it’s Saturday and people are leaving the city to go anywhere else other than their usual concrete, but the more time they spend going at the speed of Minho walking through the street, the more he starts to get annoyed.

It’s nearing midday, and Minho can see how the morning is wasting away being stuck in traffic. He had planned a small trek through the woods before lunch with Jisung, one that they will probably have to postpone or do tomorrow morning.

If only they could have gone on a weekday.

The harsh grip Minho has on the wheel is making his palms sweat, and he’s finally losing his patience. He wanted this day to go perfectly, to have Jisung enjoy –

“Hey, hyung,” Jisung suddenly prompts as he lowers the volume on the radio, turning himself a bit on his seat so he's looking at Minho. “Do you want to know a really cool fact I learned the other day?”

Minho’s frown immediately disappears from his face, and he feels his shoulders slump.

“Yeah. What is it, jagi?”

Jisung turns around a bit further, now almost completely facing Minho but still wearing his seatbelt safely. He places a hand on Minho’s thigh again, and the deadly grip on the wheel turns into a softer one.

“Did you know that the brain doesn’t feel pain?”

Minho blinks at the words, but he doesn’t turn his head to look at Jisung. He can probably see his confused face like this anyways.

“What do you mean?”

“Like,” Jisung continues, now moving his free hand around as he speaks. “Of course the brain processes pain from other parts of the body, but the organ itself doesn’t feel any pain.”

“It doesn’t?”

“Nope,” Jisung pops the p, sounding more amused by the second. “That’s because it doesn’t have any pain receptors, so if you poked your own brain, it wouldn’t hurt. It’s the reason why neurosurgeons can operate on people while they’re awake.”

Something that will never cease to impress Minho is how much Jisung knows of everything. One day he will watch a documentary about lizards, and the next day he will be yapping about their shedding tendencies and what kinds of bugs they prefer to eat. Jisung will gather every piece of information about the things he sees or enjoys in general, and he will explain them with the enthusiasm of an expert in the field.

Something that makes Minho’s heart skip a beat every single time.

“That’s incredibly interesting, Jisungie,” Minho ends up saying, and he realizes there’s not a single tense muscle in his body anymore.

“Right?” Jisung answers as he bounces a bit on his seat, now retreating his resting hand to hold his seatbelt with both hands. “I learned it on a reddit post I saw the other day, and I just got into a wormhole about the brain. Did you know there is something called mirror neurons?”

Minho spends the bit they have left of the trip listening to Jisung yap about the mysteries of the brain. He talks about gestures being mirrored thanks to those neurons, and about why memories are sometimes linked to smells. He speaks of the diagrams Ramón y Cajal drew of the net of neurons we have on the cortex, in such detail that it feels like Jisung studied medicine instead.

And, bit by bit, traffic starts to loosen up, but Minho doesn’t realize. He doesn’t even feel the moment he stopped caring about it, because he’s too busy listening to Jisung speak about temporal lobectomies and anterograde amnesia.

They finally arrive to the camping site and Minho doesn’t even process it, because he’s too busy thinking Jisung might be the love of his life.

Grilled meat has always been the best. The best combination is beef and pork, for sure, a fact that Jisung agrees with wholeheartedly.

That’s the reason why Minho is working his ass off to light the barbecue as Jisung is inside the tent getting it ready for later, inflating the air mattress and putting on the sheets Minho brought with them. Minho could have just brought his sleeping bags, but he’s not about to lose his virginity or make Jisung lose his on the uncomfortable floor in the middle of the woods. He’d rather have Jisung feel as cozy as possible.

It’s taking forever to start the fire, because Minho is still on it when Jisung gets out with a satisfied smile, proclaiming that it’s the best tent interior Minho will ever see.

“I’m sure it will be,” Minho answers, and finally a smile appears on his face as the fire catches.

“Do you need any help here?” Jisung now questions as he approaches where Minho is standing, rummaging through the cooler and grabbing a bottle of water.

“You can give the vegetables a wash in the bucket over there,” Minho says, pointing at the potable water source every plot has. “And then leave them here on the table.”

Minho places the first cuts of meat on the grill as Jisung washes everything thoroughly, and once again Minho’s chest swims through domestic bliss. They’ve cooked together plenty of times – more like Minho doing the actual cooking and Jisung helping in whatever way he can – but seeing them doing this on their own, alone in the middle of a forest, does something to him.

“Do you want me to cut them?” Jisung asks as he leaves them just beside the small cutting table, already rummaging through Minho’s tools for a knife.

“Only if you promise you won’t hurt yourself.”

“Hyung!” Jisung pouts. “You know I can do this just fine.”

“Alright, you baby,” Minho says as he huffs endearingly, because Jisung is just so cute. “Cut them in big pieces, okay?”

Nodding profusely, Jisung gets to it and, in no time, Minho is grilling peppers and onions as well.

Cooking everything goes by pretty quickly. There’s not that much meat to prepare for just the two of them, and the vegetables are ready in no time. Jisung makes sure the table is set even with the homemade kimchi Minho brought on a tupperware, while Minho finishes up and plates everything.

The first bite Jisung takes, he makes such a delighted sound it makes Minho chuckle.

“Don’t laugh, hyung!” Jisung says, cheeks full of food. “It’s delicious, you can’t blame me!”

Smiling, Minho shakes his head.

“I’m not saying anything, jagi. I’m just happy you like it.”

Minho takes a bite of the pork belly, and hums in happiness too. It truly is delicious.

“I wish we had rice, though,” Minho adds, and Jisung completely agrees.

Lunch goes by in a breeze. The more bites Minho takes, the more he realizes he was starving, to the point everything is finished in less than half an hour in between comfortable silence and amazing conversation. Minho makes the move to wrap everything up and throw away their single-use plates, but Jisung threatens to pout if he doesn’t let him clean up, so Minho gives up.

He knows he would fold for that pout anyway.

Tired from the driving and the cooking, Minho makes himself comfortable inside the tent. He expected things to be kept simple inside, but the surprise he feels as he sees the decoration inside is immense.

The bed perfectly made, even with a throw blanket on top. Jisung has placed a small lamp on one of his tables, and string lights all across the ceiling of the tent. They’re unlit for now, but it still takes his breath away.

It looks so cozy. So… at home.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?”

Minho startles when Jisung speaks just behind him, giving him an apologetic smile when Minho squints his eyes at him.

“Sorry,” Jisung continues as he pecks Minho’s cheek, moving further inside. “But it looks great, doesn’t it? I thought that it would be cute to bring a few lights and a blanket with me.”

 “It really does look cute,” Minho says, because he’s not sure what else he can say. Maybe saying "you’re amazing" and "thank you for making everything better" is a bit too much right now.

Jisung plops on the air mattress, grabbing his laptop and patting the spot just beside him.

“Join me?”

Minho doesn’t think twice before lying down beside him, but Jisung shifts him around until he's leaning against the pillows and Minho is nestled against his chest.

“Want to watch a movie?”

Jisung grabs the blanket and covers them both with it, and Minho feels so comfortable in his arms that he feels his brain slow down, to the point words feel too heavy in his mouth. He can only nod yes.

“Alright, jagi,” Jisung says as he props his laptop on Minho’s lap, caressing his hair as it loads up. “Do you have anything in mind?”

This time Minho shakes his head, mainly because his mind is getting fuzzier and fuzzier, but also because he knows Jisung is dying to re-watch Howl’s Moving Castle.

Feeling a soft peck on top of his head, Minho cuddles further into Jisung’s embrace, to the point he doesn’t get to hear Jisung’s words, or the opening notes of the movie. All he feels is warmth, love, and sleep slowly pulling him under.

When Minho wakes up, the tent is only illuminated by the soft lamp beside them. At some point during his nap, Jisung must have moved them – the laptop is nowhere to be seen, and he’s lying down on the bed instead of against his boyfriend’s chest, who is curled up against him instead, snoring softly.

Still, something feels odd. It shouldn’t be this dark, because Minho is pretty sure they didn’t sleep that much. It shouldn’t feel this cold either, because it's almost summer, but then Minho hears it.

The soft patter of droplets against the roof of the tent.

It’s raining.

The frown on Minho’s face deepens. Driving here was as sunny as a summer day, even if there was a cloud here and there. But the noise of the rain against the nylon is unmistakable, one that is starting to get louder and louder.

Minho’s personal spiral of doom must have awakened Jisung, because he feels movement against his chest, and a sleepy face appears on his field of vision.

“Did you sleep well?” Jisung asks with the cutest sleepy voice, and Minho almost forgets he’s upset.

With a small smile, Minho pecks Jisung on the lips and nods. “Yeah, I slept amazing.”

Still, because Jisung knows him as well as he knows himself, his expression fades into a frown.

“What’s wrong?”

Minho sighs. “It’s raining.”

Jisung’s frown deepens, until his eyes open up like saucers.

“Oh.”

Now both moving to sit, Jisung gets up from under the blanket and moves to open up the tent door, petrichor hitting Minho’s nostrils as if it was a bad joke.

“It really is raining.”

Sighing, Minho gets up from the bed and moves to stand beside Jisung.

“Yeah, it wasn’t even supposed to rain, but now it’s pouring so much. I don’t even know where all those clouds came from.”

“And what do we do now?”

Minho doesn’t answer, because he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know or understand why nothing is going the way he wanted, when none of this was supposed to happen. They were supposed to go on a small hike, and enjoy a nice meal afterward. They were supposed to watch something at noon, and then Minho would take Jisung fishing so they could have a proper dinner before dark.

“I just…” Minho ends up answering, almost as a whisper. “We were supposed to go fishing…”

The sentence must have come out like a whine, because Jisung places himself in front of him, grabbing his hands.

“Hyungie,” Jisung starts with a voice as sweet as honey, and it makes Minho’s posture relax a bit. “It’s okay if we can’t go fishing.”

Minho’s eyebrows furrow as he’s about to protest, but Jisung shakes his head.

“No, Minho, really,” he continues, squeezing Minho’s hands. “It doesn’t matter what we do here, jagi. I’m just happy to be here with you.”

Minho feels his face soften at the words, a corner of his lips lifting up.

“Really?”

“Of course!” Jisung exclaims, pulling Minho closer. “Like yes, it would have been really cool to go fishing, and I’m not gonna lie, I was looking forward to it.”

Before Minho can say anything, Jisung raises one finger to stop him.

“But – we have all the time in the world, don’t we? We can always come back to fish, and hike, and grill some lamb skewers instead of beef. We have our whole lives, hyungie.”

Minho opens his eyes, speechless, feeling his heart beat faster. It’s true that Minho has thought many times about their future, but he has to admit he was a bit afraid it would be something that wouldn’t be able to last. But Jisung’s words, and the reassurance that he wants this as much as Minho does completely wipe away any doubt he might have had about it.

Still, because Jisung is better at words than Minho is, all he can do is nod and pull Jisung into a hug.

“We won’t have fish for dinner, though,” Minho still says, because he’s stubborn like that.

Jisung laughs against his neck, tightening the embrace.

“So what? Ramen is a perfectly fine meal.”

Sighing one last time, Minho pulls back from the hug to look at Jisung.

“Alright, but I will take you here again to fish soon, alright? To do anything you want, as many times as you want.”

“You promise?”

Minho smiles. “I promise.”

Since the rain is still getting in the way of Minho's plans, Jisung pulls him back into bed and suggests a different way to spend the afternoon. It's still a bit early for dinner, so they decide to finish the movie Jisung paused as soon as he noticed Minho had drifted off.

Cuddling just like before but with Jisung in Minho’s arms instead, they spend the rest of their time watching movies and getting distracted by kisses.

At some point, while their second movie is forgotten in the back and Jisung is being kissed senseless in Minho’s lap, Jisung’s belly rumbles, finally opting for having dinner.

This time, Jisung takes over the cooking, emptying two packets of their favorite ramen into a pot of boiling water beneath the tent's awning. That way, they can stay out of the rain without having to cook inside the tent and risk filling it with fumes.

With his belly full and mind way calmer, Minho cleans everything up, ordering Jisung to just go inside and wait for him there. He finds him on the bed a few minutes later, chatting on the phone with a mischievous smirk.

“Watcha doing?” Minho asks as he finally lays down, Jisung urging him to place his head on his lap.

“Chan was asking how we’re doing,” Jisung answers, his free hand immediately finding Minho’s hair and his other tilting his phone so Minho can see. “Told us to stay safe because of the rain.”

Minho snorts as he reads the messages, but immediately blushes at the next one Jisung receives.

Chan-hyung [10:32pm]:

and don’t forget to use protection!

stay safe and call us in the morning

“Oh my god.” Minho rubs his face, pulling the phone away. “He’s so embarrassing.”

“What is it?” Jisung asks, still clueless about the messages.

Without a word, Minho turns the phone toward him.

Jisung reads the latest texts and immediately covers his face. “Oh my god. I’m going to kill him.”

Giggling, Minho nestles against Jisung's middle, while Jisung keeps caressing his hair.

“God, does everyone think that we came here just to have sex?”

“Hm,” Minho hums, tracing mindless patterns on his stomach. “Don’t mind them, they’re too horny for their own good. And so jealous, too.”

Jisung snorts, slapping Minho’s shoulder.

“You’re so mean, hyung.”

Minho keeps silent as Jisung finishes texting on his phone, gathering all the courage he can muster to ask the next question.

“Would that be something you’d like?”

Minho hears Jisung set his phone down on the bed, but he doesn't dare look at him. Jisung, however, seems determined to make him squirm. He gently turns Minho's face toward him until they're looking at each other.

“Would you like that?”

Pouting, Minho sits down so he can look properly at Jisung.

“I asked first.”

Jisung smiles, shaking his head.

“Minho, I –“ He lets out an airy laugh. “Of course I want that. It’s been driving me crazy that we haven’t had a single moment of privacy back at home.”

“Well,” Minho shrugs, still feeling too shy to hold Jisung’s gaze. “Maybe it crossed my mind when I planned this trip. You know, having some privacy for once and… maybe, if it felt right, taking things a little further.”

Once more, Jisung cups Minho’s face so their gazes can find each other again.

“And is that something you would like to do tonight? With me?”

The vulnerability Jisung asks it with takes away any shyness he has left.

“Of course I want to, Jisungie,” Minho answers as he places his hand on top of Jisung’s, caressing it softly. “I want to have all of you.”

Jisung is closing the distance a second later, kissing Minho as he puts his free hand on Minho’s chest. The contact is sweet and careful, but it has a heaviness that has been growing more and more between them lately. A hunger that Minho reciprocates, because he needs Jisung like air to his lungs.

Minho moves to straddle Jisung where he’s sitting on the bed, hands moving to Jisung’s neck to deepen the kiss. Jisung's own travel down to Minho’s waist, circling around it so he can pull him closer.

They kiss unhurriedly, just the two of them in their own world. It’s a dance of tongues and spit and things Minho only dreamed of years ago, when they were nothing but two guys crushing on each other. A press of lips that Minho will never take for granted.

Minho can feel Jisung’s cock hardening under his ass the messier the kiss gets, and he knows his own boxers are starting to dampen in response. As he threads his fingers through Jisung’s hair, his boyfriend finally tugs on the seam of his t-shirt, and in no time Minho is breaking the kiss to take it off.

Jisung’s shirt is next, shed to reveal the beautiful softness hidden underneath. His honey skin looks beautiful under the lamp light, and Minho marvels at how goosebumps raise with his touch.

“You’re so pretty, Jisungie," he whispers. "So beautiful.”

“Hyung…” Jisung ducks his head a bit, taking his own time tracing Minho’s soft belly and the scar there. “You are too, Minho. The most beautiful of them all.”

Minho feels the tips of his ears burning, and closes the distance to kiss him again. Their chests are touching and by now Minho would have started rutting his hardening length against Jisung’s stomach, but tonight is not about that.

Tonight is about finally becoming one.

Breaking the kiss, a breathless Jisung moves his hands to the hem of Minho’s jeans, doe eyes shining.

“Take them off?”

As if Minho had the power to say no to him, he moves out of Jisung’s lap to take his pants off. He then goes to help an eager Jisung out of his own, until they’re sporting nothing but their boxers and their very obvious boners.

Trying not to crumble, Minho squeezes Jisung’s hip as they kneel in front of each other. He looks so cute looking at Minho like that, with sparkling eyes and a blush that reaches his chest.

Minho, unfortunately, is not faring any better.

“How do you want to do this?”

The question has been sitting in Minho’s mind for a long while, now. From what they’ve talked about during the past weeks, they both know they would be okay with it in any kind of way. Maybe Jisung topping him is the better option, Minho thinks, since he doesn’t have much experience fingering himself nor has taken a dildo like Minho has.

Minho is about to suggest Jisung does such thing, but Jisung is quicker to answer.

“Well, I – uh…” Jisung gulps, and he looks away for a second, looking embarrassed. “I’ve been, uhm, practicing.”

Minho moves closer, almost bracketing Jisung’s thighs with his own.

“Practicing what?”

Blushing, Jisung toys with the hem of his boxers. “F- Fingering myself.”

And alright, maybe Minho shouldn’t be so affected by that. He shouldn’t feel a chill run down his spine, because he’s dying to have Jisung inside himself. But there’s something about how shy Jisung looks about it, about the fact that he put the effort to do so and admitting it in front of him.

Minho could eat him whole.

“It’s not like I got much better at it,” Jisung continues, because it seems he wants to see Minho die tonight. “But I just really want to feel you inside me for our first time, hyung.”

Minho is positive he’s red all over. He knows his eyes are sparkling and his hands are trembling with his words, because this cannot be real. Jisung is unreal.

“Shit…” is the only thing Minho manages, and it makes Jisung giggle, the tension dissipating a bit. Minho follows him in the laughter.

“Jesus, Jisung,” Minho continues as he places his hands on Jisung’s thighs and squeezes, grounding himself. “I’m going to die before we even do anything, you can’t say stuff like that!”

“Why not?” Jisung pouts, and Minho melts. “It’s true! I’ve been trying my best, hyung. I really want to try it.”

Letting out an endeared sigh, Minho pecks Jisung on the lips.

“Of course we can try it, Jisungie, let me grab some stuff.”

Minho would like to think he doesn’t get up from the bed with wobbly legs, running at the speed of light to his overnight bag to grab the lube and a condom with trembling hands. But then he would be lying to himself, because the anticipation and the nerves are starting to get to him.

They’re finally doing this.

Before getting on the bed, Minho takes off his boxers, and Jisung’s eyes once again open up as wide as the moon hiding in the night sky. Minho cannot help the small laugh as Jisung visibly gulps, taking in the sight.

“I don’t think I’m ever going to get used to how beautiful you are, hyung.”

This time it’s turn for Minho’s eyes to widen, caught off guard by Jisung’s sweet words.

“And seeing all of you like this,” Jisung keeps going, his voice softening more and more. “I just feel so lucky it’s you here now with me.”

Minho feels his eyes sting, because of course Jisung’s words are always full of love. Everything about him is, from his smile to his Adam’s apple to the inside of his chest, and Minho has been the luckiest person to be at the receiving end.

Dropping the bottle and the foil packet beside him on the bed, Minho places a hand on Jisung’s chest until he’s laying down and Minho hovers over him.

And because Minho isn’t so big with words, he shows him with acts instead.

He kisses Jisung like he means it, Jisung whimpering in response against his lips. He caresses his waist and his chest with the softness of the clouds outside, until he’s sure Jisung is utterly smothered by his loving touch. When their lips part, he whispers "I love you, Jisung," because those are the truest words he’ll ever know. "I love you too, Minho-hyung" is whispered back against his mouth, the same words that are engraved in his heart.

He might be nervous, but if there is one thing he's sure of, it's that he wants Jisung with his whole being.

With Jisung’s permission, Minho takes off his boyfriend's boxers, finally laying bare against each other. Jisung takes the opportunity to explore the expanse of Minho’s skin as he does the same, mapping for the first time bodies that will be soon engraved in each other’s minds.

Minho rapidly finds out that Jisung is a bit more sensitive around his nipple area, while Jisung immediately finds out how much Minho likes his hair being touched. It’s not like it’s a secret, but the moment Jisung reluctantly tugs as they kiss, Minho discovers something new about himself through the moan he lets out.

“Do you want me to do it?” Minho asks when Jisung’s sounds are starting to get a little bit needier, reaching for the lube. “Or would you prefer to do it yourself?”

Jisung eyes the bottle and thinks for a second, finally pushing the lube towards Minho.

“You can do it,” his boyfriend says, a soft smile on his face. “I trust you.”

Minho smiles back, and finally opens up the cap to pour enough on his fingers. He warms it up at the same time he caresses Jisung’s thigh, because he knows it’s uncomfortable to finger himself when it’s cold.

“How do you want to do it?”

Humming, Jisung looks around as if imagining himself in different positions, ultimately slumping down still facing Minho.

“I’ve been doing it facing down so I can reach deeper,” Jisung admits looking at anywhere but Minho’s eyes. “But I want to see you. Want to look at you the entire time.”

Minho smiles and grabs one of the pillows to place it under Jisung’s ass, then guides his legs to fold against his chest so he gets better access.

“Alright then, jagi,” Minho says as he closes the distance once again, hovering mere centimeters against Jisung’s face. “Promise me you’ll let me know if it hurts, okay?”

“I promise.”

With determination written in Jisung’s face, Minho finally presses one of his fingers against Jisung’s hole. The younger one clenches against nothing at the first touch, and Minho caresses where he’s holding one of Jisung’s thighs.

“Relax, Jisungie, let yourself go.”

Jisung nods and takes a deep breath, and Minho is finally able to breach his entrance. The pained whimper Jisung lets out stops Minho on his tracks, but Jisung quickly assures him that it’s okay, that he just needs to get used to it.

Slowly, Minho pushes all the way inside until the last knuckle, and feels Jisung clench hard against it.

“Are you okay?”

Jisung nods again but still grimaces a bit, breathing deeply.

“Yeah, it’s just… weird.”

“Bad weird?”

Huffing out a small laugh, Jisung shakes his head.

“No, not at all, no. It’s just a bit too much at the beginning.”

“Maybe I can try and suck you off? Or even just touch you until it gets better.”

Jisung whimpers at the words, his face relaxing a little bit more.

“I’d love that, jagi, but I think I wouldn’t be able to last if you touch my dick now. Maybe another time?”

Minho nods and kisses his lips instead, caressing Jisung’s hair as softly as he can. He starts moving his finger in and out when Jisung is not clenching anymore and, slowly, Jisung’s discomfort turns into a pleased expression, his breathing getting heavier in pleasure instead.

“T-That feels good,” Jisung mumbles as Minho goes a bit faster with his finger, still not able to reach where he knows Jisung will feel really good.

“Yeah, baby? Is it better now?”

Nodding, Jisung cranes his neck to peck Minho’s lips.

“I think you can try adding another.”

Retreating his finger to add a second one, this time Jisung moans at the stretch instead.

“A- Alright, that feels so much better now.”

Encouraged by the words, Minho tries to go deeper with them, slowly loosening up the tight muscle. Jisung threads his fingers through Minho’s hair as he scissors his fingers to make way for a third one – a soft caress that turns into a hard tug when Minho bends his fingers.

“Shit!” Jisung’s back arches off the bed when Minho touches his prostate for the first time, and the sound Jisung makes rewires the entirety of his brain. “What the hell was that?”

Giggling, this time Minho finally adds a third finger before he brushes the bundle of nerves again, effectively drawing another moan out of Jisung’s mouth.

“That’s your prostate, jagi. You haven’t been able to touch it?”

“N-No,” Jisung answers, almost breathless. “I never reach so deep with my fingers, they’re too short.”

Minho keeps at it, loving how Jisung melts under him, pressing occasional kisses to the mole on his cheek.

“Glad to be of service, then.”

“It’s amazing, but –“ Jisung says, and Minho sees he’s starting to tremble. “If you continue, I’ll come, hyung. I think I’m ready.”

Minho slows down his movements to a stop, taking out his fingers with the utmost care not to hurt Jisung. The squelching sound the motion does makes him blush, because holy shit. He just fingered Jisung, almost to completion.

Cleaning his hand on his discarded t-shirt, he moves to grab the condom and open the foil. He looks at it as he completely forgets everything about how to put it on but, as he’s about to try his luck, Jisung sits forward and offers a hand.

“Can I?”

Ears on fire, Minho nods and hands the condom to Jisung, who doesn't seem any less flustered.

Kneeling in front of him, Jisung handles it with slightly trembling hands, and Minho knows he’s as nervous as he is.

“Are you nervous?” Minho asks anyway, because he needs the reassurance he’s not alone in this feeling.

Jisung lets out a little laugh, ducking his face. “God, yeah. I’m so nervous, hyung.”

Minho reaches to cup Jisung’s face from where he’s hiding from him.

“I am too, jagi, but it’s just me. It’s us, together, but we can stop here if you don’t feel ready.”

Shaking his head, Jisung finally looks at him.

“No, no. It’s just… I’ve thought about this moment so many times and… it just feels insane that it’s finally here. That I finally get to have you.”

Minho's heart skips a beat, and the only thing he is able to do is swallow his overwhelming feelings. Jisung brings his knees closer, and lets out a deep breath.

“Let me try again.”

This time, Jisung’s hands are steadier when they touch him. It makes him gasp when Jisung starts rolling the latex down his dick until it’s snug at the base, and Minho feels about to explode.

Lying down once again, Jisung takes Minho's hand and gently pulls him on top of him, wrapping his legs around his waist. Minho braces himself on either side of Jisung's head, meeting the gaze of those beautiful eyes that have looked back at him for years.

Jisung cups his face to press a soft kiss on his lips, and then he gifts him one of his beautiful smiles.

“I’m ready, hyung.”

Unable to voice out a single word, Minho nods and reaches one hand to guide his length against Jisung’s hole. Minho has to take a deep breath before he pushes forward and, the moment the tip finally goes in, they both moan at the same time.

The feeling is driving Minho insane. It’s nothing like his own hand, Jisung being a thousand times tighter and warmer. It feels like he’s actually sucking Minho inside, Jisung gasping in pleasure at the movement until Minho bottoms out.

Neither of them budges once Minho’s hips are flush against Jisung’s ass, Minho panting against Jisung’s neck and Jisung holding onto Minho’s shoulders for dear life.

“Oh my god,” Jisung gasps at the minimum shift of Minho’s hips, squeezing him into his embrace. “I feel you everywhere, hyung, holy fuck.”

“J- Jisungie,” Minho mumbles back, still not able to do much more than stand still because he’s on the verge of release. “You really can’t say stuff like this, or else this will be over very quickly.”

Letting out a soft laugh, Jisung relaxes his hold and caresses Minho’s already sweaty hair out of his face.

“So what? It already feels so good, hyung. This is the best I’ve ever felt.”

“Psh,” Minho smirks, too endeared by his boyfriend. “I haven’t even moved, jagi. I still want to make you feel better than this.”

“You can move then, hyung.”

Taking a deep breath and hoping for the best, Minho moves his hips to thrust right back in. It’s too careful at first, the angle too awkward and the speed is off. Jisung tries his best to match the pace but they’re off sync, the way Minho is holding himself not really leaving much room to adjust.

“Let me just –”

Grabbing both of Jisung’s legs drawing them up a little higher gives Minho more leverage. The angle works much better, and it allows him to go faster and steadier, making it easier for them to move together instead of fighting to find a rhythm.

Quickly, Jisung’s quietness gives way to the same soft sounds he'd made minutes earlier, and they only spur Minho further.

“That feels so good, hyung,” Jisung whines after a particularly hard thrust, hands moving from Minho’s back to his arms. “K-Keep going, please.”

Grabbing Jisung’s hands and interlacing their fingers instead, Minho leans down to kiss him. The friction is making his lower abdomen rapidly grow heavier and heavier and, with the new angle, he finally gets to brush Jisung’s prostate, eliciting a moan that breaks the kiss.

“D-Does it feel good, jagi?” Minho asks against Jisung’s lips as he tries to quicken his pace, his legs and lower back already burning from the effort.

“Y-Yes, hyung, right there, please! I- I’m so close –”

Minho feels how Jisung is trembling under him again, a sight so intoxicating it pulls Minho dangerously close to the edge.

“Me too, J-Jisungie, you feel so good…”

“M-Minho!”

Wanting to make Jisung feel the best he can, Minho releases one of his hands to touch Jisung’s cock, and it only takes a couple of strokes for Jisung to finally spill against his hand and stomach. The moan of his name falling from his boyfriend's lips and the way he clenches down are enough to push Minho over the edge, his orgasm hitting him like a truck as he spills inside the condom.

Panting like they’ve run a marathon, it takes a while for their ragged breaths to calm down, both of them too shocked to even move.

“Oh my god,” Minho folds first, still trying to catch his breath against Jisung’s chest. “I can’t believe that just happened.”

Jisung lets out a laugh, pushing his sweaty hair out of his face. “Yeah, me neither, oh my god. Was it as good for you as it was for me?”

Minho has to laugh too, because good doesn’t begin to describe it. Maybe it was a bit awkward at first, and he definitely knows he can do better next time. But the feeling of reaching his high together with Jisung will never be topped by anything else.

“'Good' cuts it a bit too short, jagi,” Minho mumbles with a kiss, one that makes Jisung smile. “It was amazing.”

Not wanting to keep putting his weight on top of an exhausted Jisung, he pulls out as slow as he can, apologizing when Jisung hisses in oversensitivity.

“Sorry, Jisungie.” Minho pecks him on the cheek, taking the condom off and trying his best to tie it up so nothing comes out of it. He wraps it on a piece of paper and tosses it in their bin, now going to his overnight bag to grab the wipes he brought.

“Aww, you don’t have to,” Jisung pouts as Minho comes back and starts cleaning his belly, but he doesn’t make a move to stop him. “I know you’re tired, too.”

Minho shrugs, already finishing with cleaning himself too.

“That doesn’t mean I don’t want to take care of you.”

“Well,” Jisung says, now getting up from the bed with wobbly legs, even though Minho tries to stop him. “I want to do that too.”

As much as he wants to complain that Jisung shouldn’t be moving around with such flimsy legs, Minho still looks terribly endeared at how he grabs both of their pajamas before coming back to the bed.

“Thank you, jagi,” Minho says as he accepts his clothes, but it’s only then that he realizes Jisung is actually trying to dress him up.

And, because Minho’s heart is melting off his ears, he gladly accepts the help of his stubborn boyfriend.

After dressing each other in the comfort of the bed, Minho finally drags Jisung under the covers to cuddle him as close as he can.

“Hello, beautiful.”

Giggling, Jisung makes himself comfortable in Minho’s arms, lifting one hand to follow the slope of Minho’s nose with his finger. “Hello there, handsome.”

Minho tightens his embrace. “So… that happened.”

Jisung’s cheek bunches up where it lays against Minho’s chest. “It really did.”

“I can’t believe we got to do this together. It feels like…”

“A gift?” Jisung tries, and Minho can do nothing else but smile.

“I was going to say more like a dream, but yeah. Being here with you… being here with you truly feels like a gift, Jisung-ah.”

Minho didn’t pretend for it to sound so vulnerable, but having Jisung in his arms after making love to him is making his chest feel a thousand things a second.

“And I’m so glad it was you,” Minho continues, voice as soft as a whisper. “Because it could have been nobody else for me. There’s only you.”

"You’re it for me", Minho wants to say. "I think you’re the love of my life", Minho wants to add, but he sees a tear down Jisung’s face and he immediately moves his hand to dry it instead.

“Jisungie…”

“I’m okay, hyung, I’m just…” Jisung gulps, but he doesn’t look sad. He looks like Minho is his everything. “Today was so perfect, all of it. Even if we didn’t get to go on the hike, even if you couldn’t teach me how to fish. It was perfect because it was with you, and because there could never be anyone else for me either, Minho.”

Minho hopes the way he kisses Jisung gathers every single emotion he feels for him. He hopes it conveys how much he loves him, how safe he makes him feel. He hopes it explains how Minho has never felt more blessed than to have Jisung along with him for all of this, the concerts and the albums and everything in between. He hopes it shows how lucky Minho feels to have Jisung by his side.

“I’m so glad you still enjoyed it then, jagi.”

Jisung snickers, moving a bit higher up so he’s facing Minho’s face instead, and slapping his arm in the process.

“Of course I did, hyung. So much I’m afraid we’ll have to do it again tomorrow morning.”

Minho snorts, but he knows he wants it too.

“There was something else I wanted to do,” Minho mentions in between the silence that has set between them, only disturbed by the rain still falling outside. “But it will have to wait for another time, too.”

“What is it?” Jisung asks, eyes filled with endless curiosity.

“I really wanted to stargaze with you,” Minho answers, trying not to pout. “The stars look very pretty here.”

Jisung gives him a lopsided smile, and the curiosity in his gaze mixes with unadulterated love.

“That would have been so great, hyung.”

Minho cannot help the sigh, because he really wanted to show them to Jisung.

“Yeah, I know.”

“Actually,” Jisung says, now sitting on the bed, looking down at Minho. “I forgot to show you something, too. Why don’t you close your eyes?”

Doing as he’s told, Minho closes his eyes when Jisung gets up from the bed. He hears him shuffle around inside the tent, clicking some things and flickering others. In no time he is back on the bed cuddling him again, but he doesn’t dare open up his eyes just yet.

“I know it’s nowhere near the same, but hopefully it makes up for it a bit? And if it bothers us… anyways, you can open up your eyes now, hyung.”

When Minho gets a look at what’s in front of him, his heart skips a beat. The string lights that he saw earlier are all light up now, dim enough that Minho immediately feels coziness creep up. They’re arranged through the ceiling so they go across each other and… oh.

It looks like a starry sky.

“Oh, Jisung-ah…”

Even if the sight is beautiful, Minho cannot help but look at Jisung, who is looking back at him. His hair is still ruffled, and his cheeks are still a bit flushed, but now his eyes have tiny sparks of light reflected in them, making it the most gorgeous Minho has seen Jisung look.

“Do you like it?”

Letting out an airy laugh, Minho squeezes him until Jisung whines.

“Hyung!”

“I love it, Jisung, the stars look so pretty,” he answers. “I love you.”

“I love you too, hyung,” Jisung says back, nothing but adoration written in his face. “I’m glad you do.”

Minho doesn’t know if Jisung means he’s glad Minho likes the lights, or that he’s glad Minho loves him back, but there’s no need to ask. It’s not necessary because, the way Jisung closes his eyes and cuddles him further, tells Minho everything he needs to know.

That there’s nothing that makes him happier than to know that they love each other just the same.

“Sleepy?” Minho asks as he sees Jisung’s eyes getting heavier, even if he’s trying his best to stay awake.

“Hm yeah,” Jisung mumbles, his voice now a bit deeper than usual. “I just feel so cozy here.”

“Then go to sleep, jagi. We still have to go hiking tomorrow morning, if it’s not raining.”

Jisung laughs softly as he gives Minho’s lips a small kiss.

“That sounds amazing. Good night, hyung.”

“Good night, Jisungie,” Minho says back, pressing a small peck on Jisung’s forehead.

Sleep finds Jisung in no time, snoring softly where he’s cuddled against him. It takes a bit longer for Minho to fall asleep, because he doesn’t want to stop looking at the biggest gift bestowed upon him.

At who he knows is the love of his life.

But, in between the lull of the soft lights and the rain patting the roof of the tent, Minho falls asleep feeling the comfort of a shared life with the person in his arms.