Chapter Text
society of the dumbasses
10:42 AM
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: i dont like thsi.....
i wanna go home💔💔💔💔
picasso_gone_mad: its not that bad
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: yes it it painty!!!!
we have NO classes together AND i dont know ANYONE in my classes
picasso_gone_mad: would it really be that bad to spend just two hours with your homeroom class?
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: UES.
kudos-to-fanblr: I HAVENT FINISHED UPDATING MY BLOG AND WERE ALREADY BEING EDCORTED TO THE AUDITORUIM
blasting two trucks: i am so surviving this program🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️
i brought my earpods
kudos-to-fanblr: LUCKYY
i forgot my headphones at home im sk cooked
baseoh: nickel just called someone 13 slurs in the hall for mentioning a character he hates
he now has lunch detention.
lurnehaotoocspel: WHAT ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO FUCKING DO????
baseoh: NOT CALL PEOPLE SLURS???
academically dull: cmon baseball
we all know that he says atleast five slurs a day
how is he not going to call someone a damn slur??
digital hallucinations: honestly im not even slightly surprised that he got another lunch detention
kudos-to-fanblr: suitcase.
is.
is that a tadc ref.
jax mentioned
lurnehaotoocspel: THATS FUCKING IT
WHERE IS HE
WHERE IS FAN
gayass no. 2: he should be in the bleachers,why?
🧪🧬remaining braincell⚛️⚗️: fan.
i suggest you start running.
marshy!!: i just woke up
what the hell is going on??
its only 10 am for fucks sake
gayass no. 2: i backread, so apparently nickel’s hunting down fan for mentioning…
im not saying his name
i do not want to be next on someone’s hitlist
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: cna we go jome noe…..
picasso_gone_mad: lightbulb.
we havent even started yet
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: LET US FREE💔💔💔💔💔🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
baseoh: HOLY FUCK NICKEL
GET OFF THE DAMN RAILING
blasting two trucks: THERES NO WAY HES GOING TO JUMP OFF THE RAILING TK REACH FAN
FANS LIKE 10 FEET BELOW HIM.
🎀cunt!3st b!t©h🎀: id like to see him try and survive the fall damage
that isnt even the funniest part
i just know he’ll be screaming and crying his bitchass off when he gets his joints relocated
it happened to apple once and she was acting like a crybaby
illiterate: i knwo! i was there!!
what does relocated mean
🎀cunt!3st b!t©h🎀: this is why your username is “illiterate” ♥️
illiterate: what
what does that mean
🎀cunt!3st b!t©h🎀: @burntsugar can we get kumquat a tutor and a dictionary for her birthday gift??
picasso_gone_mad: HOLY SHIT FAN WATCH OUT HES JUMPING
blasting two trucks: recording all this for fans blog
digital hallucinations: @fatass🤯🤯 why does nickel even hate j** in the first place?
baseoh: the origin story?
basically nickel has this reputation for his slurs
and then some people started to compare him to j** and anonymously send him reels 24/7
thats pretty much it
digital hallucinations: oh
i guess i better change my username before im next
picl: THEYRE CHASING EACHOTHER LIKE CAT AND MOUSE HOLY SHIT
WHERE ARE THE TESCHERS WHEN YOU NEED THEM???
🧹sweepsweepmf🧹:theyre probably on lunch already
blasting two trucks: WHAT THE FUCK???
THE ORIENTATION HASNT EVEN STARTED YET AND THEYRE ALREADY ON LUNCH????
kudos-to-fanblr: MIC GET BACK TO RECORDING
blasting two trucks: YESSIR
baseoh: I THINK SOMEONE CALLED THE TEACHERS
picasso_gone_mad: wait how the fuck is @ao3_at_25:00 even online ksnt he getting chased right now
kudos-to-fanblr: i got a notif thag my fic updated so now im just hiding out
digital hallucinations: where exactly????
kudos-to-fanblr: in the vents above the auditorium
its easy to get inside if youve done it multiple times
lurnehaotocspel: FOUND YOU BITCH
kudos-to-fanblr: FUCK
baseoh: suitcase
did nickel tell you to do that
digital hallucinations: he said he’d excuse my username if i did!!
i have no choice okay i have no username ideas
picasso_gone_mad: FAN JUST FELL OUT OF THE FUCKING VENTS???????
digital hallucinations: @physicallysharp remind me to buy fan 10k paid crystals later when we play pjsk at lunch later
academically dull: pretty sure that your guilt will be reminding you instead but sure
digital hallucinations: shh
don't remind me of that
🧪🧬remaining braincell⚛️⚗️: @AO3_at_25:00
@AO3_at_25:00
@AO3_at_25:00
FAN???
ARE YOU ALRIGHT???
picasso_gone_mad: does it look like he's okay??
he constantly sleeps past 12 and was just hunted down to the point he had to hide in a vent only for that vent to break and land on someone
picl: HE LANDED ON SOMENONE??????
gayass no.1: I can never get a break from the dumb shit this gc constantly produces
gayass no.2: don't worry oj, me too
🎀cunt!3st b!t©h🎀: looks like some of us are living up to our usernames!!
gayass no.1: as much as i want to strangle you right now bow, i cant really lie about my username being wrong
🎀cunt!3st b!t©h🎀: thats the spirit!!♥️
all of us are pretty much a gayass at heart anyways
but you and paper are the biggest gayasses here
thats for sure!!♥️
gayass no.2: excuse me???
picl: WAIT WERE GETTING TOO OFF TOPIC HERE WHO DID HE LAND ON??/?
blasting two trucks: wait im the most closes tto him lemme check
he landed on nickle.
no one else was hurt though
baseoh: HE LANDED ON WHO NOW?????
digital hallucinations: HELP IM CACKLING
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
academically dull: i know
i can hear you from across the auditorium
digital hallucinations: suht up
academically dull: i also know that definitely hurt to type that
digital hallucinations: it did💔💔
now everyone (except nickel and marshmallow who is late) is looking at me weird 💔💔
kudos-to-fanblr: @nerdalert🤓☝️ im fine!! just a few bruises here and there but thats alright
blasting two trucks: FAN HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU ALIVE??? THAT FALL WAS LIKE 20 FT TALL????
(yes i got the footage)
kudos-to-fanblr: honestly i dont know
something mustve broken my fall
(very good...ive trained you well)
(send them to me later)
blasting two trucks: oh right. nickel broke your fall
(yay validation)
(yessir)
kudos-to-fanblr: HOLDTHEEFUCKUP IM ONTOP OF WHO NOW/??????
🎀cunt!3st b!t©h🎀: wait you and nickel have been fucking??
AND FAN DOESNT EVEN KNOW HES THE TOP???
kudos-to-fanblr: NO???????
THATS NOT HTE CONTEXT HERE??????
🎀cunt!3st b!t©h🎀: oh
phew
i was about to lose my shit there
britishly🤝mexican: what happened here???
academically dull: how could you possibly miss more than 50+ messages???
blasting two trucks: oh hey tacos awake!!
she fell asleep listening to a bunch of musical soundtracks on repeat
anyways to recap most of what happened for the rest of the peeps who missed out and dont wanna backread: basically fan mentioned a character nickel hates so he went batshit insane and chased fan around the audtitorium untill fan hid out in the vents like an among us imposter and the vent broke and landed on nickel
the insane part is how NONE of the teachers are here to stop them and the damn student orientation hasnt started yet
fucking insane
picasso_gone_mad: we are so cooked this school year gang💔
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: WHY HASNT THE ORIENTATION STARTED YET
SOMEONE EXPLAIN RIGHT NOW
ITS ALREADY 11:40
WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING LKUCJH RGIIHT NEWO
THIS IS FCUKGIN BULLSHIT
picasso_gone_mad: holy shit lightbulb calm down
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: CALM DOWN????
BRO
I CANT EVEN DESCRIBE HOW MUCH I HATE IT HERE
CLASSES HASNT EVEN STARTED
picasso_gone_mad: okayyy..
oh right
that reminds me i brought some apollo chocolate in my bag
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: APOLLO CHOCOLATE????
CAN I HAVE SOME????
@error404:gender_not_found
@error404:gender_not_found
@error404:gender_not_found
@error404:gender_not_found
@error404:gender_not_found
picasso_gone_mad: works everytime
and yes you can have some
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: YAYAAYAYAYAYAYYAYA
lurnehaotocspel: my bldy feekd do fcuking sorw
baseoh: NICKEL
DID YOU BREAK ANY BONES????
digital hallucinations: oh wow look
its mr ballpoint pen
lurnehaotocspel: FUKC
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: WAIT THERES DOMEONE COMING ONSTAGE
YHE ORIENTSTION IS CANCELLED🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️‼️🥳🥳🥳🥳🔥🔥🔥🔥
picl: wow
imagine waiting more than an hour just for the damn orientation to be cancelled
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: WHO CARES
WE CAN GET LUNCH
britishly 🤝 mexican: you are aware that we are required to return immediately to the classrooms before lunch, right?
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: okay miss fancy words
but anyways
LUCNH‼️‼️‼️‼️🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🗣️🗣️🗣️
I CAN SEE YOU GUSY🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️
kudos-to-fanblr: update
me and nickel both have lunch and after-school detention
farewell suckers
enjoy your freedom
britishly 🤝 mexican: is that a "The Sound Of Music" reference i see?
more specifically the song "So Long, Farewell"
kudos-to-fanblr: WAIT I TAKE MY WORDS BACK
TACO
YOU WATCH MUSICALS TOO??
blasting two trucks: yeah she likes to listen to the songs and act out the scenes with me sometimes
its actually super fun
britishly 🤝 mexican: mic, im sure i can answer for myself
blasting two trucks: yeah yeah i know!!
but i remember how you usually get shy talking to other people you arent that close with
and im technically your partner so...
britishly 🤝 mexican: fair point
thank you mic
blasting two trucks: youre welcome!!
kudos-to-fanblr: TACOMIC OFFICIALLY CANON!!!!
SOUND THE ALARM PAINTBRUSH!!!!
@error404:gender_not_found
@error404:gender_not_found
@error404:gender_not_found
picasso_gone_mad: why are so many people atting me today??
no fan im not doing that
kudos-to-fanblr: 😔😔
it was worth a try
ANYWAYS
@megaphone @british&mexicantarzan
have you guys thought about joining the theater club???
we could do a live reenactment of epic, hamilton, and a few other musicals
britishly🤝mexican: ill consider
blasting two trucks: im basically going to be having the same answer as taco because were both going to join the same club
we both like singing and acting so the theater club looks more promising
im starting to talk like taco
britishly🤝mexican: it'll help you with your english homework, wont it?
blasting two trucks: i guess
digital hallucinations: @ao3_at_25:00 how is nickel walking if his body is sore???
baseoh: good question
kudos-to-fanblr: oh
he isnt
ballpoint pens carrying him
🧪🧬remaining braincell⚛️⚗️: can confirm
i passed by them in the hall
digital hallucinations: WAIT
WAIT
WAIT
WHAT???
baseoh: MY JAW DROPPED.
the_real_kettle: thats pathetic
even for nickel
academically dull: especially for nickel
britishly🤝mexican: quite pathetic indeed
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: i cant express how much i hate this fucking class.
so our teacher gave us seating arrangements right??
then i sit beside this girl who looks like salt but shes mostly wearing grey and black (and i was confused bc salt isnt in my class)
and i thought itd be okay to say hi so i go "hi salt"
AND THIS MF GOES "im not salt, i just look like her"
THEN HER BITCHASS TURNS TO HER FRIEND AND TELLS HER ABOUT ME WHILE POINTING AT ME WITH HER THUMB
i lose all joy and whimsy the exact moment i enter this forsaken room.
picasso_gone_mad: but you missed school from monday to wednesday?
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: still painty
still
kudos-to-fanblr: forsaken mentioned
blasting two trucks: oh wait lightbulbs pissed???
lightbulb is pissed???
oh my god this entire gc is fucked
picasso_gone_mad: @brightestbulbinthegc do you atleast know her name?
i just wanna talk
blasting two trucks: WERE SO COOKED???
hey atleast lightbursh canon @ao3_at_25:00
digital hallucinations: if this enitre gc was leaked wed have to move to a new continent and live as different people
blasting two trucks: realest shit ever
kudos-to-fanblr: @mexican&britishtarzan have you considered the theater long enough??
britishly🤝mexican: i have
i'll be joining after classes
blasting two trucks: then ill be joining too!!
kudos-to-fanblr: thats great!!
(*couhgcoughsimpcoughcough*)
blasting two trucks: hey.
you literally cannot be talking you tEST TUBE SIMP
kudos-to-fanblr: HEY
oh into lunch detention i go
✨💫Th3L!gHt0fYu0RL!Fe💫✨: YES
YES
FREEDOMMM
TEMPORARY FREEDOM🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️🥳🥳🥳🥳
I HAVE SOME APOLLO CHOCOLATE TO GET TO
britishly🤝mexican: i am falling asleep to musicals once more
so long, farewell