Chapter Text
Virginia May 1862
Abel relished the cool afternoon breeze as he and Jacob rode their horses toward the lake at the far side of Abel’s ranch. Pulling back to a slow trot before dismounting, Abel reached for both sets of reins and tied them to a low-slung branch of one of the many apple trees. It was Sunday afternoon and the majority of Abel’s ranch hands were away doing their own thing. All except Jacob, who'd foregone lunch at the main house for a picnic by the water’s edge. The bottled homemade lemonade which Abel had brought up earlier was already in a net tied to the dock, keeping cool as it bobbed up and down in the water.
Abel had an idea that Sophia his housekeeper knew more about his relationship with Jacob than she let on. She prepared enough to feed two for their picnic and she’d waved them off with a smile on her face as they galloped away. Whatever she knew she kept to herself, her fondness and loyalty for Abel obvious, but her affection had apparently spread to include Jacob.
“Here,” Abel said as he grabbed the blanket from his saddle and tossed it across the clearing. Jacob caught it with barely a glance and Abel smiled to himself before turning to unpack the food from his saddlebags. Jacob had spread the blanket by the time Abel passed, dropping the food onto the soft material as Abel made his way to the bottles of lemonade and handed Jacob a bottle of the refreshing beverage.
“Thanks,” Jacob said, undoing several buttons on his shirt and tugging it free of his breeches to combat the heat. He kicked off his shoes, and raised his bottle in Abel’s direction before taking a long swallow.
“Sundays are my favorite day of the week,” Abel announced as he made himself comfortable beside Jacob on the blanket, careful of the food. “No one around for miles, just the two of us.” He tilted his head and looked at their surroundings, both Abel and Jacob safe, sheltered by a copse of trees.
Jacob nodded, his mouth busy with a ham sandwich. “Me too,” he said, chasing down the meat with another swallow of his lemonade. Abel huffed out a laugh, fond and amused as Jacob stuffed the last of the sandwich in his mouth, chewing down hungrily before draining the dregs of his drink and lying back on the blanket with a satisfied groan.
Abel propped his untouched drink between the roots of a nearby tree and sighed contentedly as he shuffled closer to Jacob, turning on his side and propping himself up on his elbow. He smiled, dimples appearing as he picked up a twig and stroked it across Jacob’s cheek, along his jawline, and down past the several opened buttons of Jacob’s shirt. Confident they could have more than a quick stolen kiss or the brush of a hand. Jacob’s bared skin was dotted by a constellation of freckles, flesh darkened from where Jacob went shirtless, the cinnamon marks coaxed out by the afternoon sun.
Abel picked up the twig once more and stroked it around one of Jacob’s nipples, dragging it back and forward over the hardened nub, provoking a low moan from the man beneath him. “You like that?” he asked, knowing Jacob did, but needing to hear it just the same.
“Yes,” Jacob hissed, canting his hips up as Abel continued his downward path, all the way to Jacob’s navel, stopping to circle around it several times, slowly as he eased the twig beneath the waistline of Jacob’s breeches, the fabric was already pulled tight, straining against the bulge of Jacob’s hardened cock.
“I dream of moments like this,” Jacob whispered, awed at the way Abel could make him feel. Abel paused, a soft faraway look crossing his handsome face his hazel eyes darkening. His hands paused in their perusal of Jacob's body, still for a moment, and Jacob tilted his head questioningly. “Hey, where’d you go?” Jacob whispered, regaining Abel’s attention.
Abel took a deep breath, and looked down at Jacob as he lay sprawled, open and ready, before him. His face awash with love and affection. “I dream of you,” Abel replied. “All my dreams are built around you.”
“What about the ranch?” Jacob teased.
Abel shrugged. He’d owned the ranch for ten years, building it up with his own bare hands. It was his pride and his joy. As was the stable, which was twice the size as when he’d bought it. There was no doubt of his love for the place. As for Jacob, he’d been Abel’s lover for a little over a year, but if he had to choose it would be moments like this, the two of them together at the lake. Their special place, Abel was sure it was created purely with the two of them in mind. He pulled himself back from his reverie and yanked on the top button on Jacob’s breeches, pulling at the heavy cotton in his haste to have Jacob naked. Work-roughened hands eased his cock free of the restricting material, dragging the garment down past Jacob’s hips, his thighs, and off.
“I need you,” Abel said, his voice hoarse, his throat dry, playfulness over. “Now and always.”
“You have me,” Jacob breathed as Abel freed himself of his boots, kicking them off and divesting himself of the rest of his clothes. A slight smattering of hair peppered his chest, darkening as it narrowed down to the thatch of dark fuzz surrounding his cock, the flesh thickening as he knelt between Jacob’s thighs on the blanket.
“This better?” Abel asked, his smile wide, coaxing out his dimples.
“Much,” Jacob teased, his smile matching Abel’s as he pulled him down and kissed him, hard on the mouth. His need for Abel was obvious as he wrestled him, rolling them over on the blanket so Jacob could lie on top, coming to rest between Abel’s thighs. “Much better.”
Abel looked up from his position, the grin on his face making room for a look of pleasure, all laughter spent, both knowing how limited their time together was. “Come on,” Abel pleaded, all thought of foreplay smothered beneath the need to have Jacob inside him, at one with him. “Please!”
“I’ve got you,” Jacob breathed, spreading Abel’s thighs wide as Jacob took hold of his cock, rubbing it in the cleft of Abel’s ass, coating his puckered entrance with pre-come.
“Ready?” Jacob asked, spitting on his hand and coating his cock before pushing himself into Abel, just a fraction, then one slow and steady thrust until he was fully sheathed inside. Abel opened up easily for Jacob, clenching around Jacob’s cock. Holding him tight, Abel’s thighs cradled Jacob as he began to pull out only to push back in.
“Always,” Abel moaned.
Jacob was surrounded by heat, the sun beating down between the trees warmed his back, sweat beading his forehead as he thrust into Abel, once and again. He looked down at Abel, watched as he closed his eyes, his head tilted back, exposing the long line of his throat, his jaw clenched, as he hissed between his teeth.
“I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of this,” Abel moaned. “Enough of you.”
Abel counted himself lucky. He had the ranch, his home, something he’d worked hard to achieve; but he never felt more at home than when he was naked beneath Jacob, with Jacob filling him, thrusting in and out, hitting the spot that never failed to make him writhe, and cant his hips for more, for as much of Jacob as possible.
“I know,” Jacob whispered, stroking a lock of dark hair that had fallen onto Abel’s forehead, obscuring his face. Jacob needed to see the look in Abel’s eyes, and brushed the thick strands away to be met by a look of pure, aching want. Abel’s hazel eyes darkened with love and lust.
“Oh God!” Jacob groaned, as Abel wrapped his legs around him, cradling him tight as he dug his heels into the small of Jacob’s back. The move forced him closer, deeper, thighs trembling as he rocked against the sweet pressure of the body beneath him.
“I’ve never felt so wanted, so loved as when I’m with you,” Abel confessed lifting his hands to cradle Jacob’s face, pulling him down into a tight clinch and kissing him on the mouth.
Jacob was surrounded, every inch of his body had contact, skin on skin. Abel’s thighs wrapped tight around him, his arms enclosed Jacob’s shoulders, his fingers delved into Jacob’s dirty blond hair, holding him close as Jacob plundered his mouth. He swallowed Jacob’s moan, tasted it as it danced over his tongue. He knew he wouldn’t last long, he never did when they could be together like this, naked, unabashed, as opposed to the fleeting moments of stolen pleasure. But now, it was just the two of them, together at their special place. Richmond had the name, wise protector and it couldn’t have been more so for Abel and Jacob.
Here, with nothing but the afternoon breeze for company; the sway of branches as they danced in the sunlight, the soft whinny of the horses as they threw back their heads, and the water lapping against the dock.
“Do you ever get the feeling we’ve done this before?” Abel said. He closed his eyes, inhaling sharply as Jacob thrust particularly hard, lungs filling with the scent of water and sun-baked vegetation.
“Like we were meant to be?” Jacob replied breathlessly. He arched and pulled back and reached for Abel’s cock only to find Abel’s hand already there as he fisted himself in time with each sharp snap of Jacob’s hips.
“Oh God,” Jacob hissed, eyes glazed as he looked down, watching the way Abel fisted his own cock. He loved to watch Abel pleasure himself, almost as much as watching the way Abel’s body opened for him. It never failed to push him over the edge. He wanted it to last but knew he couldn’t. He tried to hold on, long enough for Abel to catch up and was rewarded when Abel cried out Jacob’s name, hot semen coating his stomach as Jacob thrust in once crying out before he came, pouring everything he had into Abel.
“Always,” Jacob said catching his breath. “It’s like this place was made for us.”
Abel smiled shifting away from Jacob, both lying on their backs on the blanket, their hands joined as they fought to control their breathing. Abel’s dark hair fell over to caress his brow, the afternoon heat and love making causing the sweat to bead his forehead.
“Abel, I…” Jacob began, taking a deep breath as Abel lifted himself, taking his weight on his elbow, to stare down at Jacob.
“What is it?” Abel asked.
“I just…” Jacob tried again.
“What? You can tell me,” Abel said.
“Nothing, it can wait,” Jacob said. He forced out a bright smile, pushing himself up from the blanket, and staring down at Abel. “Last one in gets to muck out the stables.”
Abel chased after Jacob, both sprinting toward the lake, Abel diving into the water a second after Jacob. The coolness of the lake was a relief from the afternoon heat. Abel crested the water, shaking his shoulder-length hair free of any lingering droplets, as Jacob trod water several feet away, his face wreathed in smiles. Abel swam over, pressing down on Jacob’s shoulders until he disappeared beneath the water, only to surface moments later, his laughter echoing across the lake.
They swam for a while, lapping each other and diving beneath the clear surface until Jacob eventually pulled himself up onto the dock, holding out his hand for Abel, pulling him back onto dry land, both using the blanket to dry off and getting dressed so as not to burn in the afternoon heat. Both were content to lie on their backs, staring up at the pale blue sky both comfortable to just be, as mid-afternoon eventually gave way to early evening.
Jacob fastened the last of the buttons on his breeches while Abel filled his saddlebag with apples, eager to taste one of Sophia’s succulent apple pies. He mounted his horse, waiting for Jacob to draw level with him before coaxing the horse into a steady trot back to the main house. The lingering warmth of the evening made the return trek bearable, pleasant even. Both dismounted and led the horses into the stable, removing their tack before giving them water and releasing them into the paddock.
“Are you coming up to the house?” Abel asked.
“I’ve got things to do,” Jacob said, wanting nothing more than to be with Abel, but he found it hard, having to refrain from reaching out and touching him. Even the simplest of touches or a soft spoken-word beyond the borders of their glade could bring trouble to their door.
Abel nodded, he wanted nothing more than to kiss Jacob, but didn’t dare risk it, but Jacob could read the look of want on Abel’s face.
“You know,” Jacob said. "No matter how harshly the world critiques us, my heart still beats only for you."
Abel nodded. He wanted it too, to be able to go through their days out in the open, no more hiding or secluded spots. To greet each other with a kiss instead of a slap on the back. To say the words, out loud, and in public without the fear of reprisal.
Free to be themselves.
~*~
Jacob didn’t see Abel the next morning when he arrived at the house for a cup of coffee before starting his day. It was a busy week at the ranch. Abel and his other workers were preparing the small herd of cattle for auction. Abel kept enough stock back to see the ranch through winter, and to replenish his herd in the spring but the rest were all headed for sale. Jacob finished his cup of coffee and kissed Sophia on the cheek. She flushed crimson, her smile lighting up her face.
“No rest for the wicked,” Jacob said, as he filled his canteen with fresh water and made his way to the stables, relishing the shade of the roofline before leading the horses to the paddock. He filled the hay mangers before returning to the coolness of the stable to muck out the stalls.
It set the routine for the next few days. Jacob arriving at the ranch each morning after Abel had left, and departing again before his return. Jacob knew Abel was busy with his cattle, confident Jacob would care for the horses but it didn't stop the pang of missing each other.
It was mid-afternoon on the fifth day of not seeing each other the longest they’d gone without each other’s company, and Jacob had missed Abel something fierce.
He settled for pouring his love into a letter that he’d safely deposited under Abel’s pillow incriminating passion inked on plain white note stock, but the act at least had released a little of the pressure that had been building up inside his chest. There was glorious sunshine outside, but Abel was expecting a storm something he attributed to the sudden temperature drop and not Jose's rheumatic knee. Abel had left word that he didn’t want any of the horses left out in the paddock. Abel had already led the cattle into the barn and Jacob sweated as he mucked out the stables, refreshing the hay and water buckets before leading the last of the horses inside. The heat sweltered, Jacob happy to be back inside the stable out of the sun. He took off his shirt and used it to wipe his brow, his undershirt clinging to his muscled arms and shoulders as Jacob reached for his canteen and took a long swallow of water. He stretched up to scratch an itch and pulled away a handful of hay, and then another as it drifted down onto his head and shoulders. He looked up half expecting to see one of the cats that lived in the stables to keep out the vermin, but instead saw Abel, sitting on a wooden beam above him, his legs dangling over the edge as he tossed another handful of hay at Jacob.
“Funny,” Jacob said, his smile a mile wide.
“I thought so,” Abel laughed.
“That’s the last of them,” Jacob said, as he hooked his thumb in the direction of the many stalls, and made his way over the ladder that led to the loft. Jacob’s intent was obvious as he reached the top step and began to unfasten his breeches, stalking Abel, forcing him to take a step back and another until he hit a wall of hay. His retreat blocked, Abel could do nothing but smile.
“I’ve missed you,” Jacob said, stepping into Abel’s space, raising one hand, his fingers finding purchase in Abel’s long dark hair as he tugged him down. He slanted his mouth over Abel’s, coaxing his lips to part enough for Jacob to tease his way inside. Jacob’s tongue searched and found Abel’s, stroking it for a brief moment before sucking it into the warm, wet heat of his mouth.
Jacob eased back, aware they could be discovered at any time, but desperate for more.
It had been five days of not seeing the other, remembering the last moment they’d shared, both naked, joined together as they lay spread out on the blanket by the lake. Only now there was no time for foreplay or niceties. Each needed the other too much to let the moment slip past. Jacob yanked the top button on Abel’s breeches free, pulling at the material in his haste to free some skin, taking hold of Abel’s shoulder and spinning him around until he faced the hay bales, his breeches falling down around his ankles as Jacob forced him to bend over.
Abel grabbed at the hay for purchase, the sweat already beading his forehead and his top lip as Jacob pulled at his own breeches, just enough to free his cock as he crowded close behind Abel.
Jacob couldn’t get enough of moments like this, of Abel. He cherished every minute, every touch, even the smallest contact. Holding Abel’s hand as they walked the perimeter of the ranch, safe from prying eyes and the way Abel’s palm rested unseen on Jacob’s thigh beneath the dinner table. All the little things, the most simple touches, but they made Jacobs heart swell, made his breath catch whenever Abel was near. The way Abel looked at Jacob, like now, as Abel glanced back over his shoulder, his face overflowing with love and adoration, mirroring Jacob’s feelings. The need to have, and to hold. Stolen kisses, wherever and whenever they could grab them. Whispered words of love. Never a day went by when Jacob didn’t say the words to Abel, or write them in a letter. It was more than sex, more than being lovers, more than sharing their bodies. It was sharing everything they had, body and soul.
“Come on, move,” Abel rasped, desperate, wanting, needing for Jacob to fill him. There was a time to take it slow, to share each other, and give of each other, and a time to want, to take and to have. Both were aware of their surroundings, the smell of horse sweat and manure and the very real danger of being caught. The fear of discovery urged them both on, each desperate to take everything they could from the other.
Jacob kicked Abel’s feet apart, as much as the breeches bunched around his ankles would allow. He wanted Abel naked, ached to have hot skin under his hands but knew they’d need to be able to pull their garments up should anyone wander into the stable. The need to be able to adjust their clothing, to look presentable lay heavy on them both. As far as everyone was aware, they were cleaning out the stables, which would explain why the both of them were soaked in sweat and covered in hay.
“I want you so much,” Abel moaned, as he pushed back against Jacob, fisting handfuls of hay as he bent over, bare ass pushed out in desperate invitation.
“You’ve got me,” Jacob promised as he fisted himself, coating his cock with pre-come before penetrating Abel’s entrance and moaning as Abel opened up for him, bending over further and taking Jacob deeper.
“That’s it,” Abel urged as Jacob thrust in. The drag back out was electric all the way to the tip, Jacob rolling his hips as he shoved back in, angling his pelvis and searching for the spot that had Abel crying out. His lover's body twitched and tightened as Jacob snapped his hips, hard and fast, his face a mask of concentration. His eyes closed tight, bottom lip caught between his teeth his cheeks flushed a florid crimson, his hair plastered to his face as he thrust in and out of Abel. Abel matching Jacob’s rhythm, pushing back, desperate to reach his peak, forgetting someone could stumble in on them at any moment. Lost to everything but the feel of Jacob inside him, the heat and pressure of being filled, bereft as Jacob pulled out, anxious, only to push back, welcoming his lover as Jacob thrust deeper again.
“Please,” Abel moaned.
“Hush,” Jacob urged, concentrating on Abel, but trembling with the strain of keeping an ear out for any noise from beneath them. He heard a horse whinny, stomping its hooves, there was a slight rumble of distant thunder as the beginning of the storm made itself known. Other than that they were safe, but the storm would bring the others back and Jacob needed, wanted to take Abel to the edge, to that place where nothing existed but each other.
Jacob stepped in closer, not so much as a whisper of air separated them and rutted deep, angling his hips, finding the spot he was looking for, and felt Abel clench tight with him as he moaned long and loud.
“Right there,” Abel said, leaning over the hay bale and pushing back as Jacob picked up his pace. Sweat trickled down his face, as he struggled to bring his breathing under control, sucking in a breath and blowing it out, almost there.
He was desperate for Abel to match his rhythm as Jacob reached around and took Abel’s cock in his hand, fisting him in time with the snap of his hips.
“Yes,” Abel moaned, coating Jacob’s hand in come as he reached his peak, Jacob stiffened as Abel’s body clenched tight around Jacob’s cock sending him over the edge.
There was no time to savour each other’s company, to revel in a well-earned afterglow. Each pulled up his breeches and made himself somewhat presentable. Both intent on using the outdoor water pump to wash away some of the sweat and hay before entering the house. Jacob tucked his shirt in one-handed even as he started climbing down the ladder, Abel following behind him.
“I’ll check the horses,” Jacob said, as the first bolt of lightning lit up the sky. He was about to walk over to the stalls when Abel reached out, one hand curved around the back of Jacob’s head, Abel stooped down to steal one last kiss.
“I love you,” he whispered just loud enough for Jacob to hear.
“I love you too,” Jacob replied, and stopped to pull an errant piece of hay from Abel’s hair.
“Will you stay here tonight?” Abel asked. Most workers paid for board and lodging at the main house, all except Jacob, who left each night for his own home, which was a long walk from the stables. “The storm is sure to last the night, and I don’t want you walking home alone under such conditions.”
Jacob nodded and watched the look of relief spread over Abel’s face. Thunder boomed overhead.
“I’ll double-check the horses,” Abel said, making sure each had food and water and the stall doors were locked and secure. Once Abel was sure they were all safe he made his way to the barn doors, securing them after Jacob just as the rain began to pelt down.
It was a few minutes’ walk to the main house. They were both sodden by the time they kicked off their boots and made their way into the kitchen, to where a hot vegetable stew simmered on the stove. Abel stopped to press a kiss to Sophia’s cheek, dodging the wooden spoon she waved in his direction as he stole a forkful of stew.
“Get out of those wet clothes,” she ordered. “You too, Jacob, before you both catch your death.”
Both men nodded. Jacob followed Abel up the stairs before parting, Jacob heading to the room next door to Abel’s. He didn't stay over often, usually only when there was a horse in foal, but he was grateful this evening that Sophia had put out dry towels on his bed and that he had several changes of clothes. He unfastened his breeches and drawers, shivering as the sticky air bit at his damp skin.
He pulled both shirts over his head and scrubbed himself dry before tugging on his clean clothes and walked downstairs to the kitchen in search of a hot cup of coffee.
Abel was already seated at the kitchen table, cup in his hand as the rest of his workers wandered into the house in search of dry clothes and a hot meal. The storm outside had picked up swiftly the wind whistling around the house, searching for the slightest crevice in the wood to creep its way in. The window shutters rattled. Jacob poured himself a coffee and took a seat beside Abel, his thigh pressed tight to Abel’s as he moved up the bench to make way for four of his men. The talk turned from the weather to the war raging not far from their borders, the Union soldiers creeping further into their territory every day.
“You’re quiet,” Abel said. Jacob didn't reply, busying himself with the bowl of vegetable stew, taking a mouthful in the hope that the subject would change. He’d been meaning to talk to Abel about his decision but had put it off for as long as he could. He’d meant to tell Abel that afternoon, but as was usually the case, their need for each other trumped whatever Jacob had to say. Jacob loved to see Abel’s smile, content and in love. He hated being the one to shatter his happiness.
“I…” Jacob began, noticing the way several men turned in his direction. “Not here,” Jacob murmured, taking another mouthful of his meal as the conversation picked up around him once more. As it was, Abel busied himself talking with his workers about the pending market and the possibility of purchasing a prize stallion to add to Abel’s herd, as if nothing was amiss, like there wasn’t a war raging on their doorstep.
Jacob was the first to call it a night, the others opting to continue their conversation over a whiskey, Abel got to his feet as Jacob bid a goodnight. He was clearly torn, but Jacob knew he wouldn’t follow, not in the main house.
“Later,” Abel said a hint of a promise in his words and the way he looked at Jacob.
Jacob knew by Abel’s tone their conversation wasn’t over, Abel’s curiosity, his need to know what was behind Jacob’s silence hung in the air between them.
The storm worried him, but this one felt even more ominous. Jacob couldn’t withhold the truth from Abel any longer. He had a feeling the storm had only just begun.
Morning came bright and early. Jacob climbed out of bed. He saw that a letter had been pushed under the door, and he stooped to pick it up. His name was written on it in Abel's handwriting. He tucked it into his pocket and walked down the stairs, following the aroma of fresh coffee. Jacob looked out of the window to find the sun shining. There was no damage to the outbuildings, except for a few fallen branches.
Jacob stepped outside and toward the stables, opening the stalls and leading the horses out to the paddock. Abel was already at the other side of the pasture with the men who were attending the cattle market. He knew Abel planned to be gone for two days, to sell the stock, keeping back only his prize bull and several first-calf heifers for the spring calving.
Jacob waited until all the horses were safe in the paddock, the mangers filled with hay and the fresh water in the troughs before making his way back to the stable. He took a seat on a bale of hay and pulled out Abel’s letter.
My dearest Jacob
I expect to be gone for two days, which I know isn’t long, but it will be two days without you, two days during which I will miss you. Your smile, the touch of your hand. The stolen moments which are never enough, but have to make do.
Think of me while I am gone, safe in the knowledge I will be thinking of you, waiting until the time I can be with you again.
You are my love, my life, and the very reason I look forward to the future.
Always and forever.
Abel.
Jacob stroked his thumb over Abel’s name. He wanted nothing more than to ride out and bid him farewell in person, even knowing the danger, sometimes a slap on the back just wasn’t enough. Instead, he read the letter a second time, before folding it and putting securely in his pocket, safe until he could get home and place it in the box with the other letters he had received from Abel.
It was Saturday, and Abel wouldn’t be back until Monday, which meant Jacob had Sunday all to himself. He could ride out to the lake, but it wouldn’t be the same without Abel. He could practice what it was he needed to tell Abel, but he had tried too many times over the past week. Tried and failed. He knew it would cause heartbreak, and Jacob was in no rush to cause Abel any pain, but he needed to do something other than pretend their idyllic time together on the ranch wasn’t under the threat of war.
Jacob knew his decision could shatter what they had, could destroy their relationship, but he’d made up his mind, and there was no going back.
He just needed to find a way to break the news.
The two days dragged by. Jacob tried to keep busy but all he could think about was Abel and the difficult conversation that was coming.
Jacob decided to spend Saturday night at the ranch. Several of Abel’s workers were at the market with Abel, others no doubt would spend their time off in town, while several remained to help Jacob attend to the horses. It was no hardship, Sophia having prepared a hot meal for them as they returned to the main house, Jacob confident that the horses were all fed, watered and safe in their stalls.
~*~
Monday morning found Jacob up and out early, seeing to the herd before taking a break mid-afternoon. He was leaning on the fence that surrounded the paddock, one foot propped on the first rung as he rested on the top bar. He'd been lost in his own head, watching the horses, when he heard a commotion behind him.
“Steady,” a familiar voice crooned and Jacob turned around to see Abel wrestling with a stallion, pure black from head to hoof and seemingly laden with attitude. “Easy fella,” Abel continued as he coaxed the horse over to where Jacob was standing. It tried to rear up on its back legs as Jacob opened the fence to the smaller paddock, separated, just in case a new horse took a dislike to one of the herd. Near enough to become acquainted but not enough to cause injury to another horse.
“Isn’t he a beauty?” Abel said, once the stallion was secured and given time to settle down.
“He sure is,” Jacob said.
“A couple of weeks under your tutelage and I reckon he’ll make a valuable asset to the herd.” Abel frowned when there was no response from Jacob.
“What is it?” Abel asked, worrying creasing his forehead.
“I….” Jacob took a deep breath, knowing it was now or never. There was no easy way to say it, God knew he’d tried.
“Walk with me,” Abel said, surprising Jacob, taking his arm and steering him toward the stables away from anyone who might happen upon them. Neither wanted to do anything other than take each other’s hand, but aware of their surroundings. Abel waited until they were safely in the barn. He took a mouthful of cooler air before turning around and grabbing both of Jacob’s hands, his attention solely on the man before him.
“What’s going on with you?” Abel asked, squeezing Jacob’s hands, concern in both his voice and the worried look he cast at Jacob.
“Remember that mustering officer that came by a couple of weeks ago looking for recruits?” Jacob said.
“Yes,” Abel said, taking a deep breath.
“I presented myself for enlistment,” Jacob said, and watched a look of horror that suddenly appeared across Abel’s face. “I’ve been instructed to report to boot camp. They’ve given me a short period of time to pack what gear I need to take with me and bid farewell to loved ones and put any personal business in order.”
“You’re not serious?” Abel gasped. “We’ve talked about this.”
“I know,” Jacob began, his voice heavy with the weight of the world, “But they’re raging closer and closer. Each day brings the Union soldiers nearer our door, like a storm gathering strength on the horizon. Look around you; the comforting familiarity of our homes has been transformed into makeshift headquarters, once-safe havens now buzzing with the frantic energy of men planning battles. The churches and schoolhouses, which once echoed with laughter and hymns, are now solemn shelters for the dying, filled with the heavy scent of fear and the whisper of prayers. Jacob took a deep breath, his chest tightening with anguish. “Abel, we are slaughtering each other in our own cornfields and orchards, where we once toiled in peace, and now witness the horrors of war unfold among the very crops that nourished us.”
“But –” Abel began.
“I know, I know,” Jacob said. “I don’t agree with the reasons we’re fighting this war any more than you do but the Union soldiers are threatening our homes, and threatening everything you’ve worked for.”
“Look around you! Do you see any slaves here? Nor will you ever!”
“That won’t stop them.”
“But the ranch?” Abel asked.
“Pretty soon there won’t be a ranch to protect, not unless we beat them back. It won’t be long before they confiscate a hefty share of the ranch’s food and livestock for the cause.” Jacob declared. “I’ve been told by the recruitment office that my time at West Point will secure me a lieutenancy.”
“Jacob, those firing at you aren’t going to stop to see what insignia you wear. They’re not going to care about anything but putting a bullet in you, and I for one did not give you my heart for it to be returned to me wrapped in burlap.”
“I have to do something,” Jacob said. “I don’t expect you to understand, but this isn’t the ninety-day war which was predicted.”
“This isn’t all brass bands and glory,” Abel said, his voice heavy with an unshakable sorrow. Shadows danced across his face, highlighting the weariness in his eyes. “There’s more bloodshed than rainwater,” he continued, his words thick with the weight of unspoken memories, as if each drop of blood had soaked into the earth itself, merging with the soil of their shared past. The stark contrast between the festive sounds of celebration and the grim reality he spoke of hung in the air, a haunting reminder of the darker truths hidden beneath the surface.
“I know that,” Jacob replied.
“When?” Abel said, his eyes were wide, trying and failing to disguise the sudden ache in his chest and the rapid-fire beat of his heart by biting back the fear in his voice.
“Next week,” Jacob admitted. “I wanted to talk to you first.”
“Just give me a couple of days,” Abel pleaded. “Two days, that’s all I ask.”
“Why?” Jacob asked, genuinely confused.
“Time to get a stable manager and someone to oversee the everyday running of the ranch.”
“Why?” Jacob asked again.
“You don’t expect me to let you go alone do you?” Abel said. “We made a promise; we go together or not at all.”
“I won’t hold you to it,” Jacob whispered, realising the enormity of the situation.
“Someone has got to make sure your ass comes home,” Abel joked, his humour not quite meeting his eyes. “We do this together.”
“I love you,” Jacob said, wanting to step into Abel’s arms, but conscious of the fact that they could easily be disturbed.
~*~
Jacob and Abel pondered the future ahead, the smile wiped from their faces. Neither looked forward to firing on the enemy, to killing another human being, but both were determined to protect their dwellings, to make sure they had a home to come back to.
Jacob did as promised. He gave Abel two days, as they both walked side by side to the recruitment tent, the one of many that had sprung up in towns and rural areas. The turnout was so much greater than expected. As Abel and Jacob waited in line, they recognised several men from neighbouring farms and businesses.
Abel presented his name and vital statistics when he reached the head of the line and was duly presented with his enlistment slip. No longer a civilian ready to leave the ranch behind, but a soldier.
Abel was ready. Both he and Jacob had been given orders to pull out in two days’ time. Abel felt more than a twinge of loss at all he was leaving behind, but at least he was secure in the knowledge that his new ranch manager would keep the place as Abel left it. Nathan had worked alongside Abel for five years. If anyone could pick up the slack it would be him. Sophia would keep the house in order of that he had no doubt.
Abel awoke the next morning, turning over and eyeing his uniform hanging on the back of his bedroom door. They weren’t kidding when they said the uniforms were rag-tag at best, and short, the variety of sizes being made for the standard height of most men of the time. Unfortunately, Abel was anything but standard or average. Being well over six feet, there was a struggle to find something that fit, putting together a uniform from bits and pieces of what was available. Abel had been endlessly grateful to Sophia, who took down the hem of his breeches to gain Abel a few extra inches, all the while fighting tears at his intended departure.
“I’ll see you again,” he promised, his voice soft yet resolute as he leaned down to affectionately kiss Sophia’s cheek. The warmth of the moment hung in the air, and he could feel her smile lingering even as he pulled away. With a practiced ease, he extended his hand to Nathan, whose grip was firm and reassuring. “Take care of the place,” Abel added, the weight of his words hinting at the bond they shared and the memories etched into every corner of their home.
As he hoisted his worn leather bag over his shoulder, its familiar heft a reminder of the journey ahead, his thoughts drifted back to the laughter that had filled the rooms. He turned toward the door, where Jacob stood patiently, his silhouette framed by the fading light. Abel took a deep breath, letting the scents of the place wash over him one last time before stepping outside, ready to embrace the uncertainty that awaited him.
“Ready?” Jacob asked.
“As I’ll ever be,” Abel replied, not looking back.