Chapter Text
Bing stared at his phone. Three weeks of radio silence from William Darcy wore thin about a week in. The video in which Bing and Gigi appeared together with Lizzie was uploaded, and Darcy had tried calling him for two days straight before he finally got the hint. Bing didn’t feel right about shutting him out, but he had no desire to recreate the yelling match he had with Caroline after she first watched the same video.
He had to deal with a sibling living under the same roof, so for the sake of civility he and Caroline decided to speak to each other again a few days later. Afterwards, Caroline practically frog marched him to tell the truth to their parents.
His mother then lectured him about the generations of Lees in medicine. From the ancestor who landed in the Bay Area selling herbal remedies to prospectors to the great-grandfather who was a medic with the U.S. Army convalescent hospital in San Francisco, before integration. His father was less emphatic; but then again, being one of the few educated young people coming out of a Depression-flattened area of the Midwest didn't made him all too sympathetic to the son who was now throwing three years of medical school back in his face.
So it was that he watched his best friend get a second chance with one Bennet sister in San Francisco, while he was guilt-ridden over another in Los Angeles.
For the first time in his life, he wanted to hit Darcy, even when he was comforting Lizzie Bennet. Jane was practically crying for all the internet to see, and he was about five months too late to do anything about it. He could feel the bile rise in his throat when Caroline showed up to make excuses for his absence.
His little sister too often needed to be reminded that her cynicism didn’t make her wiser.
“You didn’t have to come with us. You didn’t have to sever all contact with her. We were just trying to protect you, and you seemed to go along with it!”
“Yeah? I’ve been trying to ‘protect’ you from William Darcy for years, but you’ve gone ahead and done whatever the hell you wanted on that score, haven’t you?” He knew it would be a direct hit, so it was with some relief that he watched his sister march out of the apartment. But even then he knew that Caroline was right, and furthermore, that he would eventually need to deal with his own bullshit.
However, for the first time since they became friends, it was Darcy who actually seemed to be in over his head.
Jane was no longer in Los Angeles, but before he thought about going back upstate, he had to speak to Darcy again, preferably while he was still in the general area. Unfortunately, unlike every other person in his social orbit, Bing did not thrive on confrontation.
It was after twelve in the morning; but if Bing remembered the dude’s habits accurately, he was likely still awake.
“Bing.” Darcy answered after the second ring, voice tired and hoarse, but slightly hopeful. Bing didn't feel like apologizing for the lateness of the call, but nevertheless --
"I can call another time."
“No, no, now’s good. Let me get a drink of water …” Bing could hear the sound of the phone being placed on the table and waited. “Alright … “ Darcy’s voice returned, clearer but still exhausted.
“Are you still in Orange County?” Darcy sputtered a little.
“Yes. But how did you --?”
“How do you think?” Darcy gave a harsh sigh.
“Bing, about those videos --”
“We don’t have to talk about those right now." Bing was taken aback by his own abruptness. "I just wanted to ask if you needed any help with …George Wickham.” Darcy let out a surprised sound at the other end, and Bing let him think for a moment.
“No, you don’t want to get involved in this. Fitz and I, we’ve got it covered.” Bing flexed the fingers of his free hand.
“I need to punch someone in the face, Darcy, and it might as well be this asshole.”
Bing could hear Darcy’s shaky intake of breath, and he immediately regretted his words. They spoke over each other.
“I’m sorry, man, I shouldn’t have --”
“Bing, you have every right --”
They both stopped, but Bing spoke again first.
“Let me talk." Bing took the silence for assent and moved on. “I quit med school. After Fall semester.” Telling Darcy, it seemed, was only slightly less painful than telling his parents.
Despite being two years older, the death of Darcy's parents, his resulting transfer from Harvard to Stanford, and then his intense apprenticeship at Pemberley had delayed his graduation by two years. So it was that he and Darcy were pairing senior year assignments with preparing for the MCAT and the GMAT, respectively. Sometimes he was invited to weekends of studying with the Darcys at their city loft and at their seaside vacation home.
“Alright.” Darcy’s tone was … unintelligible.
“I haven’t been happy for a long time. Except for Jane, that is.” Bing took a deep breath. “I was already feeling … insecure, and close to quitting last summer. So maybe I … let you and Caroline influence my decisions more than I should have. And while I’m angry about what you did, I don’t blame you. It was always my life, and my choices. I can’t make excuses for that.”
“Ok.” Darcy sounded so tired that Bing thought he might be falling asleep.
“Ok.” Bing repeated, not knowing what else to say. “That’s -- that’s all. I’ll let you go --”
“No, Bing, just -- " Darcy sounded like he had just woken up. "I'm sorry, alright? It's my fault. All of these ... issues ... involving ... you, my sister, Lydia, Jane, Li-Lizzie - have arisen because I apparently have such a low opinion of everyone's ability to deal with their own business."
"Don't be drama-"
"How would you characterize it?" Bing was startled. This was perhaps the most emotional he had ever heard William Darcy.
"I don't know, we're all adults here --"
"That's the point. I didn't treat any of you like adults, like ... peers." Peers? Darcy sounded like such an old man, sometimes.
But Bing needed to put a stop to this because an emotional William Darcy was not yet in his wheelhouse.
"Darcy. I get you, ok? We all do. Well -- " he paused, thinking of Lizzie Bennet. "Most of us do, anyway. You want the best for everyone. But you're used to getting your own way, so you think you're entitled to get whatever you think the best is."
That shut him up. Bing was mildly surprised.
"Well. We can't all live up to your standards."
"Bing ... " Darcy's voice was muffled, like he was covering part of his face. "Hear me out. I don't give a damn about you being in medical school. Well -- I did, but only because I thought that's where you actually wanted to be. If you don't, well ... "
Bing waited silently, but the speech didn't follow. Apparently, Willliam Darcy wasn't going to talk to him about being irresponsible and ungrateful for his many privileges.
And from the silence on the other end, it was clear he wasn't going to talk about anything else either.
He couldn't help needling his best friend.
"You aren't going to harangue me about becoming infatuated with unsuitable young women?" Darcy let out a mirthless chuckle.
"I apologize, Bing." Darcy let out a heavy sigh. "I have been an absolute hypocrite."
"Yes." There was a long pause, during which Bing thought he could hear some fidgeting. "But, more to the point, when are you going to tell her?"
Darcy let out a huff.
"I suppose I could ask you the same." Bing sat back, surprised. He hadn't done the actual accounting for the number of days he would need before going back to Netherfield. His few volunteer commitments would end as soon as he finished his projects, much of which could be done remotely at this point.
"I just ... need to tie up some things here in L.A."
His heart started to pound. There were now no obstacles between him and Jane Bennet, except Jane Bennet herself.
"I'm going to drive in a few days." Bing took another breath. "I'm going to go, and tell her that I'm sorry." And brace himself for the probability that she was going to accept his apology, then tell him to fuck off in the most polite way possible.
Darcy didn't answer right away, and Bing was on the verge of letting him off the phone when he spoke again.
"How much of those videos did you actually see?" Bing groaned.
"Enough to feel like the world's biggest idiot. 'Letters to Charlotte'? Half the Internet must have --"
"I take it you didn't see ... the ones ... involving ..."
"Oh, I did. At least you had the guts to speak to her directly rather than skulking around and then leaving like a coward." Bing practically spit out the word. That was it. His anger at Caroline and Darcy notwithstanding, he was the one who decided to act on other people's words rather than confront Jane directly. No woman with sense would take back a coward. An unemployed coward who dropped out of med school.
"That is more generous than my actions deserve, and too harsh upon yours." Darcy cut into his self-pity. "Perhaps if, like you, I were more modest in my self-assessment, I would have nothing to regret."
Bing didn't have anything to say to this. Darcy hesitated before speaking again.
"Bing, I'm ... I have a rather early day tomorrow, so ..."
Bing looked down at the desk in front of him. It seemed like Darcy didn't want to end the conversation quite yet, and he realized that the other man's tone was approaching something like uncertainty. This was something he rarely heard from William Darcy.
He didn't want to let Bing go without hearing some kind of confirmation. About where they stood with each other. Bing realized that through all of their relationship he was usually the one waiting for approval.
"I'll speak to you later, after you ... after we ... do whatever it is we need to do." Bing cleared his throat. "Although, if you need someone to hold a guy down or post bail or something, you know where I am."
"Thank you." Bing may have imagined it, but Darcy's voice sounded a tiny bit less exhausted. "I -- I'll keep that in mind."