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Tommy's first trip to Europe is nothing like he ever imagined it would be. First of all, he's sharing it with his boyfriend, and if that wasn't enough, his boyfriend is the most amazing guy, a rockstar, and also, has wings.
The days blur into one and soon Tommy can't distinguish what happened in England, and what in Germany. He couldn't remember he was interviewed in Finland until he saw the clip. Then again, he was really hungover that day. The grounding force is Adam, though; he keeps Tommy from completely losing his mind. At night, when they both slip into bed and just sleep, Tommy feels like the world stops spinning for a while, and everything is right.
And then there are the nights where Adam pushes Tommy down to the bed and claims his mouth and then his whole body. Tommy welcomes it, but at the same time, he doesn't particularly like losing the upper hand, so whenever Adam brings his wings out — and that happens quite often — Tommy makes sure to run his hands over them, making Adam feel it, feel it all, as much as possible, driving him insane.
Yeah, Tommy's first trip to Europe is absolutely nothing like he imagined it.
Tommy and Cam fly back to the US a couple of days before Adam, Monte and LP, so Tommy has plenty of time to get some rest. He sees Adam briefly the day he gets back into the country, but they don't have time to really catch up, cause Adam's still so busy.
The second day, Adam has some press thing that runs a little late. Tommy's already at Adam's place, waiting for him to get home. Adam had texted him earlier, saying that he wouldn't take too long, so Tommy settles onto the couch to wait.
---
The event is long and boring, but the promise of a better night to come keeps Adam going. When it's finally over, he says bye to Lane — they agreed earlier that he was going to drive home himself — and eagerly pulls out of the parking lot.
The car totally comes out of nowhere. Everything happens in a weird slow-motion sped up way after that.
The car that Adam's Mustang crashes into as a result causes the airbags to open and Adam feels himself pushed into the seat. Something painful slams into his left shoulder — or. Wait. That's not his shoulder.
He never really loses consciousness. When his head clears a little, he realises his shirt is in shreds. There's really only one explanation for that. It's happened before; his wings have torn some of his favourite clothes. He thinks it's quite unfair, considering that the wings are most likely magic. Maybe it's the sacrifice he has to make for them. Get wings, lose a few shirts.
His head is spinning and he can hear sirens in the distance. Nothing really hurts, at least nothing he can pinpoint. He figures he should get a jacket to cover himself up, cause he really doesn't want to explain the shirt thing. He can see it's still where he put it on the passenger seat. As he reaches for it, something in his back shifts, and he cries out in pain. He must have torn something, he thinks miserably, and hopes the ER gets here fast. He really hopes everyone in the other cars is all right.
He must have blanked out for a moment, because the next thing he knows, he's in the ambulance.
"Sir, can you lift your arms," someone asks him, and he raises them both just to prove it to himself. He winces at the pain it causes in his back, but — No, it's not his back that's hurt. He was confused before, but someone must have given him something to clear his head, cause he realises it now, it's not his back that's causing the pain. It's his wings.
They x-ray his back in the hospital and Adam tries really hard to keep his breathing steady. His body is sending him completely mixed signals. He wants to spread out his wings, wants someone to examine the damage, but at the same time, besides the fact that he knows he can't, he also absolutely dreads moving them. What he wants on top of all is a hug.
He gets it when Lane arrives at the hospital, and it's really a rare occurrence for her to hug him, so he's surprised and incredibly thankful.
The police come by, ask him some questions, and tell him to come into the office to give a seconds statement, when he's feeling more coherent. He doesn't think he has any troubles with coherency right now, but when he tries to tell Lane that, she just rolls her eyes, and pats his head. She asks what happened to the other people involved in the accident, and Adam feels a weight lift from him when he hears no one is critically injured.
A doctor comes in to tell him that he's free to go. Adam nods gratefully — hey, they did give him painkillers — and Lane leads him out of the hospital and drives him home. Adam wants to tell her about his wings being hurt, but he can't get the words out. He can tell Lane isn't convinced when he tells her he's fine, but that might also be due to the fact that he was just in a car accident, and no one can really be fine after that.
She pulls up in front of his home and tells him to go get some rest.
"We'll handle the press tomorrow, but I don't think it'll be a big deal. As long as you let your fans know you're fine, before they get the chance to freak out."
"Thank you," he says, and gingerly gets out of the car.
"Adam," she calls. "You're not gonna be alone now, right?"
"Tommy's here," he says, and he really hopes he didn't make it up, 'cause right now he can't remember for sure.
"Good," she says and smiles. "Call me if you need anything."
She drives off and Adam stands there, willing himself to move. The thought of Tommy waiting for him is what finally gives him the push he needs.
---
Tommy's half asleep on the couch when he hears Adam get home. He's up and heading towards the door in no time. He spots Adam leaning against the doorframe and hurries forward.
"Adam?"
"Hey, baby," Adam says, and takes a couple of steps forward. He sways as if he's about to tip over, but keeps his footing.
"Jesus, Adam, what happened?" Tommy asks, reaching out for Adam's hand.
"Car accident," says Adam. "Lane dropped me home. Wasn't my fault. Came out of nowhere. Everyone is fine."
He sounds as if it hurts to talk, and Tommy can't see straight, he's so angry at whomever's to blame for this.
"Why aren't you in the hospital?"
"I'm fine. They said I was fine. That I could rest at home," Adam slurs.
Tommy places a hand on Adam's waist and the other in his shoulder, to help him stay upright.
"Bullshit, you can barely —"
"It's my wings."
"What?" Tommy says.
"I can feel it," Adam whispers, and closes his eyes as if he's in pain. No, wait, he is in pain. Tommy doesn't know if he can handle this. "They — I don't know what happened, but something's wrong with them."
"Okay, you should sit down," Tommy says and wraps one arm around Adam's waist.
"Bed," Adam says, and rests his body-weight on Tommy. Tommy tightens his grip on Adam's waist and slowly walks with him to the bedroom. Once there, he pulls off Adam's jacket and sets it on the side.
"What happened to your shirt? Your wings?"
"I think so," Adam says. "Just tear it off."
"Adam," Tommy says, "this is one of your favorite shirts, come on."
"It's already in shreds," Adam replies. "And, oh god, my car."
"Tommy steps closer and places his hands on Adam's face, gently massaging his temples.
"Hey," he says. "We're going to get this shirt off you, mostly intact. We're going to fix your wings. And the car will get fixed, too, okay?"
He punctuates every sentence with a small kiss. Adam relaxes against him and nods. Tommy unbuttons his shirt and gently pulls it off.
"Okay," he says. "Now get on the bed. Let me see."
Adam steps forward and gingerly lies down on the bed. Tommy waits for him to open his wings, but when he doesn't, he rests his hand on Adam's hip, and says, "It's okay, baby."
"It's gonna hurt," Adam whispers.
"Does it hurt now?"
"Yes," Adam says, tightly, and Tommy can feel something tugging at his heart.
"If you open them, then we can fix them, okay, it will stop hurting. Let me see how bad they are."
Adam takes a deep breath and then the wings appear, as if out of nowhere. Tommy's seen them come out enough times to notice the difference now. Adam groans, and Tommy can see all the muscles in his back tensing up.
The wings move less loosely than usual, and once they're completely open, Tommy can see the damage that's been done. It's almost as if something had punctured the left wing and then clawed at the edges of the wound, spreading the pain. Because of their colour, Tommy can't tell if they're covered in blood, and he briefly wonders if Adam's wings can bleed. Evidently, they can be hurt.
Adam whimpers softly and Tommy runs his hand over Adam's left side.
"Just try to relax, okay," he says.
"How bad is it?" Adam asks.
"I can't really tell," Tommy confesses. "It doesn't seem to be bleeding. Maybe we should try to clean it or something. Does it hurt worse now?"
"No, not really," Adam says. "Getting them open hurt more."
Tommy moves upwards on the bed and rests his hand in Adam's hair. "You're doing great," he says.
The only trouble is that now Tommy has no idea what to do to help Adam. Should he get some medicine or clean the wound — the wound he can't even really make out.
"I'm gonna get you some water," he says instead.
"Okay," says Adam. "Don't — don't be gone for long, okay."
"Of course not," Tommy says, and hurries downstairs to get a glass of water and gather his thoughts. The facts are: Adam is hurt; the part of him that is hurt is magical, and less than ten people even know there is that part to him.
Since Tommy has no idea what to do about/with the second fact, but needs to eliminate the first one, he — he needs to ask someone for help. He gets a glass and fills it with the special bottled water that Adam likes and practically runs back upstairs.
Drinking proves to be a bit difficult, given Adam's position and his hesitance to move, but they manage. Tommy sits next to Adam on the bed, and absent-mindedly pets Adam's hair.
"So, Lane drove you home," Tommy says. "Why didn't she walk with you to the door?"
"She thought I was fine," Adam says. "I told her I was fine, and it was late, anyway."
"You were in a car crash," Tommy says indignantly, stills his hand. "She believed you?"
"I told her you were waiting for me," Adam says, and nudges Tommy's hand with his head. Tommy goes back to carding through Adam's hair.
"Why didn't you tell her your wings were hurt? I thought she knew about them."
"She does. I was going to. I forgot." Adam's back to speaking in short sentences, and that's not really a good sign, but it could also mean he's just getting tired — which, well, duh.
"How could you have forgotten," Tommy scoffs. He looks closer at Adam, sees his eyes are closed, but his forehead is creased, like he's still in pain.
"Do you want aspirin or something," Tommy asks.
"No, I'm fine," Adam says, buries his face deeper into the pillow.
Tommy can see his right wing twitching lightly, but the left one stays put.
"You're not," Tommy says.
"'Least I'm home," Adam whispers. "Things will be better in the morning."
"You can't fall asleep like this; it'll kill your neck. And you'll try to turn in your sleep, and that won't end well."
"But I'm so tired," Adam says, and finally opens his eyes to look at Tommy. Tommy leans down and kisses his forehead, then moves down to his nose. Adam always likes it when Tommy kisses his nose. Tommy opens his eyes just in time to see Adam's wings flutter involuntarily and Adam whimpers with pain.
"We need to do something about this," Tommy says.
"I'm sorry if I can't help my reaction when you kiss my nose," Adam says.
Tommy laughs, and feels a little lighter after that. "Okay, you rest. Sleep. I'll call someone, okay."
Adam just hums and reaches for Tommy's hand, squeezes it. Adam rests his head on the pillow again and Tommy leans down to kiss his hair.
Tommy slips out of the room and goes to get his cellphone. He finds it on the couch downstairs and thinks about just making the call from there, but he doesn't want to be too far away if Adam needs him. So he stalks back upstairs and sits down next to the door that leads to Adam's bedroom. He doesn't want to go in because he thinks Adam should probably get some rest and he's not completely sure how Adam would feel about making this call. Then he realises that Adam wouldn't mind at all and it's only him who's nervous about it. And he has no idea why.
He calls Brad, and takes a deep breath as he waits for him to pick up.
"Hey, darling," Brad says from the other side of the line; he sounds like he's out in a club somewhere. "Something wrong?"
"Um, why do you —" Tommy stammers.
"Well, it's after midnight and I know you're over at Adam's, so I don't think you'd call me if it wasn't some sort of emergency," Brad says lightly. "Now, what do you require my assistance with?"
"It's Adam's wings," Tommy blurts out. "He was in a car accident."
"He's —"
"He's fine, he's okay, but — His left wing is hurt and I don't know what to do. I know you know about them, and I was just hoping —"
"Okay," Brad says. "Okay. I can't really talk in here and I'll have to make a few calls. I'll get back to you, right. Hang on tight."
"Yeah, okay," Tommy says, and leans his head back against the wall after Brad ends the call. He gets up and quietly opens the door to check up on Adam. He seems to be asleep, but his body's not really relaxed, and from this angle, the wing looks even worse. Tommy creeps closer and takes another look at it. It's lying completely still, not moving, but Tommy can see the tension in Adam's back, trying to keep it that way. Tommy figures it's hurting more than Adam's letting on, but at the same time, he can't figure out why he'd have to keep it so still, when usually relaxing will help with the pain. Maybe it's a magic thing.
Tommy's phone rings and he slips out quickly, hoping it didn't wake Adam.
"Okay, I'm sending someone over," Brad says the second Tommy picks up.
"But — They won't —"
"No, sheesh, of course not," Brad scoffs. "She's a professional."
"Oh," Tommy says. "Okay. Thanks."
"Tell him to get better fast, okay," Brad says, stern.
"Yeah, sure."
Tommy slips the phone into his pocket and goes back into Adam's bedroom. He kneels down next to the bed and brushes Adam's hair back from his face, whispers, "Hey."
Adam opens his eyes, bleary, and smiles at Tommy.
"I called Brad. He said he was sending someone over to help," Tommy tells him.
"Who?" Adam asks, confused.
"I don't know," Tommy says, and shrugs. "He said she was a professional."
"Okay," Adam says quietly, and closes his eyes.
"He told you to get better fast," Tommy adds.
Adam smiles softly, and the doorbell rings.
"That was fast," Tommy mutters to himself. He trails his fingers over Adam's cheek, presses a kiss to it. "Be right back."
He walks quietly to the door, throwing a glance back at Adam's resting form, but rushes downstairs once he's out of the room. Waiting outside, Tommy finds a tall young woman, with red hair. She has green eye make-up, and she doesn't look older than twenty-five.
"Um, hi," Tommy says. "How did you get here so fast?"
She merely raises an eyebrow at him.
"I mean, hi, I'm Tommy," Tommy says, apologetically.
"Amy," she says, and smiles. It's a comforting smile, Tommy didn't really expect it. She has a faint accent, which sounds Scottish. "Pleasure to meet you. Where is he?"
"Um, upstairs," Tommy says, and opens the door wider. "Come in."
She steps into the hallway, and brushes past him, heading straight for the stairs. Tommy shuts the door and hurries after her. She appears to be completely at home in a house she's never been to before. At least Tommy thinks she's never been here before, but who knows. She stops in the upstairs hallway, and seems to contemplate things. Then she points to the door to Adam's bedroom. "This one."
"Yeah," Tommy says. "Have you been here before?"
"No," she says, and quietly opens the door.
Tommy follows her inside. She's stopped in the middle of the room, and Tommy walks past her, to Adam. "Hey," he says, crouching next to Adam. "Meet Amy."
Adam opens his eyes and tries to turn, but then hisses in pain. "Shh," Tommy says, and runs his hand over Adam's left shoulder. "Relax." He glances back at Amy, and sees she's placed a bag that he failed to notice before on the nightstand. She steps closer to the bed and smiles at Adam.
"Hi, lovely to meet you," she says.
Adam smiles back, and nods. "Likewise. I'm sorry I can't be a better host tonight."
"Yes, well," she says, and the smile has disappeared from her face, replaced by a look that clearly means business. "I was informed that there was a car accident, correct?"
"Yeah," Adam says. "Brad said that you were a professional?"
"Indeed," she says. Tommy sees Adam open his mouth to say something, but she doesn't give him the chance to. "Please try to relax, I'm going to examine the wound."
Adam nods and closes his eyes, as she steps closer to the wing. Tommy can't really see what she's doing with it, from here, but he places his hand on Adam's, strokes it soothingly. She doesn't take long, and when she stands up straighter, Tommy can see she looks relieved. "The wound's not deep," she says.
"So he's going to be fine?" Tommy asks, because it's not like he even allowed himself to think of another option, but it's still good to be sure.
"Yes," she says, and grabs her bag. Tommy's about to tell her she can't just leave, but before he can open his mouth, she's pulled out two small jars and something that looks like a brush.
"Is that, like, medicine?" Tommy asks, and stands up to get a better look. Adam sighs softly, he looks more tired than before, but relaxed. Tommy doesn't want to let go of his hand, but Amy raises her head and looks straight at him, as if demanding his full attention. Tommy steps closer to her, and she hands him one of the jars.
"Look," she says. "Usually I'd apply these myself, but I'm a bit busy tonight with it being a full moon, and all. I trust you can handle it."
"It's — glitter?" Tommy asks, once he's gotten a closer look at whatever's inside the jar.
"They're wings," Amy says, like he's slow or something. "You use the brush. Gently spread it over the wound. It might sting a little at first, but it will pass."
Tommy stares at the jar in his hand, and thinks that this is something he really didn't know to expect. At the same time, though, it's quite fascinating. Magic's weird. He'd probably spend more time thinking about it, if Adam wasn't/weren't? hurt. He raises his head, and she smiles at him. "You'll do fine."
He nods and she hands him the other bottle.
"And this is for his back," she says. It looks just like regular salve. "You can use your hands for these, it's to make the carrying of a damaged wing more bearable, seeing as he won't be folding them for a little while at least."
"Right," Tommy says, and places the jars and brush on the nightstand.
"So," Amy says. "Both of these, once every seven hours, until the pain stops. Shouldn't take long, a day or two."
She grabs her bag and turns to go. "Thank you," Tommy says. "Um, should I show you the way out?"
Amy stops on the doorstep and looks back at him. "You're welcome," she says, and her gaze settles on Adam. "I can see myself out. Take care."
And just like that, she's gone. Tommy hears the sound of her boots on the stairs, and soon after, the door clicks. Tommy shakes his head, and turns to Adam.
"That was interesting," he says, and leans down to kiss Adam's brow.
Adam slowly opens his eyes and nods. "She was nice."
"Yeah," Tommy says, and smiles at him. "And she gave me some medicine to use, so I guess we should do that. If you're up for it."
Adam clumsily raises his hand, and tugs Tommy closer to him. Tommy takes the hint, and leans forward to kiss Adam. It starts soft and sweet, and stays that way. Just lazy, languid kissing, Tommy concentrating on Adam's bottom lip, because he can never, ever resist it. Tommy feels himself relax after all the craziness and worry. But when Adam tries to tighten his grip on Tommy's arm, Tommy can see him wince in pain.
"Shh," Tommy murmurs, and presses a kiss to Adam's forehead. "I should put apply the medicine, it will make you feel better."
Adam sighs, and nods, settling back down to the pillow.
Tommy stands up and fetches the jar. "Hey, want to see it?" he asks. "It looks like glitter."
Adam chuckles softly, when Tommy shows it to him. "That should to the trick," he says.
Tommy climbs on the bed and settles himself over Adam's legs. He dips the brush into the glittery substance and brings it down on Adam's wing.
---
It hurts, at first, and Adam tries not to whimper too much, 'cause he doesn't want Tommy to feel bad about it. Tommy just makes soothing noises and runs a hand down Adam's back at the same time as he applies the glitter. Adam's mind blanks out after a while, and he starts thinking about how appropriate it is that his wing's getting healed by glitter. He'd try to come up with a joke about it if he wasn't so tired.
The pains seems to be lessening, though, and Adam sighs with content when Tommy tells him he's going to put this bottle aside and apply the salve to Adam's back now.
"You doing okay?" Tommy asks, and Adam merely hums as a response.
Tommy's hands feel so amazing on his back. They always do, whether they're giving Adam a massage after a long and exhausting day or teasing and tickling his shoulder blades, waiting for the wings to appear. Adam falls asleep, thinking about how lucky he is to have Tommy's hands all to himself.
When he comes to, it's dark in the room, and Tommy's lying next to him. Adam can still feel the soreness in his wing, but the muscles in his back aren't as keen on tensing up as they were before. Tommy's face is turned towards Adam, and his eyes are closed, mouth slightly agape, like he usually sleeps. Adam eases himself a little closer to him — a feat, considering he didn't even want to think about moving earlier that night — and throws his arm over Tommy's stomach. He closes his eyes and goes back to sleep.
It's morning when he wakes up for the second time. Tommy's still next to him, but his eyes are open now, and there's a soft smile on his lips.
"Hi," he says, when he sees Adam's awake.
Adam leans in for a kiss. "Hey," he murmurs into Tommy's mouth, and deepens the kiss.
"How are you?" Tommy asks, when they come up for air.
"I'm good," Adam says, and smiles. "Hurts a little, but I'm good. Thanks to you." He runs his fingers over Tommy's torso, tickling a little, teasing.
Tommy squirms and looks away from Adam. "So, how does Brad even know these people?" he says. "Does he know magic?"
"It's Brad," Adam says, because that really does explain everything, when it comes to Brad. "And you're the one who called him for help."
"Yeah," Tommy says, still not looking at Adam. "I figured, if there's anyone who can help, it's Brad, right. Plus, he'd do anything."
"So would you," Adam says, and reaches his hand up to gently turn Tommy's face, catching his eyes.
The look in Tommy's eyes is serious, and Adam's breath stops for a second. "Yeah," Tommy says. "I would."
Adam smiles and presses a kiss to Tommy's lips. "Good," he says, and wriggles his eyebrows, breaking the tension. "And I'm fine. And it wasn't such a big deal."
Tommy shakes his head, and smiles fondly. "You don't even know what you're talking about, man. You didn't see your wing. Which reminds me, I should get the medicine, it's been almost seven hours."
He moves to get up, but Adam grabs his hand. "Hold on," he says. "I was — thinking. And I probably won't be able to form coherent sentences when you have your hands on my back again, so, just. Wait."
"Okay," Tommy says, warily, and settles back into the pillows. "What were you thinking about?"
Adam takes a deep breath, and just looks at Tommy. His hair is astray, his eyeliner is all smudged up, and there's faint stubble on his face. He looks beautiful, here, in Adam's bed, and Adam really doesn't want him to go. Even though he knows that Tommy won't leave now, especially 'cause he's hurt, he'll still go back to his own apartment after a few days, and then Adam will get home and there'll be no Tommy waiting for him. Sure, he can go and see him, or Tommy can come over, or they can go out, and it's not like they don't see each other enough during rehearsals, and then there'll be tour, and they'll see each other all the time, but — Adam wants more. And he's pretty sure he wants it now.
"Move in with me," he says, and then realises he should have probably worked his way up to that request.
Tommy just stares at him. It's one of those times when Adam can't read his face and doesn't know what Tommy's thinking, and that always makes him nervous, but this time, the stakes are higher than usual.
"You want me to —"
"Only if you want to," Adam hurries to explain. "I was just — I don't expect you to — I was just thinking. That it'd be nice." He looks down at the bed, then glances up at Tommy, and realises just how much he's hoping that Tommy'll say yes. "I'm sorry if I'm going too fast. I just —"
"Okay," Tommy says, and Adam stops in the middle of a sentence to gape at him and try to stop the hope from gathering deep inside his belly.
"You —"
"Yeah," Tommy says, and a small smile appears on his face. "I want that. I want to move in with you."
"Oh," Adam says, and tries to force down his grin, 'cause he's pretty sure it might reach manic proportions. "Okay."
Tommy grins right back at him and tugs him down into a kiss. "But," he says, and pulls back after a minute, "I really do have to take care of your wing, now."
Adam laughs and rests his head on Tommy's chest. "Now, see, what would I do without you."
"Guess it's good you won't have to find out," Tommy says, and kisses the top of Adam's head.