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There was no doubt that he cared about you. Even when he tried to hide his feelings behind a cracked armor composed of anger and aggression the soft inner feelings bled through brightly and almost burned you. There was no need to manipulate him or anyone around him to get him to confess. You built him a small robotic version of his lusus and brought him flowers and he was soon pinning you to the wall and kissing you roughly.
Karkat wasn’t hard to please. He like you worried about feelings being mutual and your true self scaring him away but you soon learned as much as you hated who you were, he hated who he was just as much. You spent many hours watching movies with him and listening to him explain relationship dynamics both troll and how he saw human. He listened to your input and opinions, sometimes agreeing and sometimes debating points. Even when he saw fit to growl, storm off, or huff about a disagreement he rarely stayed away for long. He never pushed you away if you made the move to make up first. You never went to bed angry with each other.
He’s fascinated with your work with machines and you’ve built him several more robots in addition to the one he calls robo mini crabdad bot or just crabbot for short. You built him a robotic cat that actually purrs and can heat up in his lap or near him when he sleeps. You also build another robot that looks just like you, not to spar with him, but to protect and keep him company in your absence. He’s grown to love the vibrating massage feature. The hickie he leaves on your throat and the memories of the grinding against you make you wonder how he’d take to you adding more features to the Dirkbot.
You aren’t sure what to make of the flowers or candy at first but soon you remember who you are dealing with. Flowers and candy are a human romance in media staple. You’re quick to put them in vases and lay your head in his lap while you watch yet another move and he feeds you chocolates. He even eats the ones you don’t like and you don’t care when you can taste them in his mouth when you kiss after. He makes coconut cream palatable for you somehow. You think it might be the promise of his body being over yours later as he pins you to the bed. There are few people you would trust, much less allow and want to allow, to handle you so. He’s made it worthwhile every time and seeing him so in charge is just thrilling. The aftercare is heavenly. You’re warm putty in his arms every time and his gentle kisses on your face and warm whispered loving words send chills through you and make you want to beg to know how to keep him. But you already do know how. Karkat Vantas has wanted no more and now less than the love you’ve been giving him and you’re okay with him wanting you.
You’ve both seen each other at your worsts and it didn’t change a thing. You still both hate yourselves deeply but you can’t help liking yourself a bit more when he’s naming the things he loves about you. You’ll get him back with his own turn and revel in how he flushes when you strike a deep nerve and claim to adore something he’s twisted in his head. But that’s how you two are and he won’t try to call you a liar. You’ve gotten past the point that your feelings are called into question at every moment. You both spend far too much time reminding each other that you care to question it at any time other than your worst bouts of self-hate. Only now when it comes on you aren’t alone. Whether it be his arms around you and his lips at your ear, or you pulling him into your lap, you see each other through the bad times. You never ever go to bed filled with anything but love and at ease.
