Chapter Text
11 Months Later | The RECNY Ball
“Are you sure we can’t take Vesper with us?” Roman pleaded, having unwillingly put her to bed twenty minutes earlier, those big brown eyes having guilt tripped him the entire time.
“No, especially not tonight, she’ll make a scene and I’m not sitting with her on my lap all night. Plus it wouldn’t be appropriate,” Gerri insisted, trying to get her third earring into its piercing as she stood in front of the mirror, catching Roman’s reflection behind her. “She’ll be fine here, Rome, you worry too much,” she reminded him with a smile, “It’s past her bedtime anyway, she’ll not even know we’re gone.”
Roman folded his arms, the cuffs of his shirt still needing to be done up. “We can’t leave her all alone, what sort of parents would that make us, Ger?” he asked defensively. Roman held up the little toy tortoise in his hand that Vesper had been playing with earlier.
“Maddie is coming over later anyway, she’s staying the night. We’re taking Vesper to brunch with us tomorrow,” Gerri tried to reason with him, but he was stubborn when it came to anything to do with Vesper. “But Gerri,” Roman pleaded again, wrapping his arms around her waist as he looked at her through the mirror.
“Roman, she’s a dog,” Gerri dead-panned.
“She’s a 12 week old puppy, she’s just a baby,” he protested.
“She will be fine. I promise,” Gerri assured him, taking in their reflection in the full length mirror before nodding her head towards the open De Beers box sitting on the nearby dresser. “Can you do the honours?” she asked, as she thought back not for the first time of the night that he had given her that necklace. Roman tilted the box towards him, careful with the clasp as he lifted the necklace and stepped around Gerri to put it on her. “You know, this really was worth the eye-watering sums I paid for it,” he whistled, fingers focusing on doing up the clasp correctly. He had fallen foul to it more than once.
“I don’t usually wear it with so much clothing,” Gerri agreed, putting on her usual corporate voice, the one he enjoyed listening to on the rare occasion when she was working from home. Of the last four times Gerri had worn that necklace, lingerie was the most she had worn with it. If Princess Margaret could wear nothing but diamonds in a bathtub, then so could she.
“Don’t worry. I plan to fix that later,” he announced, dropping a kiss on the curve of her neck before he stepped back. The dress was her signature colour, emerald green, with a square neckline that reminded him of something Bette Davis might wear in one of those old black and white movies. “You’re incorrigible,” Gerri scolded as she looked at him through the reflection of the mirror, his hands resting for a moment on her waist.
“Hold on. I need to ask Siri what that means,” he teased, dodging out of the way as she turned around to tap him on the arm. “Just let me finish getting ready, I’ll be out in a few minutes,” she insisted, turning around to watch him gather up his jacket and head out to the lounge so she could apply her perfume and one last coat of mascara.
When she finished five minutes later, Roman was exactly where she expected him to be. Sitting on the floor next to Vesper’s oversized gingham dog bed in the lounge. “Roman,” Gerri warned, stopping near the door as she tucked her clutch bag under her arm, checking the backs of her earrings. “Vesper will be fine. You have that puppy cam on your phone. She won’t even notice us gone,” she reminded him as she headed towards the door, taking a second to check her outfit in the hallway mirror.
“ Fine, but we’re going to the Hamptons early tomorrow,” he compromised, sounding like a child trying to debate their bedtime. “You won’t hear me complaining about that,” she agreed, though she doubted anyone at Waystar would be doing any actual work the next day.
The Hamptons house had been Roman’s idea but something that hadn’t taken much convincing on Gerri’s part. While the penthouse apartment was still technically Gerri’s, although Roman lived there full time after he gave his apartment over to Madeline when she finally decided to set down roots, the Hamptons house was theirs. Even if it was Gerri’s name on the deed. Roman had paid for the furniture and interior design. The nearest thing they could agree on to a 50/50 split.
They made a point of spending their weekends there with Gerri taking advantage of Matsson’s virtually compulsory ‘work from home on Fridays’ policy. More often than not at least one of the girls spent part of the weekend there, but they made a point of always having one weekend alone there. If you didn’t include Vesper.
“Freddie, how are you?” Gerri greeted the British chauffeur as he opened the car door for her. “You look lovely, Ms. Kellman,” he acknowledged with a smile, helping tuck her dress in as Roman got into the car from the other side. “Is he ever going to just call me Gerri?” she asked, turning to look at him as he got in next to her. “That’s the Brits for you,” he joked before Fredrick got back into the driver’s seat and the car pulled away from the apartment.
That RECNY ball was a landmark occasion in itself, regardless of the guest list. The first without Logan Roy at the helm with a greater family focus, moving away from its reliance on the Waystar Royco name and serving its greater function as a charitable event. The press attention felt a little more intense than the year before, but Gerri felt considerably more comfortable on the red carpet this year than the year before.
Waiting at the end of the photocall were two former assistants, martinis in hand. “So is that why I couldn’t find you all afternoon?” Roman asked as he took in Emily’s fresh spray tan. “Be glad I didn’t charge it to the company card after all the reshoots you made us do this week,” she responded, her tone making it clear that her boss was on shaky ground with her.
“Oh, Nancy looks lovely,” Gerri greeted and Roman stepped out of the way to clear the path for Gerri to hug her former second assistant. While his former assistant still worked for him, Nancy was flourishing in her new role at Conde Nast. “I see the necklace is getting another night out,” Nancy teased, admiring the way the diamonds caught the light at just the right angle to sparkle against Gerri’s skin. “Yes, well, I thought it was a good excuse,” Gerri replied, hand on her former assistant’s arm as they laughed together.
“I thought you might need this,” Nick announced as he clears his throat, finding his usual spot next to his boss. Roman had taken both of his assistants with him when he left Waystar and started his own production company. Nick and Emily were a Senior Producer and Production Coordinator accordingly. Though Emily’s unofficial job title was “Roman’s Deputy”.
“Nicky, hi,” Gerri greeted, not sure if she felt happier to see him or the martini in his hand. “Hey, Gerri, sorry we kept him late on the set today,” Nick acknowledged as he gave her the first martini before turning to his boss. Roman nodded his thanks as he took the martini glass that Nick was holding outstretched towards him. He tried to hide his yawn by turning to the side, spotting a familiar head of red hair across the room.
So Shiv had shown up after all. They had texted a little back and forth, rubbed shoulders at enough events to give the illusion of them being on speaking terms, but they were still working through everything. At least she had shown up though, but Roman knew that was probably for Tom’s benefit.
“When was the last time you slept through the night?” Nick asked in a slightly irritating ‘ I told you so’ tone that he inherited from Nancy as he guided the group towards their designated table in the centre of the room. “When did we start shooting this movie?” Roman mumbled against the rim of his martini glass. “Touche,” Nick replied, glancing over to where Nancy and Gerri were standing off to the side in deep conversation with each other. Those two seemed to be even closer now than they had been when Nancy was working for her.
“There’s only another two weeks, then it’s done,” Roman said, more to himself than to his junior executive. The first production was always going to be the hardest but they had somehow managed to run it like a tight ship, after all, they had a rather important deadline. “You’re all cutting it a bit fine,” Nick warned, having woken up more than once in fear that the filming of the studio’s debut movie wouldn’t wrap up in time.
“So long as Lily doesn’t go into labour while Elise is on set or something,” Roman reminded him, having already had that horrible thought on more than one occasion. There was a small commotion that started near the entrance that caught Nick’s attention as he nudged his boss’ arm. “Speaking of the future Senator for the State of New York,” Nick observed, smirking behind his martini glass.
“You think she’s serious about that?” Roman groaned, thinking that was the last thing any of them needed. Elise had said it in a way Roman had assumed was a throwaway comment. Until that throwaway comment happened on three more occasions and suddenly it hadn’t felt like a hypothetical anymore.
“Oh, deadly serious,” Nick responded with a firm nod. “So anyone with money can be a politician?” Roman asked, though the irony of someone in his position asking that wasn’t lost on him. “Go for a joint ticket. Elise as POTUS and you as VP. The campaign slogans write themselves,” Nick suggested, a seriousness to his tone that made his boss raise his eyebrows.
“What dystopian shit have you been watching?” Roman choked on his martini at the idea. “Listen, I’ve seen like three episodes of The West Wing, I know how presidential campaigns work. I’ll be your Chief of Staff,” Nick proposed in a matter-of-fact tone. “And what? Nancy will be our C.J.?” Roman questioned, though his words seemed to have summoned his partner’s favourite former assistant.
“Action stations,” Nancy whispered as she stepped up behind the pair, nodding her head towards the commotion that appeared to be unfolding near the door. “Ger’s away to chat to Frank about something, but that has to be Lily and Elise,” she explained when she caught Roman’s fleeting glance to her side, as though expecting the older blonde to be standing there.
“Nanc, can you do the jackal?” he asked.
“The what now?” she leaned forward, looking at him as if he had suddenly gone mad.
“Never mind,” Roman shook his head.
A few seconds later Elise emerged from the crowd, parting them like the red sea as she guided Lily slowly into the room. There was something ethereal about the younger blonde and Roman wasn’t sure if it was the diamond stars in her hair or the shock at her appearance that seemed to be attracting every eye towards their little corner of the room. Not even Gerri had been expecting Lily to show up, but her appearance was for the sake of showing a united front.
Even if she was nine months pregnant in heels.
“Nancy, darling, you look spectacular. Please tell me you raided that from the closet?” Elise greeted the only person in the group who didn’t work for Roy-Ward Studios. “Guilty as charged,” Nancy chuckled, looking down at the pink strapless tulle Monique Lhuillier dress she had swiped from the Vogue closet.
“Don’t I get a hug and a kiss?” Roman pouted from the side of the little group. “I see you enough as it is,” Elise complained, though she still stepped forward to hug her business partner.
“Hello, Rome,” Lily greeted as her wife finished hugging her mother’s partner, taking her place as she stepped towards him. It’s a half hug at best, Lily leaning across to wrap her arms around Roman’s shoulder, tilting her bump away.
“How’s Roman Junior doing?” he joked, his hand on Lily’s arm as he kept her close. “We are not naming the baby after you,” Elise scoffed, making it evident that this was not the first time the baby name had been suggested. “He or she is getting very snug in there, whatever their name is going to be,” Lily replied, her left hand resting on the top of her bump as she visibly shifted uncomfortably in her gown.
“Bad news, I think Karl is already drunk,” Gerri announced as she arrived back to the little huddle that the group had formed off to the side of their table in the centre of the ballroom. It took her a second to realise their little group had expanded.
“You’re in heels?” Gerri cried, spotting the distinctive pointed toe of Lily’s signature Louboutins peeking out from under the hem of her dress. “Hello to you too, Mother,” Lily greeted, slowly lowering herself down onto the seat at the centre of the table, Nancy and Emily stepping forward to help her.
“ She’ll probably give birth in heels,” Elise sniggered, sipping on her martini as Lily glared out of the corner of her eye. “I need one of you to deliver a martini to the delivery room after I push this thing out,” she announced, having now gone almost a year without her beloved elixir. “Martini IV, got it,” Roman noted as he gave Emily a pointed look that told her she would be responsible for somehow making that happen.
“No, absolutely not. You need to be getting your fluids into you. I’ve got a meal service sorted out for the first few weeks,” Gerri announced, having taken it upon herself to cram 30 years worth of missed parenting opportunities into the duration of Lily’s pregnancy.
“Geez. You’re such a control freak,” Roman smirked as he walked around the table towards Gerri. “I prefer the term ‘control connoisseur ’, if you don’t mind,” she corrected him. “And I prefer you with your dancing shoes on,” he declared, taking her hand in his as he turned towards the dance floor where several other couples were already dancing to the jazz music being played by the orchestra.
“No, Roman,” Gerri tried to protest but he had already gotten them halfway to the dance floor. “Come on, I am not having us upstaged by Tom bleeding Wambsgans,” he declared, having spotted Tom on the dance floor trying to dance with several of the other executives in some awkward little group circle.
While Tom was on the dancefloor, Shiv had been waiting for the right moment to approach. It came a few minutes later when Elise, Emily, Nick, and Nancy had gone to circulate around the room, leaving Lily alone to rest at their table. “Lily, hi,” Shiv greeted, lightly touching the woman’s arm, having realised that Lily was trying not to fall asleep.
“Hi, Shiv,” Lily said, clearly surprised by the other woman approaching her. “I would get up and hug you but I just sat down,” she explained with a heavy sigh, though she nodded her head to the empty seat next to her. “I can’t believe you’re actually here,” Shiv acknowledged, taking the seat as he glanced over towards the dancefloor where Roman and Gerri were swaying back and forth.
“I seriously needed to get out of the house, I’m just in complete nesting mode right now. I ended up alphabetising all the books in Selina’s bedroom yesterday out of sheer boredom,” Lily revealed, taking one of the olives out of one of the little white bowls in the centre of the table. The olive took away the edge of needing a martini - even if Elise didn’t appreciate the 2am runs to the store to refill the mini fridge in their master bedroom. Someone, probably Alice, had seen to it that there was a bowl of olives on their table for her.
“I ended up reorganising the entire kitchen the night before Rose was born, I think I was restocking the pickles when my water broke,” Shiv sympathised with her. “I’d take that at this stage,” Lily sighed, twirling the cocktail ring she was wearing on her left hand in place of her usual engagement and wedding bands.
She was too tired to beat around the bush much longer.
“Have you spoken to Roman yet?” Lily asked her unlikely companion. “I’m making a slow walk in his direction,” Shiv admitted, though Lily thought it almost looked as though the other woman was scared of approaching him. Things were so strange now and it seemed as if Roman and Shiv were entirely different people than who they had been a year ago.
“Listen, Shiv,” Lily started, shifting uncomfortably in her seat as she decided this was her one chance to do something helpful for her mother. “If you’re going to give me a lecture, we’re both too sleep-deprived for that, Lily,” Shiv warned, slightly defensively as she sat up straighter. “I’m not - but Roman’s changed a lot in the last year. I never thought it would happen but it has and I don’t think you should miss out on being part of each other’s lives right now,” Lily decided, a certain wisdom in her voice that told Shiv she was speaking from personal experience. The younger blonde had lost valuable years with her mother that she was never going to get back - and she didn’t want Shiv to make the same mistake with her brother.
“Well, do you think they’re going all the way?” Shiv asked.
“Marriage?” Lily questioned.
“Yep,” Shiv nodded.
“My mother won’t be a Roy,” Lily declared confidently, though she imagined the idea of it would probably have been enough to put Logan in an early grave. Not that any of them had seen much of him in the past year. “Roman could always become a Kellman,” Shiv suggested, knowing nothing would surprise her now.
“I don’t think they need a piece of paper to make it official,” Lily shook her head, having no idea what her mother’s thoughts on a potential second marriage were. “Fair. They haven’t done anything by the book,” Shiv agreed, having heard that Roman practically moved in with Gerri after their first week of dating.
“Come and see them in the Hamptons house,” Lily suggested, suspecting it would be up to her to bring the two youngest Roy siblings back together. She had seen Connor around, after all, he was a fairly frequent visitor to the Hamptons house, but Kendall was still out of the picture. “So, it’s true they’ve bought a house there?” Shiv asked, having only kept up with her brother for the last year through the gossip of the grapevine.
“We all spend a week or two there a month, including Maddie. Though Mom and Roman tend to head out there on a Thursday night and come back Sunday afternoon,” Lily explained, knowing it was a routine that was firmly in place for them, except on the rare occasion where Gerri had to travel for work. “Once this one serves his or her eviction notice, I’ll arrange something,” she decided, suspecting getting them out of New York and the constant reminders of their father might help make the reconciliation easier. “I’d like that,” Shiv agreed, deciding it was now time to turn a new page.
Lily looked towards the ballroom, spotting where her mother was flanked by a group of executives, Nancy hovering by her side as the faithful advisor. Roman had somehow found himself stuck in the middle of a group of journalists who were eagerly pointing their iPhones in his face. “Oh, god. I gotta go save Roman. Give me a hand, would you?” she pleaded, hand outstretched towards Shiv as she tried to push herself up from the chair.
Roman caught sight of her as she slowly walked across the room towards him. There was something unnerving about seeing Lily like this. Her hair was shorter now, almost always tucked back into a French twist to keep it out of her face. Gerri’s signature hairstyle. She looked more like her mother than he thought possible. It was an echo of a life Roman could never experience.
It wasn’t that he wanted kids. Fuck no. Absolutely not.
But Roman Roy had never been denied anything in his life - whether or not he wanted it.
And it was a nice idea. A fanciful, impossible one. But a nice idea all the same.
“If you would excuse me,” he said, acknowledging the journalists with a nod as he walked towards Gerri’s eldest daughter. “Thanks for the rescue,” Roman greeted her as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and turned them back towards the table. “I could tell you needed it,” Lily smiled, grateful of the slower pace he was taking with her. “Let’s get you back to your seat,” Roman insisted, stepping forward as he glared at their fellow guests until they parted like the Red Sea.
“You’re still good to take Selina right when D-day finally hits?” she asked, although they had already gone over the plans a dozen times before. Lily was convinced her mother had scheduled it all out like one of her General Counsel briefs. “Yeah, Emily has cleared my diary. As soon as the baby drops, I’m off any productions for a week and Ger will be around the whole time,” he reminded her. Gerri planned to unofficially cash in the maternity leave she had failed to take with either of her daughters for an ‘extended vacation’ once the baby was born.
“Roman, I’d like my child back in one piece when I get out of the hospital,” Lily said in a pointed tone that made her sound a little too much like her mother. It wasn’t unusual for Roman and Gerri to have Selina for the weekend, but it would be different this time.
“She’s more likely to break me than the other way around,” Roman joked with a smirk. After all, Selina had been the reason why he had broken his arm in the summer chasing her around the pool. It had been rather an unforgettable first weekend at the Hamptons house.
Lily held onto his arm as she lowered herself back down onto her seat, signalling for him to take the seat next to her. “And…you’ll keep an eye on Mom, won’t you?” she asked cautiously, not afraid to admit she was concerned about her mother as her eldest daughter. “Ger will be fine, Lils. Don’t worry,” Roman tried to wave off her concern as he sat down next to her.
“I just…I’m aware of the fact this is going to bring up memories and not all of them might be easy ones,” Lily confessed, having had more than one heart-to-heart with her mother during her pregnancy about their troubled years and some of the regrets the older woman had. “I get it, Lils,” he said as he cleared his throat. Roman could still see the silent tears that rolled down Gerri’s face the day she had found out about Selina. She had cried more times than she would probably admit over it, but those were becoming less frequent now.
Another voice sounded from the other side of the table. “Roman,” Alice called as she walked towards them. “Alice!” he acknowledged as he got up to greet Gerri’s former first assistant with a hug. “Karolina asked me to check if you wanted to make a few remarks on behalf of the family,” she explained, stopping to say hello to Lily.
Alice had gotten her long overdue promotion to become Karolina’s number two as the Deputy Executive for Press Relations.
“Can I?” Roman asked, having not planned on doing anything other than eating, drinking, and dancing with Gerri. “If you’d like,” Alice agreed with a knowing smile. “I don’t have anything prepared,” he reminded her, unsure how he was meant to give a speech in a few minutes without anything in his back pocket to use.
Out of Alice’s clutch bag appeared five little pink note cards, Gerri’s distinctive cursive handwriting written across the thin lines. “Are you still conspiring with your former boss?” Roman asked, taking the note cards as he started to scan over their contents. “I wouldn’t say ‘conspiring’ exactly,” Alice shrugged as she waved her hand at Roman for him to follow her towards the stage to get ready to give his impromptu remarks.
Roman had enough time to memorise a few lines from the little note cards before he was introduced on stage. It was a less eventful speech than the one he had given the year before, but it focused on the family’s commitment to continuing the RECNY fund for the years going forward. He scanned the crowd for Gerri, but only her empty seat next to his at their table. It took him a minute to realise she was standing off to the side of the stage watching him.
“Did I do okay?” Roman asked as the crowd clapped him off the stage before the charity auction started. Gerri didn’t have to tell the nice lie that time. “You did better than okay,” she smiled, stepping forward to kiss Roman’s cheek, smirking as she caught sight of the lipstick mark she’s left behind. Guerlain Rouge G No. 214. Her signature shade.
He only had one question left to ask.
“Gerri?” Roman asked as they walked down the steps off the stage. “Yeah?’ she paused, the auction getting underway as the guests started to bid on lots. “Can we go home?” he pleaded, having reached his limit of corporate niceness for the day. “Freddie’s already waiting outside,” Gerri smiled, having texted him mid-way through Roman’s speech. Elise and Lily had already slipped out the back entrance and there was no need for them to stay around for the rest of the event.
Another question rolled around his head as they headed back home that night.
TWO WEEKS LATER
“Elise!”
“ELISE!”
Roman looked up from his laptop as he heard Emily and Nick’s voices coming down the hallways towards them. “What the fuck?” he asked, looking across the table at Elise who was finalising circulation plans for the production. The door behind them opened as Emily practically fell through it, holding her phone in her hand.
“You gotta go,” she announced as Nick suddenly appeared beside her with Elise’s black trench coat in hand. “We’re in a meeting, Em,” Elise pointed out, the sleep deprivation making her tone a little more irritated as she turned to look at the younger woman before the penny dropped. “Hold on,” she paused as her eyes bulged in her head.
“What? Shit, fuck, is this it?” Roman asked, his hands clamping up as he stood from the conference table. “Must be,” Elise gulped, hands shaking as she tried to pick up her phone from the table, finally seeing the stack of messages from Lily and Maddie that her ‘do not disturb’ mode had muted.
“Fredrick is downstairs waiting on you, he’s going to take you straight there,” Emily explained as she finished gathering up Elise’s paperwork and laptop, unceremoniously dumping them into the woman’s tote bag. “I’ve already got your assistant to clear your calendar,” Nick added as he held open the door for them.
“Ger has Selina, Freddie dropped her over on the way here,” Roman announced as he looked up from his phone screen, finally checking the twenty-four text messages she had sent him. “Who’s with Lily now?” Elise questioned as Roman walked her towards the elevator, Emily and Nick trailing behind them. “Maddie is,” he answered, holding the elevator door open for her as he read through the text message chain from Gerri. She had started sending him updates after realising his phone was on silent, knowing he’d eventually pick them up.
“Everything’s gonna be fine, Ellie,” Roman promised, reaching out to squeeze the woman’s arm as she stepped past him and into the elevator.
Though he wasn’t sure which one of them was the most nervous and that included the two junior executives next to him.
The baby had served its eviction notice by the time Fredrick returned back to their office, having stopped to pick up Gerri and Selina on route. “Kid’s definitely a Kellman,” Roman announced as he opened the car door, having long concluded that being exceptionally punctual was a genetic trait amongst Gerri’s family. “Hi, Roman,” Gerri greeted, sliding into the middle of the back seat, freeing the space next to her for him to sit.
“Well, what is it? Do we have a Roman Junior - or a Romey?” He asked, stepping up into the SUV as Fredrick took his duffle bag to the boot. “A boy. Elise made it with all of five minutes to spare,” Gerri reported before she put her hand on his chin to give him a kiss, though mindful of their company.
“Spud doesn’t look impressed,” Roman observed, leaning forward to look at Selina, who was buckled into her booster seat next to Gerri, as the car started towards the hospital. “It’s a boy. I don’t like boys,” Selina complained, folding her arms in front of her chest as she shook her head. “Boys are yucky,” Roman agreed with her, wincing as Gerri nipped him on his arm for being unhelpful.
“Boys are good for some things,” Gerri tried to intervene, mindful that she didn’t want her eldest grandchild to develop some sort of complex over the whole thing. “Like what?” Selina questioned with a long whine.
“Let me get Emily to make you a list,” Roman suggested, deciding this was a task better suited to one of the Fantastic Four. “Do you like your brothers, Romey?” Selina asked, leaning forward so she could see the man sitting on the other side of Gerri. “Sometimes,” he replied truthfully, though these days he liked them more than he had when they were going up.
Selina bit down on the side of her lip as she looked at Roman with as serious of a face as a child her age could muster. “I’m still going to be your favourite though, right?” she asked quietly and Gerri suspected that was the real reason for her reaction to the news. “You’re my second favourite person, spud,” Roman assured her, reaching across Gerri to tap her cheek.
“After GG?” Selina asked.
“After GG,” Roman repeated.
“And Vespie,” the girl added quickly, smiling at the mention of the little dog. “Uhm, I think you and Vespie are equal, kiddo,” he joked, knowing that was the only answer that was going to satisfy the girl.
“Selina, you’re going to be staying with us for a few days,” Gerri announced, deciding it was better to tell the girl before they saw Lily. “Can we go to the big house?” Selina asked as the car pulled into the front of the hospital. “The Hamptons house?” she questioned, just to be sure.
“Yes, please,” Selina nodded as the car came to a stop. “I’m sure we can have that arranged,” Gerri agreed as Roman got out of the car and walked around to help get Selna out.
“Hold on, we gotta go buy a tacky balloon or some shit,” he announced, his mind already made up. This was his one chance to be like one of those guys in the comedy movies who always landed in the hospital room with a funny balloon. “From the hospital gift shop?” Gerri questioned with a raised eyebrow as she opened the boot of the car. “Isn’t that what normal people do?” Roman shrugged, standing on the sidewalk with Selina. “I guess,” she agreed, although she had never seen the inside of a hospital gift shop before.
“Look, I’ll go and get them. You can call Frank or…I don’t know, send out a press release with “ we are a grandmother - again” or some bullshit like that,” Roman insisted, waving her off to wait for them before taking Selina by the hand and making a beeline for the small gift shop to the right of the lobby. It only took exactly three minutes to raid the store of every ‘baby boy’ and blue balloon Roman could carry - not counting the pink one Selina had insisted on getting for herself.
Gerri came off the phone just as the pair re-emerged into the lobby, carrying two gift bags tied with white ribbon. “Did you buy enough balloons?” she asked, looking at him slightly dumbfounded by the fistful of balloons he was carrying. “For now, I think,” he joked, following Gerri through the hallway towards the private ward, following the directions Madeline had sent them.
“Over here!”
Maddie had positioned herself near the vending machines, putting her at the perfect vantage spot to see them when they turned the corner onto the ward. “Hey, Maddie,” Gerri greeted, stepping forward to kiss her youngest daughter on the cheek. “Is that what I think it is?” Maddie smirked as she nodded at the white gift bags that her mother was carrying. “If you think that’s a martini glass, you would be correct, yes,” she acknowledged with a smile. The one thing Lily wanted post-delivery was a martini and it was her motherly duty to make it happen.
“Congratulations, you’re a big sister now. Hopefully you won’t be as annoying as my big sister,” Madeline smirked, ruffling her niece’s curls as she walked past the girl. “Everything went okay?” Gerri asked, walking in step with Maddie as they headed down the hallway towards Lily’s room.
“It’s Lily, did you expect anything else?” Madeline joked, having gotten used to her sister being the overarching eldest daughter. “Fair point,” Gerri agreed, though that didn’t shake off any of the anxiety she felt at that moment. She would feel better once she saw Lily for herself.
“She basically sneezed and pushed the kid out. She’s fine, Mom,” Maddie assured her, though she wasn’t sure she had ever seen her mother look that concerned about her or her sister before. Another reminder of how different things were now. “Gerri’s just angsty,” Roman piped up from behind them.
“I’ll just feel better when I see her,” she said, having chipped off what was left of her nail polish during the car ride over. “She’s in room 14, just down the hall,” Maddie announced as she stopped by the end of the hallway, pointing to the room at the far end.
“Rome,” Madeline called after him, reaching out to grab the man’s arm before he could get away. “Give her a minute,” she suggested, holding him back from going after her mother. “Is this one of those things I’m not going to understand?” he asked, stepping off to the side as Maddie reached down to pick up her niece. “Pretty much,” she agreed, deciding it wasn’t her place to explain it all to him.
Gerri realised where they were going as soon as they turned left. Lily was - as fate would have it - in the same room where she had delivered both her daughters.. The corner suite, away from prying eyes and with a view out over the water. Baird had insisted on it, pulled enough strings to have it on standby. But this time it was a different blonde in the sterile white bed, a bundle tucked in her arms as her partner pushed back the sweat-soaked hair from her forehead.
“How’s my baby?” Gerri greeted, setting the two gift bags down on the table as she made a beeline for her daughter. “He can scream, let me tell you that,” Lily joked, leaning back against the pillow as her mother walked up to the hospital bed.
“I didn’t mean him,” Gerri corrected as she reached out to take Lily’s hand, leaning over the side of the bed, still focusing on her daughter and not the newborn for now.
It was the first time Gerri realised that Lily’s hands were bigger than hers. No longer the little dainty hand that held onto her pinky when it was her and Lily in that bed.
“Well, he came too quickly for me to get an epidural. So I feel a little loopy right now they’ve finally given me some meds,” Lily giggled, sounding exactly like someone who had been given free use of the gas and air.
“Worth it though?” Gerri asked, pushing back Lily’s fringe as she finally turned her attention to the baby wrapped up in white blanket with little gold stars. “Oh, absolutely ,” she agreed, following her mother’s line of sight to the sleeping baby in her arms.
“He looks a little like Dad,” Lily announced, her voice cracking as she forced a smile. Gerri didn’t want to be the one to tell her that all babies looked a little like old men.
But Lily was right. There was a touch of Baird there around the eyes.
“Is Selina okay?” Lily asked, blinking back her tears as she looked up at her mother. “Not particularly fond of the idea of a boy, but I think she’s warming up to it,” Gerri acknowledged, sitting herself down onto the side of the bed next to Lily. “The baby got her a gift,” Elise announced, nodding her head towards the neatly wrapped box that looked suspiciously like an American Girl doll.
For all her complaints about having a brother, Selina would take to the role of big sister as easily as her mother once had.
“Mom, will you take the baby so I can see Selina when she comes in?” Lily asked, conscious of the fact the girl now found herself in the unfamiliar territory of having a sibling and now longer having the undivided attention of both her mothers.
“I don’t know if I remember how to hold a baby,” Gerri confessed in a meek voice that didn’t sound like her own. “It’s like riding a bike, you don’t forget,” Elise assured her from the other side of the hospital bed as Lily moved forward to slowly transfer the baby from her arms to Gerri’s.
It turned out there were some things about motherhood she hadn’t forgotten.
“Hey, little man,” Gerri greeted, captivated by the baby the second he was put in his arms. The more she stared at his face the more she found herself trying to pick out Baird’s features in it. She knew it was silly, after all, babies’ faces changed so quickly. But if nothing else, she was confident the baby in her arms was one of the three nicest she had ever seen.
“I told you it was easy,” Elise smirked as Gerri walked towards the window with the baby, clearing some space around Lily’s hospital for the others. Lily looked over at her wife when Gerri didn’t respond. For all of Gerri’s anxiety, she now felt perfectly tranquil.
The hospital room door opened once again as a set of little Mary Janes echoed across the floor.
“Mama!” Selina announced, launching herself towards the bed. “Be careful of Mama,” Elise tried to warn, but Lily swatted her wife’s hand away, ignoring the pain as Selina sprawled on top of her for the first time in months. Roman followed Selina into the room, though it took him a second to manoeuvre his way through the door.
“You realise I had one baby, not an entire elementary class of them?” Lily asked with an amused smirk as she took in the sight of the balloons Roman was trying to drag into the room after him. “You can never have enough balloons,” he joked, dropping the bouquet of balloons down by the table that seemed to have become the designated spot for gifts.
“Oh,” he said, stopping as he realised Gerri was off to the side of the room, the newest addition bundled up in her arms.
But Gerri didn’t even look at him.
Roman knew then he had lost the ranking of being the number one man in her life.
“So that’s the main man?” he asked as he walked up to her as Elise and Lily gave Selina her gift from the baby. It wasn’t that Roman had never expected to see Gerri holding a baby. He had been preparing himself for the last nine months to seeing this play out before him. But the reality of it was something sweeter, almost tragically so, than what he had imagined.
“Something like that,” Gerri replied, her index finger running down the slope of the baby’s nose and back up again as she kept her eyes fixed on his sleeping face. “You good?” he questioned, leaning against the wall as he crossed his arms, though she still hadn’t looked at him. “I don’t remember the girls being this small,” Gerri admitted in a small voice that makes it sound as if there was a lump forming at the back of her throat.
He had another question to ask her.
“Gerri?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you happy?”
Gerri didn’t say anything, her index finger moving to stroke the baby’s hand, checking each of his fingers in turn. She didn’t need to give him an answer to that question.
“Kid got a name?” Roman asked, trying to move the subject back to safer territory than Gerri’s parenting skills as he looked over at the other two women. “Leo,” Elise announced from where she was perched on the end of the hospital bed.
Leo after the constellation with the brightest stars. Trust Lily Kellman to commit to a theme.
“You’ve got a star and a moon, just need a sun now,” he joked as he moved away from Gerri to sit himself down on one of the visitors' seats at the foot of the bed. “I’m too drugged up right now to even think about that,” Lily whined, a floppy hand over her face as she takes a deep breath. She looked the same way Gerri did after three martinis on an empty stomach.
“I say give her a week,” Elise teased with a smirk as she sat down on the edge of the bed, opening her arms for her eldest child.
“Do you want to hold him?” Gerri offered, suddenly appearing by his side with Leo still in her arms. Roman shook his head. “Maybe later,” he shrugged. Had he ever actually held a baby before? He hadn’t been around much when Sophie and Iverson were babies and he definitely hadn’t seen them when they were that small. What if he dropped it? Roman wasn’t the sort of person who was meant to be going around holding babies as tiny as that one.
He waited until Elise and Gerri had taken Selina to the side before he ventured over to Lily’s bedside. “Are you still good to take Selina?” Lily offered, adjusting Leo in her arms after getting him back from her mother. “She said she wants to go to the Hamptons house. Are you okay with that?” Roman asked, looking at the baby as he wondered whether they all looked a little bit like aliens at that age. “Anything that keeps her entertained. You know she loves that place,” Lily agreed, having no concerns about handing her eldest daughter off to them for a few days.
“You better call your Uncle Frank, I gave him the basics but I think he’d feel better hearing it from you,” Gerri announced from where she was standing by the table, showing Elise the things she had brought into the hospital for Lily’s first martini in a year. “Only if one of you calls Uncle Karl, I’m not dealing with him crying down the phone like a baby,” Lily compromised, having dealt with an unexpectedly tearful Karl the first time he had seen her after Gerri gave him the news.
“Give your baby brother a kiss goodnight,” Elise insisted, looking over Lily’s head at the little girl who leaned forward to drop a kiss on her baby brother’s forehead. “Bye bye, Leo,” Selina whispered, giggling to herself before scrabbling down off the bed and heading back towards Roman as he stood waiting on her by the door.
“We’ll give you a minute,” Roman told Gerri, picking up the American Girl box that Selina had opened earlier and leading the girl back out into the hallway. “Dinner?” he asked Selina as they got back to the bottom of the hallway, though Maddie seemed to have disappeared off somewhere again. Probably in search of a caffeine fix. While Gerri’s blood was rich in gin, Madeline’s required a near constant supply of caffeine. “I want sushi,” Selina decided matter-of-factly.
And, as was often the case, what Selina wanted, she got.
“Do you like your brother?” Roman asked a few minutes later as they stood waiting on Gerri to say her goodbyes. “Maybe, he’s okay,” she shrugged, holding her new American Girl doll a little tighter to her chest. “Just maybe?” he teased, dropping down to her height as he knelt beside her. “I don’t know, boys are funny,” Selina announced with a dramatic sigh, as if she had just been debating the finer points of one of her GG’s law journals.
“What are we doing for dinner?” Gerri called as she walked up the hallway towards them, a definitive skip in her step. “Lady Muck wants sushi,” Roman announced, nodding to the child next to him. “Sushi it is then,” she agreed, stopping to peck on the lips before taking Selina by the hand.
Gerri was, perhaps for the first time in her life, practically floating.
After a pitstop to collect Vesper from the apartment, Fredrick drove the trio from the city and out to the Hamptons towards the weekend house Gerri had bought six months earlier. While they split their time between New York and the Hamptons, this new house felt far more like home than the apartment ever could have. Perhaps because it was theirs. Something they had made together.
The evening went by just like any other. Sushi followed by ice cream and one of what Selina called “GG’s funny movies ”. The credits had started rolling on ‘ Casablanca’ when Gerri excused herself to go and clean the kitchen. That was another difference between the house and apartment. Unlike in New York, Gerri preferred to do as much of her own cleaning here as possible. A new-found sense of domestic tranquillity - or something like that.
“Can Vespie sleep in my room?” Selina asked, nodding down at the puppy who was curled up in the space between her and Roman on the sofa. “You’ve gotta ask GG,” he reminded her, though he doubted there was any way Gerri was going to deny the girl anything that weekend.
“GG!” Selina called, jumping off the sofa before she turned back to pick up Vesper, holding the dog in her arms the way Roman had taught her as she headed towards the kitchen. Roman shook his head as he watched Selina walk out of the room in search of Gerri.
It didn’t surprise him when Gerri shouted back to him that she was putting “Selina and Vesper to bed”. What did surprise him was the fact she didn’t come back into the lounge. Regardless of whether it was just them or if the girls were there, they always ended their evening in the lounge.
Sometimes all they did was talk. They did a lot of talking these days. Sometimes about the past, but almost always about the future. Places they wanted to visit, food Roman wanted to learn how to cook, and things Gerri had planned for them. Though the ‘R’ word hadn’t come up in any of these conversations. Not that Gerri would ever retire. She had floated the idea of moving to consulting sometime in the future or transitioning to become the Studio’s General Counsel once their operations had expanded.
Roman had expected that evening to end with another one of those conversations about the future, but Gerri was nowhere to be seen. Though it wasn’t hard to work out where she was.
‘I thought I’d find you out here,” he announced as he stepped out onto the patio, closing the sliding doors behind him, careful not to spill the drink he had stopped to make on his way to the garden. “I just wanted to take a second after putting Selina down,” Gerri explained, having wrapped herself up in one of her oversized cashmere cardigans.
“A martini, Milady?” he offered, holding out the drink towards her as she grinned at him. “I have you very well trained, Mr. Roy,” she observed, giving him a kiss in exchange for the glass in his hand.
Roman was more than house trained now. He even, occasionally, attempted to cook without setting off the fire alarm. Though it was usually Gerri, or sometimes Elise, who did the cooking when they were here. They still lived on restaurant takeout and overpriced coffees in New York.
“I thought tonight called for one,” he observed, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. “They call it wetting the baby’s head in the motherland,” Roman explained, thinking of the time he had been in England when his cousin was born and his uncles had taken him to the pub at the grand old age of thirteen and asked what beer he wanted. “Trust the Brits to find an excuse to drink,” Gerri chuckled, taking a sip of her martini as she leaned back against the patio table where she had been standing when he arrived.
“I’m sure the kid’s blood oxygen is like 15% martini,” he countered, suspecting it was something every Kellman inherited. “At least Lily didn’t drink when she was pregnant,” Gerri said in a pointed tone as she looked down into her martini glass. Just another thing she hadn’t done ‘right’ when it was her in Lily’s shoes. The last twelve months had shown just how many things she hadn’t done ‘right’ the first time.
Roman rubbed the back of his neck as he took the hint to change the subject. “Vesper okay?” he asked, moving to stand next to her by the patio table. “Curled up in Selina’s bed under a mountain of blankets. I don’t think we’ll be hearing from either of them until breakfast,” Gerri smiled with an amused chuckle. In Selina’s mind, the puppy was her personal toy and four-legged best friend. They were practically inseparable when she was here or at the apartment.
“Why are you hiding out here?” Roman asked, though it wasn’t unusual to find her in the backyard. After years of being stuck in a corner office, Gerri seemed to use any excuse to get outside when they were here, whether it was swimming laps in the pool or reading in the garden.
“Just looking at the stars,” she shrugged with a pulled smile and for a second Roman thought her eyes looked glassy, as if she was trying not to cry. Though he knew they were happy tears. She had another star to look out for now and things couldn't have been more different from what they were only a year ago.
What had sold Roman on the house was the view. It was rare to get such an unobstructed view of the sky, as if there was another house around for miles. He had made a point of buying her a telescope - one of those sleek black ones to set in her home office - to stargaze with Selina.
This was their home. Not the penthouse high above the New York skyline. That had been Gerri’s - even if it had come to become his as well. Roman Roy had lived in twenty-five houses in his life but only one had ever felt like this.
Now was the right time. He turned to look at the night sky, picked the brightest star he could find, and made his wish.
Roman had one last question to ask.
“Gerri.”
“Yeah?”
Two words. That’s all it took to change their lives. Two words. Seven letters.
“Marry me?”
References:
Gerri’s RECNY ball dress is this silk green Carolina Herrera look.
If you don’t know what “ the jackal ” is, may I please suggest you get your shit together and watch West Wing?
The reference to Lily wearing ‘ stars in her hair’ is a nod to Empress Sisi’s stars . I like to imagine Elise would buy her similar custom ones for each of their children.