12 Works by Definately_not_a_cat
Listing Works
-
Destiny is Calling (Don’t Leave Her on Hold) by Definately_not_a_cat, madasahatter (gaytriangle)
Fandoms: Sherlock (TV), Merlin (TV)
08 Jun 2026
Tags
Summary
Merlin - now going as Colin - has survived both being arrested for murder and becoming friends with Sherlock Holmes. One of these was harder than the other, and it wasn't hanging around in a cushy jail cell. They didn't even torture him! What wusses.
He's almost settled into his new normal, when something old reawakens from a prison-like death and something new joins the hunt. It's going to take every friend he's made (and some reluctant allies) to pull through on this. After all, destiny is calling, and she doesn't like to be kept waiting.
Or: part 2 of our fun romp with an immortal Merlin through Sherlock's bad ideas, John even worse suggestions, and the very last inch of Greg's tenuous grasp on both patience and sanity. (Featuring enough OCs to add a plausible level of diversity to modern London.)
Series
-
Destiny is Calling (Pick Up The Damn Phone) by Definately_not_a_cat, madasahatter (gaytriangle)
Fandoms: Merlin (TV), Sherlock (TV)
26 Oct 2025
Tags
Summary
Arthur dies.
Camelot burns.
And yet, despite it all, Merlin survives.
He persists, long after his friends have perished, experiences the rise and fall of empires, watches man walk on the moon- but Sherlock Holmes?Meeting him may cost Merlin everything (Including, predictably, his sanity).
Or: Merlin decides to move to inner city 20th Century London to pull his life back together. Instead, he meets John Watson and Sherlock Holmes and- well let's just say his life gets a lot more interesting then he had planned on.
[The mature rating is mostly for some more heavy handed crime scene and murder descriptions, as well as some focus on mental health. Don't worry though! We add warnings in the start-of-chapter notes, and mark parts to skip.
It isn't nearly as serious as the tags suggest, we promise there’s loads of fun stuff in here too to balance out the angst (like ample sass and sarcasm; this is a Sherlock Merlin crossover, after all)]
Series
-
Get the London Look -The Scotland Yard Interludes by Definately_not_a_cat, madasahatter (gaytriangle)
Fandoms: Sherlock (TV)
28 Jan 2025
Tags
Summary
After rescuing their friend from unjust imprisonment, the Scotland Yard crew have time for a little bit of a breather. Sherlock, John and Colin may continue their antics in centre stage, but in the wings Molly Hooper, Sally Donovan, and Greg Lestrade have lives to live, bills to pay, and and the ever so slightly supernatural to weather.
Or: adventures in secret santa rigging, shovel stealing, and supernatural stirrings, as told though texts, newspaper scraps and accidental voicemails.
Series
-
The Clawsome Caper of Sally Donovan by Definately_not_a_cat for madasahatter (gaytriangle)
Fandoms: Sherlock (TV)
28 Jan 2024
Tags
Summary
Where Sally loses any hope she had at a nice evening off and gains a few more hairballs than expected.
Or: What was Catra up to while Colin was in jail? Making it everyone else’s problem, of course.
Series
-
Santa Buddy by Definately_not_a_cat for madasahatter (gaytriangle), catwiththecream
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
26 Dec 2023
Tags
Summary
Eddie just wanted to pick up some extra cash and get through the holiday season with some of his dignity left intact, thank you very much.
One missing mall Santa later, he would settle for getting through with his sanity intact. Now if only this charity singer would stop accidentally making him blush...Fresh off their flight into LA, Eddie ends up stepping in as a mall Santa at the same shopping centre that Buck spontaneously volunteers to be a charity caroler at. What follows could only be described as the single true interpretation of Bublé's cover.
Or:
A local firefighter’s increasingly less subtle attempts at flirting with obliviousdilfmall Santa -
All souls wait; Some souls wander by Definately_not_a_cat, madasahatter (gaytriangle)
Fandoms: Merlin (TV)
02 Nov 2023
Tags
Summary
Somewhere in England, a lot downwards and a little to the left, was a lake. This lake did not exist. Nestled just around the corner from this non-existant lake was The Village, which also didn't exist, and it was generally accepted that even if they did, it was a very bad idea to try find them.
Unfortunately for everyone involved, accademia doesn't particularly care about reason or self-preservation.
Or;
A phd student just wants to write his thesis and ends up becoming an unwilling accessory in a ghost storySeries
-
What is love? (Baby don't hurt me) by Definately_not_a_cat
Fandoms: Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023)
07 Jul 2023
Tags
Summary
Simon and Doric have decided that they're courting.
What comes next is that hard part.*
Or, the 5 times Simon and Doric decide to outsource the question: What is love? And get the opposite of an answer.
(and the 1 time where they sort of figure it out themselves (with a little help, of course)). -
All roads lead to the M25 London orbital motorway by Definately_not_a_cat, madasahatter (gaytriangle)
Fandoms: Merlin (TV)
01 Jan 2023
Tags
Summary
All Colin wanted to do was get his life back on track, thank you very much.
Instead the past refuses to let him have a day off, and he has a very interesting encounter with a would-be-ghost.
Series
-
The Lake that Time Forgot by Definately_not_a_cat, madasahatter (gaytriangle)
Fandoms: Merlin (TV)
31 Oct 2022
Tags
Summary
The lake stood undisturbed for millennia. Unnoticed, unfrequented, a wall drawn between it and the world. And yet, as all good ghost stories will tell you, that wall is not solid. As time waxes and wanes, such barriers can become as thin as a veil, and certain somethings can drip and drop and bleed through.
The lake stood undisturbed for millennia- that is, until three unlucky children tripped, stumbled, and tore through the veil, finding themselves in the place that time forgot.
Or: the perils of children snooping on Halloween night.
Series
-
the Great Glowing Coils of the Universe, Unwinding by Definately_not_a_cat, madasahatter (gaytriangle)
Fandoms: Merlin (TV)
25 Oct 2021
Tags
Summary
All things are unravelling. Time and space, life and death, everything that ever is or was, floating, suspended in the water of a long abandoned lake.
Or: what's Arthur up to? A millennium is a long time to sink beneath the waves.
Series
-
Beauty and the Blacksmith by Definately_not_a_cat, madasahatter (gaytriangle)
Fandoms: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)
14 Apr 2021
Tags
Summary
this started out as a blacksmith pun and now we're here
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,955
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 1
- Hits:
- 21
-
There is No Future, There is No Past (Live This Moment as My Last) by Definately_not_a_cat, madasahatter (gaytriangle) for Definately_not_a_cat
Fandoms: Merlin (TV)
23 Mar 2021
Tags
Summary
Camelot had been gone a long time, and Merlin was almost content to be alone. One cat later, and he's starting to rethink that assessment; anything has to be better than this little bastard, right? (And then he's kidnapped, which has certainly added some perspective to his furry little problem.)
Or: an almost modern Merlin adopts a cat, falls foul of some powerful people, and tries to pull his life together.
Series