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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Clark looked at Bruce, Bruce looked at Clark. Both of them looked back down at the thing. They looked back at each other in perfect sync.
    “Bruce,” Clark said. “Please tell me that isn’t what I think it is."
    “Okay,” Bruce said. “It’s not what you think it is.” He paused. “Can I tell you what I think it is?”
    Clark stared at him helplessly. “Can I stop you?"
    Bruce snorted. “No. Also, I’m pretty sure we found your anatomical hot dog."
    ***
    Bruce didn’t think it was unreasonable to have sex with his husband, especially if it gave him a chance to study Clark's reproductive organs. Clark, whose midlife crisis was finishing puberty and is barely two steps above being a virgin, is barely coping with the fact he thinks people are hot. No one has resolved their issues enough for this. Somehow, they figure things out anyway.

    Also, since when are plants so complicated?

    Featuring: Communication so healthy it’s suspicious, alien anatomy, weirdos (husbands edition), sexual confusion, confusing sexualities, unconditional love, debatably appropriate use of superpowers, self loathing (two limited time flavors!), allusions to grilled food, cuddles, emotional intimacy, and pollen as a sexual byproduct.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,185
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    186
    Kudos:
    880
    Bookmarks:
    106
    Hits:
    9,584

    24 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “Congratulations, you just finished puberty.”
    Clark blinked. Then he blinked again. “What?”
    ***
    Being forced to reexamine every aspect of his life because the unholy brainchild of Lex Luthor and Poison Ivy unlocked an entirely new section of his biology was not on Clark’s bucket list. Which was good, because Clark wasn’t going to do that. It wasn’t that big of a deal, really! He was fine, everything was fine, and things would go back to normal sooner or later. Honestly, things would already be pretty normal if it wasn’t for Clark’s newfound desire to maul his best friend.

    Bruce, meanwhile, has a bite on his neck, an unrequited crush, and hundreds of pages of Kryptonian documents that needed translating. Oh, and eight kids who are maybe a little too good at meddling.
    Everyone else is just along for the ride.

    Featuring: Copious blankets, platonic intimacy, the Justice League being surprisingly functional, sex pollen (now with 200% less sex!), Kansas typical repression, pillow forts, rebar, romantic intimacy, Batfam typical shenanigans, untranslatable words (coming to a dead alien language near you!), and the fictional concept of Omegaverse, which is also here for some reason.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    73,890
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    286
    Kudos:
    1,603
    Bookmarks:
    344
    Hits:
    20,756

    24 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 39

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    (And 1 reason they win anyways)

    After a very brief alien invasion, the Kryptonians must concede that whatever weapon the Humans has is a true threat. In attempt to get their hands on such technology they offer a truce;

    Their first born, the successor to the house of El; Kal.

    Of course, at first contact, Batman is ready to throw himself into the flames.

    What a self sacrificing idiot.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,173
    Chapters:
    1/6
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    137
    Bookmarks:
    39
    Hits:
    1,174

    07 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 43

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    When Superman takes a day off, emergencies included, Batman has some ideas on why that might be.

    Maybe those assumptions are wrong, but they're a good excuse to check up on his friend and make sure he's alright.

    Clark on the other hand, wants to be left alone to molt in peace.

    Can be read as a sequel to 10 ways to integrate yourself into human society.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,390
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    526
    Bookmarks:
    43
    Hits:
    3,235

    07 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Superman tries his best to always, without fail, be human.

    Which isn't always an easy task. It was easier as Clark sure; a human man with a human job and human interests, but the world needed Superman, who definitely was not human. In those moments he shed his outer layers, the polite meek layers of a small-town man doing his best in the big city and became something else entirely—something inhuman; Kryptonian.

    Unfortunately for him, Batman Can see straight through him.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,864
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    901
    Bookmarks:
    127
    Hits:
    5,317

    07 Jun 2026