Padre_Lucifer
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Summary
Naruto Uzumaki finally had enough. After how Konoha treated him, why should he fight for its sake? He'd rather leave, and with the help of what's in his gut he does just that.
Hunter-nin, capture squads, assassination attempts, it's all part of life as a missing-nin. Not that Naruto minds. He'll put up with all of it, if that's what it takes to live free.
Really though, after the first few times, you'd think the villages would stop sending kunoichi after the guy with supernatural foxy charms. Luckily for Naruto, no one ever accused the higher-ups of being all that bright.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 93,067
- Chapters:
- 27/?
- Comments:
- 275
- Kudos:
- 1,015
- Bookmarks:
- 401
- Hits:
- 87,614
Bookmarked by Padre_Lucifer
28 May 2026
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Summary
When Yusami finds out she's been dropped into the Naruto universe, she doesn't know if she should feel relieved or cheated to have missed out on all of the cool ninja stuff.
"Both" she decides as she looks down at her favorite customer and wonders how she can sneak extra veggies into his bag without him noticing, "Definitely both."
Or: a self-insert becomes a simple grocer in Konohagakure and decides that if no one else is going to adopt the baby protagonist, then it's free real estate.
Featuring: a civilian woman beating Danzou at his own game, Naruto finding the love he's always deserved, and a hefty amount of ANBU operatives wondering if the Uchiha are accepting volunteers for that little coup/revolution.
Series
- Part 1 of Take This Hearth and Make a Home
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 56,319
- Chapters:
- 11/?
- Collections:
- 89
- Comments:
- 2,351
- Kudos:
- 11,748
- Bookmarks:
- 5,149
- Hits:
- 226,930
Bookmarked by Padre_Lucifer
24 May 2026
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Shallow Sansa by rummy_cat
Fandoms: Game of Thrones (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, Shallow Hal (2001)
14 Dec 2020
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Summary
The GOT/Shallow Hal crossover that nobody asked for. (If you've never seen Shallow Hal - watch it - you won't be disappointed)
Sansa Stark is shallow. She's had a string of relationships with good-looking men who always end up disappointing her. Perhaps her standards are too high, but she can't help but want to find that unicorn of a man she's conjured up in her mind. Through some higher power she is gifted/cursed with the ability to see on the outside what a person truly is on the inside, and finds herself crushing on a hunk of man that spurns her advances.
Bookmarked by Padre_Lucifer
21 May 2026
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Summary
A public scandal. A ruined relationship. And Narcissa Malfoy, ever the strategist, sees her opening.
Now Hermione’s caught in the crossfire of high society, whispered schemes, and a slow-burn attraction to the last man she expected.
Narcissa’s pulling the strings—and she plays to win.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 85,385
- Chapters:
- 38/38
- Comments:
- 1,209
- Kudos:
- 2,901
- Bookmarks:
- 1,188
- Hits:
- 102,688
Bookmarked by Padre_Lucifer
22 Mar 2026
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Summary
Harry gets invited to tea by Narcissa Malfoy, the discussion veers into a territory Harry could have only imagined. And has.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,822
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 25
- Kudos:
- 920
- Bookmarks:
- 230
- Hits:
- 36,609
Bookmarked by Padre_Lucifer
15 Mar 2026