Ratdeath



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Percy Jackson knew that he wasn't always the most aware of his surroundings but he's almost positive that he didn't originally fall asleep on this beach. Nor does he recognize the pretty boy standing over him wrapped in his finest bedsheet. Once the boy introduces himself, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that this Telemachus, prince of Ithaca was THE Telemachus, prince of Ithaca.

    Surrounded by blood hungry suitors and stripped of the comfort of his pants, Percy isn't sure how he's going to avoid offending the gods here. He didn't have the greatest track record of that back home. Telemachus seemed happy to have a friend in the palace and the queen looked at him with knowing eyes. What she knew, Percy wasn't sure but she definetly knew something. With Athena at Telemachus' side and Apollo following Percy around, this new land was shaping up to be very different than his own.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    56,963
    Chapters:
    17/?
    Comments:
    744
    Kudos:
    6,036
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    1,761
    Hits:
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    27 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    17

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    Star Wars in the style of British Pantomime: where everyone gets to be their best self, and puns save the Galaxy!

    Words:
    31,678
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    628

    25 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 55

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    Sirius is finally free, and Harry is looking forward to having a real family who cares. But then everything falls apart. Can Severus Snape figure out what happened to Harry and the secret he is hiding? Harry and Severus are thrown together due to an impulsive action by Sirius Black.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    118,060
    Chapters:
    37/37
    Comments:
    75
    Kudos:
    271
    Bookmarks:
    55
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    6,819

    23 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    25

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    ☆ACTUAL WORD COUNT: 67,232☆

    “We’re getting you out of here, okay?” Percy was sure that Draco was conscious, but he seemed too deep in his fear to register Percy's words. His arms trembled in front of his face. He was holding his breath, trying to hear each step that brought Percy and Nico closer. His entire body was tensed as if he was waiting for them to get close enough to kick him in the gut.

    OR
    Draco gets rescued from Bellatrix by demigods who don't know about the wizarding world.

    Nico gets kidnapped by the Order of the Phoenix who mistakes him for a powerful Death Eater.

    ☆ACTUAL WORD COUNT: 67,232☆

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    80,963
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    1,067
    Kudos:
    3,292
    Bookmarks:
    801
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    76,396

    21 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Paul used to think all the time about Sally and Poseidon’s relationship after she told him. It was a strange thing for Paul, after all, in all his previous relationships, the ex she told him to never worry about wasn’t the king of the ocean, whom she had a kid with. A very powerful and accomplished kid who was now a seven-year-old, who has no idea of the power that he has, or knows that he uses to regularly beat up gods before breakfast. Now, standing here on this cold beach, still grappling with the fact that he’s twenty-five again, he can’t help but compare Sally and Poseidon for what is probably the hundredth time. If Poseidon was the ocean, Sally was the Titanic, beautiful, elegant, and quite in its strength and integrity, but even though the Titanic might have been the strongest ship of its time, it was just another ship that the ocean sank.

    And standing right here in the past, facing the father of monsters like this, that couldn’t be clearer to him.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,818
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    351
    Kudos:
    1,440
    Bookmarks:
    495
    Hits:
    57,475

    20 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    16