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    As a straight man, Ilya Rozanov has never had a gay roommate before, but it’s going pretty well. Shane Hollander is kind, silly, and an even bigger hockey nut than Ilya.

    So when Shane starts bringing men over, and Ilya begins to want to bash their fucking heads in, Ilya comes to a startling conclusion: He must be homophobic.

    (He’s jealous.)

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    19 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane was there when Ilya got the call, his arm heavy across Ilya's stomach, like even in sleep he could tell something was trying to take Ilya away from him.

    When Boston realize Ilya wants out, they send him to the highest bidder. The highest bidder is LA.

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    15 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane is silent for so long that Rozanov leans, slouching against the doorframe, and raises his eyebrows at him expectantly. “Yes? You are selling bibles?”
    “You fucked my girlfriend.” It tears out of him.
    “Ah,” Rozanov drawls, as if the thought is just now occurring to him, “yes. I did.”

     

    based on a tweet

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    08 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    ILYA ROZANOV has wired SHANE HOLLANDER $5,000
    Remarks: Moya lyubov please unblock me

    ILYA ROZANOV has wired SHANE HOLLANDER $5,000
    Remarks: Let me know when you’re ready to talk i will kneel

    ILYA ROZANOV has wired SHANE HOLLANDER $5,000
    Remarks: character not enough but i’ll kneel and apologi

    ILYA ROZANOV has wired SHANE HOLLANDER $5,000
    Remarks: ze to you for hours if you want me to i miss

    ILYA ROZANOV has wired SHANE HOLLANDER $10,000
    Remarks: you so much

     

    Yuna Hollander (Husband's Mom): Did you just wire my son $30K?

    Ilya: It’s the only platform he cannot block me from Yuna I am desperate

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    31 May 2026

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    Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper called it an international emergency in his address to the Canadian public. Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin claimed Russia was devoting every resource to it. The endless loops of crawling chyrons titled it Hockey Held Hostage. Eventually, Wikipedia settled on ‘The Sochi Affair’:

    The Sochi Affair (Russian: Сочинское дело; French: affaire Sotchi) was a multinational hostage and extortion crisis that began on Thursday, February 20, 2014, when Olympic ice hockey players, Shane Hollander of Canada and Ilya Rozanov of Russia, were abducted from the Iceberg Skating Palace during the Sochi Winter Olympics and held hostage in southwestern Kazakhstan for 3 months, 19 days.

    The world was captivated when Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander went missing, but no one will ever know what they found in the face of survival.

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    28 May 2026